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  1. Hi, My name is Kai. I was prescribed three meds in the first day. Those were Abilify, Agotine, and Topiramate. I took them instantly after the meeting with psychiatrist. I was very stressed. I felt not understood. But that wasn't the problem. The problem occured when I took the second dose after few hours. I started feeling a strange amount of satisfaction. It was night, and I felt as if I was in a kind of a transitional state. I remember feeling almost supernatural. There was a different day, which I guess I did almost the same thing after meeting the psychiatrist. I remember it was a day, and the dose might have been changed. Also there might have been added the new pill, Risperidone. I felt great agitation. I could not stop moving. I saw hallucination. I felt my world was melting down. My world was never the same after that. Honestly, I don't remember if those two were the same day or not. And many other things occured in the other days, but those were what happened when I was struck by meds instantly. The other days, I felt also very unreal. I felt my world was changing into something else. Since it was the first time I was using the antipsychotics, I thought this was what it was supposed to be doing. Later, I started losing my musical abilities. It happened gradually. One day suddenly, I simply wasn't able to play anymore. I still cannot play to this day. Before, I was great at many instruments. I was a musician by heart, feeling arts all throughout the world, loving the poetry and literature, and so on. I also loved movies, but those all disappeared. I was somewhere apart from the world I used to be in before. There was no 'me' anymore. No more interest, feelings, thoughts, memories. But I was still able to enjoy movies to some extent until I became bedridden. Being bedridden was when I was completely done in my life. At least that is what I felt. But while I was being bedridden, I slowly recovered in a strange way. It took a long time, and the recovery didn't show any promise of my previous self, I started to feel some normal feelings again, which was not really pleasing to me. I don't know if it was because I was being bedridden, relying on to my family, losing my independence and hope, but the reality felt much worse and resembled that feeling of unfortunate childhood that I've been through. I felt totally immature. I am very sorry my writing doesn't articulate anything good. I have tried to write this introduction since the beginning of this year, but it took so long to even be able to write something that doesn't look terrible. So since I know you, which are great people who chose to help, would kindly write replies to this pitiful writing, and if you do so and ask me for more specifics, I will try my best to tell more about my symptoms and situations. It also takes very long time for me to remember something, including what I ate for breakfast. Thank you.
  2. Attila

    Attila

    Hi Everyone! A friend of my recommended this site where l hope to get some support. For 2years ago around the covid l collapsed mentaly and the Anafranil l used to take did not worked anymore. After that my doc tried 10different antidepressants (ssri ssrn etc) none of those seemd to work. I feltbso bad that l spent 4week in a mental clinic where they described my Parnassan (10mg in the evening) Agomelatin (50mg in the evening) Lamolep (100mg in the evening), but somehow l dont feel better. At the moment my anxiety is that strong that l had to take Frontin (benzo) 0,25mg to calm down. I am so fed up this meds those are poisoning me l am sure. I dont know what to do, how to start getting off them. l take also some supplements like magnesium, omega3, copper, zinc, b complex, probiotics l would appreciate some support! thank you
  3. Hi folks, please find an introduction to my psychiatric history. I desperately need of any support or advice. I started anti-depressant in 1994. This was changed to Prozac 1996, followed by Venaflaxine in 1999. My prayers were seemingly answered in 2000, when I was changed to Sertraline in 2000. Doze was quickly increased to 150mg two months in. I stayed on same drug and doze for 23 years! In 2022, I suffered mental health crisis due to overwork. I was quickly informed that Sertraline was no longer working but couldn't go off it due to duration of treatment. My then psych added Quitiapine as adjunct and Pregabalin. In Feb, my new psych decided to change Sertraline to Duloxatine. She tapered over 5 days! On 6th day I broke down and was put back on Sertraline. Three months ago I was taken off Sertraline again, cross-tapered with Duloxetine over three weeks. One week in started with unbelievable intense symptoms - anxiety attacks, problems with motor-skills and walking gait, freezing cold and diarrhoea. Psych then stopped Duloxetine after 6 weeks as psych doesn't think it was working. One week taper and then put on Escotalipram. By now I was bed bound and on Diazepam 7mg daily. Couldn't tolerate Escotalipram so taken off after two weeks. No taper, started Agnomelatine. Three days in. Couldn't stop being sick and quit. Constantly now have terrible side affects anxiety attacks, stomach pains, sweats, constantly feeling cold. Psych states nothing to do with withdrawal and wants me to go back on sertraline. Lost all hope now. Know this is the withdrawal effects but no professional. If anyone has any advice or similar stories I would massively appreciate it.
