dowdaller: Hello

[dowdaller]

Hi everyone my name is pete I am from Ireland, I am currently med free for the last 8 months I was on a cocktail of meds before that including zanex, olanzaipine, and Effexor I weaned off these meds over a two year period under supervision. I found this tough but I made it, I am currently finding it tough at the moment hence I joined the forum. I suffer from anxiety ocd and depression.

[Nicki1722]

Welcome! I just joined on here as well. There's wonderful support and guidance. Hang in there! I'm hanging in too. A moderator will be along shortly I do believe.

[Shep]

Hi, dowdaller. 

 

Welcome to the forum. 

 

Please give us more information about your medication history, just as the length of time you were on them, how you tapered off, and the symptoms you currently have. Also, please include the date and the dose you stopped at for each medication. 

 

How are you feeling now? 

 

Here are a few links to get you started. These are on what withdrawal is and what to expect:

 

What is withdrawal syndrome? 
 
The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

And some ways of dealing with issues like OCD, anxiety, and depression:

 

Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

 

 

This is your thread to list your symptoms and to ask questions. You'll find plenty of information and support here. 

[dowdaller]

Its a long story, I had what could be described as a breakdown when I was 32 (sep2013) I was under pressure normal stuff kids money etc, I went to the doc and was put on Lexapro, I felt worse and was changed to Effexor after 2 months I was off work at the time and was at home with two small kids so I got worse, so my head was wrecked the doc tried a lot of meds on me. I was on Xanax , olanzapine, sleeping tabs and Effexor. Around xmas I was feeling pretty low so I decided I was going to go a hospital.  I went to hospital in early feb.

 

The hospital was really good and I got a lot of help I was on a serious cocktail of meds at the time 375mg Effexor

 1.5mg Xanax, 2.5mg olanzapine and a sleeping tablet, I was in a bad way as you can imagine.  I was there for 8 weeks staying during the week and going home the weekend.

 

I was diagnosed with ocd / depression and my shrink instantly got me off the Xanax by replacing it with revotril?? And then weaning me off it slowly, but not as slow as I would have wished.

 

He then reduced my Effexor down to 300mg/day, I went off the sleeping tab myself just cold turkey. The Xanax was an horrific withdrawal but I survived.

 

I decided with my shrink that I would wean myself off the meds, I dropped to 225mg the summer of 2014, again rotten withdrawal, the medics tell you its not withdrawal but I got by.

 

I was still feeling very tired in the morning he(psychiatrist) suggested going off the(june2015) olanzapine 2.5mg/day, he didn't taper me, I had an horrific withdrawal 10 weeks of murderous pains in my guts every morning, but again I lived.

 

By January 2015 I was on 175mg of Effexor/day.

 

I was coping okay kept myself busy, I managed the taper myself I would drop 25mgs every couple of weeks till I was down to 37.5mg Effexor august 2015.

 

I was going to Portugal on a family holiday and forgot my meds and that's when I stopped, so that was 8 months ago and I have been doing okay last week or two has been hard lots of things going on at home. I am okay and will survive because that's what I do, I can see I probably rushed the taper, but I was only on the stuff for two years, But that's my story.

Edited July 24, 2016 by JanCarol
Added white space and last doses

[dowdaller]

 

Hi, dowdaller. 

 

Welcome to the forum. 

 

Please give us more information about your medication history, just as the length of time you were on them, how you tapered off, and the symptoms you currently have. Also, please include the date and the dose you stopped at for each medication. 

 

How are you feeling now? 

 

Here are a few links to get you started. These are on what withdrawal is and what to expect:

 

What is withdrawal syndrome? 

 

The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

And some ways of dealing with issues like OCD, anxiety, and depression:

 

Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

 

 

This is your thread to list your symptoms and to ask questions. You'll find plenty of information and support here. 

 

thanks shep, all help appreciated

[dowdaller]

Welcome! I just joined on here as well. There's wonderful support and guidance. Hang in there! I'm hanging in too. A moderator will be along shortly I do believe.

thanks Nicki good to know there is someone out there feeling equally bad

[Shep]

Thanks for giving us more info, dowdaller.

 

You've been through a lot with your meds, but it sounds like you are stoically riding this out, and there's a sense of a lot of inner strength in your posts already. I'm sure you are going to be fine in the end.

