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  1. Hello everyone and can I start by saying how glad I am that I found thus site. I've done nothing except read as much as I can about PAWS since it hit me nearly 2 weeks ago and on sheer popularity alone this site seems to be the one I've settled on. My story is one that started in Mt Kate teens when as a result of alcohol abuse I began to develop anxiety symptoms which I then proceeded to compound with a never ending cycle ogself medication with more alcohol and sometimes illicit drugs. Anyway to cut a long story short after 10-15 years of this I managed to defeat the worst of the alcohol binging and then illegal drug use - the problem was though it had left me with terrible OCD ( intrusive thoughts) which made it very hard to socialise normally. So as with many recovering substance abusers I had the usual need for relaxation that nearly everyone beefs when they're socialising hence the popularity if alcohol but with the damage it had done to my nervous system on top of that. Hence my trip to my GP to see if there was anything he could do to help with the residual OCD, anxiety and looking back mild depression. Oh big mistake as I was prescribed my first SSRI Sertaline which in a mild way did help until its efficacy stopped after a year or so from that I changed to citalopram then escitalopram and mirtazipine the latter actually making me feel worse. Finally I was put on fluoxetine which I had always hoped to be put on having read all the glowing reports of it revolutionising peoples' lives. So I remained on this for around 4 years (40mg) till it hit me that I didn't want to remain on any psychotropic drug for the rest of my life, the realisation that it undoubtedly damaged the taker physically and the clincher that I was tired of having unpleasant dreams every night since I had gone on it which themselves didn't exactly set me up cheerfully for the coming day . Anyway back in September this year I spoke to my GP and stated I wanted to come off it he advised a quick taper a month at 20mg and then stop. I'm even sketchy on the exact dates etc as I didn't think for a moment I'd end up in the living nightmare whrte I now find myself marooned. Anyway things seemed to be progressing well for the first around 4-6 weeks after I took my last pill. Then around 12 days ago I started to feel.physically under the weather which within a day had developed into what I thought was the norovirus stomach bug which meant I had to leave work soon after arriving thar day. Anyway what I thought was the virus gradually developed a mental component which then became all consuming. I'm not even sure now if the gastric problems were not just early physical symptoms of the withdrawal. Living by myself and being too weak to go out the psychological symptoms could start to rage unabated. The most severe depression I'd ever experienced- a feeling if utter hopelessness and devestation - anxiety so intense I could sort of feeling it tangibly in my veins, weird (a bit like a pulse of blood in my head rather than 'zaps'), random pains in my legs, terrible guilt for how I felt I had treated my parents (my wonderful mother and late father did not feel I treated them badly I know but all my years mired in the substance abuse I condemn myself for doing thatvwhen I could have made them far prouder of me). On top of all these symptoms my mother is now 89 and starting to become unwell and living 280 miles away I am trying to help get the care she needs .Finally I work as a locum worker so only get paid when I'm in work so can have no time off to deal with this or I will lose everythihg) I have just had a planned week off but this has obviously been taken by the extreme mental distress I'm experiencing with the PAWS so I'm filled with utter dread at the thought of returning to work tomorrow to a job as a medical professional where I have to interact and assist other people all day. Currently I'm just surviving thus excruciating mental torment from hour to hour Since I returned from my mother's 2 days ago I have made myself start an hours work on my exercise bike immediately on rising- I started yesterday and am about to resume in a few minutes. Also intend to force myself to go out with a local walking group at the weekend akthough that in itself may be terrifying if I suddenly have a panic attack in the middle if the countryside with people I don't know. Aside from the above described symptoms the most trivial things are irritating me especially certain sounds and can themself send me hurtling further into the abyss - yes I know that sounds ridiculous but they seem to trigger off intrusive thoughts which I then ruminate on. I have not had any form of alcoholic drink for 4 years next month - there was a long period when I had stopped the binging but believed I could drink sensibly which I now realise was a false belief in my case becsuse about 10 times in 20 years I fell off the wagon quite spectacularly and at my age that was 10 years roo much. The reason I mention this is that I went as far as buying 2 bottles of beer last night to try to give myself sone relief from this torture but I'm happy to say I left them in my car. They will be disposed of down the sink later! I feeling utterly bereft abd hopeless typing this and reading up on the possible months and years of distress ahead I must admit fleeting suicidal ideation has crossed my mind. But I would never do this to my mum and anyway it is counter to my Christian belief but I admit such strange thoughts as almost wanting to be taken seriously physically ill so I get some kind of care have appeared. I have no real family aside from my mother and because I moved 200 away from my hometown 25 years ago only a couple of friends up here abd even they live 40 miles away so it does feel a very lonely fight. I hope I haven't outstay my welcome with this introduction but felt all was necessary to explain the full situation I'm in and how I got here. I also hope that with 'only' around 2 weeks of PAWS under my belt that you do not think it too early to be typing on here. However the symptoms are clearly withdrawal syndrome and I have never felt a fraction of this torment I an in in a life that overall has not been easy. So thanks for providing this service and at least it shows I am far from alone in this awful experience. Finally restarting an AD is just not an option the only meds I would consider is prn benzos if so directed which a British doctor will thankfully never give you more than about 5 x 2.5mg a month maximum. But really I hope that this is it for me with any meds which cross the blood brain barrier for life. And aside from natural remedies I can finally clean my brain of all the pollutants which we can agree is what they all really are.
  2. I've been on 20mg Paroxetine for over a decade. Regular cannabis user. Trying to taper off since 2019. Many mistakes along the way. My 2019 journey was too fast. I decreased 5mg steps every month, by splitting a 20mg tablet. I made it relatively stable into 5mg (although fighting some symptoms) and then quit. Symptoms were too overwhealming so I desperately and naively reinstated into 18mg. Then I started a slower taper on liquid. Went up and down a few times and parked at 16mg for over 6 months, seeking stabilization. Coudln't stay away from cannabis in that meanwhile. Then I had to relocate to Brazil (I'm Brazilian) because of the pandemic. Here there's no Liquid Paroxetine available on the market, so I was forced to adapt my strategy. Started compounding Paroxetine and went for the Fluoxetine Bridge in January. Longer half-life, etc. Got as low as 4mg Paroxetine plus 12mg Fluoxetine. Cannabis on and off. Until last month (June). I had to take a dose of antibiotics (Azithromycin). Had an instant reaction with Thunderclap migraines. So I started going up with the dosages, which helps only temporarily. After a few days, the migraines come back, along with insomnia. Not touching Cannabis. Now I'm at 6mg Paroxetine + 20mg Fluoxetine and I fear I'm spiraling out of control, since reinstating doesn't seem to solve the issue. Upping Fluoxetine doesn't seem to make much difference. Also trying some Magnesium supplements, no success. Maybe I should kick it up in larger steps? Go up to 10mg Paroxetine? I have 2 very hard problems to solve: What's the best short term strategy? How do I get rid of migraines, get some sleep and stabilize? What's the best long term strategy? Did I mess up my Fluoxetine bridge? I fear that my Fluoxetine bridge was too slow and now I'm stuck with 2 SSRIs instead of one. Plus the long-term synergistic effects of both are even less known, which makes things even scarier. Any help is appreciated 🙏
