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Until I was 30 years old I had never put an antidepressant in my mouth. I had a normal life. I studied, graduated, dated, got married, etc., etc. Since I was a child, I've always been a little anxious/worried. When I was young, I had some difficulty sleeping. I also had gastritis due to anxiety, but nothing more than that. I never resorted to medication, even though I faced many traumas (my father's death, problems with my mother that made me move in with my grandmother, etc.). However, I started taking Lexapro 20 mg from 2010 until 2017 to treat classic depression caused by a disease that no one discovered and that made me feel a lot of pain. In 2017, after many bad episodes, notably my son's diagnosis with a serious illness, Lexapro was no longer effective. I started to feel scared, depressed, with back pain and anxious. I was afraid that my eldest son would also be diagnosed with the same disease. Now I question whether the exacerbation of these symptoms was not a result of Lexapro itself. WE WILL NEVER KNOW. The fact is that the doctor - in 2017 - switched to CYMBALTA 60 mg and I reacted VERY WELL. I even got through traumatic episodes, like the sudden death of my grandmother - which for me was everything in life, as she was the one who raised me - and everything went very well. The only annoying effect was dizziness when standing up. I actually fainted a few times because of it. In one of them I even had to get stitches in my head. Anyway, everything was going very well until the episode occurred in May/2023, in which I was fired by my friend, who suggested that I had committed a crime in 2016. After what happened, I became very depressed, I didn't want to get out of bed, a feeling of injustice, difficulty waking up, etc., but I was still able to do normal activities. Early July 2023 - when I was much better and didn't feel any of the symptoms I'm experiencing now - I went back to the doctor, who decided, don't ask me why, to increase the DUAL to 90mg. About 2 weeks after starting the new dose, the monster that now plagues my life began to be born. After seeing a news story saying that a certain person had been convicted for an event that had occurred 6 years ago even though he was innocent, I began to feel afraid that the suggestion made by the monster who fired me could come true, despite there being no factual-logical support. for that. From then on, I believe that due to the increase in medication, I began to feel anguish I had never experienced before - and which I later discovered was not that bad as I would feel much worse. But, as it was something new for me, I was very scared and, after contacting the doctor, I was prescribed Pristiq 50 + 0.25 Rexulti. I argued that I didn't want to take two medications. Because of this, she told me to just take pristiq. After about a week, I felt much better and thought everything was over. A few days later, however, the symptoms of anxiety/distress and intrusive thoughts returned. Therefore, we switched to 100 mg of pristiq associated, at my suggestion, with cannabis extract. However, the medication (Green Care 79.14 mg/ml) caused me 2 panic attacks. I was traumatized by these two events and permanently stopped taking THC. For the first time in over a decade, I had to take a Xanax to calm down. However, without any change of medication, the anxiety began to return very strongly, to the point of almost preventing normal activities from being carried out. Even so, it was possible to tolerate the symptoms with GREAT DISCOMFORT. Upon returning to the doctor's office, I reported the worsening of symptoms and the Pristiq dose was increased to 150 mg, this time associated with half a Rexulti tablet (0.25). As I was very fragile and wanted to improve, I accepted the association with the antipsychotic. About 1 week later, my symptoms improved and I thought that, this time, things would go well. After 1 or 2 weeks I felt good - although a little accelerated. However, at the end of November/2023 I started to feel very anxious, accelerated and distressed, which caused a terrible cycle of thoughts. They were very uncomfortable symptoms that were slowly destroying me. I even had a kind of panic attack, but I resisted without taking Xanax. I was anxious for almost the entire day, but I refused to speak up for fear of more problems. Mysteriously, all these symptoms diminished greatly during the night, so that, as far as possible, it was possible to sleep well, despite being very distressed during the morning and afternoon. Well, after this episode I went back to the office. Seeing my condition, the doctor decided to replace the 150 mg of Pristiq with 20 mg of Lexapro with the removal of 0.25 mg of Rexulti. In the first week after withdrawing from Pristiq, it felt like something bad had come out of me. From 11/21 until 11/28 the symptoms decreased until they almost disappeared. I was quite happy. I thought I had discovered what caused all this and that there would be a happy ending soon. But there was no time to celebrate. On 11/29/23, 8 days after withdrawing from Pristiq and starting Lexapro, the anguish returned in a brutal and overwhelming way. So great and intense that the desire to kill oneself appeared as the only option to end the suffering. I had never felt this before. Therefore, it is obvious that the medication was to blame. From 11/29 onwards, my real downfall began. Despite the ups and downs, before that, I was able to go for my daily run, work and have leisure time. From then on, no more. After 11/29 I have certainly been facing the worst phase of my life. If I weren't working remotely, I would have to take time away from activities. From that date on, I completely abandoned the faith that had helped me so much in the past and my life became a distressing struggle for survival. From being a fervent Catholic with a daily rosary, I no longer had the strength to continue. It was my wedding anniversary and I couldn't go out to dinner with my wife, just to give an example. I was completely dysfunctional. Many times I couldn't even take my children to school or go to the supermarket. He was in a daily hell that seemed to have no end other than taking his own life. The days that followed were terrible. During this period, I was forced to take xanax every day (I only took it once a day, but if I could, I would take it every 3 hours), such was the anguish. I had never felt anything close to that. Not even Doistoevksi, or perhaps only he, could faithfully describe the overwhelming feelings that invaded my soul. On December 7th, due to my terrible condition, the doctor suggested that I take ketamine sessions and add 0.5 of Rexulti to the 20mg of Lexapro. From then on I had ups and downs. After the first two ketamine sessions I thought I was cured and that everything was over. I was wrong. After a few days of improvement, I began to worsen dramatically with terrible anxiety and panic, as well as intrusive thoughts. On 1/8/24, in a new consultation, the doctor decided to maintain Lexapro 20 mg and maintain 0.5 of Rexulti. That same day, I went on vacation with my family and had the worst vacation of my life. Catastrophic thoughts accompanied me at all times. I was already waking up with a LOT of fear and panic. I spent the whole day like this, with the same thought circulating and plaguing my mind. I went to the beach with atrocious difficulty. Every 5 minutes, throughout the day and afternoon, I had to relive what happened to tell myself that there was no reason to worry, that it was just the thought of a crazy person, etc., etc., all of this surrounded by a lot of fear, anguish and panic. At night, there was a little relief and, I don't know how, I was able to sleep well. But I woke up the next day in absolute panic. It was a nightmare. Upon returning from vacation, on January 22, 2024, in complete despair, I went to another doctor. He said that I had symptoms similar to those of OCD and ordered me to keep the Lexapro, remove the 0.5 of Rexulti and take Luvox 50mg for 3 days, then switch to 100. In the first three days I noticed that the intrusive thoughts decreased. Given this, he asked to maintain the 50mg, in addition to the 20mg of Lexapro. From the fourth day onwards, however, despite the thoughts having reduced, the anguish/panic increased a lot again and came in a BRUTAL and OVERWHELMING way. I had terrible episodes for about 10 days, where I really wanted to kill myself to end the pain. I woke up with a feeling so bad I couldn't describe it. I even fainted on two occasions. I couldn't carry out everyday activities, like going to the supermarket or taking my children to play soccer. I had never felt anything like this. Doctor gave Buspirone but it was like water. Therefore, he told me to take Xanax 3x a day, in addition to the other medications. Afraid of the effects of benzos, he took xanax only when the anguish was unbearable and tried to live in anguish at all times, without respite. Then, in desperation, I asked the doctor to remove the Lexapro - because I thought it was causing the symptoms. On 02/02/2024, he ordered 5 days of Lexapro 10mg and then withdrawn, he kept 50mg of Luvox and started Elavil 25 (should go to 75 mg in 5 days) and Lithium 600 (2x of 300). The day after taking 25 mg of Amytril, on February 3, 2024, I felt better. I was very happy because I didn't wake up in a panic and I didn't feel like throwing myself out the window, something that had been with me in the last few months. But my general condition continued to be poor. From then on, very slowly, I gradually improved. It wasn't great, but I stopped wanting to die. Given the improvement, the doctor asked to keep Elavil at 25 mg. I suggested that he reduce/remove Luvox but was ignored. I thought it might have effects from completely withdrawing from Lexapro but it didn't get any worse. At an appointment on 2/22/2024 with another doctor, I was in a simply reasonable state. Still very traumatized by everything I suffered and went through, but without that anguish and panic that paralyzed me and left me wanting to die (and sometimes to kill myself, which scared me a lot). As for the thoughts that I would be reported, etc., they came many times a day, but without panic or anguish. But it was much better than my previous state. I was very happy with your new doctor's line of thinking - who also understood that most of the terrible symptoms I suffered stemmed - not from my condition - but from the medications. I reminded the doctor that I was flooded with a sea of serotonin and norepinephrine (I was prescribed an incredible 150 mg of Pristiq + 0.25 of Rexulti, then 20 mg of Lexapro + 0.5 of Rexulti, and finally 20 mg of Lexapro, + 50 mg of Luvox). One of the doctors even commented that we could increase Lexapro to 40 mg!!!! My perception is that what made me improve was Lithium. After 2 weeks of taking the mineral, I had a good improvement considering my previous condition. The effect of 25 mg Elavil was also impressive, as I took it at night and, the next morning, I didn't wake up in despair. As for Luvox, I honestly think it does me more harm than good. I remind friends who read me that I am one of the many cases in which the patient presents a small complaint and is devastated a few months later by the medications. If the medication starts to cause unwanted effects, the standard medical approach is to always increase the dose, and never take out the medication. It's insane. The new doctor ordered dozens of tests, including genetic ones, and authorized the reduction of Luxox to 25 mg. I've been on the new dose for 15 days and I'm still doing it - not very well - but simply stable. He also said that our target is to remove everything ( AMEN). He also said - unlike the previous doctor - that I don't have OCD, just a persistent intrusive thought. I remember never feeling anything like that. I never had thoughts that tormented me day and night. I remember never feeling anything like that. I never had thoughts that tormented me day and night. This is yet another indication that this all happened due to the different drugs I was put on. The thoughts that I could be accused of something - despite having done nothing - appear all the time, but without the panic like before. Today, 8/3/24, I am taking low doses of three medications: 25 mg of Elavil 25 mg of Luvox 600 mg of Lithium, The first withdrawal occurred. 15 days ago I reduced Luvox from 50 to 25. Because of all this, here I am, looking for everyone's help to, little by little and very carefully - after all, I am very traumatized by what I went through and felt - remove these medications from my life and get out of this nightmare I have been going through. Thanks and sorry for the bad english.

