Search the Community

Hello to all users of this forum! This is Jan - husband of Dominique and father of a 4.5-month old son. I am currently writing here for my wife, who is lying in bed next to me and is of course aware of this forum and my contribution. My wife gave birth to our son in July. A lack of postpartum and a few other things led to her getting postpartum depression in August with difficulty sleeping through the night (only 3-4 hours a day). At first we couldn't really place it and for a few weeks we suspected other things as the cause. I tried to support her where I could, but the sleep problems (depression) continued. That's why we had a blood test done at the hospital at the beginning of October to check whether the pituitary gland was damaged. According to the test results and the doctor, there was nothing wrong with the gland. However, she informed the psychiatrists at the hospital who asked us to come for an appointment. They told us that my wife suffers from depression and that she urgently needs antidepressants. 50mg Sertraline and 5mg Diazepham at the beginning. There could be side effects at the beginning (which exactly were not said), but these would soon disappear. My wife would soon feel better. One of the health officers told us that she might have suicidal thoughts at the beginning, so it was important to watch her intake very closely. We have always lived a very healthy life and have not taken any medication so far. I consulted a few friends and the unanimous opinion was "Antidepressants are not good, but a short-term crutch. Once the depression / sleep problems are better, stop it again". Already very exhausted by the last few weeks and encouraged by the doctors' and friends' assessment, I did not consult further and persuaded my wife to take the antidepressants. A terrible mistake! Taking the medication over time like this: 13.10.21 - 50mg Sertraline + 2mg Diazepam (doctors suggested 5mg, stop after 7 days). 13.11.21 - 75mg Sertraline (doctors suggested 100mg) 14.11.21 - 50mg Sertraline (reduction because side effects) 15.11.21 - 10mg (decission to stop sertraline) 16.11.21 - 20mg 17.11.21 - 20mg 18.11.21 - no more Sertraline since then The side effects: The first few days went relatively well. My wife was able to sleep a little more (6.5 hours - thanks to Diazepham?). Strong side effects were not noticeable at the beginning. Weaning off the diazepham after a few days was uncomplicated. After we had a conversation with a doctor every 2-3 days at the beginning, the critical initial phase seemed to be over. After some time, my wife noticed slight hair loss and increased bruising. However, she could not pinpoint the cause. A lot of cortisol from the depression could also have been a reason. A head pressure, especially in the morning, was noticeable and slowly became stronger. About 4 weeks later, my wife told me that she was having suicidal thoughts and that I had better lock the front door. I was surprised and shocked. I had the feeling that the anti-depressants had made the anxiety disappear and that there were no more panic attacks. Of course, I was in an absolute alarm mood and took my wife's statement very seriously. I started to inform myself about Sertraline. 2 days later I had another appointment with a psychiatrist and my wife also had to pick up a new pack of Sertraline from her doctor. Both advised to increase the dose to 100mg after one month. However, my wife did not mention her suspected side effects and suicidal thoughts at the appointments. Instead of 100mg, we only increased to 75mg. The side effects after taking it, especially the suicidal thoughts became even more intense. For us, there was now a clear connection between the side effects and Sertraline. Stop Sertraline: Suicidal thoughts as side effects are gross. That's why we wanted the stuff out of my wife's body as soon as possible. A doctor's appointment was imminent. Here I dealt more comprehensively with the subject of antidepressants. A change to another class (tricyclic?), additional drugs to tide her over until she was adjusted to the new antidepressant. In forums I have seen how one gets more and more dependent and how it becomes more and more difficult to stop. We no longer had confidence in the doctors who surprised us with the diagnosis of depression and the immediate prescription of antidepressants (we were there for an examination of the pituitary gland). Doctors who had not informed us about the blatant side effects. In my opinion, they also started us on too high a dose and recommended increasing it to 100mg. Hence the decision to continue without doctors / psychiatrists from now