 

Here are a couple more links that help explain withdrawal and recovery a bit more: 

 

Brain Remodelling (Rhi's Description of Brain Healing)

 

 

 

How are you sleeping? How is your anxiety level? If you have any symptoms you'd like to address or ask any questions, please feel free to do so here on your Intro/Update thread.

[dowdaller]

My sleep is good shep, thank god. I wake up anxious some days especially with stress. My anxiety is related to my ocd which manifests in intrusive thoughts.

 

I keep my ocd in check using mindfullness and by trying not to feed the obsessions. I tried the giving up approach but felt worse. Churchill said " when you are going through hell, keep goin" so I try not let my illness stop me doin my normal life stuff. Thanks for the feedback shep.

[ChessieCat]

Hi dowdaller

 

Welcome to SA.  You might find Dr Claire Weeks helpful.  She suffered from anxiety herself and taught others how to deal/cope with it:

 

Claire Weekes' Method of Recovering from a Sensitized Nervous System

[dowdaller]

Thanks chessie have read some of her stuff I knew a girl that swore by her. I am fan of tolle an zinn.

[Farout]

Hi Pete, it sounds like you've been coping really well so far.

 

I was just wondering if you had the intrusive thoughts/OCD before you started on the meds.

[dowdaller]

Alright Farout yea I had intrusive all my life I.just ignored them and it worked.for me for 32 years. Then with stress and an unhealty life style I ended up suffereing panic attacks. The ocd got worse on the meds because I was at.home just stewing and getting worse. Im doin my best I got two kids and I cant afford to opt out of life again and go to bed. Which I tried unsuccesfully.

[JanCarol]

Hey Dowdaller, welcome!

 

if you awake with anxiety, it is likely cortisol spikes:  

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/33-waking-with-panic-or-anxiety-managing-cortisol-spikes/

 

"OCD" seems to be a particularly sticky form of Neuro-emotion.  The nasty thing about neuro-emotion is that the seed of the emotion is real, but the amplification of it is ramped up by withdrawal.  So it sounds and feels true, but way too large to handle.  

 

Waiting, distracting, mindfulness (Tolle and Kabat-Zinn = awesome!), patience, gentleness, kindness to yourself, sleep, more waiting, and self soothing are the best ways to pass the time.

 

Healing occurs in Waves and Windows.  You might get a good hour, a good day, a good week, only to have it followed by a month of "down time."  This is because, as your system heals, different sections are "closed for repair" and you just cannot access them.  

 

I described it elsewhere like this:

 

 

...parts of your brain are closed down.  Imagine very complicated road works with about 25 intersections coming together.  This week, the traffic lights are shut down, and you need a cop to manage the intersection.  When that is repaired, well, maybe they need to re-do the shoulders, so they can divert traffic onto them for later when the lanes are being repaired.  Then there's the repairing of the lanes - it doesn't all happen at once.  Sometimes they need to rip up the old tarmac, change all the drainage routes, relocate the services for electricity and plumbing, get down to the foundation, and re-grade it, lay new gravel, then steel rebar, pouring concrete foundation, then laying the asphalt.  Sometimes you will go for 5 months, and the road is still closed, but you can't see what they are doing to it!  Each phase requires time to set and dry.  Then you can paint the lines on it, and go to another part of the intersection - perhaps one of the other incoming roads needs the same treatment.  Perhaps there are exit ramps and roundabouts and flyover lanes that need repair.  Each of which takes time.

 

Now imagine the millions of networks in your brain healing - they don't just, "heal" and be done.  It's a construction process, like Bubble was saying.  Road works for the brain. 

 

Just my way of saying, be patient with yourself.  It might be the tarmac this week - but the lines aren't on the road and you're disoriented.  Maybe the signals are crossed at the intersections, or the signs are removed or there are detours.  Be gentle with yourself, be patient with yourself.  It's a complex process, and the gentler you are, the more easily you will heal.  It does no good to shake your fist and yell at the construction guys while they are doing their work!  So just wave (lol, wave!) at the worker, declare to yourself, "This is yet another symptom of withdrawal," and drive carefully past the obstacle.

