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  1. Hi. I'm new here. Here are the basics of my story. I had been on 150mg of Zoloft for 17 years for dysthymia and generalized anxiety disorder. I decided to taper off, with the blessing of my pdoc. My depression and anxiety returned, and I had to not only increase the Zoloft to 200mg but add 1mg of Abilify (plus Konopin as needed). It's been a year and a half since the episode began and a year since starting Abilify. I'm feeling quite a bit better--I hardly ever take the Klonopin, and my pdoc said I can try doing without the Abilify. I just went 16 days at only 0.5mg of Abilify, but I'm feeling anxious and depressed again and bumped back up to 1mg. I'm so frustrated with the whole situation. I'm working hard to recover: I'm in weekly therapy, I run just about every day (3-6 miles), and I meditate almost daily. I don't want to come off the Zoloft, just the Abilify. Maybe I won't be able to, in which case I need to come to terms with that. Any comments or questions would be greatly appreciated.
  2. Dutchsarah

    Dutchsarah - Zoloft.

    Hi 🙂 I'm still figuring out how this site works and I hope I'm at the right place to introduce myself. After some very stressful family event I had some sort of nervous breakdown. I was put on celexa and took that for 3 days horrible reaction they switched me to Zoloft took that for 3 days, horrible reaction as well. Went to group therapy for 5 weeks and felt a bit better and was kind of able to function. Did genetic testing and found out I'm a poor metabolizer for most SSRI/SNRI about 2 months after I started have severe anxiety and intrusive thoughts, went back to Nurse Practitioner and she put me on a baby dose of Zoloft 12.5 mg and Klonopin as needed. (I took it maybe 10 times in total) I moved up to 25mg after 2 weeks but was tearful and had suicidal ideation the entire 5 weeks I was on zoloft. After 4 weeks my doc told me to taper for 4 days to 12.5 mg and then stop. I had heavy withdrawal right away. I'm off the drug for 6 weeks not and I'm still feeling terrible. Barely able to function, I'm not working for the moment (impossible) Suicidal thoughts (I'm not suicidal) insane anxiety, insomnia, derealization, restlessness. My withdrawal is getting a tiny bit better (i think) I'm really curious to hear if other people that have been on SSRI for such a short period of time (5 weeks) have had long withdrawal symptoms.
  3. Hi Everyone, My journey with Sertraline started at the ripe old age of 10-12 years old (I’m 31 now-my mom and I can’t seem to agree on when exactly I started taking meds). I was also on adderal or vyvanse at this age as well. In 2018 I decided I wanted to try to get off of meds. I started with the vyvanse. I went from 60mg to 50, and dropped 10mg a month until I was at nothing. Really didn’t experience any issues. Then I went to the Sertraline. I dropped from 200mg to 150mg and really only had a few brain zaps that went away after a few days. Six months later I dropped from 150mg to 100mg, again with only brain zaps and some irritability. During this time I moved to France to be with my husband (summer 2020 mid lockdown) and after 6 months there I decided I wanted to continue to go down because we knew in the next year or so we wanted to try for a baby. I had read a few forums so decided to take it a little slower this time. 100mg to 87.5mg. For the first time I experienced a decent amount of withdrawal symptoms. Mostly flu like, palpitations, but nothing I couldn’t get thru. After two weeks they dissipated. I then went directly from 87.5 to 75mg. Same thing with this cut but after a couple weeks, mostly dissipated with the exception of extreme anxiety and random weird intense pains throughout my body. Fast forward to a month later and all hell broke loose. The worst panic of my life (never suffered from panic attacks before besides ONE in late 2020 after moving) horrible horrible DP/DR (mostly DR) to the point that I really thought I was going crazy. I would begin each morning with a good barf and have diarrhea throughout the days. I ended up losing about 12lbs in a few weeks. No appetite. Everything made me feel weird and I cried nonstop. My doctor told me to take a low dose of Xanax three times a day for two weeks and honestly it helped. I stopped the Xanax after three weeks (I decided to continue a little longer) with no issues. Or no immediate issues that I know of. About five months after this in mid 2021 I decided to do a SLOW taper, 2.5-5% every two weeks. I ended up stopping around the 61mg mark because my panic was getting so bad, I had an EIGHT WEEK MIGRAINE and I just couldn’t keep it together. At this point I also had my first intro to inner restlessness, or mild akathisia, located in my chest and under my armpits. This only lasted about a week but really freaked me out. After two and a half months of staying at 61mg I decided to continue to go down, this time no more than 2.5% decreases. It seemed to go ok at this rate. I was still suffering from bad OCD and anxiety but there were no physical symptoms. My last cut was when we moved back to California in Feb 2022, a few months ago. I experienced another bout of weeklong mild inner restlessness at this point but again I ignored it and it went away. Had two weeks of dizziness but was told it was a vestibular migraine. I ended up spot taking bromazepam at a low dose for a couple of weeks because it helped suppress the dizziness. Now two weeks ago, Late April 2022, I was sitting at my desk at work and like a switch I felt the internal restlessness start again. This time more intense than before. It continued at the same intensity and ramped up this weekend. I have such a ball of energy/tickling in my chest and throat that I start each morning dry heaving. I have no appetite. Lost 5lbs in 3 days. This weekend I’ve also had full body tremors and complete panic crying spells and dread because of it and my fear of akathisia being permanent. I don’t know if this had something to do with the bromazepam, late hitting withdrawals from earlier extreme cuts, huge life stressor of moving countries, new job which is very stressful or what. I feel like my CNS is shot and I don’t know what to do. I have to function and work to help provide for my family, being disabled in bed is just not an option but it’s where I’m at today. I caved and took a bromazepam because it calms the akathisia and I couldn’t just lay in bed and roll around in a panic any longer. I really need some help.