  3. Hi Guys. I have been on every SSRI over the past 2 years, apart from Paroxetine. This all started from some situational anxiety at work. Each time i took a medication i was on them for about 3 month without any benefit at all. I would loose time at work, cold turkey and return back to work. Each time i did this i was getting worse and worse. I would then return back to the doctor and ve started on something else. This has basically gone on for 2 years. All this time i have got worse. I have now come to understand withdrawal and the fact i could have well been prescribed numerous medications due to an illness been mistaken for withdrawal. 8 weeks ago after stopping my second attempt of Escitalopram for 3 months i decided to stop for good with a fast taper. I feel anxious, dizzy, fatigued, poor cognition and inability to focus. I know if i take a dose of SSRI that this will improve however i will return to the Zombie state of meds. I am finished with medication!!! On reflection my problems i encountered prior to any medication was far easier than the problems i have had the past 2 years on medications. I think i have been a victim of Psychiatry! I dont think i ever needed medication! My chemical imbalance was created by meds! If i had no knowledge of this i would be stuck in Psychiatry! I just want to know ppls experiences and can i still be in withdrawal at 8 weeks after 2 years of messing about with meds. Thanks Lee
  4. Hi comunity, thanks to all for let me participate here and administrar. My journey, one panick attack and then insomnia, severe anxiety 14 months ago. so Dr started Zoloft, and a hard time for 3-4 months, literally ALL side effects and level out on month 5-6. I finished my year on Zoloft and Dr tappered off on 3 months. I was very weel but now 8 weeks after of off Zoloft, waves of anxiety, fear, hopeleness, headaches, muscules pain, insomnia, very hard time for me and my Dr Started Prozac 10 mgs this week. I need support , orientation, some experiences??? Is my first time with antideppressents. I Dont know the way
  5. 2008 Lexapro (no idea mg) I was 17 years old 2009 Sertraline (no idea mg) 2011 Pristique (no idea mg) 2011 Viibryd (no idea mg) 2011 – 2021 Fluoxetine (over the years 10mg - 40mg) 12/2/2020 Woke up with tingling and muscle weakness in extremities. (Never went away.) 2/16/2021 Woke up with sharp, traveling pain in my head, dizziness, vertigo, lightheaded, shaking hands and legs/weakness, nausea, muscle spasms, fatigue, sensitivity to light and sound, out of breath doing anything at all, ringing in my ears, obstructions in vision, white and black dots flashing in vision, want to lie down all the time, hot and cold sensations in arms and legs. (Never went away.) (Saw these specialists and had all of these tests within 2 years after symptoms began) Had two MRIs and CT scan – everything was normal Saw Rheumatologist – tested negative for any autoimmune diseases Blood work was normal Saw Ophthamologist about vision issues – everything was normal Met with Nuerologist and had EEG and EMG nerve testing – everything was normal Saw ENT and had VNG exam– everything normal. 6/2021 Saw holistic doctor and was told I may be having an allergic reaction of sorts to the Fluoxetine. I was at 40mg and I began tapering off with help from my GP. 6/26/2021 began 30mg 7/8/2021 began 20mg 7/19/2021 began 10mg 7/26/2021 completely off meds for the first time in 13 years. Within months, anxiety and depression got progressively worse, unbearable empathy, suicidal thoughts, intrusive and bone chilling fear, thinking I was dead, impending doom, hopelessness, while also experiencing the above physical symptoms. I had days where I could get out of bed, drive and even go jogging or to the gym. Other days I could barely dress myself due to the fatigue and weakness. My physical symptoms improved a lot over the first year of symptoms. Looking back, I was living a very normal life, physically speaking, but my emotional symptoms became increasingly unendurable. Thanatophobia and also the above emotional symptoms led me to take Buspirone (Buspar), prescribed by my GP. I began having brain zaps, extreme brain fog, difficulty completing sentences, memory issues, inability to stop crying, panic attacks, etc. I felt like my life was a simulation and that nothing was real. It was a low dosage and I discontinued cold turkey, advised by my GP. Since I was still experiencing a mild form of the physical symptoms, I believed that Fluoxetine wasn't the culprit, and I needed immediate relief from what was happening in my head, so my GP prescribed 20mg again. I can say now that this was the worst decision of my whole life. 3/13/2022 I took Fluoxetine 20mg for 3 days. After the 3rd capsule, I was barely conscious, my vision was black and I couldn't stand up, my legs shook so badly that I could barely walk from the bed to the bathroom. Dizziness and vertigo were unbearable...sometimes objects would move, other times the room moved, other times I was moving when I wasn't. I felt like my head wasn't connected to my body. My coordination was off and fine motor skills were difficult, like holding a fork or texting. My eyes couldn't follow and I felt like they were jerking side to side. Unbearable pressure at base of neck and forehead. Felt like my brain was hot. My boyfriend brought food to my bed for about a month. I believe that if I had continued taking 1 or 2 more capsules, I would be a vegetable. Since then I've seen 3 psychiatrists, asking if they have any experience with this sort of thing. All 3 had no answers and tried to push other medications on me. I took the GeneSight test and both Buspar and Fluoxetine showed as a “good match” for me. I've developed sensitivities to several medications, which exacerbate the symptoms that I feel and put me in bed for days, making me afraid to take anything other than Tylenol. I definitely turned to alcohol on a daily basis because the effects of drinking make me feel like I'm not crazy. When I drink, it's comforting to me to know that I have a reason to feel dizzy and foggy. I learned that tequila gives me enough energy to do basic daily physical things, like clean the house and take my dog to the park. On a good day, if I drink A LOT, I can even go out dancing. This in itself makes me feel like my symptoms are all in my head and make me feel like I've lost my mind. Not drinking every day to give me relief from my symptoms has been difficult. Other than the holistic doctor's suspicions, doctors have left me completely on my own. No one could help me or had any answers. It feels like death will be the only solution. Over the months, I gradually improved enough to drive short distances and take short walks. It has been 1 year since I took the 3 capsules and I have improved physically about 30% and emotionally 10%, on good days When the waves happen, I am in bed all day. The brain fog, dizziness and fatigue are what bother me the most and the brain zaps still wake me up occasionally. Sometimes I jolt awake thinking I am dead. I still feel as though my life is not real. I am seeing a talk therapist, doing intensive Nuerofeedback therapy, eating an anti-inflammatory and high omega 3 diet, cutting back on alcohol and caffeine, taking vitamins, exercising as much as I physically can, and clinging to hope. I owe my life to my boyfriend who has encouraged and cared for me over these 2 horrific years. Finding this forum has encouraged me so much. My story is different because why did these “withdrawal” symptoms begin while I was still on Fluoxetine? And why did taking it again make everything 100 times worse? Has anyone else experienced this?
