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☼ CJAJ16: So scared and lost - Escitalopram withdrawal


CJAJ16

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wow doctors are so stupid!

Update 8122017

Zoloft  2004. Effexor 2004-2006. Paxil 20 mg for 2006-2010. Ct 2010, bad effects back on, stable by 2011.  Poopout June 2015. Zoloft with paxil for a while, stopped Zoloft.

Sep 2016 paxil 16.2 mg alone(295 mg pill weight). Started tapering 11/14/2016.

Took off 1 mg pill weight(total pill weight of 20 mg = 365 mg and 16 mg is 295 mg). Went down 1 mg per week of pill weight so down to 291 mg by end of November. Starting getting anxiety issues starting since 12/10/2016. Hoping that a faster taper will help.

12/14/2016 - 15.95 mg (291 mg pill weight)

12/16/2016 -  15.83 mg (289 mg pill weight)

12/23/2016 -  15.67 (286 mg pill weight)

8/12/2017 -  15.34 (280 mg pill weight)

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  • 1 month later...

Is it time to give up being off the meds??

Has anyone else failed and had to go back on meds??

 

My health anxiety is through the roof, it's crippling me.

Can't eat, sleep, or do anything. I'm too afraid to be alone so I have to be with my husband or parents. I'm so depressed, I can't stop crying. The future terrifies me.

It's been since May now that I stopped meds and things are getting harder emotionally.

I don't know how to get myself out of this black hole. I don't want to be someone who lives on meds and the thought of them scares me but how do I get out of this??

Please help me ????

You can hear my story on the Let's Talk Withdrawal podcast. Its a global weekly podcast created by James Moore that interviews experts and others suffering from the awful effects of psychiatric medication. Here's how to listen...

 

If you have an iPhone, iPad or PC/Mac with iTunes, this link will take you to the iTunes Store where you can subscribe so each new episode will download automatically...

https://goo.gl/Yz7Zmp

Or you can also listen and download each episode here on any device...

http://jfmoore.libsyn.com/

 

Started AD aged 14 (1997)

Stopped AD Escitralopram aged 33 (May 14th 2016) weaned down from 20mg to 1mg

10 months SSRI free since May 2016

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Hi CJ.  Did you end up reinstating 1 mg. It's unclear from your signature. Maybe you could update with the month etc. 2 weeks ago is ambiguous now. 

 

Has anything changed in your circumstances ? Have you had added stress, illness, antibiotics or increased caffeine, exercise, alcohol etc?  Diet ?

 

How long have your symptoms been like this?

 

It could be a wave that you might have to just go through but will eventually ease up and open into a window.

 

I don't think you have to give up the idea of being off medication. This can pass.

Ali

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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Thank you for replying to me.

No I never reinstated 1mg. I stuck with it. I started to feel a bit better then I got an ear infection which caused awful dizziness and made my anxiety really bad again. I had 2 rounds of antibiotics and betahistine for dizziness.

I did have an awful stress with it as the stupid GP mis-read my symptoms when I had the ear infection and sent me to A&E, which sent my health anxiety spiralling.

This increased anxiety and feeling of complete depression has been about 4 weeks now.

You can hear my story on the Let's Talk Withdrawal podcast. Its a global weekly podcast created by James Moore that interviews experts and others suffering from the awful effects of psychiatric medication. Here's how to listen...

 

If you have an iPhone, iPad or PC/Mac with iTunes, this link will take you to the iTunes Store where you can subscribe so each new episode will download automatically...

https://goo.gl/Yz7Zmp

Or you can also listen and download each episode here on any device...

http://jfmoore.libsyn.com/

 

Started AD aged 14 (1997)

Stopped AD Escitralopram aged 33 (May 14th 2016) weaned down from 20mg to 1mg

10 months SSRI free since May 2016

Link to comment

Well , that is enough to cause a small tidal wave.  :)   You have had extra complications on top of your " normal " windows and waves pattern. I found at the 6 month marks were when I had more waves for some reason and I would just try to practice acceptance.

 

What coping skills are you using ? I found distraction to be invaluable as well as " changing the channel " on my thinking alongside walking, yoga, music and just getting out in the sun for a while.  My favorite was employing all four - walking with my Ipod in the sun with some yoga first thing in the morning. Sun Salutation.

 

Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/846-change-the-channel-dealing-with-cognitive-symptoms

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1921-forest-bathing-reduces-cortisol-aids-mood-immune-system/

 

Ali

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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I hadn't even thought that what's happened could cause a wave. The Dr said that it couldn't still be withdrawal?

 

I'm not really doing anything as I'm so anxious doing anything is hard, it takes all I have to put food in my mouth and wash and dress myself. The last couple of days I've made myself go out for a walk with my mum. I will again later.

 

I was just thinking that the old problems are back and that it couldn't still be withdrawal.

You can hear my story on the Let's Talk Withdrawal podcast. Its a global weekly podcast created by James Moore that interviews experts and others suffering from the awful effects of psychiatric medication. Here's how to listen...

 

If you have an iPhone, iPad or PC/Mac with iTunes, this link will take you to the iTunes Store where you can subscribe so each new episode will download automatically...

https://goo.gl/Yz7Zmp

Or you can also listen and download each episode here on any device...

http://jfmoore.libsyn.com/

 

Started AD aged 14 (1997)

Stopped AD Escitralopram aged 33 (May 14th 2016) weaned down from 20mg to 1mg

10 months SSRI free since May 2016

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For the last couple of years , I've put everything down to withdrawal. What makes you think it's not that ?  Antibiotics are drugs too and can also destabilize the CNS. Anxiety and stress can send you into a wave.

 

I certainly wouldn't be taking too much notice of a doctor. Didn't they put us here in the first place ?

 

I would breathe, stay calm, employ the coping skills ( listed in the links above)  and ride it out. Try not to panic.

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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I guess I just thought withdrawal would be over and that the original problems had come back.

 

Thank you for helping me and all your advice!

