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Hi, I am is 41 years old. I was on Venlafaxine XR for my vestibular migraine in 2019 to 2021. My dosage was 37.5 mg one tablet every 3rd day which was suggested by my neurologist as i was getting hives from taking the medicine. For my hives I was taking half tablet of Allerga M (Montelukast 10mg + Fexofenadine 120mg) twice a week. I took Venlafaxine XR for 1.5 years and Allerga M for 2 years and then CT it as all my vestibular migraine symptoms had gone away. When i CT from venlafaxine I did not get any withdrawal symptoms for 9 months. Then after 9 months in June 2022 my vestibular migraine symptoms (swaying, light and sound sensitivity, unstable feeling, surroundings looking dim and blurred vision) came back, I tried to re-introduce Venlafaxine XR again but on taking just one tablet after 9 months my occipital area started paining and i started getting internal trembling inside my body. I still tried taking it the very next day too but had the same issue so stopped taking it and went to the neurologist. The neurologist then tried paroxetine (1 tablet) which didn’t suit me and so he then tried the following medicines -prednisolone (steroid 1 tablet), betahistine (2 tablets), flunarizine (half tablet) and all the above made my condition even worse as she started getting leg jerks while sleeping which i wasn’t getting before with my vestibular migraine symptoms. Then the neurologist finally said lets try Venlafaxine XR again as that has helped me in the past in 2019 and inspite of hearing I was having trouble taking it told me to try it again. Then when I tried Venlafaxine XR again i started getting brain zaps and myoclonic jerks and my stomach and vagina started making loud noises. This had never happened before so i stopped Venlafaxine XR and went back to the neurologist. He then prescribed a Benzo - Alprazolam (1 tablet) which i didn’t feel well on as my heart started racing rapidly and i had chest pain as well so then i went back the next day and he gave me Sodium Valproate (anti epileptic medicine) and told me not to come back and see a psychiatrist. Then that night when i took the sodium valproate tablet a glass breaking sound while swallowing started in my ears and my brain and hip started thumping so i stopped the medicine on 17th August 2022 immediately. Then on 19th August 2022 as i had Covid symptoms especially cough and sore throat i took a cough syrup which was Dilo DX syrup (Chlorpheniramine maleate with Dextromethorphan hydrobromide) 5 ML, this is when my entire symptoms changed for the worse. My occipital area started shaking internally and my vestibular symptoms went away. As I was still having covid symptoms like cough and sore throat she took Lecope AD (Levocetrizine , phenylephrine and ambroxol) - 1 tablet while the shaking in the occipital area still continued. I couldn’t understand what the internal shaking was for a week but as they were not stopping and as per the instructions of the neurologist I finally met with a psychiatrist. I was also exposed to green fungus around the same time in the house as it was rainy season here in Mumbai (India). The psychiatrist ordered an MRI of the brain which was clear. After that i met various psychiatrists and neurologists who said this was Functional or somatic symptoms of depression and they tried to stop the internal shaking or vibrations with the below class of medicines which made my condition even more worse as I was unable to tolerate any medications because my nerves used to pull and pain and my internal shaking/tremors used to increase on taking every medication. I used to then discontinue the medication after 2 to 3 tablets. Below is the class of medications tried on me since August 2022 till date:- (Small doses of each medication was tried and discontinued) YEAR – 2022 · Provanol 20 MG (Propranolol hydrochloride tablets IP) - Half tablet - Beta blocker. · Nexito 5 mg (escitalopram)- Half tablet – SSRI Antidepressant · Provanol 10 MG – (Propranolol hydrochloride tablets IP) Half tablet - 2 days - Beta blocker. · Rejunex CD 3 - Multivitamin · Folinext (Folic Acid and methylcobalamin) - 1 tablet - Vitamin · Homeopathy medicine – GAVE EXTERNAL TREMORS · Zapiz 0.25 mg (clonazepam) Half tablet – 3 days – Benzodiazepine. · Provanol 2.5 mg (Propranolol hydrochloride tablets IP) – 3 days - Beta blocker. · Tynept 12.5 mg (Tianeptine) – Half tablet for 2 days - Dibenzoxazepine Antidepressant · Mirtaz 7.5 mg (Mirtzpine) - Half tablet – Tetracyclic Antidepressant · Synaptol 50 mg (Tolperisone hydrochloride) - Half tablet - Muscle relaxer. · Gabapin 100 mg (Gabapentin tablet IP) - Half tablet - Antiepileptic · Homeopathy medicine · Ayurvedic medicine · Evion - LC - Half tablet (Vitamin) · Solopose - MD 0.25 mg (Etizolam) - Half tablet - Benzodiazepine. YEAR - 2023 · 10th Jan - Ascoril D plus ( Dextromethorphan hydrobromide + phenylephrine hydrochloride + Chlorpheniramine maleate) - 5ML - Took it for dry cough · 11th Jan - Lecope AD ( Levocetrizine , phenylephrine and ambroxol) - 1 tablet for 4 days – Took it for sore throat · 16th Jan - Nurewire Tablet - 1 tablet (Vitamin) · 23rd Jan - Cetzine (cetrizine) - 2.5 MG - Antihistamine · 25th Jan - Pacitane 2 MG – Half tablet (Trihexyphenidyl) - Anticholinergic medication · 27th Jan - Allegra 180 - Half tablet (Fexofenadine) - Antihistamine · 1st Feb to 3rd Feb - Atrest 12.5 mg -Half tablet (Tetrabenazine) – Vesicular Monoamine Transporter 2 inhibitor · 6th & 7th Feb - Benadryl syrup - 2 ML – Cough syrup · 8th & 9th Feb - Supradyn - 1 tablet - Multivitamin · 14th & 15th Feb - Practin syrup 2 ML (Cyproheptadine) - Antihistamines · 18th Feb - Allegra 180 - Half tablet · 21st & 22nd Feb - Mentat (Himalaya Ayurveda) · 28th Feb - Allegra M ( Montelukast 10mg + Fexofenadine 120mg) – Half tablet Leukotriene antagonist and antiallergic medicine · 2nd & 3rd March - Atarax 5 mg - Half tablet (Hydroxyzine) - Antihistaminic medication · 6th March - Pramipex 0.125 mg - Half tablet (Pramipexole ) - Dopamine agonists · 9th March - 1 CBD Gummy · 10th March - Levocet 2.5 MG (Levocetirizine) - Antihistamine · 11th March - Buspin 2.5 MG (Buspirone) - Anxiolytics · 14th March - Levocet - Half of 2.5 MG · 16th March - Levocet - Half of 2.5 MG · 21st March - Bilagra 3 MG (Bilastine) - Antihistamine · HOSPITALISED on 23rd March to 30th March - Vantaxa 5 MG (Vortioxetine) – Half tablet for 1 day - serotonin modulator and stimulator Antidepressant then Prothaden 25 MG (Dosulepin) – Half tablet for 1 day + quarter tablet for 3 days. - Tricyclic antidepressant · 1st , 3rd , 5th & 7th April - Opiprol 50 MG (Opipramol) – quarter tablet - Tricyclic antidepressant · 8th April to 6th May - Lecope AD ( Levocetrizine , phenylephrine and ambroxol) - Mucolytic, Antihistamines and Nasal decongestants – Took it for Sore throat · 10th May - 1 drop of Rudra Taila (CBD drops) · 15th to 22nd May - Metolar 25 MG - Half tablet (Metoprolol Tartrate tablets IP) - Beta-blockers. · 25th & 26th May - Homeopathy medicine (3 pills) · 13th to 15th June - Homeopathy medicines · 16th to 21st June – Neksium 40 mg ( Esomeprazole tablets I.P ) – 3 tablets – Proton pump inhibitor and Motilium M (Domperidone tablets I.P) – 3 tablets- Dopamine-2 receptor antagonist · 26th June - Homeopathy medicine · 14th July to 22nd July – Oflox 200 MG - Ofloxacin Tablets I.P – Antibiotic · 26th July – Gabawin 25 MG – Quarter Tablet (Pregabalin) – Antiepileptic · 30th July – Deslor 5 mg - Quarter tablet - Desloratadine- Antihistaminic medication · 8th August - Half of Allegra 180 (Fexofenadine) – She takes half tablet of Allegra 180 every 3 days for her hives till date. · 30th August – 1 Meftal spas (Dicyclomine (10mg) & Mefenamic Acid (250mg) Anticholinergic and NSAID · 11th September - Homeopathy medicine + Half of Meftal 500 (Mefenamic Acid) · 3rd & 4th October – Half of Syndopa plus (Levodopa (100mg) + Carbidopa (25mg) - Antiparkinson agent · 6th October - Half of Allegra 180 (Fexofenadine) · 7th October – 1 + ½ Lecope AD (Ambroxol (60mg) + Phenylephrine (5mg) + Levocetirizine (5mg) Mucolytic, Antihistamines and Nasal decongestants – Took it for Sore throat AND 2 tablets of Lanol ER (Paracetamol 650mg) - Analgesic (pain reliever) and anti-pyretic (fever reducer) · 23rd October – 1 tablet of NOW - Saccharomyces Boulardii probiotic – 5 billion CFU · 26th October – 1 tablet of Pan 40 (Pantoprazole Gastro resistant tablets IP ) - Proton pump inhibitor · 27th October - Half of Allegra 180 (Fexofenadine) · 28th October – 1 tablet of Nexpro 40 (Esomeprazole magnesium tablets I.P AND 1/4th tablet of Gastractiv 10mg (DOMPERIDONE) - dopamine antagonist · 29th October - 1 tablet of Nexpro 40 (Esomeprazole magnesium tablets I.P - Proton pump inhibitor (Took for 10 days). My current symptoms since 15 months are:- Internal tremors running from head to toe, involuntary movements, nerves pull and pain on taking any medication, pacing, electrical sensitivity to electronics, tingling in hands and feet, burning of skin, external tremors, pain in my occipital area and neck, pulsating at the base of the head which goes down to my entire body. The neurologists did various tests like MRI of cervical spine, F DOPA PET Scan – Brain, Various blood tests, Whole Genome Sequencing (Genetic testing) and all were clear.They then officially diagnosed me with Functional Neurological Disorder (conversion disorder). Currently I can barely walk and im homebound for 15 months now. I currently take only my thyroid medication which is Thyroxine 112 mcg every morning before breakfast – 1 tablet and half tablet of Allegra 180 MG (fexofenadine) – once a week for Hives. The diagnosis that I have received from most neurologist and psychiatrist is that I have Functional neurological disorder (conversion disorder) or Depression and my symptoms are somatic. But I feel this could Kindling or Akathisia or Serotonin syndrome or Mast cell activation or Mold or Long Covid or Withdrawal from the rapid trial and error of medicines but no doctor is ready to help me or give me clarity as to what is wrong with me and why no medication is working on my body? I have tried counselling, EMDR, CBT, DBT, Physiotherapy, ayurvedic, homeopathy and every allopathy medicine possible but my condition doesn’t improve and im really suffering with the physical symptoms especially internal shaking/tremors. I have no idea what has gone wrong and no doctors in India help and they all have put their hands up. Currently no medication/ supplements works on my body and only makes my condition worse. Can someone please tell me what exactly am i suffering from? And is there any cure? I feel helpless and lost as as I have tried everything in my reach and my condition is getting worse day by day. Please Help and Guide me. Thank you so much in advance.

