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  1. Moderator note: link to benzo thread - Marsx: Am I not taking into account a clonazepam withdrawal? Hello I'm a 28 year old female with a history of anxiety and depression which is mainly caused by severe insomnia persistent since childhood. My insomnia was always my first condition which caused the others. I've been on numerous antidepressants since age 18 being a guinea pig for many psychiatrists over the years. I always felt like crap on antidepressants as I told the doctors I wasn't depressed, just i had severe insomnia. Anyways, for the past 4 years I have been on amitriptyline which was God sent for my insomnia. In hindsight it was just the antihistamines drowsy effect that was helping me. I was on a very high dose of 150mg. Reason is because b4 the amitriptyline I was on Seroquel and again the antihistamine effect and drowsiness put me to sleep and changed my life. But Seroquel was pooping out very fast. I would increase weekly until I was taking 500mg. Finally switched to amitriptyline 150mg and produced the same effect. Was stable on amitriptyline for 4 years until it completely pooped out in helping me sleep. At this point I was tired of all the drugs. I had severe constipation from amitriptyline that caused a bowel obstruction and hospitalization several times and I was sick of it.i was sick of my doctors who were unhelpful. I was sick of my psychiatrists. Everyone sucked. So I completely cold turkeyed off 150mg of amitriptyline. That was 14 months ago to this date. I have been in a living nightmare of suicidal depression along with a host of physical symptoms and brain feeling like it'll explode. Fatigue has been so bad I quit my really good job. I obviously didn't know anything about tapering and thought I was doing the right thing. I hate myself for it. I only got through it telling myself it's just withdrawal and give it one more day. I've been saying one more day for the past year or so and realizing it's not just one more day. Things never got better. I have never been as suicidally depressed as I've been in this past year. My insomnia has not improved in 14 months. I get maybe a max of 5 hours of sleep a week. My hair has fallen out from stress and I'm bald in certain spots. The fatigue has been so bad lately that my body feels it weighs 1000 lbs. I hate my family so I have no support. I finally read about PAWS and realizing how bad my life is and probably won't get better. So I decided to reinstate at 14 months because I simply have no choice. I just can't do it anymore. I can't. I know I can't and I know my only other option besides reinstating and it's not good. So I reinstated at 5mg and I am getting severe tremors. I remember now even trying to reinstate at 4 months in and getting tremors but feeling like the reinstatement helped. The same thing happens when I try Seroquel. In fact when I try a drowsy antihistamine the same thing happens. These tremors are seriously noticible in my face and hands. But otherwise I think the reinstatement helps right away. My entire body is twitching but it almost feels like I'd rather have this then the hell of withdrawal. On a side note I've been doing a lot of research on amitriptyline. I found literature saying it has the same chemical properties as the old antipsychotics which caused people tardive akthesia, taken long enough. It makes sense as all these drugs have a seditative antihistamine in them. I believe it's all connected. I've tried reinstating with Seroquel and the same tremors are appearing but Seroquel also seems to be too much for my system to handle. Ive lost my job. I look like in 50 years old, and just remembering over a year ago I actually still had a joy for life before going off the amitriptyline. QUESTION: checked myself into a psychiatric hospital and obviously they don't recognize paws as a real thing so they suggest ECT therapy for my depression. I'm wondering if anyone has tried ECT for PAWS??? I've never had depression quite like this and it's 100 withdrawal. The physical symptom of brain exploding/burning which I don't know how to explain seems to be the most severe along with being completely bed ridden. I'm willing to do ECT if it helps.
  2. Hello, Everyone here seems really wonderful and pretty knowledgable. I am trying to get off Lithium and Risperidone. But I need to do it safely as I am in college and can't take time off like I would like to. It seems it is hard to get off of these meds for many people. I got the "ok" from my doctor to get off of them, as I was only on them to begin with because of some traumatic things that happened in my life and I needed help adjusting.. however my doctor isn't really practicing anymore it seems.. its impossible to get ahold of her, so I am trying to figure out how to do this on my own. I really feel I am ready to be off of them yet cannot find a clear answer on the web as the how to do it. Can anyone help me? I have a very long history with medications (I was pretty sick for about 10 years.. only some of the meds are listed in my signature, mostly just ones during my worst) and while getting off of them, I never had withdrawals from any of them besides Citalopram. Currently, I am on 4.5mg of Risperidone and have been for a couple of years and I am on 1200mg of Lithium and have been on it for the same amount of time. I'm not sure if weight/height/age matter for getting off medications but in case it does I am 5'2 124lbs and am 24 years old. I would like to know how slowly I have to go off of these in order for it to not really effect much of my life or if I just need to be prepared to feel awful. Also, should I go one at a time? And if so, which medication should I start with? I am also on Amitriptyline. I deal with depression sometimes. Will going off of Lithium and Risperidone effect my mood? Also, when I was sick those years, I lived in a room and never left, it effected me very much. Thats why I am on Lithium and Risperidone now. When I re-entered society, it was pretty scary and created a lot of anxiety. Just having to ask someone a question was so foreign and startling to me that I decided to go on these drugs to help lower my anxiety and urges that I would get because of fear. I have readjusted really well, am doing great in school, finally able to talk to people, and hopefully will soon be able to better make friends, but these medications effect parts of my brain that I think I need. These medications make me feel less and I miss feeling what is around me. My art practice has kind of crumbled since I've been on them. They were helpful when I needed them but as I have said, I just feel it is time to be off of them. However, I am worried that going off will effect my ability to think clearly. I have come across this information in a few different places. But all in all, I just need some advice as to how to get off of these. If anyone has any advice for me about anything I have shared in terms of these medications, why I am on them or what to do to get off of them, I would really appreciate it. As I am worried I will fall back into a bad place if I don't go off of Lithium and Risperidone carefully. And although I don't have many withdrawals, I am very prone to side effects. If you have shared experiences or stories with either of these medications that would help me, please share them with me.