You can hear my story on the Let's Talk Withdrawal podcast. Its a global weekly podcast created by James Moore that interviews experts and others suffering from the awful effects of psychiatric medication. Here's how to listen...

 

If you have an iPhone, iPad or PC/Mac with iTunes, this link will take you to the iTunes Store where you can subscribe so each new episode will download automatically...

https://goo.gl/Yz7Zmp

Or you can also listen and download each episode here on any device...

http://jfmoore.libsyn.com/

 

Started AD aged 14 (1997)

Stopped AD Escitralopram aged 33 (May 14th 2016) weaned down from 20mg to 1mg

10 months SSRI free since May 2016

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I'm waiting to see someone from the mental health team. Things have got so bad again I spoke to them on the phone last night and they've told me to go to my Drs today to get some Sertraline. This is apparently "safe" in pregnancy and breastfeeding (my drive for coming off in the first place)

 

I'm heartbroken that this is what I might have to do? I've been through 4 months of hell. Knowing all u know now about SSRI's I'm very frightened to take anything.

But she said on the phone I can't carry on like this and she thinks the Sertraline will help!

 

So frightened and confused ????

You can hear my story on the Let's Talk Withdrawal podcast. Its a global weekly podcast created by James Moore that interviews experts and others suffering from the awful effects of psychiatric medication. Here's how to listen...

 

If you have an iPhone, iPad or PC/Mac with iTunes, this link will take you to the iTunes Store where you can subscribe so each new episode will download automatically...

https://goo.gl/Yz7Zmp

Or you can also listen and download each episode here on any device...

http://jfmoore.libsyn.com/

 

Started AD aged 14 (1997)

Stopped AD Escitralopram aged 33 (May 14th 2016) weaned down from 20mg to 1mg

10 months SSRI free since May 2016

Link to comment

Have you visited Laura Delanos web site? She was also put on psych meds at the age of 14. She has recovered and here's her story:

 

http://recoveringfrompsychiatry.com/story/

 

Hugs!! Wish you fast healing!!

Citalopram 40mg from 2003-2015

Jan 2015 started tapering first dropped to 35mgFeb 30mg, March 25mgApril 20mg, May 17,5mg, June 15mgJuly 12,5mg, Aug 12,5mg,

Sep 0mg for 5 days because of stomac flu and after I raised to 7,5mg. All the symptoms of acute WD shaking, diarrhea, vomiting, barely could walk ect. Still didn't realize that it wasn't only stomac flu but I was also going through WD.

Oct 2,5mg and crashed again badly and quickly raised to 4mg. It was then when I knew my symptoms were due to WD.

Then in November after a month holding on 4mg raised to 5mg due to muscle weakness and had a VERY BAD reaction to reinstatement: akathisia(lasted for one or two weeks), insomnia, anhedonia... Drop quicly back to 4mg, Dec 3mg

Jan 2016 2,6mg( in the middle of Jan after I had been on 2,6mg for a week I tried to updose to 2,8mg and immediately had bad reaction to it: akathisia for a day, andehonia got worse. The next day dropped back to 2,6mg), Feb 2,4mg( a new symptom PGAD lasted 24/7 for 2 months after that on and off), March 2,4mg, April 2,3mg, May 2,2mg, June 2,1mg, July 2,0mg( Pgad almost nonexisting, sleeping pretty good, still some anhedonia but there has been a lot of gradual progress), Aug 1,97mg-1,89mg, Sep 1,88mg-1,49mg, Oct 1,48mg- 1,70mg,

Nov 0,65mg- current dose 0,5mg

 

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Thank you. I will take a look at it.

My family and the Drs are telling me I should take the Sertraline, I've failed ????

You can hear my story on the Let's Talk Withdrawal podcast. Its a global weekly podcast created by James Moore that interviews experts and others suffering from the awful effects of psychiatric medication. Here's how to listen...

 

If you have an iPhone, iPad or PC/Mac with iTunes, this link will take you to the iTunes Store where you can subscribe so each new episode will download automatically...

https://goo.gl/Yz7Zmp

Or you can also listen and download each episode here on any device...

http://jfmoore.libsyn.com/

 

Started AD aged 14 (1997)

Stopped AD Escitralopram aged 33 (May 14th 2016) weaned down from 20mg to 1mg

10 months SSRI free since May 2016

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Reinstating escitalopram or starting with sertraline to deal with your symptoms is not your failure. (((((hugs)))))

 

The medical professionals and pharmaceutical manufacturers who haven't bothered to study fully the effects of discontinuing these drugs have FAILED you.  The drug manufacturers are no better than street-level drug pushers, except for wearing more expensive clothing.

 

You did what you thought was right; you followed the advice of someone who is supposed to know how to assist people with medical situations. This is the failure of the medical profession, not the patient.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.
1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results

Cymbalta 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 2016: 20 mg to 7 mg exact doses and dates in this post; 2017: 6.3 mg to  0.0 mg  Aug. 12; details here


scallywag's Introduction
Online spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet

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Thank you for being so kind to me.

I just wish I was stronger and not crippled by anxiety. It is a failure because if I take the Sertraline I won't be able to have a baby and our dreams will be ruined. If I don't take it I'll continue to sink deeper into this black hole. I can't win, it's ruined me ????

You can hear my story on the Let's Talk Withdrawal podcast. Its a global weekly podcast created by James Moore that interviews experts and others suffering from the awful effects of psychiatric medication. Here's how to listen...

 

If you have an iPhone, iPad or PC/Mac with iTunes, this link will take you to the iTunes Store where you can subscribe so each new episode will download automatically...

https://goo.gl/Yz7Zmp

Or you can also listen and download each episode here on any device...

http://jfmoore.libsyn.com/

 

Started AD aged 14 (1997)

Stopped AD Escitralopram aged 33 (May 14th 2016) weaned down from 20mg to 1mg

10 months SSRI free since May 2016

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

I repeat: starting to take sertraline is NOT a failure. Look at it this way:  Get started on sertraline; get stabilized on a dose; then start gradually and carefully reducing your dose. 