Hi fam- so I’ve just turned 32 after what’s seemed like a decades-long book of a psychiatric journey. At age 13 I was admitted to the hospital for severe depression. My family decided to perform an intervention to get me out of bed and into the hospital, due to not being at a place to deal with the conflict. My mother a neurologist, father an endocrinologist, and to-be-doctor sister at the time, failed to intend to resolve the issue outside of psychiatric means. So I was put on Zoloft… my first medication in a line of maybe 15+ drugs that Ive had a regimen for in my life. But I come to this forum nearly 20 years later and realize what my journey has been like, my yearning to get back to who that passionate individual was, superseding all bounds of the medicinal chaos that entrapped me for most of my life. but I’ve found good structure in my life as of late. Past all the suicidal years in my late teenage and early-to-mid 20s. I started a family, with a wonderfully empathetic wife who supports me in my journey. I had met her having gone Cold Turkey for a complete stint of two years before … more trauma. we lost our baby boy in March ‘21 during a traumatic uterine rupture. God bless him. three months after, my rage knew no bounds and I ended up striking my wife.. and I ended up hospitalized after a suicide attempt… the last in the line of 6 attempts throughout life. I was then out into an IOP program, the fourth time I have participated in one so my skills were really in for polishing. I remember being the “wise” one by my peers and even the mediators themselves. All in all I picked up my toolkit, for helping in my structure in many ways. I have no regrets here. my life has become pretty stable, with the vraylar since then, along with the time old and tested Lamictal that I take to feel that so-called “mental clarity” of my 20s. I take 10mg of amphetamine to abide by the demands of working in a high-paced IT consultant gig. It does its tricks, but makes me feel like a token minority (indian, here) and like I live up to fewer merits without it. So it needs to go. Eventually. But my diagnosis of ADHD inattentive-type is pretty seriously affecting me and need to cope with it as best as I can. I rationalize this with taking the low dose and having deliberately open conversations around this and all my drugs with my psychiatrist. He’s supportive of me looking into tapering which is nice. so I want to start with vraylar and lamotrigine subsequently. I think my bipolar diagnosis can go to hell, just like when we threw out borderline personality disorder. Hell, I’m not even feeling like I’m up to dealing with them stigmatized labels anymore like being inattentive or autistic. I just want to be free. oh yeah, smoke a bong dab a day for calming the nerves. Peace and love. Thank you kindly for reading.

Hi there, OP. You and another user wanted some solidarity with other people stuck on Seroquel, right? Let me introduce myself: Almost 38/F. Vancouver, Canada. I'm starting a taper from 50mg I.R. Seroquel next week. I've been stuck on it since July 2021, when I had a horrific reaction to LoLoestrin on the 6th day of taking it. I started having symptoms on day #3 (2x/day panic attacks!) Went to walk-in clinic on day #5 & was dismissed/told it was normal. Not for me. I've been on ~7 different b/c pills (all made me spot, and as I got older, really putrid stuff started comming out of me or I bled constantly and never stopped for 2 weeks until I gave up. So, I'm stuck with a menstrual cycle. lol.) I listened to him & kept taking the LoLoestrin. The next night, I went into Psychosis (rapid switching b/n manic laughing & weeping rapid-fire within seconds - I've always been in control of my emotions. I have the emotional regulation of a titan, humble brag.) Next morning, I went to the small local E.R. (even though my mom said nothing's wrong) & they gave me an Rx for something called Seroquel 50mg I.R. (was either that or Ativan - NO! I don't drink, so I never thought of getting drunk until my endocrine system re-balanced) & told me to get my Psychiatrist to get me off of it later. He was always on vacation (80 yrs old?), & I don't trust him whatsoever. I was finally able to get rid of him in Dec 2022. Wanted to get rid of him in Feb 2022 when things really started spiralling out of control, but nobody else avaliable. The 50mg I.R. snowballed out of control with mis Dx's, mood stabilizers, etc. I've tried to taper off of 50mg I.R. Seroquel 11x with either my own pill splitter (crumbly mess) or an in-patient industrial pill-splitter to reduce 1 of the 2 mini pills by 1/4 (12.5%). This never worked. I almost went into Psychosis 3x. I thought the birth control incident was scary enough. At no point since July 2021 in the Hospital's Mental Health & Substance Use Unit (had to get my mom to drive me many times due to withdrawal symptoms from Seroquel or other meds or the meds themselves!) or In-Patient facilities (3x w/in 6 months) did anybody mention a liquid taper. Shocking and pathetic incompetence. I learned about a liquid taper earlier this year by myself. I also learned more about Seroquel last November (h1 & d2 receptors & how the serotonin is different than the serotonin in Pristiq - ******* hell). & even more about its action on Histamine recently. & nobody since July 2021 ever plainly outright straight-up admitted that withdrawal symptoms are real. I've experienced w/d symptoms in the past. The only way I was able to get off Effexor (side-effects because I was Rx'ed way too much in 2015) was to go to Pristiq. I do well on Pristiq. My physiology can't tolerate any of the other SSRI's & SNRI's, although my Psychi always Rx'ed me too much - dangerous! The only reason I want to get off of the 50mg I.R. is because my muscles constantly jerk/twitch all over my body. Sometimes more, sometimes less. Sometimes more frequent. Sometimes less. This is a red flag and dangerous. But I've put up with it because until recently, I had no idea how I was going to try to taper again with a pill-splitter. Since learning about Histamine, I'm doing a low-histamine diet & started a couple of days ago. I do not Diet. It's not necessary for me, nor do I want to restrict. But this is a VERY special circumstance. This may help with the taper from Seroquel, since I learned from someone else on this message board about histamine from their withdrawal from Seroquel essay. (Heartbreaking.) From what I've read in your thread, you're doing quite a fast taper. I plan to do -0.25% off of the last dosage every 4 weeks minimum. Or 6 weeks? & Holding for ever how long. & then going again. Hold however many times my physiology requires. It's not up to me. It's up to my individual nervous system. I'm a non-smoker, non-drinker, and never done weed before. I drink plenty of water & plenty of fibre. I'm sure the other meds I'm on will help at least a little bit with the taper. & I've read that you need to do smaller decreases as time goes by. So, it'll eventually have to be a 0.075% decrease. & then 0.05%. & then 0.025%. I'm not even sure if my syringe for the liquid solution will work. Since I've been on the two 25mg pills for so long, I'm pretty sure I'll have to use 1 of the 25mg pills plus two 1/4 pills (12.5mg total) and then the rest liquid. I've been stuck on this ******* Anti-Psychotic for 2.75 years. If I knew it was an anti-psychotic and how complex it is, I would've taken the ******* Ativan. If it takes 5 years to fully get off of this bullsh*t, I have no choice. I already have partial insomnia for a long time now because of the Pristiq - even with the Seroquel (I'm usually up in the middle of the night tranquilized. I cannot work anymore due to this. It's too exhausting to fight it.) So, I don't want to make it worse by doing a fast taper. I'm going down until the mg where my muscles are no longer tranquilized & the twitching stops. I do not consent to my body moving without my permission, nor do I consent to being tranquilized and unable to move until mid-day next day or rarely the whole day until I take it again at 8pm. Sometimes the tranquilzing wears off a few hrs after I wake up. The tranquilizing decreased when 50mg X.R. Seroquel was added in Nov 2022 because I was withdrawing so severely from a few things at once - dangerous! People really have no idea what they're doing out there. My boyfriend has been right the whole time. I do not have BiPolar #2. I do not have Borderline Personality Disorder. I do not have 'Cluster B'. The reason he likes me is BECAUSE I'm bland, boring, average, emotionally stable, and can regulate my emotions. ie: I'm an incredibly easy partner. I come from a relatively good family. No drinking, no drugs, no domestic violence, no history of "mental illness", etc. So I'm starting to experiment with the low-histamine diet (especially with my dinner & before-bed snack) to see if it helps with the tranquilizing the next day. In July 2021, I went from my trusty 100mg Pristiq ($2/day) -> 5 medications + now 150mg Pristiq ($3/day); I think 9 pills per day. I've been emotionally violated, gas-lit, and dismissed repeatedly in these past ~2.75 years. This is by far the worst thing that's ever happened to me and will ever happen to me. Psychiatric Medication Withdrawal is worse than anything on this whole entire god-forsaken planet. I'm extremely over-medicated, but this myoclonus is downright dangerous. I was extremely hot as well until fairly recently. My long-term boyfriend had to have multiple blankets on during the summer with the A/C full-blast on me. I've been emotionally labile as well. Especially during the summer when the heat was messing with the 2 Seroquels and the SNRI. The Lamictal, Gabapentin, & Seroquel X.R. weren't enough to combat that. Sorry for hi-jacking your thread. I should make my own and make a signature for myself. Anyway. OP, take a looksee: https://reversepsychiatry.org/ https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1pw4tjImAJ92OIVyRvZoZYjqxiKMk7wvp-ljiIi1olRo/edit#gid=246292188 https://withdrawal.theinnercompass.org/taper/special-tips-calculations-and-liquids https://withdrawal.theinnercompass.org/taper/doing-calculations-taper#taper-schedule-2-daily-microtaper https://www.willhall.net/files/ComingOffPsychDrugsHarmReductGuide2Edonline.pdf Specific for Histamine/Seroquel: https://rxisk.org/guide-stopping-antidepressants/#Prominent_withdrawal_symptoms https://beyondmeds.com/2012/12/04/psychiatric-drug-withdrawal/ Thanks