  3. Hi I'm new to the forum. I am having awful trouble coming off Amitriptyline. My doctor is absolutely useless and no help at all. I am currently on 25mg of Amitriptyline. I have been on it for 2.5 years. For irritable bowel syndrome. I have put on a stone in weight, I feel so fat and unhealthy. I have tried 4 times to slowly come off Amitriptyline. But I have really bad side effects when lowering the dosage, even when I go from 25mg down to 20mg I get side effects, I can't sleep and get really anxious that's from just a 5mg drop. I really need help coming off them, because I can't stand being on them any longer. I want to come off them really slowly this time, but I don't know how to start. Can anyone please help. Thanks
  4. Hi everybody, I thought I'd introduce myself, and let you know that I'm going to be starting a weekly withdrawal log to map my progress, support others and hopefully receive support. Below, I've included a few points, and I'll be adding different things as I go on. For now, I wanted to keep it simple and get the ball rolling. Who am I? I'm currently taking 35mg of Amitriptyline for sleep, and as of today (01/01/18), I am starting a very slow taper off the medication. I have taken Amitriptyline since May 2016. Why am I doing this? I've had two withdrawal attempts prior to this, and in my last attempt, I stumbled across this website and realised that it was going to be something of a pilgrimage rather than a quick affair. I've also been interested in writing since I was a kid, and I've recently started up a creative writing practice again and thought that it would be great if I could start capturing my withdrawal journey because it'll hopefully be useful to somebody else in future and also provide me with context and a wider understanding when things start to get tough. My medication history / explaining the situation? I'll try to keep this as short as possible, so I'll use dot points: I have an OCD personality, I enjoy feeling good and things being perfect. I obsessed about sleep a lot. I moved out of home, couldn't control as many variables around sleep and started to get really frustrated when I didn't feel well rested. Cycles of frustration continued for 6 months, before I stopped being able to sleep altogether. This resolved, and was replaced by a 2 - 3am panic attack, being completely unable to fall back asleep. The 2 - 3am rising continued for 4 months, before I started waking 2 hours after falling asleep and being unable to fall back asleep. Tried everything, nothing worked and in my defeat, tried Amitriptyline 30mg. This worked, however the somatic and psychological impacts of the nightly panic attacks and sense of being "broken forever" remained. Withdrawal # 1 I had been taking the medication for about a month, and I was worried about weight gain and felt like a failure for taking it. I was also obsessed with "proving to myself that I could sleep without it now" because I had previously thought I was broken forever. I tried to taper off quickly, using a variety of other sleeping aids to mask the taper. In October 2016, when I had tapered down to about 5 - 10mg, I had a huge panic attack and reinstated, ending the withdrawal attempt. Withdrawal # 2 This withdrawal started in March 2017, when I tried to taper down much more slowly (but not slow enough). I fully came off in October 2017, however due to having family commitments and still working with a high level of anxiety in evenings, I reached my capacity and ended the withdrawal attempt. I reinstated to 35mg because I was so anxious and uncomfortable that I felt like I couldn't relax unless I took a larger dose. What I'd like to achieve? So now that I've had two withdrawal attempts, I realise that the challenge is going to be a combination: The physical and psychological fear of being permanently broken, and unable to sleep again without medication. The physical and psychological fear of feeling tired and how that triggers me. The obsession to feel in control re: sleep, and the fear of relaxing into a sense of flowing with life. The chemical experience of withdrawal. I believe that the process of withdrawing is going to be therapeutic in that it'll trigger each of my fears, and allow me to soothe them directly and rewire my nervous system over the withdrawal period. Hopefully, once I'm fully withdrawn, I would've also cleared out and rewired the triggers around sleeping. Eventually, I would like to be in a position where I am able to relax into the knowing that sometimes I'll sleep well, sometimes I'll sleep badly, and not reject one experience and try to cling to another. What will my taper look like? It's going to be a slow taper, going from 35 -> 32.5 -> 30 etc, in increments of 2.5 per month. I'm aware that I have a limited capacity to approach challenge with composure, so if I need to hold or reinstate, I'm completely comfortable with doing so because this'll be more like a marathon than a sprint and ensuring that I maintain a healthy capacity is going to be key for this. The goal is to feel comfortable at each reduced dose, and spend enough time at each increment that I feel completely confident that I could sleep with this amount. I need to do this, because when I have withdrawn at a quicker rate, I realised that I wasn't certain I could sleep on any of those increments and when I reinstated, I had to go back to the beginning to feel comfortable again. Please note that I'll be sharing more stuff, like the supplements I take, practices I use - for now, I just wanted to keep it simple
