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  2. Hi Carlos, Have you ever had your hormones tested? AD's can affect HPA axis function and throw off our hormonal regulation. I've had many of your symptoms and found that I was chronically low in Testosterone for a lot of years. Not saying this is the case, but something to consider if you haven't. It's been a saving grace to have my Testosterone back to a normal level. All the best, Rob.
  3. Journal Five days since my last reduction. The last couple of days have been a real challenge trying to remain calm when my emotions are all over the place and I'm starting to feel really discouraged. Brain fog, cognitive impairment while short-lived, is upsetting and disconcerting and a reminder that the way my brain was meant to function naturally has most definitely been altered by these drugs and drives home just how much I regret starting them. Haven't been sleeping well, up at 4:00 a.m. most nights over the last month and it's taking its toll. When I'm feeling like this, while I know the emotional response is related to withdrawal, am finding it harder and harder to feel confident about continuing to taper as the finish line is so very far away. While I desperately want to stop taking this poison, am starting to question whether I have the stamina to deal with withdrawal symptoms every month for the next 8-10 years. Hopefully tomorrow will be a brighter day.
  4. Today
  5. Journaling-actually got outside today and studied with a classmate and went to Aldi and the grocery store. I was so scatter brained while I was out shopping. I got in to Aldi and realized my purse was in my book bag. Thank goodness I only had one item in my cart and no one took it to use while I ran out to retrieve my pocket book. The grocery store was a little bit busier and I parked my cart down an aisle to look for something and then forgot which aisle it is was on. Had a slight panic over that but was able to gather myself and find it. When stuff like that happens or if I see an old friend while I'm out and feeling happy, the duloxetine sweats creep in-hate when that happens. It's almost like any emotional range I have makes that happen. All of these symptoms I'm realizing are part of the drug which gives me a different perspective. Last night I spent quite a bit of time studying action potentials, synapse, calcium and sodium channels, serotonin binding on the post synapse neuron. I have lots more to learn. Reading and pictures help give me a better understanding. So, yes today was a good day-2 in a row!
  6. DMV64: Reinstate Saphris?

    Today was better. I think I want to split my klonopin dose as earlier suggested though. Thinking about it...
  7. Thanks Gridley. I've read about supplementing magnesium. Isn't this the one that is gentle on our brains? I think that's what I read. Right now I'm using up my supply of JP(juiceplus+). It's so expensive but they came out with their own omega product this past summer. It's not omega fish oil, but oils derived from fruit seeds. I found it interesting. I am not endorsing this product, just speaking to my own experience. Enjoy the evening!
  8. Yesterday
  9. I’m so afraid to take any kind of supplement or medication ever again ): I’m terrified of another reaction to something. Is it possible for either of those to cause any kind of reaction?
  10. It's important to learn and use non drug coping techniques. Claire Weekes was a doctor who suffered from anxiety and learned and taught ways to cope. She talks about the second fear, or fear of the fear. This happens when our bodies produce feelings and because we don't understand what is happening we then become fearful/scared which adds more feelings to the body. This can then end up escalating into a panic attack. We can learn ways to understand and recognise what is happening and calm ourselves so that we don't add fear to the original discomfort. Audio: First Aid for Panic (4 minutes) Audio: How to Recover from Anxiety - Dr Claire Weekes Anxiety Stuff - all kinds of stuff about anxiety attacks and things that help ... Claire Weekes' Method of Recovering from a Sensitized Nervous System Also lots of videos - just go to YouTube and type in Claire Weekes Non-drug techniques to cope Some members find Magnesium and Omega-3 Fish Oil helpful. I personally find that magnesium takes the edge off my anxiety. Try them separately and only a small amount to test.
  11. rattledbytherush: Trying to time this all responsibly

