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  1. I took Effexor from November of 2020 to July of 2021 and then switched to escitalopram from August 2021 until April of 2022. I didn't really do a taper at all. It took about 2 - 3 weeks starting with every other day and then half a pill every other day. Far too quick, but the side effects of the escitalopram were so bad I just wanted off the medication. Effexor gave me oral thrush and vaginal yeast infections. I decided to switch to escitalopram. Well, I jumped from the frying pan into the fire. The side effects were horrendous. Some of them were back pain, sore dry mouth, burning mouth, burning tongue, a mouth full of ulcers, angular cheilitis, diarrhea and the list goes on. Unfortunately, I was totally failed by my doctor througout my ordeal. He couldn't figure out what was causing all my problems. What was happening to me are all listed as possible side effects, but he didn't bother to look this infomation up. I eventually figured it out through some research that I did on my own and I stopped the escitalopram. The most tragic event that happened was that my doctor failed to inform me that a month after I started the escitalopram my lipase levels started to rise. I only found out about my rising lipase levels 9 months later when I was finally able to get on-line to my health information. I ended up in the hospital with acute pancreatitis. Once again pancreatitis is listed as a possible side effect of most antidepressants. Since quitting I have experienced what so many others have. Some of the withdrawal symptoms I am dealing with are muscle pain, excruciating heartburn and abdominal pain, diarrhea, chills, hopelessness, attacks of terror, sore extremely dry mouth and tongue that has caused gum and teeth issues, painful indigestion, suicidal thoughts, organ pain, etc. I am very concerned about my pancreas. The pancreas does not regenerate itself like the liver does. My lipase evels remain high. This is concerning to me because my mother died of pancreatic cancer. My back pain was starting to get better until November when I faced a major setback that I am still dealing with. Another withdrawal symptom is bladder problems. I have bladder infection symptoms, but all the tests keep coming back negative. I paid to have a different test done that shows that I do have an infection, but I have to wait until April to see my urologist. I will be looking into getting a cystectomy. I can't believe I haven't gone septic. The setback because of this infection is excruciating abdominal pain, kidney pain, severe gastrointestinal pain, heartburn, suicidal thoughts, and crying all the time. I really don't want to fight anymore. I am hoping I will be able to write my success story one day.
  2. Hello - I attempted a direct switch from a high dose of lexapro to Sertraline under doctor guidance - I now realise from reading this website that I may have kindled my nervous system. I subsequently increased the lexapro dose and have reduced it again, probably making matters worse. The biggest effect I have had is a noticeable cognitive impact, my brain literally can't solve complex problems the way it could only a few months ago and I have had to step back from a senior executive role. I really don't know what to do - I stupidly halved my lexapro dose 4 days ago and think I should updose - but by how much? Have I done permanent brain damage because it feels like I have? My memory is shaky and complex math that was easy to me is now beyond me, almost like i've had a stroke or something.
  3. Hi, I am just making my first post here as requested. Essentially I started Escitalopram in March 2020 when feeling very anxious with obsessive thoughts. I was on Escitalopram from March 2020 to March 2023 when I spoke to my GP to talk about tapering because I had been feeling very mentally well for some time. They recommended I taper 50% every 2-3 weeks. I tapered a little slower than advised and took my last medication at the end of May 2023. I have experienced withdrawal symptoms since then. To start with I experienced brain zaps, flu like symptoms, aching joints and swollen feet during tapering. Post stopping the medication I had painful joints, digestive withdrawal symptoms, followed by fatigue and feeling faint. These have largely subsided now. But about two weeks ago I began to feel anxious and have obsessive thoughts again. I really don't want to go back on Anti-depressants. I felt good whilst I was on them, but I don't see them as a long-term solution and I am concerned about the negative health effects they have, even more so after suffering other physical withdrawal symptoms. Could my anxiety and obsessive thoughts be that the medication has now fully left my body and I am relapsing or could the anxiety and obsessive thoughts be withdrawal symptoms themselves? I'd be very grateful for any help or advice you have.
  4. Cut my Escitalopram dose from 10mg to 5mg about a month ago and doing fair. A little more anxious, I’m noticing. Have been on SSRI’s since about 1998. Have gone off of them for brief periods of time, but end up feeling like I’m spiraling downward again, and end up back on them. I feel like I have the right coping mechanisms at this point in my life, and really want to be free of this drug. Thought I’d try staying on the 5mg dose for a few months, then try to split the 1/2-pill into a 2.5mg and take that for a couple months, then maybe stop. I found this website on an internet search, trying to find some help, or at least learn of others who are going through similar experiences. Thank you. Jennifer
  5. In lexapro withdrawal for 7 months. Having high anxiety and negative thoughts and ruminations Never had this before coming off of lexapro. I want to be me again. I got on lexapro because when I would get angry with my kids when they were small my head felt like it would blow off. Got advice from some people that told me it was a chemical imbalance and that Paxil would help so I went and asked my dr for it. Took it for 4 or 5 years and then thought maybe it was the reason I was so sleepy all the time. Dr switched me to lexapro. Was feeling horrible a lot and went to the Dr on and off through the years but nothing was ever found so I just pushed through. In 2015 I started noticing I was feeling a lot worse and all the time and it was hard to do things and then I started acting different and reacting to people differently. I was 46 and thought it was the change and it was causing me to act that way. I got off lexapro to see if that would help but it evidently sent me into withdrawal.
  6. Hi folks, I have protracted withdrawal from three medications and now I am on disability. I am male 30s and no other health conditions (except for sleep apnea) Desvenlafaxine - took it for 8 months in 2020 and doctor tapered me in 2 weeks. I started developing severe insomnia and jerks. Doctor put me back on it and the problem became worse. I am not taking this medication anymore (last took in 2021). I still have the insomnia and jerks since past 3 years. Clonazepam - another doctor gave this to me for the symptoms of desvenlafaxine in late 2021 however I only got temporary relief. I was able to find a doctor to taper me off in February 2022 so I believe I am good here but I might have some cognition problems because of it. No longer taking it. Cipralex - I took this because I was going through benzo withdrawals from Clonazepam. Once I was put on a benzo taper with Clonazepam I was stable so I cut the dose from 10mg to 5mg in February 2022. Ever since then I am been experiencing some symptoms which have not gone away. I then went back up to 10mg and did a slow taper. Symptoms include: - cognition focus energy motivation - worsened anxiety and depression symptoms including chest pain, heart palpitations - breathing issues. Sometimes when I'm trying to sleep I get this sudden out of breath feeling I am currently on 0.8mg cipralex and plan to taper to 0.6/0.4/0.2 then 0.1 before getting off. I have seen various psychiatrists and they don't have any recommendations other than wait till I'm completely off, try ECT, ketamine or other medications etc... My sleep physician recommended gabapentin but I will not be taking that due to already having protracted withdrawal. I am waiting to see a movement disorder neurologist however that wait is around 12 months. I already saw a general neurologist and they did an EEG but nothing was found. Any tips on how I can deal with these withdrawal symptoms?
