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I have severe GAD diagnosed in early 2018. After trying to manage it on my own for a couple of months I finally asked my dr for an anti anxiety medication. she put me on 75 mg of Effexor, and I started taking it on May 2019. It worked incredibly. in February 2023, my main stressor for anxiety got resolved and wanting to get pregnant soon I decided to taper. I tapered from March 2023 - June 2023 using the bead counting method with my drs instructions. At first I thought I got away with it but I was wrong. Just like many others of us I developed severe insomnia and haven’t been able to shake it off to this date. I reached back out to my dr and worked with a psychiatrist both of whom agreed I benefit from sleeping meds. I tried taking 25 mg of Vistaril and while that worked okay, it made me very groggy the next day. Then my psych decided to switch me to Trazadone 25 mg and that worked ok. Today, I have not been able to sleep at all and it’s too late to take anything. I’ve taken the day off from work and made an appointment with my dr to talk about potentially reinstating — Effexor is not safe during pregnancy so maybe something else. I just don’t feel good in general and am feeling like I’m suffering more than I need to and need something to give. thanks in advance for welcoming me to the community, we’ll get through this!

I am on 30mg mirtazapine and 50mg trazodone for 3 months. I would like to taper but not stable enough. I have been through hell with valium, hopefully this shows in my signature although I can't see it here. I am still not functioning and suffering beyond words. As I write this horrible painful jabs of anxiety stab up my arms and throat. If I wait to heal, and do a long slow taper, will the ad withdrawal be okay? Does ad withdrawal cause anxiety that makes you call out, rock, suffer pain, be unable to function? I have been on the mirt 3 months. I imagine I need to wait another 3-6 months before starting to taper? I do not care about having anxious thoughts. I do not care about brain fog or suffering depression. I need the physical anxiety feelings of pain in throat and chest, painful surges up body and arms, gone. I want to be able to sit back on my sofa and watch tv. I am worried I am too traumatised to recover. I have suffered for over a year with internal aka, writhing around, pulling hair, banging head, unable to breathe, crawling around, violent shaking of every body part...now I am 6 months off the valium and these most serious symptoms have stopped, but still have the painful surges and the painful throat and chest tightness. I was only getting 2 hours sleep until the mirtazapine. I now get 4-6 hours sleep. I don't know how much longer the drug will keep working for this. I worry I will need to kill myself every day, as my "life" is intolerable.

It was over two years ago that I finally weaned off of sertraline and trazodone, which I was prescribed to get through a "short" rough patch in 2019. I tried to get off a few times prior, which I now understand probably "kindled" my system. I thought I was being cautious. When I did finally get off of these things, I experienced sensations and emotions that I never could have imagined: my first panic attack (and I've been stuck in a low-grade state of panic ever since) suicidal thoughts each morning, when I jolt awake and have trouble breathing (still the case) DP/DR set in, and I have constant tension on the right side of my body, probably a sympathetic nervous system malfunction (though the DP/DR has resolved, thank god) irritable and oversensitive to just about everything -- movies, music, other people, the news (this is unbearable and makes it hard to function) tinnitus very loud; lights are so bright I feel like they're passing through me (this alone is enough to set someone over the edge -- and has not resolved at all) I'm so tired in my soul, it's impossible to convey. I have held on this long and tried many things. Somatic therapy, other drug therapies, rTMS. I'm staying with friends in Switzerland to try a new social context that gets me out of bed every day. They've been encouraging but I'm suffering tremendously. I'm just not going to last in this condition. It's such an unbelievable waste. Any advice you can give this late in the process would be so very welcome.

I recently completed a 14-month taper off of 30 mg of Flurazepam in July 2023 (after more than 10 years of use) and did a quick taper off of 6.25 mg of Ambien in October 2023 (after 6 months of use). I started taking 125 mg of Trazadone to help me sleep during my Flurazepam taper. I’ve been on Trazadone for 3 years and I’d like to taper it because it’s doing nothing for sleep. It’s like an empty pill that I keep taking because if I stop taking it, I’m immediately back into sleepless nights. I need some semblance of sleep to work and support my family. I am desperately hoping to get my natural sleep back after tapering Ambien and Flurazepam this year. Is Trazadone holding back my sleep? It should be helping it but I think I’ve built a tolerance to it, plus I’m likely in benzo induced insomnia. Does anyone have any experience with being trazadone tolerance? How hard was it to taper off of trazadone?

Good day I would like to hear sincere advice. I started taking Cipralex 10 mg after an uterus myomas operation for severe headaches. When I started taking this medicine, I had a serious side effect, I suffered from it and thought it should be. Insomnia occurs, there was high anxiety, inequality, headache, nausea, dizziness. It all lasted about six weeks. Five months later, with the permission of a doctor, I try to stop taking medication, but this is almost impossible. High anxiety and fear (it was not against drug abuse). The burning body, headache and whole body, the doctor does not know what to do. I do not need to take drugs for 10 days. Please advise what to do, how can I overcome these exclusion cases? How long will it last?start to understand why many people take medication for a long time, it is not possible to stop them directly, and feel less well off than before taking medication. When I reduced my medication, I took 5 mg for one month, then in a week at 2.5 mg and I completely stopped. Now I'm taking vitamin c, b vitamins, minerals, omega 3. My doctor's only advice is to go back to medicine. I also go to psychotherapy, KET.If you did not have depression before taking medication, then such a terrible symptom might really occur.

