Skeeter's Journey

[Skeeter]

Okay, an update.

 

I have spent the last 17 months healing from hell that started, well, 17th months ago.  I knew no happiness for 2-3 YEARS before that, because my AD's had pooped out on me.  In the last 17 months, I have been miserable, as many of us here have been.  I am pleased to say that it has been more tolerable from September '16 to February '17.  Still had periods of intense brain fog, my brain literally felt like a stone at times, pain has been increased from what is normal, and the flares have lasted longer.  But slowly, every so slowly I noticed that the 2 GI issues that started around the time of the Xanax "issue" which I started in Dec '16 then in one day crossed to Valium in April '17; severe lactose intolerance, and an even more severe sensitivity to any and all artificial sweeteners to the point that I would be severely ill for 8 hours after ingesting  it, then would sleep 6 more hours, which finally in the last couple of months has lightened.  I can tolerate milk fully, now (but not other dairy products without enzymes as needed), I also can accidently have artificial sweeteners (aspartame, mannitol, though I can handle Xylitol in Pur gum!!!), but after I found out just how bad they are for a person, I no longer want any of it except the one vice, Xylitol in gum due to dry mouth.

 

I have been without feelings of joy, adoration, or even my normal silliness and "abnormal" infectious humor for over 4 years.  I had even talked to my friends during those 3 years after my AD pooped out and I asked them all if they ever felt excited  or interested about anything, because I noticed that I did not, and that bothered me greatly.  All but one answered that they never felt fun or joy either.  I assumed that  this part of me was over.  And no, not all of the people I asked were on meds/drugs.  Last week, riding home from a doc appt.  I actually noticed that the trees were budding.  I used to get excited at that every year.  After I mentioned this to my friend, I started daydreaming about getting the RV ready for camping (which I have not done in 2 seasons).  Then it hit me, okay, I was not excited, but  I was LOOKING FORWARD TO SOMETHING!!!!  I NOTICED SOMETHING outside myself! Then today in the mail, I got a special stretching band that I purchased a couple of days ago.  I have not danced in 3 years, so why would I buy this pc of apparatus to help get my extension back (flexibility)?  I got excited when it came, pulled it out, and pulled a muscle in my haste to "play" with it, and my reaction? LAUGHTER!!!  Then I wrapped the strap around my leg 3x, at the ankle and pulled the loop over my head, so my neck was holding my leg up, my roomie caught sight, and almost shot soda right out the nose!!!!   Today was pretty good.

 

Yes, I have a long way to go with tapering which will not be starting anytime soon due to other health conditions, but I am emotionally and physically in a place where I can go back to dealing more successfully with the constant pain from my primary health condition, allowing me to live rather than just barely exist.  It is not fun, but life means a lot more this way.  It means I can start to move more and strengthen my muscles, which helps me physically (and, gives me hope for going back to school).

 

Be well!

[peng]

Good to hear, Skeeter!

I am at my happiest, too, when we are wild camping and the weather is good.

You are warmer than us - only 46F here.

Love

peng.

[RachelSusan]

Skeeter,

I'm so sorry to read about the pain and agony you have been through.  Your last post though was very inspirational for me. It helped me immensely.  The fact that you can go through what you went through and now very slowly start to rebuild reminded me that hope still lives.  It lives in all of us and you my friend are the shining light of hope.  Those trees you noticed budding on your trip to the doctor are like a metaphor for all we that have been through with these medications, and for some of us with other very serious health issues.  Thank you for sharing just a little piece of your journey and offering hope by doing so. Thank you for being my "sister" and guiding me when you were going through your own personal dark storm. I knew you hard dark days but I never knew just how bad, and yet you were there for me during your darkest hours. How can I possibly ever thank you?  Let's look forward to a new spring for all of us.  xoxo

RS

[brassmonkey]

It sounds like there has been a good improvement in the ol' WDnormal.  Don't push too hard and injure yourself, but keep at it and push the envelope.  That's how we move forward.  Spend a weekend and just clean out the RV.  Just make it ship shape so when the time comes it won't be a huge project to get it ready to go somewhere.  Maybe this summer a weekend trip or two would be possible.

 

(((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))

[MNgal1960]

I'm so glad to hear your health is improving and you did that, um, stretching thing. You must have been a sight! You have inspired me to get back into my gentle yoga. But only when nobody is looking.