Hello All, I have been on and off this community for almost a couple of years now and finally when the registrations opened I thought I will join to make my journey more systematic. Originally diagnosed with GAD when I was 18 years old and been through a cocktail of drugs (complete timeline at the end). Over the years, the diagnosis has morphed into GAD, OCD and Depression. The last drug I was prescribed is as follows Clomipramine 75mg Lithium 800 mg I have been using this for about 2 years now, and in the last 6 months or so I have observed that I have almost unlimited energy, talk a bit too much and struggle with sleep. Specifically I have Nocturnal panic attacks, which keep waking me up and eventually I get tired of the chest tightness, walks, excessive eating at night and finally fall asleep around 3AM. My Psydoc, asked me to lower Clomipramine to 50mg. This is approx 6 months ago, I did accordingly and symptoms of OCD (intrusive images), lack of energy, crying spells etc came with full force. Hence I restored the dosage back waited 6 weeks to stabilize and commenced on a slow taper approx 10/11/2023. A bit more on the insomnia, I don't have trouble falling asleep, its just that I wake up with panic attack, some time restless leg syndrome. I frequently get more than 4 or 5 panic attacks per night. I have been prescribed Valium 5 mg, which I have been taking for over 8 months now. When I have good spell, I take half (2.5mg) so in total I would have been 60% time taking 5mg each day, and 40% time taking 2.5mg. I am fully aware of benzo dependence and try my best to lower it the best I could but currently I don't want to disturb too many things in one go. Back to my primary medication, My first taper step was 12.5mg (I know it is a big jump, but since I had benzo support I thought atleast I will take this first step higher than 10%) right now I am at 62.5 mg Clompiramine. approximately 6 weeks into it. Anxiety is on the rise but manageable currently. There are good and bad days but overall I am managing to do my tasks. Hypo mania / excited state has definitely gone away and I do have some lethargy and lack of motivation at times. Psydocs wasnt keen on slow taper but I put my foot down that that's how I am going to do it, he is supportive reasonably although he may not believe my approach. I do get second thoughts if I am doing the right thing or shall I listen to my psydoc and add another medication to the mix to manage. So far I have resisted and am coping. I intend to stay at this dose for atleast a few more months before taking another cut (definitely within 10% this time). Valium I will continue till I have stability on clomipramine 50mg. Then will decide how to proceed from that point. Long way to go, wish me luck. 2001 - Generalized anxiety disorder (derealization) - Lexapro 10 mg 2008 - Lexapro 20 mg (increased due to post baby blues) 2010 - Lexapro 30 mg 2016 - Lexapro 40 mg 2019-2020 - Lexapro stopped working, rapid tapers and switching to Fluexotine, Effexor, Remeron etc caused severe depression 2020 - Tried TMS but no avail. Suicidal ideation. Ended up in ER 2021 - ECT sessions to treat Major depressive episodes, discharged from hospital with Effexor 225mg but it wasnt managing the situation 2021- God send Psydoc, identified OCD as a contributory cause, put me on clomipramine 75 mg and Lithium 1500 mg 2021 - 2022: Dosage stabilization at Clomipramine 75mg and Lithium 800 mg, overall high energy state with brief almost hypo mania episodes here and there. 2022-23: Insominia kicked in due to nocturnal panic attacks Nov- 2023: Clomipramine taper started 62.5mg

Pearl was 10 when she had some anxiety and hormonal issues and started having crying spells. She would go to her room and start crying. She was given Antidepressant for that. Initially it helped but then within 2 months she reached tolerance. So dose was increased. Higher dose worked for 2 more weeks. Then crying spells returned in worse intensity along with some mental confusions and distorted thinking. A benzo was added along with Antidepressant. No improvement was found. She started showing behavioral changes, psychosis symptoms (delusions only , no hallucinations). An antipsychotic was added. By the time we realized the drugs are harming her more, and are not the cure, it was almost 7-8 months. We started discussing with doctors and tapering was started. Tapering was done over a period of 1 year. She suffered bad withdrawal symptoms: Loss of sleep Crying spells returning Anger/Rage Zombie/Glazed look Entire day sitting at one place , not doing any thing Hygiene went to hell Memory and Cognitive decline She stopped going to school at this point. We also supported her as she was not able to comprehend what was being taught and it was giving her stress because she was not able to understand. She is drug free from 4 months. Still boiling rage is continuing. Some of the mental confusion/delusions are coming back. Cognition is not at all getting better. She is now 12. Even if we look at her, she starts throwing stuff at us. I being her mother is taking care of her hygiene and health. It will be 5 months of being drug free this week and still not much of an improvement. She is my child and her suffering like this is too painful for me. Is there any way I can speed up the recovery?

First time. Sorry if im not doing this right. So all the drugs ive been prescribed over the years have been for insomnia or for restless legs caused by the antidepressants given to me for insomnia. About a year ago i did a sleep study and was told i have mild sleep apnea and that it could be causing my insomnia. Unfortunately i haven’t been able to sleep with cpap machine. Since the sleep study ive lost 25lbs. After i lost the first 15 my sleep started to get a little better so i started tapering Amitriptyline. From Januaury-late June 2023 I tapered from 50mg down to 10mg just by eye balling it and cutting off gradually bigger pieces. I felt it everytime i cut back further. After 2-3 days i get very irritable, then some flu like symptoms and after about a week the anxiety kicks in. The lower i get the longer it lasts. My last successful taper was last June. I went from taking 12.5mg(half of a 25mg tablet) down to a 10mg tablet. After about a week i had severe anxiety. Its a horrible anxiety that i can feel physically in my upper stomach lower chest area. It took about 2 weeks before it started to go away. Since i got down to 10mg ive tried to go lower 3 times but had to go back to 10mg because i dont seem to be recovering. Ive also been struggling with insomnia ever since I hit 10mg. Before I hit 10mg i was able to taper without it affecting my sleep. When i got to 10mg i bought a scale to help taper more accurately. This is where i ran into trouble. The pills i take are 10mg tablets with a pink coating on it. But they weigh anywhere from 61mg up to 67mg. I Dont know if its the coating thats off or the medicine. After my 1st attempt to taper down from 10mg i wasnt recovering so after 1 month i went back to 10mg. I wasnt sure if it was the medicine thats off in the pills so for a couple weeks i took only pills that weighed between 63-64mg and i leveled out. I did the same thing the 2nd time around but it took about 3 weeks. But this last time ive been just mixing it up taking pills of all different weights 61-67mg. Its been 5 weeks today and although my symptoms have improved im still have a little bit of that sick anxiety feeling off and on threw out the day and trouble sleeping. I dont know if its just taking longer to level out cause of some sort of kindling effect or if its because the medicine is off in these pills. Was wondering if anyone had insight on this. I decided i wont be using the scale in the future since the weight of the pills off by as much as 10%. I bought a medicine bottle, some oral syringe adapters and a 10ml oral syringe. My plan is to use 100ml of water so that every 10ml equals 1 mg. Im just waiting to feel 100% before moving forward. Im very nervous about switching to a liquid. Just looking for advice and support. Again if anyone has any insight as to why i havent leveled out all the way after 5 weeks i would appreciate it. Thank You.