  5. WuGang: Hello all

    Hello, I am new to this website. A little about me; I suffer anxiety, panic attacks and was diagnosed depression. Many years ago, when I was around 14-15 years old, I was placed on antidepressants (Seroxat). I was later put on Fluoxetine and Amitriptyline for close to 20 years, I'm now 33. This year I made the decision I didn't want to keep taking these drugs and arranged with my doctor to slowly stop them, one at a time of course. It took a couple of months in total with his instructions. It's now been around 2 months off the Fluoxetine and a month off the Amitriptyline. I have been struggling with the side effects since. On and off sleeping difficulties, wild mood swings, constantly angry and easy to temper, and a really bad temper! Depression. But also, problems with my mind, brain fog, difficulty concentrating. It's really hard to explain, I feel dumber since stopping the meds, I know my mind, know how it works and I can tell it just isn't right. I don't recognize my own mind anymore. I struggle to enjoy anything that I used to, struggle to understand or concentrate on the things I used to like. And to be honest, it's been scaring me, I've been really tempted to go back on the drugs just so that I can be me again. Still struggle with anxiety and panic attacks. Anyway, that's a little about my story.
  6. Hello, I was diagnosed with fibro in 1994. I was just diagnosed by a rheumatologist with CSS - central sensitivity syndrome. A central nervous system disease/disorder that makes people hypersensitive to almost everything. Here are two studies that might be of interest: Fibromyalgia and Overlapping Disorders: The Unifying Concept of Central Sensitivity Syndromes by Muhammad B Yunus, MD -also: clinical review and education- JAMA April 16, 2014 volume 311, number 15 - Fibromyalgia A Clinical Review by Daniel J Clauw, MD. These articles show how the central nervous system plays a huge role in why so many of us have fibromyalgia CFS/ME, MCS-Multiple Chemical Sensitivities, etc. This explains why I've had so much trouble with antidepressants, benzodiazepines, and withdrawals, along with so many other physical and emotional symptoms
  7. Having successfully weaned from gabapentin, I felt ready to begin tapering from duloxetine. Then I found this site, entered my meds & viewed the interaction between them and I feel rather worried and would like help knowing which to leave off first. The ones I'm concerned about are duloxetine, amitriptyline, and trazodone. I also take tizanidine. tia
  8. Very long taper of 2 years coming off Venlafaxine, last dose 22 months ago. Took Amitryptaline for a while to soften symptoms. Still taking 45mgs Mirtazapine. Struggling with depression and anxiety but managing to carry out most everyday functions. Is it normal to be still struggling with these symptoms and should I wait for things to calm down befor I start withdrawing from the Mirtazapine. In touch with the Bristol Tranq. project who are very supportive. Many thanks, keep up the excellent work.
  9. Hi guys, Sigh. I've just screwed up. I'm currently in the long process of withdrawing from Prozac. I also take 60mg amitriprtline at night. Took my dose last night, now this morning wasn't paying attention and just took one of the 10mg amitripyline tablets. So... should I still take my usual dose at night or reduce it by 10mg for one night to compensate? Is this likely to mess up my withdrawal process?
  10. I started tapering from Prozac, 40 mg and Elavil 40 mg in Oct. 2015. I did not know if I could do it. One of my motivations was 3 years of chronic pelvic pain which started while I was on medication. Then all through 2016 I got sick. I spent 2016 in bed, mostly too tired to do very much and the withdrawal from the drugs was one of mostly forgetting to take the medications as I felt sick and had pains and distress, malaise, flu like symptoms In Nov. 2015 I got very dizzy. In Jan. 2016 I noticed that I had electric zaps up and down my spine and inner trembling. I became so weak in August of 2016, I could barely do anything. It felt like I had infections but I never had fever. By Dec. 2016 I had severe pelvic and groin pain. I could barely sit in Jan and Feb 2017. During all this time I felt ill, but not depressed. Today, I started to feel clinical depression coming on. I have seen a neurologist who discounted my symptoms of neuropathy. I notice that anything can trip the inner trembling and inner electric zap feelings on. In the past and recently there were no explanations of gynecological pain (all tests normal) or abdominal pain ( had 2 colonoscopies). I could put up with all the symptoms - but now 17 months after I started - I am really depressed. My nervous system seems to be hyper and reacts to everything with very subtle neuropathic symptoms which the neurologist discounted. I thought about reinstating prozac but I am scared. I was on antidepressants for 20 years and could not discontinue any of them before. This is the first time I made it - but I think I have peripheral neuropathy and I may not be able to reinstate to any antidepressants. I am still seeing my psych doc thinking that I should go back. But would it be safe?
