Jump to content
SurvivingAntidepressants.org is temporarily closed to new registrations until 1 April ×

Waiting12: needing advice


Waiting12

Recommended Posts

Some encouraging news, this person was on medication for ~8 years and only started feeling better 2-2.5 years in... it's going to be a long road.

Maybe we can get to where he is one day...

 

All the best,

Ethan

~2008: Started escitalopram (Cipralex) 10mg

~2012: Tried stopping for 3 months, eventually relapsed.

~2013-2014: escitalopram (Cipralex) 20mg, Ritalin 10mg

~2015: escitalopram (Cipralex) 10mg only

~2017: Was dosing 5-10 mg, then stopped completely cold-turkey in May 2017.

 

Overall, a ~9-year course of escitalopram (Cipralex/Lexapro).

Link to comment
3 hours ago, PoetJester said:

Hi Waiting

 

i had noticed in your symptoms post about tetris affect that you had mentioned that your hypnagogia went away.  i still suffer from it horribly 4 years after stopping zoloft and zyprexa.   Did it just go away on it's own  or did you do something for it?

 

poetjester

 

I didnt do anything for it, just waited it out & it went on it’s own. Im just waiting everything out really. I’m so sorry you’re still dealing with it. It was scary! Hang in there. 

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment
On 12/4/2017 at 6:12 PM, bheb said:

My timeline is somewhat similar to yours. I figured out what was wrong with me at the very end of 2016, and 2017 has been the biggest challenge to date. I hope next year is a turning point for us both. I'm glad you're able to cross off all those symptoms, and hopefully your most distressing ones will be crossed out next time. 

 

On 12/4/2017 at 10:42 PM, RachelSusan said:

Hi Waiting12,

I have had many of the same symptoms you have listed.  I too hope that 2018 is a better year for you. 

Rachel

 Thanks for the support guys!!

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment

Hey Ethan. Thanks for stopping by. We do have a lot in common. Do you mostly suffer from anhedonia and cognitive stuff ? No crazy chemical anxiety?

 

You can you pm me any time. We’ve made it this far. It’s only a matter of time. You will be ‘you’ again.

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment
  • 2 weeks later...

Hi Waiting 12

I am very glad that you are the example that hypnagogia will go away on its own.

Please tell me what is your eating pattern.Any supplements are you taking?There is something you did unknowingly that caused your hypnagogia went away.

Please reply.

Cold turkeyed risperidone (1m.g)and trihexyphenidyl combination drug out of ignorance,In August 2016 after one month use.

Withdrawal symptoms settled at dreamful,disturbing sleep.

Thus introduced to olanzapine for sleep.Started using olanzapine out of ignorance.

Tapering olanzapine 10 m.g from February 2017.

May 2018 :Still suffering dreams,Still tapering olanzapine at 0.625.100ml water+2.5 mg olanzapine. June 2018 22.5ml=0.57mg.July 2018 20ml,August 2018-17.5ml,September 2018-15ml,October 2018 10 ml,December 2018 7 ml, BrassMonkey slide method so far at lower doses.2 nd December cold turkeyed , only to reach minure doses as reinstatement to cutshort endless tapering process.4rth December started 1ml.

Almost no symptoms and sleep is better,So started 0.5 ml from 17-12-2018.

"0"from31-12-18.Re birth happened from 10- 2020,as rejuvenation took whole2019.Completely recovered now.

Link to comment
On 12/28/2017 at 4:03 AM, rupa said:

Hi Waiting 12

I am very glad that you are the example that hypnagogia will go away on its own.

Please tell me what is your eating pattern.Any supplements are you taking?There is something you did unknowingly that caused your hypnagogia went away.

Please reply.

 

Just time. I haven’t taken supplements or anything like that. I’ve just been waiting it out, getting through time and trying to let the symptoms run their course. 

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment
  • 3 weeks later...

I recently emailed with Don Killian. I told my story and asked a few questions. He’s a very nice guy and has been healed for 3 years or so. His website merryjoyousfree has a lot of success stories and good information. He does videos about every other day. This is his response video to me if anyone is interested. 

