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hey! I just joined this site. I am a 23 year old female and took citalopram from age 16-19. I experienced genital anaesthesia, no libido and complete loss of sexuality and hoped that this would stop at discontinuation of the medicine. However I have been off the medication for 4 years now and nothing has returned back to normal and I still experience the same symptoms. I am so unhappy and frustrated about this. Has anything been found to restore sexual function, sensation? Are there any cases where PSSD actually went away after some time? Any information would be so helpful

Hi, I really don't know how to do this so please bare with me here. I have never used a website like this before - So I am new here. I don't know what else to do at this point. I am looking for some help and support from people that know what I'm going through and have experience in this area. I have been on Lexapro for over 3 years now - 20mg each night. On January 1st I decided I was going to taper off, like I have in the past with other drugs ive been on. It was my choice, I wanted to be completely free of any antidepressant or antipsychotic pharmaceutical, Lexapro was my last step/drug. At first I was doing ok - I went down from 20mg to 15 mg for about 30-35 days, then went from 15mg to 10mg for about another month or so. The 20-15mg was mild and tolerable but when I hit the 10 mg stage, I could really feel a difference. It was not pleasant and I wanted to go down faster but stuck it out for another month before I went down from 10mg - 5 mg. I was still sleeping during this time even tho it was different, I felt like If I was still able to get sleep that that was a good sign. The 10-5mg drop down wasn't too bad, I actually felt better on 5mg then 10 so I stayed on the 5mg for about 3 weeks. At this point I was cutting my pill into a fourth so it didn't feel like much. I felt well during this time I decided to drop down to 2.5mg. I didn't feel too much of a change and felt confident I could finally get off of this drug. So in a matter of about 2 weeks. I continued to go down from 2.5 to half, 1.25 and at that point I was dealing with such a small dose in my hand I just kept cutting the pill into smaller pieces. I probably should have stayed on those small pieces longer than I did, I think that was my error maybe? After 2 weeks I thought there was no point in taking crumbs of Lexapro, I thought it wasn't hurting or helping, so I could just stop taking it. I figured 3 and a half months or so was a patient and slow enough taper right? Well it turns out I was very wrong. The first day or two completely off of Lexapro weren't too much different, I actually felt relieved and like I had finally made it and crossed the finish line. I have been taking melatonin 5mg each night for the past year so this is all I was taking at that point and was still able to sleep even tho it felt different I was happy I could still sleep since I have always struggled with insomnia. But after about 3-4 day mark, I could really start to feel the withdrawals hitting hard. My brain went foggy and I started having what everybody calls the brain zaps, those were terrbible. I kept telling myself I can do this, I can make it, its just part of the process. well during this time now about 4-6 days of no Lexapro, I started getting really angry all of sudden, like full or rage for no apparent reason or if it was for a reason, it wasn't a valid reason to feel the anger and rage I felt. I became severely irritable and mad and ofcourse my best friend, the only one who has helped me through it all, couldn't be there for me. I didn't blame here, but it was very scary and frustraiting to have no help and to feel so helpless. I knew I was hitting a wall and my body was and brain were struggling and I needed help. Well filled with rage, I said some irritable things to my friend, nothing irreparable but very strong worded that I felt like I wasn't getting support that I needed. Whatever I said had a stronger reaction than I thought but all I could think at the time was trying to get through the next moment, one moment at a time. I couldlnt think of anything else. Anywyas this friend has now disappeared and doesn't trust me, but I have this happen before when Ive struggled. Its probably my fault but I do try to be a good person as much as I can but when I'm struggling and have no help I don't know what to do and lash out I guess at the person closest to me. I feel terrible this has happened but not much I can do at this point. Anyways, I continued going through withdrawals the second week. I could feel the brain zaps were diminishing which felt like progress but than the panic attack hit me. Out of nowhere I woke up in the middle of the night after taking melatonin like I always did and I woke up in some sort of half awake/half asleep way full of panic and struggling to breathe. I felt like I was going to die or atleast faint and hit my head on something and no one would know. I didn't know what to do. Ive never called 911 before but it felt like the only option I had. Those 15 minutes were the longest in my life or atleast it felt that way. The kind operator kept me calm and dispatched help on the way but I could hardly breathe and felt like I was going to pass out at any moment. my body at this point was shaking uncontrollably like I was freezing, and I couldn't stop it. all I remember is just trying to stay awake/alive until someone got here. I heard a knock on the door, it opened and the first emt that I saw walk in to my room all of a sudden gave me so many mixed emotions and feelings all at once. I felt extremely relieved and so much of the anxiety dissipated as soon I saw help had arrived. also I was struck with embarrasement and guilt at the same time as I had just then realized I wasn't dying and it was a panic attack and extreme anxiety. They took some tests and talked me through it and told me it was a panic attack. They were extrememely kind. I felt terrible I had wasted their time. But I truly felt like I was going to die. This was a scary wake up call. I knew I had to do something and I was scared it would happen again. The next two nights I would drive 45 minutes to my moms apartment to stay with her and I have no one else here or place to go. I wanted to be around someone. I slept okay that night but the second night only slept a few hours and the panic attack trioed to set in a few times those nights as well but I was able to realize what was happening and ward them . off. At this point I had to try something else for sleep to maybe replace the Lexapro? that's what I thought. So I started taking zzzquil which is just diphenhydramine like Benadryl. for the next week I would take that and melatonin and would have some success and some relapse of panic attacks throughout the night. during week 3 of being completely off of Lexapro, I could feel that my body was anxiety ritten. Just chalk full of it. I was thinking fast, talking fast and anxious about everything and could not relax no matter what I did or what breathing exercises or meditation. I continue to try natural approaches and personally feel I am a strong willed person but at the end of week 3 it became too much to handle. I caved in. I felt my body craving the Lexapro and as much as I didn't want to go back on it, I didn't know what else to do. I decided to take an extremely small dose probably .5 mg to 1mg just to see what would happen. Immediately I could feel the anxiety lessen and the first day or two felt like it was the right choice. Now here we are Monday 5/21/18. It was 10 days ago when I decided this. Since it felt right I continued to take a very small dose approximately 1 mg of Lexapro and the melatonin and now the zzzquil at night. My body and brain have been feeling all sorts of things - headaches all day, brain fog and uncontrollable brain feeling/thoughts at night right before I fade to sleep and yawning all day at work. Ofcourse I started a new job last Monday with delta that I will have to give up since I just cant manage now. This whole last week was probably 4 days of good/ok sleep enough to function/3 days of small panic attacks and anxiety and worry and not great sleep. But I thought this was better than before. I did continue to up the dose slightly each night and last night I think I took 2.5-3mg but its hard to say since I'm pill cutting and they are so small. I thought this was the right thing to do, but last night was the kicker. I was hoping to get sleep to continue my new job today. However I had a severe panic attack much like the one when I called 911. This time I knew what was happening so I didn't call them but it didn't make it any easier. I called my brother just to have someone to talk to. it lasted for about 20 minutes as my body continued to shake uncontrollably and I felt like I couldn't breathe but continued to try to breate and stay calm. This time it didn't go away. I couldn't go to sleep until about 4 am and woke up at 9 and still feel like my brain has this lasting hangover. Its hard to explain but I feel this imbalance in my body/brain, and I feel like panic can hit me at any time, even after I had some breakfast I felt panic and shortness of breathe so I am now afraid almost to eat or drink anything. I had chicken soup and water and have stayed home from work, called in sick and have called a doctor and will most likely go to the local urgent care tonight. Here is where I don't know what to do and would welcome and appreciate any input or help. Thank you for reading this far if youre still here. -- I am out of answers and don't know what to do tonight for sleep or if I should still take the Lexapro, or take less of it or if when I see a doctor I should take a new drug - everything seems not so fun and not like a good idea. So I feel like I am stuck. My health insurance sucks ofcourse my fault, I have some money saved up but that was for all the debt I still have so it will be hard to see that go. I am scarted to take the zzzquiil and have purchased so valerian root, ive heard its good but I'm nervous to take anything new at this point. I hope whoevert I see tonight will have some insight but I am not so sure they will, ive never had much luck with doctors. I am more scared than ive been in a long time. The last time any of this happened was during my divorce. it was an all time low point in my life. I had been on Seroquel for about 8-9 years, Depakote and lithium for about the same. I found myself not caring about my life and my marriage and everything I knew had ended/ust been taken from me. During this time I had more complications than ever with trying new drugs and coming off of these old ones. Klonopin helped but then I became dependant on it every day and used for over 2 years but I successfully withdrew from that last year, it was hell. I'm sorry to ramble on. And I'm sorry for everyone who has to deal with this. I feel incredibly hopeless and alone. I feel like I have failed once again at holding a job and becoming self dependant. Once again I am a man who is sick and troubled and always needs help and cant support myself. I hate this feeling. I just want to get better. I have been striving as much as I could over the last 4 years to become healhty, on less drugs, better eating habits, working harder and making enough money to support myself and all the good stuff that ive wanted in a healthy life but I have failed once again. If you have any input or knowledge of this type of thing or have an idea of what ive done to myself or what I can do I would greatly appreciate your help. Thank you for listening