  7. Hello, first of all, excuse me for my English, which is not my language. I’m a 50 years old man, long term SSRI/SNRI user who is trying to survive after a lot of mistakes made with this poisons. First SSRI was prescribed me in 1998: a psychiatrist decided to solve my panic attacks, anxiety and fears to be sick with a 20 mg of paroxetine. My journey with SSRI began: I took paroxetine from 1998 to 2008; then escitalopram from 2008 to 2010; venlafaxine XR from 2011 to 2016. During this period, 3 or 4 times I attempted to stop but after six months free I reinstated the drug; my doctor said that the difficulty to stop was a problem of mine because “SSRI don’t give dependence” and anyway said “if necessary you can use it for all the life”. For sure from 2006 for me was IMPOSSIBLE to decrease paroxetine under 10 mg!!! From 2017 drugs seem not work as in the past: my doctor tries firstly with escitalopram (from december 2017 to august 2018), sertraline (from november 2018 to july 2019) and finally vortioxetine (november 2019 to february 2020). On february the 6th I took for last time vortioxetine which was giving to me just problems More than nine months have passed since then during which I experienced extremely heavy symptoms that reduced my mental energies and threw me into a profound discomfort that makes it increasingly difficult to carry out my normal activities. Some of the symptoms are those that I have already known in the past (although they present themselves in a more severe way): agitated anxiety; insomnia (I have occasionally taken xanax which fortunately I have used very rarely in these 20 years) and sudden and agitated awakenings; obsessive search for information and explanations about my malaise (via the internet). Others are new: an unbearable mood swings; a certain emotional lability (I get very easily moved and angry); physical symptoms such as fatigue with pain in particular in the legs and frequent palpitations. In the background then there are distressing thoughts for the future: evolution of my malaise (fear of irreversible damage to my nervous system induced by prolonged use of drugs). What seemed surprising was requent change in symptoms from week to week. At the end I found this site and with it a little hope: I have learned many things, even about my mistakes, and discovered that I’m not alone. Now I’m just surviving and my days are (very) often hard to pass, but there are moments (1 or 2 hours in a day) when I feel this journey through the hell is a long and necessary way to live again, to see the stars again. My long journey to healing has started, and I hope you would support me with your advice.
  8. Hi guys! Its been almost 7 months since I ct Lexapro, having only used it in 1 month om 5 mg. Its only now for the last weeks that the zaps, vertigo, flu-sympthoms and burning are starting, and becoming more severe by each day.. And I have a constant low fever since one month. (No virus.) Im burning all over my body, not sensitive to touch really.. Just feels like im on fire. And feels like breathing.. Sulfur. Not a refluxprob. (Also kinda blushing in face) All worse in my belly. Having attacks where it kinda knocks me with burning nerves all over and then goes back to constant medium-burning.. My cold sheets in bed is a blessing to naked skin! Also, notice aches and getting weaker in all my muscles.. 😕 Im so afraid! Whats going on! Have someone felt like this?
  9. Violets Escitalopram Lexapro Cipralex Protracted Withdrawal Hello everyone, I have been thinking of posting a success story for a while, and after some questions in my private messages, I have decided to return here to give some hope to the ones that are suffering with PSSD. Here is an excerpt from my original post about my experience back in 2019: "I started on 2,5mg escitalopram in december 2018 for GAD and severe depression by my GP. I gradually increased the dose up to 7,5mg and was on this dose for a couple of weeks (until january 7th) I then decided to taper down again, as the drug made me careless, emotionally numb, impaired my cognition and significantly decreased my libido. So I stopped it after 2 months (last 2,5mg pill taken 8th of february). Since stopping I suffered two weeks of acute physical withdrawal (flu-like symptoms, nausea, dizziness etc) but I thought that it would be over and I would go back to «normal», but now it is clear to me that I also suffer from protracted withdrawal and the symptoms are scary and debilitating. I suffer from parasthesia, brain zaps, tinnitus, severe derealization, emotional numbness and extreme apathy to a point where I can’t force myself to get up and eat. I feel completely braindead and my cognition is ruined, the past month has gone by in a haze and I can’t remember or recollect much of it. This is extremely terrifying and almost worse than the original depression. I feel dead, even though I’m alive." ______________________ I am happy to share that since then, I have pretty much recovered. From the very long list of symptoms that I suffered (anhedonia, complete apathy/avolition, complete emotional numbness (NO emotions at all), no feelings of hunger, no libido, full genital and nipple anesthesia, severe cognitive disfunction, muscle aches/wastage, changed hair structure, dry skin, no sweating, tinnitus, visual disturbances (some visual snow/unclear vision/focus), gum health issues, high pulse/breathing issues leading up to a week long hospital stay), I now only have one or two of those symptoms left, which are pretty minor anyways. That is some decrease in libido, as well as permanent tinnitus (barely noticeable), which are pretty insignificant at a greater scale of things. It took me about three months after cessation to start experience tiny improvements and it took me almost a year to start feeling somewhat like myself emotionally. The first thing to improve was my cognition, which started improving after about 3 months, then the anhedonia started to lift around the 6 month-mark, together with some of the physical symptoms. The emotional and the sexual dysfunctions were the last to go and improved majorly at the 1-1,5 year mark. I must note that I haven't taken any medications or specific supplements (other than some B-vitamins and Omega 3) ever since my horror experience with Lexapro and I am not planning on doing so either. Therefore, I do consider my "recovery" natural. Anyways, now, after three years, I think it is safe to say that I am fully recovered and I am mostly back to my "old" self. I have since graduated at my university, gotten to experience amazing new things and places and also managed to find a loving partner. Even though life still gets hard at times (like it does for the most of us), and I still have days where the depression rears its ugly head, I now have found ways to deal with it, knowing it's only temporary. I also feel like this entire PSSD-experience has made me a lot more resilient and I want people in a similar situation to know, that there is definitely hope, no matter how many symptoms they experience and how hopeless it might feel at the moment. Best, Violets
