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ProzacWasCreatedBySatan1: Prozac Journey: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly


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#1 ProzacWasCreatedBySatan1

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Posted 16 December 2016 - 12:53 AM

Hello everyone,

 

I spend nearly every day on this forum so I figure why not make a post of my own. Well where to start??? 9 months ago I was a hard headed, intense, body building, drug abusing party animal. I had just graduated college, and immediately became an assistant manager. The job was perfect for me, being sales minded and very outgoing. Then one day, mid March everything in my life came spiraling out of control. I drank heavily at a party and experimented with some cocaine. I woke up the next morning feeling off, eeew withdrawals, I told myself I would make it through this week and it would get better. It didn't... I was having panic attacks at work, so I went to an urgent care clinic. He tossed me a prescription to Prozac and sent me on my way.

 

A huge sigh of relief came over me.... What I didn'the know is that cocaine withdrawl was nothing. I was about to be put through the most brutal hell I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. I took the Prozac for about 3 months without a Pdoc, diagnosing myself online and hearing about "startup effects" I persevered through this lobotomy, surprisingly sober (despite my best efforts).

 

Until one day I went on vacation with my family and I Snapped, I drank a few beers and went completely manic...started throwing plates in this beach house my brother rented and hid from my brothers because I didn'the want them too see me. At this time i'd been seeing a doctor for a week and she said it was fine to cold turkey Prozac. So I did, and ever since I have been slowly crawling out of hell. Withdrawl and being on the drug feel no different to me, extreme depersonalization, which is mostly gone, sensitivity to everything, food, vitamins, etc. Short term memory loss, and the list goes on.

 

2 months in my doctor put me on Lamictal, but due to my extreme sensitivity I started to feel crazy again, so I got off. Felt good for a week then things spiraled out of control again. I finally convinced her to give me 5 MG tabs that I break in to quarters because that'she all my nervous system can handle. She thinks it's a placebo, but I was insistent that she give me the micro dose. It helps tremendously with my depersonalization. But this is a success story, so i'll get to the positive.

 

I learned that 1 year ago I was "happy" but my life was way off balanced. I was addicted to drugs and would anything to impress others, and I hated the person I saw in the mirrior. For once in my life I was thrown a curveball where I was forced to work on myself, and luckily through all of these terrible events I have achieved a level of balance in my life.

 

I still have a lot of residual side effects of treating my brain like a piñata for the last 5 years. I still occasionally drink, if I feel like I can handle it but I usually cap out at 2-3 beers. I have a psych doctor that will literally throw any potent benzo I want at me (which I refuse to even pick up my perscription). I am far from perfect, but i'm learning, and feeling myself recovering.

 

I have an amazing support system consisting of my girlfriend, my family and a friend that literally went through the exact same experience as me. For all of those who think you will be stuck like this forever, you will recover. If someone like me, with no self control can make it through this, you can too. I now get why heroin addicts never get off of it, because they just want to feel "normal" again. Your drug dealer just does it by the books.

 

We can only take life one day at a time, spread positivity and try to do a little good in every day. And don'the beat up on yourself for your mistakes. Thank you Altostrata and everyone on this forum. You have all helped me grow in to an individual I am liking more and more every day. I will be sure to give updates in future months.


Edited by ChessieCat, 16 December 2016 - 01:01 AM.
Removed name where employed/added spacing between paragraphs


#2 Fox

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Posted 16 December 2016 - 07:44 PM

So glad you are doing so well! Can you give details as far as when your symptoms improved?

Prozac 10 mg 03-15 to 10-15.

Prozac 20 mg 10-15 to 12-15.

Taper prozac 01-16 to 03-16.

Last Prozac 03-14-16.

 


#3 ProzacWasCreatedBySatan1

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Posted 17 December 2016 - 10:04 PM

After 2 months the food sensitivities decreased a lot. When I started the Lamictal, I started experiencing all of my symptoms again because the dosage was far too high. And it took another month to get back to where it was before. My short term memory is getting better, especially in the last 2 weeks. I find myself saying, "oh yeah, that's how I used to do that" a lot more now. I still feel like my cognitive function is somewhat impaired, but when I start to feel a panic attack coming on. I am able to snap myself out of it before I go back in to the hole. That has been a major step for me. Not worrying about slipping in to depersonalization :)

#4 Fox

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Posted 18 December 2016 - 01:22 PM

That is wonderful!