Hi, is there someone I can message or speak to who can help me with a tapering schedule and who can try help me figure out what's going on with me?

Hi all, In mid July of 2022 I went cold turkey from duloxetine 60mg + bupropion 150mg SR. I went through complete hell with huge changes in my life (living situation, loss of friends who left the city, new job) and had a had time separating those stressors with withdrawal. My life was upside down and I went back on duloxetine 30mg in mid October 2022, along with Trazodone 12.5mg for sleep. I got through it, but continued to have deep underlying stress from opening a new business. Upon reflection I am not sure if I ever recovered from that withdrawal/cold turkey situation. In mid August of this summer, regrettably I went cold turkey again from the duloxetine. I think a couple weeks later I stopped taking the Trazodone because it was making me too tired. I am currently on week 10 of cold turkey, and suffering. My symptoms are increasing. I thought I was just stressed and anxious from my work, but it hit me this week that I'm going through withdrawal. This whole time I've had a hard time separating normal stress/tension due to life from withdrawal and it has come crashing down on me that what I'm going through is not normal stress. I thought I was just anxious and stressed from life and work. I used to love sleeping in (probably because I was too tired from the damn drugs) and relishing in my dreams. Now I wake up without an alarm and am gripped with tension and pins and needles and a flush of cortisol that feels like poison in my body. I am extremely tense in my body. Prickling. Burning. Like hot poison is settling into my stomach. It feels like I am plugged into a socket getting electrocuted. My nerves are frayed, singed, and burning. My jaw is clenched. My heart is beating. The past few days for the first time in this withdrawal cycle I've experienced vertigo, dizziness. I cannot cope with stressful situations - they throw me over the edge and into the fire and it takes days to recover and unclench from an intolerable level to the barely tolerable level I'm at now. I can't make decisions and am gripped by fear and confusion. My work for my business is suffering. I have a wonderful opportunity in my lap and I'm worried that I'm destroying what's right in front of me. I cannot calm down or relax. I am beating myself up hard for doing this to myself, AGAIN. But I can't go back. I can only cope with what is happening now. I thought I could tough it out and wait it out since it's been 10 weeks. But I'm starting to realize that is foolish and it doesn't have to be this way. I don't want to feel like this any longer and I don't want it to get any worse. I was recommended to start at 10mg of duloxetine over at Cymbalta Hurts Worse. Any insight or offering would be so appreciated. I get overwhelmed by the severity, complexity, and depth of this situation. I don't know if I ever healed from the original cold turkey jump off in July 2022. I don't know if I'm impacted still more than a year later by going cold turkey off Wellbutrin and not reinstating. I don't know if I'm impacted by going cold turkey off Traz too. I'm confused and devastated. I am very scared that I damaged my body permanently. I am very scared that this is going to last much longer. I have a psychiatrist who I like for her talk therapy but she clearly doesn't know what to do in this situation. She thought I was just stressed too and thought that I should be in the clear 2-3 weeks after stopping. I do not blame her but the system. Any hope that this is going to get better, any insight that I didn't ruin my body and mind for the foreseeable future. I am not suicidal, I want to live, but the way I feel now makes me understand why people would want to end it. Any insight on how to reinstate or re-stabilize. I want to feel better. Thank you all for your work here. This is an amazing place and it helps to know I am not alone.

Hi Everyone, I’ve been on Bupropion 300xl since beginning of 2019 so almost 5 years. I also was taking Trazodone 50mg nightly for sleep and dropped to 25mg for a month or so then discontinuing it around June 2023. I also discontinued Losartan a blood pressure med around the same time. The doctor said my blood pressure was doing great and I could come off if, I wanted to. Around July 2023, I started to experience anxiety creeping in slowly due to a trigger thought from my past. I let it manifest and get bigger and bigger day by day until I went in full panic mode. It got so bad I went to VA hospital where I get care and they gave me Hydroxyzine for anxiety and panic attacks. I took it but it really didn’t help the anxiety was too strong at this point. I wasn’t sleeping very good. Had a couple more panic attacks. I then went back to the VA and saw mental health provider who told the Bupropion was causing the anxiety. He dropped me from 300xl to 150mg (75 ir X 2 a day).and started buspar 5mg morning and 5mg night. This was 21 Sep 23. I take the bupropion at 6am and 2pm. I also had a blood panel, thyroid test, and ekg to rule those out for the anxiety. All came back normal. I also started therapy. I stopped taking the buspar after a week. Didn’t really feel it was doing anything and made me feel weird. The anxiety has been debilitating at times it seems to be getting better slowly day by day. I’ve never had it this extreme in my 47 years. I’m retired from the Navy after 20 years and have had some stressful situations but this has really got me. I went back and saw mental health twice saying this a rough ride not being able to sleep a full night and the anxiety. They gave me rameron 30mg to take at night. I took it one time and then didn’t take it again. Didn’t want to get started on something else and the side effects of weight gain not worth it to me. Also tried Trazodone again 100mg just to see if I could get some relief made me too groggy and didn’t really help same with Hydroxyzine 25mg. I just feel off, tired, irritable, frustrated, depression and anxiety comes and goes. Sometimes I have passing suicidal thoughts but would never act on them and I share this with my wife just so she knows what’s going through my head. They definitely scare me. Definitely affects your quality of life. I guess I just deal with it now. It’s no where near like before or at panic level. Oh and they want to put me on Prozac now. I haven’t touched it yet. I mentioned my sister is on it with good results so they feel that would be a good fit. I think I was dropped too fast on the bupropion and I’m feeling the withdrawal. It’s been five weeks now and just wanted to see what everyone’s input on this is. I want to try and be done with these meds and go natural. I don’t want to introduce more stuff that I’ll have to come off of. The biggest thing I’m dealing with is anxiety and poor sleep. I’ve looked at the taper schedule and guess I’m beyond the taper from 300xl spot. What are your recommendations at this point? I think it was odd I was dropped to 75ir x 2 a day. Any recommendations to ease the burden? Many Thanks!