  10. Hi everyone, It's been awhile. I made a post here back in Dec. 2017 and thought to give everyone an update on my situation. Really didn't think I'd visit here again and post in this section, but here we are! To give you a brief summary of my situation (linked my post/story for more details), I was on Lexapro/Cipralex/Escitalopram for over 9 years; dose ranging between 5mg-20mg. At the time of my post, I thought it was a hopeless situation and was never going to recover. Seeing how few success stories there were, I thought there were little-to-no-chance of me recovering considering how long I was on the medication + marijuana usage. My main issues at the time (7 months into cold-turkey quitting) was the deterioration of my brain functions. I wasn't only feeling "depressed" because of the drug and my environmental situation, but was feeling "chemically broken" from the ground up. All my bodily functions were seemingly failing. It forgot how to operate; basic functions, thought processes, emotional and stress control seemed impossible to manage. I had couple options to choose from at the time: 1) Give up all hope, rot away, waste my life until I eventually take my own life. 2) Go back on the medication OR go on another medication (like my family doctor recommended) 3) Stick it out, sacrifice these months/years to hopefully recover. I can't tell you how close I was to choosing option 2), I even took ~2 pills of my medication before throwing it out and sticking it out with 3). But there was one post here in THIS section specifically that ultimately gave me the courage to try and beat this thing: the recovery story from pug. (link below as well) After reading his story, I told myself, "Ethan, 2 years, sacrifice 2 years, you might still hate yourself, you might never recover but you never know until you try. Quit and stick it out for 2 years, and see what happens." I did just that and after ~1.5 years of stopping escitalopram, I slowly started feeling human again. I was able to slowly get my life together. I have more ambition and drive than ever. Maybe due to the fact knowing this drug wasted so many years, and that I HAVE to catch up. I can actually feel sadness, happiness; not needing marijuana to feel genuine emotions and not needing the SSRI to feel functional again. It made me realize the source of my marijuana addiction was to counter-act the numbness Cipralex brought on. Long story short, a part of me thought this journey was nonrecoverable; but I was wrong. I don't think I'm fully healed yet, and honestly don't think I'll ever be (Sorry, always been a cup-half-empty kind of guy). But there is hope in getting better, and I believe in that. I'll go on to say that quitting cold-turkey might not be the most appropriate way; but I was fortunate enough to have my parents help me out at the time. I'll even go on to say that maybe the medication short term isn't that bad for you per say; maybe it can save some people from the brink of killing themselves, but I genuinely think these drugs hurt you more the longer you take them. If I had a choice, I wish to have never touched this drug. I wish all of you on this journey nothing but the best; and hope one day, you will join pug and myself to tell this side of the story. Sincere regards, Ethan
  11. Wanted to introduce myself and ask for some help. So 3 months ago I had a couple of panic attacks and was feeling in dire need of help. Doc offered Xanax and asked if I wanted to start an ssri. In my desperation I said yes. Well for 5-6 weeks just felt terrible. Eventually I was able to mostly live normally apart from needing to use the bathroom upon waking and waking up early and wired (6am). Went back to doc for refill appointment. Said I wasn't interested in continuing and want to get back to drugless before considering anything else. He wasn't even planning on giving me a refill to taper with. I had to ask since I had some work travel "oh 3 months isn't that much deal with withdrawal" So I got a month of 5mg. Used 5mg for a week and honestly felt pretty great. No more morning stress and found myself sleeping in longer (catch 22 if you ask me). For the next week, using mark harrowitz 7week schedule (3ng dose) I cut the pill roughly in half and would take the bigger peice. Looks like 3mg to me. Well day 2 of that rolls around and I wake with uncomfortable dreams and anxiety early in the morning. A couple hours later I took the other half of tablet and was feeling better within an hour. I repeated the same thing last night and this morning. I'm feeling a little unsure at this point whether to continue or to ask for more pills. What is the general experience with 3months usage of Lexapro.
  12. Hi, my name is Bjorn, I've been a long time reader of this website since my problems with AD withdrawal I experience(d) and decided to sign up for an account to make a post about myself and to maybe get some input from other members about my situation. For whole my life (39 years old now) I've never had any mental problems, I always was a strong person who went through bad periods without any problems, till in 2018 my mother-in-law died very suddenly. I lost every sense of being, got anxiety, felt wrong aswell physical as emotional and didn't knew what happened. Naturally, I got my doctor involved, had some bloodwork done and my wife insisted that they also looked at my testosterone levels. When the blood work returned, most of it was fine, but my testosterone levels were indeed way off, like below half what was minimally recommended for a healthy male person. So then the whole story began, doctor told me that it was possible because of the stressfull and emotional period I was going through that a depression set in which made those T levels completely tank, so the solution was, AD's. He put me on 5 mg escitalopram and 25 mg trazodone to help with insomnia (which I developed in that period of high stress). It took a while for everything to lighten up a bit and after several months I was fairly functional, but I started getting heartflutters/heart skipping beats which made me scared, so for which I decided to stop the AD's. I did (no taper, completely CT) and for a while it went good, till after several months I started feeling depressed again and the doctor advised me to reinstate the 5 mg escitalopram again, which I reluctantly did. Took a while again to get "normal" again and I kept taking the AD from about mid 2019 till beginning of 2022 at which point i had enough of all the AD taking and talked to my doctor about quitting, on which he replied to start taking one day on and one day off (very bad move with escitalopram because the half life of the drug made it so i was acutally creating a WD every other day.) till I decided myself to quit the AD completely and go through what was to come. I expected the WD and with my quitting in 2019 I already experienced the brain zaps (which I actually didn't find that big of a bother the 2nd time because I knew what it was and I realised WD was ongoing). After a while the brainzapping stopped and I felt pretty ok, had a little relapse of WD around the end of 2022 (around the 10 month mark) for which I contacted my doctor again, who of course tried to get me on the AD again and I said "NOPE, I need to get through this without any drugs to get better myself" and after about 2 weeks it mostly resolved and I was able to do what needed to be done again, like work, relationship etc. Which I also should mention, related to the low testosterone levels, I went to see doctors about that too and after many tests the conclusion was that I have secondary hypogonadism, so they started me on a topical