 

Your dreams of becoming pregnant and having a family with your husband are still possible.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.
1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results

Cymbalta 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 2016: 20 mg to 7 mg exact doses and dates in this post; 2017: 6.3 mg to  0.0 mg  Aug. 12; details here


scallywag's Introduction
Online spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet

Link to comment

Will that not just begin a never ending cycle of stopping and starting everytime I do withdrawal?

The dr said to me "if you were diabetic you'd take medication, it's just the same" is it the same?

You can hear my story on the Let's Talk Withdrawal podcast. Its a global weekly podcast created by James Moore that interviews experts and others suffering from the awful effects of psychiatric medication. Here's how to listen...

 

If you have an iPhone, iPad or PC/Mac with iTunes, this link will take you to the iTunes Store where you can subscribe so each new episode will download automatically...

https://goo.gl/Yz7Zmp

Or you can also listen and download each episode here on any device...

http://jfmoore.libsyn.com/

 

Started AD aged 14 (1997)

Stopped AD Escitralopram aged 33 (May 14th 2016) weaned down from 20mg to 1mg

10 months SSRI free since May 2016

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

The dr said to me "if you were diabetic you'd take medication, it's just the same" is it the same?

 

CJA,

 

A big fat "no" on this one.  That is the now discredited "chemical imbalance" theory of depression rearing its ugly head.  That mantra is the one used by Big Pharma to convince you that you NEED the drugs to get "better" when all the evidence indicates (I) there is no chemical imbalance that can be measure and (2) long term use of their meds will create a greater likelihood to continue to be depressed (so-called "tardive dysphoria").

 

Your doctor has been sold a bill of goods and is passing it on to you.  Read "Anatomy of an Epidemic" by Robert Whittaker.  You will understand a lot better how this all works.

 

And, to echo what Scally said, this is NOT a failure on your part.  These are drugs that change the chemical connections in your brain and make the brain reliant on their continued use.  That's not on you -- it's on a system that failed to advise you (and all of us) of these consequences.

 

Best,

 

Andy

Sertraline 50mg and Clonazapam .375mg from 2000 -- symptoms of dizziness Spring 2012

increased to .5 Clonazapam and 100mg Sertraline -- no improvement

Benzo microtaper from November 2012 to November 2014 (followed benzo sites "taper benzo first")

Started Sertraline taper in December 2014 cut by 25mg to 75mg; 62.5mg 1/1/15 and 50mg on 2/1/15

Held at 50mg through April 5 to use liquid 
Reduced dosage in 10% or less drops from 50mg to 25mg -- at single tablet of 25mg on 10/5/15

Transitioned to all liquid for accuracy while tapering -- Horrible insomnia -- back to 25mg liquid and held until October 1, 2016

10/16 -- 11/18 tapered very slowly to 10.6mg.  No real improvement and never really stable so updosed to 12.5mg (1/2 a pill) for convenience and long hold.

After 8+ months of holding with no noticeable improvement decided to add .4ml of liquid Prozac (about 1.5mg) to see if that improves the situation

Supplements, Magnesium, D3, Omega 3, curcumin, Valerian, 81mg Aspirin, L-Theanine, Vit. C,

 

Link to comment

Thank you Andy.

Knowing all I know about these drugs now makes me want to run a mile from them! When she said that I thought maybe she was right because I have mental health problems I need the drugs. I don't want the drugs! I hate them and what they've done to me. But the Dr and the psychotherapist is saying I can't get over my anxiety issues without them?

I don't know how else to deal with the anxiety. When the anxiety began at 14 I was given the drugs and have had them in my system ever since. I've never had to deal with it without the chemical support.

I'm at a loss at what to do ????

You can hear my story on the Let's Talk Withdrawal podcast. Its a global weekly podcast created by James Moore that interviews experts and others suffering from the awful effects of psychiatric medication. Here's how to listen...

 

If you have an iPhone, iPad or PC/Mac with iTunes, this link will take you to the iTunes Store where you can subscribe so each new episode will download automatically...

https://goo.gl/Yz7Zmp

Or you can also listen and download each episode here on any device...

http://jfmoore.libsyn.com/

 

Started AD aged 14 (1997)

Stopped AD Escitralopram aged 33 (May 14th 2016) weaned down from 20mg to 1mg

10 months SSRI free since May 2016

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Your brain doesn't "need" the drugs to get out of the anxiety.  Your brain "needs" the drugs to keep out of withdrawal at this point.  Therefore, what you need to do is to reinstate the drugs, as suggested, at a low level and try to stabilize at that low level for a sufficiently long time (3-6 months in my view).  Once you have been stable for an extended period, i.e., the anxiety is manageable, etc. you can do a nice, slow, controlled taper and add in self-healing and coping tools (meditation, tai-chi, yoga, qi gong, etc.) to help you deal with anxiety that crops up.  It is doable but it is not an easy process.

 

Best,

 

Andy

Sertraline 50mg and Clonazapam .375mg from 2000 -- symptoms of dizziness Spring 2012

increased to .5 Clonazapam and 100mg Sertraline -- no improvement

Benzo microtaper from November 2012 to November 2014 (followed benzo sites "taper benzo first")

Started Sertraline taper in December 2014 cut by 25mg to 75mg; 62.5mg 1/1/15 and 50mg on 2/1/15

Held at 50mg through April 5 to use liquid 
Reduced dosage in 10% or less drops from 50mg to 25mg -- at single tablet of 25mg on 10/5/15

Transitioned to all liquid for accuracy while tapering -- Horrible insomnia -- back to 25mg liquid and held until October 1, 2016

10/16 -- 11/18 tapered very slowly to 10.6mg.  No real improvement and never really stable so updosed to 12.5mg (1/2 a pill) for convenience and long hold.