[tntd]

Skeeter, 

 

Your post made me smile. I'm so glad you are finding contentment in your life if not outright happiness. I think being happy only happens in moments anyway so being content is where we want to be  

 

I would have loved to see that stretch, it must be funny if it made your roommated laugh that hard!

 

I love what RS had to say about the metaphor. She is so right. 

 

I hope you continue with your healing and find more moments of joy. 

 

Hugs and healing to you.

[Skeeter]

Thank you all for your wonderful comments!  They make me feel even better.  TBH, I was not sure how it would be taken here that I am on a AD, and a Benzo, but due to another health issue I am choosing not to taper until it is totally taken care of.  I was afraid that I would be looked upon as not trying hard enough.  it may be at least a year before I can start tapering, but will talk about decreasing the AD very slowly to see if that will mess with the general and local anesthetics and possible abx I may need.  If there is not issue, I may start to slowly taper that.  I cannot bear to make thises surgeries/procedures worse than they already are going to suck!

 

Rachel Susan,  it has been noting but a joy to help you go from someone who was fighting to get through every single day back to living, and not fearing how bad your symptoms are going to be every day.  So what If took a little joy in "going big sister" on you, just like your sister, it meant you had all sorts of people who cared looking after you to make sure you got through this okay.  I hope yo will see the flowers budding yourself this spring!  My pain just meant that I understood what you were going through.  Heling you also helped me, as every day you flet a little better was a small victory for me, too!  You even did your last taper without consulting me- I am so proud of you!!

 

Peng,  So, my dear sir, you are into wild camping...?  Well, so are most of my friends!  With my health issue, I HAVE to be where I can precisely control the temperature, humidity, and get out of the wind and rain.  I wish I could say I hated "glamping" (glamorous camping), but I love it just a wee bit too much!  38' of fun and comfort, while my friends are close in their tents, but let me tell you when straight line winds hit, guess who gets a knock on her door?  LOL!!!  The pups adore the RV. One is co-pilot.  He literally throws a fit If he is not buckled into the passenger seat to navigate for J!  He lays in his bed, and loves to watch the scenery!!  Once we park, and get leveled out with the hydraulics (our old RV never had that, so we would drive around to find a flat spot...lol!!), and the pups will wait until it is level and firm!  They do not seem to like it when it rocks as they run around and chase each other  it is all fun until someone gets hurt!!!  I actually think they wait for the hydraulics, because they know the sliders go out next, and they have 1/3 more space to run in.  This is TMI, but too funny not to share.  AT home, with the little rug rats, I never go to the bathroom alone, whether showering, brushing my teeth, or doing other business.  Well the very last time we went camping, for the firs time we had 3 dogs, all who tried to follow me into an RV bathroom when I had to use the facilities.  Luckily they re all at 10 lbs or under.  one stood on the floor in front of me, and 2 went into the bathtub, and that is the way it was every single time after that.  Gosh forbid I try to sneak by myself in the middle of the night, they would start to howl on the (tall) bed, until I cam back out and let them down, so they could come jump in the tub.  All for 30 seconds!  They all make me laugh so hard!!!

 

tntd,  yep, I am regretting the stretch, but not much- seeing my roommate laughing that hard was well worth the soreness.  They did not send the promised PDF catalogue  via email to give me their ideas, so I got a little too creative!

 

MNgal,  Yep- there is a reason to do it alone- I have learned that after seeing the look on my pal's face!  Then again, I always really did want to see soda come out of someone's nose!

 

Brass, You underestimate me!  Ole Bertha will be out every chance we can this year.  I have 2 years to make up for.  Luckily I live in a beautiful state (if one goes north), and WI is gorgeous, too, so only a few hours of driving, and with my camping pal's work schedule, we go on 4-6 day trips.  Les see if I can beat your "couple of weekends" challenge...lol!!!

 

Thank you all for your support.  I never dreamed that my noticing the buds on the trees would touch others too.  I have been so wrapped up in myself that even the leaves on the trees last year brought me ZERO joy.  That is so unlike me.  Even when the AD pooped out, I still liked the leaves. If you all are lucky, I will get myself wrapped up in my band and post a pic...lol- you would have to be VERY lucky!!

 

((((HUGS))))) to ALL!!!

S.