gel of administering testosterone every morning which helped in getting my T levels back to where they should and I also asked to go on Tadalafil 5 mg daily for PSSD which also developed because of the AD. PSSD also solved itself, but if it's because of the Tadalfil or my raised T levels, I don't know. What I also take is daily magnesium because I know it helps with general health and I know this site "recommends" it for people with PAWS alongside omega 3, but that's something I don't take (yet). Back to now, so since the end of 2022 till about 3-4 weeks ago I felt "normal", had no problems or none which I can really think of, but 3 - 4 weeks ago I woke up from my sleep having shortness of breath, feeling panicky, went back to sleep but started to think about it a got a bit scared. Also my daughter, who's 15 years old, started having some puberty problems which caused some serious fights at home, both affecting me and my wife pretty bad mentally and as of last week I feel like **** again. Insomnia, globus feeling (tension around my throat), very emotional, anxiety, panic attacks, the whole lot. I'm feeling very dreadful at the moment. The globus feeling has gone away a bit, it's not constantly there anymore, but everything is making me very scared. I wake up very often during sleep (if i can sleep that is) with my heart racing, shortness of breath, feeling panicky. Had my bloodwork done again last week, but everything turned out fine, even cortisol levels, which i expected to be high, but they were normal. Doctor prescribed me Sulpiride, to take a quarter of a pill (which comes down to 50mg) to alleviate symptoms, but I'm very reluctant to do so because I know it can have severe adverse reactions and I don't want to add any side effects of that antipsychotic to what i'm already feeling. Any advice on this, someone? I'm aware of the windows and waves pattern, is it possible that I'm in a wave now? This would be the 20 month mark of being of any AD, so I would thin if it's a wave that it wouldn't be so bad, but this one is very bad. Sorry to make this story so long, I could make it longer but I just wanted to write down what's happening to me just to see if I would get a reply and maybe even a reply which could calm me down a bit. Greetings.
  13. Hello, I'm new to this website and so happy to have found this community! I've been on lexapro since 2020 and have been trying to come off it for about a year now. I am on 2.5mg at the moment. The next drop I can go to when cutting my pills is not very accurate at approx 1.7mg. When I do this the withdrawals are very bad. The typical one is the dizzy spells, but I also feel very emotionally unstable. I've seen three doctors now, (one of which was my doctor of 25 years who put be on the medication) and they have all been extremely unhelpful and very judgmental, often making me feel like its my fault that I am reacting so badly and I should stay on the medication. It seems from reading on here that this is quite a common experience for doctors. I want to be able to taper in smaller doses but I find it very hard with the pills as they are very small. I've been suggested to get the liquid form, but apparently the only available liquid in Australia can only go down in 1mg doses, which is too much for me. Is there a way to dilute the liquid form so I can go down in smaller doses? I can get the pills compounded but it is very expensive so I was hoping to try the liquid form first. Thanks so much advance for your advice! Milena
  14. Hi everyone, I wish I found this website before all my previous attempts to stop SSRIs. I’m grateful that this website exist. My story with ADs began in 2015, after a “diagnosis” for OCD (had the mildest tendencies), and recommended to go on an SSRIs. I was introduced to the whole “chemical imbalance” theory and both the therapist and GP assured me that the drug is safe, easy to stop with no long term side effects! so I took the decision to try ADs which turned out to be a huge mistake and an ongoing cycle of being on ADs and WDs. ADs and WDs timeline: 2015-2017 : on Cipralex 10-20 mg (short taper, 15-10-5-0 mg). 2017-2018: off Cipralex, withdrawal. Was recommended to go back on Cipralex for the second time due to a “relapse”. Dec 2018 - march 2020: on Cipralex for the 2nd time, between 10-20 mg. Alternating between 10, 15 20 mg trying to figure out what works throughout the “treatment” (3 months taper or less) March 2020-oct 2020: of Cipralex. Second withdrawal, started with dizziness, depression, fatigue.. etc and by the 6th month, turned into constant panic attacks, severe DPDR and agoraphobia. It was was unbearable, I couldn’t function. Drs dismissed that its withdrawal since the severe symptoms started 6 months after and gave a “diagnosis” for panic disorder. Before ADs, I never had these issues. I was desperate and agreed to go back on ADs but asked for a different one. Oct 2020-March 2022: on Prozac 20 mg. 3rd time on SSRIs. Suffered from common side effects (as well as on Cipralex before), but noticed some previous WD symptoms remained while on Prozac (got milder), like DR, anxiety, fatigue, cold like symptoms, socially withdrawn. I think my body didn’t adjust well due to CNS becoming highly sensitive after the previous WD. I was functioning but not living. (3 months taper, 18,15,12,10,7,5,3,0 mg), thinking the problem was tapering method and not length, got both wrong. March 2022 - April 2023 (13 months): off Prozac, severe withdrawal.. Current WD timeline and symptoms: The first 6 months off of Prozac: internal buzz, tingling legs, insomnia, DPDR, flu like symptoms, dizziness, gut issues, etc., but I managed to function to some extent. By the 7th month: I started experiencing crippling symptoms, including peripheral neuropathy symptoms, tingling on legs and feet hand arms and other parts, burning and numbness legs/arms/head, light, sound, and smell sensitivities, strong internal buzz, gut issues, vertigo, tinnitus on/off, closed eyes visions, strange nerve throbbing sensations, chronic fatigue, coordination issues, dizziness, dehydration, PSSD, doom, agoraphobia, OCD, zaps, mini seizures, internal buzz, gut issues, health anxiety and DPDR and more. This lasted 4 months in its severity. Was bedridden 90% of my day. PTSD symptoms, shock, and disbelief from my experience with SSRIs and WDs. By month 11 off: changed my diet, few symptoms improved (some improved in severity while would fade and return), the rest remained. I developed new symptoms, mostly cognitive, like brain fog and brain pressure, anhedonia, difficulty speaking, memory and imagination issues. Now 13 month off: some symptoms resolved, some improved, some remained and some got worse like tinnitus (all the time now), and PSSD. Still unable to function, and under immense pressure to. Drs keep suggesting SSRIs, and at desperate times, I wonder if it’s a good idea to go back on SSRIs only to taper correctly and stabilize my CNS, after knowing the information on tapering now. This feels like a defeat after waiting and struggling for more than a year with withdrawal (and all the years before that). I think I’m kindled, cuz every time I've been on ADs or gone through WD again, both experiences got worse. I don’t know whats best at this stage, and confused by the conflicting claims online and from Drs. I would appreciate any support, recommendations and encouragements.