Hello all. I've researched this extensively now, after a google search in late Nov 2022 lead me to this message board and other Psychiatric Medication Withdrawal Supports. I'm finally ready to try again. Trauma from previous attempts has kept me dealing with the extreme tranquilizing + myoclonus (ie: adverse effects) instead of trying again. This will be the 13th attempt. If it takes 5 years, that's out of my control. It's up to my particular nervous system. When I recently suggested to my Doctor about a 10% reduction per month using a liquid, they said it'd be perfectly fine. (& I guess reduce that amount by 10% per month until I'm off?) After going home and calculating how I did it in the past (-12.5%), NO. In the past, taking off 1/4 (6.25mg) of 1 of the 2 tiny pills hasn't worked 11x. (Either by myself making a crumbly mess with my pill-splitter or at an in-patient facility with an industrial one.) I almost went into Psychosis 3 of the 11 times & had to go back up to 50mg right-away. I had to admit myself to the hospital a few of those 1/4 pill reduction attempts, too. I recently calculated that was a -12.5% drop in dosage. No wonder it didn't work. Also, I was told by a Psychiatrist & once by a Doctor to stay with the 1/4 pill reduction and to take "just a little bit of Seroquel" when the limbic system withdrawal symptoms re-appeared. ...You mean like a Benzo? This is literally playing ping-pong with your neurotransmitters, and I wasn't even given "little bit" amounts so had to make do with a crumbly mess. This didn't work and fairly quickly sent me right back to the hospital where they sent me to an in-patient stay again. I held on for as long as I could at home using little pieces of Seroquel like a Benzo, because I did not want to go back to an in-patient facility again. All of this since July 2021 shattered my reputation with my Employer and caused unnecessary stress to my long-term partner, parent, and sibling; let alone myself. Earlier this year, I learned on my own about a liquid taper. It's truly shocking how nobody since July 2021 ever mentioned getting it made into a liquid in order to do an extremely slow taper; not even my Psychiatrist, who I chose finally to stop seeing in late 2022. But from extensive reading online, it's the standard to stop with a Medical Professional when things get unnecessarily out of control, doing harm and no good, and too much frustration. I also recently learned on my own more about Seroquel. I looked it up on go.drugbank.com in early 2022 when things were really getting really out of hand, I was unwell on medications, and things were snowballing out of control. I was scared shitless at how complex Seroquel was and how it differed so severely from Pristiq. Late last year, I learned even more about Seroquel: H1 (histamine - severe tranquilizing for my particular physiology) & D2 (inconsistent myoclonus for my particular physiology). It explained everything & confirmed that it's not "Psychosomatic" symptoms. & earlier this year, I learned more about Histamines, histamine receptors all over your brain and body, allergies, anti-histamines, stomach acid (H2), Monoamine oxidase (MAO) & Diamine oxidase (DAO), etc. Further, last week, I learned about a Low-Histamine Diet for people who have Spring-time allergies. While I don't have any comorbidities of any kind, this Seroquel is a beast on my particular physiology and am now semi-unenthusiastically doing a Low-Histamine Diet for the next handful of years as to not complicate this extremely slow taper & to hopefully reduce the extreme yet inconsistent tranquilizing. I'm now pretty sure how much water I drink + what I eat at dinner and before-bed most-definitely affects the severity of the tranquilizing the next day. Most days, it doesn't fully wear off until mid-afternoon! Rarely, it wears off once I'm awake in the morning. & Rarely, it lasts all day until I take it again at 8pm. From reading online, the menstrual cycle (different levels of the hormones during each phase) also affects Psychiatrric Medications's potency, clearance, etc. + hormone levels and histamines interract with each other + hormone levels and dopamine (D2 inconsistent myoclonus) interract with each other. So that's fun. I never wanted to take this 50mg I.R. Seroquel in the first place, but an E.R. had to give me something to take, because I had a severe reaction to LoLoestrin, which I went the day before to see a Doctor about growing symptoms and was told that the literature says mental health symptoms are very common for hormonal birth control. That's nice, & I've heard that from hundreds of women online, too. Bt I've tried ~7 different b/c pills before with no issues. I've never gone against my better judgement before. This link was very informative for Histamine: https://rxisk.org/guide-stopping-antidepressants/#Prominent_withdrawal_symptoms , as was FerralCat's Essay. When an in-patient facility had to add 50mg X.R. in Nov 2022 because I was withdrawing so severely from a few things at the same time, the tranquilizing greatly reduced, but it's still enough to halt my life. I think the inconsistent myoclonus also increased. So, now to the taper: I have a few questions. In the 'Seroquel Withdrawal' thread, they mention doing 1/2 pill + 1/2 liquid taper, as your Physiology is so used to pill-form. (I've ben stuck on this Anti-Psychotic since July 2021. That's 2.75 years.) So, maybe I should start my taper with one 25mg pill, two 6.25 mg (1/4's), & the rest liquid. (& as I slowly go down, get rid of a 6.25mg and replace that with a liquid, & so forth.) My question: does this seem fine to you guys? Note to self: I'd need to go back to the walk-in clinic to get an Rx for 6.25mg pieces, an Rx for 25mg pills (I only have like 16 left), & a revised Rx for the liquid. Currently, my liquid Rx is 40mg/day (-10% reduction) for 4 weeks & then go back to the walk-in clinic to get more liquid for the next "month-long 10% drop". I don't have the liquid on me, so I'm not sure the total mL in the bottle and whatnot. I'm aware that syringes can be very price with micromL's. This link overwhelmed me: https://withdrawal.theinnercompass.org/taper/special-tips-calculations-and-liquids This link is similar to the info on this forum: https://withdrawal.theinnercompass.org/taper/doing-calculations-taper This link confused me: https://antdep.alwaysdata.net/liquid/liquidForm.php I generally understand this link: https://withdrawal.theinnercompass.org/sites/default/files/2017-05/TheWithdrawalProject_TaperJournal_LiquidMixture_SampleChart.pdf After all of my reading around on here and all of the online calculators/etc, here's what I've come up with (holding for 2-6 weeks as needed not included): See 2 attached images. ****I'm a bit unclear about making smaller and smaller % (or mL?) reductions each 4-6 wks (however slow you want to go). That's been discussed on this forum regularly & want to make sure this taper doesn't go badly whatsoever. I can't afford to stress my partner out anymore, losing money anymore, or traumatizing myself even more than already am from all of this by being it withdrawal. & Finally, I will keep tapering off until the myoclonus & tranqulilizing of my physiology. If that's one 25mg, fine. If that's one 25mg and a 1/4 (6.25mg), fine. I'm still stuck on the 50mg X.R., but that can wait for the future, if at all. I'm on a lot of Serotonin-medication and was extremely hot for the last 1/2 of 2023, as well as scatter-brained and confused. Somehow, the extreme temperature went away back in Nov. I also had a lot of very unusual unlike extreme emotional lability due to all of the meds, especially in the summer. My partner likes me BECAUSE I'm emotionally uneventful and stable and can regulate my emotions/stress. I'm overmedicated, so I should've been experiencing the opposite. I'm well-aware from my Pristiq how dangerous the heat can be with Psychiatric Medications: they clear faster from your body or something? Especially if you're drinking more water in the summer? I expect to have issues with the heat for the next handful of summers, unfortunately.

Hi everybody, I am writing this post on behalf of my wife. Due to some possible withdrawal symptoms such as blurred vision and intense fatigue/drowsiness, my wife is currently unable to post herself. My wife was admitted to hospital in Jan 2023 for her first psychotic episode. During her stay in hospital, she took four anti-psychotic drugs (Olanzapine, Blonanserin, Haplodil Injection, Quetiapine) and three Benzodiazepines (Clonazepam, Brotizolam, Nitrazepam). A mix of up to seven psychotropic drugs kept my wife in bed all day. The psychiatrist here masks the side effects of antipsychotics such as Akathisia, Restless Legs and Drug-induced Parkinsonism by over-sedating and drowsiness. When she was discharged in February, she continued to take 10mg Olanzapine, 2mg Biperiden* as well as two Benzodiazepines (1mg Clonazepam and 0.25mg Brotizolam**). I found this forum because I am doing my best to help my wife get off (or reduce as much as possible) the psychotropic drugs she is currently taking. I cannot trust the Japanese psychiatrists who are so keen to use multiple benzodiazepines at the same time, and it is desperate that these drugs are even used just to prevent insomnia even though my wife doesn't have it. Since being discharged from hospital in Feb 22, we have been tapering the dose of Brotizolam and Clonazepam out of fear of using multiple benzodiazepines at the same time. We would like to stop the Brotizolam but keep the low dose of Clonazepam and wait for the status to stabilize before starting the Olanzapine taper. From March to April this year, the dose of Brotizolam was reduced from 0.25mg to 0.0625mg, the dose of Clonazepam was reduced from 1mg to 0.5mg and Olanzapine was always 10mg. On April 21, my wife's daily medication and supplements were as follows: 10:00 Vit C 250mg, Vit B-Complex***, Ginkgo biloba 60mg 13:00 Vit C 250mg, Vit B-Complex, Ginkgo biloba 60mg 18:30 Biperiden 1mg, Clonazepam 0.5mg, Vit E 400IU, Omega-3 1000mg 20:00 Olanzapine 10mg, Brotizolam 0.0625mg At that time, she was in a more stable state and although she had some symptoms of side effects of the medication, such as blurred vision, lack of concentration and poor short-term memory, they were all at an acceptable level and she was able to do simple light exercise every day. However, after this she experienced problems. From April 22 my wife stopped taking Brotizolam and reduced the dose of Biperiden from 1mg to 0.5mg on April 28. From April 28 till now, my wife's daily medication and supplements were as follows: 10:00 Vit C 250mg, Vit B-Complex, Ginkgo biloba 60mg 13:00 Vit C 250mg, Vit B-Complex, Ginkgo biloba 60mg 18:30 Biperiden 0.5mg, Clonazepam 0.5mg, Vit E 400IU, Omega-3 1000mg 20:00 Olanzapine 10mg Those days, April 24-30, were supposed to be her best days since her discharge from hospital. However, the situation began to turn bad on May 2 when she started to become extremely fatigued and drowsy. She goes to bed at 20:00 and struggles to get up at 10:00. Even after 13-14 hours of sleep she still felt tired, had no interest or motivation to do anything even talk to our children, and wanted to lie down during the day except to eat even though she could not fall asleep. It is usually at 17:00 that her energy returns a little and she gets up for dinner. She did not have insomnia at night but would have vivid dreams could describe the details of them when she woke up, sleep did not seem to give her brain any real rest. Although I kept holding her hands and hugging her to comfort her as much as possible, she felt overwhelmed with failure and powerlessness, she became very depressed and felt like a wreck, she was worried that her state would not improve and she was worried that she would not be able to return to work in 1 month (her sick leave was due to end in a month). This state of extreme fatigue continues to this day and the only good news is that apart from the fatigue she does not seem to have any other new noticeable withdrawal symptoms. Biperiden does not seem to have serious withdrawal symptoms (correct me if I'm wrong), it is anticholinergic medication that works to alleviate the Drug-induced Parkinsonism caused by Olanzapine, which were barely felt on the previous few dose reductions. Personally, we tend to think that it is mainly the withdrawal of Brotizolam that causes the intense fatigue, and that several Brotizolam reductions at the end of March similarly caused fatigue(slightly lighter than now), but it goes away after 2 days. Current questions: 1. Should I keep the status and be patient and wait for the withdrawal symptoms to go away? Still have 1 month of sick leave left. 2. Today is day 13 after Brotizolam withdrawal and day 4 of intense fatigue/drowsiness. If after 1 week there is still no improvement in status, should the dose of Brotizolam be resumed to 0.0625mg? or is it better to be resumed now? 3. Are there ways to reduce vivid dreams and improve the quality of sleep? 4. If Brotizolam is not resumed, what non-pharmacological methods are available to alleviate withdrawal symptom? I have searched and read some of the posts in the forum but they seem to be mainly for insomnia and anxiety, are there any methods and suggestions for fatigue relief? I wish I had found this place earlier, after reading some of the posts I realized that the Brotizolam was being tapered too quickly and that this was causing my wife's withdrawal symptoms. But it's all happened and it's no use regretting it and hopefully I can get some advice and help here to get things back on track from now on. A little help and advice would be great. Thank you for your help in advance! --------------------------- *Biperiden, sold under the brand name Akineton among others, is a medication used to treat Parkinson disease and certain drug-induced movement disorders. It is not recommended for tardive dyskinesias. Common side effects include blurred vision, dry mouth, sleepiness, constipation, and confusion. It should not be used in people with a bowel obstruction or glaucoma. Biperiden is in the anticholinergic family of medication. (From Wiki https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Biperiden) **Brotizolam, (marketed under brand name Lendormin) is a sedative-hypnotic thienotriazolodiazepine drug which is a benzodiazepine analog. It possesses anxiolytic, anticonvulsant, hypnotic, sedative and skeletal muscle relaxant properties, and is considered to be similar in effect to other short-acting hypnotic benzodiazepines such as triazolam or midazolam. It is used in the short-term treatment of severe insomnia. Brotizolam is a highly potent and short-acting hypnotic, with a typical dose ranging from 0.125 to 0.25 milligrams, which is rapidly eliminated with an average half-life of 4.4 hours (range 3.6–7.9 hours). (From Wiki https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brotizolam) ***Vit B-Complex = B1 20mg, B2 15 mg, B6 15 mg, B12 10mcg, Niacin 20mg, Pantothenic Acid 20mg, Biotin 25mcg, Folate 100mcg, Inositol 25mg