[tntd]

I love your dogs. The stories of their antics are wonderful. I have a German Shepherd and she follows me into the bathroom too so I know how that goes. Not in the middle of the night though. What joy they must bring you. I'm glad you've had them to help you through the rough times. I hope you have a wonderful time wandering around in your RV this summer. It sounds wonderful. I'm so excited you have gotten to a place in your recovery that this is a possibility for you. It gives us all hope, you give us all hope.

 

Thank you  

 

Hugs and continued healing in all your areas of need. 

[Survivor1]

Hi Skeeter,

 

I read your post in the Symptoms section about Benzos vs AD's.  What a horrible experience!  I hope you are doing well in the circumstances.

 

A question for you:  do you think after all the turmoil you had in such a short time that you have/had kindled? And are you having any trouble tapering?

 

I'm afraid that I have kindled and am worried about a taper that I must begin (suspected serotonin toxicity) despite not being stable.  Just looking for encouragement.

 

Thank you!

[Survivor1]

Hi, sorry I had not read your thread above.  I see that you have paused tapering.  I wish you continued healing.

[AliG]

Hi Skeeter.  What can I say except that I understand. I haven't been through the exact same circumstances but I know enough to be able to empathize and commiserate.

 

I have had the pain also. We are survivors.

 

You do seem capable and able to navigate your way through this. It can take some time but I know you're up for it . Stay strong. You will get there in the end. 

Hugs,

Ali

[Skeeter]

 You all leave such warm, heartfelt messages on my thread.  I always appreciate them.

 

Dog stories...  My first papillon was named Gizmo.  He hated stairs, so he learned to climb them backwards. I never thought much of it until we got our first RV.  We were kind of celebrities at the RV parks to all of the kids, because all of the kids wanted to watch him do his backwards hop up the steps.  Then I had to stay at a Country Inn and Suites for a month, and they had a 2 story staircase in the lobby that you could see through (in between) the steps, and all loved watching the one dog go forwards, and the other one go backwards, in his bunny hop style.  I had the managers, both day and night in giggles each time.  They are the cutest dogs with the greatest personality, for sure.  As for intelligence, they are the "herding dogs" of the toy category.  They can think independently, and actually have been and can be trained as herding dogs for sheep.  Gizmo knew the names of over 30 toys, and would bring each toy if you just gave him the name, he would stick his snout in his toy basket and find the right one.  To train him for a new toy, it was simple.  Say it was a rabbit.  We would play with it, and say, "Go get the New toy, the rabbit, go get it", and he would fetch it.  A couple of rounds of that, and it would be locked in to his memory.  He has been gone for many years, but people still bring him up to talk about all of his tricks.  He just loved learning new tricks, it was great!

 

 

Survivor,

I plan on reading your thread, and seeing if there is anything I can help with.  I a sure the mods on your case are doing a fantastic job, but it never hurts to have a second, or fifth pair of eyes taking a look.  It will take me a while to read, but you are on my list!

 

Ali,

You are right, we may not have the same story, but yes, we do all go through the same type of situations, and it is just awful, as we would not wish these experiences on our worst enemies, would we?

 

tntd,

I will hope to give you all joy living vicariously through me on my mini trips on the RV.  I am surprised that I am looking forward to going this year, as last year, I did not even make it out there.  In the summer, I usually use that like my little cabin, I set it up in the driveway, and it is my quiet time to do crafts, or just enjoy the outside more, as there are so many windows, I like being out there!

 

 

Thanks all!!

Skeeter

[Gridley]

I've read your thread and can see that you are a very kind and strong person.  You will make it through this in your own time.  Always be kind to yourself.

 

We are in a similar place in tapering, as I am also coming off 20mg Lexapro, with a benzo waiting in the wings for future work. I have found the Gemini II scale  to work very well for exact shaving off the Lexapro tablet to get your reduced dosage, whatever that may be.

 

Many healing vibes for your stabilizing and tapering when you feel ready to start.

[Skeeter]

Thank you Gridley,

That is very kind.  I have a different scale off of ebay, but also have a very expensive reloading scale that I will doublecheck my weight on, so I think I will be okay.  My friend spared no expense on his reloading scale, so I am sure it will be great.  Will add your thread on my "to read" list.

 

Be well!

Skeeter

[tntd]

What a wonderful dog story, thank you for sharing. 