 

 

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment

His story is here.

 

https://youtu.be/Mv9HcGVkEUM

 

He had alcohol withdrawal, adverse reactions to ADs, and Benzo Withdrawal. He said it took around 22 months to feel well again once off everything.

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment
13 hours ago, Lindsay625 said:

Thank you!! 

 

You’re welcome, hope you are beginning to feel better!

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment

Hello

In June 2014 I was taking Celexa for 2 days, 25 mg zoloft 8 weeks, 10 mg Paxil 3 months and 10 mg Lexapro 1 month tapered off in 2 wks.. Was on a total of 6 months had side effects to them all. Went off and had my first panic attack a month later in January 2015. In March 2015 was having stomach issues and was put on Xanax for a week Dr. Said it was anxiety. End of that week woke up heart racing so was put back on Lexapro 5 MG and the next night is when my sleep got messed up. Literally not sleeping

Was it the Xanax or lexapro?? Went off sleep on and off and taking Xanax on and off. The end of April 2015 tried Buspar for 2 days and had side effects and could not sleep at all. Middle of May 2015 went on Ambien and lexapro again. Inner vibration started. Switched to paxil. Went off Ambien in June 2015 and off Paxil July 2015. October 2015 got worse went of zoloft 12.5 mg through December 2015. I was tolerating what I was going through January and February 2016. Then March got worse with horrible panic. Tried hypnotherapy in May 2016 a couple times couldn't Relax when she started counting backwards it freaked me out. Started not sleeping again in May. Went back on Xanax for 2 months May-July 2016. Tried liquid Prozac 5 mg then 10 mg side effects July - August then switched Zoloft 12.5 mg August - September 2016. Been off antidepressants since September 5, 2016. Been off Xanax since July 28, 2016, but I have taken it 8 other times since then through May 2017. Have symptoms going on with agoraphobia. Is this withdrawal??

May 2017 feeling horrible and more intense symptoms.

Link to comment

That was awesome W12 . I love Don Killian . I did not realize you have Akathisia . We should talk more .

December 2014 - Lexapro 20 mg

August 2016 Med free (6 week taper)

December 22 2021  added Abilify 5mg / Ativan .5mg / Depakote ER 1000mg

Discontinued Abilify 5mg on 12-30-21---accidental dose on 1-13-22 (looks like Ativan)

Ativan PRN/Discontinued 1-14-22

Only drug is Depakote ER 1000mg ( looking to taper slow and safe for once )

3/24/22 Depakote 625mg 

Propranolol 20-40mg  PRN

Link to comment

Hi waiting ,I watched the video ,very good questions and very informative ,its left me with loads of questions about my own withdrawl/tapering .

good on ye being pharma free ,I realise that's not much help to ye being in withdrawl  .ive kept holding my taper and hoping to stabilise but I believe in my case I need to get off the drug and suffer while I taper at least .

Thanks for the video .

Take care . 

Alcohol free since February 2015 

1MG diazepam

4.5MG PROZAC.

 

 

 

Link to comment
  • 1 month later...

I have a question for the ladies out there.

 

So far this month my cycle is 6-9 days late with no signs of happening soon. I took a couple tests and I’m not pregnant and its pretty much an impossibility. There are a few things I changed in the last 4-6 weeks. I know I’m sensitive in withdrawal but could any of these changes really delay or miss a cycle?

 

The first thing was I took an aspirin for a migraine a few weeks ago. It was the first time I’ve taken any medicine in over a year. I also reactly badly to it which even surprised me, but thankfully the reaction only lasted about 15 hours. I only mention this because the only other time in my life my cycle was late was the last time I took a med. A little over year ago I was 2 weeks late after being on antibiotics for 20 days.

 

The second thing I have changed is I’ve cut out most meat from my diet about 6 weeks ago. I have still been eating seafood, fish and some red meat on occasion when a vegetarian/pescatarian option isn’t available.

 

The last thing is the last 3-4 weeks I have been going to the gym 3-5 days a week for about 60-90 minutes. After being mostly couch-bound for around 20 months I’m sure this is a shock to my body. I can’t workout like I used to but I’m working on my strength and cardio. I’m not training like an Olympian or anything so not sure if this is the cause.