  4. Hello, I was not drug free for a long time. I got depressed again a so ended on drugs again. Did not know what else to do. Doing quite poorly now. I have a lot of anxiety and trouble sleeping. Currently, on 50mg sertraline and 25mg agomelatine. Weird thing is that even when I am in a good mood and anxiety is at bay I wont be able to fell asleep. Whenever I feel my brain is slumbering off then "zzap" and I wake up. I think it is the sertraline, that is preventing me from sleep. I'm just in a bad place mentally and cannot try to discontinue the drug as I'd than spiral downward into even more terrible depressions and anxiety. I tried to quit the sertraline CT once and endured it only for 3 days. It was much worse than Venlafaxine withdrawal that I once experienced. It is definitely possible. Or the the Sleep Apnoea is just accidental finding. Lot of people have mild apnoa, but re asymptomatic.
  5. Hello everyone! First of all, I'd like to share my story. My introduction to psychiatry happened due to a ridiculous misunderstanding. I'm a programmer, and in 2021, I worked quite a lot for several months without proper rest. I stayed up late, and as a result, I experienced severe fatigue. I was concerned about dizziness, poor sleep, cold hands, and sometimes increased anxiety with a feeling of shortness of breath (oh, how trivial they were in reality). These symptoms made me turn to the first neurologist, who prescribed Cinnarizine, presenting it as a means of improving cerebral circulation. After taking this Cinnarizine for a month and a half, my condition worsened, and I felt mild apathy. It became difficult to work, and concentration was also affected. As I later found out, Cinnarizine acts similarly to neuroleptics on dopamine receptors and calcium channels. Then I had the misfortune of turning to a second neurologist, who diagnosed me with an anxiety disorder and prescribed the antidepressant Trazodone and the neuroleptic Sulpiride (all of this happened in March 2022). From that moment on, my life turned into a nightmare. And despite the fact that I only took Trazodone for two weeks at a dose of 100-150 mg and Sulpiride for two weeks at a dose of 100 mg. The number of symptoms has expanded from the initial 4-5 to... up to 200 terrible symptoms. Here is just a part of this list: there was muscle rigidity and drooling (parkinsonism) couldn't take a full breath, was constantly suffocating for several months called an ambulance multiple times a day had episodes of breathing cessation swallowing was disrupted, food got stuck in the throat (dysphagia) felt like I had lost myself, like I wasn't me developed akathisia, constantly pacing around the house constantly complained and asked for help couldn't understand text and video, didn't understand people's conversations couldn't continue working as a programmer, lost income for several months went into a huge debt felt like I was between worlds, as if I wasn't entirely myself (derealization) weakness appeared, couldn't do sports anymore started sitting at home all the time double vision appeared had constipation and bloating, dryness in the mouth and some red spots on the tongue In general, the entire list would be too long to publish. At that time, I didn't understand what was happening at all, because I had never taken any medication in my life, and I rarely got sick with a cold. Therefore, I started undergoing a large number of different tests and consulting with various doctors, mainly neurologists and psychiatrists, because regular therapists couldn't find anything and didn't know what was wrong with me. Due to constant suffocation, I couldn't sleep and somehow managed to fall asleep only on my stomach for 1-3 hours. Therefore, the next doctor prescribed me... Quetiapine for sleep. I took it for two weeks in a dosage of 25 mg. It's clear that it didn't improve my condition. The next step was to visit a private clinic, where they gave me vitamins, cleaned my blood from toxins, but also for some reason gave me... Risperidone. I took this medication for a week in a dosage of 3-4 mg and for about two weeks in a dosage of 2 mg. In addition, I took Escitalopram for one month in a dosage of 10-20 mg, Mianserin for one week, and Agomelatine for two weeks as a sleep aid, one tablet, I don't remember the exact dosage. Then, on Risperidone, I gained more than 10 kg of excess weight in just a couple of weeks, walked slowly like a turtle, and looked like a zombie. Eventually, I realized that doctors wouldn't help me and started to investigate the situation on my own. I reconstructed the timeline of events and saw that things started to worsen from the moment I started taking medication. It was in August 2021 when I was still taking Agomelatine. I decided to quit all medication immediately and only use natural and safe remedies for my recovery. At first, I deeply researched the topic of neuroleptics and antidepressants and for a couple of months was horrified by the realization of the situation I was in. Very few people reported a complete and successful recovery even after discontinuing these medications. However, although rare, there were stories of people