  15. So I'd share my story, about importance of both slowly getting off any drugs, not mixing another, importance of supplements proven here like Omega, Magnesium, Vitamins and reinstating as the only proven way of alleviating many symptoms. I must say that there is no "one size fits it all", but this is my advice for anyone getting off of ADs. Basically, I was prescribed Lexapro, more than 5 years ago, for few months. I went off to quikcly, fast taper in 1,5 months, instead of holding smaller doses, especially since I had big tolerance and my withdrawal even cold turkey was manageable, hard due to blunted emotions but even THEN I could function, so smaller drops would most likely caused no problems at all, but I was impatient like MANY people. Then after 1 month I reinstated, and due to various supplements that I took my body was dysregulated so first advice - don't try any unproven herbs or whatever you want to take to "heal" yourself and what folks on another forums with various unproven theories say, the only proven things that you can try is what is written here, proven by many users - Omega 3, Magnesium, B vitamins - granted, some people have bad reaction to some vitamins but body still need them, so always the best to try small doses and doing proper lab testing, especially for D3, B12 for any comorbid vit deficiency which can cause problems in the first place as well. Then in 2021 I took more supplements like CDP Choline and it caused various problems like vasodilation on arms and legs, weight loss, I was in post-reinstate state, I could go back to small dose lexapro anytime, but my Body coudn't 'click' to get back in place. It turned out after accutane therapy 6 months ago that the things that I overlooked were vitamins, but never really believed that I could be deficient, nor that it could cause problems since I'm non-vegetarian and took some vitamins there and there or that it coudl help. I didn't test right away, after accutane I had chronic depression (I wasn't depressed after lexapro at all), tinnitus, chonic fatigue, it turned out that after B9 and B12 all my symptoms went away, more over, after adding good b complex I started to heal from withdrawal caused by Lexapro as well - I also test do D3 often and now it's in 70s instead of 20s). My B12 was in low high 400s but my doc didn't test me for homocysteine or folate, but told me, that empiricism is good indicator of underlying functional B12 deficiency, since folate and B12 may test false high after current supplementation or B12 shots - B12 deficiency group on reddit is good resource for anyone dealing with this. So I had both some withdrawal symptoms from lexapro and B12 deficiency, but my deficiency based on my symptoms progressed way after discontinuation, so this isn't "it all B12" in my case, rather it's B12 depletion over of period of time that made my nervous system harder to fully get back on track and accutane by fully depleting my B vitamins (there are papers stating that isotretinoin causes depletion of all vitamins, especially ones with short half life like B2 and folate, my friend who works as pharmaceutical lawyer also said that B vitamin depletion is common in most drug therapies, especially B12) actually saved me. So, if I have advice for anyone suffering from ADs withdrawal and things like pssd, mostly people who are desperate who want it all quickly: - taper slowly, don't panic, get Omega 3, magnesium, if you can take B and ADEK vitamins starting with smaller doses that's great, or better do a test - whole vitamin panel is the best, including MTHFR mutation - things written here actually. - if you have some withdrawal, or symptoms like pssd, but withdrawal itself wasn't problematic, it always the best to reinstate the same drug in very small dose that caused that in first place, and be patient with stabilizing, rather than trying everything possible as magic pill, especially since many people get pssd and blunted emotions ONLY once they jump off - don't go into rabbit hole of alternatives experiments, like hormones, stacking 10 supplements etc. to "cure" you because it most likely only cause more harm than good both in liver, nervous system and don't be "i know better, it's all because [mechanism of ADs] and another theory, i'm right" like many folks on various forums. The only proven thing is to slowly taper, reinstate, staying away from both other pharmaceutical drugs and psychoactive drugs like weed, unless you have ynderlying condition, but always be careful and don't do it unless really necessary. I can't guarantee that everyone will recover from either pssd (it's more than that - there is whole emotional numbness, I had sexual function like 80% of the time, it's about getting all emotion and nervous system back on track, many people overlook it) or long-term withdrawal, but there is much higher chance you will if you won't go into rabbit hole of basically turning your body into big lab rat and maybe also damaging liver or other organs in the process, that;s why comorbid deficiencies are important, do a homocysteine test, your D3 etc to make sure your body has everything to function on basic level. If someone has questions, I can engage in discussion regarding my experience dealing both with withdrawal from AD and B12 deficiency if anyone is suffering from that as well - there many cofactors that are important as well. Right now i'm almost fully recovered, basically I got slight B6 toxicity on top of everything and everything overlap byt my body is like 90-95% like it was pre lexapro and it's only getting better.
  16. Hi! I just started to taper and I am in my second week of reducing from 20mg escitalopram. I already cut off 10%. What I find confusing: 1. Does it matter if I just take on ONE randomly chosen day 10% less (which I did already) or do I have to distribute the 10% cut throughout the 2 weeks? I can't see how the latter would be possible, given the infinitesimal amount that needs to be reduced this way, but I thought I will ask anyway :)> 2. Whilst I am aware of the huge variability in individual histories, I wonder if anyone here has been experiencing gradual tapering (as advised per medication here) and had withdrawal effects that were bearable and short-lived? In other words, if one does it right, generally speaking, and assuming that one is only on one antidepressant and all other variables are more or less constant, does it help avoid the worse of withdrawal effects? This is something that I am confused about. It is important for me, if any data, anecdotal or scientific exists in regard to this matter. Where can I look for this kind of information? Many thanks.