Hi all, I have been meaning to update here for some time now. I was thinking recently about my very early cold-turkey withdrawal and how I would read and re-read recovery stories or hunt for sun symbols within member's journals for hours because I was so desperate for any accounts of improvement and healing. I hope this gives people who are having a very difficult time a bit of hope. I stopped Paroxetine cold-turkey while on holiday in Rome in 2015 - I was feeling fatigued all of the time, having long naps everyday. I felt my emotional responses were blunted but I also had a strange edgy feeling much of the time - something felt 'off' and I had a sense it was the tablets so I naively just stopped taking them. About five days or so later withdrawal symptoms set in and I was very unwell, I ended up in A&E with heart irregularities. Predictably I was prescribed more medications (including diazepam) and I think people around me assumed I was having some kind of breakdown and the symptoms with my heart were the result of panic attacks. I felt conflicted because what I was experiencing - the combination of physical and mental symptoms were so bizarre and far reaching. So I started researching and found myself here - thank goodness for this forum and for the hard work Alto and the moderators put into it. It was such a lifeline. But coming to understand the phenomenon of withdrawal, the uncertainty of a recovery time frame and how dismissive health professionals are was devastating. I spent a great deal of wasted time trying to figure out a way to 'fix it'. I went to see Dr David Healy in Wales and his main advice was to exercise - which I did do and I found it helped me but I know that isn't the case for everyone. I experienced depersonalisation, an impact on my ability to sleep, neuro emotions, intrusive thoughts, physical jerks. heart irregularities, weight loss, issues with my skin and severe brain fog/memory issues. The early part of my withdrawal is somewhat haunting and blurry at the same time, it was incredibly difficult and I felt a need to contain everything because I was so worried people thought I was coconuts. I had graduated from uni a year previously and was having a break because I had been battling with anorexia for years and wanted to focus on overcoming that, so I didn't have a job to get to, I didn't have children to look after. Hats off to anyone who has to navigate these things in the throes of withdrawal. I spent a lot of time reading. It had always been something I retreated to and my mind would race and I would keep forgetting what I had read but I would just keep returning to it, it was almost like a meditative practice. I also tried to do crosswords and codebreakers and exercised, I spent a lot of time with my parent's dogs. Withdrawal pulled me out of my eating disorder. I was already underweight and lost more and more to the point where people stared at me when I went out. Having these symptoms thrust upon me made starving myself seem so ridiculous. Over time symptoms peeled away, withdrawal felt less and less like an enormous shadow looming over me. I had and still have some anxiety about how I am not the same post-withdrawal in various ways and I am not as capable etc etc. I still struggle with brain fog at times and I still have memory issues which at times can be incredibly frustrating and embarrassing. But the whole experience demanded strength and perseverance and patience and it's given me such a sense of resilience. So trust that it gets better, much better. I am hopeful my remaining issues will eventually improve. Hang in there. Sadie.

Hello all, I'll start this off with an introduction on how I got here. Back in September 2020 I was driven to the ER for what I now know was a panic attack (heart racing, blurry vision, dizziness, etc.). I saw a neurologist at the ER, whom I followed up with shortly after in October 2020. The neurologist took one look at me, told me I was anxious, and sent me out the door with a prescription for 10mg Lexapro (which is unfortunately far too common). I started taking this on 10/20/2021. The first week on this seemed to amplify all anxious symptoms, but then surprisingly made me feel great (calmer, more energized, optimistic, etc.). I didn't ask questions as I was fairly naive at the time and trusted the neurologist's decision. A few months in I started experiencing days of extreme fatigue, and random bouts of dizziness/blurred vision. I managed to ignore these and attributed them to migraines. Fast forward to February 2021. The days of fatigue and random bouts of dizziness/blurred vision are still happening, yet more frequently. I also noticed a general sense of feeling numb, as if things did not matter as much. I remember one day I forgot to take my dose (for the first time) and I made it until about noon at work. Symptoms were extreme fatigue, dizziness, head pressure, racing heart and a few more that I can't remember. Once again, I was naive and still didn't consider Lexapro as the issue. The next day I took my normal dose and everything returned back to normal. It's now March 2021. For some reason I decided to start questioning the efficacy of the Lexapro as I was starting to have anxious symptoms yet again. I also had a profound realization that I had become dependent on this drug to function day-to-day in order to "manage" my anxiety, and would be for the rest of my life. This is when I began my research (engineer by trade, heavily science/statistically driven), and to say I was shocked is an understatement. SSRI's are prescribed based on a theory, there is no scientific evidence that has proved SSRI's do what they are intended to do. The primary driver is anecdotal evidence, which absolutely blew my mind (once again, engineering perspective). I'm sure these drugs are helpful to some people, but oh my is this interesting. Journalist Robert Whitaker summarizes the history/efficacy of psychiatric drugs brilliantly, check him out if you haven't already. I was aware of 'potential' withdrawal symptoms through brief internet research (unfortunately did not find SA until 3 months off), was willing to tough it out for a few weeks and I quit cold turkey on March 4th 2021. As many of you have unfortunately experienced, nothing could have prepared me for what would happen during the coming months. The acute withdrawal phase hit almost immediately, parking me in bed for a few days followed by another week of dragging myself around. Over the next few weeks I had the typical symptoms: brain zaps, extreme fatigue, dizziness, headaches/head pressure, chest pain, muscle aches, panic attacks, and many many more. At the end of March I began to feel fairly normal and could function enough to return to daily activities. Fast forward to June 2021 and I got absolutely slammed with withdrawal symptoms. The mental/psychological symptoms were intense and frightening as the only psychological issues I have had in the past was anxiety. These consisted of: intrusive thoughts, DP/DR, OCD, insomnia, depression, extreme anxiety (way worse than pre-lexapro), anhedonia and some more I can't remember. Physical symptoms were: DIZZINESS (this was by far my worst physical symptom), tinnitus, extreme fatigue, migraines, neck stiffness, pins/needles, light sensitivity, chest pain, and just about every other symptoms you've read about. I have been to almost every doctor/specialist you could think of and according to modern medicine I was the 'healthiest person' they've seen. I had started to lose faith in modern medicine and begun to look for solutions myself..... Then I found SA and everything made sense. I have been reading many of the stories here (mostly success ) and I cannot thank the people here enough for the information/hope that is provided. Anyway, here I am 7+ months after quitting Lexapro cold turkey. I have been in the windows/waves pattern for the past 4 months with noticeable improvements. I was actually debating on posting a success story last week because I had been feeling so great, but unfortunately a wave hit - although minor in comparison to the beginning. This has consisted of insomnia, intrusive thoughts, minor DP/DR, light sensitivity and generally feeling out of it. So that's about it. I will continue to update this post accordingly as time goes on, and eventually will post my success story. Cheers, - Seer