Iv been on lorazepam from last nov til this March ..for sleep.. a private dr gave this! When he never should of..I did not know it should not be given, I reinstated it for a month as I came off it for a week and tapered off it for that one week, and experienced terrible withdrawals when I went back on it, I was taking 1mg to 2 mg… I tried switching to diazepam for 5 weeks 10mg to 3.5mg became suicidal, I was put in a mental hospital for 3 days given quetiapine once and diazepam 5 mg once …I became totally unstable after this with rocking sensations and I could not sleep and my tinnitus got so bad ! I stopped putting anything in my body…. And became totally suicidal was eratic! pacing and having no sleep, I lost a lot of weight. And my anxiety became depersonalisation and I separated from my body! I ended up not being able to eat of drink and loosing control of my bowels, I was put into another mental hospital put on risperidone at 6mg I was in a constant physcosis in the mental hospital in so much pain, praying to god! I was in there on 2 weeks I was let out and stopped for 5 days, I started it again on 3mg and became very unwell for 10 days I started loosing control of my bowels and in a lot of pain, all over my body, feeling of burning, all over my body, I became eratic and went into another mental hospital and put on quetiapine at 400mg and mitazipine at 30mg for 2months I’m in a lot of pain and in hell !!! What do I do? I can’t feel anything ! thank you emma x

I’m A Phoenix Rising. I’m a 50 year old mother of 6 and I’ve been on psychiatric drugs for the last 30 years. It all started with Zoloft for depression and GAD. I now have 4 or 5 psychiatric diagnoses and about 5 other diagnoses as a result of my psych meds, which introduced even more drugs to my stash, multiple hospital stays and 3 years of ECT. They have destroyed my memory, made me numb and compliant, given me peripheral neuropathy, idiopathic hypersomnia, and ADHD-like characteristics. Not to mention the compulsions I have developed and desperately need to shake, weight gain, metabolic changes, and amotivational syndrome. These drugs, and psychiatrists, nearly destroyed my family so many times and came way too close to ending my life. The almost humorous thing is, up until Aug. of 2023, I was completely in the dark about the side effects and withdrawal from these drugs. No idea! I lived through it a few times yet I had absolutely no one tell me what I was going through was normal. I thought I had completely lost it and that I was destined to live out my life this way (on meds). Looking back now I see how uncharacteristically angry I would get while on zoloft. After my mother died in 2012, while grieving, I went to see a psychiatrist who put me on an anti-psychotic(seroquel), 2 benzos (klonopin & xanax) and adderall (not yet diagnosed with ADHD). My behavior changed drastically. I had a very short affair then decided that I was ready to die. I wound up in a coma for 3 days, then they promptly shipped me to a psych hospital. On 3 separate occasions they gave me a benzo and then refused after that (their funny idea of a taper, I'm guessing). That was the beginning of my very long withdrawal of those particular drugs leading to psychosis (more diagnoses) more suicide attempts, more hospital stays and finally ECT due to being treatment resistant. Lastly, once finding out I was pregnant (in the ER) in 2019, I was told to go off all meds. I wasn’t able to be seen by an OB for 6 weeks. Once seen they put me back on Effexor XR at 150mg (I was on 300mg), then a month later increased my dose to 225mg. Being an older mom, I was being monitored closely yet they didn’t recognize the very serious withdrawal. After looking at my baby’s brain, they told me it looked like “someone put his brain in a blender”. My son had a very rough start, but over time he pulled through. He is now a very loving, active, charismatic three year old! Symptoms of withdrawal; intense anxiety when I've made a mistake. Otherwise it's nagging insomnia and almost constant irritability. ***Life hasn’t always been sour and angry despite what I’ve written here. I am stable now and feel happiness. I have hope and I’m eager to make the changes needed to live out the rest of my years drug free. -Phoenix

Hi, I’m 70 and have had depression and anxiety on and off for most of my life. I weaned myself off Valium in my thirties successfully. I was prescribed Citalapram 20mg 15 years ago and it works for me. In the past twelve months my mobility has not been good and I have struggled badly with depression as I have the motivation but my body says “no”. My family had to intervene to get me some help and I was prescribed Mirtazapine which helped me through a bad patch. I now would like to come off Mirtazapine as I feel tired all the time. My doctor is aware of this and told me to do it gradually, which is sensible. I’ve been checked for everything to explain my tiredness and everything is fine, so my next step is to look at the meds I take. Thank you for reading this and any advice on coming off the Mirtazapine would be gratefully received.

Hi everyone, I've been a long time recipient of the psychiatric system since I believe 2008/2009. Eventually, I was labelled schizophrenic (and recently labelled "anxiety disorder"). Of course, I am very skeptical of the psychiatry paradigm. I totally forgot my medication past but I have been on Risperdal before, which is all I remember. Right now, the psych drugs I am on are 1mg Benztropine (mornings), Divalproex 500mg S,T,Th,Sat (night), Divalproex 750mg M,W,F (night), and Olanzapine 10mg daily. I used to but stopped Minoxidil. I also take Omega 3 fish oil and vitamin d3. My moods have been usually stable. I have been hospitalized in the past but been stable for at most 7 years. I do have somewhat of a problem with my sleep as I stay up late (and many times have difficulty falling asleep) many times past midnight, and get out of bed late usually 11am or even past noon. I used to run and do exercises but have stopped recently. Sometimes, I do have some anger and frustration. I want to eventually lower my dosages to the lowest possible if not completely. I was wondering which of the psychotropic medications should I lower first? Should I lower one at a time or do a combination of lowering? I read a bit about multiple drug tapering on this site. I read the Inner Compass Project site. I've visited various blogs. I also looked elsewhere. I read that benztropine is not a benzodiazepine but an anticholinergic antiparkinson agent. Is that true? I think I already messed up with my doctor. She has never had a patient who has deprescribed completely and probably wants me on the medication for life. I also have no allies in my family as they are in the medical profession, have seen me at my worst, and they probably believe that any form of psychiatry skepticism is anti-medicine/anti-science. Thanks for any constructive help, WishforBest

I really can't go into many details right now, as I am in the midst of things. You guys can read my history. I had a mini nervous breakdown after a period of intense life threatening stress, with with a war of nerves from family members, strangers etc. etc. too long of a story. I was misdiagnosed with depression, then as you can read I was repeatedly attacked with drugs. At the moment I can't read a book, go out, hold a conversation... I used to be a computer whiz and I can't re-arrange a few folders on the computer, I am completely drained of any energy, I can't cook for myself, and I suffer from mental pain that ranges from the horrible, completely intolerable pain to the barely tolerable. I 've seen all facets of hell. I 've gone out 10 times in 8 months. I smoke tobacco like a chimney. I 'm terribly addicted to benzos.I am mortified by what I am reading about tardive dysphoria. ------------------------------ Invega 9mg tapered to zero over 6 months Levomepromazine 25mg for 3 months Citalopram raised from 20mg to 80mg over 3 months, at 80mg for 1 year and 5 months Venlaxafine raised from 150mg to 450mg over 3 months (after citalopram) maintained for 1 year and 2 months. Alprazolam from 0.5 to 7(!) mg due to the immense stress of the ads. Down to 2.5mg. Discontinued abruptly with almost no tapering within a week and a half, against all guidelines first the citalopram then the effexor. Moclobemide raised from 200mg to 800mg during a month and half discontinued with no tapering. Fluvoxamine and Venlaxafine 300mg and 450mg, abrupt start, no tapering in discontinuation. 30mg Mirtazapin at night. Currently on 2.5mg alprazolam, Diazepam 5mg for 1.5 months.