  17. hillsandvalleys

    hillsandvalleys

    Hello all, just posting as a new member here. Prescribed 10 mg Lexapro in 2008 after a relationship breakup. Since then have made roughly 5 attempts to wean off, but have been unable to. During the almost 15 years of taking Lexapro, I have mostly taken 5 mg and been ok on that. My most recent attempt to discontinue Lexapro ( after reducing dose to 5 mg every other day, prior) was from late March to mid-May 2023, by which time I was quite distressed and struggling to cope. I then reinstated at 10 mg, and continued at that dose until mid-August when I reduced to roughly 7.5 mg . After learning about very graduated tapering recently, I have been able to obtain the liquid form of Lexapro in 20 mg/ml and plan to commence at 7 mg equivalent. Given that historically I have been stable on 5 mg, this would seem to be a safe startng point. Of course, given that reasoning, maybe I could shorten the tapering process by starting at 5 mg, maybe staying there for 8 weeks to ensure no emergence of symptoms, as it seems to take anywhere between 4 and 8 weeks for my symptoms to manifest in a definite way . Apologies if I have not kept to the guidelines here ; i was not quite sure what to put where ! thankyou all for running this site, so much appreciated.
  18. Hello everyone I recently signed up to the SA forum and thought I'd introduce myself. 57yo male here living in Malaysia. I moved here recently (early retirement) from Australia. My GP in Australia put me on Citalopram (initially 20mg, then subsequently 40mg daily) for anxiety/depression (and related alcohol dependency) almost 30 years ago. When I moved to Malaysia last year I discovered that GP's don't prescribe antidepressants. Instead you have to see a psychiatrist. So I went to see one who switched me from Citalopram to Escitalopram (Lexapro). I mentioned that I would like to look at coming off antidepressants, so he prescribed 10mg of Lexapro (as opposed to 20mg which would have been equivalent to the 40mg of citalopram). I didn't notice any adverse effects with the reduced dose. A couple of months ago, I thought I'd half the dosage again, and so tried taking 5mg of Lexapro for a couple of days. Big mistake. I ended up having a sudden panic attack in a busy shopping mall. It was horrible. I felt completely overwhelmed, thoughts of impending doom and just sheer panic. My partner could see my state of distress so we quickly returned home and I took the extra 5mg. Since then, I resumed the 10mg a day dose. Recently, there was a 4Corners documentary on TV that showed other people having the same difficulty coming off SSRI's and it was reassuring (although disturbing) to find that many other people are in the same situation. Up until then, I had no idea about having to taper off these meds and the severity of the withdrawal effects. The documentary also mentioned this website (and the accounts of other "survivors"), which is thankfully how I ended up here. So, I've bought myself a small digital weighing scale and a pill crusher and have started my journey of a gradual taper.. Anyhow, just thought I'd say hello and provide a brief intro.. Thank you for providing this valuable forum. _________ Wednesday 6 September - Wednesday 20 September 2023 - 9mg Lexapro
  19. Was on lexapro for about 7 months at 20 mg.. all in the past month and a half I tapered off to nothing stopped for a week and started having muscle weakness and typical withdrawal symptoms .. on day 6 I started having ringing in ear and dizziness and brain for so I started back at 5 mg.. today is day 4 and I’m still feeling terrible what do I do
  20. Hi everybody! I am Julz, a 33 year-old female - polydrugged to my eye-balls Ten years ago, I fell into anorexia and depression, soon unveiling terrible anxiety. I was referred to a psychiatrist (in France) who prescribed me medication and also gave me psychotherapy. Regarding the medication, different combinations and doses where tried and I eventually found myself on a prescription which seemed to suit my troubled mind (Escitalopram, venlafaxine, clonazepam and diazepam) - did it ever do anything? I still haven't got a clue. I trusted this doctor. This is my initial prescription: Escitalopram: 20mg 20mg 20mg - (yes, that is 60mg...!!!) Venlafaxine(MR): - - 75mg - Clonazepam: - 2mg - 2mg Diazepam: - - - 10mg Time passed and psychologically, a lot changed. I moved away from where I used to live, totally changed my environment, and went for a fresh start. But I was still taking my medication as prescribed. My General Practitioner (in charge of my prescription in my new environment) convinced me to lower the Escitalopram (on the grounds that it was "bad for my heart") and I managed, between 2011 and 2013, to come from 60mg/day to 15mg. How? By jumping 5mg at a time every now and again. I had no idea... again, I more or less trusted this doctor who was willing to prescribe me the drugs I was clearly physically dependent on. The withdrawals I experienced were uneventful. I did feel something was happening but within a few days, I always felt the same as before the drop. Between 2010 and 2014, a LOT had changed as I finally got an MSc BUT I had fallen into terrible exhaustion and had no life. How did I get my degree? A struggle every day. I then began to question this cocktail of drugs, I'd been on them for 10 years and was still taking them as prescribed because I was physically dependent. That was clear enough! It then hit me: my meds were probably incapacitating me rather than providing any help! The realisation came as in January 2013, after I managed to lower my Escitalopram intake from 20 to 15mg/day in a single 5mg step (...), I began to feel even more tired during the day, exhausted - I simply had to nap every single day. After some personal research, I went to my GP and told him I didn't believe in keeping our focus on the Escitalopram because it seemed that the more I decreased it, the more sleepy I'd get during the day, considering my benzo intake (at that point, I was taking 3 hours' naps), and I could not live like that! Fortunately, before I was able to drop a pill here and there as instructed by my GP, I found the BenzoBuddy website and managed to find a taper method to gradually come off clonazepam. From December 2014 to July 2015, I came from 4mg to 2mg and am now below 1.9mg and still tapering off successfully. I decided to join Surviving Antidepressants as I want off ALL any medication which alters who I am. I believe in other ways to manage my weaknesses - I am not ill, I have a tendency to be anxious and this is not new, I was an anxious child but I had emotions too. I'd like my emotions and my whole life back... I realise I know NOTHING about anti-depressants, I surely did not know about Escitalopram's potency and am still in shock from the news. My initial plans (supported by a psychiatrist I saw in February 2015) were to come off clonazepam (bz), then diazepam (bz), then Escitalopram, then Venlafaxine. In the light of what I read on this wonderful site, I wonder whether I should stay of Valium (diazepam) while at least tapering off Escitalopram, when I am done with clonazepam... I realise I need knowledge myself because sadly, doctors haven't been helpful at all... so far... Thanks for welcoming me on your wonderful Forum! Julz xxx
  21. I have been on Lexapro 5 mg for roughly 2 years now. These last couple of months I made the decision to want to discontinue Lexapro, so I started a taper down to 2.5 mg for one month. Recently I made the switch to 1.5 mg and I missed a couple of dosages. It was then I started to experience, what I think are withdrawal symptoms. Irritability Heart Palpitations Crying Spells Anxiety & Depression Panic Attacks I spoke to my Psychiatrist and she told me that it was not WS, but instead Rebound Systems. She explained that my body needs the medication. She also mentioned that it was unlikely that I would have WS with such a low dosage. Is this true? Has anyone else experienced WS with such a low dosage? I’ve been doings loads of reading on here, so I hope that I can stabilize with 2.5 mg soon! I’m curious to know when ppl have stabilized and how long it took for everyone to reach stability.