Hello together, I have been reading in this forum for a couple of months now. I would like to introduce myself and share my story. I am 31 years old, female and from Germany. In March 2022 I started to take 900 mg St. John's Wort to treat something that I think was a burnout. I got those pills without a prescription in the pharmacy and the leaflet said that those pills are a natural alternative to antidepressants and that they are not addictive. Therefore you could stop the treatment anytime. If I would have known what happened to me because of those pills I would never have taken them. Shortly after starting the pills I didn't feel well. I got bad headaches and felt "different". Therefore I stopped taking the pills after 3 or 4 weeks. After quitting the pills I felt even worse. I couldn't sleep, I had brain zaps (didn't know what that is back then) and I had severe psychological symptoms. My boyfriend took me to the hospital (emergency psychiatry) because we didn't understand what was going on with me. The doctor prescribed citalopram which I fortunately never took. In the next couple of weeks I saw a psychologist and a psychiatrist and started and stopped the st. John's Wort pills at least two more times. Every time I started the pills I got horrible side effects and every time I stopped them I thought I was losing my mind. None of the specialists I saw told me anything about antidepressant withdrawal. Somehow I came across the term antidepressant withdrawal on the internet and I finally understood what was going on. I pretty much had every symptom on that list. In the next couple of months I tried to taper the pills. But I think the damage was already done from quitting them cold turkey a couple of times before. Every time I reduced I got horrible withdrawal symptoms. On October 27 I decided to quit completely and I took my last dose of St. John's Wort. Since the end of October I suffered from various ever changing withdrawal symptoms. Even though I know I am still far from healing I do feel as if things are finally getting a bit better. My main symptoms right now (month 10 after quitting): -Hangover feeling in the morning -Vertigo -Weird feelings in my head (I call it withdrawal headaches) -depersonalization -loss of appetite Triggers: Stress, a lot of noise or light, working on the computer, coffee, alcohol I do get windows. But I still have symptoms pretty much every day and often withdrawal hits me from one second to the next. I feel like the psychological symptoms like anxiety and chemical depression got a lot better in the last couple of weeks. Thank you for reading. I will keep you updated.

Hi sorry for my poor english i'am suffering from nerve pain after I CT prozac and abilify I took them for almost 3,5 weeks I was on ativan from 9-11 2023 0.5-1mg Clonazepam 11-1 0.5mg tappering for 0.25 for month and i am on 0,25 from 2 month olanzapine 10m g 2 weeks in 12 2023 then abilify 10 days 10 mg 7 days ablifiy 5 mg and stopped at 13/12/2023 beacuse TD started Prozac 20 for 3.5 weeks and ct in 16/12 /2023 mild withdrawal then In 2/2 2024 My body started tingiling only when move then day after day pain is increased now it like fire ants 24/7 is it from prozac, abilify or clonazepam i was on 0.25 clonazepam for 3 weeks before it started and there was no thing

Hello My name is Kieran. I hope to receive some support/advice regarding symptoms related to taking SSRI medication over a number of years. Here’s a quick history - 2007-08 - I started taking Prozac at the age of 25 due to recurrent feelings of anxiety, depression which started in early teens. Initially the drug felt like a miracle - I felt a kind of inner wellbeing which I don’t think I’d ever experienced before. Early 2008 - I tried to stop the meds and hit crisis while teaching English in Japan. Withdrawal symptoms? I started taking paroxetine, which again, helped a lot. Due to concerns about the meds which I had read in the UK press, I switched to citalopram in about 2009/10, which I took for about 2 years. I had a breakdown in 2011, and with a psychiatrist’s intervention, I started taking Prozac again. In 2015, after another difficult spell with my mental health, I spent two weeks receiving treatment in a private hospital in London and started taking 50mg of Sertraline. Continued this until 2019, when, after getting a better understanding of my childhood traumas which contributed to my mental health issues, as well as attending Adult Child of Alcoholic meetings ACA, I decided to switch back to Prozac with the hope of one day stopping the medication, having heard that Prozac’s long half would make it easier to taper. The efficacy of the medication had also diminished as my body became used to the drug. Just found out the technical term for this is tachyphylaxis! Retrospectively perhaps unwisely, I started tapering during the Covid lockdowns. I experienced lots of symptoms during this time, really acute anxiety,hyper-vigilance, depression, crying spells , mood swings, intense anger/sadness etc. I spoke to a GP and wasn’t able to be prescribed Prozac liquid to enable me to taper more gradually. i started to take one capsule every week, then two weeks. During this time I experienced persistent stomach pain, and wonder in hindsight whether it had something to do with serotonin receptors in the stomach. From about early 2022 I also started to experience frequent leg pain. In a state of frustration/ crisis in the summer of 2022 I decided to stop the drug altogether. Leg pains increased dramatically to the point of being continually quite severe, either at rest, when walking and at night in bed. By Christmas I was experiencing continued dizziness when walking and a feeling of being spaced out. My mental health was increasingly poor at this point with the symptoms of anxiety/depression ramping up. I was increasingly agoraphobic. I started to become fixated on my physical symptoms and didn’t make the correlation with antidepressant withdrawal at this point. I went to A&E several times this year as I had no idea what was causing my symptoms and I was deeply concerned there was something seriously wrong. This reached crisis in May this year, when I started to experience worsening erectile function over a number of weeks, which eventually resulted in complete loss of sensation entirely. My life has been really compromised by symptoms of CPTSD and I feel I’ve missed out on life. I’ve not been able to work or be in a relationship for many years and the erectile issues sent me into a state of complete breakdown/agitation. I ended up spending several days in hospital, and, you guessed it, in a state of crisis, I went back on the medication. It’s now that the insidious nature of these drugs started to make sense. Some, if not fully recovered, erectile function returned immediately, the leg pains eased considerably. I think the doctors I’d seen thought I was making up my symptoms as checks showed there was no physical cause. Now I understood clearly that this was iatrogenic harm. My relationship with meds is so ambivalent now. Reinstatement brought with it nausea, persistent constipation (a symptom I hadn’t experienced before) and a general feeling of being drugged. I haven’t taken the meds regularly since reintroducing. In the last few days I have started to experience gradually worsening erectile function again, which I’m finding very concerning. I really don’t know what to do and feel my GP won’t understand my predicament as they’re part of a system invested in prescribing medication. My mental health is quite precarious right now and the idea of being ‘neutered’ to all intents and purposes with PSSD is not a predicament I can easily deal with. I’m worried that, having stopped the drug, my body has responded to the absence of meds and my brain and body has been irrevocably altered. Do I bite the bullet and take more meds, do I accept the situation and withdraw? Should I talk to a psychiatrist? I feel they won’t understand my situation and will push drugs. I’m not sure what to do and would appreciate help and guidance. Many thanks Kieran

My brain going into dream condition but not into sleep condition every night or day when ever I attempt to sleep I have believed the information about remote neural monitoring in all over internet and browsed internet 2 years heavily which resulted heavy thought process ,doubts and suspicion over near and dear. So I went to a psychiatrist and requested to bring me out of heavy thoughts.He made me use lorazepam for 10 days ,risperidone and trihexyphenidyl combination drug for 30 days.After 30 days my thoughts reduced so I did not go to doctor again.What a mistake ,I was ignorant of how psychiatry medicines work and slow tapering nor my doctor warned me while prescribing an anti psychotic.It is happened in july 2016. From then my brain going into dreams when ever I attempt to sleep.In october 2016 again I went to the same doctor and reported about the condition I am in.He prescribed olanzapine silently.I started using olanzapine ignorantly and innocently.When i was experiencing stomach upset that is when I researched in the internet about risperidone and olanzapine. Now this is june 2017 I have tapered risperidone and olanzapine safely and became drug free safely.But the thing is my brain still into dream condition and not allowing me to sleep when ever i attempt.My querry is what risperidone and trihexyphenidyl and lorazapam [10 days]did to my brain?what chemicals they blocked.Now stopping them cold turkey did what on my brain?what chemical i should take to get my sleep pattern back.?If I wait patiently with time will the brain correct its condition naturally?Any brain researcher please help.