 

I for one will love living vicariously through you as I am trapped in my house for now. I'm hoping to get a window as I haven't had one in three months and the last one was only three hours long. I remember it fondly though. It gives me hope that I will be back out there like you are. You give me hope. I'm glad you have been able to stabilize and be functional again. 

 

Hugs and continued healing

[Skeeter]

Tntd,

Could this state the lack in windows be at all associated with the weather?  I have a hard time every singe winter since I moved to this state, myself.  To me it is the bleakness with the trees with no leaves, the grey skies, the lack of sunlight, and I cannot make it outside due to pain that comes with the cold.  You have to take extra steps to go outside, and you freeze at stores until your car warms up.  We cannot just go outside and stargaze in comfort, or go for a nice rejuvenating walk, because it sucks to walk in the snow,  Even f you are agoraphobic, you can still go sit outside, if you have a balcony or a yard and at least breathe fresh air.  Maybe this could be a  part for you, or is just as bad all year round? Your last window was around the Holidays, and before that, maybe during warmer weather?  I have issues once the trees change colors on.

Skeeter

[tntd]

Hi Skeeter,

 

That is a thought. This is my first winter after the cold turkey. It was in September that my windows really started to disappear. Since then I've only had really tiny windows, like the one in December. It was about three hours long. I can't believe how much I long for even a tiny window like that right now. A reprieve. I suppose we shall see what happens as the weather starts to change. I have horrible allergies though so spring is not my favorite time, except that I can get outside like you said without having to put on layers of clothes and still be freezing! Over the summer and when it was nice out in the fall I would go outside in my backyard when I was able to. It should be interesting to see what happens. Thanks for your thoughts on this. It's interesting that you have more problems as soon as the leaves start changing. It makes me wonder if it has something to do with sun exposure. Do you use a sun lamp at all?

 

How is your arm doing? Has it been feeling better and starting to heal?

 

Hugs 

[MNgal1960]

(((Skeeter))) So sorry to read about Bugs.

[Skeeter]

Sorry you two. I have taken a break from the site to care for my little sweet-pea Bugs. I never expected her to live this long, honestly. She is sleeping most of the time, but still a lover, kissing all of the time when she is up.

I am slowly coming back as I can, taking breaks as I need, as she is still losing her fight, but I can no longer, in good conscience take all of the time for myself. I am needed elsewhere.

 

tntd, no light yet.  I would not have had the wits about me to use it regularly this past winter, as I still shy away from light, but next winter, for sure. My arm has gotten t the point where it no longer feels like someone is shoving a knitting needle into the joint all of the time, now only  "some" of the time...lol!

 

MN, thank you for your kind words about Bugs.  They are very much appreciated,  I have bought jewelry to keep a bit of her cremains on me all the time for a while like I did with my last pup.  It helped me a ton.

 

UPDATE:  Can hear crickets and frogs at night (live by a pond)!  It has been warm enough on several nights for me to go out and sit on the porch while Bugs did her thing in the middle of the night, and it was night to hear bugs of the warmer months.  Then we had a very cold night, but something was still making noise, so we are past the complete silence of the winter months!!  Gotta LOVE that!!!  Making plans for the coming months, something I could not imagine doing this time last year, as I was living moment by moment. We have trips to the drive in theater planned, and hopefully camping in Big Bertha while towing Mini Me!  J has consented to help me exercise once it is warm enough every day to do it.  He will walk the dogs, and I will push the doggie stroller for when their little legs give out, so I can get enough exercise!  If Bugs is still with is, she will be in the stroller. I would like one last walk with her riding along, enjoying the scents, so come on warm weather!!!  My sleep has deteriorated due to a injury in the household, I am caring for all of the dogs all of the time, something I am not used to, and Bugs is heavy as she is totally relaxed when held, so not holding her own weight  is hard on me until I put her down on the grass, where she walks and stands, an sniffs the air in pure ecstasy!  She even barks at the cars that dare to stop at the stop sign facing HER yard...lol!

 

Current symptoms: photophobia, agoraphobia, but on a much more mild scale than "normal" for the last 18 months, little motivation to get up and "do", aversions to doing certain things that come and go for no reason.

New things I am doing:  stretching with a ballet band (96" circle of rubbery stretchy goodness), working on strengthening with therabands, as I am deconditioned.  Walking to start soon!

