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Found 9 results

  1. Hi all , I am 8 months off reinstated sertraline for a month ( by doc) and Aripropazole. History Its around 4 years back when i passed out my college and not get placed even after making to finals in many interviews .. that i decided to write competitive exam for PG. I had taken coaching but just before exam I came back and found myself unable to recall things. My brain is just like nothing in it. I found myself in despair and stopped studying. This fog is happening all the time since my engineering but I managed to get average marks sometimes and sometimes very good . There is more in back history but I ll get to it later. So, my parents took me to a psychiatrist ( family known) and he put me to Olanzapine and one more thing. He diganosed me bipolar2. I got about 10 pounds on it but its not help . Meanwhile after 4 months, with the help of a relative , I got intern in a company and I moved out with fog to a distant city. TThere in a hospital, they put me on floxetine and Amisulpride for 3 months . Then i moved to a private psychiatrist ... where it starts getting haywire . He stopped fluoxetine and Amisulpride . And put me on Venlafaxine and Seroquel... As i was interning, i get usual heat racing in between job times but my doctor convinced me to stay with it . 4 months and I just started feeling agitated due to stress. It happened that I slapped a senior on abusing me and there I left a job I never happened to get physical in my school or college .. but it happened. Doctor told me to scrap the prescription he wrote of raising Venlafaxine. And he put me paroxetine + Oxcarbazepine. In his words , it is best tolerable and has lesser side effects. I managed to get a job by my own and cracking first time. But this time there is lot of work and culture pressure. Its a startup with full of politics . Boss and his boss .. all keep on putting things. Let office aside, I started feeling some well .. overly casual ... excited .. raged .. Iits about 25 mg Paroxetine and 300/600 mg Oxcarbazepine. I had unusual violent acts .. had hit a school friend .. insomnia.. I decided to leave the paxil by asking the doctor . He said half in a week and then other half a week to off. Thats when it all started , i cannot sleep whole night and with day light i start getting a nap. I left going office with fear of state i was in . I cannot wake and even if I .. i was too tired and angry . Doctor then gave me Mirtazapine which didn't help . I resigned job telling muly boss about all and came back home. It was Nov,2015. I start getting yhese uncontrollable rage that I locked myself in a room. Parents took to a local shrink who put me on Venlafaxine+ Mirtazapine(CRF), lamotrigine, resperidal, Seroquel. The NEXT Day I woke up so fresh .. all calm like 12 yrs back .. i was smiling happy.. but it lasted only 4 hrs .. and i am doomed again . I took those meds 10 days and i decided to go off. Physical Damage. I got brain zaps as sounds with eye movement .. While on Paxil I got severe neck stiffness and movement pains - which came out as Osteophytes. Anger , heart race , memory, fog , chest pains , fatigue ... All I beared for 4 months. Reinstatement after 4 months. Father took me to another psych who put me on Sertraline+ Aripropazole+ Seroquel. I started having increases restless legs than before and the doctor asked me not to go over net. After 2 visits and when he said it wslas Aripropazole for restlessness all time.. and he is cutting it . I stopped all meds . Withdrawals in 8 months. All first symptoms with some new like utter sensitivity in teeth. It is while breathe in most of the teeth . Muscles gone from forearms .. My left hands gone ulnar neuropathy and i got surgery done when no hope lived. Right hand has stiffness too . MAnger I am living with .. I have stopped talking .. I have decided to go sit on my Shop but I was unable to understand the talk . In spite anger biuts and memory makes it difficult to adjust. I keep forgetting people faces .. important talks . So i stopped . Now I am muted all the time with burst inside . Read success stories and play CoC. This is the most I can write now.
  2. With the help of my doctor I reduced my prozac (40mg per day) very slowly over a year and stopped about a month ago. I am getting terrible feelings of anger, can be abusive to loved ones. I am also finding it difficult to relax. I am getting other symptoms but can deal with them. Am I alone with these feelings of anger. I do not want to go on to additional medication. Feeling desperate.
  3. Seriously, why? I feel like I'm naturally an ******* and I have to fake it to make it, all day every day around 99.99% of the people I meet because I can't stand 99.99% of the people on this planet. I'm on Escitalopram 10mg/day for anxiety and 1mg of ativan to take if I have a panic attack. I have now successfully been fired or quit from my last 4 jobs due to going off the handle on someone about something. It always starts with someone telling me what to do or telling me that I'm wrong. While that starts to annoy me, it's not really the issue of trying to show me how to do something right, and point out what I did wrong, it's the fact that they come off as a complete d*ck about the subject with a poor, aggressive, condescending, talk-down-to-me-attitude pretty much begging me to react in a demeaning manner. I can't stand being told what to do when it's done poorly in such a rude way and I can't stand being talked down to as if they're some how better than me. My wife tells me to grin and bear it no matter what and my only response is I can't; because I will not tolerate being treated that way and if they want to talk to me the way they do, I'll push back until they stop pushing, which 5/5 times results in getting fired. I feel like a sociopath trying to live a normal life, because I tend not to give a **** about how I treat anybody once they wrong me. A normal person like my wife would just walk away, laugh, ignore, or run and tell at her work with the things that happen to me on a daily basis at work, I on the other hand however feel the need to flip **** and get the last word in, no matter what it takes. I guess I'll have to tell this to my counselor when I see him again, because things were going great at this last job and I had one instance and flipped out on one of the workers and got canned. I just suck at life.