Hello I took a antidepressant called sertraline for 3 months at 50 mg.Although it made me feel better I had to come off it as the change in brands was making my mental health deteriorate badly and I could not be guaranteed a steady supply from the same brand.I have come off the medication and have experienced horrific symptoms which I presume to be withdrawal which I didn't even have before taking the sertraline and these symptoms include severe anxiety, anger,rage,electric shocks and brain zaps,body being jolted, really bad low mood and this has gone on for 11 months after I stopped which is shocking.Gp's in England do not seem to be aware how bad antidepressants can be. I would like to ask if any people from England are going through withdrawals from antidepressants as Gp's deny withdrawal, and whether there are any private doctors or Gp's who believe in antidepressant withdrawal and could maybe give a diagnosis.Does England even have any support or services for antidepressant withdrawal? Thanks

Hi friends... When SSRI's came into my life, they saved me. Through most of my life (teens and twenties) I had successfully lived with my mental health struggles using tools such as exercise, time outdoors, and an ever changing and stimulating lifestyle as one has during this time of their life. When I moved in my early 30s, completely upending my life as I had never lived anywhere else, I was no longer able to deal with the depths my depression took me to. After failing to find relief from Wellbutrin, I reluctantly decided to try Lexapro. It truly saved me when I was at my lowest point until then. I knew about some of the side effects, weight gain, lower libido, which is why I hesitated. But, as I was no longer functioning, something needed to change. And, it did. What I did not know, was how horrific it was going to be to try to get back off of this drug. I understand myself better now, and I've created an environment in my life that should help me to thrive. But then there is this drug. It is like a veil. More subtle than the depression was, but still something that keeps me from living fully. It keeps me from feeling fully. In 2019, I was ready to come off of the drug. With a new psychiatrist (not the one who initially prescribed SSRI to me), I expressed that I was ready to come off of Lexapro. She told me to cut the dose in half for a few weeks, then in half again, then for a few more weeks, then I would be off the medication. After 5 days at half dose, I was having flu-like symptoms, crying whenever I moved more intensely than a walk, not sleeping....it was too much. I told my doctor and she said to go back to the full dose and we could try again slower at a later time. Then, she retired, and I moved to help my Mom go through cancer treatment. Not a good time to remove your antidepressant. In April 2023, my Mom went into remission, I had the best job, I lived in a place that was good for my soul, and I had so much support around me that I was ready to try again. I did not have a new doctor by now to support me, but I had learned the first time that I needed to slow the tapering process down. I thought I could do it. I reduced my dose by only 25% for 2 weeks, then again to half dose for 1 day. After not sleeping for 4 consecutive nights in a row in addition to the previous WD symptoms I had the first time, I went back to full dose. I was angry and sad. I felt like I had no control and my inability to come off the drug made me want to come off it even more. Why don't doctors tell you about this before they put you on it???? Yes, I've gained weight, my sex life has suffered, but not being able to stop taking this little pill is appalling. I didn't sign up to be dependent on a life-numbing drug for my entire lifetime!@@ My Mom did pass away this last year. The last thing I've needed since April is to take away this crutch when my heart has been more broken than it ever has before. But I am healing, and I think part of that healing process is to take back full ownership and control over my mind and body by getting off Lexapro. I have a two new doctors who are going to support me through this, and I have this site!!! I am so incredibly thankful for the resources and stories about people's journeys going through the same process I will. Thank you all SO MUCH for this site. My new doctors have prescribed me some additional psychoactive drugs to support this process: Lamotrigine and Bupropion. I am taking these to help alleviate WD symptoms from tapering off Lexapro, but I am very anxious about becoming dependent on these as well. My goal is to come off all psychoactive drugs to see where I am in navigating my mental health without chemical support. We will see...

I have a long history of anxiety, was on chlorpromazine and diazepam as a teenager; I'm now 67. Developed OCD in 1970s. Drug-free till 1990s. Developed CFS in 1986, OCD worsened and developed depression over the next 5 years. Prozac from 1991 till 1994, helped to some extent, then OCD worsened again. Switched to dosulepin in 1994, then to clomipramine on the advice of a clinical psychologist in July 1994. Helped a little with the OCD, but to everyone's surprise helped a lot with the CFS. Have been on clomipramine since then, doses from 25 to 125 mg - mostly between 50 and 100mg. The OCD resolved in 1997 after various non-drug therapies, but have continued with the clomipramine because it helped the CFS - usually a dose increase would help after a setback. Since about 2005 the doses my GP allowed did not help the CFS.....tried citalopram in 2007, no better and had a nasty reaction 4 weeks after stopping the clomipramine/starting citalopram - extreme anxiety and uncontrollable shaking. At the time, scared it might be serotonin syndrome - the citalopram had just started to "kick in" - but maybe it was clomipramine withdrawal. Tried dosulepin again in mid 2007 - that made me anxious and did not help the CFS, so switched back to clomipramine. I would like to reduce it.....currently having supply problems in the UK as some manufacturers have stopped producing it, and the constipation is really getting me down. I'm currently on 50mg/day, but my GP and I are talking about reducing it....not sure it's helping any more (the CFS is greatly improved these days, irrespective of clomipramine dose), and would like to find out if I can cope without it.

Hi there. I joined last year, but this is my first post. I'm not really sure what I hope to achieve here. Sometimes I feel so alone in this. Sometimes I just want to yell from the rooftops, warning people to stay away from Paxil. I guess this post stems from both of those statements. A little of my story- I moved to QC, Canada when I met my wife in 2002. Married quite quickly after meeting. Coming from the US, I was definitely not prepared or knew what I was in for, with a move 500 miles away to another country. Especially when it's a country within a country, so to speak, as Quebec can often be seen. Extremely long and winding story short - I became a very different person, within the first five years or so. So much I can point to now, as the catalysts for my becoming a shell of a man. I think it was mostly a perfect storm of childhood traumas, harmful paths as a young man, and high stress life circumstances as a young married man. I can honestly say my wife was not the problem. I was. But I didn't see it that way, at the time. After five years in, my wife told me she thought I needed to see a doctor. That I "needed" to be on medicine. That since my mom had mental health issues, depression etc., it ran in my family. That it was a chemical imbalance. When you break your arm, you go to the doctor, and they fix you. It's the same with mental health. These are things I completely reject now, but at the time, I needed to do something. I was becoming someone I didn't recognize anymore. Aggressive, depressed, anxiety ridden... You can't imagine how I wish I could go back to that point in time. The moment I pulled my car up to the medical clinic. I wish I could go back and tell younger me, that it was the circumstances in my life that needed to change. It was the healing I needed to do. It was the therapy I needed to seek out. Instead, I sought out a drug to "fix" me. And on top of that, one of the worst drugs in the ssri family you could possibly take. One of the hardest to get off of. One with the worst side effects. One that would change my life... But not for the better. I went into a clinic and had a seven-minute conversation with a GP that obviously was there at a drop-in clinic for some extra side cash. "Do you feel down?" Yes, I said. "Do you lash out?" Yes. "Does your mother take any anti-depressants?" Yes. "Here's a prescription". I'll sum up my years on Paroxetine. It gave me all the typical side effects, but it seemed to help with my anxiety. It did not make me feel happy. It did, however, seem to blunt my emotions. Which I suppose could be interpreted as "helping" with being depressed. Over the years, I'd start feeling confused as to why I'm not feeling happy. Why I'm still having moments of lashing out. Why I can't seem to click into life the way I see others can. Just always feeling like something was just wrong with me. So, I went back, upped the dose a couple times. Over the years, I tried to get off of it. The very first time, was cold turkey. I was NEVER told by the doctor about ANY negative side effects, and that coming OFF of Paxil can be difficult. I knew nothing of tapering, withdraw, discontinuation syndrome... None of it. I remember having the extreme zaps, the suicidal ideations... I went back on. I tried to get off a few other times and couldn't ever do it. I've been off of Paxil for about half a year. I'm definitely experiencing withdraw. I'm so thankful I'm off of it though. Because I know what I lost while on it. I've come to realize that so much of my impulsive behaviors, risky behaviors, emotional indifference can be traced back to being on Paxil. I went from a man with a wife, three kids, to currently alone. I've lost it all. The things I've done, and said, and thought over the years are unfathomable to me now. It's as if I've awoken from a nightmare. And I don't mean that figuratively. I mean it literally feels like I'm awake after over a decade of dreaming. I left my wife seven years ago. A woman who stood by me through it all. Who had to suffer alongside a man who became a shell. I did things over the years on Paxil, that when I think of now, makes me actually ill. I can't believe the person I was. I can't believe the decisions I made. I can't believe how numb and callused I was towards her, my kids, and really my own life and self. Basically, what I've realized, is that Paxil did nothing to "fix" me. All the problems that weighed on me and my heart/mind/soul, never went away. I just was able to numb myself a little more towards them. Sometimes now drug-free, a memory will pop up and I'll see it and feel it in a completely different way than I did at the time. It's hard to explain. It's like I think about my life and see a movie played out, by an actor that looks like me, but isn't me. I'm angry. Angry at Paxil, angry at that doctor... I feel I've lost years and years of my life. Years I won't get back. But alongside that anger, I have empathy. Empathy for myself. I'm trying to balance guilt and sadness, with empathy and hope. I'm in the process of working this all out. Maybe someday I will have my family together again, intact, by the grace of God and clear mind. I've talked with her about a lot of this, and she seems to understand how these brain and body altering drugs can play a part in the downfall of a person. Discovering Dr Roger Mcfillin, and many others has been a game changer for me, personally. Also moving towards God and His grace and forgiveness. Redemption. Things I never cared about really, and eye rolled over. For those of you who have lost during your time on one of these drugs- I know how you feel. We must take responsibility for our actions and life choices, but to deny that Paxil didn't have a role in this for ME, would be a gross mistake. I'll post more as I continue this journey in healing. As I said, I am experiencing prolonged withdraw, and I'll share more another time. Love to you all. Have hope.