on. My assessment was that the intake period of 31 days at 50mg is relatively short and low. A very short intermediate step (3 days with 20/10mg Sertraline) would hopefully be sufficient. The side effects with suicide thoughts extreme. I thought it would be dangerous to stop for weeks/months. Since 18.11. my wife has stopped taking Sertraline. Current status: The time after stopping Sertraline was / is really intense! I don't feel it myself, but as a husband and father I am with my wife 24 hours / 7 days a week. Look after her and take care of her. Shortly after coming off the suicidal thoughts became very strong. I have locked away dangerous objects from the flat and sleep with my mattress outside her door (so I can also look after our son who sleeps in the next room without waking my wife like that). The suicidal thoughts have decreased now, but I am still extremely mindful. The worst side effect / withdrawal symptom for my wife is the head pressure. This head pressure started insidiously when she started taking Sertraline. However, it still persists and is consistently at a very high level. From 6 - 10 am in the morning this time is extreme. She then takes high doses of vitamin C and I have to stroke and comfort her. But the head pressure is really very extreme. My wife says "head pressure of death", "I'm losing my mind" and says I don't want to go on living like this. Cries, screams and is desperate. From midday onwards, a kind of "switch" seems to be flipped, even though the head pressure is still there. Luckily we can usually go for a walk then and have been to cafes / restaurants. We hope that this really blatant side effect will diminish over time. The sympthoms of depression have now returned. My wife sees a lot of things negatively, thinks of the good times during pregnancy and blames herself. Fear of little sleep and headaches in the morning has returned. There have also been three mild panic attacks since then. These things are ok and we are looking at different ways to get better. With the "anxiety" coming back, other feelings are coming back too, which is nice. After 4 weeks of Sertraline, I have found my wife to be an emotionless robot. There are no other side effects. The bruises on the legs have decreased significantly, the hair loss has decreased. What we do to alleviate the side effects / withdrawal / depression: - Freshly squeezed juices - Only raw vegetables and nuts if possible - Vitamin C in high doses (especially in the morning) - Vitamin B complex (very cautious, as it may increase headaches in the short term) - Vitamin D (very cautious) - Omega 3 (very cautious, as it may aggravate headaches) - Drink a lot (water, lemon juice + Himalayan salt) - Walk every day if possible - Meditation / positive visualisation if possible - Epsom / magnesium bath - Sleep goggles - Daylight lamp (still cautious, as it may increase headaches) - Towards evening, if possible, "normality" (watch travel reports) - NO sugar or bread etc. Our contribution may read simple and not serious. But I can say that the last 5 weeks on Sertraline were really physically and mentally extremely exhausting - first of all for my wife, but also for me. Since the months before were also very exhausting for various reasons and with a baby, we are really at the limit. I am of course aware that most people on this forum have had much longer and more gruelling experiences with antidepressants. I have an inkling of what this may mean and what strong personalities are on this forum, but certainly tragic fates as well. It saddens me that people can be so destroyed by antidepressants in the hope of help. My wife and I would be very happy to receive assessments, perhaps valuable tips and an exchange of experiences with people who also have extreme head pressure due to Sertraline / Zoloft. Jan & Dominique

My story appears to be similar to many folks here on this forum. Reading all of these accounts has helped me accept my symptoms as a result of Zoloft, which has at least given me some piece of mind. Before I explain my timeline and struggle with getting off Zoloft, I want to bring to the forum’s attention something my psychiatrist informed me of which I have found no evidence of elsewhere. Hopefully someone can verify this. My psychiatrist explained the following: The FDA allows for a 30% upward or downward margin of error on Zoloft pills. He explained that a 50mg Sertraline (Zoloft) may have up to 65mg or as low as 38.5mg. Another example, a 25mg Sertraline may have have as much as 32.5mg and as low as 17.5mg. Can anyone validate this? If this is true, it is unimaginable. My story: I started 50mg of Zoloft in 2012 for