I am now in my seventh month of protracted withdrawal syndrome (I had to go cold turkey because of sub-acute serotonin syndrome --mostly parkinsonism and brain fog erupting into a lethal level of high blood pressure and analphylaxis -- new one!). I am now worse than I was last winter when I was bedridden.
Biggest problems all center around my autonomic nervous system -- sleeping, eating, blood pressure, neuropathies, as well as a deep depression. Of course, I have had a lifetime of major depressive disorder -- but I really fought my way through it. I was fun, funny, and high achieving! I am now for the first time emotionally numb (can't even cry). For the past ten years I was depressed and on increasing doses of meds (why I am here) but got by (and actually excelled at some things, like my teaching) until I became ill. I am now on disability and can't imagine working again.
I had been obsessed with suicide for several months. Can't do it -- I have a beautiful adult son and a loving husband. I also have a lovely home I now can barely leave. So the big question is, how do people experiencing this find hope, strength, things they can do, and and a life to live?
I also feel so shunned -- by friends and even doctors! Have some great stalwarts by my side, but I really can't do much now. My life has turned into the couch for the most part
I would so appreciate encouraging and kind words! (Silver lining -- my new appreciation for kind, good people!)