 

Also, can just plain withdrawal cause this issue?

 

This bothers me a lot because my wd symptoms are worse before and during my cycle and I’ve been stuck for a couple weeks now. 

 

Anyone have any thoughts on this?

Thanks

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Here is a topic to check out:

 

pms-and-menstrual-cycle-issues-during-withdrawal

 

 

* NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA *

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:  (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq  on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

Link to comment
  • 3 weeks later...

Thanks Chessie, that was helpful.

 

I’m heading into week 4 of an awful setback from exercise. I’m 15 months off and feel like I’ve went backwards many months. Old symptoms that were gone have returned and others are more intense. (Also, just to add to my previous question, my cycle has come and gone although it was 2 weeks late from hitting the gym, so I’m assuming hormones are also at play here.)

 

Has anyone else had an exercise induced setback? Does it end and go back to how I was before or is this my new baseline after stressing out my CNS? I was about ready to get a part time job and start to get on with life and now I’ve felt nearly as bad as last summer. I am surprised at how intense this is this far out as I thought I’d be almost over this by now. 

 

I feel like I’ll be sick forever. Words of encouragement are welcome.

 

 

 

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment

Hey waiting I'm sorry to hear that. Oddly enough I actually upped my exercise today too and have noticed old symptoms coming back right after. 

 

This has has happened to me before. Usually not a huge setback but sometimes a few weeks long. I've always returned to the previous baseline  and I'm sure you will too.

Aug-Dec 2015 Prozac 20mg / Dec 2015-Feb 2016 Prozac 15mg / Feb 2016-May2016 Prozac 20mg

May 2016-June 2016 15mg

June 2016-August 2016 10mg

October 2016-January 2017 15mg, alternating agitation/akathisia sets in --> cold turkey

January 2017 Clonazepam .5mg 

February 2017 Clonazepam 1mg (for a week) then .5mg morning and .25mg evening for about a month. Came down to .25mg morning and evening. 

May 1, 2017 Clonazepam .25mg morning and .125mg evening. // May 20, 2017 Clonazepam .25mg morning and .0625 evening (.3125 total).

early June .28125 // early mid june .25mg // mid june .21875 // late june .1875 // early july .15625 // early mid july .125 

mid july .09375mg // late july .0625 //early August 2017 down to .03125mg once a day, hopped off in mid August

reinstated at .0625mg late August // Oct 16 - updose to .07mg and switch to oral Rosemont solution

Nov 17 2017 reinstate Prozac .5mg // Nov 21 2017 prozac 1.6mg // Dec 18 2017  3mg prozac / fast taper off the reinstatement -- probably completely off early Oct 2018

June 2019 begin tapering off .07mg Clonazepam, Finish taper December 2019

Link to comment
On 3/31/2018 at 3:51 PM, bheb said:

Hey waiting I'm sorry to hear that. Oddly enough I actually upped my exercise today too and have noticed old symptoms coming back right after. 

 

This has has happened to me before. Usually not a huge setback but sometimes a few weeks long. I've always returned to the previous baseline  and I'm sure you will too.

 

Have you been able to exercise this whole time? I wasn’t able to until I forced myself to start recently and apparently I went too hard, too fast. I didn’t feel bad until 2-3 weeks in, so it wasn’t right after a session for me. I’m glad you always returned to your previous baseline! Thank you for sharing.

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment

[I posted this in the symptoms & selfcare vision section but also wanted to leave it here in case someone with this same symptom comes along.]

 

Does anyone have (or know of anyone who has recovered that had) jumpy vision? I’ve had it for a terribly long time without any breaks and I’m getting scared. I would really love to hear from someone that this does, in fact, get better and go away. Or even that it’s normal for wd. It’s the only symptom I haven’t gotten a window from. It’s also one of my original CT symptoms from 2015, so I’ve had it before my severe adverse reactions symptoms came on. It got worse then though.