Zoloft withdrawal success - my story When I first decided to wean myself off of Zoloft, I searched the internet for stories about people who had successfully gotten off antidepressants and had trouble finding them so I promised myself that if I made it I would post my story. Tomorrow, will mark my "no Zoloft for one year" anniversary. In that time, I haven't used alcohol or any other mood altering substance either, and I'm doing fine. It hasn't been easy, and it took a while, but I made it and I was able to function, to work and to take care of myself throughout. Diagnosed with social anxiety and depression when I was in my mid 40s, I was put on Zoloft and stayed at 200mg per day for around 5 years. The Zoloft helped me. It took the edge off of my anxiety, and since my depression was the result of my anxiety, it helped with that as well. Another pleasant side effect was that I lost a few pounds. So why would I want to stop taking it? The Nurse Practitioner who prescribed the meds was puzzled. It works, why stop taking it? I can't fully answer that question, but I think it has something to do with the fact that I've struggled with addiction my entire life. Drugs, alcohol, food... maybe I felt like by taking the Zoloft I was avoiding dealing with one of the major themes of my life. Whatever the reason, I wanted to stop taking it. I'd tried twice using the NP's tapering recommendation, which was to decrease by 50mg every week for a month. I never made it past the first week because I'd have flashes of disorientation and dizziness (which I didn't mind) and then become anxious and depressed (which I did mind). She told me Zoloft didn't cause withdrawal symptoms, it was my natural state of anxiety and depression returning, so I needed to stay on the Zoloft. I knew I was having withdrawal symptoms, but they were so intense I couldn't function, so went back on the Zoloft. Then my mother told me that she had weaned herself off of Premerin by doing a very slow taper over the course of a year, so I decided to try that. My plan was to decrease the Zoloft by 25mg every month over a period of 8 months. The first month was fine. I'd have rough patches, but they were manageable. After 8 months I was off the Zoloft but a few weeks later, I started having withdrawal symptoms including what people refer to as "brain zaps." I called them "head rushes" because it felt like my brain was being flooded by chemicals. Then I became anxious and depressed again, so I decided to go back up to the lowest dosage where I felt good, which was 50mg. Then instead of tapering at 25mg per month, I reduced it to 10mg a month, and that is how I eventually got off the Zoloft. Whenever the withdrawal symptoms became uncomfortable, I'd go back up to a "comfortable" dosage then begin tapering in smaller increments, a "progressive taper," similar to what is recommended in the book "The Anti-Depressant Solution," and on this website. Eventually I had to buy a milligram scale (available on amazon), because the increments became so small. I was amazed how sensitive my body had become to the tiniest adjustments in dosage. The last month I was down to 5mg, and I stopped taking Zoloft completely February 1, 2014. One year ago tomorrow. I was on 200mg of Zoloft for 5 years and it took 2 ½ years to taper off completely. It took a long time, but I wanted to taper safely, physically and emotionally. And I did. During that time I was able to work and to meet all my social commitments. At the suggestion of the NP, I joined a social anxiety group which used Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. She warned that I shouldn't go off the meds without addressing the underlying cause, which made sense to me. However, I also believe that much of my anxiety and depression was situational, even though she maintained it was my natural state. When I first came to her, I was going through an extremely stressful period of my life. I was having problems finding work and didn't know how I was going to pay my rent or survive from month to month. I went on one job interview after another and I think social anxiety and depression were my way of trying to protect myself from more rejection and failure. So how do I feel now, one year later? I'm doing okay. I occasionally get a head rush, but it's very mild. I wouldn't today describe myself as either socially anxious or depressed, but I know that this is how I react to stress, and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy has helped me develop strategies for dealing with those tendencies. 12 step programs, self help books, spiritual practices like yoga and meditation, healing modalities like Reiki, and individual therapy have all been part of my healing process as well. On this journey, life has given me both challenges and assistance in dealing with social anxiety and depression. For example, as I was tapering I started dating someone for the first time in years, and we had a fun relationship which helped heal a lot of issues relating to social anxiety. Then, after two years we broke up, so that offered its challenges, but I didn't sink into depression, which was kind of amazing. At the time, I also had bed bugs which deprived me of sleep and sent my anxiety through the roof, but I survived that too. (The bed bugs did not.) My ex-boyfriend introduced me to hiking, which I loved, so I started going to hiking meet-ups and found a circle of friends who also love to hike which helped heal a different aspect of my social anxiety. Also, becoming more physically active probably helped with the depression... In other words, life went on. There were challenges and there were opportunities and often the challenges were the opportunities. The Zoloft helped me get through a very difficult period of my life, and I'm grateful for that, but I had no idea what I was getting myself into. But here I am, 8 ½ years later, and I haven't used Zoloft or any mood altering drugs, alcohol or coffee (all of which affect my anxiety and depression) for a year. Today, I feel optimistic and hopeful. I know life will have it's challenges but also that I have resources and strategies to assist me, and I am grateful to all who have helped me on this journey; therapists, teachers, friends, strangers, nature, and also to life itself, which Eckhart Tolle calls "the greatest guru of all." Do I have moments of fear and anxiety? Yes! Do I have moments of happiness and joy? Yes! Do I have moments of depression and sadness? Yes! Do I have moments of laughter and silliness? Yes! All of it, yes. What I was dreading is that it would be unending anxiety and depression, and that hasn't been my experience. Life is okay, with its highs and lows and all of it. Like Snoop Dogg says, "it's all good."