After 8+ months of holding with no noticeable improvement decided to add .4ml of liquid Prozac (about 1.5mg) to see if that improves the situation

Supplements, Magnesium, D3, Omega 3, curcumin, Valerian, 81mg Aspirin, L-Theanine, Vit. C,

 

Link to comment

So even after 4 months reinstating can help? Will I not get side effects going back on it?

would you suggest I reinstate lexapro or try the Sertraline like the dr suggested?

You can hear my story on the Let's Talk Withdrawal podcast. Its a global weekly podcast created by James Moore that interviews experts and others suffering from the awful effects of psychiatric medication. Here's how to listen...

 

If you have an iPhone, iPad or PC/Mac with iTunes, this link will take you to the iTunes Store where you can subscribe so each new episode will download automatically...

https://goo.gl/Yz7Zmp

Or you can also listen and download each episode here on any device...

http://jfmoore.libsyn.com/

 

Started AD aged 14 (1997)

Stopped AD Escitralopram aged 33 (May 14th 2016) weaned down from 20mg to 1mg

10 months SSRI free since May 2016

Link to comment

They usually suggest in this forum to reinstate at 1mg. But I want to remind you that 1mg of escitalopram equals 2mg of citalopram...

 

Reinstatement isn't riskless. There are some people who have reacted badly to reinstatement.

Also CT and fast taper are risky so you have to make the decision which is less risky for you: the reinstatement or just keep pushing through. 

 

No one knows how long the healing takes time. It took three and half years for Laura Delano to heal from cocktail of psyche meds which she tapered in 6 months.

 

What are your main symptoms? Do you have any physical symptoms?

Citalopram 40mg from 2003-2015

Jan 2015 started tapering first dropped to 35mgFeb 30mg, March 25mgApril 20mg, May 17,5mg, June 15mgJuly 12,5mg, Aug 12,5mg,

Sep 0mg for 5 days because of stomac flu and after I raised to 7,5mg. All the symptoms of acute WD shaking, diarrhea, vomiting, barely could walk ect. Still didn't realize that it wasn't only stomac flu but I was also going through WD.

Oct 2,5mg and crashed again badly and quickly raised to 4mg. It was then when I knew my symptoms were due to WD.

Then in November after a month holding on 4mg raised to 5mg due to muscle weakness and had a VERY BAD reaction to reinstatement: akathisia(lasted for one or two weeks), insomnia, anhedonia... Drop quicly back to 4mg, Dec 3mg

Jan 2016 2,6mg( in the middle of Jan after I had been on 2,6mg for a week I tried to updose to 2,8mg and immediately had bad reaction to it: akathisia for a day, andehonia got worse. The next day dropped back to 2,6mg), Feb 2,4mg( a new symptom PGAD lasted 24/7 for 2 months after that on and off), March 2,4mg, April 2,3mg, May 2,2mg, June 2,1mg, July 2,0mg( Pgad almost nonexisting, sleeping pretty good, still some anhedonia but there has been a lot of gradual progress), Aug 1,97mg-1,89mg, Sep 1,88mg-1,49mg, Oct 1,48mg- 1,70mg,

Nov 0,65mg- current dose 0,5mg

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

So even after 4 months reinstating can help? Will I not get side effects going back on it?

would you suggest I reinstate lexapro or try the Sertraline like the dr suggested?

 

As RFTS said, it is hard to predict how reinstatement will work in any given case, but there is reason to believe it might help alleviate your anxiety if it is truly crippling at this point.  Only you can be the judge.  As to side effects, whatever reactions you had to the drug originally you are likely to have again.  This is all just a means to stabilize with a goal of tapering at a later date.

 

If you were to go to Sertraline -- a new med for you as near as I can tell -- it would be a question of "instatement" not "reinstatement" as all SSRIs have a somewhat different mechanism of action.  They certainly overlap but judging whether or not Sertraline would help is not as clear for me.  If I were looking to reinstate, I would go with the med I was using at the time I tapered -- in your case, Lexapro.

 

Best,

 

Andy

Sertraline 50mg and Clonazapam .375mg from 2000 -- symptoms of dizziness Spring 2012

increased to .5 Clonazapam and 100mg Sertraline -- no improvement

Benzo microtaper from November 2012 to November 2014 (followed benzo sites "taper benzo first")

Started Sertraline taper in December 2014 cut by 25mg to 75mg; 62.5mg 1/1/15 and 50mg on 2/1/15

Held at 50mg through April 5 to use liquid 
Reduced dosage in 10% or less drops from 50mg to 25mg -- at single tablet of 25mg on 10/5/15

Transitioned to all liquid for accuracy while tapering -- Horrible insomnia -- back to 25mg liquid and held until October 1, 2016

10/16 -- 11/18 tapered very slowly to 10.6mg.  No real improvement and never really stable so updosed to 12.5mg (1/2 a pill) for convenience and long hold.

After 8+ months of holding with no noticeable improvement decided to add .4ml of liquid Prozac (about 1.5mg) to see if that improves the situation

Supplements, Magnesium, D3, Omega 3, curcumin, Valerian, 81mg Aspirin, L-Theanine, Vit. C,

 

Link to comment

Hello,

I was only on it for 2 years, but at 20 and then, 30 mg.

my "doctor" also put me on 2mg of Abilify for 8 mos. This was all for some situational depression. It wasn't even that bad.

I cold turkeyed from all on Sept 4? And am feeling the exact same way you are. I am at a loss. I feel for you. I am so sorry to hear what you are going through.

in Aug 2014, prescribed 20 mg of escitalopram.  Oct 2014, upped to 30 mg.

In January 2016, "doctor" added 2mg of Abilify

I had been taking .5 Xanax in AM and PM for a few years

Xanax November 23rd, 2016 .25   5 times per day

Took .5 Ativan in AM and .5 Ativan in PM 10 hours apart for 2 weeks and 2 days. I stopped Ativan on Nov 4th 2016

I cold turkeyed off escitalopram and Abilify on September 4, 2016

i crosses over to 1 mg of Klonopin in Dec 2016. 