 

It’s not quite a nystagmus since it’s not visible to others. It’s not quite oscillopsia since it’s worse when sitting still and not when in motion. Oscillopsia is the closest thing I’ve heard to describe what my eyes do, though. Also, this post from a user on Benzo Buddies describes it well. “”So my vision doesn't seem to bounce when I jog or walk or drive, it just has a mild tremor like the world is shaking constantly, and I notice it more when I sit still. And on top of that, when I try and focus my eyes on something in the distance, it's like it bobbles around the object not able to sit still. “”

 

When I try to focus or stare at a stationary object/person my eyes ‘jump’ or ‘twitch’ to the right about every second and I have to refocus them back to the left. It is worse for things in the distance and not as bad when things are up close. It’s like my vision is moving a fixed amount each time so an upclose jump isn’t as bothersome as a jump from trying to see something across a large room, nevermind long distances outside which just makes me feel sick and hopelessly frustrated when I try. I hope this makes sense. It’s very hard to describe. 

 

Is this related to the ‘boaty’ vision some describe?

 

I feel like I can’t really ‘take in’ things like nature/people because of this. I feel like it is also contributing to the disconnected feelings and poor memory. Also, dizziness, pressure and nausea. I’ve had loads of other vision stuff that have came and gone and came back again. I just really need some reassurance about this ‘jumpy/unable to focus on a single spot’ vision.

 

Can any one else relate? This isn’t a symptom I’ve heard many people complain of which is frightening.

 

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment

Hey Waiting, I just joined orange theory fitness. I’ve been doing it almost two weeks but I feel like it’s been helping me a lot. Do you think it’ll end up back firing? I usually feel great after because I forget about all of this on the days I do it, and not to mention I have NO trouble falling asleep at night afterwards and sleeping in! But if it’s going to end up making me worse that scares me 

October 30th, 2017 one dose of 50 mg sertraline at night before bed. 

 

 

Link to comment

Just read through your thread. I’m 24 too and had been out of college for a year when I tried to come off of my antidepressant (Effexor) and had to quit my job as a nurse. How have you been doing?

6 years old- 23 years old Effexor XR 75-150mg 

March-May 2017  3-month taper of Effexor XR from 150mg down to 37.5 and then 0.  

After a week reinstated Effexor at 37.5 and quickly worked your way up to 150.

Mid-May increased to 187.5.

End of July to mid-October switched to 50-200mg Zoloft

Nov. to present  switched back to Effexor 75 mg

March 29, 2018 Increased Effexor dose to 150mg (original dose). 

May 12, 2018 Began a 10% AT LEAST monthly taper off of 150mg Effexor XR.

Link to comment
  • 3 weeks later...
On 4/3/2018 at 9:22 AM, Lindsay625 said:

Hey Waiting, I just joined orange theory fitness. I’ve been doing it almost two weeks but I feel like it’s been helping me a lot. Do you think it’ll end up back firing? I usually feel great after because I forget about all of this on the days I do it, and not to mention I have NO trouble falling asleep at night afterwards and sleeping in! But if it’s going to end up making me worse that scares me 

 

Hey Lindsay, I’m glad it’s helping you. Just be sure to listen to your body and adjust accordingly. 

 

On 4/7/2018 at 4:51 PM, wildchild93 said:

Just read through your thread. I’m 24 too and had been out of college for a year when I tried to come off of my antidepressant (Effexor) and had to quit my job as a nurse. How have you been doing?

 

Hi WC, I’m 26 now & still symptomatic at 16 months off. I’m still slowly improving over time. I’m sorry you had to quit your nursing job. I’m still too ill to resume working as well, which bothers me every single day. It’s so awful to be this young and sick for what seems like forever. 

 

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment

Hello Waiting

 

I have followed your thread for a while, I am 22 months out from c.t.  I read your post about the vision problems, I experienced the wavy wobbly vision just the other day and it scared the c**p out of me and then realized that I have had this happen a few times whilst being a passenger in the car. I had to refocus my eyes so hard to stop it and to reassure myself that my sight wasnt failing.

 

I googled the name of what your found and scared myself even more!