I'm new to the forum. Thanks, in advance, for any insight you can provide. I started taking 100 mg of Trazodone in September, 2017 to help with sleep, and have been on it for almost 6 years I didn't realize it at the time, but looking back now (and researching a lot), It seems like my health has declined significantly since taking Trazodone. Initially I did really well on Trazodone. About 6-9 months into taking Trazodone, I started developing severe migraines. Then in 2021 I started taking Cimetidine (with the Trazodone) and developed reflux and gastroparesis. All along, I thought these were incidental occurrences, but now I'm not so sure. Here's why.... In my research, I learned that when taking Trazodone it converts to m-CPP in the body. m-CPP is eliminated from the body via the CYP2D6 enzyme. Genetic testing I had done, showed that my body does not have the CYP2D6 enzyme. Furthermore, m-CPP is said to be a cause of migraines in suseptible people. To complicate things further, I also learned that Cimetidine increases the blood concentration of Trazodone 120% (source: epha.health). Since I'm a poor metabolizer of CYP2D6, I'm wondering if the m-CPP builds up in my system/doesn't properly eliminate, and causes these horrendous headaches and other health issues. Any opinion or experience with something similar?

Hi, my name is Bjorn, I've been a long time reader of this website since my problems with AD withdrawal I experience(d) and decided to sign up for an account to make a post about myself and to maybe get some input from other members about my situation. For whole my life (39 years old now) I've never had any mental problems, I always was a strong person who went through bad periods without any problems, till in 2018 my mother-in-law died very suddenly. I lost every sense of being, got anxiety, felt wrong aswell physical as emotional and didn't knew what happened. Naturally, I got my doctor involved, had some bloodwork done and my wife insisted that they also looked at my testosterone levels. When the blood work returned, most of it was fine, but my testosterone levels were indeed way off, like below half what was minimally recommended for a healthy male person. So then the whole story began, doctor told me that it was possible because of the stressfull and emotional period I was going through that a depression set in which made those T levels completely tank, so the solution was, AD's. He put me on 5 mg escitalopram and 25 mg trazodone to help with insomnia (which I developed in that period of high stress). It took a while for everything to lighten up a bit and after several months I was fairly functional, but I started getting heartflutters/heart skipping beats which made me scared, so for which I decided to stop the AD's. I did (no taper, completely CT) and for a while it went good, till after several months I started feeling depressed again and the doctor advised me to reinstate the 5 mg escitalopram again, which I reluctantly did. Took a while again to get "normal" again and I kept taking the AD from about mid 2019 till beginning of 2022 at which point i had enough of all the AD taking and talked to my doctor about quitting, on which he replied to start taking one day on and one day off (very bad move with escitalopram because the half life of the drug made it so i was acutally creating a WD every other day.) till I decided myself to quit the AD completely and go through what was to come. I expected the WD and with my quitting in 2019 I already experienced the brain zaps (which I actually didn't find that big of a bother the 2nd time because I knew what it was and I realised WD was ongoing). After a while the brainzapping stopped and I felt pretty ok, had a little relapse of WD around the end of 2022 (around the 10 month mark) for which I contacted my doctor again, who of course tried to get me on the AD again and I said "NOPE, I need to get through this without any drugs to get better myself" and after about 2 weeks it mostly resolved and I was able to do what needed to be done again, like work, relationship etc. Which I also should mention, related to the low testosterone levels, I went to see doctors about that too and after many tests the conclusion was that I have secondary hypogonadism, so they started me on a topical gel of administering testosterone every morning which helped in getting my T levels back to where they should and I also asked to go on Tadalafil 5 mg daily for PSSD which also developed because of the AD. PSSD also solved itself, but if it's because of the Tadalfil or my raised T levels, I don't know. What I also take is daily magnesium because I know it helps with general health and I know this site "recommends" it for people with PAWS alongside omega 3, but that's something I don't take (yet). Back to now, so since the end of 2022 till about 3-4 weeks ago I felt "normal", had no problems or none which I can really think of, but 3 - 4 weeks ago I woke up from my sleep having shortness of breath, feeling panicky, went back to sleep but started to think about it a got a bit scared. Also my daughter, who's 15 years old, started having some puberty problems which caused some serious fights at home, both affecting me and my wife pretty bad mentally and as of last week I feel like **** again. Insomnia, globus feeling (tension around my throat), very emotional, anxiety, panic attacks, the whole lot. I'm feeling very dreadful at the moment. The globus feeling has gone away a bit, it's not constantly there anymore, but everything is making me very scared. I wake up very often during sleep (if i can sleep that is) with my heart racing, shortness of breath, feeling panicky. Had my bloodwork done again last week, but everything turned out fine, even cortisol levels, which i expected to be high, but they were normal. Doctor prescribed me Sulpiride, to take a quarter of a pill (which comes down to 50mg) to alleviate symptoms, but I'm very reluctant to do so because I know it can have severe adverse reactions and I don't want to add any side effects of that antipsychotic to what i'm already feeling. Any advice on this, someone? I'm aware of the windows and waves pattern, is it possible that I'm in a wave now? This would be the 20 month mark of being of any AD, so I would thin if it's a wave that it wouldn't be so bad, but this one is very bad. Sorry to make this story so long, I could make it longer but I just wanted to write down what's happening to me just to see if I would get a reply and maybe even a reply which could calm me down a bit. Greetings.