  22. Hi, i am 29 years old and going thru hellish WD symptoms. I quit CT after my psychiatrist told me my AD was just a placebo and that I could stop taking it after 1 week of tapering. I am so mad for how stupid I was to believe him. I got off my AD in December 2017 because I wanted to get pregnant. I actually have been having neurological symptoms for the past 5 years and had been on my AD for 10 years. And my anxiety has been bad for the past 2 years. I always thought the neurological symptoms were anxiety but now maybe they are a side effect of the drug? I tried to get back on my AD to stabilize but it made me feel so sick. I’m asking because you said you are stabilizing on Prozac. I have never heard of someone stabilizing on a different drug that wasn’t their original AD. I was just wondering if you could elaborate just because I am curious. I am considering trying a different AD just to stabilize because this is pure hell on earth. I have an appointment with a holistic doctor next month but I don’t want to put all my eggs in one basket.
  23. Hello there everybody, I am Dara. Forgive my English, I grew up in Europe and not my first language is English. So I was on SSRI and other meds after being scare of pandemic and not wanting to leave house. So for two years I was on Lexapro and sometimes Xanax. I try other meds like Wellbutrin because Lexapro made me not interested in physical with my husband. But after I stop, have hed zap, headache, but still function. Few months later, I feel very strange, like I can feel no joy or love and thing no working right. I try maca, I try tea, I try yoga. Nothing happens and I get very scared and anxiety. i try other supplement that makes me very sick and not sleep and have tremor. I go to hospital, they put on more meds saying anxiety is much more bad, and I was on a few things for a month before having something like can't sit down at night and again no sleep and feel very weird like I am so angry and dark. I stop those meds and just stay on sleep med not benzo sleep med, but new one Dayvigo and Doctor add beta blocker. Things seem better, then again no sleep, and i worry so, stop Dayvigo. It was okay and I feel good, then bad again, but now, things seem to be more okay. Like a few weeks I felt more good and even happy. Sleeping some. Still no passion and not me, but can be calm and okay and do other things. Then some nights very bad, no sleep and scared. But don't want to change any more. So i am on Inderal- 60 mg. I been doing just okay enough to feel okay. Not working, not loving, but alive and getting better bit more. Not every day better, but looking back, trend is better like stock market go up even with dips sometimes. I okay I feel more regular, even though not me, so good, i can get better. Good enough for me for now. But lately i am very scared about other things happening to stop getting good and don't know what to do. Yesterday I got small punctor in my heel from furnutire staple on couch. It went in heel, I jump up and say OW and look at foot to see small drop of blood. So I wash and clean and call my doctor. He say last Tetanus was more than 10 years before. So I worry now, do I get this innoculation or not because it was not outside and not rusty but also I don't know. Doc says could do either way, get it not get it. I don't know. I don't drink alcohal, I eat pretty healthy foods. But I don't know what else is problem for this sichuation. I didn't think supplements make big problem and they did. I didn't think withdrawl was a thing and it was. So now I don't know- inoculation can make me feel worse and withdrawal again? I also worried about tetans! Don't want either thing or nother bad thing to happen again. I just need to get better. My question is, what to do about things like tetans inoculation and avoiding other things to get better. I look here for experience, but only few people mention tetanus and some okay and some not. i have this akethesia before, this insomnia, nerve issue, low feeling of void, and don't want to go back there now things bit better here and there. Any advise? ALso, I don't have regular menstruation. Few months nothing. Now, I got yesterday and I noticce week before felt worse again, like going crazy sometimes and feeling like worse times from before. So if i get inoculation I don't know what is withdrawal inoculation or period or all. Danke - Dana
  24. -- Here is my intro topic -- It has officially been ONE WHOLE YEAR of all of this discontinuation nightmare since I stopped taking Lexapro as of tomorrow! 364 days no Lexapro. I'm SO excited to finally be able to say I've almost fully healed. Your day is coming too! I could not have gone through this without this website and because of that, I am forever grateful. Here is some background on my journey and my healing process. I apologize for the long post, but I want to be detailed in my post so others can hopefully gain some insight / information, and I want somewhere where all of this is documented in one place. Mid March 2018 - Started taking 10m Lexapro (escitalopram) daily when my doctor said it might help with my random chest discomforts. She had some scans done on me and blood tests etc to rule anything serious out, and told me if might be anxiety induced discomfort. I did a tiny bit of research, and jumped on the SSRI bandwagon. April 8th, 2018 - Stopped taking Lexapro cold turkey because it hadn't done anything for me. This was 3 weeks of taking the Lexapro daily. I didn't know anything about lowering dosages / tapering at all. My doctor didn't mention anything so I just stopped taking it. April 15th, 2018 - This is the exact day my discontinuation symptoms started and it hit like a TRUCK. I had no idea they were from stopping the Lexapro either. I all of the sudden had a TERRIBLE panic attack. My arm felt stiff, my vision started to tunnel, it was hard to focus on my breathing and my heads were ice cold and sweating profusely. I told my wife to call 911 I think I'm having a heart attack. I thought I was seconds away from dying and it was so scary. I'll never forget that moment. The paramedics told me I was fine, checked my vitals and asked me if I take any medication. I said "I don't have a history of medication, but I did just stop taking Lexapro last week, but I only took it for 3 weeks". The paramedics said "Bingo, that's your problem". I kinda shrugged it off and for the next week everything was relatively normal. April 22th, 2018 - My wife and I were going to the park for an earth day celebration. It was beautiful out and everything was great. We took a trolley to the park and it was about a 20 minute ride. We got there, everything was fine, and then boom. Heart started pounding and I got lightheaded. I felt VERY odd. I told my wife I needed to sit down and call my doctor. No answer, it was the weekend. No problem, I said. Let's get back on the trolley and leave, and go to urgent care. It was the longest 20 minutes of my life. On the trolley I felt very claustrophobic and a panic attack set in. I did nothing but focus on my breathing and trying to stay positive, but I felt lightheaded, my chest felt very hot and was very tight. We finally got back to my car and went straight to an urgent care down the street. They looked at me like I was an idiot and they gave me some benadryl via IV to "calm me down" This made me incredibly dizzy and more light headed than before. For