 

Lastly, I'm not someone who recognizes "OCD" as a "diagnosis," but instead a sticky habitual way of ruminating and processing thoughts.  You may disagree with me (some people are attached to their OCD, oddly enough) but here are other discussions about OCD and sticky thinking:

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/3882-ocd-obsessive-thoughts-compulsive-behaviors/

 

You've got a lot of great tools in your toolbox.  It is rare to see people first arrive from a long taper (many think that a month is a "long taper").  So your jump from 37.5 Effexor isn't the worst thing that could have happened.

 

You'll get through this.  You've got support here - and you are strong inside.  You've got the tools, and you know - you really know (because you've seen it before) - it gets better!  Just remind yourself of where you were when you started all this - look how far you've come!

 

maybe share with us a post about what it was like:  before you went on the drugs, while you were on the drugs and why you decided to taper, and - the best part - what it is like now, compared to then.

 

Again, welcome!

[dowdaller]

Hey jan, thanks for the advice,

Before I had my breakdown I use to self medicate with alcohol. After any big event or stressful event exam, presentation, big football game etc. I would unwind by binge drinking. This worked well untill I hit 30.

Then I started getting the blues and anxiety after drinking heavily which would be followed by a bout of insomia. My mood would dip for a few days possibly a week but I would shake it. When I would be down, my ocd would ramp up rumination, magical thinking, intrusive thoughts etc. This pattern went on for a few years.

 

During this time I started competing in triathlons. I trained most days and pushed myself to my physical limit. During this period I became obsessed with time. I had to be constantly moving and active. I was under a bit more presure finacially as the economy here crashed.

I began to get panicy and anxious at work. And I would be driving home gripping the wheel. I would come home and go to bed.

I decided i would go to the local doc. I told him what was going on he gave me lexapro 10mg i went off work sick. At this time my kids were off sick too. And i found the stress unbearable. I got xanax off him for my nerves. I soon ended taking about 1.5mg of xanax/day some days i wouldnt take any the next day i would be sick little did I know I was withdrawing.

My ocd got worse my health declined i went to a psychotherapist this resulted in me making more problems in my own mind.

I couldnt sleep maybe 3hours a night. I was like a ghost I lost about two stone. I was then put on zimmerphane. I then woke up every morning hungover. After many visits to the doc i went on olazapine it helped me sleep. And he switched me to effexor and i ended up on the higjest dose. But it effected my brain . During this time my wife miscarried an got deprssed. Xmas eve that year I took 2,5mgs of xanax and 2,5mg of olazapine a sleeping tab and 375mgs of effexor.

I knew if I didnt do something I was going to die. I said "f it" i am going to hospital i felt I failed but in hindsight it was the best thing I ever did. My ocd was off the chart and I thought I was loseing my mind/soul. Thats part one of my story.

[Farout]

I asked because intrusive, OCD-style thoughts were a big part of my adverse-reaction and following fallout.  It seems pretty common that these drugs cause a lot of these symptoms or make them worse.  I was definitely engaged in some unhelpful, 'sticky thinking' beforehand, but it was very low-key, short term and nothing like the monster it became after I took ADs.  

 

I think it's good to acknowledge the unhealthy thought patterns, because you (we) are definitely going to have to find a non-drug way of dealing with them but, like Jan, I'm a bit sceptical about these diagnoses.  I find the distinction between healthy, unhealthy and WOAH! is very subjective and made without ever trying to understand the situational stress a person might be under, or viewing it only with judgmental objectivity where, just because it's not what that individual doctor or psych might consider stressful, that sole fact makes your response a disorder.  

 

Did you take anything else while you were binge drinking?  What you describe sounds a bit like a 'come down', or maybe it's alcohol related - it can cause emotional stuff.  Either way, you were knocking your nervous system around a bit.  

 

Neuro-emotions suck but you'll get through it.  You sound like a driven sort of an individual.  On that note, do watch out for things being reframed now that you are in the psych system.  Whether that triathlon is the sign of a dedicated individual or goal orientated bi-polar cycling becomes an actual issue that might get thrown at you to justify continued med use.   It's bunkum.  Don't buy into it.

[dowdaller]

I asked because intrusive, OCD-style thoughts were a big part of my adverse-reaction and following fallout. It seems pretty common that these drugs cause a lot of these symptoms or make them worse. I was definitely engaged in some unhelpful, 'sticky thinking' beforehand, but it was very low-key, short term and nothing like the monster it became after I took ADs.