I'm start to taper klonopin becouse I feel that klonopin is making me the most problems,in fact I suposted to be tapering luvox first but klonopin is asking me more and more to feel some sort of normal so i decated to taper it first,I'm also on diazepam so I hope that I am on the right plce to have some answers becouse Here it is some sort of diferent that on benzobuddies becouse you say to taper ssri first but becouse I am on two benzos maybe it is the right way to taper one benzo then luvox,tnx and be well

Hello, first, I want to emphasize that English is not my native language. A brief overview of my medical history: Since the age of 21, I have had depressive episodes treated with Seroxat and Zoloft. Between these episodes, several years could pass. I easily stopped taking the antidepressants, even though I didn't gradually reduce the doses. Due to mild depression, in September 2021, I asked my psychiatrist to prescribe me an antidepressant again. After just two weeks, I felt better, my energy returned, and the depressive thoughts disappeared. I wasn't aware that the antidepressant had actually triggered hypomania. In March 2023, I stopped taking the antidepressant again. In May, the depression returned with full force. I went back to the psychiatrist and told them about the hypomania. She prescribed Zoloft (50mg), lamotrigine (50mg), and olanzapine (5mg) for sleep, even though I didn't have sleep problems at that time. My condition didn't improve; in fact, I felt like I had lost myself, my emotions, and the will to live. I also experienced a rapid heart rate. The diagnosis of bipolar 2 was not confirmed. My psychiatrist even claims that I don't have bipolar disorder. I suspect that olanzapine is the main "culprit," which is why I tried to stop taking it CT. Immediately, insomnia appeared, and I had to restart taking it. That's when I started researching how to safely taper off this drug and found this website. Since September, I have been gradually reducing the dose of the medication every 3 weeks. At first, it was more than 10%, so now I'm at a dose of 1.125mg since January 10th. I usually notice withdrawal symptoms after about 6-7 days. Initially, I had nausea, diarrhea, difficulty sleeping, anhedonia, and depression. The nausea and diarrhea are now tolerable, and I think kefir has helped me the most. My sleep is between 4 and 8 hours. It's hard for me that my emotions have dulled. For a while, I couldn't even cry. I have managed to do so twice in the meantime. As contradictory as it may sound, I was happy that I could cry. I live in constant fear of how intense the withdrawal symptoms will be. On this difficult path of getting off olanzapine, I would like to hear about experiences. With a reduction in dose, under the condition that the dose is reduced by 10% from the last dose, do the symptoms become milder? Will my emotions at least return a little during the reduction? Will I be a little happier? Is it possible that Zoloft is not working because I'm taking olanzapine? Regarding a potential bipolar disorder, I am going through real agony. I constantly question the last 27 years - have I ever been hypomanic without realizing it? Was the hypomania caused by Seroxat really bipolar disorder? Will I have to take medication for the rest of my life? I have lost trust in psychiatrists. I feel lonely, ashamed, and I'm not even able to talk to my husband, sister, or mom about what I'm currently going through. My husband doesn't even know how olanzapine affects me or that I'm trying to get off it. By the way, as I write this, I'm crying, which I suppose is good. I wonder what I have done so wrong to go through what I'm going now and if I will ever be the way I used to be.

Hello, I am tapering Ambient currently 5mg. I am using the dry cut method with a scale. Is there a spreadsheet or calculator that will calculate the weight and how many mg that is at each reduction? I am terrible at math and this has been where I mess up, I get very anxious and am just not able to think clearly about the numbers. I want to be prepared if pharmacy changes lab which results in different pill weights (long story but I've already tried asking at several pharmacies and none will commit to keeping same lab) that I will be able to make the conversion. My focus is help with the math, if you have suggestions about working with pharmacy that's a secondary issue that's fine but please help with the math!

Hello, I have been on Lexapro for almost 19 years—only off one year was I was pregnant with my firstborn. After 10 years of being on Lexapro (10mg), after dealing with my mother’s death and a newborn baby, I had developed insomnia and anxiety and was put on Trazodone (100 mg) and then later klonopin .5mg taken as needed. Been taking Trazodone for about 8 years now and klonopin on and off for 5. in January of this year after following my doctor’s advice, I tapered lexapro over the course of 6 weeks. Well, obviously it was too quick and hell broke loose shortly after I March. Along with crippling anxiety, panic, crying spells, body jolts, depression ,depersonalization, etc., my biggest and most prominent symptom has been insomnia. Most of the week I sleep a broken 1-4 hours. If I’m lucky, one night a week I will crash and sleep for 8-9 hours. I take klonopin only twice a week max if I hadn’t slept in days and I’m getting in a really bad place (I know this is not optimal, but I feel I’m out of options.) I must note that I also stopped taking my birth control pills at this time, as well and not sure if lack of hormone are also contributing to insomnia. I had reinstated at 2.5 at the end of March, and thought I was feeling okay but May even though my sleep was still off, so foolishly I dropped to 2.2mg. When this happened, I lost all control and had to go back up to 2.4 after 6 weeks of hell and no signs of stabilization. It’s been 3 weeks since I’ve been at 2.4 and my sleep is as bad as ever. I read horror stories about people’s sleep never returning or it taking years. I’ve already been dealing with this for 6 months. I have tried everything from magnesium to melatonin to glycine to weighted blankets and black out curtains—nothing works. Am I doomed to never sleep again? Every area of my life has been affected by this…my marriage, my children, friends, work, etc. I feel like I’m really losing myself and feeling pretty hopeless.

I am dismayed when I look back at the past ten years. I was diagnosed with depression and generalized anxiety disorder and headed off to college with Lexapro. Ten years of therapy, several diagnoses, seventeen medications, and one intensive outpatient program later, I still feel flat inside. My therapist has been encouraging me to reconsider my medication usage - we both share the feeling that I am overmedicated and disregulated. The medications I am currently on - Wellbutrin, Lithium, Trintellix, Caplyta, Topimarate, dosages in signature - have not nudged me in one direction or another - and I strongly desire a change. There are several reasons that drove me to Surviving ADs: Accidentally overdosing on Lithium during the summer Side effects: fine tremor in hands, difficulty getting erections, very low sex drive, constant battle against dehydration, discomfort with heat It's not sustainable for me to pay over $800/month on meds until my deductible is met My psychiatrist is leaving his practice and I need to find someone else for medication management I feel like there must be more to life than the slog the past ten years have been I don't particularly mind taking 10 pills a day, getting labs done every couple of months, or having to take Tadalafil every time I want to have sex, but it has to be worth it. Taking stock of my life right now, I don't think it's worth it. I've given it a good college try, and now I'd like to get off the ride. I'd like to plan tapering off my medications (10% at a time, of course!) while staying in talk therapy, and finding a new healthcare provider. As it goes, I'm not sure how to approach a few pieces of this: I don't really have a great relationship with a doctor at the moment - would it seem adequate to find a new doctor as a prescriber? Once again, my psychiatrist is leaving the practice, so I do need a prescriber as I taper off. How does the taper conversation go with a prescriber? How does a person taper off five medications? Is there an order of operations to follow? I'm at a point in my life where I can't even remember beyond foggy details how I felt before I was taking antidepressants. Would should I expect for returning to the unmedicated LaurenceAloof?

LINK alternative-bzd-administration-to-reduce-side-effects-alexjuice Hello, This is my first time to visit the site. I want to share some things about my experience with Doctors and Drugs while also learning from the experiences of others. I had a rough go of it for a while. Then it seemed like things were going to be better. But, alas, I've been roughing it again. I hope to be an active member and will provide more detail about my story soon. But here's the gist. I developed social anxiety disorder as a teenager. My family of origin had destabilized at this time leading to my isolation. I found my way to a Doctor who started prescribing. I got worse on SSRIs and was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder. I was put on a host of drugs. I always remained on an SSRI - usually lexapro. I am now 32. In the past fifteen years I have been a resident in inpatient facilities 5 times for a total of about 8 months. In October of 2009 I began to taper my medications (then Effexor and Risperdal) but did so too rapidly and fell into a withdrawal syndrome. I restarted a benzo to help with symptoms. I currently take a benzo and have recently tried to modify my dose with lousy effects. I've had a bad month with brain, blood pressure and GI issues. It is tough to stare at the screen right now and type and all of that. I am betting on a better week, better month. So just stay tuned. Alex (Alex is an alias)

Please help me , I have been taking 3 meds ( Olanzapine 5mg , Quetiapine 400mg and Amitrptyline 150mg ) for over 2 years , The last 2 months were very Hard , suddenly I start having Panic attacks , depression , fatigue , 0 appetite , Insomnia ; I've read that it can be from reaching the tolerance , tolerance is when the drugs don't work as they use it because the body get adapted to them , I am pretty sure that I am having tolerance because I start getting my old feelings for the first time . I didn't find anyone that had a similar experience ; Please help , Should I stop the medications ? or i have to just wait ? I don't want to increase my dose or to swicth to other drugs .