Hi, As I am new to this forum I like to introduce myself. My name is Jennifer and I'm from Holland. I'm 33 years old. I have been on celexa for 17 years.. got forced by my parents when I was 15 and haven't been able to quit them since. Now I'm 3 weeks into weaning of again and it has been hell. I went from 20mg to 15mg and am planning to stay on 15mg for 3 months or at least till I'm stable again. I'm also planning to have fluods instead of pills so I can wean off more slowly as I feel I'm going too fast now. My withdrawal symptoms are: headaches, nausea, dizziness, fatigue, feeling numb, hard time spelling words, no apatite, panic attacks at night, severe neck pain. I hope I will do better soon..

I'm a 28 year old man from Greece. I am suffering from ssri side effects 8 years now. I think that Imight suffering from withdrawal symptom (or Pssd). I don't know also if there is a difference. I was diagnosed with OCD in 2009 and I was on Prozac from 2009 to 2014 daily on 60mg. On this time interval I have noticed that I had weak erections without paying real attention. But when I I had awful experiences with women where I didn't have enough erections then I realized that the prozac may be the cause. I haven't taken it since 2014. Occassionally I was on zoloft to 20mg (the indicated dose for ocd) but I stopped them gradually. Since April 2017 I am not taking any medication but I have to confess that I have to tackle severe side effects such as erectile dysfunction, muted or inability to orgasm I noticed also impaired seven quality and sometimes the quantity was insufficient (almost zero). I am in a bad situation and I feel regretful for taking these drugs. I preferred to have OCD (or whatever mental illness is this) rather than facing impotence and inability to have children. Has anyone an idea about what am I supposed to do?

Peter Gotzschke recently came to Australia, and toured around our cities, lecturing sometimes 3-5 times in each major city. He had an important message to bring, and his reputation preceded him - lots of pdocs came, and other care providers. Some of the pdocs argued with him (in Brisbane) about the value of "forced treatment" and neuroleptics, insisting that the benefit of these drugs "saved lives." Here is the Melbourne talk:

Here I am, lost and Confused as usual... I was mean to the one I love and scared him away to sleep on the couch... how many more times will he be able to take my emotions? Luckily, we don't have a kid - but we do have a kitty. I am in love with my little family and the world is so harsh... I am not from here. I am from another province full of energy pillpoppers and alcoholism and cold-hearted humans. This province was opportunity to escape, and I needed it. Sometimes I get scared that I cannot escape my problems again and I want the pain to go away. I want to start over... all the time. I was too old to be adopted, but accepted into a family still. I was given a voice, but I used it to disagree. Surely I am an adult, and I should be treated like one. It is always money and no one else wants to be wrong when I'm around. I am kind. I am honest. I am an animal lover. I don't do drugs that aren't prescribed and I don't hurt anyone if I can help it. Why am I the easiest one to blame? I can take abuse, but never the emotional kind... please don't raise your voice or yell. My new mom was so quick to put me on drugs to mold me into her perfect doctor. Surely I gained weight when I moved out, because I stopped having constant meals and money was a problem. It was the first time I stopped consistently taking my drugs. No one ever told me how to take them properly, and I've yet to take them at the same time until recently. I'm unsure what to do with my iron pills, but they seem to be the only ones helping. Maybe there is a reason I bought Omega 3 Fish oils and vitamins. I am a pale-skin colour-sensitive woman with major PTSD from childhood trauma... I finally removed my mother from my life - but the other snakes slowly replace her. I was never checked up on as a child, I never knew what normal was. I was never anorexic but I don't remember eating because my mother told me we were both picky. I have terrible teeth, and I'm overweight. I cut all my hair off because I make impulsive decisions... but it's growing back healthier! Just not fast enough. I've lost another job. This is the first one that got rid of me. I called in sick in my probationary period, because I was withdrawing.... And I have no help.... I don't want to go to the doctor anymore. I was free of pills and almost maybe doing okay but Effexor found its way??? And I've never felt the pain of trying to quit until now.. Hot and colds and puking all over the floor... financial issues are a big thing and my man cannot do it alone but I have no money and we are slowly diminishing. I don't want to eat when there is food, just so it'll last a bit longer... I need help but everyone is so damn quick to put the pills back in my mouth and make sure they're swallowed. I am probably a hereditary bipolar... if I would have been helped I might have done better. I started smoking a bit more pot and it gave me the confidence I needed to do research and learn... sometimes I try too hard to put together pieces of puzzles I don't understand and I start to sound crazy to anyone looking to listen or judge... I'm on my period and I'm practically anemic, so the withdraws are definitely just the cherry on top aren't they? I do my best late at night... I forgot to take a pill to wean myself off of and it was so bad. The last few days I took 3 then took the risk of 2 but managed to take 1 and live... maybe I can handle the pains if I sleep more. I don't feel like I have a reason to live, so maybe sleeping will help me catch up. I'm hungry.... I didn't think I'd write this much... or anything at all. I am thankful for this forum... thankful so many can submit stories to compare. I was an ugly child, but I was somewhat smarter than most when it came to random things. I think the fact there were too many people in the room made it harder to learn. It's hard to be a tomboy and a partial nerd when the boys want to touch you. When did becoming promiscuous get so easy? If I could take it all back, I would have stayed smart... but there were too many distractions. I think the drugs helped me even hear better and that made them so easy to take. Maybe the absence of them will influence a loss in this extra 40 pounds I carry. Maybe all of my problems were unknown withdraws from each and every new miracle drug. I smoke my weed to help me remember... I know some may disagree - but I am already damaged and I only reap the benefits. The ability to feel hunger... I only feel it when I'm starving and it's too late. Where do I go from here? I've been checked into the psychward as an adolescent many moons ago... I'm in my 20s and I don't want to be stuck there, and without my little kitty. He purrs when I cry, and makes everything okay. I even considered joining the army because I didn't mind dying, but I could never survive the time away. I think I will be okay in time... I hope it doesn't get too hard. I haven't taken any specific pill consistently, so I'm unsure of what to compare - and the doctor doesn't even know what she's giving me anymore. Oh. You're hurting? There's a drug for that. Let me write you something. Sorry for the rant. Thanks for listening... Good vibes only, please. I used to be so quick to judge and assume people want to yell DEPRESSED because it's trendy... when the 20 something years of pain is something I'd never wish on my worst enemy... I know the difference now, and all I want to do is help people. My problem is all I do is help everyone else and I'm left to pick up my own pieces that I didn't know were missing in the process.

