Ketiperri: Horrible cognitive and emotional symptoms

[Ketiperri]

**  merged from other intro topic **

 

Hi , I'm new here . I received mirtazapine , finished one year ago . since there is severe memory loss , no memory , short-term memory , emotions , I can not plan, organize , executive function impairment , etc . I just 0-24 in bed . please help me , I do not want to live like that .

Edited September 22, 2016 by ChessieCat

[scallywag]

**  merged from other intro topic **

 

Ketiperri -- Welcome to Surviving Antidepressants (SA)

 

I've moved your post from the introduction topic of another member (Jams) to your own introduction so that we can get to know your situation and so that all your questions and information are in one place.

I hope you'll find the information in the SA forums helpful for your situation. I'm sorry that you are in the position that you need the information, but am glad that you found us.
 
I'm sorry to hear that your symptoms are continuing in this way a year after stopping mirtazapine.  How did you stop taking the medication -- did you

• take the full dose as prescribed, then one day stopped and took nothing after that?
• reduce the dose in several steps over a number of weeks?

Are you taking any other medications prescribed by a doctor for any condition, any medications that you can buy at a pharmacy such as for allergies or sleep, or any street or "recreational" drugs?

A request: Would you summarize your history in a signature -- drugs, doses, dates, and discontinuations & reinstatements, in the last 12-18 months particularly? Any drugs prior to that can just be listed with start and stop years. Please put your withdrawal history in signature

The symptoms you are experiencing are common after discontinuing a drug such as mirtazapine and other psychiatric, neuroactive medications.
What is withdrawal syndrome

You'll find a list of symptoms in the attachments in the first post of this thread:
Glenmullen’s withdrawal symptom list

 

This may also have helpful information for you:
Tips for tapering off Remeron (mirtazapine)

Edited September 22, 2016 by ChessieCat

[Ketiperri]

**  merged from other intro topic  **

 

hi . It was a symptom of someone that did not work after waking up in the brain , and decreased night ? Thanks

Edited September 22, 2016 by ChessieCat
moved from Brain fog topic in Symptoms

[Ketiperri]

hi, I'm Keti. I'm 26 years old. I speak english a little bit, sorry. I was mirtazapin in August 2015 because i had anxious. It was a terrible reaction. while on the drug, I was confused, I lost my emotions, sexuality, I could not concentrate, etc. I just got this only 38 days. In September 2015 came out cold turkey, since life is hell. No memory and short term memory at all, no feelings, sexual dysfunction, I can not concentrate, plan, think logically, there is no imagination, temporal and spatial disorientation, impaired executive function, I can not learn. I just in my bed. I was 5 my attempt suicide. I was in the hospital from February to August 2016, I received different antidepressants, antipsychotics, nootropics (vinpocetine, sermion, nootropil), but nothing helped my symptomps. in the morning when I wake up, my brain is not working. the evening of the symptoms are reduced. Does anyone have a similar experience? there is hope that it heals? thank you a lot of strength to everyone

[ChessieCat]

Hi Ketiperri,

 

Welcome to SA (Surviving Antidepressants).  Are you taking any drugs now?  Are you taking any supplements or vitamins?  Did you take any drugs before August 2015?

 

Please put your Withdrawal History in Signature.  It may be difficult for you to provide all of the information asked for so give as much as you can.  Please try to include details of all drugs, dates and doses for the last 12-18 months including how you decreased (eg did you fast taper or cold turkey?).

 

Have you read this:  One Theory of Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome

 

The brain is an amazing thing.  Recovery from withdrawal syndrome is gradual, inconsistent, and can take a long time.  It is a good idea to learn Non-drug techniques to cope.  Please also see Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

This is your Intro/Update topic where you can ask questions and journal your progress.