  4. Hello everyone , Thank you for this website and forum. I can't believe I have only recently found you,(since viewing the Four Corners show in ABC TV in Australia. I shed many tears watching the show. I was started on 25 mg sertraline by a young GP back in 2006 after I was burnt out from a stressful job (and a prior 4 years full time study to be a naturopath), subsequently had lost some purpose/direction in life. I was not diagnosed with a mental health condition just given a referral to a psychologist. I did start to feel a little better, then she said to go to 50mg. Went along like this for maybe 12 months, they put me up to 100mg (can't remember why). No big crises, maybe I was still burnt out. It did give me a bit more energy and I felt more confident and I seemed to be able to do more. It took away my bodies internal barometer I always thought. I am by nature an introvert with less energy. Or more passive energy I could say. I felt very ashamed that I had to take such a drug, given I was a naturopath. Alongside my drug, I ate well, exercised, took herbs and some vitamins/minerals, etc etc. I tried twice to come off in those early days (say 18months post starting), however got a few days in to 0mg and restarted with an instant relief from symptoms (brain zaps, irritability, worry). Jump ahead to 2019 and I reduced (25mg drops) from 100mg to 25mg over a few months. Started to get irritable , brain zaps, not feeling myself, so went back to 50mg with all settled again within a few days. I was so un happy about being on the drug for so long I wanted to have another attempt, more slowly this time with the help of another experienced naturopath/herbalist. I started reducing from 100mg then to 75mg, no symptoms of withdrawal. Then 2 months later I went down to 50mg, still smooth sailing with no symptoms. A few months later I went down to 25mg (i thought this was slowly!!) and this is when some symptoms started. Brain zaps, crying, sleep not so good. At this time I also had three major life stressors happen (financial, relationship, aged parents). I thought I was having an extended grief period. About 6 months on 25mg I suddenly had a week where I felt good for the entire week or so. So I thought I would go to 0mg! Here the trouble started. I cried for days in a row, which felt like an out pouring of years of not being able to cry or grieve "properly" while on sertraline. I continued to cry frequently. I kept pushing on. Brain zaps which finally stopped after 2 months. The neuro emotions were becoming worse, however. A black cloud would descend over me which were a frightening blend of fear, disconnection, anxiety, depression, doom, fear of dying, fear my animals would die. I had a day of violent nausea and gut cramping and crying at about 4 months on 0mg. Appetite had been waning for awhile. Sleep more disturbed. End of February 2023 I had to arrange for my old horse and goat to put to sleep. Leading up to this I had shocking anxiety and fear. I had an episode of panic/anxiety/fear that lasted 12 hours non stop. I couldn't stop the thoughts, chest pain, gut pain, numb lips. I couldn;t function until it stopped the next morning. 1 or 2 weeks later after the vet had been to euthanise my animals I had a worse episode (12 hours after starting back on 25mg sertarline)where I felt the needed to call ambulance. I went to emergency (they thought I was having a heart attack on my journey, so did several ECG's en route ) they kept me in for a few hours , I settled so they let me go home. I had to arrange someone to come and help me at home as I couldn't function to look after myself and my animals. They gave me 2.5mg on valium in hospital which settled me for a an hour and yet again I was back into extreme inner restlessness , where I wanted to die as I felt so dreadful as if I was coming off some illegal highly addictive drug. Luckily I wasn't shipped off to a psych unit, although I did feel I was having a "nervous breakdown'. It was living hell and I thought I was going mad. I have never in my life experienced such horror. I still had no idea it was protracted withdrawal. Other symptoms were diarrhoea, low sodium, weakness, nausea, early morning waking with panic/dread, anxiety, agitation, disconnected. It took my weeks/months to stabilise. I had sensitised myself to the sertraline. After taking each dose in the morning I would get worse anxiety, heart palpitations/pain, polyuria and other things I forget now. Brain way too active at night, sleep still bad. They wanted back to 100mg more quickly than I new I could tolerate, so I did my own thing and took longer between 25mg increases. Back to 100mg for a month or so. Felt too stimulated, so I went back to 75mg. No symptoms of withdrawal. During this very traumatic time I took maybe 12 doses of 5mg valium. I was so measured with it as I knew it would make things more complicated. I hated taking it except for the first few doses when it was the only thing that gave me a break from the relentless mental torture. Emotions/mood fairly stable on 75mg, found this group, plan is to taper (as per your guidelines) starting in a month or two. Plan to make my own liquid as compounding pharmacist too expensive here in Australia. Sorry for my long story!! Thanks for all your supportive posts I have been reading and other helpful information. I feel being on this drug so long, it has affected my unconscious mind and my psycho spirituality. I am grateful I am still alive and have not suffered as much as some of you have. I feel for you. Thanks for reading if you made it to the end.
  5. Hello there. I am a totally blind, partially deaf, autistic man aged 47 with childhood and recent Trauma I have experienced frequent gaslighting, and extreme mental bullying over the years. I left school at the end of 1994, and lived with my parents until I was 42 years old. Just before turning 21, I had reached a stage, where I had been on no medication for 6 years after coming off beta blockers in 1991. Well 1997 came along, and we were in the middle of a long lasting heatwave, which didn't help. I was even doing regular workouts at the Gym. I suddenly started developing this irrational fear of the unknown and became very clingy, bombarded with negative thoughts, such as people close to me dying, time accelerating, wishing I could go back to when I was little and things were more sure and safe, feeling like things were unstable and out of control ETC. The feelings became worse over the next month or so, and my local doctor put me on Diazepam, with instructions to take it at night, but not to take it for more than 2 weeks. He referred me to a psychologist, who I thought was a godsend.... at first. After a month of talk therapy, he put me on 50 mg of Zoloft. The first day I took it, it gave me insomnia and I developed tremors in my arms and legs for a couple of days. I could feel my brain being rewired, and I began to feel better by the second or 3rd week, and i also started to sleep better. Fast forward to 6 months later and the shrink tells me I can stop taking it, this is around October of 1997, he said nothing about tapering off. Well, within 3 months, come mid January 1998, I began to get the jitters again and before I knew it, I'd hit rock bottom. I was put back on Zoloft again, 50MG, but was told to stay on it for 12 months. New year's eve arrives, and I stop the medication as per his instructions, and wouldn't you know it? there came another relapse. I crashed hard, and my parents could only watch as I became a quivering, crying mess, so I saw the shrink for the last time, and he told me to get back on it, but the dosage had to be increased to 75mg, because it had stopped working at the old dosage. I was extremely angry that he had put me through 2 relapses, I felt like a lab rat that had been experimented on! 24 years later, I've now started learning about natural treatments such as herbs and vitamins and nutrition and am all too aware of the powers that be wanting us to stay sick and addicted to their poisonous chemicals, I am still, however, stuck on my 75MG regimen and I am too scared to even begin a slow withdrawal after what happened last time. If I want to taper off, I will have to do it over a period of years. I would like to take some pointers on here as to how I should go about it. I'm thinking of alternating between one day on 75MG and one day on 50mg for a month, then 2 days on 50mg for a month, then 3 days, 4 days, ETC, until I am back taking my old dose of 50mg. Then slowly work my way down to 25 MG, and eventually nothing. Do you think that would work?