Here I am, lost and Confused as usual... I was mean to the one I love and scared him away to sleep on the couch... how many more times will he be able to take my emotions? Luckily, we don't have a kid - but we do have a kitty. I am in love with my little family and the world is so harsh... I am not from here. I am from another province full of energy pillpoppers and alcoholism and cold-hearted humans. This province was opportunity to escape, and I needed it. Sometimes I get scared that I cannot escape my problems again and I want the pain to go away. I want to start over... all the time. I was too old to be adopted, but accepted into a family still. I was given a voice, but I used it to disagree. Surely I am an adult, and I should be treated like one. It is always money and no one else wants to be wrong when I'm around. I am kind. I am honest. I am an animal lover. I don't do drugs that aren't prescribed and I don't hurt anyone if I can help it. Why am I the easiest one to blame? I can take abuse, but never the emotional kind... please don't raise your voice or yell. My new mom was so quick to put me on drugs to mold me into her perfect doctor. Surely I gained weight when I moved out, because I stopped having constant meals and money was a problem. It was the first time I stopped consistently taking my drugs. No one ever told me how to take them properly, and I've yet to take them at the same time until recently. I'm unsure what to do with my iron pills, but they seem to be the only ones helping. Maybe there is a reason I bought Omega 3 Fish oils and vitamins. I am a pale-skin colour-sensitive woman with major PTSD from childhood trauma... I finally removed my mother from my life - but the other snakes slowly replace her. I was never checked up on as a child, I never knew what normal was. I was never anorexic but I don't remember eating because my mother told me we were both picky. I have terrible teeth, and I'm overweight. I cut all my hair off because I make impulsive decisions... but it's growing back healthier! Just not fast enough. I've lost another job. This is the first one that got rid of me. I called in sick in my probationary period, because I was withdrawing.... And I have no help.... I don't want to go to the doctor anymore. I was free of pills and almost maybe doing okay but Effexor found its way??? And I've never felt the pain of trying to quit until now.. Hot and colds and puking all over the floor... financial issues are a big thing and my man cannot do it alone but I have no money and we are slowly diminishing. I don't want to eat when there is food, just so it'll last a bit longer... I need help but everyone is so damn quick to put the pills back in my mouth and make sure they're swallowed. I am probably a hereditary bipolar... if I would have been helped I might have done better. I started smoking a bit more pot and it gave me the confidence I needed to do research and learn... sometimes I try too hard to put together pieces of puzzles I don't understand and I start to sound crazy to anyone looking to listen or judge... I'm on my period and I'm practically anemic, so the withdraws are definitely just the cherry on top aren't they? I do my best late at night... I forgot to take a pill to wean myself off of and it was so bad. The last few days I took 3 then took the risk of 2 but managed to take 1 and live... maybe I can handle the pains if I sleep more. I don't feel like I have a reason to live, so maybe sleeping will help me catch up. I'm hungry.... I didn't think I'd write this much... or anything at all. I am thankful for this forum... thankful so many can submit stories to compare. I was an ugly child, but I was somewhat smarter than most when it came to random things. I think the fact there were too many people in the room made it harder to learn. It's hard to be a tomboy and a partial nerd when the boys want to touch you. When did becoming promiscuous get so easy? If I could take it all back, I would have stayed smart... but there were too many distractions. I think the drugs helped me even hear better and that made them so easy to take. Maybe the absence of them will influence a loss in this extra 40 pounds I carry. Maybe all of my problems were unknown withdraws from each and every new miracle drug. I smoke my weed to help me remember... I know some may disagree - but I am already damaged and I only reap the benefits. The ability to feel hunger... I only feel it when I'm starving and it's too late. Where do I go from here? I've been checked into the psychward as an adolescent many moons ago... I'm in my 20s and I don't want to be stuck there, and without my little kitty. He purrs when I cry, and makes everything okay. I even considered joining the army because I didn't mind dying, but I could never survive the time away. I think I will be okay in time... I hope it doesn't get too hard. I haven't taken any specific pill consistently, so I'm unsure of what to compare - and the doctor doesn't even know what she's giving me anymore. Oh. You're hurting? There's a drug for that. Let me write you something. Sorry for the rant. Thanks for listening... Good vibes only, please. I used to be so quick to judge and assume people want to yell DEPRESSED because it's trendy... when the 20 something years of pain is something I'd never wish on my worst enemy... I know the difference now, and all I want to do is help people. My problem is all I do is help everyone else and I'm left to pick up my own pieces that I didn't know were missing in the process.

Did you see that yesterday the electronic version of the New York Times had a front page article on the difficulties of antidepressants withdrawal? I thought it might mention a new resource, my book ‘Understanding Antidepressants’. I’ve presented the science behind how antidepressants work, their possible benefits, drawbacks (notably withdrawal), and alternatives. It’s available on Amazon. My hope is that is will be a good source of information. Would appreciate your feedback and suggestions for future editions. Link is: https://www.amazon.com/Understanding-Antidepressants-Wallace-B-Mendelson-ebook/dp/B07B4GWKSN/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1520279221&sr=1-1&keywords=Understanding+antidepressants&dpID=51CRhuvoM8L&preST=_SY445_QL70_&dpSrc=srchl I’d also like to learn from you, am looking forward to reading about your experiences.

Last summer, after I quit the last antidepressant (after 7 years of antidepressants and anxiolytics) under the guidance of my former psychiatrist, I started rapidly to develop old and new symptoms. I tried to resist but in two months time I fell into the abyss of withdrawal, without knowing what was happening to me. I went back to my psychiatrist who not only did not recognize or mention the withdrawal status, but prescribed new drugs that didn't help and made things worse, like paroxetine. I was lost and fearfully sick, I lost 3 kilos in one week, then I contacted another psychiatrist who still didn't say a word about withrdrawal but prescribed benzodiazepines that immediately reduced the symptoms. Then he added two antidepressants and diagnosed "major depression, relapse". I was in shock. I tried to explain that my initial and main problem were anxiety and panic but he said thet it was all part of the depressive state. As soon as we tried to reduce anxiolytics the symptoms burst out again. That's when something clicked in my head. I searched the Internet for weeks to find someone who could help me out of the maze, and fortunately I did. Now I'm following a program to eliminate antidepressants under strict medical a psychological control, and I feel confident. Psychiatrists in Italy never talk about the risk of withdrawal symptoms, turning people into lifetime patients. I was lucky enough, being a psychologist and speaking English to be able to find the help I needed, but most people go on taking more and more drugs that work less and less. The site people can refer to in Italy is: https://www.smettereglipsicofarmaci.unifi.it/index.php (University of Florence).

Hi, I’m not sure if this topic already exists somewhere else on the site. I have been recovering from protracted antidepressant withdrawl for some time now which has caused me to have to step down from a very stressful nursing position. I have been going to therapy and walking dogs for a little while now, but I feel like it’s time for me to take the next step. I need a stable paycheck and need to find something that isn’t as stressful as managing 5 acute post op patients, but is more involved than walking dogs. Any suggestions? I have my bachelors degree in nursing. I don’t want to push myself too much because I’ve already been through the devastating experience of crashing and burning at the hospital during acute withdrawl. However at the same time, I think that I can handle a lot more than my brain thinks that it can handle, if that’s makes sense. I would love to hear what has worked for people.