Since withdrawal, I have occasionally taken 10mg or 20mg propranolol when my heart was pounding uncontrollably

Supplements Magnesium, Vitamin C, Natural Calm magnesium drink.  Just started  11/16/16 Lactium supplement 167mg at night.

Godiswithme: I'm very scared   Godiswithme: Xanax taper after cold-turkey of Lexapro and Abilify

Jan 2017. Slowly reinstated Lexapro over 4-5 mos to 15mg. Have stayed on that amount. 

Sept 2017. Started tapering 1mg of Klonopin. As of May 2017, I am at .426 mg of Klonopin split into 2 doses per day. 

Link to comment

I wanted to comment on this as well. I was also on SSRI (mostly lexapro) for 8-9 years (seems like a blur).  I tried a few times to come off lexapro, in the beginning it was okay and then I got hit with a wave of really crappy symptoms.

 

 I tried again this July and stayed lexapro free for 3 months but my anxiety got so bad and I could not function for the last week.  I felt like I wanted to hide this intense depersonalization/detachment feeling, racing thoughts then insomnia hit and terrible headache that lasted 5 days!  I could not even do things to help with the anxiety like yoga, walking my dog, going to the park I was in fear and dizzy with ears ringing and anxiety.

 

 I made a decision to reinstate this week.  I slept a bit better and got thru the work day okay with the help of a small dose of xanax.  I hate being on SSRI, the emotionless, the tiredness, indifference, dizziness, the only thing it does is helps me function and not feel like I am going crazy.  I still have anxiety on lexapro but not as intense if I were off.

 

 I reinstated at 2.5 mg and my plan is to stabilize for few months.

 

 I felt like a failure I cried and thought I am not strong enough.  But at the end, I am still going to try,it is just a small step back.

 

 I had to reinstate so that I can function and continue on with doing vitamins, healthy diet, walks, yoga.  And when I am strong and stabilized enough I will attempt to taper again.

 

 I think that when you become nonfunctional and cannot do things like in my instance I cannot not go to work I have a mortgage and my family cant financially support me, so I had to reinstate because of that.

 

 Maybe If i had financial stability and other support I would have hold on longer.  But to each its time.

 

 I am glad I can function somewhat and I will continue this quest to be drugs free.  It is a journey.  Each person is different and there are limits.  You can be strong and hold on or you can reinstate and take a step back.  You have to listen to your body and be accepting.  

Edited by AliG
added paragraph breaks

04/10 Luvox 25 mg PM, Nortriptyline 1 mg PM

03/08/19: Buspar 2.5 mg AM, 5 mg PM

01/01/19: Xanax 0.125 AM 5 times a week. Occasionally, 0.125 twice a day AM & noon

12/18 Armour Thyroid 60 mg (for hypothyroidism) 

 

Supplements: B Complex, B12 (adeno), multi-vitamin, D, Adrenal Cortex, iron

  • Lexapro 20 mg 2007 - 2013 with various attempts to stop
  • 2013 found a new Dr and started trying other meds: Prozac, Notryptoline, Effexor, Buspar, Gabapentin, Paxil, Nardil
  • Lexapro 15 mg 2015 - 04/2016
  • Vibryiid 10 - 15mg 05/16-06/16 
  • NO MEDS 07/16 - 10/31/16
  • Reinstated 10/31/16 at 2.5 mg lexapro, increased to 5 mg   
  • 1/13/17 switched to Luvox 50 mg before bed
  • 1/20/17 Luvox 37.5 mg PM
  • 12/18 Luvox 10 mg PM, Nortriptyline 2 mg (started Nortriptyline 06/17 at 10 mg)
Link to comment
  • Mentor

So even after 4 months reinstating can help? Will I not get side effects going back on it?

would you suggest I reinstate lexapro or try the Sertraline like the dr suggested?

 

 

hi CJAJ16

If you read my signature you can see that I went off and on lexapro several times and never once properly tapered. I was off of it completely since early May

 

I crashed bad a couple of weeks ago and had to face the same decision- reinstate or try to tough it out. Frankly I was suicidal, the panic attacks and feelings of doom were so bad.

 

so i was off lexapro for 5 mos at least and have reinstated. AND I have a long history of going on and off meds cold turkey, so I was NOT a good candidate for this to work. but IT DID work.

 

I have a 1cc (1mL) syringe (ask at your drug store, they give them away for free with liquid meds)

I decided to take half of 1/1-0 of mg of lexapro (that's a tiny tiny TINY bit- 1/20th of a mg!!) and within 4 hrs I felt physically better. The emotional stuff is taking longer and I have gone up to 1/5 of a mg, split into two daily doses at 7 am and 7pm (0.1 mg each time)

 

and I am so glad I did this. I am now just at about 9 days, I guess- and I feel like I will be able to survive this. Each day gets a little better

 

Lexapro is SO strong that even a tiny fraction of a mg has an effect.

 

If you decide to reinstate, I personally would suggest that you do what I've done, take a tiny drop of it. Get a 1cc syringe that is marked off in 1/10ths of a cc and fill it up to the first line, and the put half of that back in the bottle (there are tiny lines so just go to the middle line under the 0.1 line)

 

take that and see what happens.

you can always go up, if need be, but I took the advice to go SLOW and small very seriously this time, and since I have experience with tiny doses for my pet rats, I decided to TINY dose myself

 

and it's working.

if it hadn't worked, I could always go up a bit (and in fact did go up a tiny bit rather quickly but I was desperate and suicidal) but I still am way under 1mg.

 

I'm at 1/5 of a mg, split into 2 daily doses

 

there's no reason why you can't do the same thing.

i responded to my first dose of lexapro (when I first started on it years ago) almost immediately. I take that to mean I am super sensitive, I don't know.

and now, reinstating, I had a rapid response to that too.