 

I think it's good to acknowledge the unhealthy thought patterns, because you (we) are definitely going to have to find a non-drug way of dealing with them but, like Jan, I'm a bit sceptical about these diagnoses. I find the distinction between healthy, unhealthy and WOAH! is very subjective and made without ever trying to understand the situational stress a person might be under, or viewing it only with judgmental objectivity where, just because it's not what that individual doctor or psych might consider stressful, that sole fact makes your response a disorder.

 

Did you take anything else while you were binge drinking? What you describe sounds a bit like a 'come down', or maybe it's alcohol related - it can cause emotional stuff. Either way, you were knocking your nervous system around a bit.

 

Neuro-emotions suck but you'll get through it. You sound like a driven sort of an individual. On that note, do watch out for things being reframed now that you are in the psych system. Whether that triathlon is the sign of a dedicated individual or goal orientated bi-polar cycling becomes an actual issue that might get thrown at you to justify continued med use. It's bunkum. Don't buy into it.

Yes I would be sceptical about my diagnosis my behaviour was not textbook obsessive compulsive disorder. My psychiatrist was cool he was not into putting labels on people. This guy is the top man here. He encouraged me to get off the medication. He said I had a borderline personally disorder at a push. He got onto mindfulness etc. The mess didn't help with the infusion thoughts especially lexapro.No I just drank a fair bit of alcohol maybe 10 500 ml cans in a sitting at least once a week.

[dowdaller]

This week things have been okay I have increased my intake of high quality fish oils and the weather here has been really good,my mood has stabilized, 

[AliG]

Dowdaller.    

If your mood has stabilized at 8 months, that is great news. However, you will probably experience more " windows & waves" , as this is the pattern of recovery. It could possibly take a little longer, but everyone is different. If you can take this time to acquaint yourself with some of the self -help care available , it will hopefully lead you towards a drug- free future. 

Ali

[dowdaller]

Yes Ali I have had windows and waves, my mood can be fickle small things can put me in bad form. I heard this evening a guy I knew from school passed away. He was only 36, I didnt really like him at school. But I still felt sad, he was so young.

[Farout]

Be kind to yourself. It's nice, caring that you feel sad for your ex-classmate. Try not to dwell too much on each feeling as they happen. Humans were gifted with a range of emotional responses for good reason. It's normal that yours might be heightened in withdrawal, or after the stress/trauma of withdrawal.

[dowdaller]

Be kind to yourself. It's nice, caring that you feel sad for your ex-classmate. Try not to dwell too much on each feeling as they happen. Humans were gifted with a range of emotional responses for good reason. It's normal that yours might be heightened in withdrawal, or after the stress/trauma of withdrawal.

Thanks Farout, been tired today I did some weight training on monday feel tired today and edgy just par for the course really, Thanks again for the advice.

[dowdaller]

Today was a wave day, felt okay this morning but as the day rolled in. I felt more anxious and I felt physically cold. I managed to keep my discomfort from my wife and kids. I have learned that moaning and complaining just makes a bigger deal out of it than is neccessary and compounds the anxiety. I find if you keep a positive exterior it can help drag you out of a mini slump. I got 4 good days so cant really complain. I will do minfulness now then go to bed. Hopefully tomorow will be a little easier.

[dowdaller]

I had a good day today, I woke up a bit shaky. But work was a good distraction. I still get little waves of anxiety throughout the day but nothing major. I am taking protein, fish oils and maca supplements. I found it harder when I was tapering more so than now, when I am on nothing.

[JanCarol]

That's good to hear dowdaller!  

 

I know the feeling.  I used to say:   "I am unhappy on the drugs, I may as well be unhappy off of them."  But what I found was, that as I came out from under the fog - gradually the thick, sticky stuff lifted, and I realized how much of my unhappiness was caused by the drain the drugs caused on me.

 

I hope you see the sun today!

[dowdaller]

That's good to hear dowdaller!  

 

I know the feeling.  I used to say:   "I am unhappy on the drugs, I may as well be unhappy off of them."  But what I found was, that as I came out from under the fog - gradually the thick, sticky stuff lifted, and I realized how much of my unhappiness was caused by the drain the drugs caused on me.

 

I hope you see the sun today!

 

I Have been doing really well since my last post and have to navigate through some potentially stressful situations.I think the fish oils have helped and have started taking vit b12 and magnesium thanks to info I got on the forum.All else good just one day at a time.