  11. Hello. I'm a 29 year old male. I took 12.5 mg of amitriptyline for six weeks last August for insomnia before having a serious bad reaction to it. I spent the next three months getting it out my system and felt seriously poisoned and generally comatose. I have chronic fatigue syndrome and I was housebound with it but the amitriptyline has left me almost completely bedridden. I feel I've been through the acute stage of withdrawal but the post acute stage seems to be 100 times worse. I've been hit with crushing depression and feel like I cant bear to live another day and just a general feeling of going insane. I've never even expirienced any kind of depression before just insomnia and anxiety. I've lost all my vitality and interest in everything and feel there is no point in being alive but its not me and doesn't feel like an emotion it feels like permanent brain damage. I've been getting slowly weaker since I took the drug and can't even get any kind of panic reaction anymore. It feels like the spark plug in my brain has died and it's absolute hell. My diet has been excellent, eating lots of avocados, walnuts and vegetables and I'm taking all kinds of supplements but nothing is working. I feel like my brain is dying and I'm losing the ability to read and process information and my motivation is completely gone. I can barely eat and lost alot of weight. I'm somehow managing to survive on complete instinct and fighting the urge to kill myself all day. The psychological symptoms started about 2 months ago and started as anhedonia which then progressed into this feeling of complete doom which has got stronger and stronger and now feel completely suicidal. I can't believe what has happened to me. I can't take any other med as I have severe chemical sensitivity and and it will finish me off for sure. Any advice would be much appreciated. I don't want to die really I just want this feeling in my head to go away and just hanging in there praying it goes.
  12. I was put on Amitriptyline originally for migraines. Over a 3 month period I tried 3 different drugs - Amitriptyline 25mg 10 days Topamax (anti-convulsant) 25mg 28 days Pamelor (TCA) 10mg 8 days Amitriptyline 10mg - 20mg maybe a month (they told me I could take 20mg on bad days) Two days after I stopped, I couldn't sleep the entire night. I called my doctor and they said because my dose was so low, it was fine to go off the way I did. I functioned for 3 weeks and then it hit me like the flu. It's been almost 7 weeks since and I have experienced: Muscle spasms Weakness in legs/parasthesia/leg pain Electric sensations which feel like nerve pain in arms and legs Insomnia Body aches (worse in morning) Eye twitches Loss of appetite Light sensitivity - hard to look at anything on phone or computer None of the doctors will acknowledge my health declined after I stopped. I have had so many tests including a trip to Columbia University for a neurological work-up, rheumatological tests, viruses, MRIs, thyroid, Lyme, glucose, etc. I am considering trying Lexapro liquid at 10 and then tapering down to see if it helps any of my symptoms. I am 32 years old and am not really functioning in my daily life. I just opened a business this year so I have to get my life back on track soon! My husband or family doesn't really understand and it makes it so much more stressful! Any thoughts or advice would be greatly appreciated!
  13. Hi, I'm glad to be here, I have been here before, had to do withdrawal way too many times before. I could really use your encouragement and support, I feel so alone, not too many people understand this nightmare. I'm now tapering Abilify, I was on 5mg now Im on 2mg, for almost one year now. Im also on 50mg Amitriptyline and 20 mg buspar. I went on these meds because of a con man pharmacist, that told me I could take high doses of progesterone to help ease withdrawal from a muscle relaxer I was tapering off of. My story is long and complicated, in a nutshell, progesterone in high doses can act as a benzo, with my 20 year history with benzos, that wasn't good. I was on 800mg of progesterone cream. Then I was cold turkeyed off of it,estrogen and the muscle relaxer (zanaflex). I was a complete mess!!! I wound up in the hospital, where they put me on amytriptaline, then later the buspar and abilify. Anyway, Im now tapering the abilify, I feel very anxious,nauseous, morning adrenaline surge and depressed, its horrible! I may have tapered too fast. I have read your posts on tapering to go at a rate of 10% per month. I know all to well about this, with my benzo history and all. I cut the 5mg pill, in half, and was at 2 1/2mg for a couple of months, now Im down to 2mg, been here for about 15 days. Its weird, I had a couple of good windows while on the 2 1/2mg dose, but it was up and down though. Now at this 2mg dose, I'm REALLY struggling. What do you think??? Any advice would be welcome. I know cutting is not the best way to do this. I now have a gemini scale, and plan on taking it down much slower. I would titrate with water, but I don't think abilify is water soluble. I sleep really good, the amytriptaline help with that. I will eventually taper that and the buspar. I don't think buspar has done much for me. Thanks for reading, look forward to hearing from you.