 

ppl say it takes 4 days to do anything, no, I'm sorry I am sure it made a difference much sooner. I believe in the placebo effect but that first tiny dose alleviated a physical symptom that I did not even KNOW that I had - I was in such distress from the intrusive thoughts I did not know that my entire body, all my muscles, were tight and that first tiny dose of lexapro loosened them up, relaxed them, so that I could breathe freely again.

it was like a miracle to me.

 

I am sorry you are going thru this but i do think you'll make it thru.

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
Link to comment

Catnap, so you reinstated at 0.2mg of lexapro? Yes, to me reinstatement of 0.2mg sounds a lot safer than 1mg of lexapro which is also much more powerful AD than many others. (Still I'm not recommending anything since I just don't know what the outcome can be after 4 months off even at 0.2mg and I'm so traumatized from the bad reaction I had after updosing of 1mg citalopram.)

Citalopram 40mg from 2003-2015

Jan 2015 started tapering first dropped to 35mgFeb 30mg, March 25mgApril 20mg, May 17,5mg, June 15mgJuly 12,5mg, Aug 12,5mg,

Sep 0mg for 5 days because of stomac flu and after I raised to 7,5mg. All the symptoms of acute WD shaking, diarrhea, vomiting, barely could walk ect. Still didn't realize that it wasn't only stomac flu but I was also going through WD.

Oct 2,5mg and crashed again badly and quickly raised to 4mg. It was then when I knew my symptoms were due to WD.

Then in November after a month holding on 4mg raised to 5mg due to muscle weakness and had a VERY BAD reaction to reinstatement: akathisia(lasted for one or two weeks), insomnia, anhedonia... Drop quicly back to 4mg, Dec 3mg

Jan 2016 2,6mg( in the middle of Jan after I had been on 2,6mg for a week I tried to updose to 2,8mg and immediately had bad reaction to it: akathisia for a day, andehonia got worse. The next day dropped back to 2,6mg), Feb 2,4mg( a new symptom PGAD lasted 24/7 for 2 months after that on and off), March 2,4mg, April 2,3mg, May 2,2mg, June 2,1mg, July 2,0mg( Pgad almost nonexisting, sleeping pretty good, still some anhedonia but there has been a lot of gradual progress), Aug 1,97mg-1,89mg, Sep 1,88mg-1,49mg, Oct 1,48mg- 1,70mg,

Nov 0,65mg- current dose 0,5mg

 

Link to comment
  • Mentor

Catnap, so you reinstated at 0.2mg of lexapro? Yes, to me reinstatement of 0.2mg sounds a lot safer than 1mg of lexapro which is also much more powerful AD than many others. (Still I'm not recommending anything since I just don't know what the outcome can be after 4 months off even at 0.2mg and I'm so traumatized from the bad reaction I had after updosing of 1mg citalopram.)

yes, I guess I should not be recommending anything either, as I am sure I am quite lucky that this is working out for me.

 

I only wanted to stress that I think there's no reason to jump all the way up to 1mg, I think a fraction of that is safer, that's my main point.

 

CJAJ16 has to do what she's comfortable with, but since I haven't seen anyone else do what i am doing, with the tiny tiny dosage for re-instatment, and since it's been a huge success for me so far, I wanted to share that information.

Since lexapro comes in a liquid and is a 1:1 solution, it's not hard to do a tiny dose like this

 

with other drugs, this might not even be possible.

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
Link to comment
  • 2 weeks later...

Thank you so much to everyone who took the time to reply to me. You helped me realise that what happened with the acute ear infection sent me into a very nasty wave.

I stuck with it and I feel like I'm coming into a window. I feel almost normal again (but I have 2 periods like this in the last 6 months).

My question are...

 

Can waves and windows last weeks not just days? Reading the thread on this topic ppl talk about it in terms of days.

 

For ppl that stuck with remaining off the SSRI how long until the waves stop?? Or how long until the waves got shorter and easier??

 

I'm so scared of a wave coming back. I feel so good right now I'm going to go back to work part time of Tuesday (haven't been there for 6 months). I'm frightened that if I go back I'll hit another wave and not be able to go in again, then I'll be in big trouble with work.

I want to get my life back but I'm fearful of doing so. Can anyone offer advice?

Thank you again to you all x

You can hear my story on the Let's Talk Withdrawal podcast. Its a global weekly podcast created by James Moore that interviews experts and others suffering from the awful effects of psychiatric medication. Here's how to listen...

 

If you have an iPhone, iPad or PC/Mac with iTunes, this link will take you to the iTunes Store where you can subscribe so each new episode will download automatically...

https://goo.gl/Yz7Zmp

Or you can also listen and download each episode here on any device...

http://jfmoore.libsyn.com/

 

Started AD aged 14 (1997)

Stopped AD Escitralopram aged 33 (May 14th 2016) weaned down from 20mg to 1mg

10 months SSRI free since May 2016

Link to comment

May I please ask you if you were experiencing crippling anxiety? I had been following your thread. I'm trying to decide whether or not to reinstate. So you stuck it out. So proud of you. You mentioned health anxiety. But did you have anxiety in general? So happy you are feeling better.

in Aug 2014, prescribed 20 mg of escitalopram.  Oct 2014, upped to 30 mg.

In January 2016, "doctor" added 2mg of Abilify

I had been taking .5 Xanax in AM and PM for a few years

Xanax November 23rd, 2016 .25   5 times per day

Took .5 Ativan in AM and .5 Ativan in PM 10 hours apart for 2 weeks and 2 days. I stopped Ativan on Nov 4th 2016

I cold turkeyed off escitalopram and Abilify on September 4, 2016

i crosses over to 1 mg of Klonopin in Dec 2016. 

Since withdrawal, I have occasionally taken 10mg or 20mg propranolol when my heart was pounding uncontrollably

Supplements Magnesium, Vitamin C, Natural Calm magnesium drink.  Just started  11/16/16 Lactium supplement 167mg at night.