 

Lets hope this will go away in time, the brain, nervous system is certainly in chaos and I could easily be at my doctors all the time worrying and stressing.

 

If you have any checkups about it let me know and I will do the same.

Wishing you all the best of healing.

 

Waves

 

Quote

 

 

Various antipressants from 1991 to 2016, Sertraline and many switches over the years.

Last AD's taken:

Citalopram for two weeks only May 2016  to June 2016, last AD taken and CT'd.

2012 to May 2016 Duloxitine 60mg. Doctor switched to Citalopram 20mg May 2016.

Link to comment
  • 3 weeks later...
On 4/3/2018 at 12:31 AM, Waiting12 said:

[I posted this in the symptoms & selfcare vision section but also wanted to leave it here in case someone with this same symptom comes along.]

 

Does anyone have (or know of anyone who has recovered that had) jumpy vision? I’ve had it for a terribly long time without any breaks and I’m getting scared. I would really love to hear from someone that this does, in fact, get better and go away. Or even that it’s normal for wd. It’s the only symptom I haven’t gotten a window from. It’s also one of my original CT symptoms from 2015, so I’ve had it before my severe adverse reactions symptoms came on. It got worse then though.

 

It’s not quite a nystagmus since it’s not visible to others. It’s not quite oscillopsia since it’s worse when sitting still and not when in motion. Oscillopsia is the closest thing I’ve heard to describe what my eyes do, though. Also, this post from a user on Benzo Buddies describes it well. “”So my vision doesn't seem to bounce when I jog or walk or drive, it just has a mild tremor like the world is shaking constantly, and I notice it more when I sit still. And on top of that, when I try and focus my eyes on something in the distance, it's like it bobbles around the object not able to sit still. “”

 

When I try to focus or stare at a stationary object/person my eyes ‘jump’ or ‘twitch’ to the right about every second and I have to refocus them back to the left. It is worse for things in the distance and not as bad when things are up close. It’s like my vision is moving a fixed amount each time so an upclose jump isn’t as bothersome as a jump from trying to see something across a large room, nevermind long distances outside which just makes me feel sick and hopelessly frustrated when I try. I hope this makes sense. It’s very hard to describe. 

 

Is this related to the ‘boaty’ vision some describe?

 

I feel like I can’t really ‘take in’ things like nature/people because of this. I feel like it is also contributing to the disconnected feelings and poor memory. Also, dizziness, pressure and nausea. I’ve had loads of other vision stuff that have came and gone and came back again. I just really need some reassurance about this ‘jumpy/unable to focus on a single spot’ vision.

 

Can any one else relate? This isn’t a symptom I’ve heard many people complain of which is frightening.

 

 

I also had this for a while, and it did get better. My eyes would jump or twitch all the time and it drove me crazy. I had trouble focusing on objects and people close to me and I would have to look away because it would start to make me dizzy. So when talking with people, eye contact was pretty difficult. For objects/people further away, I had to squint and strain my eyes to focus on it/them. Also, if I was talking with someone and the background was busy looking, it would make my eyes start jumping and make me dizzy. I went to the eye doctor and got some glasses to wear while I'm at the computer since that also messed with my eyes. All of these things are a lot better now and rarely even notice any issues. I could actually work without my glasses now, but I figured I might as well wear them to preserve my eye sight once I get older :)

 

I've also started going to the gym and exercising this past year and at first, I noticed symptoms that were gone would re-appear. It was aggravating at first, but after a couple of months they started to go away. I was working out for 3 days a week but just recently started going 5 days a week. I noticed my body was a lot more fatigued and I'm getting more headaches than usual. I believe it's just my body adjusting once again and have full faith that these things will go away after a few weeks as well. 

 

I read your original post and all of your symptoms sound identical to mine when I was experiencing the worst of my WD's. It looks and sounds like you're doing better now, hopefully! I know reading successful stories of healing helps others through all of this...so thank you :)

Started Lexapro (escitalopram) 10mg in 2009 for general depression/mild anxiety.

Stopped taking Lexapro in August of 2013 cold turkey.

Started having vertigo/dizziness in late January of 2014. Symptoms became worse over a few months. 