  6. Hi My name is trina I was CT off two medications 11 months ago. Wellbutrin 300 mg and Zoloft 25 mg I am totally buggered up. Severe withdrawals most of the time. Crazy psychiatrist, thinks I have medical problems Is there anything I can take to help? Will restarting these drugs again help? My friends keep telling me to restart them but it they caused this much sickness why would I want to take them. One know it all friend said I would feel better. Like how would he know? Any help would be great I know this is not medical advice, just asking other sufferers Thanks Trina
  7. Hello, I'm glad I came across this forum because since I started having withdrawals after quitting Zoloft I've been looking for information about people who have been on the drug for more than a few months, all I can find are studies about people who withdrawal after a short trial period. I'll try to keep this as short as possible because I probably don't need to regurgitate my whole life story into this text box here but I'm also procrastinating homework right now so maybe I will do a bit of that... (TW: mention of suicidal ideation) I've struggled with anxiety for as long as I can recall. I had severe OCD as a child along with what I was eventually told was generalized anxiety disorder and panic disorder. I silently suffered for years until at 15 I realized I didn't think I could go on living if nothing changed so I told my parents and then one day I was sitting across from a psychiatrist prescribing me my first bottle of Zoloft. At that time for whatever reason, Zoloft was the change I needed and within about 6 months I was living in a way I wouldn't have conceived as possible beforehand because of how free and happy I felt. I had never experienced life without crippling anxiety and the depression that came with it. I thought of Zoloft as magic, I was soo thankful that I was on it. It enabled me to live a pretty normal high school life without having panic attacks in the bathroom every morning and constantly being afraid that my body was racked with parasites (a long term obsession and fear of mine). I never thought I would be able to leave home for college either, and I attributed that success to Zoloft as well. I had been on 150mg comfortably for years and eventually I decided I wanted to come off of them. I made it down to 50mg over time before the pandemic hit. Then at some point my life deteriorated rather quickly. I started have horrible panic attacks again, I sunk into the worst depression of my life, was severely derealized, I could barely eat, and I was utterly terrified because at that time I felt that there was no part of me left that wanted to keep living if I didn't feel better. Thinking that this was all attributed to my medication changes, my doctor increased my dose back to where I was before. Unexpectedly, for me, there was no change. On top of this, I felt the Zoloft was giving me side effects that it had not before, like constant lightheadedness. I kept waiting for the Zoloft to kick in and do its same magic, but it never did. Instead I started going to therapy, changing my lifestyle, mediating, etc. (Very fortunate to have access to these things and a support system). Pulling myself out of that hole was one of the most difficult things I've ever had to do, and I didn't think I would ever feel better. But over the course of a year, I've felt progressively better and more myself again, all the while I'd been decreasing my Zoloft very slowly and for the last two months I've been at 25mg. I am certainly not anxiety free, but I feel more confident in my ability to cope with it than I ever have. I am also confident that Zoloft does absolutely nothing for me anymore. I had always been told by my old psychiatrist that I would be easily able to come off of it whenever I pleased. Once I was down to 25mg, I thought that was basically nothing so I wouldn't even notice a change when I stopped taking it. So one night I figured I'd been tapering long enough and I stopped taking pills. I knew withdrawal was possible but I figured I'm tough I can handle a couple of days of feeling weird. So here I am now, coming to this realization that Zoloft is not in fact a drug that will just leave your system without having any sort of impact...yeah... I feel incredibly lost and scared right now because I can't decide if I should try to push through a couple weeks because so far the withdrawal hasn't been horrible, but it is uncomfortable. I'm very lightheaded, nauseous, can't stop crying and am having wild mood swings like I've never experienced and its only been a few days. I'm thinking what if I go back on them and all I would have needed to do was go through a few more days? But the thing is there's no way to know how long I'll be feeling like this. And based on what I am reading, for someone who's been on them for so long, my brain may need a while to reboot the systems and make new receptors and figure out how much serotonin to make after years. My main problem is that I'm a college student, I can't afford to stop doing school for however long this takes. I can barely think or comprehend what I read and I'm terrified that my grades are going to start suffering for it. But if I go back on, I'll be disappointed in myself. I feel trapped because I don't even need this medication anymore for its intended purpose, but now I need it to have brain function? I've wanted to be free from it for so long, and I'm coming to the realization that I might not be able to do this right now, in this way. I feel almost betrayed by this drug I used to consider my savior. I feel betrayed by my doctor that told my mom when she asked him if it would make any long term changes to my brain chemistry, he told her "no, it will not." I don't know if I should go back on it and try a longer, smaller taper, or if I should try to push through (which is what people who have never taken antidepressants keep telling me to do of course). I'm also scared now that the longer I'm on it, the more difficult it will be to get off of it in the future. I had no idea that I would have to deal with this, and it seems that there is very limited literature on the subject. At this point I don't know what my next move is, I'm so determined to get off of it, but I also need to be a functional person right now. I don't know if these things are mutually exclusive.
  8. I have been successfully tapering off of 50mg Zoloft for 6 months now. Managed to go down by 20% every couple of months without side-effects and am now down to 20.5 mg. However, this is the second time now I have tried to go down to my next step 16.4 and both times I've had to go back up because of the side-effects. I seem to have gotten stuck; I've been on the 20.5 dose twice as long as any previous level. Has anyone else experienced this? Do I just need to wait longer, do I need to try going down a smaller percentage?
  9. Hello, first, I want to emphasize that English is not my native language. A brief overview of my medical history: Since the age of 21, I have had depressive episodes treated with Seroxat and Zoloft. Between these episodes, several years could pass. I easily stopped taking the antidepressants, even though I didn't gradually reduce the doses. Due to mild depression, in September 2021, I asked my psychiatrist to prescribe me an antidepressant again. After just two weeks, I felt better, my energy returned, and the depressive thoughts disappeared. I wasn't aware that the antidepressant had actually triggered hypomania. In March 2023, I stopped taking the antidepressant again. In May, the depression returned with full force. I went back to the psychiatrist and told them about the hypomania. She prescribed Zoloft (50mg), lamotrigine (50mg), and olanzapine (5mg) for sleep, even though I didn't have sleep problems at that time. My condition didn't improve; in fact, I felt like I had lost myself, my emotions, and the will to live. I also experienced a rapid heart rate. The diagnosis of bipolar 2 was not confirmed. My psychiatrist even claims that I don't have bipolar disorder. I suspect that olanzapine is the main "culprit," which is why I tried to stop taking it CT. Immediately, insomnia appeared, and I had to restart taking it. That's when I started researching how to safely taper off this drug and found this website. Since September, I have been gradually reducing the dose of the medication every 3 weeks. At first, it was more than 10%, so now I'm at a dose of 1.125mg since January 10th. I usually notice withdrawal symptoms after about 6-7 days. Initially, I had nausea, diarrhea, difficulty sleeping, anhedonia, and depression. The nausea and diarrhea are now tolerable, and I think kefir has helped me the most. My sleep is between 4 and 8 hours. It's hard for me that my emotions have dulled. For a while, I couldn't even cry. I have managed to do so twice in the meantime. As contradictory as it may sound, I was happy that I could cry. I live in constant fear of how intense the withdrawal symptoms will be. On this difficult path of getting off olanzapine, I would like to hear about experiences. With a reduction in dose, under the condition that the dose is reduced by 10% from the last dose, do the symptoms become milder? Will my emotions at least return a little during the reduction? Will I be a little happier? Is it possible that Zoloft is not working because I'm taking olanzapine? Regarding a potential bipolar disorder, I am going through real agony. I constantly question the last 27 years - have I ever been hypomanic without realizing it? Was the hypomania caused by Seroxat really bipolar disorder? Will I have to take medication for the rest of my life? I have lost trust in psychiatrists. I feel lonely, ashamed, and I'm not even able to talk to my husband, sister, or mom about what I'm currently going through. My husband doesn't even know how olanzapine affects me or that I'm trying to get off it. By the way, as I write this, I'm crying, which I suppose is good. I wonder what I have done so wrong to go through what I'm going now and if I will ever be the way I used to be.
  10. Hi, I'm currently 4 months off sertraline 200mg and elvanse 70mg. I'm currently struggling with brain pressure and cognitive problems. I can't complete simple tasks and struggle with my speech. It gets worse everytime I have this head pressure. I've read a few posts about people having similar symptoms but I want to know if anyone has recovered from these symptoms if you did how long was it until you improved. Thanks
  11. Hi, I’m new here. 👋 I’m surprised of having such strong withdrawal symptoms going down just 1% from 57,5 mg to 57 mg of Zoloft, starting yesterday. High anxiety, agitation and headache. Could stopping Lamictal 4 weeks ago affect the Zoloft withdrawal (I only took 25 mg of Lamictal for 19 days)? I’ve been on Zoloft for more than 20 years. I made a MRI and it showed I’ve had minor strokes effecting parts of the prefrontal cortex which my psychiatrist says can explain my sensitivity. Any thoughts are welcomed!