  6. ADMIN NOTE: Read this entire topic before attempting a switch to fluoxetine. Be sure to read details and cautions below . Consult a knowledgeable medical practitioner before changing medications. Also see Tips for tapering off fluoxetine (Prozac) Switching or bridging with another related drug, usually of a longer half-life, is a medically recognized way to get off psychiatric drugs, particularly if you find tapering your original drug to be intolerable. Many people with failed tapers from venlafaxine (Effexor), desvenlafaxine (Pristiq), paroxetine (Paxil), and duloxetine (Cymbalta) find they need to bridge in order to go off the drug. For many doctors, a switch to Prozac to go off a different antidepressant is routine. Because of the risks of switching drugs -- see below -- we recommend attempting a very gradual direct taper from your drug, with bridging with a different drug only a last resort. There are a lot of unknowns in bridging. You will need to consider whether taking the risks of substituting another drug are worth possibly alleviating your current withdrawal syndrome. Fluoxetine (Prozac) has the longest half-life of any of the modern antidepressants. Because it takes more than a week for a dose to be metabolized completely, a careful taper off fluoxetine is easier for many people -- see information about Tapering off Prozac. And, at least fluoxetine comes in a liquid. (Do not assume fluoxetine is "self-tapering"! We have many people here with Prozac withdrawal syndrome. While going off fluoxetine usually has less risk, one might still develop withdrawal symptoms going off fluoxetine. No bridging strategy is risk-free.) Citalopram (Celexa )and its sibling escilatopram (Lexapro) have half-lives of about 35 hours, a relatively long half-life among SSRIs, and are other candidates for a bridging strategy. They also come in a liquid form. Citalopram has a half-life longer than other SSRIs but shorter than fluoxetine, so you may wish to bridge with citalopram instead, since if it causes adverse effects of its own, they will not last as long as they would with fluoxetine. There's very little documentation about the success rate for the Prozac switch. It may be best to reserve it as a last resort, if you cannot taper an antidepressant by any other means. To switch to Prozac for tapering, consult a doctor knowledgeable about this technique. You must find a knowledgeable doctor to help you to with a bridging strategy. The cross-taper method discussed below is probably the safest way to make a change in drugs. You might wish to print this post out to discuss it with your doctor. For most people the switch goes smoothly but for some it doesn't. The drawbacks of switching to another drug to get off the first drug, described below, apply to ALL bridging strategies for ALL drugs, including benzodiazepines (where people often want to bridge with diazepam per the Ashton method). Risks of bridging A bridging strategy has the following drawbacks: Dropping the first antidepressant in the switch may cause withdrawal symptoms even though you're taking a bridge drug. Adverse reaction to the bridge drug, such as Prozac. Serotonin toxicity or adverse effects of a drug combination. If withdrawal symptoms are already underway, switching to a bridge drug may not help. A cross-taper requires a number of careful steps. Difficulty tapering off the bridge drug. All of the bridge drugs can be difficult to taper themselves. So, like anything else, a drug switch is not guaranteed to work. When to switch or bridge "The devil you know is better than the devil you don't know". A direct taper from the drug to which your nervous system is accustomed carries less risk than a switch to a new drug. You may have a bad reaction to the substitute drug, or the substitution may not work to forestall withdrawal symptoms. The risk of a switch is justified if you find a taper from the original drug is simply too difficult. Usually people will do a switch when they find reducing the original antidepressant by even a small amount -- 10% or even 5% -- causes intolerable withdrawal symptoms. (I have heard doctors say they don't even try tapering off paroxetine (Paxil) or venlafaxine (Effexor ), they switch to Prozac at the beginning of the tapering process.) If you are having intolerable withdrawal or adverse effects from an antidepressant, it may be worth risking the worst case, which is that a switch to a bridge drug doesn't help and you have withdrawal syndrome anyway. If you're thinking of switching simply as a matter of convenience, you need to weigh the risks against the amount of convenience you would gain. Generally, switching for convenience is a bad idea. CAUTION: A switch to a bridge drug is not guaranteed to work. It's safer to slow down a taper than count on a switch. A switch really should be used only when a taper becomes unbearable or there are other serious adverse effects from the medication. You must work with a doctor who is familiar with bridging, in case you develop severe symptoms. Overview of cross-tapering method For drug switches, many doctors prefer cross-tapering, where a low dose of one drug is added and gradually increased while the first drug is reduced. For a period, both drugs are taken at the same time. Here is a graphic representation of cross-tapering: If you are making a switch to Prozac, the second antidepressant is fluoxetine (Prozac). Given fluoxetine's long half-life, it will take a couple of weeks to reach full effect ("steady-state"). You will not be able to tell if your fluoxetine dose is enough in a day or a few days. The effect of your initial dose of fluoxetine will build throughout the process of cross-tapering. It's best to avoid increasing fluoxetine throughout the cross-taper, you could end up with an adverse reaction or even serotonin toxicity from too much fluoxetine (see below). (Unlike fluoxetine, you will be able to assess the effect of citalopram as a bridge within 5 days. Due to its shorter half-life, it takes a shorter time to reach a steady state level in your bloodstream.) Also see this discussion about cross-tapering with Prozac: Serotonin toxicity and serotonin syndrome You run the risk of serotonin toxicity if you are taking too much serotonergic. Most antidepressants (and some other drugs, such as triptans and MDMA) are serotonergics. Serotonergic effects of antidepressants are added when you take more than one of them, particularly if you add an SSRI (such as Prozac, Celexa, or Lexapro) to an SNRI (such as desvenlafaxine (Pristiq), duloxetine (Cymbalta), venlafaxine (Effexor), venlafaxine XR (Effexor XR), milnacipran (Savella), and levomilnacipran (Fetzima)). (Other types of antidepressants should not be combined with tricyclics or MAOIs.) Symptoms of too much serotonergic can be: Nervousness, anxiety, akathisia, sleeplessness, fast heartbeat. Symptoms of serotonin toxicity can be these plus disorientation, sweating, and others. Serotonin syndrome is even more serious. See Serotonin Syndrome or Serotonin Toxicity Reduction of the drug dose should resolve serotonin toxicity. Note that if you cross-taper, you will be taking 2 drugs at once for part of the time. Because of the potential of serotonin toxicity by overdosing SSRIs as well as in combination with SNRIs, it's safest to err on the lower side of a Prozac dose "equivalent" -- such as 5mg -- to your original drug. This is why doctors familiar with the Prozac switch will cross-taper by adding an initial LOW DOSE of Prozac to another antidepressant. Start low, the effect of fluoxetine will increase over at least a couple of weeks. Another concern: Escilatopram (Lexapro) is several times stronger, milligram for milligram, than the other SSRIs. If you add 10mg escilatopram to the high dose of 60mg duloxetine (Cymbalta), for example, you run the risk of serotonergic toxicity -- 10mg escilatopram is equal to approximately 20mg-30mg duloxetine. How much fluoxetine (Prozac) to substitute for my drug? Since fluoxetine's half-life is so much longer than those of other antdepressants, its effect is a little different. It's not a stronger antidepressant, but the effect of each dose lasts much longer. This may be the reason a lower dose of fluoxetine often seems to adequately substitute for other antidepressants. For an idea of equivalent doses of your medication to fluoxetine (Prozac) read this post (January 7, 2018) in this topic. It compares fluoxetine 40mg/day (a fairly high dose of Prozac) to other antidepressants. Source of that data: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/25911132 If you have tapered to a lower dose of an antidepressant, an even lower dose of Prozac may be more tolerable. If you have decreased your antidepressant dose by a half or more, you may wish to try 5mg Prozac. If you have substituted fluoxetine for your drug and after two weeks, you feel you have withdrawal symptoms, you may wish to gradually the fluoxetine dosage. After each change in fluoxetine, wait at least 2 weeks to see the effect before deciding on another increase. More is not better for nervous systems sensitized by withdrawal. EXAMPLES OF THE PROZAC SWITCH Below is information I've gathered from doctors about how to do the Prozac switch. You will see there is no standard protocol. Healy 2009 method for the Prozac switch From Healy 2009 Halting SSRIs withdrawal guidelines: Phelps-Kelly 2010 method for Prozac switch From Clinicians share information about slow tapering (2010) Jim Phelps, one of the authors of the above, posted in 2005 in some detail about the so-called "Prozac bridging" strategy. He said it is described in Joseph Glenmullen's book, Prozac Backlash, maybe in the chapter titled of "Held Hostage." The technique Dr. Phelps described in this post skips doses and finishes with alternating dosages, which we do not recommend for people who are sensitive to withdrawal symptoms. Given that fluoxetine liquid is available, this is completely unnecessary. Foster 2012 method for Prozac switch Dr. Mark Foster, a GP whose mission is to get people safely off psychiatric drugs includes this in a presentation he gives to doctors. http://www.gobhi.org/spring_conference_powerpoints/safewithdrawal_of_psychotropics%5Bautosaved%5D.ppt. His method involves overlapping Prozac with the other antidepressant -- cross-tapering. Prey 2012 method for Prozac switch Another knowledgeable doctor (whom I trust) explained his technique to me (this is the technique I personally would prefer if I had to do it, it seems much gentler) For a "normal" dose of Effexor (150mg per day or more) or Paxil (20mg) or Cymbalta (20mg), he would switch to 10mg Prozac with a week of overlap. In other words, take both medications for a week and then drop the Effexor. Lower doses of Effexor or other antidepressant require lower doses of Prozac as a "bridge." The lower dose of Prozac reduces the risk of excessive serotonergic stimulation (serotonin toxicity) from the combination of the two antidepressants during the overlap period. Do not stay on the combination of the first antidepressant and Prozac for more than 2 weeks, or you run the risk of your nervous system accommodating to the combination and having difficulty tapering off both antidepressants. Later, taper off Prozac. He acknowledged Prozac can have its withdrawal problems, but given Prozac's long half-life, gradual tapering should be easier than tapering off Effexor. Smoothing out a transition to fluoxetine Even with a cross-taper, your system might feel a jolt after you finally drop the initial antidepressant, particularly if it is an SNRI, such as Effexor, Pristiq, or Cymbalta, or other drug that is not an SSRI like fluoxetine. (Other SSRIs include Paxil, Zoloft, Luvox, Celexa, Lexapro). If you go through a rough patch after the transition, patients find they can take a tiny chip of the original drug (or a bead or two, if it's a capsule containing beads) for a week or two to smooth out the transition. Eventually, you'd take a chip as needed only when you feel a wave of withdrawal from the original drug, and then finally leave the original drug entirely behind. (A gelatin capsule might make a tablet fragment easier to get down, but it is not necessary if you can wash it down with a good swallow of water. The gelatin capsule quickly dissolves in your stomach.) Here's an example. There is no shame in doing this. Whatever works, works.