Hello, First of all, I'm incredibly grateful for this site as it has really helped me to navigate my process of attempting to go off both Zoloft and Trazadone. Before recent taper I was on an SSRI (and briefly an SSNRI) for over 22 years in total. I titrated down off Zoloft over a 5 month period (starting dose 50mg). It was challenging but I was able to manage (I'm aware that I may have done this too quickly). About two weeks after my last dose of Zoloft 6/19/23 (I used liquid to go down to 1mg before discontinuing) I began experiencing GI distress that has been persistent since (daily diarrhea, nausea, stomach pain). For the past four weeks I've been experiencing tachycardia, arrhythmia, dizziness, some issues with breath, significant anxiety, and panic symptoms (which are not a typical manifestation of my anxiety). This is complicated by the fact that I (most likely prematurely) started titrating down off of Trazadone. I've been taking 100mg for a few years nightly for perimenopausal sleep issues. Some of the more intense heart rhythm issues and anxiety started up after I lowered my Trazdone dose (I did not use the 10% rule and went down 1/4 which I now realize was too quickly and I had not given my nervous system to adjust to being off Zoloft). Because I did these changes close together it's hard for me to have a sense of what is happening. I do believe I'm having protracted withdrawal symptoms from Zoloft the are probably being compounded by adding the Trazadone taper. So, my main question here is about whether or not reinstatement of a low dose of Zoloft (even 1mg) might be advised based on these symptoms and the amount of difficulty they are causing me. Or would it make more sense for me to go back up to 100mg Trazadone (from 75 - ongoing dose for years - or possibly less) to see if this helps. The level of anxiety I'm experiencing in addition to dizziness, heart rhythm issues, and GI issues is becoming incredibly difficult to manage along with normal life stressors. Side note: I do have an appointment for an EKG, heart monitor, and other lab work to further explore heart issues. Thank you for reading and I hoping this message is clear/makes sense!

I'm 23 years old male studying psilosophy. When I entered college I suffered immensely from anxiety, I had insomnia as a result of it. I took Trazodone 50mg and then 100mg over a period of one year. I stopped 50mg cold turkey due to sexual impotence and a life without joy. I had suicidal thoughts the first month. I am depressed, restless, constant urge to cry, heaviness in my head. The suicidal thoughts returned. I have a huge temptation to go back on Trazodone again but I want a happy life, with sex, with sparkle, with real joy. It seems like it never goes away... It's been 5 months that I'm off trazodone. Has anyone gone through something similar? Is there hope that I will return to normal? I started doing psychodrama and cognitive behavioral therapy. My psychologist thinks it's better for me to endure the suffering and not take anything but I'm DESPERATE!

3 benzo tapers since 2010. Got COVID last April and brain freaked out with DR/DP. Plan was to go on 4 mg Ativan for a couple of weeks and then cross over the Klonopin but it didn't work. So I'm intolerance and been up and down on other things in poly drugged now with 375 mg depakote and 100 mg trazadone. Have not gotten very far on a liquid micro taper off the Ativan and I can't figure out how to do the taper off of depakote with the sprinkles. I need a coach on that. Major brain fog, fear, losing cognition and memory, terror, DR and paralyzed by my brain.

Hi! Long story short I already screwed up my brain, I need urgent help I was on escitalopram and trazodone on 2017 (8 months 10mg, 4 months 50 mg), went cold turkey because I couldnt get an appointment, major depression but nothing else 2021, alcohol withdrawal went back to trazodone 50-100 mg up and down (didnt know about kindling or withdrawals) until a lot of neurological issues started to appear, I was on 100 mg for almost 3 months and then cut to 50, never reinstated more and was left suffering for 6 months, then tried to completely wean off and went down to almost 20 mg and then off, had a massive withdrawal because it was way too fast, I reinstated to 25mg but felt more or less and went to 50 the next day (probably more kindling ), and now I am having an absolute adverse reaction (2 nights since reinstatement) should I go back to 25mg, should I stay on the 50, whay should I do, I am in utter hell, I have burning skin all over please help