who got better. I started my journey to recovery and decided to apply everything possible. At first, I learned about all types of damage that these drugs can cause. They include: loss of nerve tissue due to neurotoxic action (that's why neurogenesis stimulation is needed in any case) receptor blocking disturbance of neurotransmitter balance severe avitaminosis (the body neutralizes toxins by binding them to vitamins) disturbance in the functioning of the genetic apparatus (which is why the side effects are so difficult to correct) mitochondrial dysfunction (it is precisely for this reason that there are strong asthenia, type 2 diabetes, heart problems, and many other side effects of neuroleptics) accumulation of psychotropics in the body tissues (metabolites can be detected in urine even a year after intake) worst of all, psychotropics also disrupt the functioning of stem cells, DNA repair systems, and neurogenesis. This greatly complicates recovery in addition, all organs and systems, not just the nervous system, are affected Then I began to search for all existing methods and means to correct each of these disorders and apply them in practice. As a result, it took me about 10 months to alleviate approximately 80% of the symptoms. I lost weight and my libido and erectile function were fully restored, my dreams became vivid and interesting again, it became much easier to breathe and engage in sports, and I could work as a programmer again. In two months, I paid off all my debts and started making a profit. I started to deeply and thoroughly study biochemistry, genetics, and neurobiology. Now I can't find doctors who can tell me something new, they know much less than me and now they should pay me for consultations, not the other way around. Some of them at least honestly admit it. At the moment, I still have some consequences from the psychotropic drugs. The most worrying are a slight stiffness of the neck muscles, a crunch in the throat when swallowing, a slight brain fog that occurs quite rarely (previously it was constant to the level of semi-fainting), and a slight weakness. I continue to work on eliminating the consequences and understand that it will take some more time. What I have learned: there are methods for restoring DNA and it is not CrisprCas9, it's a completely different method it's possible to accelerate neurogenesis by at least 5 times there are many ways to naturally increase dopamine without taking antiparkinsonian drugs in any case, it is necessary to replenish vitamin reserves. In particular, it is necessary to pay attention to vitamin E, vitamin B3, Omega 3, Q10, alpha-lipoic acid, and others. it is necessary to live correctly for a long time in terms of daily routine, nutrition, physical activity, etc. so that regeneration processes proceed as quickly as possible In the end, I decided to deeply and thoroughly study this issue, but it takes time. Anyone who wants to support my research, with the permission of the administration, I can give my contact information. I want to work on research and restoration of the nervous system, and at the moment, there is already a large amount of material that needs to be turned into a book or something similar. In addition, as a programmer, I can create a website with a recovery journal, brain structure tests, publications of restoration methods, and more. I am waiting for your suggestions.
  6. Hello everyone, I don’t even know where to start. My 19 years old girlfriend was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia, depression and OCD in 2015 when she was 13 years old. She was also hospitalized 3 times. We’re together for 9 months. This month, roughly month after tapering off Cipralex, my girlfriend started having, which I think are withdrawal symptoms (suicidal ideation, really bad anhedonia, drowsiness, sometimes pressure like feeling on the whole head). She told me she experienced anhedonia even in year 2018 after mental “downfall” (complete fall to the depression and suicidal black hole) after cold turkeying Zoloft and Abilify (don’t remember the dosage, haven’t taken those regularly) and feelings haven’t come back since, maybe only briefly. Before that she normally felt every emotion. She had psychiatric appointment yesterday and she’s supposed to start taking Abilify again, which I don’t know it’s a good idea with the cocktail she already have. Her psychiatrist also said, there’s possibility of her not taking these drugs the whole lifetime and also said the tapering Cipralex wasn’t that fast while simultaneously starting Brintellix (vortioxetine). I just want her to be happy and help. I don’t know how to help her with getting her feelings back and whether that’s still a WD symptom after 2018 fall. The thing she’s deeply sad about the most is the emotional numbness. She’s also experiencing loss of libido from year 2018. I have a hope she doesn’t have to take those drugs forever, but don’t know whether she should start tapering them now or not or maybe later? Is Abilify a good idea? Is emotional numbness caused by the pills or rather withdrawal? Any advice on what to do is greatly appreciated. Thank you bunch, everyone.