Hello! I am a 22 year old woman who was first prescribed 10mg of Celexa in January 2022, then 20mg in March 2022. I had never had any issues with anxiety or depression, but at the time was in the midst of an Adderall addiction that had left me with depressive comedowns to the point of suicidal ideation. I ultimately said goodbye to Adderall in March 2023 and went cold-turkey without any lingering side effects. I continued to take 20mg Celexa daily until the end of April, when I realized that the medication was numbing my emotions and curbing my anxiety to the point that I felt no urgency over anything. My prescriber's instructions for tapering, I have learned, were much too fast – I cut from 20mg to 10mg at the end of April, and held there for a month before cutting from 10mg to 0mg over the course of June/July. My last dose of Celexa was on July 9th. Symptoms of withdrawal were noticeable shortly thereafter, but have really peaked over the past 2 weeks. I had severe gastrointestinal side effects (took laxatives for 10 days straight), feelings of depersonalization and dizziness, difficulty staying asleep, elevated heart rate, and severe episodes of hopelessness and lack of motivation. I decided to reinstate 2.5mg as of Saturday, which resolved my gastrointestinal issues but otherwise has not made a significant difference yet in terms of mental stability. I am not sure where to go from here – I plan to meet with a new psychiatrist this week, but this has been the most difficult thing I have ever encountered. Curious if anyone has had a similar experience, has any recommendations, or even just words of support. I am so desperate for my life back. Thank you so much.

Hi, I am new here and terrified. Was prescribed low dosage TCAs for 2.5 years. Nortriptyline 20-30 mg from May 2012 - Dec 2013. Then desipramine from Jan 2014 - October 2014. In October, my neck and tongue started twitching. I'd been having muscle tremors since about May, but my stupid doctor couldn't ever tell me what it was. I finally looked at the side effects of the desipramine and put two and two together and quickly tapered down. I was told that was okay since I was on such low dose. Was actually told it would have been okay to abruptly stop since the dosage was low. In hindsight, I now suspect that some muscle stuff I noticed on nortriptyline were actually side effects. Now it looks like I have tardive dyskenisia, which is apparently rare from TCAs. Please, will I recover? Has anybody on here recovered from TCA-induced TD? I see that people have recovered from TD from other classes of meds. Looking for hope about my situation. It is apparently so rare with TCAs that I can't find info and I want a full recovery. Please note: meds were prescribed for pain, not mental health.

I thought I'd write something up for the CT/ADR crew, as those who are tapering are often able to manage their symptoms well through a gradual hyperbolic taper. For those of us cast out to sea, so to speak, and with no choice but to endure suffering, I think the only thing we have control over is our attitudes and our relationship to what we're experiencing. This means that though we have no choice over what we experience, we have the power to decide whether we suffer it. I may only be 30 days into my ADR experience, but I think given the intensity of my symptoms I've done remarkably well. Part of the reason that's the case is that I'm already well versed at managing suffering by virtue of struggling with CPTSD. One of the most helpful resources I found in my trauma recovery has been Pete Walker's 13 Steps for Flashback Management. I feel Pete's strategies could similarly be helpful for those suffering symptoms from Withdrawal/ADR. CPTSD flashbacks often resemble Withdrawal/ADR symptoms in their overwhelming and intense quality, and are similarly difficult to assign meaning to. Pete's steps help people to endure and manage their suffering, and support people to develop a healing attitude towards a complex and often lifelong syndrome. So here I present to you, adapted directly from Pete's steps, Scrountz's 10 Steps for Managing Withdrawal/ADR Symptoms: 1. Say to yourself: "I am experiencing a symptom." Its important when symptoms arise to name them what they are. When in a wave it is easy to lose perspective and believe that what we are experiencing is a sign that we are going crazy, mentally ill, that our brains are broken, or that we are dying. Symptoms are not characterological defects, nor are they signs of a deeper problem. Symptoms are time limited experiences that will gradually resolve. When you name what you are experience as a symptom, you are reinforcing what is real. 2. Remind yourself: "I would not be feeling this way if it was not for the medication." Withdrawal/ADR symptoms are compelling and have a tendency to pull us in to a unique physiological reality characterized by interminable suffering. Neuro-emotions, ruminating thoughts, and unrelenting physical ailments feel so real it is sometimes hard to believe that we are experiencing is drug induced. Falling into this pit can send us into a spiral of googling symptoms, experimenting with remedies and endlessly theorizing about our condition. Reminding ourselves that it is the medication (or for withdrawal, its absence) that is causing this experience grounds us in the appropriate context for recovery. When we remind ourselves it is the medication, we open the door to taking the right action to promote recovery. 3. Own your right and need to have boundaries Remind yourself that you are injured, and have a right to do what is necessary to heal. Respectfully communicate to others when you are distressed/overwhelmed/debilitated and need space or freedom from responsibilities that may burden your already over-sensitized nervous system. Own your right to take care of yourself and put your wellness first. Remove or reduce distressing factors in your environment and focus on finding a space for you that is safe and conducive to healing. Remember you are free to leave overstimulating situations and to protect yourself from the dismissive behaviour of others. 4. Seek reassurance When symptoms arise, they can be incredibly distressing and debilitating. Many people in withdrawal feel as though their lives are ruined and they may never feel better again. Seek reassurance from loved ones and compassionate others to remind you that you will heal in time. Call your parents, talk to your spouse, connect with your counsellor, or phone a friend. Journal in your introductory topic or reach out to other members of this forum. Find whoever you can to reassure you things will get better. Often just hearing that from someone else is enough to provide some strength to keep going. 5. Deconstruct eternity thinking Withdrawal/ADR symptoms are incredibly compelling. Often when a wave of symptoms arises, one feels they will always feel this way forever. I know for me, when a wave of depression hits, I have a hard time believing it won’t last forever. The reality is that symptoms change over time. Recovery follows an unpredictable course, yet no feeling is final. Waves will always end eventually. Remind yourself that symptoms are not forever, and you will feel differently eventually. Symptom journals can be incredibly helpful in this regard, as when eternity thinking sets in, you can revisit past journals to see how your experience has changed over time. 6. Remind yourself of the resources you have While time is the only factor that truly resolves Withdrawal/ADR symptoms, there are numerous resources available to help with coping and reducing symptom severity. When distressing symptoms arise, remind yourself of the resources you have to cope. It can be helpful to make a list of the things you find helpful in managing symptoms (for me it's talking with loved ones, journaling, Qigong, Acknowledge/Accept/Float, CBT exercises). In withdrawal/ADR, you are out of control but you are not powerless. There are ways to increase comfort and help manage your experience. 7. Ease back into your body (this is copied verbatim from Pete’s flashback management as it is just as applicable to us) Gently ask your body to relax: Feel each of your major muscle groups and softly encourage them to relax. (Tight muscles send unnecessary danger signals to the brain.) Breathe deeply and slowly. (Holding the breath also signals danger). Slow down. (Rushing presses the psyche's panic button.) Find a safe place to unwind and soothe yourself. Wrap yourself in a blanket, hold a stuffed animal, lie down in a bath, take a nap Feel the fear in your body without reacting to it. Fear is just an energy in your body that cannot hurt you if you do not run from it or react self-destructively to it. 8. Resist drasticizing and catastrophizing Withdrawal/ADR symptoms throw us into a state of high distress, where it is easy to begin catastrophizing (believing the world is ending) and drasticizing (believing that something needs an immediate and severe response). It’s important to forcefully resist this, as this kind of thinking only serves to increase distress and reinforce the notion that recovery is not possible. Use whatever strength you can to push back against this thinking, reminding yourself that symptoms are not life threatening, and that this is not forever. CBT techniques that challenge catastrophic thinking are particularly helpful in managing this dimension of symptoms. 9. Allow yourself to grieve Withdrawal/ADR can be a debilitating, life altering experience that has robbed some of us years of wellness and prosperity. For many the loss of a sense of safety and trust in the medical system leaves one feeling existentially exposed. The symptoms of withdrawal/ADR can impact our relationships, sense of self and life direction. It is important to leave space to express the healthy feelings that come up as a result of this demoralizing, often traumatic experience. Pain, sadness, anger, despair and anguish all have a place in the recovery process. Give yourself permission to express whatever feelings are present in relation to the inevitable loss that withdrawal. 10. Be patient with a slow recovery process I was sobered when I read on this site that recovery takes longer than you’d like. The truth of iatrogenic injury is that there is no clear timeline for anyone’s recovery process. Everyone experiences a unique healing trajectory, with some going very slowly and others experiencing more rapid progress. Whatever the pace, it is important to be patient. You simply cannot rush your healing. Most of us will be at this for months or years. Raging against this fact only engenders needless suffering. Though in many ways the hardest step, this is the most important, and feeds back positively into the other steps. If you can take things one day at a time, you’re more likely to successfully manage your symptoms as they arise. If you’re fixated on getting well NOW, you’re less likely to do what's actually helpful (see steps 1-9). This list is far from exhaustive. I’d love to hear from the collective wisdom of this forum about other necessary “steps” in coping with hard symptoms.