  14. Hi - My 10 yo daughter had acute stomach pain for several months (4/13 start). The GI put her on 25mg Elavil daily (7/29). She took it for 2+ months, but ultimately, it was surgery (9/23) that relieved the pain - they found and clipped an adhesion that was pinning her colon to her abdomen, and removed a normal looking appendix. The doctors won't speculate on which or what caused the pain to start or stop, however. She stopped Elavil 5 days before surgery (9/17) and had a very hard weekend, I didn't realize there would be a withdrawal effect, but her heart was racing (initial EKG was bradycardic and by the end, she was at the very high end of normal) and we were a bit panicked about the drug, and knew surgery was a few days away. As noted, surgery was successful, and she spent a couple easy weeks healing from the laparoscopy. All was great until 10/17: four weeks after stopping Elavil she got some acid and nausea. It is now 12/6 and she has constant heartburn and reflux. She has trouble sleeping, she's nauseous when hungry, refluxing after she eats. GI wants to... try another SSRI! Is it possible she is suffering form something related to the Elavil? Has anyone seen something like this? Many thanks!
  15. I took 10 mg of amitriptiline three times.aftet experienxing side effects I stopped the drug. After a month I am still experiencing muscle twitches and tingling. The doctors think I am crazy and the drug is not the cause. They have proscribed steroids but I am scared to take them thinking these effects might worsen. Help!
  16. We are in Columbus, Ohio and my son's pediatrician doesn't have experience with these brain altering medicines and just seems to know dosages. we are going through a very rough time and have to make a decision about stopping Ami and go through horrible withdrawal symptoms (which he gets as we have tried reducing it just by 10 mg) So i need your advice whatever you can give, please. I don't want to go to another inexperienced doctor. Anyway let me tell you all the details and I am sorry its long one so that you have a whole scenario. it started in a wrong way. The GI doctor couldn't figure out anything and then we had a new pediatrician who immediately diagnosed him with CVS. I wa impressed and did what she asked me to do as my son was third day into his cycle and his high school had started (freshman). She prescribed Ami 50 mg. By the time we got time to read more about it, which my husband and me always do with any new medicine, we already had given one dose to my son. We realized it was a heavy dose to start with but first time we didn't read about a medicine and probably made the biggest mistake. Anyway we still didn't read the white papers etc to know that dosage shouldn't be changed drastically. Next day my son was like a zombie and extremely irritable. So we reduced the dose into half. He was completely recovered from puke cycle the first day itself and after reducing the dose to half he was doing great in every way. We though we found a wonder drug. We confirmed with pediatrician about reducing dosage and she was happy we did! Our happiness lasted only 5 days. 6th day after passing stools (as the cycle always start) he started throwing up a bit and then lot of dry heaving with uncomfortable tummy. Those are his symptoms of CVS every cycle. So we thought its his cycle. It was a weekend so we waited until Monday and called the doctor. Like any other doctor who just know various emergency medicine names, she prescribed imitrex etc. Nothing was helping and by Friday we thought Ami at least is not working, lets stop it. Then I had an idea that 50mg worked,so lets try giving it. And it worked like a charm. Anyway after 2 days again, due to side effects, to make him go to school, we reduced the dose to 40 mg this time. Unfortunately the cycle started again in 5 days, weekend again. We tried giving 50 mg Ami that night and again it worked like a charm. But again we reduced to 40 mg on Monday, due to drowsiness and hadn't still realized that all the cycles since 2 weeks were withdrawal effects of reducing the dosage. This time on 2 days of 40 mg, my son started having urine retention and we reduced the dosage to 30 mg. Somehow while thinking about it that night I realized that previous 2 episodes must be withdrawal effects as I remembered reading people could not stop it. i woke up at night and started reading and was assured they were withdrawal effects. And as expected the next day while he was on 30 mg, the withdrawal effects started. That was last Friday. We thought about it and decided to go 50 mg and stick to it. We read that side effects go away after some time. This time it took 3 days for him to recover from withdrawal effects after starting him back on 50 mg, we still thought its okay. But then 2 days later he started throwing up again and I started wondering what to do. The doctor kept telling us to go cold turkey or reduce drastically. But finally 4 more days later (continuing 50mg), we decided to reduce by 5 mg every week. He is throwing up every morning and canot go to school. He is better later in the evening. But every mornig its horrible. Please help from your experience what do you think we should we do? Can we redcue 5 mg every week since he has had 50 mg for 7-8 days only on a regular basis? Please, please anyone experienced tell me whatever you think we should do.
  17. Over a year ago I was put on this to help with digestive issues, I thought it was helping at first but I think now its causing me issues plus I am trying to get off some medications. My first question is should I wean off? If so what would be an ideal tapering schedule? Any help would be greatly appreciated!