general anxiety, social stress and general dissatisfaction. My psychiatrist at the time said “It was about as harmful as taking an aspirin.” In 2013 we increased my dose to 75mg. My psychiatrist retired in 2015 and I continued at 75mg through my general doctor’s refills. In 2018, I felt I was in a good place and tried to go cold turkey. After a couple of weeks of torture, I returned to 75mg. After learning that I should taper, and also feeling I was in a good place, I decided to reduce my dose to 50mg in July of 2019. Two weeks of intense symptoms ensued but by the end of the second week things became more manageable. I wanted to reduce the symptoms and requested (it took some convincing of my new psychiatrist) a liquid form of Sertraline in August. I reduced to 45mg but felt like I was not getting a consistent dose (sticking to the glass) and it was difficult to swallow even when mixed with water. My psychiatrist recommended that I switch to a 25mg pill + a half and a quarter of another 25mg pill bringing me to 42.5mg in September. I stayed at 42.5mg for September and October and was distracted by a series of sinus infections (antibiotics and 2 rounds of prednisone). Thinking I was ill from the infections, I did not realize most of my symptoms were Zoloft related. All of my symptoms were rationalized but my general doctors. Dizziness, light headed, extreme head pressure, headaches, persistent neck pain, fogginess, loss of appetite, ear pops and pings, jittery, imbalance, loss of equilibrium, flu-like symptoms and tingles in hands...doctors all rationalized them as symptoms of sinus/ear infection and the steroids. This went on for almost 2 months, while somehow I was still functioning. Until I called my psychiatrist last week and he informed me that it might be because we switched to a smaller pill which may have 30% less than is listed on the bottle. He prescribed the 50mg for me and within 2 days I felt somewhat improved, but noticed some brain zaps and the continuation of symptoms. My psychiatrist said that 50mg may not be enough to counteract a withdrawal and that we may need to go up to 75mg to stabilize. This past Sunday (10/27) I upped my dosage to 75mg. I am feeling some improvement, but still not feeling right: light headed, light sensitivity, headaches, fogginess, inconsistent appetite, ear pops and pings, jittery, imbalance and tingles in hands... So I am back where I started, 75mg, and hopefully stabilizing soon. Lots of information here from fellow “survivors” but I am scared. Shouldn’t I feel totally better? Could a couple months of enduring withdrawal make stabilizing more difficult? And most importantly, is the 30% margin of error that my psychiatrist shared with me true?? If so, we need to change that! Thank you for your time.

Hi, I'm running out of what to read, who to ask and soon what to say. Ready for this? 1. I am consciously normal and functional 2. and only 2 I have a brain and body that is not cooperating. I feel guilty, or fake. When i'm at work and talking well - in my head I'm like "Who are you? You were never smart"... < probably my childhood echos > Once a major mistake occurred 6 years ago - I fell to the ground mentally - not able to let it go, no matter how many angles and closures I sought. 5 years this misery lasted to where I did get a human validation, but quickly was influenced into something else that made me question my "healing" - and now those 5 years of misery was much easier. To add to my pain - just months after ground 0, my Dad went to jail, my mom move in with me, my cat died weeks after that... Symptoms since: Head tension, Tinnitus, Neck tension, Dizziness, Anticipatory Anxiety, Feeling like I have a tumor in my head (pressure), Depersonalization moments / Derealization moments (Rare but terrible). Had a bout of agoraphobia. I think it's rooting in excessive guilt that I'm putting myself in mental prison. Now I lost my job in July and been on unemployment - and fearing getting a new one... not sure if I can mentally handle it. I feel total burnout. Medication History > After years of CBT - it was suggested I get on medication. Prozac - by day 22 I wanted to die (literally) but gladly i'm too afraid to and go off it when the Dr. kept pushing me to "Give it more time" Celexa & Paxil - gave me an intense panick attack. Paxil sent me to the hospital (One Pill did that) Zoloft & Lexapro - These numbed my brain, but I lost all emotions - that was my first de-realization and very scary Anafranil - this felt like someone poured mercury in my head - zips and zaps Buspar - These gave me brown outs of the brain Xanax - I put this last but I was on it for 6 years... it was great! BUT ... in time .25 didn't work, .5 gave me a hangover... 