Hi! I decided to post here even though my story is complicated. My timeline: April 2020 - floxed by Cipro Until Feb 2021 - polydrugged with many psych meds - ADs (trintellix, escitalopram, cymbalta to which I had a horrible reaction, trazodone) pregabalin, opioids - all because I was told I had anxiety and not Cipro side effects Jul 2022 - consider myself 95% healed Aug 2022 - SETBACK from clomiphene, I get pregnant, symptoms get worse but aren’t as bad as now Nov 2022 - another SETBACK from Fosfomycin, I get terrible immediately but even worse within a few weeks, still getting worse slowly week by week with some windows in between Feb-1st half of April 2023 - horrible wave, don’t think I will ever come out of it 2nd half of April-end of June - symptoms start lifting, I have my baby, feel like so am healing even though I was heavily medicated in labour, I start living again, fully functional - did I get better because pregnancy hormones made me so? July 2023 - slowly symptoms start getting worse without a trigger or maybe the trigger was the meds in labour or just the loss of pregnancy hormones? end of July-2nd half of Aug 2023 - symptoms explode, I feel so bad I can barely handle it end of Aug-first 11 days of Sept 2023 - started getting better again, not great but definitely improvement and I start living again, I am fully functional Starting Sept 12, 2023 - a horrible wave again, even more severe symptoms, symptoms getting worse every week, still in it My symptoms were not as bad as now after Cipro and psych meds, I mean they were bad but now that I have the comparison - not so much. It seems it was the clomiphene that ruined me but I am sure it wouldn’t have happened had I not been polydrugged before. I am over a year into a setback that made things 1000x worse and I haven’t seen ANY improvement. I am only worse if anything. I am barely hanging on. My baby needs me and I am a complete mess. My symptoms come and go, change, usually last for a few hours or a day and change. I stopped having full windows, I just have breaks from some of the symptoms. Evenings are usually better, most symptoms get worse or come on 30-60 minutes after getting up. My whole range of symptoms: - some form of akathisia but not the severe kind, the sensations below are what I experience with it but I don’t get terror or adrenaline surges (this I get but not often), pounding heart, etc., it feels very physical to me - pressure, tension in body, it’s terrible, affects different parts, sometimes neck and back of head, sometimes back, sometimes legs, it feels like I am pumped with air and about to have a one kind of a jolt or a seizure but the don’t come, I am tense most of the time - internal burning, soul on fire, caustic sensations inside that paralyse me; this sensation is so odd, I don’t know if anyone has ever experienced that, it’s not my skin, it feels like heartburn but all over, it’s in the background, in my brain, stomach, neck, legs, arms, when it hits I can barely move as moving triggers the sensation and pain builds up, it also feels kind of electric, it terrifies me because most people only talk about skin burning - electricity inside, jolts from brain down and smaller shocks deep in the body, I have waves of a feeling that I can feel all these tiny nerve connections all over, it’s hard to describe it, it’s sickening, doesn’t hurt but makes me want to lose it because it’s so unnatural, it’s like I can feel nerve cells shaking - buzzing, vibrating inside (sometimes mild in the background, sometimes deep and intense in my back, stomach, legs), some weird commotion inside me, sometimes it even feels like something moves in me or tugs me - weird surges (not very often) in the stomach, head that terrify me - brain symptoms (buzzing, burning, moving, feels like a balloon is being pumped) - when that this I feel like I am going to go into a seizure - overstimulation - restless feelings in different muscles, travelling all over, that’s actually how it began, I was aware of some muscles but it started spreading and now that just feels way worse, like the muscle starts feeling crawly, prickly, tickly, itchy, burns, feels like it’s contracting but it isn’t, almost like they are toxic, not as severe as I have seen aka but I am terrified it will get that bad soon, it can be in any muscles in my legs, back, stomach, arms, upper back - legs - so like a month ago something got bad in my legs and they started feeling was worse than before even though I did have sensations in them - now some days they hurt and feel like they are spasming, twitching, somethings moving inside them, sometimes it’s the butt, then thighs back or sides or front, backs of knees, calves, then comes this inner tickle or burning, vibrations, electric feeling, it’s like they are a separate being from me but it’s not making me pace, at least not yet… Sometimes they just hurt and I kind of prefer it to the creepy feelings. But it’s all sooo awful in general - problems with sleep (most days I can sleep but some days it’s terrible), I wake up a lot because of my baby and most awakenings I feel sort of off, sometimes I am buzzing all over, sometimes just feel weird tension in general - deep muscle/bone toxic and gnawing pain going hand in hand with the tension, burning, feels like the flu or a toothache in body - all sorts of paresthesias (way less bothersome than the other things as I had it from Cipro and I got used to it and it somehow happens less but when it does it’s a bit intense) - raw nerve feelings in my nerve endings like I cannot tolerate certain textures, it’s not burning or anything but feels like my nerve endings are exposed. It usually happens in my arms and hands - as a result of the above horrible fear of my future and crying most days. It’s not all at once, it comes and goes. I haven’t touched any meds since my c-section. I lived through my c-section wound infection with no antibiotics, just silver packings. I just need some hope. I am really scared. Have you seen people heal from polydrugging even if they deteriorated for a longer while? Can I heal from such symptoms? What worries me is that after Cipro it was getting worse for a few months and then symptoms started improving and I could see I was improving. I was so much better that I even considered pregnancy. I tolerated many supplements and even some meds. Back then I had very mild aka and paresthesia mostly. And it was all getting better slowly. I had hope. Really in July 2022 I felt 90-95% healed from the worst symptoms. I only had aka with mild buzzing and muscle sensations in arms every two weeks or so for a few hours. But after the setback in July 2022 I have only seen deterioration. And I started plummeting again this July. Not sure if it’s from all the other drugs I had to take in my c-section but possibly. However, it started getting bad again after 5-6 weeks after having my baby after being in a 2,5-month window in which I felt 60-90% better depending on a day and I was very bad between Feb and April. But I am afraid something just f’d me up so bad that it’s never going to start improving. I have seen others get bad, hit rock bottom and start improving but for me it’s like I haven’t hit rock bottom yet and I am just free falling. It’s the scariest time of my life constantly since the setback. For me it’s like instead of hitting me acutely everything just explodes after a while and symptoms build up and up ☹️ I need some support. Nobody in my real life gets it.

Hi, is there someone I can message or speak to who can help me with a tapering schedule and who can try help me figure out what's going on with me?