Godiswithme: I'm very scared   Godiswithme: Xanax taper after cold-turkey of Lexapro and Abilify

Jan 2017. Slowly reinstated Lexapro over 4-5 mos to 15mg. Have stayed on that amount. 

Sept 2017. Started tapering 1mg of Klonopin. As of May 2017, I am at .426 mg of Klonopin split into 2 doses per day. 

Link to comment

Hi Godiswithme

 

Yes! I've had crippling anxiety to the point I could not eat, sleep or even walk to the toilet without panicking. Up until last week I hadn't left my house in over a month! The anxiety is mainly focused on my health but it touches other aspects too, like being alone, worrying about other ppl, all sorts of things.

This is the second wave I've had since the initial hell of stopping the drugs. Each time I've stuck with it and not reinstated any drugs. That decision was mainly driven by my fear of feeling worse if I did reinstate and also my anxieties about taking any medication.

I just stuck it out, like I say didn't leave my house, stayed on the sofa or in bed, tried distracting myself by reading and watching TV. I'm blessed to have loads of support from my husband and parents so they made sure I was always with someone and made me food to try and eat.

I'm by no means 100% out of it yet but my mood has improved and I feel stronger to try and face the things that make me anxious whereas before I'd just let them take me over.

I'm still very scared this feeling won't last and it'll get its evil grip on me again.

You can hear my story on the Let's Talk Withdrawal podcast. Its a global weekly podcast created by James Moore that interviews experts and others suffering from the awful effects of psychiatric medication. Here's how to listen...

 

If you have an iPhone, iPad or PC/Mac with iTunes, this link will take you to the iTunes Store where you can subscribe so each new episode will download automatically...

https://goo.gl/Yz7Zmp

Or you can also listen and download each episode here on any device...

http://jfmoore.libsyn.com/

 

Started AD aged 14 (1997)

Stopped AD Escitralopram aged 33 (May 14th 2016) weaned down from 20mg to 1mg

10 months SSRI free since May 2016

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Waves -- and windows for that matter -- can last hours, days or weeks.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.
1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results

Cymbalta 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 2016: 20 mg to 7 mg exact doses and dates in this post; 2017: 6.3 mg to  0.0 mg  Aug. 12; details here


scallywag's Introduction
Online spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet

Link to comment

Waves -- and windows for that matter -- can last hours, days or weeks.

 

or months....

Dose History: 19 Feb 2014 - Escitalopram 10mg daily June 2015 - Started taper, 5mg every other day July 2015 - 5mg every 2 days August 2015 - 5mg every 3 days September 2015 - 5mg every 4 days Sept 14th - Completed tapering, but at 7 weeks "drug free" I suffered serious WD symptoms as a consequence of "incorrect" tapering. Nov 25 2015 - Re-instated Cipralex @ 2.5mg daily. WD symptoms faded. Held at this dose and experienced "windows and waves". 12 Oct 2017 Reduced dose to 1.25mg. 13 Mar 2018 Reduced dose to 0.625mg (approx.). 16 April 2018 0mg. Windows and waves triggered by stress (IBS/reflux, headaches, sinus issues) Aug 2019 Mirena coil fitted 6 Jan 2020 MAJOR Wave hit 19 months following last dose (protracted WD).  Symptoms listed below Mar 2020 Mirena coil removal.

Therapy: Nov 15th 2016 Re-started therapy Jan 19th 2017 Started CBT Dec 2017 Started listening to Hypnotherapy CD (self-esteem). Nov 2019 Started couples therapy.

Supplements: "Bioglan" Biotic Balance Ultimate Flora 10 billion CFU, live Bacteria, Probiotic, suitable for Vegetarians, with Lactobacillus Acidophilus, Lactobacillus Rhamnosus, Bifidobacterium Longum"Pukka" Vitalise a unique blend of 30 energising botanicals.

Diet: 16 April 2018 Detox cleanse / anti-candida for 90 days. Jan 2020 Started "small plate" diet (i.e child size portions).

Exercise: Stretching, Yoga, Pilates, Spinning, Elliptical/upper body workout, walking.

Medical Test Results: 4 Jan 2017 Homeopathic Treatment starts 24 Feb 2017 Started weight loss program 24 Mar 2017 Naturopathic Treatment + anti-Candida diet started due to suspected Candida Related Complex (CRC). DETOXED for 7 weeks to "re-set" gut. April 2017 "Genova Diagnostics" Comprehensive Stool Analysis NEGATIVE; Full Blood Count (Normal) / Blood Cholesterol: 5.6 (Borderline) / Blood Sugar (Normal) / 28 Jun 2017 FSH 8.2 / 14 Nov 2017 FSH 17.7 Dec 2017 Blood Cholesterol: 3.9 (Normal) / Kidney Function (Normal) / Blood Sugar (Normal). December 2017 "Genova Diagnostics" Food panel allergy (bloodwork) analysis - a few "VERY LOW/VL" allergens; Mar 2018 "Genova Diagnostics" SIBO urine analysis: High Level of Yeast/fungal markers found in small intestine but NO SIBO.  April 2018 Thyroid (Normal) / Full Blood Count (Normal) / FSH (Normal). 16 April 2018 Started anti-Candida diet - 3 month protocol.   25 March 2020 All test results "Normal". CRP" 5 mg/L (normal range to 0-5 mg/L).

Symptoms:  Flu-like symptoms, anxiety, anhedonia, sinus headaches right-side (severe), IBS issues/reflux (severe)**, tinnitus, fatigue, inner tremor, nausea, chills/hot flushes, pounding heart, muscular issues including stiff left hip flexor, intense anger, PSSD (ongoing).  **Histhamine intolerance (suspected).

Major Life Events: 

Re-located to UK from Canada: Jan 2016

My father died: 5:05pm, Monday 5 Feb 2018 Last Lexapro dose: 16 April 2018 (its now been over a year since I quit ADs)  Moved house: Friday 23rd February 2018  "Divorced" toxic Mother: Monday 26 March 2018 Starting working again: 19 November 2018  Diagnosed with: 5th August 2021 PTSD/C-PTSD Diagnosed with: March 2022 Interstitial Cystitis (IC)/Painful bladder syndrome

Link to comment

Well that's reassuring in some respects.