[Ketiperri]

hi chessiecat . thanks for the reply. I do not take any medicines or vitamins now. I try supplements (omega3, B vit, mg, inositol, etc) and try drugs (psilocibin, mdma) last year, but these are not help my symptomps. It was not any medication before mirtazapine . my memory is so horrible , that sometimes I get lost in my own home . I always feel that I 'm crazy . I can not do nothing. I thought , trying to gain a dopamine agonist , may improve memory and executive functions. I know that dopamine agonists can be very harmful, but it can not live . I do not know what to do. I can not believe that there is no solution .

[Chuck83]

Hi Ketiperri, Unfortunately in psychiatric hospitals give terrible mix of drugs, I had a friend who after a hospitalization resulting Depo' injection , it took him several months to recover. I hope that also you too will find what works for you, and you have a complete recovery.

[Ketiperri]

I feel it's frontal and temporal lobe lobotomy . there is no planning , memory , imagination , learning, creativity , emotion, orientation, normal thinking. I lost everything. I do not feel the outside world , I can not leave the house . I 'd like another world , my brain is empty , there is no memorial . as if I had never lived in this house. it s terrible. Similar symptoms were someone else ? it goes away ? no one knows

[JanCarol]

Hey Keti, I'm sorry you are struggling.  I know it seems like a long time.

 

These are common cognitive symptoms of antidepressant withdrawal - probably complicated by the other drugs (nootropics, psychedelics).  

 

Unfortunately, the best tools for survival are time, and distraction.

 

Find something, even if it's one thing, like knitting, that you love to do, and do that while you wait.

 

I know, that sounds trite.  Here are discussions of what some other people experience, called Depersonalisation / Derealization:

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1766-derealizationdepersonalization/

 

and here's an article in Psychology Today, which describes it very well:

Do You Feel like a Stranger to Yourself? Elena Bezzabova (Psych Today article on SA)

 

Here is another article that talks about the feelings that you don't want to do anything, that nothing is good or pleasurable:  Anhedonia Apathy Demotivation  I had this for the longest time.  I thought nothing would ever "feel good" or even "feel" again.

 

There are a few small things you can try.  How is your sleep?  Are you sleeping okay?    Sleep will help your brain heal and help the time pass.  How is your diet?  

 

Many of us have been helped by Magnesium and Omega-3 fish oil.  In your case, I think the fish oil is especially important, to help heal your white matter, neurons, and help speed your process.

 

If you can, challenge yourself in small ways.  Play with your senses.  Look at colours.  Feel beautiful textures, like your favourite blanket or sweater.  Taste something - really savour it.  Smell some lavender or vanilla.  Listen to soothing music.  This it the beginning of Mindfulness and Acceptance.  Mindfulness won't fix the problem, but it will help you to survive it.

 

I hope you see the sun today.

[Ketiperri]

thanks for the help. I wrote this email Yolanda Australian psychiatrist , and she said most people recovery. I'm trying to do things but my brain very bad. I can sleep a lot, but in the morning my brain frozen... I sometimes I take omega 3 , vitamin b or c . you recovery ? what were your symptoms? how long ? Have a nice day

[scallywag]

** merged from other intro topic **

 

Keti - I've moved your post to your introduction thread to try to understand your question. 

 

Would you write more about the situation so that we can help you or answer your question?

Edited September 22, 2016 by ChessieCat

[ChessieCat]

Jan recently hurt one of her hands so isn't able to type much at the moment.  This is the link to JanCarol's topic:  JanCarol - Reboxetine first, then lithium.

[JanCarol]

Hey KetiPerri - I finished my slow, 2-3 year long taper off psych drugs in February.  I also lost my thyroid and ovaries while I was drug-numbed, which is causing more compex health problems as I age.  (so I am as angry at surgeons as I am at psychiatrists!)

 

Before that, I also tapered statins, PPI's (stomach acid drugs) and quit cigarettes.  All in all about a 4 year journey.  Also, I wanted to let you know that mirtazapine was one of the drugs I have experience with - I was only on low dose amounts for sleep (at below 15-30 mg, mirtazapine acts more as an antihistamine, makes you sleepy.  Weirdly, the less you take, the sleepier you get!).  