  4. Hello, My name is Cathy and I live in Minnesota. I have a long history of depression, numerous meds, ECT, a study for VNS, a study for genotypes, etc. Typically I would get into more detail but it hurts too much to type. I started Nardil about 7-8 weeks ago and was on a steady 60 mg. dose for at least five weeks. Early on I started developing "carpal tunnel" type symptoms. I had done a short MAO trial in the late 80s and remembered when I was on one, I had almost had carpal tunnel surgery. I went off the MAO for other reasons and the symptoms all went away, prior to surgery fortunately. I later learned that Nardil depletes B6. When my symptoms started this time, I began adding in B6. I was not sleeping well, often up til 4 or 5 am unless I took Trazadone, in which case I would sleep until 4 or 5 pm. About two weeks ago, I started getting more fidgety, restless legs, etc (the insomnia was different from what I typically have--if I can't sleep it is usually because my brain will not shut off. This insomnia was as if my body did not want to go to sleep--tossing, turning, etc. My back and neck started becoming tighter too--I am a typical type A, first born, Taurus, former lawyer--so they are usually tight to begin with. This was worse. With insomnia, restlessness, etc. I stayed up and did a lot of housework, cleaning the basement, cleaning the garage, etc. Somewhere along the way, my shoulders, neck, arms, and hands developed excruciating pain. The hands were typical neuropathy symptoms. I could not drive or type. I used heat, ice, lots of Ibuprofen, Naproxen, Tylenol, and even some old celebrex. I did gentle stretches. I had chiropractic. Nothing helped. I went to urgent care and was given muscle relaxers (one that was safe with an MAO) and a referral to physical therapy. Those did not help either. All in all, I think the symptoms were due to pyridoxine depletion (my nerves were probably more prone to damage--recovered alcoholic who had footdrop--although the college incident makes me wonder if I am just low on B6 to start with), a lack of sleep (thus no healing), and the added movements and tension. I am still experiencing the neck and hand pain. It is a little better now, thus the typing. However, in the last few days, it has been to the point where I can't even move my fingers. I am now going off Nardil. I feel more depressed, angry, irritated, jumpy, fidgety, extremely restless, tired but not sleepy, and in general, bad all over. I am not sure when the use symptoms overlap with the withdrawal symptoms. Typically I do not have much for withdrawal symptoms, but this sucks. I did read the advice--keep it simple and stable and taper slowly. Right now I am about one step away from checking in to the hospital--but it is the weekend and the holiday on Monday. Plus once I get there, I will have wished I stayed home. Just looking for support and understanding. My fiancee (provided our relationship makes it thru this) does not really get depression or meds. He tries, but his understanding of it is limited. Thank you, Cathy
  5. Can missing your sertraline for 3 days cause a delayed withdrawal effect a couple of weeks later? Has anyone else experienced hypnogogic jerks combined with gibberish-like exclamations that sound like words but are just wordlike noises? And not just a short yell, like a sentence of gibberish that seems like it's an attempt to communicate something but the words don't form. I can't tell if these reactions are to do with messing up my pill intake, or if they're a symptom of repressed anger bubbling up when I start to lose concsiousness. During the day, i've been trying to be mindful of my anger and not repress it or distract myself, and it's meant that i spend most of the day feeling angry. Occasionally if something particularly frustrating happens, I find myself involuntarily twitching and having to stop myself from shouting/swearing, It feels very similar to the thing happening at night, just I have more conscious control over myself when I'm wide awake. So what I'm trying to figure out is, is this a symptom of missing my pills for a few days semi-recently, or is it a consequence of unrepressing feelings?
  6. Need strong catharsis

    Not a classic self care/symptom, but felt it fit in this section regardless. Long story short, I'm so incredibly angry to my core that my life is in shambles and that I'm in agony everyday. It's made me depressed and suicidal. Historically, I'd vent whatever anger I had through physical activity, but in my present state exercise is not really an option, as it would just make symptoms worse. Things like meditation, yoga, etc. are fine and good, but not cathartic. I really need a way to release this bottled up anger. I (figuratively, please don't read this literally, I'm not violent) want to kill something because I'm so angry, but obviously my anger has no target. I don't know what to do. My anger leads me to be depressed and ruminating, and fills me with self hate and hate for my life. I hate myself for not being able to give up and kill myself (although I've been close). So much anger, how do other people deal with it? It's not like withdrawal, this drug, or my anger are leaving soon.