Hello to everyone reading this. I have been lurking and reading on SA for the last 4 years or so, on and off. I have been on SSRI's (first Zoloft and then Lexapro) for about 20 years now. I have also been polydrugged with benzos and trazodone. I know these drugs are garbage, or I would have felt better by now. Instead I've felt worse, more and more sick, more and more fatigued. The child psychiatrist (!!!) who first prescribed Zoloft to me, when I was 17.5 years old, fed me the garbage information that it would benefit my brain to be on these meds. No one gave me a plan or timeline for how or when to get off. Back in 2011 I tried a fast taper by myself. It led to a horrendous crash that was hell. Feeling desperate and suicidal, I went to a psychiatrist as I didn't know of any other option. That's when I was put on Lexapro- I've been on it since then. Since then, traumas have been compounding. I entered a psychologically abusive marriage and then found the courage to leave and divorce. But the toll of the marriage was an increase of 2 psychotropic drugs (Klonopin and Trazodone). Through painstaking efforts, I have cut down to 0.5 mg Diazepam instead of Klonopin. I am a survivor of childhood emotional neglect and intergenerational trauma. I believe that my family idolized whatever MDs say as a cover for dealing with cultural/historical trauma and loss. Both my mother and I were drugged by psychiatry/family practice doctors as that's the false ideology we were ruled by. I have begun to wake up from this ideology and instead believe that our psychospiritual crises needed other resolutions (a return to the land? making art, literature, music? connection and community instead of workism?) I am tired, sad, and full of grief. I have had many non death and also death losses (abuse, divorce, circumstantial infertility, death of my mom, loss of friendships once I divorced). But I also have had mystical experiences, love poetry and wish to write poetry but am currently full of writer's block, I sing, and ironically enough have begun the process of becoming a clinician myself. This has been a fraught decision as I struggle to work within harming systems. If I ever succeed in becoming drug free, I want to have part of my practice be helping others to undertake this journey. Thank you for reading so far. I am inspired by the brave warriors on this site who are listening to their own wisdom and taking this arduous, lonely, painful but important journey.

Xanax. 25 mg 25 years for vertigo. Switch to valium 5 months off a year long taper Trazadone 20 mg started taper last month. Buspirone 35 mg.

just need to understand the taper, im on 250mg of trazodone, started tapering on my own cause i had no where to turn and noone to guide, since i was directed to this board can you please so that i can be sure to do this right, i strated doing 200mg, as i read the board i see its wrong, i have been doing 200mg from tuesday to thursday when i saw this board friday i started doing 225mg for the 10 percent, i had stop 1 day before i reinstated and began tapering, no one told me i was gonning get addictive, i was shaking and itching when i had stop, im still itching and not feeling myself. anyway saturday i did 225mg and tonight i will do 225mg, am i on the right track, thanks in advance.

Hello everybody, I'm a girl from Europe and I am having some troubles with withdrawal. I started taking Venlafaxine 75mg 10 years ago when I was still very young because of light depression and was pretty quickly upped to 225mg. 5 years ago I first started tapering. Down to 37,5mg in about 1,5 years and then stopped. It was pretty tough but mostly not completely debilitating until around 8 months of stopping when I started having severe insomnia and a lot of other difficult symptoms like DR, akathisia, anxiety (or maybe I should say terror), aches and a lot of other stuff. I thought I was going crazy. I was put on a few different antidepressants but nothing helped and I ended up with the Venlafaxine again on low dose. I was still feeling pretty bad on it and was not really depressed and could not stand being on it anymore so I tried to get off it several times over the next year but always had immediate insomnia and panic and went back on. Then I finally found this site and stayed on the same dose of 10mg for 8 months. I was feeling very bad for a while but I felt I recovered quickly so I made the decision to just quit it (I tapered the 10mg slowly over 2 months) around 8 months ago. The past months have been very hard but it was bearable, I got quite good at handling all the weird things that were happening to me, avoiding triggers as good as possible. The most persistent and horrible symptom is my insomnia. I never used to have any troubles with insomnia but since it started the first time I went off the medication, it never really went away. There were times when it was better but for 8 months now it takes me hours to fall asleep, often I wake up soon after. It was bearable because I would still get a couple of hours of sleep most nights but for two weeks now I am barely sleeping at all and of course that makes all the symptoms so much more difficult. I am freaking out a little. I try to stay positive but I tried pretty much all the advice on here and nothing seems to help. Before this started two weeks ago I actually felt like I was getting better, now I wonder if it was just a torturous honeymoon phase. I am so scared of my good sleep not coming back. How will I recover then I wonder? What if it isnt even withdrawal? I read other peoples stories but it seems most do not have this problem for so long or so severely and I am worried it wont go away anymore. I know it is part of WD to constantly question whether one will ever get better and I try to tell myself that it will but it is really hard right now. This whole thing is quite exhausting, this has been going on for so long and I am upset with myself for quitting so rapidly when I had finally stabilized a little. But I am trying to stay positive, hopefully someone has some advice. I have been browsing this site for a while now and it has helped me a lot, so thank you to everybody working here to help others through this time.