  12. Hey guys, I'm just going to create a topic about myself, my current situation and my experience with antidepressants/benzos as well as ask for some advice for what to do next. This is going to be a full picture. Lorazepam = Ativan Sertraline = Zoloft I'm a 22 year old. Starting the 19th November - I caught respiratory infection due to being extremely stressed and highly anxious (never before seen in my life, literally pulling my hair out from irrational worries) Starting the 26th November - I started to get headaches and nausea, most likely due to this stress. On the 1st December - stress ended, but the nausea and loss of appetite with the headaches persisted. 20th December - I started to take a beta blocker for stress due to paranoia about the headaches (thinking it could be a tumour due to the continued headaches with loss of appetite) 23rd December - I was prescribed Sertraline to help with the stress and freaking out about the headaches and health issues. I took one pill, where I noticed my pupils went completely dilated for the next week. I didn't continue the drug after that one pill as it gave me insomnia. It may be worth considering serotonin syndrome? Around the 23rd December - I started to get a numbness squeezing/bandlike pain in my foot that climbed all the way up to the top of my leg over the next few days, my current hypothesis that this was either, stress, the beta blocker, or starting the sertraline that caused this. 25/26/27 December - I went to Accident and Emergency, where the Doctors thought I could have MS and didn't consider ask about current drugs. This sent me into a big spiral as I worried a lot about this. Around this time my headaches, nausea and loss of appetite stopped. 27th December - I started Lorazepam (2mg) 31st December - Started up Sertraline 50mg at the advice of the doctors to help with my stress. My head MRI came back fine, all normal (So not MS). 5th January - Muscle cramps, and widespread pain with bandlike sensations in legs and arms. 14th January - 3mg Lorazepam with and increase to 100mg advised by my doctor. 19th January - Tapered off lorazepam and started to notice stiffness in back, legs and wrists. 26th January - completed off lorazepam. 1st February - Reduction of symptoms around this time, except obvious lorazepam withdrawal of shaking and sweating. The only other symptom that persisted was very tight calves. 2nd February - Reduced to 50mg of Sertraline. 6th February - Started to get a whole host of symptoms -Burning Legs and lower spine, muscle spasms, vibrating left eye, nausea, diarrhoea, dark stools, less appetite, insomnia, numbness/tightness in limbs, vertigo, enhanced smell - (I could smell empty wine glass from the other side of the room, slight instability. 10th February - Reduction to 25mg Sertraline. 14th February - Saw a neurologist who told me the sertraline had nothing to do with this since I was on such a low dose, but also said everything seemed fine from an neurological assessment (I could walk fine, I could feel everything he done). Thus, he told me to stop taking the Sertraline completely. ( I now see this as a big mistake.) Present day (3rd March) - Many of those symptoms have gone, although currently persisting: Much rarer burning (less than before), muscle spasms (less than before), slight instability, nausea, tight bandlike sensations in legs and arms, hyper sensitivity to cold (causes pain if something too cold touches me, almost like my nerves are hyper sensitive to everything. I did start to have really bad physical ticks for a week after stopping the sertraline completely, but they seem to have stopped completely now. I also got brain zaps, but that seems to be very rare now. I was thinking about going back on the Sertraline to help with the burning sensations and muscle pains (and other symptoms.) It's interesting to note that these were also the same symptoms I had first coming on/ upping my sertraline dose. Does anyone have any advice whether it would be best to: A.) Wait out the withdrawal, and if so, how long until I'm back to normal again? Will these symptoms eventually go? The muscle tight band pain is definitely the worst effect I have. B.) Reinstate at a low dose. If so, how low a dose should I reinstate back at? How long should I stay on that dose for before dropping the dose? How much should I drop the dose? I also wonder if some of these effects could be lorazepam protracted withdrawal coinciding with the sertraline side effects/withdrawal. It seems the lorazepam could have been masking some of the side effects I may have had from the sertraline. Thank you for reading, any advice would be much appreciated. I'll be sure to return the favour once I'm well and help others suffering from withdrawal and antidepressant mis-advice from doctors.
  13. Hi there, so I'm not new to Zoloft, been taking 50 mg (1 pill) for 10 years from age 17-27. I'm 42 now. I don't really remember how I tapered back then, as far as I remember one day I realized that I do not need it anymore and gradually within months I decreased by a quarter pill, the stopped with no issues. I can't remember if I stopped from a quarter pill (12,5 mg) or went down to 1/8 pill (6,25 mg), but probably from a quarter pill. I had a few brain zaps maybe the first few days, but that's all I remember. I was not new to brain zaps, if I did not take my daily dose on time in the morning, I also got them. Originally I started taking it for social integration issues and mild ticks. I was absolutely drug free for 15 years, had no anxiety or depression issues. I also have an active social life, although being an introverted type I tend to have fewer friends but they are really close. I also have a daily and really good connection with my family. I have to admit, I live a stress free life, no job for 6 years, no girlfriend for 8 years. I know it's not normal, but I was okay with it and it might have been only because I'm really lazy. When I had a job I was working at a multinational company and was quite successful, promoted twice within 3 years but I did not find myself comfortable in the last position, got mild anxiety and ticks again and quit. Never really found the balance between work and life. So in the last 15 years I was perfectly fine, no anxiety or depression, except a little bit when I left my job. I admit, my life is far from perfect, but I was okay with it. I did the El Camino pilgrimage this year the second time, the first time I did was a big milestone in my life, I changed job after that and lost a lot of weight, I was really obese. This year I had the same aim, to lose weight (got obese again) & and to change my lifestyle and find a new job. This year I was really unlucky and got Covid after two weeks on the El Camino, rested a week but was able to continue and successfully finished it. Back home, I had a really good friendship for 4 years with one of my neighbour. She is much older than me. She has a lovely personality, the always happy type. We were kinda soulmates since his husband died 4 years ago, that's when I got to know her. We were really close, was always able to talk about anything and we talked & met every day. On the Camino I thought a lot about, why not extend our friendship a little bit with some extra benefits. I know we never thought of each other like that, but I know she likes me a lot, me too, so shy not. At first she refused my approach, I got her too sudden. I asked for a few weeks break so I can process the refusal which she took very heavily. I promised that we will not lose each other, I just need a little time. After 3 weeks (in which she wrote me every day, even though I asked her to give me time), I contacted her again and everything seemed to be normal, soulmates again. I just needed time to process the refusal, but did not have anxiety or anything like that. But as we became friends again (was really strange at the first few times), we started talking a lot again and we both fell in love with each other. Unexpected