 

So I need to ask you:  how is your sleep?  Insomnia can contribute greatly to derealisation.  

 

When I signed on, I was completely anhedonic.  I didn't know what the word was until I came to SA and read the thread I posted for you.  Nothing gave me pleasure.  In fact, things that should give me pleasure were awful.

 

I would go for a massage, and I hated it.  I knew it should feel good, but it was difficult to feel anything at all, and so, knowing this should be pleasurable, should feel good, made the massage worse.  It was unbearable!

 

Some of that was trust issues with my body, and betrayal of my body from traumas, but some of it was just the awfulness of feeling nothing.  I actually had to learn to enjoy massage.

 

I'm pretty much "in recovery" now, but the word "recovery" doesn't really apply, because I've gone places I've never been before.  So what is "recovery?"  I lead a pretty active, engaged life.  I have a regular practice of yoga & karate weekly (I just added weightlifting / circuit training to the mix, too), and while I'm not much into meditating, I try to make my interaction with my body meditative.  I let my body be my guide to what helps and what harms.  My yoga teacher says, "The body is the sat-guru, the ultimate teacher."

 

You say you sometimes take Omega 3.  Please, take it every day.  Up to 6000-8000 IU if you can.  Please read the Omega 3 thread I posted for you for more information.  It's vitally important to healing.

 

Start there, and then start by challenging your senses.  Take a daily walk, like it is a prescription from G-d.  Take it at the same time every day, if you can.  I made my daily walk 10 minutes only - so that I had no excuse.  There is always time for a 10 minute walk.  It's never too cold or too hot for a 10 minute walk.  Now, I have added some tai chi at the end, so it's more like 15 minutes, but I can tell when I miss a day.  

 

Please, we're waiting for your signature - it becomes more and more important the further down the page we go.  If you are using a phone, you may be helped by this post:  Complete your Signature from Phone or Tablet

 

It does get better.  Please use this thread a a journal to track your progress, to list your symptoms and ask questions.  Clicking on "Follow" in the upper right hand corner can train SA to send you an email when someone posts here.

 

I hope you see the sun today!

[SkyBlue]

Dear Keti,

 

Welcome to SA. I am so sorry for your situation. The good news is that people really, really do heal. The more you read people's stories here  the more you will see this is true. Especially the moderators -- they are great resources. 

 

I have such compassion for this beautiful statement, "as if I had never lived in this house." It is a heart wrenching but accurate description of anhedonia and lack of pleasure. The "real you" is in there still -- just covered up by all of this. 

Hugs to you.

[Ketiperri]

help me please! I feel like I 'm crazy ! no memories at all foreign to my room to house all! I became very stupid, I can not do anything! My mind does not work! I can not stand! how long it takes?????

[scallywag]

keti -- I'm sorry you're having such difficulties.  Memory problems are a withdrawal symptom. I wish I could tell you how long this will last. Unfortunately nobody can predict how long withdrawal symptoms will take to go away. 
 
Edited to add:

We need you to create a signature that lists your medication history. When we have that, we might have suggestions about what you can do to lighten your symptoms.
A request: Would you summarize your history in a signature -- drugs, doses, dates, and discontinuations & reinstatements, in the last 12-18 months particularly? Any drugs prior to that can just be listed with start and stop years. Please put your withdrawal history in signature

If you are using a mobile device -- a phone or tablet -- please read the instructions in these 2 posts.
Post number 8;
Post number 9

[Chuck83]

Memory loss is from WD, I take 1.5 years for this pass completely, I have an adverse reaction not WD but many symptoms are really similar.

[Ketiperri]

thank you everyone! I am very, very badly , my brain is not working , I'm confused , no memory at all. I can not stand!!! this hell !!! Why is it that evening, the symptoms decrease ??? and why I am worse every day, even after 1 year ? I do not see the outside world , I can not even look out the window !!! Thank you! How are you?

[Chuck83]

During the WD sometimes the symptoms are less amplified in the evening than the morning.