As a 60 yo woman I took a hard look at my past life of various antidepressants since 1981 inevitably winding up with a 40 year RX drug habit, over weight and in pain. I'm active and eat health following an anti inflammatory diet w/ very little dairy or gluten and was just stuck physically. June 6th 2023 I made the decision to do a hard reset and stop My high dose Paxil and Deseryl and Xanax, not taper. As you'd expect the following week was of your typical physical drug withdrawal response, insomnia, loss of appetite, diaphorsis etc. What I didn't expect was that in the second week I started to feel an undeniable amount of strength returning, muscle coordination improvement and lack of pain. A high akin to a mushroom trip with heightened senses of pleasure, euphoria and an overwhelming sense of calm. I feel awake for the first time in decades. No unwanted thoughts or emotions, I have 40 years of coping skills and cognitive behavioral therapy in my arsenal. My gut health was the first to return to normal - there was No more bloating , constipation or abdominal pain. The chronic pain I'd been suffering with limiting my ADLs was GONE! And remains that way. I now have the flexibility of my teenage self and am back to practicing yoga on the floor with relatives ease. It's almost as if every cell in my being is undergoing a rebirth and is new again. The only side effect I have found unpleasant is scattered facial numbness which I'm hoping will ease its way back to normal as well. The 'electrical shocks' were an interesting side effect , it feels as though the nerves in my body are awaking again for the first time and I feel great. It's only been 20 days and I feel newborn and loving it... Finding this site has been a relief. There is No Support available for Antidepressant Withdrawl. It is not even discussed in the Healthcare industry. To entertain this thought process is considered non complainant , a 'behavioral' abnormality. I am in control of my mind, my body and my senses for the first time in my life ❤️

Utek (Jeff) Hello new friends: Attempting to get off Mirtazacrap Hello, I will try to make this as coherent as possible. By my estimation, my brain is functioning at around 50-60% of what was normal. But that is a vast improvement over just a couple of weeks ago. First, I would like to say one thing about mirtazapine. If it were not for the next day brain fog, sleepiness, fatigue, dizziness, lethargy, and worsening bph symptoms, and weight gain, it would be a pretty good sleeping pill. The last couple of years have been difficult for me and my parents, as I know it has been for the rest of the world also. But I really handled it like a superstar. My Dad was in the last stages of dementia, and he got covid. My mother has a mild case of MS, so I had my hands full. Being an only child put all the responsibility on me. My Dad died in March, 2022. I then decided to focus all of my efforts on the health and happiness of my Mother. We had a couple good weeks. Due to a cascading series of negative health events for my Mother involving afib, paranoid delusions, and 2 lengthy hospital stays, I rapidly lost the ability to sleep. On August 2, I was sleeping about an hour a night. I had nurses helping me with my Mother, but I still had loads of responsibilities. I was barely functional. It took great effort just to write a check. (From what I know now, my cortisol levels must have been off the chart.) After a month of little to no sleep, my best friend drove me to the Emergency Room at the VA. They gave me trazodone and hydroxyzine. I also got appointments for primary care and the psych doctor a week later. The first night I got 6 hours sleep with the trazodone, but felt horrific the next day. I did not mess with the hydroxyzine. After the first night, I only got around 3 hours sleep. Through some kind of miracle (“Jesus take the wheel”) I was able to drive myself the VA the next week to see the psych doctor. She gave me mirtazapine and Buspar. I sort of freaked out, because I remembered we gave my Dad a low dose of mirtazapine to help with his appetite. I took a Buspar that day but it made me so dizzy that I never took another one. After researching Mirt online, I decided to stick with the trazodone. Trazodone just did not work for me. I was only sleeping around 3 hours a night. I reluctantly switched to Mirtazapine a week later. The first night on mirtazapine, I slept over six hours but felt like the walking dead the next day. After the first night, I could only sleep a couple of hours on mirtazapine, and I still had the next day hangover symptoms. This is when things really got bad for me. I am a lover of life but I didn't want to live anymore. I was just so tired. The next 5 days were bad, and dark, and then suddenly I began to sleep 6 to 8 hours on the mirtazapine. I still felt like dog crap the next day, but I decided to fight as hard as I could to live. The first night that I was able to sleep with mirtazapine, I decided to taper to get off it. I had been spending most of my time studying and implementing the free cbti online course the VA offers. I tapered from 15mg to 10mg and still slept good. You can imagine how happy I was. Then the next night I did not sleep at all. So I went back to 15mg and started researching how to get off this crap. I found Altostrata's article which led me to this site, and the instructions on the no harm 10% taper. With my mind only functioning at around 30% capacity, all this measuring and turning the medicine into liquid was quite overwhelming. But I bought my scale and pill cutter on Amazon, and understand exactly how to do the liquid when the time comes. As of today, November 22, 2022 I am down to 12.5mg and I am still sleeping good. Since I started the medicine, I have only not been sleepy 2 days. Today is one of those days, so I decided to do this intro. A few weeks ago this would not have been possible. For me the side effects of mirtazapine are truly awful. The brain fog, and fatigue are intense. This seems to improve a minuscule amount each day. A few weeks ago I was barely functional. Driving to the dentist was a monumental task. But now I can function a little better. I believe I could handle a crisis. But everything takes intense mental focus. My favorite thing in life was walking a 5 mile trail near my home. I made the full walk yesterday, but there was no pleasure. I can now watch a 30 minute sitcom, but a movie would be out of the question right now. I am very grateful for this website. The information is so vital. The sleep mask and garbage bags on the windows have made a huge difference. I sleep an extra hour because of it. The supplements are helping and must say the Lactium is extremely effective for me. I am holding it in reserve for the inevitable rebound insomnia. A few weeks ago, I was at the point where I did not see a light at the end of the tunnel, but I acknowledged the possibility that one might exist. Today, I see a flicker of light, and plan to fight with all my might to reach it. A funny/weird side story: I am a huge Carolina basketball fan, and a couple of weeks ago, I was thinking to myself, I wonder how Carolina did last year. I did remember Roy had retired and Hubert took over. I had completely forgotten that Carolina had a miraculous year, playing Duke in the final 4 and playing in a heart wrenching loss in the championship game. I'm not sure if this is due to the month of no sleep or the mirtazapine. And I had a hard time averaging numbers a few days ago, even thou I am a math wiz. My main focus right now is to get off the mirtazapine and still be able to sleep. If anyone knows how to deal with the intense fatigue and brain fog, I would love to know. Coffee does nothing for me anymore. The mirt seems to neutralize the effects of caffeine. How insidious! Many thanks to all the volunteers here, and all the advice. I will update as I continue my journey to get off mirtazapine.