  7. Hello, SA! I have been lurking for a few days and am determined to stop “needing” SSRIs, or at least feeling like I need them. I’ve undergone a few years of CBT for major depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, and OCD. All in all, I’ve made a lifetime of progress in about 10 years due to a great therapist (after a few not so great ones), a great psychiatrist (after a few not so great ones), and a wonderful support network. I am extremely grateful for all these things and it’s part of what makes me feel so ready for taking this last step. I have the tools in my bag; I just need to use them. Long story short, it started with Lexapro + Ativan as needed around 2014, but Lexapro didn’t work well, so I switched to Zoloft for a few years. That helped, and eventually I stopped taking Ativan as well… and then I found a wonderful therapist, who taught me so much about how to react to things with more and more control. I experienced a few rather difficult intimate relationships (gaslighting, narcissism, etc.) which didn’t help but I got through it. In 2018, I found myself in a new city with a new job and eventually a new and supportive partner. At the end of 2018, I switched to 10 mg Prozac. In 2020, I stopped taking Prozac over what I realize now was too fast of a taper, and found the anxiety thereafter very difficult. I was sold on the idea that it’s ok to stick with a low dose but honestly, I’m done with it and ready to let my CNS do its thing. Personally, financially, career-wise, and relationship-wise, my life is stable. I am very active, but not planning anything major, not planning on having children (at all), just focusing on the here and now, so now is as good a time as any. I am worried that perimenopause (will be 34 this year and already experiencing some symptoms) in the coming years will make things difficult, but I’m tired of random dizziness, night sweats, having to take a pill every morning, and anxiety despite having an anti-anxiety medication. My biggest worry is the dosage. I have been reading a ton about safe tapers and I am ready and raring to go… but how do you taper off a 10mg capsule? And what do you do if your psychiatrist won’t prescribe it or your insurance won’t cover it? I can’t say that is happening as I haven’t even started the journey (again) yet, but want to be prepared. My second biggest worry is remembering to ground and use my CBT tools. I often get anxious when I’m in a safe place (or out in public but with trusted people), but that’s a behavioral thing that I believe I can deal with. As of 2021, I take 25 mg Hydroxyzine as needed for sleep (and allergy attacks as I was told it’s basically an antihistamine but if this is untrue or unsafe please let me know), but am comfortable stopping that too. Open to any and all advice and thankful for this page and this community.
  8. i swore i would never take an snri again after what i went through on effexor, but he suggested i try cymbalta for the chronic pain and told me that generally there are less side effects/zaps than with effexor, so i said i would give it a try. my psychologist and his super decided that i have bipolar 2 not mdd, but the pdoc waved this away and didn’t even consider mood stabilizers. when my pdoc raised my dose of cymbalta after i expressed a wish to discontinue, and wrote in my record that i display “abnormal illness behaviors” (which just means i disagree with him?), i have decided to get off the ADs once and for all.
  9. About 2-3 weeks ago I tried to go from 10mg of fluoxetine to 5mg. I am taking capsules so I went from taking 1 10mg capsule daily to 1 10mg capsule every other day. I also foolishly tried to taper off of caffeine at the same time. About a week ago I started experiencing disturbances to my sleep. It started by waking up in the middle of the night feeling awful and taking too long to get back to sleep. Last night was the worst so far. My brain felt incredibly wired and wouldn't turn off. I wasn't able to get to sleep until about 4 am when usually I get to bed by about 11 pm. Originally I thought it was because I went off caffeine too quickly, but I have reinstated caffeine a few days ago and it didn't help anything. I'm thinking it's probably because I went down too fast on the prozac. Which is frustrating because I went from 20mg to 10mg pretty easily. I understand that I shouldn't have tried to go down on caffeine and prozac at the same time. I have reinstated 10mg daily prozac. I am planning on letting my sleep stabilize and then move on to tapering the caffeine before I tackle the prozac. At this point I am unable to tell a good dose to start with on the caffeine and I probably won't know until the prozac stabilizes again. So I'm going to stay within the 50-100mg range. I think it's also important to say that I became sick a few days ago. Sickness really messes with my head, so it just added to the confusion. My whole goal in the next week or two is to find a baseline again and go from there.
  10. Help777

    Help777: journal

    Effexor x12 years. Added lithium in sept 2015. Added prozac in october to help bridge taper from effexor as i started having symptoms. Started withdrawing effexor in September 2014. Over last 4 months i went From 112.5 to 14mg as of last week.. Last week I seemed to all of a sudden hit a wall. Crying uncontrollably constantly. Shaking, nausea, extreme fear and overwhelming need to cry. Ive read your site. Ive reinstated to 20 mg of effexor for last 3 days but absolutely no improvement. Im so scared. I cant go to work like this. Continuing prozac 20 and lithium 300. Please help.
  11. Hi there! Im here because I am starting my tapering journey from sertraline 100mg to 50mg. Been on 100mg sertraline for about a year combined with 150mg bupropion. Im feeling emotionally stable, by I've got slight sexual dysfunction and problems losing weight. Therefore tapering to 50mg sertraline. If all goes well and Im steady with my new job (which I start januari 2nd) I will start tapering towards zero sertraline. I am using a tapering schedule provided by drugtaper.com using tablets and liquid. My goal is to be at 50 mg at the end of februari 2023. Tapering calculator for antidepressants.pdf
  12. Hi all, I am thrilled I found this site. After two unsuccessful withdrawals in the past, I am hoping this time around I am more successful with a slow and steady taper. I am currently on 20 mg Prozac and have been since 2021. I wanted some advice around creating a liquid solution. My doctor refuses to prescribe the liquid form of Prozac to me (which I realize would make this more convenient) and doesn’t agree with my 10% slow tapering schedule that I discussed with her. She’d like me to drop in 5 mg increments every month which I’ve tried explaining seems too fast for me. It seems that I have to take matters into my own hands and create liquid solutions for my dosages. Per advice from some other forums on here, I purchased syringes and measurement cups. My plan is to dissolve my 20 mg tablets in 20 ml water, shake the solution, and draw out whatever is not needed since it will be a 1 mg : 1 mL solution. I was hoping for some advice/suggestions from you all around this plan. Will this be accurate/ effective? Thank you I am so relieved to have this community for support.