[dowdaller]

Had a sticky day today. No major issues I was just feeling antsy all day. I did some weight training yesterday and when I am fatigued I notice my mood dips.

I just continued with my dailly routine, work was okay I just find some days just drag. I did some gardening when I got home which I enjoy to a certain extent. I will just endevour to persevere. I have been sleeping well with just s little anxiety in the morning. So I know I should be thankful for small mercies.

[dowdaller]

The last few days have been okay. I think that over doing exercise deffently effects my mood. I just try to stick to my routine no matter how rubbish or anxious I feel. I try not to let too many people know if I am feeling crap.

My doc told me the confessing thing is a big ocd trait that and looking for constant reassurance is another, all these bad habits do is re enforce faulty thought patterns. So I try to go with my gut now, make a descision and stick to it. Were in the past I would have procrastanated and looked for lots of advice.

So today was mostly a window day. Onwards and upwards.

[dowdaller]

The last few days have been okay, suffered some anxiety I drove the kids to a play area that I wasnt familar and the road was poor and that makes me anxious at the best of times. Then latter in the day my wifes car was stolen but it was recovered quite quickly. I am.gping to paris with a few football buddies to see a game at the weekend. This is my first weekend away with the boys since I became unwell.3 years ago. They are going to be drinking alot while I will be watching myself. I dont really want to go now, but I think its all part of the jorney.

 

I have a busy few weeks ahead. In the past I would have avoided stressfull situations. But you end up living in fear of everything.

[Farout]

The last few days have been okay. I think that over doing exercise deffently effects my mood. I just try to stick to my routine no matter how rubbish or anxious I feel. I try not to let too many people know if I am feeling crap.

My doc told me the confessing thing is a big ocd trait that and looking for constant reassurance is another, all these bad habits do is re enforce faulty thought patterns. So I try to go with my gut now, make a descision and stick to it. Were in the past I would have procrastanated and looked for lots of advice.

So today was mostly a window day. Onwards and upwards.

 

 

I find the 'fake it 'til you make it' approach to waves worked quite well for me. It's difficult to know when to reach out and get support and when to bunker down and pretend everything is ok.  I did find it stopped me dwelling too much if I had to plaster a smile on for the kids.  Although I realise that we are incredibly lucky to be able to even consider doing it. Other times, when I was really sick, I just had to withdraw to bed.

 

It is curious that you live in a place where the confessional is a fundamental part of a lot of people's lives and yet it has become a mental health thing. I suppose it's a question of degree.  How often were you doing it?

[dowdaller]

 

The last few days have been okay. I think that over doing exercise deffently effects my mood. I just try to stick to my routine no matter how rubbish or anxious I feel. I try not to let too many people know if I am feeling crap.

My doc told me the confessing thing is a big ocd trait that and looking for constant reassurance is another, all these bad habits do is re enforce faulty thought patterns. So I try to go with my gut now, make a descision and stick to it. Were in the past I would have procrastanated and looked for lots of advice.

So today was mostly a window day. Onwards and upwards.

 

 

I find the 'fake it 'til you make it' approach to waves worked quite well for me. It's difficult to know when to reach out and get support and when to bunker down and pretend everything is ok.  I did find it stopped me dwelling too much if I had to plaster a smile on for the kids.  Although I realise that we are incredibly lucky to be able to even consider doing it. Other times, when I was really sick, I just had to withdraw to bed.

 

It is curious that you live in a place where the confessional is a fundamental part of a lot of people's lives and yet it has become a mental health thing. I suppose it's a question of degree.  How often were you doing it?

 

 

In the past my life was an open book I told people the things that were troubling me, as my mental health deteriorated I began confessing more and more personal stuff to people around me, I was trying to unload the burden but I ended up putting it on to other people. Apparently confessing is a big ocd trait so I keep stuff to myself and try to compartmentalize things. I would constantly talk about work, hobbies etc in an obsessional way. 

But all I ended up doing was feeding these obsessional thoughts, so I try to keep things to myself.

In terms of religion I was indoctrinated in the catholic faith from a very early age, But was never religious however when I got sick I did go back. But have drifted away since, my personal beliefs are at odds with conservative organised religion. I believe we all have a soul and are all connected through energy in the universe.

I also think Einstein said " life is like riding a bicycle, if you stop peddling, you fall off" I stopped peddling for a while and ended up in "the pit". So yea fake it till you make it , all the way.