Hi, where do I start? I am in desperate need of help with tapering my Mom off of a variety of meds. So here is our story... We are originally from London, we now live in South Africa. I mam 46 and Mom is 66, I have a son who is 14 and we now share a rented house. My Dad died March 2016. This caused huge emotional trauma for my Mom as you can imagine. My Gran in the UK then became sick so Mom flew over to help (not ideal when you are going through grief and already not coping on a day to day basis, her world had been crushed in one night) So, she went to the UK and it was hard to cope with my Gran being so ill, my Mom had a breakdown, she ended up in a Psychiatric unit (admitted herself) after becoming addicted to Alzam (benzo). She originally was prescribed these here in SA years ago to manage anxiety and panic attacks. Once the emotional stress hit she started taking them more and more each day until she tried to stop, cut them down on her own and that is when the trouble and side effects started. She then went into the Psych unit in the UK. They then put her on to another type of benzo Diazepam, Olanzapine, Mirtazpine and she is also on heart and blood thinners. Once she came out she was not much better, I managed to get her on a flight and back to SA. 2 month later she just got worse, the local Dr and team tried to taper her off of the Diazepam but she is not good with the withdrawal symptoms. After many Drs, therapists, advice, research and suffering alot at home (for all of us) I checked her into a very expensive rehab here. 28 day program. She is now on: Circadin, Trepiline, Rivotril, Solian and heart and blood thinners. The program did not work, the rehab and getting her off the benzos and antipsychotics did not work. What I need advice, help with from anyone is what now? The cost of the rehab was thousands.... Her current state is anxiety all the time, her eyes are large and she looks constantly in fear or amazement, delayed speech, confusion, short term memory is bad, long term not great either, no energy, out of breath, so her quality of life is dismal. She does not go out and has a 'cannot be bothered attitude towards much of life, she lost 17 kg and looks anorexic, she eats but does not put on weight. I would love to look at tapering but just do not know which one to start with? How much and obviously with her it would need to be slow. Can one start to reduce the antipsychotic first? I know Benzos are highly addictive and Rivotril is one! Can anyone help?

I am at such a low point because of my moms obsession with me taking medication. Any time I get remotely upset about anything she immediately asks if I'm "taking my meds". Her harassment is what's pushing me in to depression and no amount of words make her understand what a piece of garbage she makes me feel when she consistently invalidates me. I can never be anything but happy or I'm crazy to her.

A live interview last night about PSSD awareness on Juliemadblogger Radio. It has been recorded and widely available for free on demand at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/juliemadblogger/2017/10/22/guest-from-uk-pssd-sexual-dysfunction-from-psychiatric-drugs You can also download the mp3 version that can be listened to offline by clicking the download icon at the top too... (top right) Please share and distribute as widely as possible on social media and websites. And help spread PSSD Awareness.

Hello, I was diagnosed with fibro in 1994. I was just diagnosed by a rheumatologist with CSS - central sensitivity syndrome. A central nervous system disease/disorder that makes people hypersensitive to almost everything. Here are two studies that might be of interest: Fibromyalgia and Overlapping Disorders: The Unifying Concept of Central Sensitivity Syndromes by Muhammad B Yunus, MD -also: clinical review and education- JAMA April 16, 2014 volume 311, number 15 - Fibromyalgia A Clinical Review by Daniel J Clauw, MD. These articles show how the central nervous system plays a huge role in why so many of us have fibromyalgia CFS/ME, MCS-Multiple Chemical Sensitivities, etc. This explains why I've had so much trouble with antidepressants, benzodiazepines, and withdrawals, along with so many other physical and emotional symptoms

I don't profess to know what it's like to live with anxiety, depression, or "medically diagnosed psychosis" in any form. Nor have I experienced the brain numbing side effects of the so called "Happy Pills" that are dished out like lollies to children and adults alike. And now Babies are the next largest growing market for these personality fixers. I live on the "Otherside". Firstly, I am the Mother, who against all pleading, and arguing with Doctor's (of all ranks) to not put my then "coming of a Meth Addiction" Son, onto Anxiety medication, was ignored. We are the people who stand by and watch as our loved one's fall apart slowly, in front of our eyes. The one's who are powerless to help and to fix it, because we are "out ranked" by the people who are supposed to know what is best. What I have done, is make it my life's work to understand Addiction and Anxiety - including coming off of these debilitating drugs and what happens within the brain from an unconscious, neuroscience and being in control of yourself perspective. I found this site because I too was looking for some answers on "cold turkey withdrawal". My Son decided to go cold turkey off of his Antidepressants 3 1/2 weeks ago. His decision? because he was sick of the night terrors, cold sweats and feeling like he was constantly in a fog. He asked me to help in my professional capacity and together we got through the hard parts. He still has a way to go, and I am not recommending going "cold turkey" However, what I can say is this: There IS clarity at the end of that foggy tunnel, allow your mind and body to adjust to this new drug free you. It will take sometime, it will happen. I am here to lend support just like all of the other amazing people in this forum . If I am able to support you by giving you any tools that will assist you. I will. Here is something I would like to share with you; You don't need to be strong. Realise, really understand and see, just how self empowered you have become, by being on this journey. And that you are absolutely AWESOME!!!! In those moments of doubt and grayness, give yourself permission to acknowledge just how amazing you are. You have come this far, keep going! xx

I was interviewed on the everyday psychvictims project. Share if you care.