  7. Hi Im on Valdoxan around 3 year , I would like to stop now , I tired cold Turkey but after a few days I had to go back on them as I had terrible mental anguish feeling i was going mad suicidal thoughts , I had to go back on them ASAP and all the feelings left me ... I take 25 mg but take it in half every second night ... Has anyone managed to taper off this drug ? Im scared Ill be on it forever ..
  8. Hey all! This is my first post here and I'm so glad I found this forum. I've been feeling desperate for months. My question is about drug-induced derealization. I took the combo of Effexor + Valdoxan and only felt good for a month while being on them. In hindsight I almost seemed manic. Then, suddenly, I got very strong derealization that lasted for weeks. It lifted a bit for a few feeks and then came about again when I had a drink one night. I have now tapered off Effexor, I took my last pill about three weeks ago. Three days ago I also started tapering off Valdoxan. I take Oxazepam to cope with the symptoms. I feel like I broke my brain for good. The only other time I've felt derealization was when I ate a hash brownie and clearly it was too much for me. I used to be a caring and fun person before going on the antidepressants. Right now I feel like I'm just completely empty inside. I do and feel things because I know I have to, but I seriously don't care about anything at all. When I do feel emotion, it's mostly fear or worry. Has anyone else expierienced drug-induced DR? Did it go away when you started to withdraw from the drug? How do you cope with this?
  9. Hi. After three years I want to come off Agomelatine (Valdoxan). I'm in the UK but my Psych is in Spain so can't ask him for info until I go back. My main concern is that (together with 10 mg diazepam for which there is lots of tapering info), I find it helps my insomnia tremendously but I wake up feeling like a zombie. Trying to get info on how to taper, I take 25mg. I read there are supposed to be no withdrawal effects but has anyone come off it and found they can't sleep? I need to come off it as NHS won't prescribe it and I can no longer afford it. Many thanks
  10. MODERATOR NOTE: Click here to read tips on how to make a liquid As I am taking a medication not many people have experience with, there is no topic about tapering it. I am not at a stage to start tapering Valdoxan, but I constantly worry, that once I wish to start, there is no information or support available for me to take guidance from. So I started this topic here and I am asking if anyone has any piece of information on how one would go about tapering Valdoxan, please be so kind and post here. Or if you know of anybody who has already done it or if you have stumbled upon any information anywhere else in the Web. Perhaps by the time I am ready to taper these pieces of information will have formed a good plan. Background: The Valdoxan pill has a coating so I am worried what will happen, if I break it. It has no line for breaking either. Also I have no idea if it would be ok to make it into a liquid. I would like to do a liquid taper, if possible, because I see no other way to do it accurately. It is said to have an effect on the melatonin system and the pharmaceutical company claims it has no WD. I know better not to believe that but could it still be a bit of a good sign that they have not had acute WD problems in their short term studies? Or am I too naive to hope that?