    Alright. Step one complete--liquid has been acquired. So I did what is maybe a hazardous transition, from 50mg tablet straight into 50mg liquid. I've been doing this for about a week now. Unfortunately, I've been sick for three days after having the nastiest hangover. Some nights I can have five drinks and be fine; others, like this one, I got extremely sick and have felt like I have had the flu all week. I'm feeling like the medication switch could be exacerbating this. At any rate, this is a good opportunity to take care of myself regardless of where symptoms are coming from. I suspect this sick feeling will probably return on some level with each dose adjustment. Once all symptoms are gone on this dose (2.5 mL), I'll be making the cut down to the 45 mg equivalent. Hopefully I'll be alive and kicking again soon
  12. Hi. I wanted to share something very simple. I see some people have similar advice, like pottery and gardening. Something that has helped me is to work with stuff that require attention to detail. It calms me down a lot, and my mind is not wandering off in the same way. For example I sat and decorated a glass jar for about 3 hours without problem, because it was an escape for me I think. Same with puzzles in the beginning of my withdrawal like someone else mentioned, but not anymore. I also picked a small part of a certain kind of flower and cleaned them up (took around 2 hours) in case I wanted to make a wine out of it, but when I was done picking and fixing the flowers I was satisfied and the rest (wine-making) felt more like a burden. So the very small things that take time, are extremely relaxing for me at least. Just wanted to mention that. And pets of course, like others have mentioned. Pets are invaluable to me. It gives a responsibility and most of all something to care for (which I believe is very important).
  13. Has anyone else suffered with this depression that is literally triggered by anything different? I get anxious and depressed when it gets dark outside or if it’s cloudy and dreary outside (which is not normal for me AT ALL, i usually love night time and rain and cloudy days) but basically the changing of night to day triggers it and day to night. And now coming back home after being out triggers it too. But i also do this annoying thing where i think about it 24/7 and kind of bring it on myself anytime I’m in a window ): when i have a window all i can think about is when the next wave will hit. I just feel so hopeless about everything now, I’m bringing on all these new worries and problems for myself like my future and a future career and all the negative things I’ll have to endure in the future. When does it freaking end.
  14. GirlfromD: Insomnia

    That is great news, GirlfromD! Thank you for the very encouraging update.
  15. Hi! In my country we have a kind of economical support you can get if you can't work. Not really sick-listed, but similar I suppose. Now I'm at the point where I've finally met a good psychiatric doctor who is very respectful and actually listens to me. But she did find it weird that I still feel unwell after being off the meds for so many months. Making them believe me, mainly the psychologist I'm about to meet in the near future, will determine if they will give me economical support or not I believe. Because I suspect they might give me a permanent Bipolar disorder instead (because of the manic-depressive symptoms) when they don't understand the situation. Right now I live with my parents, and to not be able to provide for myself adds a lot of worry and feelings of guilt, even if my parents are very supporting. It just doesn't feel right to me. Do any of you have experiences of how to deal with people from psychiatric hospitals who don't seem to understand this ad withdrawal stuff? Because I don't want to seem like a know-it-all and give them a bunch of papers and links. I mostly want to present it in a way that makes me not seem crazy first of all . I lost my train of thought now - as usual, but you get the idea. How would I go about approaching the issue in the best way possible without seeming condescending/know-all/crazy? Thank you
  16. Here is SA's topic: cipro-levaquin-azithromycin-z-pack-and-other-antibiotics
  17. mattom75: SAM-E withdrawal symptoms

    Hi mattom, Please create a drug signature following the preferred format explained below. Once we know your drug history we will be better able to offer you suggestions about your individual situation Thank you. A request: Would you summarize your history in a signature - ALL drugs, doses, dates, and discontinuations & reinstatements, in the last 12-24 months particularly? Please leave out symptoms and diagnoses. A list is easier to understand than one or multiple paragraphs. Any drugs prior to 24 months ago can just be listed with start and stop years. Please use actual dates or approximate dates (mid-June, Late October) rather than relative time frames (last week, 3 months ago) Spell out months, e.g. "October" or "Oct."; 9/1/2016 can be interpreted as Jan. 9, 2016 or Sept. 1, 2016. Link to Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature.
  18. GirlfromD: Insomnia