  18. Mea

    Hi guys, Just wanted to introduce myself. After 21 years of being on several types of anti-depressant medications I am determined to completely stop (see history in signature). I am taking 150mg of Effexor at the moment and managed to stop taking it for 8 months last year but the experience was extremely traumatic. I spent about 4-5 months tapering off and then was completely off Effexor for 8 months. Unfortunately I went back on Effexor after the 8 month mark as I was worried about suicide and could literally not function or work or get out of bed. I have never experienced any type of severe depression until this point in my life (2015 when I attempted to go off medication). I didn’t understand what was happening until I found this - https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mad-in-america/201106/now-antidepressant-induced-chronic-depression-has-name-tardive-dysphoria I would be super interested to know of any individuals or moderators on here who have some knowledge or experience in tardive dysphoria/oppositional tolerance. I am hoping there may be someone out there with theories/solutions on how to go off an anti-depressant like Effexor with some sort of support instead of just going off and suffering for years and years until one day you hopefully might start to feel better? I would like to believe that that the neuroplasticity of my brain will definitely get me there eventually but I am really scared after my last experience and not sure how long I could tough it out. At the moment I am looking into st johns wart, saffron, lamictal and transcranial magnetic stimulation. I find Dr Kelly Brogan's work quite fascinating as well although I have already done everything I can nutritionally. She did her fellowship at NYU Medical Center after graduating from Cornell University Medical College, and has a B.S. from MIT in Systems Neuroscience and has some pretty fascinating things to say about antidepressants worsening the long-term course of depression, anti-depressants actually working via being an anti-inflammatory as well as the treatment of depression through nutrition. She has recently released a book but main stream media outlets have basically blacklisted her, likely because of their primary sponsorship by pharmaceutical companies. My aim is to try and go off of Effexor again but I want to have a better strategy in place this time and some sort of back-up plan so I don't panic and go back to Effexor. Last time was pretty traumatizing. Any suggestions, ideas etc are very very welcome!
  19. I have been on and off antidepressants since I was 14 and each time I tried I believed myself to be entirely alone in the effort. I am hugely grateful that I've found this group and have already learned so much reading through these forums. I recently gave birth to the most beautiful little girl in the world. When I learned I was pregnant I tried to go off my wellbutrin and lyrica (for ptsd and chronic pain) cold turkey on the advice of my gynocologist. It was a terrible experience. I completely fell apart and lived in 24/7 panic attack mode. They soon put me back on wellbutrin and replaced lyrica with amitryptoline. I felt so ashamed I couldn't "make it" off meds even for the sake of my unborn child. Now I wonder if it wasn't the withdrawal that had made me feel so terrible? After the birth, my GP suggested I alternate one day on, one day off wellbutrin to wtihdraw -- I've now learned that was terrible advice! At the same time I was tapering off the amitryptoline. I'm now off wellbutrin completely but am still on the lowest dose of amytriptoline. I'd deeply appreciate any thoughts on how to best go off that final 25mg dose. Also might anyone know some good alternative treatments for chronic pain, residing mostly in the shoulders, neck and head?
  20. Hello everybody! And thank you for this forum I have just discovered. I am reading it through but in the meantime I explain my story to you. So, I am Italian leaving in Spain, I am almost 33 and during one of the treatments I I followed to cure my vulvodynia I unfortunately had to take antidepressants (1 year and a half of Laroxyl up to 15 drops I think) and another year and a half of Cymbalta (up to 90mg). None of these antidepressants cured me, they only relieved some symptoms and moreover I began to have side effects, so I decided to quit them at the end of 2014. My neurologist told me to drop from 90 mg to 0 mg of Cymbalta in approx. 6 weeks. I experienced at the beginning a sort of vertigo which slowly went away, together with low mood. I also began having ringing which never went away. After about one month from the suspension, in February 2015 I began feeling inner tremors and shakes, I was feeling always tense and nervous, from when I woke up to when I went to bed. I went to another neurologist explaining my symptons and she referred it as chemical imbalances due to this suspension and she put me on a month on bromazepam, and I was back to normal. I suspended it and I felt the same symptoms again, so we decided to start Lyrica which could help both my anxiety and my chronic pain. Lyrica helped, as the inner tremor and shakes went away, but they returned at the end of November 2015. Desperate I went back to bromazepam and I was a little better, but then I decided I want to get rid of both Lyrica and anxyolitics, so I began to take them away little by little. At some point I felt normal meds free but only for a week as I began to have jaw problems because of my bruxism, and few weeks ago I was diagnosed with disc luxation because of stress/anxiety, so my system activated again with shakes and inner tremors and ever since never deactivated. I began feeling again from the morning to the night inner tremors and shakes, together with ringings and sense of huge tension and stress and this still occurs until now. I know I won't kill or hurt myself but there are times I have thoughts I want my life to be over as I suffer too much and don't have a pause or ever feel relaxed. I forgot to tell i have mutation of Factor V of Leiden and mutation of gene MHTFR. All my doctors (neurologist, psychiatrist, family doctor, cardioligist) refer my symptons