Hey everyone! I just recently found this site and I think I'm starting to finally have some answers. I was on antidepressants for about 10 years and then went cold turkey when I found out I was pregnant last year February 2023. I was fine for a while when I was pregnant, but then one day I started having major panic attacks, anxiety, and depression. I thought at first it was due to the pregnancy and the hormones and added stress so I just wrote it off as so. I was also having trouble sleeping with sensitivity to light and sound and waking up every couple of hours or so, which I also attributed to the pregnancy. I had my baby in November 2023 and have had worsening symptoms. Of course, anxiety and depression can come postpartum and so I attributed all of my issues to this and just to the general stress of having the baby and being new at parenting. But now, it is starting to feel like there is something more than just postpartum depression and anxiety. I have been having severe panic attacks and have trouble dealing with my emotions. When I get overwhelmed, my mind just shuts down and doesn't know how to comprehend thoughts or emotions. Could this be linked to a long-term withdrawal from my antidepressants? And if so, is there anything I can do?

Hi everyone, I'm Stanislav, 24 years old and I've been suffering from constant depersonalization/derealization for almost 7 years, triggered by a weed induced panic attack. My symptoms include feeling unreal, confused in the world, racing thoughts, excessive symptom monitoring, memories don't seem like my own, loss of sense of self, apathy, anhedonia, lights are bright and "tunnel vision" (a kind of visual processing problem where I don't seem to percieve all of my FOV at once). Two years later I was curious about medication since my symptoms haven't improved despite cbt therapy and time passing. In January 2020, I went to a psychiatrist, briefly described my situation and he instantly prescribed me Lexapro 10mg, which was supposedly really safe and unproblematic. I started taking it and felt changes in the next months. I cared much less about the intrusive thoughts but also had more anhedonia, was even less prone to laughing, was always feeling a bit tired and it was more difficult to reach orgasm but for me that was fine, since I had issues with premature ejaculation. Anyway, shortly after I met my boyfriend (the light of my life) and I continued the use of Lexapro for 2 years. Often times only taking half a dose, in hindsight it was irresponsible to be doing this. My dpdr symptoms have not improved but they were easier to live with and ignore. I want to emphasize that I didn't have a close connection to my psychiatrist and basically only went there for a new receipt where he asked if everything was fine and I said yes. Having no idea that tapering after prolonged AD use is supposed to be really slow, even though 5mg is the minimal tablet dosage, I quit cold turkey in 2022 for a month from 5mg because it wasn't helping with dpdr, not thinking much of it. I began experiencing great anxiety and depression and wanted to try wellbutrin, which helped for some people. So I was on wellbutrin for 2 weeks and had to quit it because it made me extremely tired and not much else. I then restarted Lexapro 5mg and later went up to 10mg for another 1 1/2 years. It was similar to the first time I took it. Then in January 2023 I decided to get off the drug and really work on my anxiety to recover from dpdr, which had been ruining my inner life. (Outwardly I was doing fine, got a Bachelor's degree in mathematics, while being dissociated 24/7, working on my master's degree right now) Without talking to my psychiatrist, whom I didn't trust that much anyway and he was changing offices too, I quit Lexapro 5mg cold turkey about a year ago. I really did not think much of it. I was really convinced the drug was relatively harmless. Stupid of me, I now know better. My withdrawals started after a week and I suffer them until today, a year later. They're not as bad as some people here have them but they are still debilitating and include: Waking up with and suffering from strong anxiety and incessant racing thoughts and uncontrollable worries, depressed mood, heart beating fast, not being able to breathe in deeply, I also have anhedonia which I had before but now it's worse and I miss laughing. At first I was telling myself it was relapsing or that my dpdr was improving because I was feeling more anxiety, so my emotions were less dampened but just last week the realization hit me that I was not just suffering from dpdr but also from having been on Lexapro. At this point I wish I never took it. The last few days have been especially bad with me not being able to calm myself down and feeling like a hopeless case. The withdrawal symptoms have not improved at all yet. I've been going to the gym for 2 months and I will continue to do so. One thing that sometimes helps is a diaphragmatic breathing meditation, Doing this I can feel the anxiety subside sometimes. I am struggling at work and university but I hope that I will improve in the next year. Do you guys think there is hope for me? I know I ***** up but after a year, I don't want to start taking the drug again to taper it more slowly. I was thinking about doing rTMS for depression and anxiety and I am also in therapy for the last half year. Would appreciate any kind words and thoughts. Cheers

Hi, I took Mirtazapine 15mg for 2 weeks and stopped due to severe side effects. I tried Amitriptyline 20mg, i took it for about 3 weeks but it started making me very dizzy so i stopped. Started Mirtazapine 7.5mg again as it was helping me initially for sleep, but it did not help as before so i stopped it again after 2 weeks. After all this, i came to know that these medications should be wean off or taper gradually. None of the Dr's i saw educate me about it. now i am 3 months off these medications, i get anxiety, restlessness in waves, my sleep is very broken but since last 2 weeks i feel very tired and fatigue even without doing anything. will this pass? is it the part of recovery process? Is there anything i can do about it? Any reccomendations?

Hey, I am almost 20 years old and super new to the world of AD's. I know how complex they are and how unknown they are but also I am no doctor, just a student interested in the medical field and psychology. I have been reading these forms for only a few sleepless nights. Sorry for any grammar mistakes in advance. I am currently taking AD's for my anxiety, which I assume has built over the past couple of years since COVID-19. Had my first panic attack this Jan 15 of 2023 (no great changes in my life which happened around this time) which impacted my sleep. Went to the ER where they said it was a panic attack (blood work, blood pressure, etc only abnormality was slightly high WBC). The next days, I only have symptoms when I am laying down (sudden spike in increased heart rate and lightheadedness). It is very bothersome when I trying to sleep. Always happens when I am about to doze off, I begin to feel dizzy (even though my eyes are closed) and lightheaded) which immediately deletes my drowsiness from existence. Go to doctors which want to give me AD's immediately and therapy but I get suspicious about the AD's and deny them until the next day after I got another sleepless night and took them. I am prescribed 10 mg generic citalopram pill and hydroxyzine 25 mg tablet. Only took the hydroxyzine a couple times before it stopped making me drowsy. I then switched to melatonin for a few times before it made me only drowsy but couldn't sleep. Tried my best to willpower through it for about a week and a half. I was already 1 week late to school and also my job. Feel new symptoms in the day like elevated heart rate (baseline levels slowly increase as the day goes on, reset once I go to bed and rest usually around 80's to 100's RHR), chest pressure and my body reacting to anxiety more than it should (i.e im a little anxious in my head but my body is reacting as if I was super anxious like can't speak or get really sweaty lol) Average sleep was about 0-4 everyday with a couple of 6 hour sleep gaps (used to sleep 8-9 all the time I love sleep). Never had real dreams just half awake fever dreams that were stressful and thoughts but I was mostly conscious the whole time. Went to the ER a couple more times in this week and a half. On my 3rd visit, I had an xray, ultrasound, blood work, and monitored while I had a 1 hour nap. They found nothing noteworthy and my shakiness disappeared after they took blood from me. (normal WBC this time) Seeing the impact my anxiety had on my school and social life, I finally give in and take my first citalopram dose on Jan 29 @9pm (prescribed at bedtime). Jan 30th I get scared and decide to not take them. On Jan 31th I take them and decide to continue taking them to give them a chance. With every pill I feel something in my brain but it isn't a bad feeling. Feb 3rd while having covid fever, I felt my whole body change after taking my dose. I check my heart rate and it finally lowered to normal levels. I was able to sleep this night semi normally. Feel like myself again 100% until feb 6th. I continue taking my dose regularly and monitor myself. I had a MCOT monitor on during this due to my repeated ER visits. Slowly realize that even though I go to bed from 10:30 or 12, I am now semi napping until 3am where (like clockwork) I go to take a piss and then sleep like a baby (and dream) until noon in which I wake up feeling good. This is great except I have classes and meetings before noon all the time. Also I got normal side effects like gassy stomach and brain zaps but I didn't care as long as I slept. Also slight increase in laziness but I was already lazy before so it didn't change much. If I tried to wake up before noon, my body would punish me. One time I woke up at 11am and felt drowsy until 6pm. The next day I went to my psychiatrist for the first time @9am and felt like a zombie for that whole day and the next. During my visit, she said she didn't like how I was prescribed Citalopram as a starter medication because of risk of QT prolongation and at night (said no drowsiness is associated with the drug) and tells me to switch to zoloft (generic) and trazadone for sleep. Originally she thought I didn't need AD's and just needed to sleep but I said that the citalopram was working well but if I had to switch I would like to have both on hand so I don't go back to hell longer than I need to. I am prescribed sertraline generic 25 mg (1/2 pill 50 mg) @morning and trazadone 25 mg (1/2 pill 50 mg) before sleeping. I ask her if its ok to stop my citalopram without slowly tapering and she said it was fine since I was only a few weeks deep. Since I am in zombie mode, I stop citalopram cold turkey but also refrain from taking my new meds since I can sleep and am drowsy all day anyways. (technically for 3 days no meds). On feb 20 in the am morning, I am back to old habits of same old symptoms that didn't go away and came back a little bit worse. I take my trazadone and go to sleep. Wake up at noon and take my sertraline at that time consistently. Felt light headaches for the first couple of days on it. After 5 nights of trazodone, (3 great ones and 2 where I woke up at 3 am) I stop the medication because it made me super constipated and I also had diarrhea (???). On the fourth day of sertraline I notice I have anxiety trembling (which previously I only had while laying down) during the day. I try to calm myself down to no avail and choose to ignore it. My heart rate is slightly lower than normal but I think its just the zoloft doing its thing. This night I slept a beautiful 10 hours. On the fifth day the shaking is worse but now I feel my old anxiety of having to keep myself busy and productive, heart rate still slightly lower though. I try to calm down again and it doesn't work but I am not concerned since my sleep was great the other day. This night I was not so lucky. On the night of February 26th I only get 2 hours of sleep. Before I went to sleep I ate until I realized that I ate so much without feeling hungry or full. I wake up at 2 am feeling really hot and sweaty (room is like 55F tops) then I stay up until 4am tired wanting to sleep. At one point I feel like I blinked really hard and then woke up from feeling like I fell. Can't sleep so I get on my phone and do my research including finding this website. Around 8 am my mom wakes up and I go to talk to her. While she's talking to me, I begin to break down into tears and freeze up and can't talk. After a while of crying, she ends up having to feed me a banana and milk. It works and I calm down feeling like that wasn't me (I was frustrated but not to that point). I begin to wonder if it was my body reacting bad to the zoloft and so I call my psychiatrist and leave her a voicemail. I head to the ER and my psychiatrist responds to me while in the waiting room and everyone basically tells me to drop the zoloft (sertraline) and go back to the celexa(citalopram). I decide to stop cold turkey my sertraline and take my old dose of 10mg of citalopram at 3pm this time. Everyone goes to work and I am home alone. I begin to have waves of fear while reading this site and I get another panic attack. The fear was just as great as before and just as before I just wanted to die so it would end. I called a hotline they gave me which did not help at all and then called my brother which he helped me calm down. I was still shaking and my heart rate was up but I felt ok in my head. I felt like I wasn't in control of my emotions so I went to the psychiatric ER this time. I am told that the sertraline was too low to even have an effect on me and that it was probably caused by dropping the celexa without tapering. There I am given a benzo, trazadone (i think 50 mg), and a place to sleep. I think I slept around 8pm and woke up around 7am felt pretty good. However they gave me a 20mg citalopram to take at 10am even though it wasn't my right dose or time to take it. Anyways that was like today so I am pretty up to date. I still am shaking only in the left half of my body a little bit but I don't feel anxious. If I don't get a response soon I am planning to continue my citalopram 10 mg @3pm like normal. However, I do have many concerns and am hoping I still have hope for my nervous system. If it is appropriate to get these questions answered here, here they are: *what is the predicted state of my nervous system due to my mistakes? *Did I just mess up really bad and like am in the perfect situation for kindling? (reinstated to same full dose a week after dropping and then double dose the next day at different????) *Many of the supposed citalopram withdrawal symptoms happened to line up with sertraline side effects, was it a case of both occurring? *Did I mess up my nervous system by dropping all my meds cold turkey? *If the zoloft wasn't what made my anxiety worse, would it be a good idea to keep citalopram until stable and then slowly taper into sertraline to see if it doesn't force me to sleep and is better? Thank you for your time and support