some reason I was going in and out of panic every 10 minutes. For the rest of the day my wife and I laid outside on a blanket, she read a book and I tried to sleep but woke up in a panic every five minutes. Life for my at this point was VERY, VERY tough and I had no idea what was happening to me and was very, very scared. I thought back to what the paramedics said about the Lexapro inducing that first panic attack. I did some light googling and found a lot of threads on Reddit about SSRI discontinuation and I eventually found this website as well. It finally hit me that I was 100% going through discontinuation. I became a google master like the rest of us trying to figure out why we go through this, how long this will last for, cold turkey vs taper, etc. I LIVED on this website reading every thread I could find. I googled and searched here for every new symptom I got. I developed a VERY, VERY bad health anxiety. I have very good insurance with my company and am very grateful for that because I went to the doctor once every 2-3 weeks when I got new symptoms. The doctor that initially gave me the Lexapro told me symptoms would only last for up to 2 weeks and they will be mild. I stayed with her until about 1 month off at which point she became annoyed with my visits and basically told me this is all in my head and that I needed therapy. Lol? That was a joke, because my symptoms were very pronounced. I called around and found a new doctor who was younger and might understand more. He was a joke and a waste of my time. I only saw him for one visit. I got VERY lucky and found my new doctor (the one I have now kept for a year and am very grateful for and pleased with). She told me what I'm going through is normal and could last a few months up to around 6 months. In reality, I know a lot of us go through this for a year or multiple years, up to 5 or more years. I had her refer me to multiple specialists (cardiologists, neurologists, etc). I got multiple tests done on my heart such as EKGs, stress tests, and multi-day holtor monitors. I had multiple scans done - CT scans, MRIs, etc. All of these tests and visits were done over the course of 6-8 months and every single test came back clean. Since the start of my discontinuation, I had rotating symptom periods. Every 3 or 4 weeks, my symptoms would change. Either brand new symptoms or previous symptoms came back and my current symptoms would go away. Here is a laundry list of symptoms that I have gone through, in no particular order. General anxiety, Health anxiety, panic attacks, night terrors, fatigue, dizziness, light head, nausea, heart palpitations, shortness of breath, claustrophobia, loss of sleep, brain zaps, head pressure, weight gain, eye pain, heart zaps, jolting awake at night, depression, tinnitus, jaw tightness, head tingles, loss of ability to focus, and many more symptoms that I can't remember. I tried everything to combat these symptoms and not much worked other than time. I tried vitamins, diet changes, melatonin for sleep, fish oil, exercise (this was harder to do the more severe my symptoms got), CBD oil, therapy, essential oils, and more.I will say, even if it was placebo, CBD oil (no THC content) did seem to help my general anxiety and chest tightness. I would take it sublingually once in the morning and once at night. Melatonin did help a lot with my sleep. Most melatonin comes in 1gram servings but I broke these up and only took 250mg a few nights a week. It was more than enough to help. I will say some of the biggest things that helped was keeping my mind off of reality as much as possible. Focusing extra hard at work, watching comedy TV shows, browsing this website, and cuddling with my wife. There were weekends I didn't leave my bed and we watched TV all day and it was so comforting. Also, when it was warm out, I would walk. I would walk A LOT. Sometimes I walked for 2 or 3 hours and just sweat and sweat and it felt so great. I doubt these had a direct affect on my healing process, but it's all about keeping your mind off of reality in any way you can. After all, as Aeroman said, it really is just time that is the biggest factor in healing. My healing journey consisted of continuous misery for the first 2 month followed by windows and waves (definitely way more waves than windows) for 3-5 months. Then more continuous misery for 2 months. For the past 4 months I've been in the windows and waves pattern again, but this time, way more windows than waves. There's no way I can pinpoint the exact minute, or day, or even week where I knew I was almost done healing, it happens gradually. But as of today, I've been in a window for a full straight 6 weeks. I have very, very minor symptoms left over, but I am optimistic these will fade over the next few months. I would say I'm 90-95% fully healed. if you asked me 6 months ago, I would say I was at 50-60%. I understand I might still have some waves ahead of me, but I am no longer scared of symptoms to come. I am stronger than this and I've made it through the worst. This journey has changed my life in so many ways, but it's definitely made me appreciate life more now. Thank you everyone from Surviving Antidepressants. From the bottom of my heart, you guys are sincerely awesome and I couldn't have done this without you guys. I hope all of you still suffering will get through this, sooner rather than later. Be strong, stay positive, and keep in mind that EVERYONE heals after time. SupahSet
  25. Hello, I quit drinking alcohol 11 years ago and a doctor at that time thought the anti depressant Zoloft would be beneficial for my "anxiety" from quitting. This is how I started using these drugs. It has taken me forever to finally quit. I'm a 43 year old male. I've quit Lexapro 2.5 mg 24 days ago and have had the worst three day stretch to date. I feel extremely tired and fatigued. I feel symptoms of brain fog, memory failures, cognitive decline, crying spells, sadness, slight headache, head pressure, eyes tired, some body ache, and slight brain zaps. I'm trying to stay positive and day to day but this is brutal. I feel like a zombie and would just want to sleep. I also have mild sleep apnea in which I have started using a cpap machine a week ago but have found no relief. I think I'm going to stop using the Cpap machine for a month to rule out the machine being the cause for recent three day stretch. I want to believe that the withdrawal symptoms are what is causing me to feel this way but I'm unsure now. I have always had some of the described symptoms on a day to day basis before. These symptoms went as far back as the last two to three years. They weren't nearly as severe. I haven't heard of anyone having the described symptoms as a result of actively taking the antidepressant drug. If this is something that can be confirmed I would feel much more at ease as I would have to wait out the withdrawal process. I guess I am looking for words of encouragement and hopefully some validation that these symptoms are from the withdrawal and this is a normal process. Last night I started myofacial exercises as an alternative to the cpap. I know it will be sometime before I see any benefit from them. I also ran 2 miles yesterday. This morning I practiced some Pranayama and will continue this daily. I'd appreciate any feedback and thank you for reading my story. Matthew
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