 

Be well!

S

[Skeeter]

My little 16 .5 year old dog passed. I am okay.

 

Before she died, I ended up getting a sinus headache of epic proportions from crying.  I needed a sinus med so was handed a bottle of Chlor-tabs (I took 1), but those are 4mg antihistamine pills, not what I needed, (I was in almost migraine-like severe pain, I have touchy sinuses when crying, so I was photophobic and could not see hardly at all) so about 90 minutes later, I took 2 Mucinex pills.   Within 60 minutes broke out in a cold sweat,  had severe nausea, could not think straight, was dizzy, and I was confused for about one to two hours.  Today, I am feeling like I am in sometimes minimal, sometimes moderate withdrawal that I relate to being like benzo WD (no drug effects between these 2 meds or ANY of my other meds that would account for this as per an interaction check).

 

Now let me add one more caveat that might.  I wondered about this issue before the above happened, but I may have filled my pill dispenser with 7 days of pills and may have substituted an almost identical looking pill for my Valium.  I am now day 3 into my normal mix, which includes 15mg of Valium a day, and I am feeling very "off",  I fell asleep and napped a few times, having awful dreams, and needing to stretch when I awoke, but stretching each time threw my body into exactly how I felt when I switched benzo's in a day, and was dealing with the aftermath when it was not so bad like month 4, and my normal pain is increased 2x since yesterday, and my whole body is achy, severe cog fog at times (not related to grief, this is much more profound), GI upset. I know sometimes you have to be removed from a situation to see a pattern, or something you yourself are missing, and I am feeling just awful. 90 minutes after awakening, I am feeling a bit more like normal, but still have significant cog fog lingering. Took forever to type this, and to do the drug interaction check, (because I could not remember my normal meds).

 

Any ideas?  If it was the Valium, is there anything I should do, or did I just have a odd effect from the other pills on an empty stomach?  Note, I only ate once yesterday, and it was at 8 am, this was probably 11pm, and I was too ill to eat (I had been hungry, but the sinus pain was quite severe, and so eating was NOT happening). Today, feeling "off", so ate once.

 

There may be no answer to this, but was reaching out, because I am terrified that I forgot last weeks Valium, and I do not know what will happen.

 

Thanks to all!

 

UPDATE:  As time is passing (a few hours since this got bad) I am feeling more myself, but still have a bit of the awful feeling following me around, but like today, it came in waves, but not the same time as grief, except coincidentally.

[RachelSusan]

Skeeter,

I'm sorry for the loss of your little dog. They truly are our children.  I hope you get an answer to your above post, and most importantly some relief.

RS

[Skeeter]

Thanks RS.  I have been gone caring for my little sweet pea.  I have relief that she is not suffering anymore, and only got teary a couple of times today.  I do not think I will grieve her like my last dog, who I was not ready to let go of, but his heart condition had other ideas.  I made peace with the fact that it was her time.  I have a necklace where a little of her cremains will go into, so I can have her with me.  Did the same with that last dog, and it, to me was so helpful to have something to grab onto, guite literally when I was missing him.

 

Thank you so much.  I hope to hang around now.  Have missed ya!

 

How are you doing?

[peng]

Sorry to read of your sinus and grieving pain, Skeeter.  And now your doubts about the medication you have been taking. 

 

All I can offer is that sinusitis - heck! - I have just had the worst 3 months of it in my life.  Only 3 different courses of antibiotics cleared it - and I am opposed to them - what a bummer.

 

Still, as my old Uncle Alec (RIP) said, when banging your head off a brick wall, "it's great when you stop"!

 

As a nature lover and keeper of many diverse pets from the usual, to amphibians, turtles and even a blue freshwater lobster, try to be philosophical (hard, I guess).  One of the penalties of forming relationships with, say, cats and dogs is that they have relatively short lives.  I attended the putting down of our daughter's terrier (Gabby) with my wife and daughter.  As a "scientific person",  I did not expect to be moved, but felt the tears running down my cheeks when I saw 22-yo daughter affected the same way.

 

Never mind, we got over it.  I can assure you, the moment of death was absolutely imperceptible following an injection administered by a supremely caring vetinary nurse.

 

As for your drug confusion, I too have had some worrying times.  I try to be methodical, but my memory is failing and on occasion, I have forgotten to take the Venlafaxine.  I usually know, because I have a restless night with vivid and strange dreams.  (Even stranger than those from WD.)