Hi there, I have been through polydrug hell, suffered insomnia after medical shock then given host of sleep meds but believe they caused paradoxical breathing or possibly withdrawals maybe from mix, was given zolpiclone and Xanax and no in breath when going into deeper sleep and would wake constantly? Has anyone experienced this? Continued and given mirtrazapine at morning time! Then amitriptyline which caused urinary retention stopped both, no sleep still so kept on Xanax and zopiclone, then stopped and the same scenario no in breath? If anyone knows what this is? I was then given Xanax to keep me asleep, never more than 1mg ar night only, would you have withdrawals from that if just at night? Panic attacks as no sleep only an hour or so, myoclonus, can’t sleep during day time jerks hypnic. Then started sertraline and hyperacusis started and Xanax still. Then went to psych hospital as wasn’t sure what was happening? Was treated horrifically told agitated depression, never had depression in life, we thing misdiagnosed badly, by power tripping psych as I challenged that. Given Effexor, then clonazapam at night 1mg kept pushing Effexor up, no benefit. I was so worried as they were leaving me on clonazapam, I was only taking at night, day was cut cold Turkey as I was too sleepy. No weaning. Then told take more at night! But got trazadone added 100mg and cut clonazapam to .5 from 1mg, hyperacusis back as had gone but worse than when went in! Effexor pushed up more, phergen added night and clonazapam cut to .25mg from .5mg, Effexor up at 150mg, hyperacusis unbelievable now! Odd as if was depression should the Effexor now get rid of hyperacusis? No benefit. Then told take more, 187 and I couldn’t sleep at all. Myoclonus so bad. Was left even though had bruising everywhere ignored amongst so many other symptoms panic attacks so bad, let out as insurance up, left in lurch, cut to 150 Effexor then 112 and hyperacusis worsening. Got public psych but she said thinks misdiagnosed but no disgnosis and said cut Effexor to 75 and hyperacusis was too much to bear I had to go back to 112.5 mg. What is going on, I’ve never dealt with drugs like this before and don’t know what’s going on and very bad care here, told hyperacusis ENT thing but ruled out but ignored. Hypnic jerks, sleep not great at all, panic so bad in morning feel in total trauma ptsd all time freeze mode. Treated so badly. No info given on anything when in hospital just ignored and wouldn’t wean me off clonazapam yet told me Im on addictive meds now for life! Can anyone help me on hyperacusis and what’s going on breathing at night and hypnic jerks. Breathing is separate than jerks, no in breath in deeper sleep stage. I am at wits end and no life. Left without help. Clonazapam Now out of stock. I’m on it still what left .25mg trazadone and melatonin now might, wake up in horrors. Is it possibly to have withdrawals daily? If low dose? I’m so confused. Pharmacist said possible, my nervous system in total disarray. The 112 to 75 was too much. Too fast just cut fast. Any help on how to cut as tried opening beads out but even that hyperacusis was getting worse? Please help me make sense of this all? Thank you. Is it trauma PTSD, withdrawals, as I am worse now than ever, do get some sleep which is good thing. But wake in horrors. All day panic attacks constantly no let up unless lying down. BP all over place. Get so weak. Have thyroid condition and period issues, fibroid and lot of blood loss monthly. Skin is so dry. Diarrhea all time, gastro issues, reflux. In such panic I just need some advice what May be going on? Thanks so much