twist, ha? Unfortunately we both talked about our past and she did a little bit too much. As it turned out, she had quite a colourful sex life when she was young and she shared too much details. I probably have a mild retroactive jealousy OCD, because of a childhood trauma when my father almost left my mother for another woman & also because of my own similar trauma at age 25 when it turned out that the girl who I thought was the love my life slept with half of my friends. She defended that "we were on a break" at the times and now she only wants me, but I was never able to forgive her and broke up after a year or so. So back to the present. Probably all together because my convenient lifestyle seemed to change drastically, the fear if our new romantic connection will ruin our soulmate thing with my neighbour, the burden that we can't act as a couple as she is much older than me, and she telling too much about her past got me a nice breakdown. I only experienced a breakdown like this, when I got to know slowly about my ex love of my life missteps. That only lasted for 2 weeks, at the time I was still on Zoloft though. This time I was almost not able to eat for 2-3 days and had really high anxiety. I went to a psychiatrist who put me on 3 x 0,25 mg Xanax. That corrected me in about a week, but we had a few jealousy fights which always set me back to high anxiety. Very interestingly, usually only the mornings were really bad, by the evening I was the loving guy I wanted to be. But the jealousy fights always set me back really hard. At the same time I was really angry with myself, as the stories she told me was like 20-30 years ago, they still bothered me. Now I know that this is a kind of OCD, best treated with ERP and I probably will be able to get through it. It was just these stories were new to me, also probably mixed with a little Madonna-***** complex. I was able to guess that she likes sex (that's why I tried her the first time), so that was not a surprise for me, but hearing some exact stories was still too much. On my last setback to anxiety I go so desperate, that I decided to start Zoloft again. I started with only half a pill (25 mg) and took it for 11 days. From the 3rd to 9th day I felt like salad/zombie. I had diarrhea and felt like I'm out of my body. Had insomnia, woke up like 4-5 times & night sweats. I also reacted really harsh to any emotions. I did not leave my flat and only felt apathy. I think this was the time when my soulmate realized that I have a real problem. By the 11th day my side effects kinda faded, but I also felt totally emotionally numb and & light depression, apathy. This was on Christmas day, I just had the strength to visit my family. Retroactive jealousy also disappeared, but also the love. I felt nothing. This is when I decided that this is not for me. I'm a very emotional person with high empathy, I don't want to lose it. Also this is when I found your page and decided that antidepressants are just not worth it. The next five days I took only a quarter pill, then stopped. After the dose reduction I got mild anxiety the first 3 days, then nothing. Still in apathy though, almost no kraft to do anything during the day. Now I'm on my 6th day of not taking Zoloft and it seems something started. I got stomach ache, mild anxiety and still in apathy. I'm still taking the 3 x 0,25 mg Xanax (2 months now), will taper that only after everything okay with Zoloft. And of course I will taper much slower than Zoloft, although I hope 2-3 months is not a long time & my dose is really low. I took the Zoloft tapering advice from Adele Framer: https://www.quora.com/I-have-stopped-taking-50mg-of-sertraline-after-10-days-will-I-get-any-withdrawal-symptoms Sorry if this got a little long, it felt good to write it down. My family knows about my 'drug' situation and they are supportive but I did not tell them about my new romantic relationship. She is also supportive, but does not really understand what I'm going through. She just wants back my old myself, but understands I need time. Got a few questions: 1, What are the chances that the stomach ache, mild anxiety & apathy are Zoloft withdrawal effects? Although I had apathy since I started it. I took Zoloft for 16 days altogether, 11 days half pill, 5 days quarter pill. This is my 6th day of not taking it at all, so 5 half life times past. I want to avoid reinstating Zoloft at all cost. 2, What are the chances that when I started Zoloft, from the 3rd to 9th day feeling like a zombie/salad was an Adverse Reaction? Do we have an estimate around how many ppl are affected by this in percentage? Although, I took Zoloft before, that was a long time ago, my body is older now. 3, If you have any other insight or advice on my situation, I would be grateful.
  14. It’s time for me to write this. I’ve wanted to write it for a while and have often come close in the last few months, only to be hit with another short 1-2 day long wave. It’s been 2.5 years since I took my last dose of Sertraline and I am happy to say that after 2 years of horrible insomnia and the plethora of other physical and emotional WD symptoms we have to endure, I’ve slept well for 3 months straight and aside from minor tremors, tingling hands and what I can only describe as moderate nerve pain in my head 1 hour before bed and 1 hour after waking I feel pretty normal. I smile, I laugh, I cry. I enjoy the moment instead of living in an anxious world wondering if I will ever feel normal again. My story starts in early 2016. After a normal and happy life, I had a number of significant life challenges thrown at me in a very short period. I became anxious about my health and issues in work and sleep started to elude me. Eventually I became anxious about my sleep and we all know that makes sleep worse. Somehow I managed to keep going for 6 months on virtually no sleep before I blew a fuse and ended up off work, in bed with a prescription for Zoloft/Sertraline. I still remember my first dose. It made me feel much worse and made me not sleep at all. I was back at the doctor 2 or 3 times saying that this couldn’t be right and wondering if I’d ever sleep again. After about a month, the side effects subsided and sleep resumed, though I still felt very tired all the time and would often need a time out during the day and in the evening I would just curl up in a chair as talking to people, even my family, was too much for me. This went on for 2 years with some, but limited improvement. I was really questioning why I still felt so tired? Was it the Sertraline, was it that I was still in the job which had been part of the cause of my condition or had not sleeping for so long damaged my brain permanently? I had to do something and the smartest place to start seemed to be to stop the Sertraline. I didn’t like feeling reliant on a drug anyway and 2 years had passed and my sleep was good. At the time I was on 25mg and had been for several months. My GP said at that small of a dose it probably wasn’t doing anything anyway and was just a placebo and that I could just stop taking it. I ended up splitting tablets with my nails ‘roughly’ into quarters and had a couple of weeks at 12.5mg, then went to zero on November 1st 2018, so that I would be over the alleged 2 weeks ‘self limiting’ withdrawal effects well before Christmas. I remember immediately feeling sharper. The emotional numbing effect of the drug had gone and I felt great for a week. Perhaps this was my new beginning. Then about 1 week after stopping I had my first brain zap. I remember it well. I was driving and I felt something building in my head, right in the middle of my brain. The jolt was so strong I remember it to this day. It scared me. I didn’t know at the time but I was to have brain zaps, ripples & electric waves in my head for almost 2 years. My WD symptoms got worse over the first year. First was the insomnia. I hated that that had returned and considered going back on the Sertraline, but I chose to persevere. Then the nausea