Re-instated Lexapro 10mg in June of 2014. Could only handle for a week before dropping down to 5mg.

Stopped taking Lexapro in March of 2015 and began taking Celexa 10mg.

 

Also taking topamax 25mg for headaches/migraines and losartan 25mg for high blood pressure.

 

Link to comment
  • 1 month later...
On 4/25/2018 at 7:20 AM, waves12 said:

If you have any checkups about it let me know and I will do the same.

Wishing you all the best of healing.

 Of course. Thanks for stopping by Waves. Sending healing your way as well!

 

On 5/10/2018 at 10:12 AM, Sean said:

I also had this for a while, and it did get better.

Thank you for the reassurance! How long did it take for you? Our stories are similar. I ct'd as well and started getting the nasty physical symptoms which was also dx as vertigo over a year later just as you did. Then couldn't tolerate the drug again. It is so strange how that can happen.

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment

18 month update:

I'm in a 'wave' at the moment so I hope that doesn't negatively affect this update too much. I am still slowly & surely heading in the right direction and I'm so much better than I was even 6 months ago, not to mention over a year ago. That being said I am still dealing with quite a lot still. I feel like I'm in an awkward stage of the recovery process. I am starting to do more & socialize, but still not well enough to go back to work yet which really makes me feel like a loser.

 

Basically, my waves/worse days revolve around my hormones which ends up being about half of the month. Older symptoms come back and the daily symptoms I still do have will intensify. On my better days, my main symptoms are less intense and I am able to ignore them for awhile if I stay busy enough. I will still feel like crap, but its a much easier level of crap to deal with. I still don't have 100% windows yet. I am still avoiding OTC meds & alcohol. I had a strong reaction to a baby aspirin a few months back which I didn't even know was possible to be honest.

 

The only symptom I haven't gotten a break from is the twitchy, jumpy vision. It does vary in intensities which is probably a good sign. Akathisia & the chemical anxiety also weirds me out since it has been so long, but I have some days without it now. Most of the time it is a lot less intense. I still have certain times of the day & month where it can ramp up to an awful level.

 

 

 

My main core symptoms:

*Chemical Anxiety

*Mental & Physical Akathisia/Restlessness- comes & goes; varying intensities
*Screwed up energy levels between akathisia and fatigue

*Anhedonia- No strong positive emotions, personality, sense of humor or ability to have fun

*Dizziness/Balance Issues/Vertigo
*Head pressure

*Blurry vision, sparkles, floaters, wavy patches, dimmed vision
*Nystagmus/jumpy/twitchy vision
*Cognitive issues- Feeling brain damaged, word recall issues, memory problems, brain fog, can't think clearly

*Hormones/pms worsening withdrawal symptoms

*Insomnia- still trouble falling asleep, but usually sleep a regular amount of time
*No Appetite- becoming rare

*Intrusive Thoughts- becoming rare

*Motion sick feelings becoming rare

*Racing Thoughts- rare

 

 

Other symptoms: (all coming and going with various intensities)

*Muscle tension, clenching, twitching & tremors

*Migraines, headaches & neck aches with nausea
*DP/DR
*Sensitivity to chemicals, stress, negativity, violent TV, excessive sunlight and stimulation

*Phobias
*Anticipatory anxiety
*Inability to relax

*Exaggerated Startle reflex/Adrenaline rushes

*Difficulty Making Decisions
*Loss of interests, motivation & confidence

*GI Issues, stabbing intestinal pain, gnawing stomach pains, bloating

*Heavy & painful feeling organs

*Flu-like Feelings & Body Aches
*Extremities feeling numb

*Restless legs
*No Libido
*Tinnitus

*No ear wax

*Cystic Acne on Face, Neck and Back

*Dandruff

*Poor circulation/Raynaud's & constant sweating from feet- during winter/cold weather

*Sciatica pain

*Intrusive Memories

*Inner vibrations- rare

*Ruminating/Obsessive Thoughts- rare

*Random Crying Spells- rare

*Burning Skin- rare

*Flashing lights when falling asleep- rare

*Itchy welts after bathing- rare

 