  13. Hi all. I really need some advice about reinstating. I was on Prozac for about 5 years (started at 20mg and was at 60mg for the last 1.5 years) for seasonal affective disorder and anxiety. A couple years ago, I started Adderall for suspected narcolepsy. My narcolepsy got much worse the following year and another stimulant, armodafinil, was added. I finally got approved for a treatment that treats the root problem by normalizing the sleep cycle and started Xywav in September 2021. A few weeks in, I woke up feeling rested for the first time in my life, but with some very unusual symptoms atypical for Xywav. Going down on the Xywav did not get rid of it. I did stop armodafinil which helped a bit. I was referred to a psychiatrist (scheduled 3 months out) and neurologist (scheduled 7 months out). I went 3 months with these symptoms (SEVERE anxiety, dizziness, tremor, muscle twitching and stiffness, feeling agitated by noise and light, and sensory overloads) and was finally diagnosed with serotonin toxicity from the psychiatrist. I did a rapid taper from 60mg to 20mg over 3 months. Each drop I made, I had withdrawal, then stabilized quickly and had the toxicity come back. My psychiatrist and I decided to try holding at 20mg because of a longer withdrawal period, but then I started to feel like the toxicity was coming back. I kept going and taking the pill because I didn't see how it could be toxicity at that point, but I kept getting worse each time I took it. I started having spasms and burning sensations on my skin and was very hyper-reflexive. I was eventually instructed to CT at 20mg. I immediately felt better the next day, pain and spasms were gone within 3 days and I improved dramatically over the next couple months with only mild withdrawal symptoms. I did treat the mild withdrawal by taking 0.25-0.5mg microdoses of Prozac as needed (which I realize now was probably a bad idea, but it worked at the time). At 4 weeks, I started to have mild tingling in my legs but didn't think much of it. At 6-7 weeks out I felt almost completely recovered and back to normal and then week 8 everything started going downhill with the burning and tingling sensations in my legs amping up. I tried my last microdose of 1mg on June 6 and didn't have much change in symptoms. Over the next several weeks, I developed burning and tingling in my arms, back/spine, chest, neck, face, and now stomach. Along with this, I also have had severe muscle spasms in various areas, stiffness/tightness, cramping, and general muscle/joint pain. Posting this, I have now been off for 4 months and am going through wave and window episodes of severe pain and less pain. Each wave I seem to have burning/tingling neuropathic type pain, muscle pain, spasm, or stiffness developing in a new area of my body, so it’s now widespread. The pain is milder during the day, but gets so much worse at night and is causing lots of fear and anxiety. Since starting 5-htp, curcumin, and modified cictrus pectin (recommend by a naturopath) I seem to be having a few more windows through the day of a lot less pain and even 1-2 nights a week where the pain does not become severe at night. My mental symptoms are anxiety/fear, detachment (happens 6-8pm everyday) and some mood swings/low mood. The intense fear caused by the pain is the worst one. Most of my other symptoms are physical (blurred vision, dizziness, nausea, fatigue, loss of appetite). I know reinstating can be a bit risky this far out, but I am a grad student and the semester will be starting soon. I would like to be more functional than I am... and in less pain. So is it worth trying a reinstatement at this point to see if the pain will go away or should I just try to wait this out? If I do choose to reinstate, my psychiatrist suggested reinstating 5mg, but would it be better to start at 1-2mg and work up? 4 months off at end of July and primary symptoms are pain (burning/tingling neuropathic pain, spasms, stiffness, aches bodywide), blurred vision, dizziness, detachment, nausea, loss of appetite, dry mouth and eyes, mood swings, and a lot of anxiety and fear. A couple other things. One thing I have working for me in withdrawal is my Xywav. I always get 8 hours of quality sleep a night with no insomnia, so maybe that will help me to stabilize just a bit faster than normal (or maybe its wistful thinking...). I also don't think I have a chemical sensitivity. I have started supplements, an antiviral (acyclovir), and lowered the adderall without any obvious worsening of symptoms. Also is there anybody here who can relate to this and has developed a lot of pain in withdrawal? I’m 24 and never had pain before. I have had a full autoimmune and blood work up as well as a brain mri. All normal, so hopefully it's just withdrawal. Sorry for the long post, but thank you for reading and any advice you can offer.
  14. Hi there, I'm a new one here. Luckily, I've found this website because we don't have any single website which helps people who want to stop taking antidepressants in my country. My name is Anastasia, I'm 32. I work as a teacher at school. I'm married and have a lovely cat. I take antidepressants for 11 years. I've always been a shy person with lack of confidence. Since my childhood I've suffered from intrusive thoughts just about any imaginable staff. The first time I went to the psychiatrist was because of intrusive thoughts about my relationship. And my horror story began. I had various reasons for my constant painful thoughts. I had permament nausea, irritable bowel, which didn't let me leave my house, a sense of guilt, depressive thoughts, anxiety. constant tears and just liying at home and staring at one point - not all at once, of course. These were the reasons for many many visits to the doctor. Each time antidepressants helped a lot and I was back to life again. Can't say I was always in a good mood, but, nevertheless, I could live. I really don't remember the years and dosage of medicines, but in different periods I took amitriptilin, venlafaxine, zoloft, duloxetine, fluoxetine, phenazipame, atarax. One day pills stopped helping me. I changed three doctors hoping someone'll help me. The first one finally said that my brain had become tolerant to drugs and I had to quit. I tried so many times and always my thoughts came back and tortured me. The second doc said I had endogenous depression and it's ok to take antidepresants just for the whole life. She also said that if one medicine didn't help, so let's try another. And we tried and changed. My thoughts and depression didn't go away, but I felt not well, not bad. The third doc finally said that my diagnose was anxiery disorder and eating disorder. Insisted on treating my depression to the end and then quit. My latest medicine was venlafaxine 75 mg. But I decided to come to my first doctor and tried to withdraw like 37, 5 - one week, 18,75 - two weeks. Now it's three weeks I'm off. And it's just a hell. My thoughts (now about my weight and shape) have become more painful than they were on medicines. I find it hard to go outside because I feel really uncomfortable in all my clothes. It seems they are too tight. I'm depressed, angry and nervous. I can't do anything and distract myself. Even in my pyjamas I feel fat and uncomfortable. The story of my eating disorder: when I got married, my husband and I gained some weight. Then we started keeping to a diet. We lost weight and I felt just great for some time. Then it wasn't enough and I started to eat 1000 calories a day. But still I had a fat belly and wasn't satisfied with my weight and the way I looked. I gave up dieting and gained half the weight I had lost previously. Now I'm obsessed with my weight and it's just a nightmare. I think about it 24/7 but can't stop eating. Food is the only thing that gives me pleasure. I tried Gestalt therapy and CBT a bit, but I'm convinced that these sessions just do nothing. I understand everything, nod to the psychologist but don't believe it can help. I'm really confused now if I have to be on medicines or not and don't know what to do... Living like this is not a real life. The only wish I have now is to stop this suffering, by means of drugs or not, I don't know. I 'm studying this website and try to understand all the mechanisms. I'm not sure I'll manage to tolerate this for many years, it's been only three weeks but I'm completely exhausted. The reason why I wanted to quit was to have a baby, but it's practically impossible to think about pregnancy and birth now because of my condition. Seeking for help and support. Thank you in advance. PS: I was really frightened to start my topic here because of the country where I live, because of my nationality. But I want you to know that I just can't stand all the hell that is going on right now in the world. Of course, it adds a lot to my anxiety and depression.
  15. I am about 2 years since taking fluoxetine. I still have quite a few symptoms persisting. I tried taking benedryl the other night. My tinnitus went through the roof and I feel like I am back in the first year of withdrawals were I never get sleep ques. Has anyone else had these symptoms when taking benedryl in withdrawals?