as anxiety and that this is my personality and when questioned why I began to felt that way I never felt before, they say that I probably always had anxiety but until that moment my anxiety was blocked by those drugs. They said that antidepressants don't harm the brain ( I did a MRI and that was ok) and that it's not WD as my body already deintoxicated from these substances long ago. I have to say, I am an anxious person and tend to worry about things but I never felt this way. I went on therapy for some years and did improve in many things so I can't explain how I feel now. I don't refer it as something psychological - of course there are some stressors which trigger me and of course I feel stress and anxiety from time to time but not that long and that high- but rather as something physical. Almost nothing except anxyolitics help me, I tried meditation, yoga, mindfulness, relaxing herbs, 5htp, relaxation techniques but I have no relieve. What do you think I suffer from your experience? Anxiety or WD? What is your advice? Is it bad to resist again these symptoms and should i go back to meds or should I give time for my body to heal? And how? It's been 1 year and a half already and it's been a hell... Do you know doctors I can refer to? What should I do? Are there supplements that help our body healing? Thanks a lot for your help, Regards, xxx
  21. Dear friends. I am right now in a very big of a situation. My second daughter is coming into this world due in two weeks and i am as much as a wreck as evere. I had used xanax for on and off very small doses but after two weeks of continuous 0.25 mg usage it seems i got hooked and started to have a lot of anxiety and panic attack. Before that i have had twice problems but i managed to pass them with personal power and sort of other CBT. This time was a bit harder. I Somehow stabilized at start of April on 6 MG Bromazepam and 20 MG Anmitryptiline. After the stabilization i started tapering and failed the first time. The amount went big again up to 6 MG and after a period of 10 days i developed some kind of depression even though i managed to stay at work. Doctor prescribed Remeron 15 MG and i was a bit reluctant to take but i am in a very difficult position right now as my wife is giving birth to my second kid within two weeks and apart from that i have a loan to pay and could not afford to be off so i agreed with the doc to start it. Psychologicaly in the beginning i felt good because with Remeron help i started to make big jumps on the Benzo (Bromazepam) and within 3 weeks i have gone from 6 MG to 0.75 Mg currently. I am still scared though because i have never been on an antidepressant before and there are horror stories all around web about all types of them as well. This is the fourth week i am taking Remeron and is not helping to much with sleep some nights due to my worry thoughts, some more it has side effects (high cholesterol and triglycerides are a trend in my family, me no exception to that) and i am only 40 Years old. There are days when i really feel very bad and hopeless in this situation but somehow manage to push it forward. I need help whether i am doing the right thing and in case yes after i am done with bromazepam most probably in 3-4 days how long should i wait to start tapering Remeron.... One mor thing friends... i have never been depressed for all of my life. OKKKK... i have had difficult moments or periods here and there... but only mild situations. This time the doctore tried to cure me with the reason of my fears.... and i think she failed miserably. Anyway.... i was scared out of proportion after three weeks of xanax and some drinking sessions and all went berserk. Give me some opinions on what should i do???!! Should i wait some days and try taper fast Remeron??? (i will be on them total 4 weeks this tuesday). Maybe i am one of those persons who by chance do not have withdrawals... All the best and keep it tight.... WE WILL PREVAIL.... :-)
  22. Hello, I found this site while checking reviews about supplements sold by another site. Thank the Universe I was compelled to do so, saved myself a lot of $$. Read around a bit and knew that I had come home. In 1992 I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and part of that was insomnia. I was started on 25mg of Amitriptyline and am still on that same dose today. However, life happened and the pain and everything made me depressed. Over the years I went from one anti depressant to another, and the Wellbutrin was the last. I stopped taking it cold turkey, never thought twice about it and had no side effects (that I recognized!) I am not sure how it is I was so oblivious, as I am usually a very inquisitive person and am constantly researching and reading about anything. ​Maybe a light bulb went on because of what's been happening slowly over the past 6 months. All changes from one to the next went OK, stopped and started one after another. Until I was only on the Amitriptyline again. Then I had sleep issues again, and a doctor suggested Klonopin. He did not think I should have Xanax. In fact, he dropped it and I did go through a few weeks of tense emotions. The Klonopin was offered long after. This doctor allowed me to be on Hydrocodone, 2 ea of 10/325. Then my insurance changed and the next doctor fussed a bit, then OK'd it, but after a year she dropped me, because she thought I was doctor shopping. (I had a root canal and an extraction, each cost me many $$, and certainly not worth getting 16 5/325 Vicodin for) I had to look for another doctor, and this one refused to give me the pain medication. What she did is had me withdraw unsupervised and way too fast. This all gives me great hope that I will make it through my current journey. My wings have been clipped, and I am not liking this at all. This last doctor who took my pain meds away wanted to start me on Lyrica, I refused, knowing is causes weight gain, a fact that is actually well known. Unfortunately I allowed her to talk me into taking Cymbalta, which can also cause weight gain, especially once partnered with the Amitriptyline and Klonopin. Wings were growing back, but the added weight in the past 6 months has made it almost impossible to move, let alone fly.... Around Christmas I had Pneumonia, but it would not go away, so I asked for a chest x-ray, on the 1 year anniversary of quitting smoking. Findings were an enlarged heart and a partially collapsed lung. And the letter read that we'd discuss in 3 months at the next appointment........ Long story short, I called to talk to her, to learn she was gone for a month. I was so angry - so I asked to see a different doctor, one I had seen before, and he has great bedside manners! Ultrasound revealed heart is OK, not sure about the lungs, but the coughing and wheezing is pretty much gone now. I quit seeing that woman and switched - and on my 1st official appointment, I took my meds with with me and one by one I asked questions, and he told me the truth, and we made a plan. maybe his plan is possible, we shall see. Based on past experience, I apparently can handle withdrawals. But I do not want to travel this journey alone, so I am glad I found all of you. We also agreed on dropping the Amitriptyline and he told me about Klonopin causing Dementia and Alzheimer's, and he encouraged me to let that go, too. I told him that I was no longer taking Buspar, it was not working, I kept forgetting to take it (for anxiety) and it did nothing for/to me. I only took it for a week or so) I started tapering on Monday 21st of March. The night from the 24th to the 25th I had a bad dream, woke up with heart palpitations, checked it and was at 135 heart rate. oops. very odd feelings. I recalled reading about settling these effect by taking a Benzo - so I did. It helped. I have re-set my game plan to get off Cymbalta and Amitriptyline first. The Klonopin next. For sleep I was given Trazadone. But I am looking for natural ways to get me sleepy and sleeping again. Now, all my reading the past few days has shown that many experience a great range of symptoms, either while still on the drugs or as they are withdrawing. I felt it might be safe to stick with folks who understand and I can learn so much from you. My goal is to bring the Phoenix back to life - to find that part that I lost again, all the while losing a few pounds - especially what I gained the past 6 months, rendering me useless (in my opinion) and I will not live like this any longer. It's dangerous too, as I fall and have hurt myself, not good. I am committed to success using as many natural tools as I can. Am on supplements now and notice how much better I feel already. Thanks for reading this. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/11690-ingridphoenix-i-want-to-fly-again/
  23. Bonjour je écris de France Je suis laroxyl sous 6 gouttes DEPUIS 2 ans. J'ai Commencer le sevrage en Janvier of this year with a% de 5 au départ et là je suis à 4% TOUS les 15 jours. Je dirais qu'actuellement Tous vas bien, Mis à part Quelques Problèmes gastriques Mais rien Qui m'empêche de continuateur d'avancer. Je aimerais Connaître réellement La Demie-vie of this molécule et combien de temps reste t'elle dans l'organisme ?? Merci à vous ______________________________ Translation to English via Google: Hello I am writing to France I laroxyl under 6 drops SINCE 2 years. I Begin the withdrawal in January of this year with a 5 % of departing and here I am to 4% ALL 15 days. I would say that at present all are well, apart from some stomach problems but nothing stops me from moving forward. I 'd really like to know The Half- life of this molecule and how long it remains in the body you ?? thank you
  24. I'm so glad to have found this forum, I think this is just what I need to finally get free of the tricyclics that I've been on for most of my life. It's really amazing to me that I've actually been on drugs for so long, without any really serious attempt to break free until last June. I always assumed that I could get off it fairly easily if I wanted to, after all, I had missed a night or two now and then, and aside from disturbed sleep and sweats, it was totally bearable. I didn't really get the fact that I wasn't going to get the real effects of withdrawal until I was about a week out. Then the s*** really hits the fan. Amitryptiline was my way of dealing with low-grade depression, and the 4 o'clockies that came along with that. A few years ago I started dealing with perimenopause, and the insomnia issues become much more severe. Eventually I started on progesterone, which was a godsend for me, and my depression has completely lifted. At the beginning of last year I got very serious about the insomnia issue, and getting very healthy in all ways--the list of things I have done for insomnia could fill a book. Suffice it to say that I'm very healthy otherwise (great diet, sleep hygiene, etc..) and I'm tired of being on this drug! I know it is messing with my blood sugar and interacting with the hormones. I've got to simplify things. In June I made my first real attempt to get off. I was only taking 6 mg. at the time, so I naively thought jumping off would be fairly easy. The first week wasn't bad, just light-headed and spacy, a bit of an upset stomach. But by week two, my stomach was in a total uproar, insomnia came back with a vengeance, and I started to feel positively ill. Then I finally did some research and realized this was not going to be easy. I have some experience with tapering off of a benzo, so I know the principles. Can believe I was so clueless! I bounced my dosage up and down for years, never really understanding what I was doing to my body. Currently I'm on 12.5 mg. amitryptiline. My sleep is still very unsettled with the hormone changes and addition of estrogen. I'm going to try to stabilize and get my sleep settled, on the estrogen for a while longer, as the sleep I do get is much better quality (very deep and restful). If I can't (too much reliance on sleeping pills) I'll have to drop the estrogen and reevaluate. Once I am stabilized my plan is to start a very slow taper. I figure it will probably take about a year. If anyone has feedback on this plan, or familiarity with a tricyclic taper, I'd love to hear from them! The idea of finally being drug free is very exciting to me.
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