Hello,this is my story (sorry for my English), Currently suffering a lot and don't have a good supporting system,I feel so alone and lost and don't know if this nightmare will ever end, any help appreciated. 01/2017-12/2022 ~6 Years on Generic Lexapro (5mg-20mg) because of repeataive panic attacks and anxiety that lead to depression.No idea about withdrawal,dr just said that it will be easy to stop them just like I started them .Just I have to do it slowly when I see myself better.My tapering was not tapering as i read here ,I consider it cold turkey because of wrong directionns of docs. I went from 20mg to 5mg in a short time(4-5 month) and and then 0mg. Withdrawal symptoms: 01/23-04/23 Low mood , anxiety at times, high energy, feeling uncomfortable some times.I was feeling that something is not going very well and something is coming but no idea that was from withdrawl as I thought this poison was already out of my system as I was told by doctors. 04/23-07/23 Lot more stress and anxiety, shortness of breath, higher heart rate, balance problem showed, several panic attacks, difficulties focusing, lower productivity at work as my cognitive skills started to go down,pssd.(Thought just ws high stress and anxiety who caused this maybe need some rest ,still no idea about withdrawal.) 07/23-31/09/23 The terror just started,all the above symptoms but in much more extreme which gradually worsened(I took maca for pssd for 4 days in the beginning of 07/23 possibly worsened my symptoms or just what came was supposed to happen ).In the beginning I couldn't talk , couldn't find the easiest words tos say to complete sentences.My cognitive skills just faded away (I was able to understand that because I used to be a good student at uni so I had great pc skills and was a smart guy high grades ) but my mind just stopped to cooperate.All of this gave me a lot ,a lot of stress I thought I was going insane and I just couldn't accept this.I stopped my work temporary for a month because I thought I need some rest because of anxiety i had and I just needed some rest but the worse was coming.My balance problems worsned a lot more ,and just one day I started to have a headache in back of my head ,It was like someone was burning my brain inside.Then everything went worse i started to have headaches in every part of my head , sometimes feel like there is missing part of my brain ,and i feel that parts of my brain are missing sometimes,Very sensitive to louds and sounds in general cand handle everyday sounds I feel paralyzed ,not able to communicate for a long time or focusing in the words someone says ro me because headache starts and just cant handle (it is like it triggers stressors and if i continue to hear or focus in conversations after the pain this goes me to a panic attack )The same happens if i see a vidio for lot of minutes ,feell like my brain is very sensitive maybe due to the fact that i had so much stress about what was happening.I found about this group accidentally as I was in 2psy docs who suggested that i had relapsing and wante ro give me cocktail of other drugs . I suspected that and started the searching on internet.In the beginning i found a group of pssd because this is a problem I have since my CT,and wanted to know about these other drugs they prescribed me ,then I saw @pugsuccess story which lead me to this amazing forum.And reading here about symptoms and everything about withdrawals things started to make sense ,but I was in shock (I found SA0 12/09/23).I didn't started to get these drugs they prescribed me but Im suffering a lot these days.Worth to mention that when my headache started I had a lot of pain on my brain (I thought I was going insane minute to minute )and I wa unable to tolerate it.My family went me In ER and they gave me sth no idea what it was however they told me to take Lyrica(pregbalin) and see how things will go.I took lyrica next day (50mg) and it helped me a lot to be honest my pain reduced and since then I continue it ,but im afraid as it is also addictive and dont know really in this moment it helps or puts more fuel to the fire,but im afraid to take it off because the terror I saw when i went in ER was out of this world.I don't work anymore as I am not able to concentrate on pc and my cognitive impairment is very low . I live with my family this moment as not able to take care by myself but they don't understand me they think that everything is just in my head and they expectthis to pass day by day putting some sort of pressure on me ,also my friends dont understand me,thay just have not ever heard about everything i say so doesn't make sanse ,Im not not able to seee them a lot because I cant handle conversation for lots o minutes with pepople it trigers me that pain in my head .I don't know what to do anymore,I cant go back to ssri the stole my feelings for years ,but im suffering a lot now and 2 month ( 9 months off srri).Apart from the fact that i dont function normally because of my brain I also have lots of stress daily which also cause high heart rate . My worts days are usually I'm bedridden and just a step away to go in ER(lot of pain inside in my soul like is screaming so loudly but only me can hear it , fatigue,not able to communicate, sensitive to light and sound,and dont know if i will make next hour or not).It goes after 6-7 hours some times takes all day and night but freaks me out.Some moments of the day I feel ok but ar less than the waves. My sleep is (4-5 hours per night) except from some days that I was no able to sleep at all .Try to eat 3xday even though some days i don't have appetite.Exerxice whenever Im able and not beddriden usually (30 -50min biking ride or walking/jogging ~8000steps )5/7 days a week . Im trying to fight this but in we deepest waves i feel so bad ,so weak and not imaggine to tolerate this for much time .I don't know if anything i said makes any sense because my symptoms are a little different from others with lexapro.I just want to ask the moderators if is a good idea to continue with lyrica or not? And what is the best thing to do when acute withdrawal hits because I cannot know if there will be strongers acute waves than these who passed just in case to be prepared.Would be a good idea any benzo or any other way either way? Any support and suggestions appreciated. #Thank you for reading my story.🙂

I came off cymbalta 10 months ago after being on them 4 months. Had a bad taper from a prescriber. Bad withdrawals only I didn’t know they were withdrawals. A month later a different prescriber put me on Nortriptylene. That lasted 4 months then I weened off Nortriptylene over four months because it wasn’t helping. I’ve been off the Nortriptylene now for 6 weeks. When getting off the cymbalta my prescriber used Prozac to crossover which didn’t work. The new prescriber kept me on the Prozac while adding Nortriptylene. Im presently on 15mg of Prozac now but having withdrawals from the other two. Prior to this ive have taken Prozac for approximately 13yrs and lexapro for the next 14 years. The last year and a half were the changes to these other drugs. I’ve been on meds for a total of 28 years. I would like to start dropping the Prozac. I’m still feeling depression/anxiety/zaps/fatigue/etc from the withdrawals of the others. I was getting waves and windows pretty equally spaced apart by weeks. 2 weeks on(wave) 2 weeks off (window) After stopping the Nortriptylene it seems the windows are gone and it’s been a rough 6 weeks. Any advise would be great concerning reducing the Prozac? Is there hope after being on meds for 28 yrs to be free of them and healed?