Hey everyone (I wish we were communicating under better circumstances), My name is Colin, and I recently turned 20 years old. My story starts about two years ago - It was the summer in between my senior year of high school and freshman year of college. As many of you probably know, this was in the middle of the pandemic, so depression and anxieties were already at an all time high. I had a lot of natural worries about my upcoming freshman year, as many of my classmates did too. I told my doctor about these worries, and she recommended that I see a psychiatrist, which I winded up doing. I was prescribed lexepro with the intention of getting up to 15mg. I remember right off the bat, I felt depersonalized, dizzy, forgetful, and had bad insomnia as well. I decided that to really give it a shot, I should try to push through the discomfort (worst mistake I've ever made in my entire life). After about four weeks, my mood lifted, but in a very unnatural and synthetic way. I still felt extremely depersonalized, had blurry vision, my memory was ****, I felt restless, and dissociated, and those are just a couple of the symptoms. I didn't care enough to try to get off at this point because my mood was "lifted" and I didn't think it was causing such extreme changes In my brain. I remember caring about very little during this time - I should also say that prior to starting the lexepro, I was struggling with alcohol addiction to deal with my anxiety. I was binge drinking roughly four nights a week, which was connected to an eating disorder I was dealing with as well, so most of the time I'd be drinking on an empty stomach. During these first four weeks, I was able to remain clean from alcohol while the lexepro was kicking In, but that didn't last long. Pretty soon after my mood "lifted", I was back to the same drinking and eating patterns. This went on through my freshman year at college, and the drinking only got worse, and I was blacking out more and more frequently, drinking more every day. It got up to a 6-10 beers a day, and by then I really didn't feel like myself at all. I remember all of those symptoms that I had in the beginning had gotten way way worse, and I could barely see myself in the mirror, hear my own voice, or feel my skin - I truly thought I was dying or going insane. It was around mid march of my freshman year, that I realized it might have to do with the drinking and ssri combination (or just the ssri). The final thing I experienced that told me I needed to leave school was when I stepped into the shower, and I couldn't feel the water on my skin (this is one of the scariest things I have ever experienced in my life.) I went home, and relapsed a few more times before realizing that I really needed to stop drinking - this was around mid may of last year, so pretty much exactly one year ago. This was also when I decided to begin my taper off of lexepro. Instantly, all of those symptoms got even more worse, and new ones like light sensitivity, floaters/staticy vision, and others that I don't fully remember emerged. I went into treatment, and continued my taper. I fully went off of lexepro at the beginning of July around 10 months ago. The severe depression came on first, and then about two months after I quit, my depression and now energy started to get really high. This was when the extreme insomnia and anxiety began. Since then my mood, anxiety, and a very long list of symptoms have been all over the place. I've found relief in gabapentin and low dose trazadone for the insomnia and anxiety, but those are starting to fade. Let me also just say that I've done tons of research on the trazadone, and until you reach a certain dose (150mg I believe) it has absolutely no antidepressant effect, that's what I have noticed as I've been taking it for awhile as well. (I was super paranoid about that in the beginning of taking it which is the only reason I'm mentioning it.) I'm definitely starting to feel a little bit more like myself, I can hear a little bit better, and see myself in the mirror a little more clearly. However, Im sure like many others on here, I'm still really scared that I've done permeant damage to my brain, and I'm worried that I'm never going to fully get back to my baseline. My skin numbness, and vision changes are still ever so present and so are many other symptoms that I can't even put into words. I'm just really looking for some hope, so if anyone has had a similar experience I'd love to hear it. And to those who are in a simalar boat but earlier on, **** truly is getting better, I'm just not on the other side, so I'm still not certain I'll ever make it back, but you won't be trapped in the darkest place forever. I'm so thankful I found this website. At times I was really close to giving up on my life - it's so good to know that I'm not alone.

I tried Citalopram for 2 weeks had terrible symptoms so stopped, was given buspirone stopped after a week then trazodone because i couldn’t sleep, stopped that after 5 days was horrible, now I can’t eat or sleep can barely function, that’s been 5 weeks since then

Hey everyone, I've wrestled with two crippling bouts of insomnia in my life, both within a year a half of each other. Both bouts of insomnia weren't driven by anxiety or depression, but rather came through illness. So, I don't ordinarily have depression or anxiety. The first time I had insomnia it lasted around 3 months and I got through it with temazepam and remeron, which I tapered off of successfully. The second bout of insomnia started December 8th, 2022, again due to illness. I started temazepam again and later remeron. I had some med changes over the course of several days, which is reflected in my signature, but eventually got back on remeron. My sleep eventually stabilized, so I tapered off the temazepam successfully, with the added help of hydroxyzine. I then stopped the hydroxyzine cold turkey and didn't seem to have any issues. The last thing to go was the remeron, which I always took at 10pm and went to bed at 10:30pm. I was on remeron for about 2.5 months, most of that time being on 15mg, which I then reduced to 7.5mg for a week, then 3.75mg for another week. During the remeron taper I also used 5-10mg of THC and 30mg of CBD at night and I only had one night I didn't sleep well. The last day I took the 3.75mg dose of remeron was March 2nd, 2023. So, I hopped off at 3.75mg and it's been two days and I haven't slept at all either night. I'm guessing I should go back on the 3.75mg dose and do a microtaper with a compounding pharmacy?

Hi all, I'm new and needing assistance. I was on antidepressants/stimulants for years and have managed to quit the stimulants, but am living through the hell of withdrawal from my SSRI, Zoloft after tapering too fast as you'll see below. This nightmare started in late May of 2020. I have some physical symptoms besides extreme fatigue, and the withdrawal itself is extreme anxiety, panic, depression, brain fog, confusion, poor memory... most of what is on the list of typical symptoms, and what I have come to understand is OCD. The crushing, breathless feeling of just having to get by minute to minute is like nothing I have ever experienced before. After reinstating Zoloft 12.5 mg in July, I seemed to stabilize a little bit after a few months, and withdrawal symptoms are just slightly better although the OCD is not budging. I need help/advice with moving forward with a taper. Right now I am not sure if I should wait a while and stabilize further since I just tried to stop the 12.5mg cold turkey less than two weeks ago and realized after 3 days it was a bad idea (although it did lead me to this site). I have been back on the 12.5mg Zoloft for a week. I was able to get liquid sertraline (Zoloft) from my doctor but I am unsure how to do the dosing. What I mean is, I recognize that I should reduce by 10% every 4 weeks, but I am unsure of how to dose this out from the liquid. I would really appreciate some help with this and advice on how long I should wait until trying to reduce.