and fatigue got worse. I was excusing myself from social events and having tactical timeouts in advance of important events. My work suffered and I started being managed out of my job. What was going on? It was about this time that my wife discovered this website and I started reading stories and realised what was happening. I searched the recovery stories to figure out if I would recover and how long it would take. I’m sure we all have done that. My initial hope was 12-18 months. At 9 months post zero I left my job. For a month I felt reasonably OK but at 10 months I started feeling worse and worse. By month 12 I was bedridden, sweating, nauseous and emotionally very low. I’d get 1-5 day windows but waves lasted weeks. The worst one was around 10 weeks long at around 15 months post zero. I’d say my symptoms changed over time. Initially they were fatigue and nausea, this moved to sweating and tingling, then emotional with many flashbacks and much self-criticism and finally more nervous with tremors, shakes and voice loss. Tinnitus and Insomnia were present throughout, especially waking in the middle of the night for 2-3 hours. At 18 months things started to improve. My wife saw me laugh for the first time in ages, my kids said I was better company, I remember being able to cry again, I stopped being so self-absorbed and started being interested in others and the surroundings. At 2 years I started working again. That was tough, but over 3 months I got back to being able to work a full week. At 27 months I stopped taking Sleep aids and I’ve now gone over 100 days with good sleep. It’s now 30 months and the only thing I get is the odd tremor and head pain an hour before bed and an hour after waking. I can manage that and know it goes in an hour or so, though I suspect it may be a while. My tips are the same as everyone else’s: Be kind to yourself Accept your situation, stop looking for answers There’s no magic cure with diet, supplements or re-instatement Walk a lot Appreciate those who support you Finally a big thank you to all those who have provided help to me through chats on this forum or privately, to the administrators and to Alto for creating this forum back in the day. I wish you all patience and success in your WD journeys. ADMIN NOTE DaBro's Introductions topic is here: ?>
  15. Hi everyone, I am new here and I am desperate to get well. I was on Prozac for 10 years and stoped very easy. Three months I was feeling great but some major changes in my life made me hit rock bottom in March 2021 and was put back on Prozac 40 mg and klonopin 1.25mg. I decided to stop after one month and went into insanity, emergency rooms and but back on Lexapro 5mg to 10 mg and klonopin .25mg as needed and then decided to stop again after one month. I ended up with the worst panic attack from withdrawals and shaking,not eating, lost 15 pounds and ended up in hospital. They kept me 12 days on Paxil 40mg and Quietapine for sleep and 1mg Ativan. Was feeling great and came home just to start all over and ended up in the hospital again. I was put on 100mg Zoloft, 300x 2 a day Depakote,1.5mg Ativan and 15mg Mirzaten I was great for a month and I reduced myself the dosage to no benzodiazepines, no Depakote, 25mg Sertraline and 7.5 Mirzaten. I took 0.1mg clonidine to regulate my blood pressure for three weeks. I am finished, I am bed ridden, crying, surge of adrenaline, shaking. I am taking 0.5mg Ativan and I am calm till I go to sleep. Every morning I am waking up with anxiety. I am at the end of my ropez I am planing to go to a psychiatrist tomorrow and see what I can do to stabilize. How can I get off the 7mg mirzaten I am now without feeling this mess. I cannot keep a job now. I took my 20 years old son from Canada and moved at my parents in Romania and we suffer here because we cannot adapt. My son will leave in couple weeks back to Toronto but I am not able to go in this state of mind. I am unstable. Help!
  16. Hi all, I’m Corn, 30 yo woman, located in Austin, TX. After a few months of just reading, finally joined & taking a tentative step into the world of slow tapering. I’ve been on sertraline 50mg since 2015, put on it while I was in college and suffering from severe depression made worse by the Chicago winter. It did save my life, and I think it was definitely the best choice in the moment. Fast forward to June 2023 - after going through a year of intensive therapy where I tackled a lot of my childhood trauma, PTSD from a recent loss, and taking better control of my life, I decided to go off of medication. I decided this because I was feeling overall better & more hopeful about my life, and this meant that I noticed more of the emotional blunting effects of sertraline. I “tapered” (according to the recommendation of my psychiatrist), from 50-> 25mg per month, and then completely off. Well, you can probably guess what happened from that. About two months after I was on 0mg of zoloft, I started becoming increasingly anxious, severely restless, waking up with my heart pounding, crying spells, hyperviligence, irritation, and severe lack of focus. This worsened over the weeks following, where I was not able to sleep properly, and could not sit still or do any activity required for life. Of course, my psychiatrist did not believe that I was going through withdrawal. I’m currently on a medical leave from work, and have reinstated my sertraline, slowly going up from 12.5mg to 25, to 50mg over the span of a few weeks. I’m definitely starting to feel more normal, less anxious, etc. But the emotional blunting is also obvious. During my period of withdrawal hell, I searched all of the internet for stories like mine, and found SA. I read through the scientific papers, especially of Horowitz, and realized that safe discontinuation of psychiatric medication is a problem that the psychiatric medicine community is currently discussing. I realized that I’m holding onto a lot of internalized mental health stigma, that I wanted to quit my medication as fast as possible to be rid of a “sign of weakness.” I’m grappling with that as I look down the barrel of a multi-year taper. My side effects on medication aren’t severe, and so I believe I’ll be able to manage a slow taper, especially since I will be returning to work soon. I’m going to wait to stabilize for a few months, and then start a 10% (of previous dose) taper, and see how that sits with my nervous system. I'm heartened, though, that even Mark Horowitz and members of the psychiatric community are affected by this, in just the same way as us layfolk. My heart goes out to all of you, and the suffering that you’ve all endured, especially the first few who had to figure this out for themselves. I’m tremendously grateful for all the wisdom & support here. It’s given me hope that I can get through this. tl;dr: 2015: Start 50mg zoloft for severe depression 2023 June: attempts to get off of zoloft, 50 -> 25 -> 0mg 2023 Sep: Terrible withdrawal at the 2 month point. 2023 Oct: Reinstated 50mg zoloft, working up slowly from 12.5mg. Withdrawal ceases. Will wait a few months for brain to stabilize, and will attempt a "10% of previous dose" taper. Thanks everyone, let's go slow and easy together.
  17. Hi everyone, My name is Audrey and I’m currently in month 9 of protracted withdrawal from stopping 12.5 mgs of sertraline cold turkey for a panic disorder. I’ve been using this forum for months as support to check symptoms/giving me peace of mind and it’s been a god send. I took sertraline on and off for 3 years. I currently am suffering with every symptom imaginable still - some days better than others. Lots of Dysautonomia, heat intolerance, sleep issues, anxiety, POTS symptoms, pounding heart, you name it. I was a hypochondriac before withdrawal happened so this time has not been kind to my nervous system. I know one day I will heal but sometimes it’s so hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I’m 30 and feel like I could be 75+ some days. Here’s to a healing year in 2024!
