Alto, thanks. i am honored by your reply. I appreciate YOU and ALL the moderators (Chessie, Scalwag to name a few) for helping me/us when quite literally no one else can. I appreciate y'all and the patience and compassion and wisdom that is shown to each of us. I cannot find enough or the right words to express my gratitude for your time given to literally hurting people you do not know who are so lost, confused in so much chaos in our lives and brains. Again, THANK YOU Y'ALL.
OK, I will hold at 450 mg of Trileptal after my pouring of gasoline on my brain and body by cutting it by 50% in 10 days from 900 mg. I have been fairly stable since Saturday night after suffering the WORST ANXIETY that began on Tuesday since I started my withdrawal descent in August from the 6 drugs supposed to help me sleep including Xanax. This insomnia first started after my c/t of Klonopin in March 2015. I was held together by bandaids of Belsomra and Silenor finally from August 2015 to March 2016 when Latuda knocked them out. It was given for depression followed by more harmful drug exposures quickly from March to July this year. Most recently I was no worse in symptoms after taking my last lithium. So I did not connect the dots for the rapid Trileptal taper and thought it was just another bad wave from Xanax. I was so focused on getting off of. the Trileptal.
Beginning this past August, I was in hell with bad insomnia, anxiety, anxiety breathing, bad head pain, sick like flu, exhaustion, fever, hot and cold, sound & light hypersensitivy and many more from what I believe was mainly XANAX withdrawal. Regardless whatever. It is all so very complicated by all the cocktails I have been on. The insomnia and head pain and anxiety breathing and flu like fever hot and cold are much improved and some even gone so I am healing.
I stayed up late until 2 on Saturday night trying to research Trileptal .... I have spent countless hours trying to figure out how to taper in the last 2 weeks. I should not have stayed up late like your self care says (sleep hygiene) along with so many other good points I am trying to do ... wished I had had these in August. Many I have figured out on my own like no sugar, no caffeine, etc. I again wrongly stayed up past midnight last night BUT WAS NO LONGER FRANTICALLY SEARCHING FOR TRILEPTAL TAPER. i am literally exhausted, but I am CALM, because I have hope and a reasonable realistic plan with the wealth of information given here.
If and when I remain stable, I will resume tapering. However, at that point, I will cut 75 mg which is below the original 10% of 900 mg or 90 mg I should have done. I cannot cut the 300 mg pill below 75 mg without it disentegrating so I cannot get to 45 mg. I do not want to do a water titration - tried that with klonopin. I realize and expect many more waves for a long time. I hate them. I believe my rush was also driven by wanting to avoid going to see pdoc and telling her what I was doing and getting another script. I think I thought I had to survive with the pills I had left. DUH??? Somehow did not even think about how I could maybe get the pharmacy or me to telephone a refill request as she would not honor so I would run out. Was not able to even rationally think I could go see her and get the script without telling her what I was doing. DOUBLE DUH. I have or used to have a good brain, high IQ but it is not really functioning well.
i would not have been able to put the brakes on my crazy rapid taper without the help and knowledge given here. With the help from y'all, my boat is righted, and I am holding and have a more realistic taper plan. Thank you. Now you can move on to help someone else who is in far worse shape than me.
May God Bless each of you, and I am so very thankful for SA. It is a phenomenal site.
I was so focused on getting off of.
THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD = NOW only on TRILEPTAL 450mg began w/900mg 7/16 -- off LITHIUM 600mg (sometimes 300mg 5/15 -11/16 took 2 months to taper) .... XANAX 2 mg for 2 weeks but addicted in 6/16 tapered 7/16-9/16 JUMPED 9/30 (believe have kindling from previous benzos)
6 meds nightly for INSOMNIA includes XANAX .. BELSOMRA 20mg c/t 8/20/16 off & on for a yr ZANAFLEX 8 mg /SILENOR 6mg/PROZASIN 15 mg/DOXEPIN 50 mg on all nightly 2 months 6/16 - 7/16 except for silenor (year) wd ALL 8/16-9/16 w/pdoc help
c/t KLONOPIN .5mg which began INSOMNIA end of 3/15 after on for 4 months also horrible sound& light sensitivity sometimes took 2 or 3 reinstated & then c/t@hospital 5/15 on TEMPAZEPAM/SEROQUEL/LITHIUM when left hospital tolerance to temazepam after 1 month given ATIVAN in hospital& later
SEROQUEL started @ 200 mg and overnight to 800 mg had horrible akathasisia & rash DEPAKOTE 1000 mg off after few wks ALL I COULD ENDURE
then AMBIEN side effects & tolerance on for few months 5/15 - 8/15 and then again 2 mos 5/16 LATUDA 3/16 on days BAD/GEODON 4/16 on less 2 weeks BAD AKATHASIA/ZYPREXA bad mouth shaking almost 24/7 off & on few months in 2015 & again in 2016
trazodon/remeron/gabapentin/sonata/lunesta did nothing to help INSOMNIA so got off after few days - also short time SAPHRIS BAD
MEDICATION SENSITIVE & have paradoxical side effects -- CANNOT TAKE BENZOS, ATYPICAL-ANTIPSYCHOTICS, ANTI-DEPRESSANTS
PAST prior to 2 yrs on Prozac even1/4 pill caused BAD ANXIETY, CELEXA OK, Abilify, Pristiq, Lamictal, Paxil BAD - more but can't remember