Prozac 10 mg 03-15 to 10-15.

Prozac 20 mg 10-15 to 12-15.

Taper prozac 01-16 to 03-16.

Last Prozac 03-14-16.

 


#5 ProzacWasCreatedBySatan1

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Posted 12 February 2017 - 05:24 PM

I am on month 9 after cold turkey quitting prozac. My panic attacks have lessened to a state of general anxiety, I no longer struggle with depersonalization but will still get waves of derealization from time to time. The improvements i've made in the last 2 months have been significant, so I should be greatful and patient about my current circumstances. But spending a year in a dream like state has made me grow very impatient. My current symptoms are very a rattling noise in my head when I attempt to talk to others, and a very impaired short term memory. Both of these make it very difficult to do my job, and relate to others. I really believe these will subside eventually, but I need some encouragement, i've always been a very outgoing person, so it kills me to know that most of my conversations have no substance, and i'll forget what I am talking about mid sentence. I am under a lot of pressure at work to succeed, and my boss is not understanding at all. Does anyone have any suggestions how to improve short term memory? Or a success story about how your memory has improved? Thank you for any input, I wish you all a speedy recovery. We can make it through this!

#6 anongrl5590

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Posted 12 February 2017 - 11:27 PM

That's awesome! I totally agree with your username btw  ;) ). Do you ever get physical symptoms or are they mainly mental ones? Are you going through the windows and waves phases too? Are you still taking the Lamictal?

 

I have short term memory as well (even before Prozac) so I too would like to know how to improve on that! 


My medication -- Prozac
August 2015: Started on 10mg/day
September 2015 to May 2016: Increased to 20mg/day
May 2016: Abruptly stopped 20mg for 2 weeks (withdrawal symtoms arose but assumed it was worsened depression)
June 2016 to August 2016: increased to 40mg (my body reacted very badly to this dose)
August 2016: decreased back to 20mg
September 2016: tapered off 10mg this month alone
September 30, 2016: last day of Prozac
October 2016: month long window
November 2016-Present: WD symptoms (too many physical sxs and some mental sxs)
February 5-20, 2017: Reinstated at 1-2mg // February 21, 2017: Back to no meds

 


#7 ProzacWasCreatedBySatan1

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Posted 12 February 2017 - 11:40 PM

I decided to stop lamictal, without the supervision of a doctor that actually knew how to micro dose, I didn't feel safe doing it by myself. After I stoppedon't, after 4-5 days of withdrawl off the Lamictal I saw a lot of improvement in short term memory. I still have a lot of issues with short term memory, but not as severe as before. I have really made some major breakthroughs lately, I don't have constant panic attacks and generally I am living a normal life. (I still have issues with short term memory) I literally wrote that again so I decided to leave it lol, and I also constantly have to burp. Also minor but tolerable food sensitivities. I feel pretty confident that I will be 100% in the next year! So things are on the up and up!

#8 Altostrata

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Posted 13 February 2017 - 12:36 AM

Hello, PWCBS.

 

How long were you taking Lamictal? Did you take 1.25mg throughout that time? What was its effect?

 

You've probably seen our suggestions for fish oil and magnesium supplements

 

Magnesium, nature's calcium channel blocker

 

King of supplements: Omega-3 fatty acids (fish oil)

 

Try a little bit, one at a time, and see how it affects you. Many people find these helpful.