  16. Hi Everyone! Found this site when looking for research on tapering off my medications, the history should show in my signature if I've updated it correctly (hopefully). I was put on Mirtazapine around 10ish years ago after suffering unacceptable side effects of Fluoxetine. It's served me well keeping my relatively stable through the years at varying doses. In 2020, I burnt out in work and ended up being put on Wellbutrin alongside the Mirtazapine. I tried to come off the Mirtazapine a few years back, circa 2018 (from 15mg), I had initially split the tablets to 7.5mg for I believe a month or so, I don't recall any overly negative effects. Slightly more erratic mood but nothing that was unmanageable. I then started skipping doses to reduce the average (big no no! I didn't realise at the time how bad that was), I did speak to the doctor as my mood was becoming unmanageable and the doctor then moved me to compounded medication (the soluble versions aren't available where I live). Even moving to the compounded meds I had weeks where I was okay but still teeter tottering, I believe I had gotten down to 5mg per day but I think I dropped from 7.5mg - 5mg. My mood always seemed worse when I was 3/4 the way through the monthly bottle, from reading on these forums it sounds like it was losing its potency. After a rather horrible work trip where I was away from home and my support network the anxiety and weepiness were out of hand, I panicked and thought I was relapsing so called my Dr and ended up back on the Mirtazapine at 15mg. When I started the Wellbutrin 150mg XR I was on 30mg of Mirtazapine but early 2021 (Jan/Feb) we upped the Wellbutrin to 300mg and dropped the Mirtazapine to 15mg (May) as I was tired all the time. I'm aiming to taper off both medications but I'm not sure which to start with, I was planning on the Mirtazapine due to the length of time I've been on it as I figure will need to be slow. But not sure if the Wellbutrin alone will cause crazy anxiety as I've noticed I've had more general anxiety recently. I've ordered some Ora-plus so I can compound it at home on a weekly/bi-weekly basis. Not sure whether I should start the 10% decrease from 15mg or if I should try to drop to 7.5mg and taper from there. Based on my calculations decreasing by 10% per month I'm looking at 1.5-2years, this seems like an extremely long time. Thoughts? What dose have people jumped from on the Mirtazapine? I ideally want to be completely med free in about 2 years as my partner and I want to start a family but I don't want to be on meds or have to transition to Fluoxetine as I really hated it. I could absolutely keep writing and talking away to myself but i'll leave it there for now. Great to virtually meet you all!
  17. Hello everyone! I am a new user here. I've lurked around this site before but have yet to introduce myself. I was a Prozac user for a year from August 2015 - September 2016. I had taken it for social and general anxiety. I was on 20mg/day. Initially, I was actually doing fine and great emotionally but had side effects like massive fatigue everyday (not even 3 cups of coffee could wake me up!) and constipation every time I went to poop (sorry for TMI). I also felt like a zombie for a brief period in which I was neither happy nor sad. In May 2016, I decided to abruptly stop taking the Prozac by choice without consulting my doctor (bad move!) and had brain zaps and mood swings which I assumed as worsening depression. I then just asked my doctor to simply increase my dose because I thought I was getting worse (bad move again!). I was put on 40mg/day from June - August 2016 in which I was ok at first but then I was hit with a panic attack so severe I had to rush to the ER. For that week, I was having very severe symptoms. So I was instructed to go back down to 20mg/day. From then on, I decided to stop taking it a few months ago in September because I felt better and didn't want to rely on medication anymore to make me happy. I consulted with my psychiatrist who said for me to just take 10mg for one month and then I can stop. I did just that. Over the month of October I was fine and felt completely normal. However, I realized symptoms would come later once the month of November started. I have since felt every type of symptom under the sun including brain zaps, hot flushes, insomnia, irritability, tingling sensation of the skin, anxiety, shortness of breath, sweating, tremors, and slight vertigo. I have never felt these symptoms in my life til now! I've talked to my doctor and he doesn't believe in withdrawals. At this point I feel helpless. I am experiencing waves and windows in which I have waves of really bad flare ups and then windows of good normal days where I feel fine. But they keep cycling back and forth. I now have questions to ask: 1. Do windows of no symptoms mean that my body is getting better? 2. Should I reinstate the Prozac and taper off more gradually? Someone suggested I shouldn't because I've already been clean for 3 months now. But what do you guys think? 3. Will symptoms go away if I keep pushing cold turkey? 4. Should I try medical weed to help ease tthe symptoms? I want to try natural ways of healing
  18. Hello I will give a brief summary of what has happened after taking most recent drugs. I am a 21 yr old college student, low-income and person of color who recently had to drop their studies (September) due to what I think is OCD and quit their job (November) due to never before experienced debilitating and frightening symptoms. These began after stopping Luvox 50 mg and Prozac 20 mg. I have never been warned or informed or properly tapered off any psychotropic drug by any psychiatrists I have seen including the one (due to insurance I can only speak with him once a month) who prescribed me the last four recent drugs. I was unfortunately very naive in my decisions surrounding these drugs. For clarity: I was being treated for "depression" and anxiety. Started at age 17. My signature is copied off records of prescription dates. For the most part I did not take pills regularly, I remember last year organizing my room and seeing that I had bottles full of pills I never took. A lot of prescriptions were what the psychiatrists called trial and error, so I was trying pills to see their effects which were miss which made me realize they were making me sick so I stopped. I unfortunately cannot remember which ones I did take consistently prior to this year (2021). Up until summer I was taking propranolol as needed for anxiety/stress (it had been I think ~1 yr more or less since I had taken any drug). During the summer I needed and wanted guidance to cope with anxiety/stress in the form of therapy. Through my insurance I emailed and left calls for many people but did not get responses and was getting discouraged. I was so desperate for relief that I was prescribed buspirone 10 mg, which did initially provide a calming relief. In the beginning of September 2021, I was overwhelmed with work and inability to properly cope with my internal problems which was taking a toll on my studies. *Here is where details become very blurry. I let the current psychiatrist know and he prescribed me Fluvoxamine 50 mg. The first two times I took it in the evening and found that it made me restless, it did not let me sleep. So I switched to taking it in the mornings and cut it in half; it still made me restless and I would be very sleepy during the day. I let the psychiatrist know and he told me to switch to Prozac 20 mg. I took it once it the morning before work and the restlessness was awful, I could not sleep at all. Note: I do remember taking advil pm and even buspirone alongside the fluvoxamine at the same time to abate the restlessness. I ceased all medications and after that and since then I have been experiencing things I have never experienced before. -acute short-term memory loss and other gaps in memory* -frightening confusion* -cognitive problems* -weird thinking and feelings I do not know the words to describe* -vision problems (after-image, visual snow/static, visual distortion, stars in vision)* -loss of personality and identity* -head ache/pain/pressure mostly* (this has been consistent, I remember waking up one day before work in October to a sharp pain only in the right side of my head, then afterwards feeling pressure localized around only the right side of my head/eye, and now a bit of the top of my head) -slipping in and out of consciousness when closing my eyes* -dpdr* -auditory problems (cannot focus on what I'm listening)* -feeling stuck in my head* -intrusive thoughts like never before* -hypnagogia -disorientation -delirium -coordination and balance problems -fear and dread -lack of motivation -bizzare dreams -heart/chest pain -dreadful anxiety for no reason -severe depression/anhedonia (I have never in my life experienced actual depression)* -crying so much There are more but I cannot remember right now. The ones with asterisks are the most concerning for me. Everything came on so suddenly and abruptly and unprecedentedly. I am so afraid that I am developing a more serious mental illness and that I will have to take more drugs which I do not want. I have no support system, my family is busy and other people I know are as well. The psychiatrist doesn't think the drugs did anything. With what strength I have, I was able to schedule a neurologist appointment and will be getting studies done. I feel that I am wasting their time. I think deep down I want this to be something physical that can be cured. Which I know is wishful and doesn't serve me good. I am trying my best to not let my fear get to me but I am constantly reminded of my decisions. I am beyond heartbroken, this is not who I am. I am a spirited and passionate person, I do not know what to do as I wait for answers.