  18. Hi everyone. Below is the Zoloft tapering schedule I have followed to the present. I didn't notice any withdrawal until dipping below 25mg. As I've gone down from 75mg towards the 50mg and 25mg marks, I began noticing huge improvements (needing less sleep, better/clearer thinking, more sex drive, caring more about work and meeting deadlines). Now I'm experiencing withdrawal (insane bloating, brain fog, needing way more sleep, vertigo, dizziness, lack of coordination, and irritibility) Schedule I followed: March/April 2017: began Zoloft 75mg November 2017: I went down from 75 -> 62.5mg by reducing by 2.5mg every couple of days December 2017: stayed at 62.5mg all month January 2018: went down from 62.5 -> 50mg, reducing 2.5mg every couple of days February: stayed at 50mg all month March to April: went down from 50 -> 25mg, reducing 2.5mg every couple of days early May: stayed at 25mg for 2 weeks late May to present: went down from 25 ->12.5mg, reducing 2.5mg every couple of days. I've been on 12.5mg for one week. The current side effects are almost debilitating. My question is what you think is best to do now? Should I go back up to 25? Should I wait until I stabilize at 12.5mg and then do the 10%/month taper? My worry is that I probably won't stabilize at 12.5mg because it's not even a therapeutic dose, so if I just wait here for a month I'm just prolonging the withdrawal. Any feedback would be much appreciated as I'm torn on what to do next! Thanks to anyone who responds ❤️
  19. Hi everyone! I am a 26 y/o female who was put on Zoloft at age 20 in 2016. I originally was put on the medication for stress and a suicide attempt (that happened a few days after I was put on Lexapro, but that's a story for another day). In 2021 I decided I wanted to be free of the Zoloft and live a med free life to focus on other health issues- extreme fatigue, stomach and constipation issues, and vision decreasing. Oh man I thought it would be so easy (as previously I had gotten off adderall after using for 7 years with barely any side effects). At first I felt fine tapering off the Zoloft- I started in Nov 2021 and got from 50 mg to 25 by Dec 2021, by Jan 1 2022 I was fully off the meds. Oh and let me mention my psychiatrist advised this schedule was fine lol. The past year has been soooooooooo hard for me. I have never felt like this in my life. I first started noticing random memories of childhood come up and thought huh weird, then the brain fog, the anxiety, and the tiredness kicked in. And then the awful depression that I've never experienced like this before. I am still fighting but starting to feel lost and worried mainly about the low moods. My mood can go from happy and ok to severely depressed in a matter of minutes which really scares me. I write this post because I am considering going back on a LOW dose of Zoloft to see if I can get some kind of relief as the past 14 months have been quite literally awful. What would be the recommended reinstated dose? I would want to go in super low so I don't have to go through this ever again. Any thoughts super appreciated! TIMELINE: 2012-2018- adderall 20 mg 2015-2016- lexapro 20 mg 2016 Nov- 2021 Nov Zoloft 50 mg 2021 Dec- Zoloft 25 mg 2022 Jan 1- med free 2022 April- 10 mg Zoloft (did this for about 14 days and then stopped because I thought it didn't help)
  20. Hi all, 3 months off Sertraline. Now feeling like my brain is a bit drunk, vision a bit blurry...but now experiencing random involuntary head twitch (for lack of a better term). Is this common. Wondering if I should see a neurologist. Any thoughts?
  21. Yes, it will feel like a miracle when it happens for you; and it will happen for you, it is just a matter of time. I want to get that out there first thing; it is my belief that we will all heal in time; it has happened for me and is continuing to happen and it will happen for you. Am I completely 100% done healing? No. Am I so, so much better? Oh yes! Now for some basics: Male, mid 50s, took zoloft for over 20 year, quit cold turkey 3.5 years ago, was off 5 months, thought I was relapsing, so started prozac for 3.5 months and then quit that cold turkey. Then I found S.A. and discovered what I was dealing with was not a relapse but withdrawal (and recovery). So yes, I did everything completely wrong and more than once! I am proof that given time we can heal. I currently just celebrated 30 months of being drug free. Now, how to begin to describe the inhumane torture that I have endured until very recently; not sure but I will try. I have gone through both the windows and waves pattern and the continuous misery pattern. I was one of those that suffered a great deal after quitting, but really got slammed at about 6 months off. At 1 year I was barely functioning; at 1.5 years I was still miserable, and at 2 years off I was wondering if I was doomed to endless suffering with no end. But now as I have hit the 2.5 year mark I feel as if I have turned the corner. Windows and waves general comprised the first year and then it became continuous misery for pretty much the next 6 to 12 months or more; and then back to windows and waves. My last serious wave was in months 25-26 and now finally what feels like solid progress the last month or so. I am hesitant to list symptoms because I know how much it use to scare me to read what others were going through; but on the other hand it really helped when a new symptom would start, because I knew it was part of the recovery process and not some disease or sickness, and most of these are gone or have become minimal although they lasted for months or years. And just because I experienced them does not mean that you will, we all have a very individual road to recovery; so here they are in no specific order: Dark depression, anxiety, paranoia, obsessive compulsive, panic attacks, intrusive/obsessive thoughts that tortured me, hopelessness, irrational thinking, suicidal thoughts, brain zaps, intense organic fear, severe inner-body tension that felt like my whole insides were clamped up, sexual dysfunction, severe tension, tremors and pain in the back of my legs and calves, terrible shoulder and upper arm pain, mania, extreme bloating and stomach pain, nausea, dizziness, vertigo, feeling like my brain was on fire, feeling like a part of my brain was missing, feeling like a bomb had gone off in my head, floating head feeling, super-hot face, body temperature regulation problems – being super-hot or cold, constipation, dehydration, lack of appetite and weight loss, feeling dead, anhedonia, akathisia, mood swings, insomnia, terrible brain fog and inability to think clearly, sensitive vision and hearing, inching and burning skin, cold like symptoms, head congestion, phantom smells, constant tinnitus, severe fatigue and exhaustion, health anxiety, I could not read, listen to music, or meditate, heart palpitations, random traveling aching and stabbing pain throughout my body, headaches, and so many other symptoms that I can’t remember. The torture, pain, misery, suffering and utter despair was never ending…until it did finally start to end for me and it will for you too. Did anything help me along the way? I tried many things; acupuncture, vitamins and supplements, alpha-stim, gluten free diet, no sugar diet, no caffeine, no alcohol, and anything else I could do to try and feel better. Did it work? In a sense it all worked because it kept me focused on recovery and gave me hope when I had none, and the possibility that I might feel better. But time passing has been the real healing agent; although that was the last thing I wanted to hear when I was suffering so intensely. I did find that mindfulness, breathing exercises and physical exercise helped when all else failed and I was so truly desperate. Many hours were spent just trying to pay attention to my breath going in and out; and I still use this practice as a relaxation method. It also helped me greatly to visit this website daily as well as Benzo-Buddies. I read success stories for hours at a time, read the Bloom in Wellness facebook page each day and anything by Baylissa Frederick and also Don Killian. So, what remains for me? I still have tinnitus (although it has gotten much better over the last month), stomach bloating and pain on occassion, nerve pain, some brain zaps at night, fatigue and tiredness, and sleep issues. If I had to put some percentages on where I am at now I would say physically I am at about 85-90% healed and mentally/emotionally at 90-95% healed. I now eat anything that I choose although I eat as healthily as possible because I value life so much now and I want to live as long as possible; I exercise regularly and it feels wonderful; I enjoy caffeinated drinks including regular tea and coffee which I had given up for many months; I also drink wine and beer a couple times a week if I choose to and enjoy it. I am in the best shape since high school, and have lost 75 pounds (on purpose). Life is good again and just the simple things are more than enough to bring joy and happiness. So that is my story and I hope it will encourage you as you read it that you will recover and become yourself again. I remember reading similar statements in success stories and thinking, “Yea, right, that is easy for you to say, you are not suffering through this terrible hell right now!” And maybe you are thinking the same thing as I did, but please listen to my words; you will make it, you will recover, you will feel better, and you will join me in loving life once again; just please don’t give up or give in and keep going! As I sit here with a cup of coffee and contemplate what I have been through the last several years, it all seems so strange and foreign. Success stories promised that I would make it to recovery, and they were right, so now it is my turn to tell you that you will make it, “You will make it!”. Wishing everyone here all the best and a quick recovery. Please let me know if you have any questions and I will be happy to try and help. All my love. Pug
  22. Hello to all. Been following for 2 years. Just joined "officially" today. Profile tells just about everything. Stuff getting real and I'm getting tired of fighting.