 


This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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#9 ProzacWasCreatedBySatan1

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Posted 13 February 2017 - 10:18 AM

I was taking around 1 MG, my doctor was willing to give me 5 MG tabs and I would lick one every morning. She didn't let me take it to a compound pharmacy so I ended up quitting. 1 MG made my mind short term memory somewhat fogger. When I would bump up to anywhere between 2-5 mg, I would get very bad headaches. I feel I would have had better results with lamictal if I could get it compound ed, but I was basically firing from the hip. My vitamin sensitivity has significantly decreased, so I am able to take a multi vitamin/mineral supplement with glutathione support, adrenal support, and a digestion aid all prescribed by a doctor in functional medicine. I also take fish oil and a magnesium supplement as well.

https://www.google.c...3c1YxGPP4RMG1M:

http://bioclinicnatu...mineral-formula

https://www.google.c...oF01jLbS3hv8GM:

#10 O2bhappy

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Posted 14 February 2017 - 07:46 AM

ProzacWasCreatedBySatan1 -

 

I just wanted to say that is the best screen name.  It is so true.  I am 17 months off Prozac and my w/d has been awful.  I had times that I thought I was going to die and I had times that I would wish I would die because I felt so bad.  I know that is awful to say but it was true. 

 

I am glad that you have been able to snap yourself out of a panic attack. What tricks have you used to help snap yourself out of the panic?  I was put on Prozac because of having panic attacks. 


Discontinued Fluoxetine cold turkey after taking it for 12 years. Stopped taking Fluoxetine in August 2015.

My current withdrawal symptoms: Constant anger, burning sensation in my head/brain, internal shaking, crying, smell hallucination, hot flashes, night sweats, insomnia, anxiety, depression, and scared feelings.

Synthroid for hypothyroidism.


#11 Altostrata

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 12:55 AM

I finally convinced her to give me 5 MG tabs that I break in to quarters because that'she all my nervous system can handle. She thinks it's a placebo, but I was insistent that she give me the micro dose. It helps tremendously with my depersonalization. But this is a success story, so i'll get to the positive.

 

 

^This sounded like you had some benefit from the lamotrigine?

 

What is your supplement regimen? 

 

Can you describe the rattling in your head in more detail?

 

Have patience, your memory will come back. A stress reduction course might be helpful.


This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

#12 ProzacWasCreatedBySatan1

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 09:15 PM

Yeah I do think I benefited from what from the lamotrigine. It definitely inhibited the fight or flight response I would get to most stimuli, but it increased my forgetfulness at work. Especially at high doses (when I took larger bites of the 5mg tab). The inability to measure how much I was taking was a large portion of the reason I quit taking it. My vitamin sensitivity has significantly decreased, so I am able to take a multi vitamin/mineral supplement with glutathione support, adrenal support, and a digestion aid all prescribed by a doctor in functional medicine. In addition I take take fish oil, coq 10 and a magnesium supplement.

https://www.google.c...3c1YxGPP4RMG1M:

http://bioclinicnatu...mineral-formula

https://www.google.c...oF01jLbS3hv8GM:

The rattling in my head is almost a buzzing noise/ vibration that seems to come from the center of my head when rather than something you can actually hear through your ears. It has also lessened a lot in severity. According to most websites it is an anxiety symptom and has relation to your fight or flight response, so it makes sense why I'd be experiencing it.

I agree a stress reduction courses could definitely benefit me. Do you have any suggestions?

#13 Altostrata

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 09:43 PM

I don't think the buzzing is an anxiety symptom, I think it is either tinnitus or another withdrawal symptom, related to brain zaps. Good to hear it has reduced. Is it worse at any particular time of day?

 

What is your supplement schedule, when do you take each supplement, what is the dosage?

 

How much fish oil are you taking?

 

Re stress reduction: See if a medical center near you has courses, or Google to find videos on the Web.


This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

#14 ProzacWasCreatedBySatan1

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 10:25 PM

I definitely think it'should a withdrawl related symptom. The article below says it's related to the brain being in a hyperstimulated state.

http://www.anxietyce...your-head.shtml

Hyperstimulation can cause the electrical activity in the brain to increase. This increased electrical activity can cause neurons to act erratically, which can cause all sorts of abnormal and unusual nervous system behavior, such as causing this symptom – a humming, droning, rumbling, throbbing, vibrating-like, hissing, fizzing, or other types of sounds in your head. Since the brain receives and interprets auditory information, it can also interpret heightened and erratic neuronal activity as a ‘sound.’ This symptom is an example of that.

Fish oil 2000mg in the morning and 2000mg at night. I take 2 multivitamin tablets in the morning and at night. I take two adrenal support tablets, and 100mg coq10 every morning and 2 bio gest caps before meals.