  19. ezzytalloprawn

    ezzytalloprawn

    Hi all, I have a 16 year history on SSRI/SNRI (see signature) as well as a few years on Mirtazapine and one year on Bupropion. The two latter I quit fairly easy without any tapering worth mentioning. I'm also a medical doctor. I've read this forum now and it's been very helpful. The main reason I'm now registering is I'd like to contribute to the Escitalopram tapering thread, where there seems to be a quite well established misconception about the water solubility of the drug (I don't seem to be able to repy there yet though). Escitalopram is, as the post states, "sparingly soluble" in water (and "soluble" in saline water). Sparingly soluble by definition means that it takes 30-100 ml of water to fully dissolve 1 g of a chemical (such as a drug). (I'll still to 100 ml instead of 30 - 100 ml for simplicity, and 100 ml is at the less solvable end of the spectrum) 1 g is 1000 mg. So, with 100 ml of water you can dissolve ONE HUNDRED 10 mg pills of Escitalopram (as the salt Escitalopram oxalate). To dissolve one 10 mg pill, you need only 1 ml of water. I suspect most people will use much more water than this, as 1. there is no reason to work with such a small amount of water and 2. people seem to think you need lots of water. So, let's say that you use 10 ml or more instead of the necessary 1 ml. Now, there is NO reason whatsoever to increase solubility by adding sodium chloride (i e, making a saline solution), worrying about decreased solubility in refrigerator temperatures, etc. Note, there is stuff in the pills that does not dissolve, but the active drug does, easily. On the term "sparingly soluble": from a required 30-100 ml of water to dissolve 1 g of Escitalopram follows that in 100 ml water the amount of solvable Escitalopram is 1 - 3.3333333... g. Compare this to table salt (sodium chloride) which I believe you can dissolve 36 g of in 100 ml of water. Hence, it is easy to understand why "sparingly" is appropriate.
  20. Hi everyone. I should probably start by saying that I'm 29 and Autistic, and have lived with a degree of anxiety and depression for I would say probably my whole life. I left my casual job back in 2016, which was all I could manage, because it had started to make my anxiety and depression considerably worse. My GP prescribed me lexapro, and I eventually upped the dose to 20mg. In 2018 I decided I wanted to come off the meds, and did so with really no issues. I was off for about 8 months, until in early 2019 I decided I needed a new medication, so went on Fluoxetine, my apologies, but I don't remember the dosage. During this time, I experienced a panic attack whilst driving and developed panic disorder, so with my GP I came off Fluoxetine and went back on Lexapro. My GP also prescribed me Lorazepam 1mg to be taken as needed. Half way through 2021 I got with my partner. After around a year of being together, the sexual side effects of Lexapro were starting to really get to me. Basically I had no feeling in my penis, and I could get it up, but I couldn't finish. This accompanied with around a 20kg weight gain really got to me, and I decided to start tapering off Lexapro in July of this year. I tapered down over roughly 2 and a half to three months, and whilst it definitely wasn't fun, it wasn't horrible. Anyway, in the time it's been since being off the lexapro, around 2 and a half months now, I'd probably say that I've been worse than I was when I was still on them. The only real plus side is that the sexual side effects have gone away. The thing that is hands down getting to me the most, is that I've developed body pain, which I'm experiencing pretty much everywhere, and it seems to have slowly gotten worse. I spent almost a week at my partners house with them helping them to look after their pets while their parents were on a holiday. Since I've come back this past Thursday I've had very bad pain in my back, barely been able to sit up or get out of bed. Just now as I'm typing this, I've just gotten home from being out for about an hour and a half with my support worker, and the pain has flared up again a bit and I had to go straight to lie in bed. I should note a couple of other things, I took 7 lorazepam, 3 in one day, 2 the day after, and then 2 a couple of days after that in the last week and a half. Mainly because there were a few things I had to do that cause me quite some anxiety. Also, both my partner and my sister have fibromyalgia, my partner was diagnosed 10 years ago. Now I've seen my doctor about the pain, had blood tests done, and been prescribed naproxen. I have no inflamation in my blood and the naproxen doesn't seem to work. My GP says I could have fibro and that it's common for pain to come on after stopping anti depressants. I just don't really know what to do. I can deal with mental pain by itself, but then throw in physical pain too and I feel like I just can't handle it. I'm going back to see my GP on Thursday, but I feel at a bit of a loss at the moment to be honest.
  21. Hey guys, My past medications: these were most recent, from the age of 15 onward: - Pristiq - 100 mg - Abilify - 15 mg - Fluoxetine - 20 mg - L-methyl folate (supplement) - Adderrall XR (in morning) - forget dosage - Adderrall , 2 throughout day - forget dosage When I was 10, I was dealing with a lot of anxiety due to an unstable home life at my Mom’s. I was diagnosed with anxiety and began taking Fluoxetine after an initial meeting with a psychologist followed by a psychiatrist. At age 15, I attempted suicide and was admitted to a teen unit at a local hospital. There, I was placed on many of the medications that would later be incredibly difficult to discontinue. By age 20, I had erectile dysfunction, weighed ≈285 pounds at 6’, couldn’t concentrate on anything, was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes, had severely limited vision in both eyes, slept 12 hours per night, had a constant feeling of emptiness, and had an overall feeling of not being present in my life (just kind of floating around). On March 12th, 2020 (yes, at the beginning of the pandemic), I stopped everything Cold Turkey. It probably wasn’t the smartest move, but I’m so glad I did it. I went through about 4 months of what I can only describe as hell. Vomiting, diarrhea, alternating between sleeping for 12 hours and 3 hours per night, and a rollercoaster of emotions I’d never felt before. I’m currently 185 pounds, diabetes free, updated my license yesterday to remove my vision restriction (my vision corrected), have a pretty good running/ weightlifting habit / Nutrition approach going, I just finished 2 years at a local Community College with a 3.2 overall GPA in a transfer program to a B.S. in Chemistry, and life is fantastic. Everything works well, I’m feeling real, genuine emotions for the first time in my life, and I’m thrilled to be alive. The only drawback from this whole discontinuation process is that I now can’t stay in bed for more than 6-7 hours. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, getting the vision restriction from my license removed yesterday prompted me to speak about my story (I guess you could call it a personal milestone). I’m still navigating the whole relationship, being human, and experiencing emotions part of everything but I can say that for once in my life, I’m very happy. Feel free to ask me anything. Thanks everyone, Connor
  22. Hope everyone is doing well. I wanted to start with a quick synopsis of my medical background below. I took SSRI antidepressants for 17+ years. I started with Prozac for 5 years from 15-21. Then I took Escitalopram from 22-32. Along the way I was put on Trazodone, Buspar, Ambien and Wellbutrin as well. All in an attempts to control my anxiety/depression and inability to sleep. Also a little mental history - I was bullied from about the age of 9 to the age of 16. It's pretty obvious in hindsight why I was depressed/anxious. I thought the people in this world were mean. I thought everywhere I went was an unsafe place because at this time it was. In response to this I took up boxing and working out so I could become stronger than my bullies. In all honesty it worked. As soon as I became strong and in shape I became popular out of nowhere, which was an interesting transition. Anyways, that's another story for another time. At 15 I visited the doctor because I always held things to myself because I never told my parents I was being bullied or that life outside of my bedroom sucked. They just thought I was sad/depressed. Depression also runs deep in my family. My mother has been on an extreme cocktail of antidepressants since she was about 20. Although this cocktail has been quite a rollercoaster for her as well. She thought this was the only way to help. I had no one to talk to and I felt like the world was an unsafe and scary place so when the doctor prescribed anti depressants and the anxiety disappeared I thought it was a miracle. At this time the extreme side effects didn't matter to me. The fact I lost my ability to feel empathy because I was numb didn't matter because I didn't like people enough to care to empathize with them. I thought I was going to make it in this world on my own come hell or high water. This idea set me off on a path of perfectionism, egocentrism, hedonism and drug abuse. This life is not meant to be lived alone. To make sure this story doesn't become a novel I'm going to go ahead and summarize it here. For 16 years I went on a binger of sorts. Chasing all the highs this world has to offer. Whether this be dating multiple women, chasing drugs and festival culture, chasing adrenaline highs in the form of mountain biking, power lifting or cliff diving. I kept chasing thrills to fill the emotional void left by the SSRI. I also had to be perfect at this point. I had to have a straight A's in college. A quick aside (I had a long period of alcohol addiction that ran in parallel with my SSRI usage from about 16-21). This caused me to fall behind in life so I felt like I had to catch-up quick, mixed with the perfectionism created from early bullying it caused an immense amount of anxiety in my day to day life. I wasn't allowed to rest, make a mistake or simply apologize when I was wrong. This caused insane amounts of chaos in my relationships throughout these years. Finally when I hit about 31 I decided I had enough of this chaos. A 6-year relationship and all of my life long friendships finally collapsed on me. They were built on a false human. They were built on a man that didn't exist. I see myself as two people honestly. The person that was on anti-depressants is not the same human I am off them. Honestly in my mind half the withdrawal is realizing you built a life not suitable to the person you are off the medicine. I moved to a new area and started a new life. I also quit my anti-depressants. I began hiking and looking inward. It took about 6 months from the insomnia, brain zaps, panic attacks and extreme social anxiety to subside. I managed these symptoms with extreme self inquiry. I also started walking daily. I'm running out of time to write this so let me summarize this pretty quickly here. I'm not perfectly better now. I think anxiety/depression are a part of existence now. I accept there will be days I'm tired/scared and will have panic attacks, but I've learned to sit with these emotions and understand this too shall pass. Getting of my anti-depressant also gave me my empathy back. I built closer connections with people than I've had in the past 17 years. It was extremely hard to rebuild a social support system and a new life while quitting the SSRI though. I would say overall life feels deeper now though. In summary: 1) Took SSRI's for 17+ years. Felt like a zombie. I won't say it was all bad. If you are suicidal and have no other options I would say these are better than that alternative. If you believe you have any other options though I would urge you to try them all out. 2) Quit SSRI's at 32. Created a new life. 3) Anxiety/depression still exists but I now just believe these to be a part of life as opposed to something to get rid of. 4) Found a social support system that saved me, built around the real me. Sorry for jumping around so much on this post. I was trying to work from home at the same time. So I kept jumping back into it. If anyone has any questions feel free to let me know!