    Hi everybody. I just wanna tell you all that im now so much better than i was a year ago. Im starting to feel more and more like my old self. I can spend time with my family now, watch movies and go for long walks, i still have a way to go, but i am much more happy than i was last year! I just wanna tell you all that there is hope, that if you are patient things will get better! I know that sometimes things feels like an uphill struggle, but then just think of the view from the top, cause you will reach the top sooner or later. I hope things will continue to improve, i can only hope for the best.
  19. Hello, Carlos, and Welcome to Surviving Antidepressants.org (SA). I am tapering Escitalopram and I congratulate you on getting off this drug. We ask all members to create a drug which will appear below every post you make. This makes it easy for everyone to see your history at a glance. Please follow these directions to create a signature in the preferred format. Please also remember to update whenever you make a change so it remains current. Thank you. A request: Would you summarize your history in a signature - ALL drugs, doses, dates, and discontinuations & reinstatements, in the last 12-24 months particularly? Please leave out symptoms and diagnoses. A list is easier to understand than one or multiple paragraphs. Any drugs prior to 24 months ago can just be listed with start and stop years. Please use actual dates or approximate dates (mid-June, Late October) rather than relative time frames (last week, 3 months ago) Spell out months, e.g. "October" or "Oct."; 9/1/2016 can be interpreted as Jan. 9, 2016 or Sept. 1, 2016. Link to Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature. Please let us know your dosages, rate of tapering, when you went to zero mg, and your dosage before you went to zero. SA recommends a taper of no more than 10% per month with a four-week hold between drops. If you went faster than this, this might account for any withdrawal symptoms you might be having. Why taper by 10% of my dosage? Here is a link to many of the symptoms that often accompany withdrawal. They differ from person to person. Dr Joseph Glenmullen's WD Symptoms Checklist The next three links deal with navigating with withdrawal process. Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization Stabilising - What Does That Mean? Withdrawal Normal Description These two links are also helpful in understanding what's happening to you. Video: Healing From Antidepressants - Patterns of Recovery What is Happening in Your Brain I too am having great difficulty gaining weight and have lost several kilos since tapering escitalopram. Libido reduction is a common withdrawal symptom. If you Google "SurvivingAntidepressant.org hair loss" you will find several posts deal with SSRI's and hair loss. As far as supplements go, SA recommends only two: magnesium and omega fish oil.
  20. backtoreality: Tapering off Effexor and Xanax

    Hi, everyone I'm down to 19 mgs of Effexor from 150 mgs. eight months ago. Slowly tapering by counting beads and holding for a couple of weeks when the brain zaps/anger/sleep issues reappear. It's been a long slog but life is getting better, then not so great, then better, etc. Foot pain is not a problem but mud butt (every morning no matter what I've eaten before) is a side-effect as is a big aversion to most food. My weight has held steady so when I do eat, it seems to help, even if I don't have an appetite. Now is not the time to be impatient. I've been really lucky to find this forum and extra lucky to have a doctor who "gets it" Slow is the only way to go, for me. Hang in there and remember there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You are worth it!
  21. Makes absolute sense. I actually just spent the last hour or so being very nostalgic, looking through old photos. It felt like a good distraction but also scary to feel so distant from it. Glad the agitation died down a little. Hope you get some rest tonight
  22. Thank you so much for your reply!! I never knew what an intrusive thought was before either. I now know I’ve always had them, i just never gave them any attention because i knew they meant nothing! Wish that could still be the case. I know hat I️ am getting better but i start convincing myself I’m not and it’s like things start all over just not as severe as before! I just still can’t believe it can do this to someone. I’m so sorry you’ve been having to suffer through what you have as well. This site definitely helps with the loneliness this experience can bring on someone
  23. This evening I’ve been much less agitated. Little mini waves of it but then died back down. Would love to be free of it. I cut out sugar probably a month ago and wonder if I’ve had WD from that?! I do miss a bit bit of ice cream or a little cupcake... I’m deeply affected by the slightest memory! My son asked me what cars I’d owned. Not only was it a task to remember but it totally triggered my anxiety thinking back and feeling like I’m just not me, the memories of years gone by that just don’t feel my own, does that make sense? Like thinking back makes me want to jump, with nervousness. It’s so bizarre. And deep sadness as I feel my life will not be happy again.
  24. Hi frogie and everyone else thank you for clearing up zoloft. I did wonder when I looked it up and saw it was Ssri. Unfortunately zofran is not available in the uk like a lot of things. Now if you could suggest something for anxiety caused by this drug I would go to the ends of the earth to get it. I hope the evening ends up better than you expect and if your fiancé isn’t too keen either you shouldn’t have a late night. You have done a lot today good on you.
  25. geoffwich: Cymbalta + Abilify