1mg wouldn't work if I was really scared - like going in an MRI Machine. When I tried to come off - my brain EXPLODED in Withdrawl. I tried many courses - as my DR just told me "stop it - it's ok"... That was when the Tinnitus and Pressure started (4/2016) along with the agoraphobia. I suffered through a water taper I came up with and it worked to a point and was too hard. My Dr. humored me giving me Valium to taper. It SORT of Worked but he gave me only 2 weeks and low dose. I pushed through and now I'm 9 weeks off (i did cheat on a 0.125 two weeks ago). Finally I'm trying St. John's Wort I followed an online suggestion ... but I did it wrong... by end of week 2 I got a massive Burnout feeling, brain buzzing and a STOP EVERYTHING cry in my sub-conscious mind... never had this happen. I dropped my cleaning tools and went to bed. I have not felt good since. I cut down to ONE 300 pill per day... but i'm all over the place. I now wonder if I even have a Serotonin issue? How do I know it's not an Acetylcholine issue? Or just a lack of GABA & Dopamine? (I took up a study of Neuro-Science among other medical classes... of course it's all theory) I'm just not happy, I can't play guitar or do anything I love... I don't care to eat. Thank you all for whatever input you have -Rob

Hi! I'm Britt777. I joined this site to figure out what is causing me numerous symptoms. Here is my brief story: Took Lexapro for about 3 years or more, came off of it Tried Trintillex and Brintillex, didn't like the way it made me feel Doctor then tried Fluvoxamine 100mg and took that for 7 months. He decided to add Wellbutrin (Bupropion XL 150mg) along with it. A month later I ask to stop Fluvoxamine (Luvox) because I felt like I was experiencing "depersonalization" or pretty much felt like life was not real and was a dream. So, at that appointment he told me to stop the Fluvoxamine and upped my Wellbutrin to 300mg once a day. The first day from this switch I felt great. Then the second day came... had nausea, lightheadedness, dizziness, "brain zaps", increased tinnitus (ringing in the ears), blurry vision, feeling like I could pass out, headaches, head pressure, and crazy fluctuating heart rate. (Today I had a heart rate of 100 and dropped to 70 within 5 minutes without doing anything different.) This is day 7 since the switch. I just want to find out if it's withdrawal symptoms from the Fluvoxamine since he didn't advise me to taper or if it's a reaction to upping the Wellbutrin.

Hi all! I have been reading these forums for months and finally decided to share my story in the hope that perhaps it will help others and also that some may have some good advice. I was prescribed Xanax 0.5 mg about 4 years ago after experiencing severe insomnia due to stress of starting a new job (new grad critical care nurse working night and day shift). I took it roughly 2-3 times per week for approximately 3.5 years. I occasionally took it a little more and slightly higher doses (up to 0.75 mg) if I felt like I needed to be knocked out to sleep. I never took it during the day. I got a new doc, who switched me to Lorazepam 0.5 mg last year after stating Xanax was too addictive. I found that I needed to take two pills and sometimes add a glass of wine in order to achieve the same sleep-inducing effect. A few times I experienced "brain zaps" or high levels of anxiety when the drugs wore off, but I never quite attributed this to interdose withdrawal. I went on vacation, May 2015, and I took both Xanax and Lorazepam at the same time due to being low on Xanax for about 4 days straight. I experienced terrible rebound insomnia and did not sleep for about 3 days straight. I did not associated this with the benzos and had a friend prescribe Lunesta 3 mg to help me sleep. I began taking this on top of Lorazepam 1 mg for about 2 weeks. After my first few days mixing these drugs, I began to feel very strange. Things did not look quite right (I now realize I was having depersonalization) and I began to get severe head pressure in the evening (very tight band around the head) and almost blacking out in the shower. I began to feel a sense of impending doom and constantly felt anxious. Caffeine and alcohol made things ten times worse. My GP had me wean off Lorazepam over 2 weeks and then stop altogether. My DP/DR became very severe and lasted approximately 3 months, slowly improving over that time. However, my original insomnia + withdrawal insomnia came back full force and I would be working 12 hour night shifts after days of no sleep. It was not safe for me or my