  11. Hello & thank you to anyone reading this. I am trying to find out if anyone knows what damage the antidepressants I was given have done to me. I have tried 4 different types all which made me very unwell. The reason I started them was because 1.5 years after having breast cancer aged 35 I woke up one day with severe debilitating fatigue which left me bedbound, along with ringing in the ears, weakness and dizzy. (Up until this point 1.5 years later I had been completely fine following the chemotherapy). I have now been bedbound for 4 years with this undiagnosed condition and as the years have continued I decided to try antidepressants to try and take away the anxiety of my situation. I have tried citalopram, pregabalin, prozac and then mirtzapine. All had severe bad effects so I tapered off & stopped taking them. The effects didn't seem to be the general side effects you read about online but instead it made my symptoms I've listed above 100 times worse. The ringing in my ears increased along with the fatigue. At one point I was so weak on them I could no longer walk and felt like I would collapse on standing. I tried the 4 types I've listed in desperation one after each other hoping that one would work, but i feel that maybe after trying each one my symptoms never returned to how they were before I started it and I've just got worse and worse and maybe never recovered from taking them. The last one I took was mirtzapine which I stopped taking 5 months ago now (Managed to take it for 3 months, it made my fatigue so much worse and I slept for 13 hrs a night so I tapered off slowly) but when I started to come off it every symptom increased and now 5 months later I still feel terrible. Fatigue, ringing in ears & weakness worse than ever before. Could anyone tell me if Antidepressants can do this? Make you feel unwell for this long after coming off them? I don't understand what has happened! My doctor has suggested I try Agomelatine telling me it has no side effects or withdrawal effects. I'm really scared it might make me even worse but I desperately want to try something as the anxiety of being bedbound like this forever is so bad. Any opinions greatly received. Thank you so much!
  12. I have had a pretty breezy life. No real financial problems. Meet my wonderful hubby when I was 19. Owned horses that I loved. All that fell in a big heap when with no warning my hubby of 44 years died. I became suicidally depressed and was put on Valdoxan. I have found it very helpful but don't want to be on it for ever. So how do you know when to even think about coming for an AD? I know the answer is talk to your doctor but how do they know when you should think about coming off your AD? How do you learn to live without and AD?
  13. RipVanWinkle

    RipVanWinkle

    Firstly, I want to say how grateful I am to have found this forum and to get a feel for the way it is moderated. Calm, practical and sensible advice from and to those who need it. My 14-year marriage broke down five years ago. I walked straight into a new relationship and the love hormones stopped me from feeling too bad. But when they wore off about 3 years ago (I'm still in love with her without the wash of hormones), I realised that I had become a profoundly sad person with little capacity for joy or pleasure. There were many things but perhaps the clearest example is that I stopped listening to music, once one of my deepest pleasures; there was simply nothing in it for me. Music that once moved me to tears of joy just buzzed in my ears annoyingly. So 25 months ago I started taking Cymbalta. One day, about 2 weeks after starting medication, I caught myself cheerfully humming a tune walking down the street. It actually worked... Wonder Drug!! But life moved on, some of the circumstances that had pushed me into depression softened, and I decided I should be okay without drugs. I was never really depressed before my marriage breakdown so I should be able to stop taking Cymbalta right? Within a couple of days of stopping, (without medical advice), I was swamped with an indescribable sense of impending doom. It was as if everything I trusted was going to fail me and everyone I loved would be lost to me. Describing it now does not capture how utterly hopeless, empty and scared I felt without the drug. I went straight back on Cymbalta and spoke to my psychiatrist who scolded me and said, "This is a long term thing. Don't expect to come off Cymbalta for a long time." That was about 9 months ago and I have decided that I disagree with her. I want to come off it now. I now associate Cymbalta with a bland kind of nothingness. I don't "feel" like I once was able to "feel". It has taken away something real. Hard to define, but I want it back. Three weeks ago I started taking my capsule on alternate days. I noticed the difference in my awareness and general mood, but that has stabilised and I seem to be coping with one dose every second day. I know that this approach is discouraged on this site so I have some reading to do, but it does seem to be working for me so far. For now I will stick to this dose and see how I go. I do not expect to reduce again for some weeks or longer. And, yes, I will tell my psychiatrist before I reduce again. My name is Rip Van Winkle. Sometimes feel as if I have suddenly woken up, at the age of 48, and have a lot of catching up to do.
  14. How are you doing, RipVanWinkle? I am currently having hard time with valdoxan withdrawal after being on it about 1 year, and stopped cold turkey. Previously I have stopped it without any withdrawal, so it was/is weird for me that it's there. So far the worst symptom I'm experiencing is blurred, hypersensitive vision, and it hasn't improved in a month.
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