[dowdaller]

So the last few days have been okay. At times like this I think I can handle anything. I feel like any wave will break off me.

I think is that it effexor, is that all you have??. But I know when I am down I wont be so defiant.

This time last year, I was on about 50mg of effexor. And I feel that it is a matter of getting use to life situations without the effexor.

Humans can adjust to any environment or situations. It is just a matter of not pressing the eject button and digging in. Easier said than done I know.

[dowdaller]

Been a fairly okay two weeks my mood is okay, have had some ocd anxiety , relating to some unpleasant thoughts but i just try to remain present in the now and not worry about the future too much. Had a pleasant number of days in paris, back now to the daily grind, but at least I am able to go to work and function.

[Altostrata]

Alright Blazes, I have been on a few of the meds you are on at the mo. That olanzapine is hard to get off, my doc just took me off 2.5mg cold turkey no taper , it was 9 weeks of hell ended up in casualty with stomach pains off the chart. I stuck it out I found it made me very dopey in the morning. You are doing the right thing with the effexor slow and steady. Good luck with the taper.

 

Hello, dowdaller, I just found this. Did you go off olanzapine before Effexor?

 

Did anything help the gut pains? What did your psychiatrist say about the 10 weeks of severe withdrawal symptoms? After 10 weeks, did the withdrawal symptoms go away completely?

[dowdaller]

 

Alright Blazes, I have been on a few of the meds you are on at the mo. That olanzapine is hard to get off, my doc just took me off 2.5mg cold turkey no taper , it was 9 weeks of hell ended up in casualty with stomach pains off the chart. I stuck it out I found it made me very dopey in the morning. You are doing the right thing with the effexor slow and steady. Good luck with the taper.

 

Hello, dowdaller, I just found this. Did you go off olanzapine before Effexor?

 

Did anything help the gut pains? What did your psychiatrist say about the 10 weeks of severe withdrawal symptoms? After 10 weeks, did the withdrawal symptoms go away completely?

 

 

Basically what happened was I was feeling rubbish in the mornings very dopey very tired, I was sleeping well no dreams no nightmares. I explained this to my shrink, I said I thought it was the 2.5mg of olanzapine that was doing it, His exact words were " there is only one way to find out" so the next day I stopped taking it. Then I was okay for two days, then the sickness came, awful pains in my gut, I kept going to work and drinking **** loads of water. I was in bits, and on the 3rd day I rang the hospital, I was talking to one of the junior docs, they said it could be withdrawals. About a day latter I went to A and E they examined me and said I was okay as far as they were concerned. 

This was bad for about two weeks gut pain anxiety all sorts of horrible side effects, I looked it up online and found this was the drill for coming off this crap. So I had horrible days for about 2 weeks then I would get an odd okay day and then the okay days outnumbered the horrible days. This took nine weeks. 

I took sodium bicarbonate(can act as a laxative) for the burning in my gut, and wheatgrass, apple cider vinegar, fish oils etc I was on about 225mg of effexor at the time I had just tapered down from 300 on my docs advice about 2 months before I quit the olanzapine.

 

The medics dont have a clue about the hell coming off these meds. I am off that stuff about 2 years and I have no gut pains any more, so yes they do stop,

[Altostrata]

Was olanzapine the last drug you went off?

 

Very happy to hear you're doing better. I added our cheerful "here comes the sun" symbol

☼

to the title of your Intro topic, to show you're recovering.

Please continue to let us know how you're doing. I hope you will add your story to our Recovery Success Stories eventually!

[dowdaller]

Was olanzapine the last drug you went off? Very happy to hear you're doing better. I added our cheerful "here comes the sun" symbol☼to the title of your Intro topic, to show you're recovering.Please continue to let us know how you're doing. I hope you will add your story to our Recovery Success Stories eventually!

No effexor was the last drug I came off, and the worst in terms of withdrawals, Im off all effexor 10 months olazapine about 2 years and zanex and zimmerphane about 2 and half years. The worst in terms of intensity of symptoms was zanex, easiest was the sleeping pills. And effexor is horrible because the withdrawals can last years but arent as intense as zanex.

 

One day at a time, my life is better exponentially compared to when I was on all the meds.:-) but it hasnt been easy, the fact I was only on them for a short time, has helped imo.