patients, obviously. I had to work a reduced schedule for over a month. I felt depressed and highly anxious and could not function. Desperate, I found a psychiatrist and she suggested trying Lexapro and Trazodone for the anxiety/depression. After a few weeks of benzo withdrawal, I broke down and started Lexapro 5 mg/day and Trazodone 50-75 mg per night. Within a week I felt a little calmer and started sleeping better. I felt confused and spacey on the Lexapro but was willing to put up with it since I was sleeping better. Within weeks, my doc increased my dose to 10 mg Lexapro. I started feeling like I couldn't sit still and was constantly "buzzing" and felt restless just sitting down. I had increased hand tremors (these started after quitting benzos) and felt very out of it. I started having trouble with my eyesight and had to start wearing my glasses at all times. My most concerning symptom, though, was development of constant, dull head pressure and a clicking/grating/popping noise in my ears/forehead about 50-100 times per day. I felt like I could not think straight, as if there was literally something "blocking" me from focusing and concentrating. I was a straight A college student and graduated top of my class and was on the road to pursuing my graduate degree, so having difficulty with my speech and concentration was very concerning. I stayed at 10 mg for two weeks, waiting for the "side effects" to subside, as everyone assured me they would. They did not, and I went back down to 5 mg. However, decreasing the dose did not diminish any of the side effects I had been experiencing and I felt worse than ever. Every day I felt like I was living in a dream and it took all my energy to understand complex patients concepts at worse that previously were never a problem. After three months, I decided to start weaning off 5 mg with liquid Lexapro. I weaned off very slowly, over 3 more months. As I weaned, occasionally I started to feel a little more "normal" and less "numb." It has been 3 months since getting off Lexapro and Trazodone and my main issue/symptom is that I am having head pressure similar (but more intense) than what I had on Lexapro to some degree every single day. The clicking/popping/grinding noise is also still there and seems to occur any time the pressure changes in my head. The popping doesn't hurt, it's just annoying. The head pressure feels like someone has my head in a vice at all times, but occasionally cranks on it and increases the squeezing sensation. It is unlike anything I have ever felt in my life, and certainly not a normal headache by any means. Whenever I have intense head pressure, I have extreme trouble concentrating, thinking, and focusing similar to what I had while on Lexapro. My other symptom is shakiness and restlessness (trouble sitting still, body feels like it's vibrating). This comes and goes. So, I'm asking you guys....Could I still be in benzo withdrawal or is this probably more related to the Lexapro? I have seen reports of head pressure and weird head sensations from both benzo and AD forums. For those with severe head pressure, when did you start feeling better? Did anyone experience popping or clicking noises in their head? I am concerned because I would like to start graduate school this fall to become a nurse practitioner and I need to be able to think clearly. I feel devastated that I have gone from a highly capable and intelligent person to a depressed insomniac with cognitive impairment. Looking for a silver lining and some encouragement. I've been taking Melatonin and Lemon Balm to help combat the insomnia. Thank you!

I general, how easily do people become dependent on nortriptyline? I really don't want to become dependent on nortriptyline and later have to taper it over months with similar withdrawal symptoms to my benzos. So I would welcome any views on the risks involved in my use of nortriptyline. BACKGROUND: I am taking 10mg nortriptyline to help reduce the terrible head aches and head pressure I have been getting during my taper off benzos. (After 10 years of taking different benzos, I have tapered from 18mg diazepam to 2mg over 20 months.) I may even have to increase the nortriptyline to 15mg or 20mg if my headaches return. I hope to take the 10-15mg nortriptyline for a total time of 6 to 8 months. I have never taken nortriptyline before and the last antidepressant I took was Parnate about 15 years ago. I know from my benzo experience and from hanging out on another benzo board that everyone responds differently but any generalizations would still be useful in helping me decide how to use nortriptyline. Thank you for any advice or information.