Before colonoscopy 20 days ago, I recovered of many symptoms that I have and for 2 years i feel very well, now after colonoscopy my  gut are really messed up and I feel really sick.

[Ketiperri]

What is your symptomps, Chuck?

[Chuck83]

I have cramps and spasms in my stomach and intestine after lunch and dinner, and when I sitting for a long time but this is not WD is a effect of colonoscopy 20 days ago. Plus they gave me Buscopan before the exam, and now I have shortness of breath, for 2 days i have allucination and extrapiramidale syptoms, and my bowel regularity is greatly changed.

From the symptoms of WD had recovered almost all in more than two years, the memory was ok, and also the cognitive problems were gone.

The only symptom is remaing from WD is PSSD, but has had some improvements. I have colonoscopy because two gastrointerologists, They have made psychological terrorism to me and my family, saying that a rectal bleeding caused by colitis and hemorrhoids, could be a polyp or a cancer, but my colon by colonoscopy is result perfectly clean.

[Ketiperri]

ohh i m sorry! you were severe or mild cognitive symptoms? You could work under wd ? 1,5 year by the time the symptoms have disappeared ? I have so much I want to be a little better if it 's terrible . . I get lost in your own house. do not understand .

[Chuck83]

My cognitive symptoms is mild to severe for 3 months, after 4 months is start to slow go away. After 6 months to adverse reactions to citalopram,  I had to choose whether to do a PHD in biology, or do test for MD school, and I chose the second, after 1.5 years my cognitive functions is almost to normal, now is for 3 years and only symptoms remaing is PSSD, except for new adverse reaction to colonoscopy procedure and prep.

 

[Ketiperri]

It was a sign that someone's voice crackling and roaring in the head ? This means that the brain dies ? 1year only worsen all symptoms

[Ketiperri]

Help!! After one year, the wd possible is psychotic symptomps?

[scallywag]

Yes, symptoms of any type can arise a year after your last dose.
 
We need you to create a signature that has your medication and withdrawal history.

A request: Would you summarize your history in a signature -- drugs, doses, dates, and discontinuations & reinstatements, in the last 12-18 months particularly? Any drugs prior to that can just be listed with start and stop years.

Please put your withdrawal history in signature

If you are using a phone, please read these two posts for detailed instructions:
Post number 8;

Post number 9

[Chuck83]

Yes Ketiperry is possible to have psycothic symptoms after one year of WD, for some people They may last but then disappear,  however, all the people who took psychiatric drugs sometimes can have the return of psychotic symptoms, the important thing is to manage this crisis.

[Ketiperri]

Help please ! My mind is completely mad , I'm confused , have no memories of my life , I do not recognize our house ! I go crazy ! I see everything black ! what to do??? I can not stand!!!

[scallywag]

The symptoms of withdrawal are uncomfortable and very distressing. It will help you very much if you learn to accept them and learn ways to shift your focus. Please have a look at these topics:

Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

Change the channel - dealing with cognitive symptoms

[Ketiperri]

hi . how are you? I'm very sick. What is the reason that the symptoms are worse from day to day ? my brain is in coma !!! I'll be brain dead ??? Have a nice day!

[scallywag]

We need you to complete a medication and withdrawal history in a signature.

 

Please put your withdrawal history in signature

 

If you are posting using a mobile phone or a tablet, please look at these two posts for instructions:

Post number 8;

Post number 9

[Ketiperri]

This is right.

[scallywag]

Thank you for posting a signature.

 

Have you read these links posted above?

Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms
Change the channel - dealing with cognitive symptoms

[Ketiperri]

Yes, I read.

What do you think about hiperbar oxygen therapy? I will try this next week.

http://www.txhbo.com/learn-more/hbot-for-severe-addition/

[Ketiperri]

Somebody try this???

[scallywag]

I don't think that treatment will make any permanent improvement in your symptoms. The treatment is intended for people who are dealing with alcohol and opiate withdrawal.  Their assumptions about the source of alcohol and opiate withdrawal symptoms seem highly speculative to me.