 

Gone:

Tachycardia, Panic attacks, Feelings of doom, Brain zaps, Itchy/crawly feeling skin, Breathlessness/Air hunger, Unregulated body temperature, Anger ,Hynogogia, Excess saliva, Phantom smells, Morning panic wake ups, Involuntary tongue movements, Overly aware of conscious thoughts, Fear of everything/inanimate objects I saw, Eyes rolling around involuntary when falling asleep, Teeth felt loose, Teeth nerve pain, Inner pendulum swaying feeling, Frequent urination, Pins and Needles especially on scalp, Electric shocks throughout body mostly in neck, Face muscles tightening up in corner of nose & eye, Urge to Scream, Tetris effects,Arms below elbows going numb, Poor concentration, Black spots in vision, Visual after images, Visual snow, Morning dread

 

This update was difficult to describe especially with the back and forth nature of this recovery. I'm not where I want to be yet, but I am thankful for the progress so far. I'm sure I just need some more time. I plan to update again in another 6 months. I hope everyone is seeing improvements. Hang in there Guys! I want to say a proper thank you to the mods and owners of this site. It has literally been a lifesaver!

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment

Hi waiting, I know what you mean about the hormones and monthly cycle affecting withdrawal. I also get the more intense symptoms the second half of the cycle. I recently had my hormones checked and it showed my progesterone was low but this is to be expected because when cortisol is up as it in withdrawals it depletes progesterone. I was told to take chaste berry but don't want to try it yet because of worried it will worsen my symptoms.  

 

I'm 4 months off Lexapro after a 4 month taper and still battling strong. You mentioned that your waking in panic/fear/ anxiety went away when did it because this is one of my relentless symptoms. Also the past few days intense fear over nothing has started as well. Did you have this and when did you find it went away? This fear is making me feel like I'm getting worse and  that I need to be on the meds again. 

 

Edited by Altostrata
approved post

May 2014 - July 2015 0.5 Clonazapam (cold turkey off)

October 2014 - November 2014 took Beta Blocker Propranolol (fast taper off)

December 2014 - began 2.5mg Lexapro worked up to 30mg Lexapro over 3 months

December 2014 - 2 mg Valium started sometimes took up to 6 mg Valium

April 2015 - started 25mg Lamictal worked up to 100mg Lamictal

April 2015  - began taper 4mg Valium. Stopped Valium 

July 2015 - stopped crumb of 2mg Valium

September 2017 began taper 30mg Lexapro.

February 2018 last dose Lexapro 1.25mg

October 2020 - Began 10% taper of Lamictal Dec 2019. was going ok until tapered from 45mg - 40mg. 

September 2023 - on the 13th of September 2023 I took my last dose of Lamictal 0.1mg. Finally psych med free!!

 

Link to comment
  • Mentor

Thanks for such a great update -- you have been through the WD wringer and so glad it is moving in a healing trajectory. Do you think the symptoms were mainly from Zoloft or from the others? It seems like zoloft but wondering your thoughts on it. I am 14 months out of sertraline withdrawal and never knew it was going to be so rough. I guess nobody here did.

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

Link to comment
  • Administrator
On 6/15/2018 at 2:54 PM, Hopetobefree said:

I'm 4 months off Lexapro after a 4 month taper and still battling strong. You mentioned that your waking in panic/fear/ anxiety went away when did it because this is one of my relentless symptoms. Also the past few days intense fear over nothing has started as well. Did you have this and when did you find it went away? This fear is making me feel like I'm getting worse and  that I need to be on the meds again. 

 

Hi, Hope. Most likely a small reinstatement will reduce those withdrawal symptoms. Please see your Intro topic.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to comment
  • 2 weeks later...
On ‎3‎/‎10‎/‎2017 at 12:54 AM, Waiting12 said:

I have a complicated history. Took Zoloft for 4 years and quit ct. wd showed up a year later but I didn't know it was wd as it was physical symptoms. My doctor told me it was probably stress and to restart Zoloft after being off of it for 1.5 years. I had an adverse or kindling reaction to it, then tried paxil and Celexa and each reaction was worse. Anyways... I haven't taken an AD for 4 months now.. its honestly torture every day. Just looking for the hope that it gets better at some point, even if bearable again. Thank you!