 

Love and sincere best wishes for better times, coming your way soon, I am sure, skeets!

 

peng. 

[Skeeter]

Peng,

Thanks for the kind words!  I just love when you visit me, you have so much wisdom.  I picked papillons and a (rescue) Chihuahua because of their long life span.  16.5 years is a long time, and they can live longer, but her body gave out, sadly.  I am doing okay.  The waves of grief are pretty minor, as I went through most of the stages of grief while she was still here, but they can pop up again at any time.

 

Thank you so much for stopping by.  You are my favorite rocker!  I cannot believe the people you have seen in concert, so cool!!

 

Take it easy with your taper, and give yourself an extra long break if you need to.  Hang in there, buddy!

XOXO

Skeets

[Shep]

My little 16 .5 year old dog passed. I am okay.

 

 

 

Skeeter . . . 

 

 

I needed a sinus med so was handed a bottle of Chlor-tabs (I took 1), but those are 4mg antihistamine pills, not what I needed, (I was in almost migraine-like severe pain, I have touchy sinuses when crying, so I was photophobic and could not see hardly at all) so about 90 minutes later, I took 2 Mucinex pills.  

 

 

 

This could be an adverse reaction. I put Lexapro, Valium, chlorpheniramine (the main ingredient in Chlor-tabs), and Mucinex in the drug interaction checker and it brought up moderate interactions including: 

 

Using chlorpheniramine together with escitalopram (Lexapro) may increase side effects such as dizziness, drowsiness, confusion, and difficulty concentrating.

 

Using diazepam (Valium) together with chlorpheniramine may increase side effects such as dizziness, drowsiness, confusion, and difficulty concentrating.

 

I may have filled my pill dispenser with 7 days of pills and may have substituted an almost identical looking pill for my Valium.  I am now day 3 into my normal mix, which includes 15mg of Valium a day, and I am feeling very "off", 

 

 

 

This is a link to a Pill Identifier:

 

https://www.drugs.com/imprints.php

 

Can you plug in the information and see if what you have is Valium? 

 

If not, I would dispose of the mystery pills, just to be safe.

 

Sending healing vibes your way, Skeeter. I'm really sorry for your loss and hope you feel better soon. 

[Skeeter]

Shep,

Luckily, I do know what the "mystery pills" are, they just are the same size and almost same color as the Valium (which used to be pink until I changed pharmacies, now are  a very pale yellow, other is white). I am careful with my meds, but once in a while I will make an oops and not check the color under the light. With the soft white bubs, you cannot see the difference unless right under the bulb) The other pills are not an issue, and are in my daily regimen, too. I will do a pill count, but since I get 90 days at a time, it is time consuming to do is all, and I was not with it enough to check. I had such an odd mix of signs and symptoms together, maybe the not eating was part of it, as I cannot deny the timing to the sinus piils. If we take out the nausea and sweating, and attribute that to the pain, it does make total sense. Not sure is Chlor-tabs is the real name (sorry, I did not realize that anyone would duplicate my work, as not all meds are listed here), I had the actual chemical name, and ran all of my meds and had 4 duplications of that same warning of dizziness and confusion). Sorry about that, but thank you for your work!!!  It does make sense, though!  Relieves my mind.

Thanks for the message about the pup. Much appreciated.

Skeeter

[tntd]

Hi Skeeter,

 

I'm so sorry to hear about your fur baby. They are with us for such a short time but touch us in such profound ways. How lucky the two of you were to have each other to love. 

 

I hope that you have recovered from your adventures in medication for your sinuses. 

 

You are in my heart.

 

Hugs and healing

T

[Skeeter]

Thank you for all of your lovely notes  bothe before and after me losing my sweet-pea- Bugs.  Cremains are home, and so that is very good.

 

I am sorry I have not been making my rounds for all of you that I adore so much.  Within 10 days (7 days?) of Bugs passing, my J had an emergency MRI.  He needs an emergent spinal fusion (C5-C6, C4-C5 are already fused).  it will be done in May, we see the ortho on May first for the referral to the neuro- gotta jump through the insurance hoops. The nerve is slowly being strangled right now, so they need to get him in soon I am not used to caring for the household myself.  J expects me to stay in the hospital with him the entire time, (just 2 days, but no sleep for 2 days means severe pain) so am a bit stressed, as that will leave me to board our 2  currently grieving (remaining) dogs.  For you that are rolling your eyes right now, I chose not to have children, so my fur babies are VERY important to me. No, not "real kids", but we adore them very much.