Hello . I took anti depressants ,anti anxiety , syzophenia medicines for one month . One doctor prescribed me these medicines after knowing the side effects in inherent I was scared to eat it and didn't want to eat it . I started suffering from acidity after eating I felt scared all the time 24/7 . My legs shivered atoagocally when I tried sitting still , my brain stopped working normally , I stopped eating properly , I stopped caring about everything , then I went to another psychiatrist . He told me I have been prescribed wronge medicines . Which is the syzophenia one cause I don't have syzophenia . I was shocked :((( cause I already ate it for 1 month ... I had to leave school when I promoted to class 9 cause I couldn't concentrate at all it's been a year I threw away those medicines and also complained to the psychiatrist about the side effects . I had brain pain after I stopped taking the 1 mg medicines each . Now I don't have brain pain . every time I tried studying my brain pained I was always a good student first time ever I failed I cried day and nighth I couldn't study and remember things whereas I was the best student layer after seeing my state my parents supported me and complained to psychiatrist . I'm still crying while writing this I thought I will never ever recover and I can't live with brain pain forever . I cried everyday and slowly the brain pain went . I'm healing . Thankgod I didn't eat it for 3 months but I completed 50% course . I think I'll fail next year too . Will I ever recover full my teachers noticed changes in me and told my parents what happened to me . I have heard from 2 people they suffered same things but got addicted to medicines

In-depth article about how genetics informs how you process drugs, and also how it affects drug interactions, and the genetic tests used to determine if you will likely react badly to a drug or not. It's written by a forensic medical examiner. I've only skimmed it but seems well worth a read through. https://www.madinamerica.com/2017/01/cyp-testing-prevent-dangerous-adverse-drug-reactions/ CYP Testing to Help Prevent Dangerous Adverse Drug Reactions By Selma Eikelenboom-Schieveld, MD January 24, 2017 Readers of this website might be aware that antidepressants can cause suicide, other violent behavior and even homicide. These can be side effects or adverse drug reactions from the medication taken. Not only can antidepressants cause these side effects, but basically every psychoactive medication can put patients at risk. Few people may know that there are DNA tests that can identify individuals who might be prone to these adverse drug reactions.1 To understand what kind of information such a test would provide, it might be helpful to explain the science behind these DNA tests. In general, human cells contain 23 pairs of chromosomes. The father donates half of the chromosomes; the other half comes from the mother. Every chromosome contains many genes. A gene is the part of the DNA that codes for proteins, and proteins cause hereditary characteristics to be expressed. A gene can have two forms, called alleles. If someone inherits the same allele from the father and the mother, the person is called homozygous for that trait; if they are different, the person is heterozygous. Medication needs to be metabolized to be expelled from the body. This is done by certain proteins called enzymes. Most medications that interact with brain chemistry are metabolized by an enzyme system called Cytochrome P450 (also known as CYP450 or P450). There are many different P450 enzymes, and they are divided into families and subfamilies. Cytochrome P450 family names are denoted by an Arabic number (e.g., CYP2), the subfamily by a Roman uppercase letter (e.g., CYP2D), and the individual enzymes by another Arabic number (e.g., CYP2D6). The alleles are indicated with an asterisk and a number, separated by a forward slash. More at above link...

Hi, I think lately I've been under covert medication. Anybody recognizes these symptoms with any antidepressant or antipsychotic? Thank you in advance. -Extreme photophobia (light hurts even at night with street lights or car lights) -Excess of fat in your stools (daily) (soft, greasy and pale yellow stools) -Urgency to urinate constantly -Lack of concentration -Feeling cold all the time but sometimes you feel heat intolerant (even when you are in direct sunlight you feel almost hypothermia) -Acathisia or restless sensation all the time -Racing thoughts all the time -Extreme Insomnia -Unability to achieve a lasting erection and difficult to achieve orgasms -Darkening and thickening of your hair, not only body hair but face and head (you have brown hair and the suddenly you have black thick and damaged-like hair) -You feel you cannot learn easily and you have a really hard time memorizing things you could easily do -You keep sweating and sweating but at the same time you have dry skin and sometimes lack of sweating in your face (cold, clammy skin) -You leave a weird odor in your clothes, always, even if you bathe yourself well -Dry mouth and bad breath even if you wash your teeth -ANNOYING muscle tightness (it feels like you just cannot relax your muscles and all the time you feel like if they are pulling) -Feeling like walking as a drunk or you feel you don't have stability as you walk -Lack of judgment, (getting very emotional out of nothing or not really seeing the whole picture of situations) -You feel like you are more complaisant that normal (agreeing things you normally don't and feeling like you worry about what others can say about you when you normally don't) -Abnormal euphoria just because everything -Mood changes (from euphoria and being very emotional to rage and depression) -Losing sensation of your body (you touch yourself but it feels like you don't feel anything) -Pallor -Abnormal healing of wounds (I could have a cut but the wound won't heal as fast as before, it would just take weeks to properly close) -Wanting to talk and verbalize everything nonstop -Constant gum bleeding (very sensitive just by brushing teeth) -Strange change in food's taste -Fatigue alterning with periods of extreme energy and I-can-do-it-all periods -Feeling like you were running and agitated most of the time -You cannot stop moving your feet -Weight gain -Dilated pupils -Dry lips -Numbed tongue -Difficulty in speaking (like you don't know the words to describe something totally easy and normal, stuttering) -Dilated arm veins -Ear buzzing -Increased sensitivity to normal noises -Difficulty to do maths -Eye bags and looking ill in general. -Feeling suicidal -Looking yellow sometimes -Having foam in your urine sometimes. -Zero sexual arousal (it is like you do not feel aroused or have erections as you normally do) In general, feeling like you are totally drugged, in a dream, or as I have read, like if you were on cocaine. I would thank if someone would recognize these symptoms and tell with what kind of medication did you feel them as I suspect I have been under covert medication because I refused at first to take those things. It is a long story but I have been medicated wrongly because I have a tumor that causes me weird things and they thought I was depressed just because at first they didn't find anything. Furthermore, a lot of physicians just simply didn't know or explain weird symptoms like extreme photophobia. I swear I had to wear sunglasses even at night because that symptom was unbearable, it literally caused me pain in the day or even when I looked at the floor, strangely that was when I had dilated pupils, really big pupils. I don't do drugs and this happened overnight. The most weird thing is the photophobia, dilated pupils and muscular tightness for me, I was checked neurologically and everything was fine, no head tumors, no eye damage, anything at all. I suspect this covert medication because stubborn psychiatrists wanted to put me on medications and I refused completely because I knew something physical was wrong instead of just a "mental illness", whatever that means. Most of these symptoms suddenly started to dissapear a year and a half ago, gradually, and then I got like a withdrawal syndrome feeling suicidal, like I couldn't go out of bed, suddenly that euphoria went off and nothing would satisfy me at all, it is like a flat emotional response, but then you get depressed and angry, nausea, sweaty.. a total mess. Now, after all that last stir, the last months I have been feeling more like myself and all those symptoms dissapearing but I want to know because all of this seems so suspicious to me. Now, my original physical condition it is not treated so you cannot blame the getting better to a treatment to the physical ailment. Another thing I would want to ask is that if a withdrawal syndrome can last up to many years after you have taken the medications, because I stopped taking those things by myself from one day to another without gradually diminish them and I was wondering if that withdrawal could have lasted by six years (which I don't think so), so my family would have decided to go on covert medication by psychiatrist orders or something or is just something else that I have in my body. I really feel like crap and as if my brain was shook and then you come back to normal life after (and that is something that tumor doesn't do and do not behaves like that).