Hello, I've just recently found this site and kept reading and absorbing all kinds of information. I am so glad to read so many inspiring stories and would like to share my son’s story. On Nov 2022 last year, my son, Gogo, a recent college graduate and athletic, who has been suffering insomnia since pandemic began was put in Psychiatric hospital for 3 nights after emotional breakdown in public place. Police said he trespassed and his speech was not coherent. He was prescribed Risperidone 1mg in the morning and 1mg at night, 250mg Depakote in the morning and 500mg Depakote at night, as well as 7.5mg Mirtazapine in the evening for helping sleep. When he was discharged from hospital, we saw his speech was disorganized and had deliriums kind of symptom most in the earlier morning and evening sparsely. I thought it was due to the shock by police and medications. So I tried to reduce his med several time, but the symptoms didn’t go away. I paid to ask online psychiatric doctor about it and I got an answer said he most likely has schizoaffective disorder. After I was convinced that his breakdown most likely caused by his sleep deprivation and self medication with recreational drugs, I become more adapted with his continuation of those medications. But I don’t think he has schizophrenia. He still not has any diagnosis. He started to sleep better with those meds but most of day time is tired and lethargic. He was not doing well for his online class because of the lethargy caused by the meds. He was also diagnosed with mild sleep apnea short after discharging from hospital. We don’t have psychiatric doctor for almost 4 month after discharge from the hospital. But we tried to tape Resperidone especially, after consulting a friend who is neuron doctor, but failed, scared by the relapse of symptoms like self occupation and mood issue. I know now from here that the taping is way too fast. We are like walking in the fine line or water with medication management, and still now. His PCP only manage his Mirtazapine. I’m going to tell later what his PCP’s taping strategy for Mirtazapine. On 2/26 still suffering depression and sadness, and noticed that his chest is painful, Gogo insisted not taking any medication. I learned some knowledge about withdraw symptom from online, but find noting about detailed strategy. So my son and I agreed to stop taking the morning med. For the first 2 weeks, he become lively and being more like old himself I know, and had lots of self reflection of the past but more connected, even sometime he experienced strong emotions. But on 3/15, he has another emotional breakdown after visiting a friend. We decided he was not appropriate to drive and take him back in our own car. After this incident, with my knowledge from online study and search, I knew that we may withdraw too fast. Then he started to take the morning meds every other day. I know now it’s another mistake. We did that, and only realize not so late that it make thing worse in a few days. It seems fine for the first few days, then one day he insisted to drive himself without abling to speak logically and express his feeling. He was indecisive when driving. We reinstate to the original dose fully. Actually, I know now that we could have reinstate to lower doses, but we have no guidance. His pcp is not able to offer any help with his psychiatric meds except for Mirtazapine. I just wish we could find the site earlier. Only when I included the word ‘tape” instead “reduce” or “withdraw" in my search that I found this site. On 2/26, Following his PCP taping strategy for Mirtazapine, he started to take 7.5mg mirtazapine every other night for 4 weeks, till 3/26, then 7.5mg twice a week for 3 weeks till 4/18. His sleep seems fine with every other day’s 7.5mg mirtazapine. However, during the twice of week 7.5mg mirtazapine period, he started waking up in the middle of night because almost at the same time he started to taping 250mg evening Depakote on 3/30 following a RN's advice. I think that is another mistake to tape the evening Depakote first. We also finally saw a Psychiatrist on March, who recommend my son to take all 2mg Resperidone in the evening to avoid his daytime lethargy. We are reluctant to do that considering his most recent unstable situation. The Psychiatrist talked to me and asked why, I said I am afraid that the moving medication around the day might make my son unstable again. I shared my son’s med log to her and it seems she never read it. She also email me that she never heard of Resperidone withdraw symptom. She then said how about reduce the morning to 0.5mg. In a mind that want to tape all meds, we took it as she want to tape my son’s Resperidone. So Guoguo took 0.5mg in the morning and Kept 1mg in the evening. It came strong resistance from his Grandma. So I waited for few days before I reduce the morning dose, started reduction on the next Monday after seeing the psy doctor. During the following Thursday appointment with psy doc, my son told her he is doing fine after 3 days 0.5mg Resperidone in the morning . I again see my son begin to come back to be himself, having back his sense of humor, etc. But the weekend is a mix feeling. We went to outing, he was happy and enjoying the trip with friend. But on the way back, he started to show self-occupied without talking here and there, easy to get angry with small things. We start to reinstate his 1mg Resperidone the next morning. During the next appointment, we found out that his psy doc actually want to him to take 1.5mg Resperidone in the evening. She did NO intent to tape. I was so frustrated that why she did not emphasize that to keep the current daily doses unchanged. I also blamed myself for not asking for clarification with his Doc because I was so eager to get him out of those meds. She said we could continue as we have done like 2mg twice a day. She was also very unhappy we didn’t follow her advise, as well seeing an RN. My son did not have an appointment with her last week. I think we are going to find another one. We went to RN again, she gave us 3 options, 1) Go back to take 7.5mg Mirtazapine in the evening or 3.75mg 2) Reinstate the original Depakote of 750mg a day. 3) Move the morning 250mg Depakote into the evening, no Depakote in the morning. Concerning with moving the medication from morning to evening might make my son unstable, we choose to add 3.75mg mirtazapine because my mom is doing really well on that dose for a year and eventually taped off. A few nights he seems well with 3.75mg mirtazapine not waking up, but felt very tired and sleepy in the day. He stopped taking for few days because of that. But that makes him woke up in the middle of night. We also add megnesium 150mg 3 times a day, along with 50mg B6 twice a day and 1.5mg melatonia in the bed time. He went back to 3.75mg mirtazapine again and had only few night not waking up. One night he is so tired and not want to have Mirtazapine and any supplements. But I observe that he is doing fine when waking up. He had two nights not having mirtazapine, his mood seems fine. It seems for me he woke up feel good for those 2 nights without taking mirtazapine. Even he woke up earlier, but he has quality sleep in the first half of night.(we use apple watch to monitor sleep cycle, it’s said AW is close to EEG study). The day before yesterday, he woke up 5pm and stay in the bed for an hour and got up with good mood and took a nap in the afternoon. But he is not having a good sleep yesterday with 3.3g mirtazapine. It was 3.3mg because he did not take mirtazapine the previous 2 days. It’s the right dose? I read here that we need to keep the same dose and same time, some time we dont have the medication at the same time specially in the morning as my son is very hard to get up in the morning becasue of sleep issue. My son really wants to tape all of his medications, which make him gaining almost 20lb for an athletic as him in 3 months. That’s why he agreed to do Keto diet on 3/20. But after the outing incident in front of his friend, he told me he might need take all these med for his life. I said to my son that you don’t need to. I’m sure you will have good sleep without any of those med some time soon and enjoy your life drug free. When my son is stable with Depakote and his sleep, I believe he can start with taping Resperidone. Now just stuck with this Mirtazapine issue and sleep issue, do you think Gogo should take half of the 7.5mg or reinstate to 7.5mg or just stop taking Mirtazapine completely. I'm reluctant to let my son go back to original dose of 7.5mg, which make him gaining so much weight and sleepy during the day. Or take one of the NP advice to keep current doses unchanged and move morning 250mg to evening to make 500mg Depakote in the evening? Or move the Resperidone around to the evening to make him sleep better and less sedated in the day? BTW, I got a jewry scale from the recommendation link here for Mirtazapine 3.75mg, it rounds to 0.0mg, and too sensitive, reading often changes. I still have no clue how to do the liquid form for small doses, any advise will be helpful. Thank you for bearing me and appreciate so much for your help. Best Wishes, Dshine

Hi I’m Sheena. I’m 36, currently tapering off meds. I live with my parents in Florida. I was started on Paxil at the age of 14 1/2 after starting my menstrual cycle. I started birth control at 16 for “safe sex” and was put on it continuously with never taking that week break when I was 23 and got diagnosed with PMDD. I was put on Klonopin 1 mg 3 times a day for nine years at the age of 23 and Effexor at age 23 which I’m still on.I got off klonopin completely in 2019 and got back on in January 2022 and been off since April 2022. I’m 36 now. I’ve been on so many different meds since 14. In 2019 I started natural progesterone cream after being off birth control long enough to get my hormones tested and them saying that my hormones were low. I’m on natural progesterone cream now and my progesterone is still showing up low on my blood tests. My body is so messed up from all these meds. I live with my retired parents and I am very dependent on them and get separation anxiety from them. I want freedom from that so badly because I’m scared for my future. I don’t want to be drugged up but don’t know how to deal with my emotions or life. I’ve done well here and there throughout life though. Im looking for a healing buddy or buddies.

Original topic title: seven and half years on psychiatric drugs, they stopped working, lots of quick changes, now tapering and having huge withdrawal symptoms April 2013 I was originally put on Fluoxetine for social anxiety, at 17 years old, 10mg raising up to 40mg daily. For the first 6 weeks I lay on the sofa feeling worse than ever. It gradually started to have some effect. . Stayed on till May 2014, when I decided to come off. It did lift my mood slightly, but didn't help with anxiety. It was making me lethargic and I wanted to get my energy back. I reduced by half then half again, then stopped. . A few weeks later, after a couple of "big nights out" I woke up with intense mood swings, derealisation, anxiety and light headedness/vertigo. I started to get brain zaps, a sense of impending doom. Doctor put me back on meds - Sertraline, 50mg up to 100mg after a few weeks, then 150mg a few months later. This made me feel a bit better, but coincided with a period of heavy drinking. Late 2015, started to feel unwell again, went to Psychiatrist and was put on 200mg Sertraline, 15mg mirtazapine, 50mg quetiapine. This helped me to feel good, if a little detached and spaced out. Early 2016 I decided I was feeling so good I could stop taking everything. I took no advice, and tapered off extremely quickly. I got very intense withdrawal symptoms - brain zaps, derealisation, impending doom, very intense anxiety, labile mood. I ended up going back on Sertraline but it didn't alleviate the symptoms so I tapered off more slowly, and was off by May 2016. By September 2016 I wasn't coping, and my doctor put me back on Sertraline, which didn't work, so I changed to 45mg Mirtazapine, then added 50mg Quetiapine for sleep.. Life was "bearable" but it didn't make me feel as good as the first time on meds, and certainly didn't feel well or healthy. I was drinking heavily throughout this period. 2017 - stopped drinking Jan - September - this removed my crutch for socialising, so I became isolated and depressed. The meds weren't helping but I was afraid of the withdrawal symptoms. August 2017 I tried TMS, which i don't think really made any difference. I started University October 2017 which made me extremely anxious, and I found it hard to attend seminars and lectures. Around Christmas 2017 my gut problems began, and i have been diagnosed with IBS. 2018, still drinking too much, I started exercising more and managed to get through the first year of Uni. January 2019, I had to defer Uni due to anxiety. Mirtazapine was causing weight gain and I didn't think it was helping, and i believed there must be the "right drug" for me. The psychiatrist advised cross taper from Mirtazapine to Venlafaxine - 150mg raising up to 225mg. I had a bit more energy on this. During 2019 I was drinking heavily again. March 2020 I was returning to Uni and decided to try a strict weight loss diet. I had an intense dream one night which meant I woke up feeling tearful and extremely emotional. Looking for causes, I stopped my diet and returned to normal eating, but the emotional intensity carried on . I took some 5HTP without effect, so went to Psychiatrist. Venlafaxine was increased to 300mg. This is when the akathisia started. My emotions were blunted, and terrible insomnia. My IBS continued to get worse and worse. (nausea, constipation, cramps) I had intense periods of suicidal thoughts, noise sensitivity and brain zaps, (linked - noise led to brain zap and jump, and a peak of anxiety), headaches. I couldn’t concentrate or remember things. I couldn't continue with University and had to defer again. Quetiapine was increased to 125mg to address the akathisia, and Zopiclone for occasional use to help sleep. Several weeks later, no change, so I was cross tapered quickly from Venlafaxine to Vortioxetine 10mg rising to 20mg. This had no positive impact. By early August 2020 i was put back on Mirtazapine 45mg and still on Quetiapine and occasional Zopiclone. This seemed to make me worse, so I wanted to come off everything. I started to taper off Quetiapine quickly, and it seemed to make no difference. I stopped the Zopiclone and went down to 30mg Mirtazapine. I also consulted a private psychiatrist for a second opinion at this time and he put me on Pregabalin for the anxiety, quickly put up to 600mg daily, which he assured me I could stop easily and immediately once my withdrawal symptoms were better. Early September to end of December 2020 I tapered off Mirtazapine and felt awful every time I went down, but i was desperate to get off it. I am now only on Pregab 250mg daily. Current symptoms - insomnia, akathisia, anhedonia, suicidal thoughts, intense feeling of impending doom, general anxiety, digestive problems, brain zaps, noise sensitivity, poor memory, lack of concentration, derealisation. How am I now - most days bad, some tortuously awful, very few are somewhat bearable. Anhedonia and derealisation are constant.