    Geoff -- Just a quick note to say I identify with much of what you wrote. When I started seriously tapering a bit over three years ago it was largely because I wanted to lose weight. I'm tall and before beginning my AD had always been relatively thin, so I didn't like being overweight. Before beginning Celexa I was in the low 180's but I quickly rose to 220 and stayed there for years despite exercise, dieting, etc. After three years tapering, I'm now down to 195, close to where I want to be (abt 187). Also, like you I was basically ok mentally taking my AD everyday--20 mg of Celexa, though there were some issues which I won't go into here. I sometimes think it might have been better just to stay on the drug and see how things went. I knew, though, that nothing I could do--short of starving myself--would help me lose the weight that I'd gained. Also, because of my weight issues I was taking a med for high blood pressure, and a couple years before I started my taper my blood sugar rose, getting into the "pre-diabetic" range. I decided to taper three yeas ago. Since then I've lost 25 pounds. I'm no longer taking a blood pressure med. My glucose levels are consistently normal. My bi-yearly blood tests that used to scare me a bit with fatty liver indications no longer indicate that's an issue. So, from a physical perspective, I'm healthier now than I was and I credit that to my slow taper off Celexa. The side effects of tapering are the mental health issues that you have felt yourself. Though I've had some truly horrible experiences at times, both my neuro-anxiety and neuro-depression are better than they once were and when I'm having a window, which come more frequently now, I feel very good. Very hopeful, positive about the future. It's good that you wrote what you did. Best to get it out there, see what others think, so that you can make decisions informed by experience. I hope the best for you! Myndfull
  26. Hi Lindsay. I had a very similar reaction to zoloft as you did. However, I wasn’t as smart as you (I hadn’t found this site yet & didn’t know anything about ssris, adverse reactions or withdrawal syndrome) and kept listening to the doctors trying different medications to try to get rid of the symptoms from the first bad reaction which made everything 100x worse. I’m glad you stopped when you did. Also, I was on the drugs for a longer time period than you were in the past which could be why I’m still having issues. For whatever reason sometimes these drugs can back fire even after previously tolerating them okay months or years before. & yes, one pill of Zoloft also made me pace around and have intrusive thoughts out of nowhere. Never even knew what an intrusive thought was before that day. Anyways, just wanted to welcome you and let you know you aren’t alone. Things will get better.
  27. Layla: hi

    Hi, Layla, Welcome to Surviving Antidepressants. I too am tapering Lexapro and I congratulate you on your taper. This is your main thread, where you can ask questions and give updates. Can I ask you to add to your signature the dosage you were on before you went to 0mg, how long you had been on that dosage, and how much time you allowed between dosage decreases during your taper? Here are the instructions for making a signature: Please put your withdrawal history in your signature SA recommends tapering by 10% of your current dose with a hold of at least 4 weeks before your next decrease. the 10% taper method is a harm reduction approach to going off psychiatric drugs. Why taper by 10% of my dosage? A one-year taper off 20mg Lexapro is faster than our recommendation. How are you feeling? Please read these links to better understand withdrawal from an antidepressant. What is withdrawal syndrome? The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization Brain Remodelling If you are having withdrawal symptoms and they are not tolerable, after two months reinstatement of a small dose is an option to relieve symptoms, followed by a slow taper. According to medical knowledge, reinstatement is the only way to alleviate withdrawal symptoms. Reinstatement is best done immediately upon appearance of withdrawal symptoms. The more time that passes, the less likely it is to work. The length of this window of opportunity varies according to the individual. Sometimes people can reinstate successfully months after quitting. Others cannot. Often a partial dose will relieve withdrawal symptoms. About reinstating and stabilizing to reduce withdrawal symptoms Let us know if this is something you are interested in and we can suggest a starting dose. Please do not reinstate before we advise you.
  28. They are all very fake people here. You know that. My fiancé gets mad and tells me to just stay home, but I know he doesn't mean it at all. You are lucky you don't have to do these parties. They aren't fun for me. I will let you know how it is. Take care, Frogie xx
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