  23. Elisabet

    Elisabet

    Hi, I was on sertraline for around 9 years, due to anxiety. I have had anxiety as long as I can remember, tend to ruminate, but have lived with it and it has mostly worked alright. Some periods I have not had it at all, but it is usually there. It has been in a way that I have been able to work and function though. I had just moved countries at the time I started sertraline, had two little ones and started a new job I wasn't comfortable in. I had tried cbt but think in hindsight that the therapist was just not right for me. I do believe in cbt and has had great help from that later on. I also have pmt. Starting sertraline helped me, after maybe ten days of anxiety and restlessness, worse than anything I had ever experienced in my life. I have since then tried to stop at least a couple of times. Once alone (stupidly) and also with help from a gp. I failed though. I have experienced head "zaps", a pinching feeling behind my ears that I have noticed in terms of withdrawal, restlessness in my limbs, tension and an anxiety so extreme it has really been hard to deal with. In hindsight, I probably was my best when I was on 25 mg sertraline, a lot more energetic and happier than when I was on 50 mg. I have also experienced my ruminating problems but in such an exaggerated and extreme way. Not like how I remember it before sertraline. This last time I tapered very slowly for two years, and had a great doctor who supported me. Then I moved countries and met a gp who suggested we could switch the last, at that stage 12,5 mg of sertraline to fluoxetine. This was done but the dosage I was asked to take meant I got down to the equivalent of 6 mg of sertraline, so for me who had tapered slowly, 1-2 mg, 6 mg seemed like a lot. I reacted with extreme anxiety, compulsive thinking and pure dread, I did not recognise myself at all. The doctor suggested to take out the fluoxetine as well, after I had been on it maybe 6 weeks. This was in the beginning of July this year. The first bad period lasted about a month with anxiety and my sleep was just not working. Then it got quite a bit better in August (although not a 100%). Then three weeks ago I started experiencing the same difficulties I had in July. Extreme feelings of guilt and ruminating, an anxiety that feels so much more physical than how I remember that it used to be before sertraline. It feels extreme and long lasting, few breaks. I also feel sad and down, crying a lot, every day, which has never, not before sertraline either, been typical for me. I do not recognise myself. I have had my anxiety before but overall been quite happy. I am in contact with the same gp and whilst I don't feel entirely comfortable with him, he is very engaged and he thinks it is withdrawal as well, which is very much my interpretation too. I have some medications to help me get through this. Physical symptoms have been the pinching feeling behind my ears, tension and a restlessness in my limbs. An overall mental sickness feeling that is hard to describe, like I am totally out of balance. I really want to get through this but I am finding it hard to not know how long it is going to last? The obsessive thinking is making everything so hard at the moment. They did help but never did I think I would be on them for years, it was never my intention. I wonder if anyone else has experienced something similar? Any idea how long it can last and what can help? I understand that getting on ssri again probably would help but it has now been so long that I wish I could manage to push through (but obviously there are limits at the same time.) I exercise and try to do things that are good for me but it is tough at the moment.
  24. Hello! I am in a hell of withdrawal. I have been on many different SSRI’s in the past and they all worked but had intolerable side effects. About a year ago I started sertraline, and when it didn’t work my psych put me on Abilify and lamotrigine. The Abilify seemed to help a bit but gave me crazy anxiety and tardive skenesis. The lamotrigine has never seemed to do anything. Since last March I have been trying to taper. I’ve had two terrible experiences when my doc told me to stop the S and A cold turkey. I’m back on low doses of both. Currently I take 12.5mg sertraline, 2mg Abilify, 200 mg lamotrigine and would like to get off all of them, if possible. I have terrible anxiety and crying spells that I’ve had since starting the sertraline and Abilify. Im wondering which drug I should try to taper first?? Thanks for your help!
  25. Hi all. I’m writing on behalf of my husband. Bit of background: 2003 was put on Prozac for 3 months- no adverse reaction and subsequently various doses of venlafaxine which he successfully came off of with no issues. 2013 was switched from Venlafaxine to sertraline. Had ‘activation syndrome’ (extreme anxiety) for 8 weeks (always thought it was him) but went away once body used to drug. August 2021 had been on 25mg for years and thought he would taper over 2 months, successfully came off no issues or problems. january 2022- I was having a C section and he was a bit worried, nothing extreme though, just normal worry and decided to reinstate the Sertraline. Within days, ‘activation syndrome’ was back. He stayed on for 5 weeks and then doctor said ‘come off as you weren’t anxious or depressed to start with’ symptoms of withdrawal started but manageable. He thought after 6 weeks that it wasn’t withdrawal as nhs website said it should have gone after 2 weeks! March 2022- started mirtazapine at 15mg going up to 30mg. Fine for 3 weeks, but then developed activation syndrome and quickly came off. GP advised to go back on to sertraline at a bigger dose- ended up in a and e, so agitated! 3 weeks later, he thought that the mirtazapine might be less activating at a smaller dose, so went back on at 15mg… alas, 3 weeks later, activation syndrome is back! june 5th came off and has been battling severe anxiety, but generally, every other day! I am aware of windows and waves but don’t understand this. One day he’s perfect and the next can’t leave the house! He also started propanalol in June which we feel makes it worse as apparently it blocks seritonin to a degree, but makes anxiety a lot worse if he reduces (or maybe he did too big a jump). NHS have left us to it, no help! Have a private appointment on Monday. Questions are: If he is getting windows this early on, is it a good sign?! The only symptom he has is extreme anxiety/agitation which seems more a reaction to lack of seritonin, thus firing out tons of cortisol? Could he go on a low dose of Prozac to see if that helps? Prozac is the only antidepressant he doesn’t think caused activation syndrome?! is there any experiences with propanalol making matters worse? I think there is a slight improvement in the anxiety but considering it’s only been out of his system for 6 weeks I expect takes a lot longer to build new pathways etc/level out. Thanks for reading. Just want my husband back, it’s destroying me and him!
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