Dear Fellow Sufferer,

I have a similar history with reinstatement? Have things got better for you? I still feel awful, I'm in benzo withdrawal and have started tapering Venlafaxine.

 

good wishes

Buxi

2011-2015: Venlafaxine 150mg ext.

2.5.2015:last tablet: Venlafaxin 37.mg non-extended!

24.5.2015: Reinstatatement Venlafaxine 37mg ext. up to 150mg ext, in 2016: up to 225mg ext.

Since 37.5mg non-ext. severe symptoms, therefore reinstatement

Febr.2018: Start of tapering off venlafaxine 225mg ext., currently: 125mg.

Link to comment
  • 4 weeks later...
On 6/15/2018 at 4:54 PM, Hopetobefree said:

 

I'm 4 months off Lexapro after a 4 month taper and still battling strong. You mentioned that your waking in panic/fear/ anxiety went away when did it because this is one of my relentless symptoms. Also the past few days intense fear over nothing has started as well. Did you have this and when did you find it went away? This fear is making me feel like I'm getting worse and  that I need to be on the meds again. 

 

Hi htbf, the panic wake ups went away in stages for me. It gradually faded from pure adrenaline and fear into anxiety into morning dread into morning ‘blahs’ etc... The prior stage would show up again along with inner vibrations during a wave. For me, it’s been a 2 steps forward, 1 step back kind of process.

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment
On 6/15/2018 at 9:50 PM, FarmGirlWorks said:

Thanks for such a great update -- you have been through the WD wringer and so glad it is moving in a healing trajectory. Do you think the symptoms were mainly from Zoloft or from the others? It seems like zoloft but wondering your thoughts on it. I am 14 months out of sertraline withdrawal and never knew it was going to be so rough. I guess nobody here did.

Thanks fgw. My first ct from Zoloft was nothing compared to the adverse reactions. I was fully functional and knew something wasn’t quite right but couldn’t figure out what due to having mainly physical symptoms. Which is why I tried to go back on after 1.5 years. I ended up having a series of adverse reactions, each one more severe and harder to come back from than the last. It’s hard to say what’s what after all that.

 

I do still have a group of physical symptoms that are around from my original ct in early 2015 that I’m sure are from the 4 years I was on Zoloft. But everything debilitating & horror like was from the adverse reactions in 2016.

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment
On 6/30/2018 at 6:13 AM, Buxi said:

Dear Fellow Sufferer,

I have a similar history with reinstatement? Have things got better for you? I still feel awful, I'm in benzo withdrawal and have started tapering Venlafaxine.

 

good wishes

Buxi

Hi buxi. Things have gotten better, yes, no doubt. But I still have a long ways to go. 

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment
  • 2 weeks later...
On 7/22/2018 at 11:28 PM, Waiting12 said:

Hi buxi. Things have gotten better, yes, no doubt. But I still have a long ways to go. 

What adverse reaction you got...Did you reinstate at a high dose?

Hiw long did your reinstatement last?

Started escitalopram 10mg in March 2014,then reduced to 5mg....quit it in September 2016 CT...Had a withdrawal, was put again on 10mg one month later....

Again was reduced to 5mg then I Quit it again in December 2017 CT.... Started Having Withdrawals Since Feb 2018...

Doc reinstated me on 10mg of escitalopram on May 26 had a aDverse reaction...Stopped reinstatement

Still Off Meds

Now taking :

Omega 3

Link to comment
  • 2 weeks later...
On 7/31/2018 at 4:01 AM, Anubhav said:

What adverse reaction you got...Did you reinstate at a high dose?

Hiw long did your reinstatement last?

 

Mines a story with many components. Check out my first post on this thread. 

2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.

2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.

Drug free 12-16-2016
Month 1-20: +5% healing every month
Month 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)
Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific.

 

Link to comment

Please sign in to comment

You will be able to leave a comment after signing in



Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use Privacy Policy