Hello everybody. I was referred to this forum after trying to find answers about my problem on other websites for almost a year now. To somewhat quickly sum up my story. I was put on psych meds at 16 after a breakdown related to OCD. I am not sure how long I have been on Lexapro, but probably since around 2013/2014. I first started taking psych meds at 16. I was dealing with a bad APRN (who I saw for years but became worse and worse over time) who had me on 30mg of Lexapro for at least 2 to 3 years. I cannot remember how long I was on 20mg before that, and for how long. I apologize. I couldn't get a refill due to problems with my computer for an online meeting, they didn't give me enough to taper off safely (didn't even tell me to taper off or warn me about withdrawal symptoms), so I ended up having a breakdown about 3 months later, but not any cognitive issues at all. I was very paranoid and anxious, but my memory was fine along with my memory and ability to talk eloquently. I was put back on 10mg of Lexapro about 2ish weeks after the incident. I remember having a dull pain at the very top of my head for a little bit, and since that week, I've had breathing problems, sinus issues such as dryness and pain (watery mucus too, now my sinuses feel very dry recently), memory loss, brain fog, fatigue, dry mouth, chest pains, face/neck pains and a warm/tingling feeling on the left side of my face (sometimes numbness too), vomiting, throbbing headaches, high blood pressure (this has mainly gone away I think, could have been from withdrawal) jaw stiffness (my teeth would clench subconsciously while awake, that's gone away) and ear ringing. I also now have sleep apnea. I had to immediately stop taking it again due to these issues, I lasted about a week on the new dosage. It almost feels like I had a TBI without having a TBI. I don't know if the SSRI caused it or the stress of the breakdown (was put on a psych hold) and personal family problems such as my mom getting sick with cancer that eventually killed her caused it, or both. I've been feeling like this for about 10ish months now and it's not getting any better. I have sexual dysfunction problems, emotionally I feel numb, and when I try to think deeply it feels like my brain is a stalling car. My memory is also as bad as ever, and the neck/face problems are still here, I can feel them as I'm typing this. It also feels like when I speak to people, my mouth is speaking faster than my brain can think. This is something very new, and it causes me to stutter/not talk as eloquently as I used to. I used to be very well spoken and now that's gone. I can recall events in my life/childhood, but now I can no longer remember specifics of the events, such as words said. It's very odd. I've had CT/MRI scans done of my brain and neither showed real problems. I'm seeing my PCP in September because my problems are getting worse, and I'm supposed to see a neurologist in November, and I'm thinking of asking for a qEEG, SPECT, and a nerve conduction study. I'd just like some advice on what to do to feel better. Not sure if my APRN is liable for the damage done to be or not, either, but this isn't a legal forum, so I'm not expecting any advice on that front. My former APRN, who I had gone to for years, slowly became worse and worse, and got angry at my mom at times for scheduling my appointments with my APRN. When I saw my APRN again after my breakdown/psych hold, she didn't seem to care about me going off 30mg cold turkey, her not telling me to taper off of it or warning me about the problems etc. She just put me back on 10mg, and when I had to stop taking it due to my side effects, she refused to help me any further, saying she would only see me if I saw a therapist, and even when I did, she refused to talk to me about my problems because "legally I [The APRN] can't because [The APRN] doesn't see me as a client anymore". She's the one who won't see me anymore, so I don't get it at all. She was very cold and uncaring about my mom getting sick and dying of cancer, only saying "getting a job helps with anxiety" and "Medicaid is hard to get on". It's so horribly depressing to feel like you've lost what made you, you. My memory is awful, my emotions are all over the place, I stutter sometimes now when I never used to, my cognitive thinking is awful. My voice actually sounds different to me. I don't know what's going on. My personality feels so neutered. I just want some help to get a definite answer on what's causing all of this.

I’m unsure on the right terminology because I’m not sure what I believe anymore so please bear with me. last year after ten years on citalopram I had a sudden relapse in depression and anxiety (you could say I pooped out but who knows). The relapse has crippled me and it’s immeasurably worse than the first time around. It’s consumed me and I feel like I’ve lost my identity. Through this period the doctor changed me to sertraline and again to venlafaxine. Both of which had zero effect. I wanted to look at exploring more naturalistic remedies (not sure how appropriate it is to discuss this on this format so I will leave that there- but happy to hear people’s stories and experiences of doing that) but I’ve had a really tough Fortnight and when I went back to the docs this week he wanted me to try mirtazipine. I have taken that for two nights but after a chat with my therapist this morning who’s very critical of medications and the role of seretonin in all this I’m questioning if it’s the right thing. It’s all so hard when you are extremely desperate and just want relief really interested to hear everyone’s views and experiences

Hi All Just wanted to say thank you this website has saved my life and now that I'm able to join after months of struggle. I have been on quite a few drugs over the years mainly benzo's and paroxetine. I was prescribed 2mg rivotrol or clonazepam for sleep 2015 - 2020 and in 2020 got covid and later suffered covid fog which I release now was WD. Was prescribed 2020 for a 6 month period Propranolol (can't remember dose) Clonazpem 2mg Xanax 2mg (I think) Prednisone 10 tablets a day ( Weaned of reducing buy 2 tablets a day) Paroxetine 10mg. 2020 - 2023 Aug 19 Cold Turkey Paroxetine 10mg Clonazepam 2mg - 4mg 2022 March - 2023 March Ritalin I stabilized after the supposed covid fog was 5- 6 months of absolute hell. And then functioned ok for a year and a half , then things starting getting bad. I think leading up to the Ritalin, I look back now and think it was medically induced Hypomania. As people said I talked alot which I did and then by mid 2023 I was mostly in hyper mania states and especially that last 2 months before I was forced to stop cold turkey as I admitted myself to a rehab for 28 days. Where I suffered withdrawal for 2 weeks. I started working after and after 6 weeks of the cold turkey I've been in WD , December 2023 was absolute hell almost no sleep, debilitating anxiety and depression, panic attacks , brain zaps from sound ( they were worse after a few days of cold turkey) still here tho, lights sensitivity, and lots of fog can't see how I wil ever enjoy life again things I once enjoyed etc Can't even watch TV I mostly live in my head. I'm not functioning and haven't been since the withdrawals kicked in. I believe I've come along way as I have some days where it's bearable and some evenings which I feel almost normal. In December I was suicidal 95% of the time. I have very bad mornings which I believe are because of increased cortisol. Feels now like I'm in 75% wave and 20% bearable window and 5% or less when I might just feel like myself. Although to survive this I've had to not trust my thoughts (especially since being manic last year where I did crazy things) and my intrusive thoughts have been so negative and debilitating the only way it's to say it not me. The bearable windows are mostly in states of Anhedonia or Apathy, which to be honest I'm still suicidal as I do not want to continue living like this not to mention all my family and friends think I went to rehab for drugs which I used every odd weekend think they just assume the worst as being hypomanic they would have to I guess. I honestly don't won't to continue to live like this, I know there are so many worse cases on this forum and I'm only 4 months in. I also know it's too late to reinstate and of the hell I've been through I know its not the right way. I've been taking Magnesium and Omega 3 which I assume is helping as December was harder and I have glimmers of hope here and there not for long. Still sleep between 3 - 4 hours a night waking up every hour. In December used urinate 12 plus times a night now maybe 4- 5 times. I have alot more to discuss and hopefully get some advice even tho I kind of gather that nothing can be done but exist and wait it out. Kind of just existing at this stage mostly on this website and bubble pop in my phone. Thanks all I'm in a bit of brain fog now so hope that makes sense. Also I gather I need to do my drug signature ?

Hi, I just signed up today. Started taking sertraline February 2021. Was initially on 50g and after a few weeks put up to 100 mg. Developed stiff hands, jaw and throat to point it affects speech when really tight. Also memory loss etc but not what is bothering me as much as the physical symptoms. Severe bruxism even with mouth guard. Stopped taking abruptly after 6 months as wanted to see if jaw and hand problem went away. It’s been over two years and still no different. Has anyone experienced similar. Thanks

I started Escitalopram 5mg for around 2 weeks everything was fine, didn’t have any issues. I was bumped up to 10mg around the 2 week mark and a couple days later i had numbness and burning on my forearm so I decided to quit cold turkey. I was fine for over a month but then i started to see withdrawals. I have a loss of touch and i have full body numbness, especially and night if i stay still might entire body will tingle and be completely numb. It’s been around 3 months now since i took my last dose and im not sure what sure what if i should reinstate the drug or just see if it eventually goes away. I just don’t know what to do