If you or a loved one had a child with a birth defect after taking antidepressants during pregnancy and you are willing to be interviewed about your experience, PM me and we'll talk. I am a free-lance writer specializing in medical harm.

Hi! I'm Britt777. I joined this site to figure out what is causing me numerous symptoms. Here is my brief story: Took Lexapro for about 3 years or more, came off of it Tried Trintillex and Brintillex, didn't like the way it made me feel Doctor then tried Fluvoxamine 100mg and took that for 7 months. He decided to add Wellbutrin (Bupropion XL 150mg) along with it. A month later I ask to stop Fluvoxamine (Luvox) because I felt like I was experiencing "depersonalization" or pretty much felt like life was not real and was a dream. So, at that appointment he told me to stop the Fluvoxamine and upped my Wellbutrin to 300mg once a day. The first day from this switch I felt great. Then the second day came... had nausea, lightheadedness, dizziness, "brain zaps", increased tinnitus (ringing in the ears), blurry vision, feeling like I could pass out, headaches, head pressure, and crazy fluctuating heart rate. (Today I had a heart rate of 100 and dropped to 70 within 5 minutes without doing anything different.) This is day 7 since the switch. I just want to find out if it's withdrawal symptoms from the Fluvoxamine since he didn't advise me to taper or if it's a reaction to upping the Wellbutrin.

Please help, 2 weeks ago I was prescribed 50mg sertraline for intrusive thoughts, but was not depressed. I took my first one and about 6 hours later I had a very bad reaction I had a fever my blood pressure was high, I had diarrhea and my mind was cray I knew instantly that I had poisoned myself, it wasn't until a week later I read up on serotonin syndrome and realized I experienced all the side effects and still suffer some of them to this day, here are my symptoms I have and have got worse short term Memory loss, agitation, irritability, muscle twitching, shivering, restlessness, sweating(up my neck and scalp mostly), hallucinations derealization/depersonalization, feel disoriented at times, muscle spasms which are painful at times, tingling/prickling sensations in my hands feet chest arms and legs, pressure at the back of my head. I don't get it I was a happy outgoing person until the doctor insisted the tablet would take away intrusive thoughts, not only do I still get them but get even worse! hallucinations! I don't want this Have I got the effects from serotonin syndrome or is this permanent nerve and brain damage? please help I am quite worried and no one wants to listen to me

Hi I am an Orthomolecular Practitioner with extensive experience in the field of mental health, having worked as a clinician for almost 14 years. I have been treated with ANTIDEPRESSANTS MYSELF BEFORE entering the field of mental healthg and I know first hand of the terrible side effects of the medications. Please take note. I am not here to promote my business and I have no self interest to promote. If anyone needs some help and advice, I can give it my best as I am trained professionally. I have no need for reminders either. If you want to learn, look at healyourmind.com.au Good luck

Hello All- Thank you in advance for any tips or support you can provide. I found this forum by accident, and am really struggling. By way of introduction: I am currently 27 years old, and was misdiagnosed in my adolescent years, sending me into a dreadful spiral of reliance on antidepressants and psychoactive drugs for over 10 years. About two years ago I found a wonderful doctor who saw that these were unnecessary and has been guiding me through the process of tapering off of ALL Medication. I have already been able to completely go off of Lamictal (originally 300mg), though it took me a year, and am now in the final stages of tapering off of 100mg Pristiq (has been an ongoing process since this past summer 2015). As of yesterday, I was taking (roughly since they're tough to cut without crumbling) 6 mg of Pristiq and since I cannot really cut them any smaller, today is Day 1 of being at 0 dosage. My doctor was transparent with me in that this may get messy, and it is difficult to predict how anyone will react to this final cut. All along with the cuts I have experienced: extreme anxiety (subsides as my body adjusts) Depersonalization or feeling totally light-headed and "stupid" Headaches Terrible stomach upset I am so fearful of this last cut because I know it will be the worst....yet I know that the positives of my doing so will outweigh whatever costs I need to incur to get there. Does anyone have any insight for folks who have been on high doses of Pristiq for 8+ years and may give me an idea of what to expect? I feel that's the worst part- not knowing what to expect. Many of these posts involve folks who have been on for just a few years, so I am curious as to how the long-term dependence will manifest itself for a case like mine. I am grateful for any words of wisdom you can provide. Thank you!! KimT1717