  7. We are helping our daughter, 21, through withdrawal from Zoloft. She had a manic event that peaked approximately 2 weeks ago. She was on Zoloft, for approximately 8 months, starting at 150mg, and down to 100mg. She started taking the Zoloft irregularly, we believe precipitating the event. She was admitted into a psychiatric ward in the city where she lived, and based on the manic symptoms (racing speech, delusional theories, looping over the same topics), they began to treat her for bipolar disorder. She was in the ward for approximately 9 days, and received everything from Olanzapine, Lithium, Ativan/lorazepam, haldol, benzocaine, benadryl and klonopin... She had adverse reactions to all of them (hot/cold chills, swollen tongue, eczema, racing pulse), and she refused to take any more meds. We got her out of the psych ward, and brought her home to where we live outside of Boston. Unfortunately, since any licensed psychiatrist would immediately diagnose her as bipolar again, and put her back into inpatient, we have treat her at home, alone, and cold turkey. When we brought her home, she was coming of 2mg of lorazepam and was still manic (though nowhere nearly as badly as earlier). That night she slept for 10 hours. The following day, the rapid speech was still present, but reduced. However, she could not sleep and spent the entire night talking and pacing. The next day the rapid speech slowed even more, pacing was absent, and she got a good nights sleep. This morning however, she went exhibited severe anger/rage and pacing returned. She also started experiencing hot and cold chills. We are giving her vitamin supplements, including zinc, magnesium, iron and omega 3. We have been avoiding tylenol, and caffeine, though she insisted on coffee this am. We are also avoiding breads, pasta, sugars, etc. Questions. Is this pattern typical? How long does each of the cycles last? Can we expect rapid cycling to continue? Does anyone know how long this rapid cycling will continue. Are there any other supplements or techniques we should consider for managing these cycles. I have taken her for walks on the first two days (about 2 miles each). Any practical guidance will be appreciated on these topics.
  8. Eight years ago I started taking prozac 20mg, over the next four years this was increased to 60mg. Over the next few years I made a couple of doctor supervised reductions back down to 20mg. This summer I tapered off over just a couple of months (now been off it for 2.5 months). Since then I feel more motivated and alert, which is great. I definitely don't feel that I am suffering from depression any more (woo hoo!). The problems have been in managing my emotions. I get very angry very easily, things that a few months ago would have been mildly irritating are now causing me such anger. I have some issues with being angry that I need to deal with, when I get angry I feel like a monster. I realise that I have to learn to not feel bad about myself for getting angry and I'm going to seek help for managing my response to feeling anger but that doesn't help right now. It's starting to bum me out so hard, when I feel that rush of rage it makes me feel like a terrible person because I know the anger is put of proportion to the situation. I then want to hurt myself, which I haven't felt like doing in so long, it feels like going backwards. I'm also really struggling to stay asleep. No matter when I go to bed or how much sleep I get if something disturbs me I am just awake and cannot get back to sleep. It's beginning to have a real impact on my emotions and work (thankfully I work from home so I don't have to deal with bosses or anything and I can adapt my hours to suit how I'm feeling though). I really thought for a while that I was just a terrible, terrible person. I cannot tell you what a relief it was to find this site and know that I'm not alone (although in some ways it's heartbreaking how many people are going through the same thing), when I read about neuro emotions and the experiences of some folk with anger it honestly made me cry with relief! I am going to seek help for managing my reaction to getting angry and I really want to try and improve my diet (for a lot of reasons but mainly to see if it help with this!). Thank you so much to the creators of this site and everyone who has shared what they're going through, it has made a real difference in my life just knowing that I'm not alone or just a horrible person.
  9. I started tapering off my Lexapro (20 mgs) in mid-December. About halfway through my tapering off from Lexapro a few weeks ago, I noticed that I was getting *very* angry within a few hours of taking it. I suppose I am an angry person by nature and having 5 y.o. twins with a mostly absent father isn't helping things. But I noticed that when I didn't take the Lexapro, I was more easily able to control my temper. As I said, I have young twins, so I had to stop the taper halfway through my plan and go cold turkey off the Lexapro because things were getting too intense with the kids. I've been off the Lex completely for a week and it's noticeably easier to control my rage (except for being exhausted from a viral infection with no rest breaks). Has anyone else noticed that problem when tapering off of Lexapro? It's hard to find a *good* list of examples of what one can expect from tapering off of various meds and what folks do to work through them.
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