Do the waves get shorter as time goes on and when do they stop completely?

You can hear my story on the Let's Talk Withdrawal podcast. Its a global weekly podcast created by James Moore that interviews experts and others suffering from the awful effects of psychiatric medication. Here's how to listen...

 

If you have an iPhone, iPad or PC/Mac with iTunes, this link will take you to the iTunes Store where you can subscribe so each new episode will download automatically...

https://goo.gl/Yz7Zmp

Or you can also listen and download each episode here on any device...

http://jfmoore.libsyn.com/

 

Started AD aged 14 (1997)

Stopped AD Escitralopram aged 33 (May 14th 2016) weaned down from 20mg to 1mg

10 months SSRI free since May 2016

Link to comment

Hi there CJAJ16, 

I did not read through all the posts, did you end up reinstating after all? 
I think everyone in WD has asked himself the question if reinstating would just be the only solution - and who would blame you? Nobody wants to go through this hell. You feel lost and scared and horrible in all ways - you just want this to end. 

 

I had a few phases since my WD started where I seriously considered reinstating. But all the knowledge I collected about these drugs and after what I experienced in WD (which is tons worse than the state I started off from) so I never did. 

 

But there is one thing I can tell you:  6 months is not a  long time being off meds. My WD only started to kick in after round 3 months of quitting. +

 

I have a very nice medical practitioner I was talking to about it and he told me that it is absolutely normal that it takes at least 1 1/2 years until you recover. All Doctors before that were telling me, like yours, that WD does not exist or can´t take this long. 

It felt really good to hear from a professional that recovery takes that long. 

But whether you reinstated or not - I hope that you will feel lighter soon and that you find a fitting way for you to get better!!

2005-2006: Cipralex 5 mg

2009-2010: Cipralex 5 mg

2012-2015: Cipralex 5mg, 10mg 

tapered 10mg-7.5mg-5mg-2,5-0 (I always waited for a few weeks on the current dosage until I felt stable. Steps were too big I realized too late)

Completely drug free since August 2015

Link to comment

Well that's reassuring in some respects.

Do the waves get shorter as time goes on and when do they stop completely?

Do you feel like you are yourself? I feel very odd when I leave the house.

in Aug 2014, prescribed 20 mg of escitalopram.  Oct 2014, upped to 30 mg.

In January 2016, "doctor" added 2mg of Abilify

I had been taking .5 Xanax in AM and PM for a few years

Xanax November 23rd, 2016 .25   5 times per day

Took .5 Ativan in AM and .5 Ativan in PM 10 hours apart for 2 weeks and 2 days. I stopped Ativan on Nov 4th 2016

I cold turkeyed off escitalopram and Abilify on September 4, 2016

i crosses over to 1 mg of Klonopin in Dec 2016. 

Since withdrawal, I have occasionally taken 10mg or 20mg propranolol when my heart was pounding uncontrollably

Supplements Magnesium, Vitamin C, Natural Calm magnesium drink.  Just started  11/16/16 Lactium supplement 167mg at night.

Godiswithme: I'm very scared   Godiswithme: Xanax taper after cold-turkey of Lexapro and Abilify

Jan 2017. Slowly reinstated Lexapro over 4-5 mos to 15mg. Have stayed on that amount. 

Sept 2017. Started tapering 1mg of Klonopin. As of May 2017, I am at .426 mg of Klonopin split into 2 doses per day. 

Link to comment

Pepita- thank you for sharing that with me, it really does help to hear from a professional that this is real and it takes time. I too have done lots of reading. I'm now trying to understand the waves and windows more. I never reinstated in the whole 6 months and I don't plan on doing so but I'll never say never as this is a journey that's unpredictable.

 

Godiswithme - the last few days I've felt much more like me but I agree before that I didnt. I was detached and spaced out just going through the motions.

You can hear my story on the Let's Talk Withdrawal podcast. Its a global weekly podcast created by James Moore that interviews experts and others suffering from the awful effects of psychiatric medication. Here's how to listen...

 

If you have an iPhone, iPad or PC/Mac with iTunes, this link will take you to the iTunes Store where you can subscribe so each new episode will download automatically...

https://goo.gl/Yz7Zmp

Or you can also listen and download each episode here on any device...

http://jfmoore.libsyn.com/

 

Started AD aged 14 (1997)

Stopped AD Escitralopram aged 33 (May 14th 2016) weaned down from 20mg to 1mg

10 months SSRI free since May 2016

Link to comment

Please keep posting. I would love to share in your happiness at moving forward.

in Aug 2014, prescribed 20 mg of escitalopram.  Oct 2014, upped to 30 mg.

In January 2016, "doctor" added 2mg of Abilify

I had been taking .5 Xanax in AM and PM for a few years

Xanax November 23rd, 2016 .25   5 times per day

Took .5 Ativan in AM and .5 Ativan in PM 10 hours apart for 2 weeks and 2 days. I stopped Ativan on Nov 4th 2016

I cold turkeyed off escitalopram and Abilify on September 4, 2016

i crosses over to 1 mg of Klonopin in Dec 2016. 

Since withdrawal, I have occasionally taken 10mg or 20mg propranolol when my heart was pounding uncontrollably

Supplements Magnesium, Vitamin C, Natural Calm magnesium drink.  Just started  11/16/16 Lactium supplement 167mg at night.

Godiswithme: I'm very scared   Godiswithme: Xanax taper after cold-turkey of Lexapro and Abilify

Jan 2017. Slowly reinstated Lexapro over 4-5 mos to 15mg. Have stayed on that amount. 

Sept 2017. Started tapering 1mg of Klonopin. As of May 2017, I am at .426 mg of Klonopin split into 2 doses per day. 

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