  23. Hi all, I am 29F and trying to end my relationship with Sertraline/Zoloft but have been having difficulty in that I seem to be able to get to 3 - 4 months of 0mg before my mental health falls off a cliff and I become very mentally unwell. I don't know if this is some sort of delay in my brain realising it is without the additional serotonin and whether it is a temporary adjustment thing or permanently how I will feel without medication. By way of background, I was put on 50mg of Sertraline in 2017 for anxiety. Minimal discussion with my doctor about any side effects or how long I would be on the medication for. Stayed on the medication for 3 1/2 years until decided myself to taper down in 2020. I did research on how to taper and tapered over a number of months, reducing by 50% each time by splitting my pills until I got to 25mg and couldn't split the pills any smaller. During this time, I had minimal withdrawal symptoms, some headaches and digestive upset but nothing too debilitating and they usually went away after a week or two of the reduction in dose. Then in March 2021, following 3 months of 0mg, I had an intense mental episode where I became extremely anxious, depressed, intrusive thoughts and was very unwell. Looking back I notice that the mood had been dropping over the 3 months of 0mg but the symptoms worsened very suddenly. Following a month of difficulty, doctor advised restarting sertraline 50mg. Noticed some improvement upon restarting and then spoke to a Psychiatrist in July 2021 who advised increasing to 100mg and told me 'I could be on this medication for the rest of my life no problem'. The issue was now I didn't want to be on this medication and felt like I couldn't come off it. In particular, I noticed that I am flattened and blunted somewhat on the medication and had worries that this was stopping me feeling attraction or starting a relationship with anyone (don't know if anyone else has had issues or worries about this? I don't mean sexual symptoms in that I don't have no feeling in my genitals or difficulty orgasming - this is more in terms of actually having a romantic interest in someone in the first place). Maintained 100mg for about a year and then decided to reduce again, following the same pattern and again with minimal withdrawal symptoms. The same thing happened again, was largely fine for 3 months but then went away travelling in February 2023 and was struggling and ended up returning home early. From February to March 2023, I was struggling with anxiety and depression but not completely debilitating. Then in April 2023, again it was like my mood fell off a cliff and I had another severe mental illness episode with depression, anxiety etc. I suppose I am coming here looking for advice and support and to see if anyone else has had similar symptoms as I am not able to get answers from the medical community so questions as follows: - has anyone else had minimal symptoms throughout the tapering process and initial 3 months or so of being on 0mg, only then for severe psychological symptoms to set in around 3 months? Due to the gap of time where I am ok (i.e. the 3/4 months), I think most medical doctors view this as a resurgence of original symptoms rather than withdrawal but the symptoms are much more severe than they were before I started medication. My issue I suppose is that I don't know whether this is a temporary thing as my brain is freaking out at no longer having the extra serotonin available and whether it will eventually adjust to the lower levels and therefore whether to push through and try to cope with the psychological distress in the hope it will pass or if I need to go back onto Sertraline. I suppose I'm looking for hope that if I just try and cope with the anxiety and depression, it will eventually lift and I'll get through it and I'll come out the other side but I can't seem to find any advice or information to give me this hope. Thanks, KF2694
  24. When I was 19 I had a terrible break down. Abusive boyfriend, fear of parents, fear of life. I ended up in the hospital. Just a regular hospital under the care of my gyno for what appeared to be anorexia nervousa (however it's spelled). That doctor was smart. He said i was too young for pych meds and had me to start taking b complex. I slowly began to return to normal. If I had ever been normal that is. I had always had a low depression i felt like. I turned to drinking and smoking for social validation and this carried me through college and through my 20's. When I was 28 I left my job to stay home with my baby. My husband and I had just bought a house but thought is was too important to keep our child close. After some depression surrounding a miscarriage, we had a second beautiful son. The isolation was not good. I remember watching Oprah and she was talking about lead in window blinds and how bad the was for our children. I looked over at the blinds in my bedroom with the teeth prints in them from my son standing there waving goodbye to his dad in the mornings. That's when the hot flash of anxiety hit and did not leave. I was testing everything for lead and yes it was everywhere. Then the asbestos. Then on the news, ecoli in the apple juice and meat then worst of all was the women who caused harm to their own children though pychosis. Was I that crazy? Could I be the danger to my babies?? I was sooo terrified!! A doctor put me on xanax and I was told to take it when I needed it. Of course I needed it constantly. For around 2 months I lived in a stupor. Then one day I said forget this and stopped it ct. I was then put on Effexor. Never great but not as anxious. So a different doctor(because the one prescribing me xanax was in a drug treatment facility) added a few things when I mentioned my fears. He added wellbutrin, resperdal because I must be bipolar, which I only took one of thank Heavens, then zyprexa. My world turned upside down again. It was a horrific spiral for several months before I was admitted to a Behavioural Health center. I stayed there for 3 weeks while they ct me off all meds then put me back on zoloft and klonopin. When I left I have to say I was feeling better. It only improved over the following weeks. I even called my klonopin my Hakuna Matata pill. For 17 years all was well, I thought. My mother passed and I had to take care of my dad who had dementia during lockdown. My dad then passed and I got sick after his funeral. The doctor told me if I didn't take the med Levaquin for my pnuemonia I developed after the virus, then she would just have to give it to me intravenously when I was admitted to the hospital. So I took it and it chemically ct me off klonopin. I was a mad woman. Terrified and holding the grief from losing my parents and fearing going down that rabbit hole again 17 years earlier. I started to even out a few months later and decided to come off meds. I found Benzo buddies and Benzo warriors on fb and started my klonopin taper. That had only taken a year since I had only ever been on .5mg. That was two years ago. In March I began my Zoloft taper. 100 mg. will take a whole lot longer. I'm down to 53mg now and the bottom has fallen out. My therapist and sister asked me to go back up to 75 but they don't understand. And now I can't understand. I'm pretty frightened that my life is just circling back to those terrors except this time it's all new fears. I hope I didn't share too much but I wanted to let you know my history. Have I got a chance? Sometimes I think I should just stay on it. I'm 57 and would be tapering maybe 8 more years. I could really use some friends. I feel so alone in this. Although my family is great none of them have any idea what it's like. Thank you,
  25. I used to be very happy and funny guy who loved dancing and enjoyed going out with friends until one night I got drunk and someone put drugs in my drinks.I still dont know what that drug was but I felt like my legs were burning and I became very agressive and delusional.I got locked up for trying to brake into a house and send into a mental hospital. I was forced to take zyprexa for 3 months and after that zoloft for 2 months. Since then I lost all feelings and emotions. For all I mean: fear, love, hate, envy,everithing.I've Lost all my friends. No desire to live, I feel like an empty shell. Complete lack of creativity, lack of social skills Lack of empathy, lack of motivation and a sense of accomplishment. 5 months ago I stopped taking zyprexa but I have no improvement and Im beginning to think that my brain is permanently damaged by these drugs. Is there any hope that my brain will recover?
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