 

So this is not a complete downer, I do want to tell you all what happened to me on the way home from my Doc appointment Last Thursday (8 days ago?).  The trees are realy budding now.  Sadly I chose to ay at home and be there or Bugs every moment since my last appointment, so I had not really been out.  She passed that Monday, and I went to the doc Thursday, and I got a surge of energy on the way home, I wanted to go to a big pet store to bring home new toys and new treats and toys for the dogs, to cheer them up a bit.  While in the pet store, I happened to notice the ferrets.  I have brought out my spring cane (clear acrylic with pink and blue flowers on the inside- cool 3D effect!  Well the ferrets caught sight of the handle, and all of them kept falling over the others to climb each other higher to look throught the clear handle, as it distorts the light.  They were enthralled!!  Then they put on a major clown show just for J and I, they were fighting, and squishing each other and biting each others bums and ears and backs, and just as I was explaining to J how when they get really excited, they do a bouncing, bounding run with their back arched in the air (they look like an upside down U, and suddenly they were all doing it. LOVED IT!  I was just giggling so hard that others in the store came to see what I was laughing at, and soon we had like 8 people sharing a fun laugh at the antics of these 4 little imps.  Most fun I had in months!!!  Got some great toys and treats for the pups, and they LOVED everything, even the toys, so it was a good trip.  The trees in my back yard- all leaves are at about 1/2 way there, so I loved to see that, and soon the frogs will be big enough to suction cup themselves to the windows at night to catch the bugs attracted by the light.  it is a riot to come home at night and see like 10 frogs (total) stuck to the 4 windows, seeing  them clearly outlined through the closed but lit from within beige blinds. Yay Spring!!

 

I am not really up to replying n my own thread right at the moment, so please forgive any delayed responses on my end.  I may have to wait and reply from the hospital, depending on how quick he can get in. I have to help him with even basic tasks at the moment, so I will do what I can!! SO glad that I chose to hold, as I would not be able to deal with this AND WD!!!  YAY for that!!!

[brassmonkey]

(((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))

[tntd]

Hi Skeeter,

 

I have children and furbabies and I get how they are like kids too. I hate leaving mine alone or boarding her. I'm sorry to hear you are now having problems with J though I loved the ferret story. Sounds like you have your hands full. I will be thinking of you.

 

Hugs and healing to you and J

[peng]

Skeets, peace, and keep getting better!

 

My last (adopted) turtle was found dead at bottom of pond the other morning.

Spring is here, but some individuals have passed away in other years when the temperature starts rising, and before they feed after the 6-month or so winter sulk.

The pond is outside so I wasn't sitting up with her all night outside in my PJs, or anything!! - neighbours have already seen plenty of weirdness, even if I had been doing that!

Mind you, the little girl next door used to say, "I wish we had a garden like yours." when she visited.

 

Central Scotland ain't the Louisiana bayous, but I did my best for all of those terrapins.

 

I look on the bereavement as when one door closes and another opens.

This morning I visited the local pet shop and bought 10 goldfish who will now have a veggie-filtered 50 litre pond.  Oh, sharing it with a few frogs at times, from what I saw when draining pond this morning.

 

Best wishes - remember life goes on!

XO

[MNgal1960]

So sorry to hear of your troubles, Skeeter. Thinking of you.

 

MN

[Skeeter]

Thank you all for your lovely and kind responses. I am in a severe cog fog. Thought I was past all of that since I am still on the drugs, but I guess the symptoms can still pop up in times of stress, as an injury has been done.

 

You are all so kind to look in on me. Oh Peng, your poor turtle! You gave him happiness while he as still here by adopting the little fella!

 

I hope all of you are making it through everything okay. I am a bit brain dead, so only stepping in when I am able here.

 

Best wishes to al of you, and thank you so much!!

Skeeter

[MNgal1960]

Thinking of you, Skeeter. 

[tntd]

Just wanted to pop in and say hi. I hope that things are going ok for you.

 

Healing hugs,

T

[peng]

Likewise!

O