Neverending13

[neverending13]

Hi all!

 

I've been lurking for two years following a slow measured taper and really excelling until February '16 when I assumed my tapers had caught up with me and I was hit with anxiety and panic accompanied with nice muscle twitches, tremors and spasms. I'd awaken early with cortisol mornings, sweats and the other lovely physical symptoms of anxiety and panic.

 

I, like many others, have never experienced these and mistook the panic attacks for anything I could find. Being a 48 year old female doctors and friends all want to blame this on menopause, but I know better and so do you. =) One endocrinologist thought sudden onset thryoiditis and I was hopeful of that because I'd tapered by the book. Sigh. 

 

Anyway in March I updosed by 15mg and got some some relief but not enough. After six weeks I added 5mg on April 15 and that seemed to do the trick until yesterday, back to panic and anxiety.

 

The twitching and tremors did die down and dissipate over this time but I have also been visiting an acupuncturist and have been happy with my time there.

 

The week before this second wave of anxiety set in, the twitching ramped up, my mood noticeably fell. I'm at 58.5 mg down from my original 150 mg and really felt great until panic hit me yesterday and I caved with an emergency benzo which I avoid at all costs.

 

My question- updose again? 10mg? Or bring my dose to 75 to where approximately the occupancy rate for Effexor kicks in?

 

I work in an elementary school and am due back next week and cannot be fighting panic and anxiety at the start of a new school year!

 

[scallywag]

Hi Neverending13 -- Welcome to Surviving Antidepressants (SA)

 

Thanks for stepping out of "lurk-dom" to post.  Thanks too for completing a signature -- your time observing the site shows.

 

Have you read our topic The Windows and Waves pattern of stabilization?

 

A reinstatement (RI) can sometimes resolve symptoms; sometimes RI reduces the intensity and constant presence of symptoms. It sounds as if your RI and CNS (central nervous system) are interacting in the second way -- windows of minimal/manageable symptoms interspersed with waves of more intense symptoms. Generally the best approach to waves is to ride them out with Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

 

It seems as if each time you've updosed, you've achieved a short-term truce with anxiety only to have it recur.  You're asking about how much to updose to deal with the anxiety that has broken through after a 4-month "truce." 

 

Your knowledge of your body's response and your intuition on this are probably better than any suggestion we can make.  I wish I could be more help; one of the more experienced moderators may have an idea for you.

[neverending13]

Yes Scallywag exactly- a four month truce!

 

Thank you for the links, it is nice to have them available in one click as I usually click around and then forget where I found different info!

 

 I have dealt with a month of stuff but mentally felt fine, same as I did in February until the bottom dropped. The twitching upsets me but I'm 85% sure it's med/ wave related and my neurologist appt in October will confirm this especially with the big wave of symptoms showing up this week and then the boom of anxiety. 

 

I worry (of course) the fear from the previous 'time' is clouding my judgement.

 

 

Some reservations are: going up means tapering further later. Yet I do see many people do have to re-instate back up to an original or therapeutic dose, and begin again. I suppose I shouldn't be worrying about that right now. =) In hind sight I was right to move from 10% to micro-cuts but should have held longer between drops. I was kind of following Brassmonkey's schedule but slower, 3- 5% for 3 to 4 weeks. Now I would hold 6 - 8 weeks before dropping again, of course that is way in future!!! 

 

IF i were to go with my intuition, I suspect 10mg may not be enough and the "truce" will fall apart again, but of course there are no guarantees of any kind with these drugs, and 75 may be fine too, for a bit or it will be enough to hold. I so don't want to head anywhere near 150.

[JanCarol]

Hey Neverending - you can keep going up and up and every 4 months (and this time may shorten) the truce will end.

 

Have you considered going down again?

 

There is no "magic dose" that will solve all of your withdrawal problems.  You just have to find a dose which is bearable, and take it from there.  HOLD through the symptoms, accept the symptoms, and let them pass.  They will pass, like clouds across the sky.

 

You may take comfort from Dr. Claire Weekes - Recovering from a Sensitized Nervous System

[neverending13]

Jan,

 

Thanks so much for stopping by, your words mean a lot!

 

I guess I thought tapering slowly would make me immune to any and all discomfort! To have panic set in like that over night was frightening. In February when I first experienced it, it came during weeks of "supposed" health problems that I now believe were withdrawal symptoms and magnified over weeks. I'd never experienced anxiety like that and my mother and friend helped me to see what it was--anxiety and panic. When it re-occurred out of the blue when holding, I was shocked.

 

Your advice is right and welcomed.

 

I had a long talk with my parents (and myself) over the weekend and if this is to be a an obstacle, I must prepare myself for it and begin forming a tool box to cope. I am a relative newbie in this anxiety/panic journey and basically I freaked. I have updosed and will hold here wiser that I probably can not escape this and will need to accept and prepare for more.

 

I thank you for Claire's link. I was just thinking yesterday as I walked that I needed to find it and bookmark it so you having done that is a gift-thanks!

 

Acceptance is going to be the only way through this, along with diligent self care which I sometimes neglect when I'm feeling fine. My dear friend K suffers with severe panic and anxiety and told me she must do hard cardio exercise in the morning before work to ease her symptoms, almost as if the physical exertion must match the internal energy in order for her body to relax and let go and my mother and I discussed anxiety almost being the same kind of energy one can also experience during times of great excitement and productivity just with negative thoughts behind it instead of enjoyment. Most of us love the energy that comes with excitement and enjoyment, but hate the energy when it comes with fear. I'm going to try to remember it is just energy, neither good nor bad and it will pass with time.

 

I feel a small bit bad for panicking and updosing so soon but remind myself I have no experience in this particular area and after spending most of the winter paralyzed in fear I was scared. I have to remind myself I am stronger than I feel, and have made it through many obstacles and will make it through this. Every set back brings new learning and more experience and desensitization to immediate threats, hopefully like the first time your child gets sick. You are sure they are dying until you head to the doctor's and see a whole waiting room full of coughing sick children and worried mothers. The light hits you that you are just one of many and it is a simple cold and not the deadly kookamonga virus you feared! Later you reach the level of thinking- Poor kid, a cold, let's give it a week. 

 

Again thank you for posting, any reassurance that I am not alone and spiraling down to Crazyville is most welcome. It really helps to know I'm not alone and other have made it and survived, and have tools they can share.

[Kay]

hello 

neverending13

I am working on gathering potential plaintiffs to form a lawsuit against the drug company Pfizer for side effects caused by Effexor XR related to nerve pain and muscle movements. It sounds like you may be an eligible plaintiff, from the description you've written of symptoms...if you are interested in joining the lawsuit as a potential plaintiff...please read my post here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/12939-effexor-xr-tardive-dyskinesia-lawsuit/  and message me! Thank you.