Waiting12 Posted January 18, 2017 Author Share Posted January 18, 2017 Thanks aberdeen, I am so relieved to hear that you are doing well and the terror is gone. I hope with my full heart that my brain will heal as yours has. Hi all, I haven't posted in awhile. I am now 68 days since my last SSRI adverse reaction. I still feel basically non functional. I have been having small windows but yet to have a symptom free window. I will get windows from certain symptoms. My longest was 6 hours. I even had a small 5-10 minute window where I felt love and comfort while cuddling with my fiance. This was huge for me and my anhedonia because I haven't felt any positive emotions or connected to anything for anything in so long. I had a horrible 5 day wave in the beginning of January. Then i had a week or so where things were still very much bad but not unbearable. Now I'm back in an unbearable wave since yesterday. Continuous panic attacks that last hours filled with catastrophic thinking (of losing control, acting out of character, intrusive thoughts etc). After one ends I don't get very much time before the next one starts & never feel comfortable even in between. I don't even know what to do with myself when in a panic attack that long. My previous coping mechanisms were to breathe it out, positive self talk, and wait it out. Before all of this my attacks would last like 30 seconds to maybe 2 minutes. This is just unreal the suffering. I don't even know how to describe how irrational my thoughts get even though I counter them with logic it is very frightening to be stuck in survival/panic mode all the time. Utter frustration. Last week I was even able to watch a TV series for a few days and play video games. This week I haven't been able to handle the stimulation. I have still been trying to get out a little here and there. I have been babysitting my baby nephew, went out to eat at a crowded restaurant/bar, visiting my family and a close friend. All while feeling in a state of panic but it is good to know I have support. I find it hard to relate to others when feeling like this, very distracted, I have to fake my way through caring what everyone else is going through. I always seem to bring the conversation back to my condition. I have been keeping track of all my windows and have had a lot more so far this month than I did last month, but don't feel any overall improvement yet. This is so hard. The never knowing how you are going to feel hour to hour. I hate knowing I am so early on in this journey and it is inconceivable that this is going to be awful for a long while. My worst symptoms are still: unreal panic & anxiety, anhedonia, no appetite, poor sleep, neuro-emotions (fear, loneliness and helplessness), akathisia feeling that comes and goes, poor concentration, never feeling comfortable. A new symptoms came and it is terrible acne on my face, neck and back. **I finally got around to emailing my p-doc about all the information I found and well basically she didn't buy it. That was disheartening. She said she has never encountered a patient like me before that has had such extreme reactions/sensitivities to SSRIs and that I should start therapy. I think I am just rambling now. Any encouragement is welcome from others if you turned a corner after a couple months. I really need hope. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 18, 2017 Share Posted January 18, 2017 Hello, Waiting. I'm sorry that you're going through so much right now and sympathize with you greatly. But hang in there, it will get better. I'm glad that you're still doing things despite your symptoms. That's very strong of you to do that! That might help you in the long run of your recovery. Just remember that your symptoms mean healing is taking place. They may be bad right now, but in time they will lessen. The acne problem is something I had early on and it was awful! It did get better but it's possible this happens due to the hormonal changes our brains make, then once it's found a balance they go away. Do you sweat often during your panic and anxiety attacks? Perhaps exfoliation would do some good. There's no telling what the brain does to oil and skin production during withdrawals and recovery. Please hang in there, as it will get better in time! It may not seem like it right now, but it will! Stay strong, take care of yourself, and continue to try to go about life as it will help your process of healing. Best wishes and prayers to you! - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 18, 2017 Author Share Posted January 18, 2017 Thanks Dez, I have been sweating from my hands and feet constantly since my first adverse reaction in July. Night sweats come and go as well. I thought I was over that stage but woke up this morning soaked. It could be a diet thing too I guess I have been eating a lot of dairy to get in calories. It's hard to go from optimistic one week to feeling frantic like this won't change. It just has to get better- hope all is well for you. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 18, 2017 Share Posted January 18, 2017 You're very welcome.I'm glad you're having some windows at least, that's a good sign still! I'm proud of you, going out despite your fears. You're going to heal, I'm sure of it! It's okay to feel good one week and the next to feel like things won't change. I feel that us normal going through withdrawals. But it will get better. Perhaps it could be a diet change? I'm sure if you're sensitive to things then a change like that might do it. The body is very complicated. I've been pretty bad recently, but I think it's from my menstrual cycle. Hormones can really mess with withdrawal. But it'll get better, just need to plow through. Derealization has been horrendous lately though. Well just trudge through this storm till it's over! - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 18, 2017 Author Share Posted January 18, 2017 I'm scared of that time of the month too, when it comes I am so sensitive and emotional to everything, cry over anything. My DP/dr has been bad too I hate it. So much. It's really scary. I read a girls recovery story and she said it felt kind of like a bad acid trip for the first 8 months and I can agree with that so far. I'm sorry you've been bad. You've been having some good times too so hang on to the hope. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 18, 2017 Share Posted January 18, 2017 It's been difficult during this time of month, but it seems women have to go through all kinds of hormonal imbalances. Just do what you can to push through, cry when you feel you need to. With the DR I've been ignoring it for the most part. Sometimes I get a sudden panic when it gets bad because things don't seem real at all but then I can myself down and just observe it. It's really messed with my sense of touch, as when it's real bad I feel like 50% of my touch is gone, like it's been dulled down. Do you have this issue?? You're right, both of us have had some good windows, even if they're short. Let's be grateful for them! - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 18, 2017 Author Share Posted January 18, 2017 When I was on Paxil my sense of pain was really messed up. I remember I burnt my finger cooking with hot oil and it had a huge blister and now scar and I could hardly feel it. It was so weird. I don't doubt this can affect touch. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 18, 2017 Share Posted January 18, 2017 Wow, that's horrible! I can't imagine something like that. I'd rather feel something than not feel at all, honestly. Please be careful with yourself! Don't want any more burns. Keep your chin up and when things get bad, just tell yourself you'll get through this! It will pass and another good moment will come! - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 18, 2017 Author Share Posted January 18, 2017 Fortunately that feeling went away. I just hate feeling so on edge. I can seem to find an anxiety trigger in everything. I know I'm not scared of everything but it sure feels that way when in emergency mode. You're right, just waiting for another window. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 18, 2017 Share Posted January 18, 2017 Emergency mode will definitely make you feel that way. Talk yourself through it the best you can and try to tell yourself why you shouldn't be afraid of something. When I have anxiety I have to do that. Taking a shower with no one in the same room is something I still struggle with, but I tell myself the shower is a place of relaxation, it's not the cause of my fear, it's a safe place, etc. It seems to work. If that doesn't work I try singing a song I know, which gets me breathing properly if I know when to take a breath for each verse. Maybe these methods could help? - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 18, 2017 Author Share Posted January 18, 2017 Thank you so much, I'm so glad I found this site and others who understand. I'm glad I'm not alone even though this is awful. I do a lot of self talk but when my anxiety is constant it is really annoying to have to be stuck in your head all the time. I wish I could ignore it and go on, but it feels paralyzing during waves. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 18, 2017 Share Posted January 18, 2017 It's alright, it's good to know you're not alone. Anxiety and panic is definitely paralyzing. During those times, sometimes you just have to have some support from someone. Sometimes all you can do is hold on and ride out the storm, and though it's not fun at the time, it's okay to do that. If someone isn't there with you at that moment, try relying on yourself. It seems strange to do so, but people don't realize how strong they really are during these times. You are strong, you are brave, and what you're going through is normal. You will live through this and be an even stronger person in the end. Have faith in your ability to heal because you're an amazing person, even if you don't see it yet. - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 18, 2017 Author Share Posted January 18, 2017 Thank you so so much. I am usually alone at home all day, fiancé works long hours. But thank you. Each day is a day closer. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 18, 2017 Share Posted January 18, 2017 You're very welcome.will be praying for your healing!! - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 19, 2017 Author Share Posted January 19, 2017 Day three of this awful constant panic again. Idk if it is akathisia or constant panic attack but it is a nightmare. I can't concentrate on anything except for how sick i feel. Trouble breathing, fast pulse, racing thoughts, uncomfortable and an intense feeling of terror. The last time this came it lasted 5 days. I need this to let up soon i am so exhausted. It just feels like a never ending panic attack. I don't even know what to do with myself other than just lay here and ride it out. Yuck! Last night it let up a bit so i could sleep but at 6 am woke with panic. Praying for a window soon. I am so sick of this. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 Hang in there, Waiting. Just remember it's another wave and it'll pass. Have you tried getting up and doing things? I didn't get much sleep last night and woke up with anxiety, couldn't get back to sleep so I layed there for hours. Decided to get up and do things. It's much better now. Perhaps trying to move your body around and get your mind busy will help? I know it'll be hard to do but it could help. I also recommend reading the success story on here with the sunshine icon. I found it very inspiring and uplifting, perhaps it will help you as well. - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 19, 2017 Author Share Posted January 19, 2017 Thank you Dez, you are always so comforting to me. I'll try to go for a walk. I find that my decision making goes down the drain when I'm feeling so anxious. It's like I don't even know what to do with myself. Terrible. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 It's alright! These times are hard and sometimes you can't think through the fog, the pain, the terror. That's why we have to support one another. I'll do my best to support you whenever I can. You're always welcome to speak to me I hope you enjoy your walk. I'm sure I've spring comes, going outside will be a lot more enjoyable. It's really warm here so I've been preparing pots and soil for planting soon. Maybe in the future you could try gardening to ease your fears? I find it rather relaxing to be in nature. - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 19, 2017 Author Share Posted January 19, 2017 Thanks, I used to enjoy gardening. I haven't enjoyed anything in a long while now though. I am ready for spring just because it means more time has passed and the long cold winters here are kind of a drag. Just waiting for this wave to pass, hopefully sooner than later. I think its almost that time of the month for me which could have something to do with the ramp up in panic & restlessness. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 Yes, more time passed means more healing. It's possible it's that time of month. My mood dropped considerably when I got on it. I'm sure it'll be beautiful in the spring time. Is there anything you like to do in the spring? - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 19, 2017 Author Share Posted January 19, 2017 Idk before this I just worked and did homework a lot. My birthday is in the spring. Also like being outside and going four wheeling. Hopefully I'll feel up to that. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 Only time will tell. It gets better down the road. For r wheeling sounds like a lot of fun! I used to do that a lot when I lived on a farm with 600 acres of land. It exhilarating. I'm sure you'll be able to do it again Maybe when you're healed from this you'll try new things to add to your list of hobbies? There's so much in life to enjoy. Maybe you and your fiance can go camping sometime and enjoy the outdoors. I know this is really early but happy birthday! Just in case something comes up and I miss it. Mine is in February. - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 20, 2017 Author Share Posted January 20, 2017 Happy early birthday to you too Dez, 10 weeks today since my last SSRI. This bad wave is still going- day 4. Neuro-fear & terror. I have been just laying down trying to talk myself through it it is so bad. I feel scared of completly everything. What the heck!? I know I'm not and I keep telling myself that but my brain tells me everything is danger. Even washing my hair this morning freaked me out. My goodness. This organic fear is so confusing how it tries to attach itself to anything in your line of sight. My mind isn't scared of these things. Its just my poor damaged brain misfiring. I could deal with it if it wasn't constant, but right now it is. Also new symptom of hearing sensitivity to add to the tinnitus. My ears actually hurt with higher noises. Hence, laying here in the quiet is all I feel I can do until this passes. I hope this wave brings good healing soon because it feels like it's either trying to kill me or I'll go crazy. I'm still in shock that I'm still even in this situation. I want my brain back. I want comfort & peace. I want to laugh again. I want to feel anything other than fear and sadness. All I can do is just wait here curled up in a ball filled with this awful chemical fear. I think Its almost that time of the month for me as well which could have something to do with this. Miserable. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 You're very strong, Waiting. It's very hard dealing with absolute terror all the time, especially when you know you shouldn't be scared of anything. But you know you're not scared of it and that it's just your brain misfiring. That's good. It's a sign of your understanding of what's going on. You will be able to laugh again and have a normal life, most likely one that's better since you won't have the chemicals in your system. Try thinking about that. Think about the amazing things you'll be able to do once you're healed. It will get there! Look forward to those times and do your best to move forward. You're doing a great job so far, even if it doesn't seem like it. You're strong. You're brave despite you feeling this terror. You'll get through this. - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 20, 2017 Author Share Posted January 20, 2017 Thank you Dez, you keep me going. It's so hard to think anything positive in this moment. It's like I can't even remember what positive feels like. Even though I know I had a window of love and comfort earlier this week I just can't remember that feeling. I try to think back to positive things or forward and my thoughts are so overwhelmingly negative and I know that is not me at all. I was always the person to see the bright side of things and it makes me so sad. I hope I can report a window soon. I've heard the first 3 months are the worst after a bad reaction. I'm a little over 2 months. Hope that it will get better again is all I have left. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 You're welcome, Waiting. We all need support during these times. Even though others go through it, sometimes we can feel so alone. But you're not alone, ever. You have friends and family to support you as well. Positive thoughts are so hard to hold on to or even think of and that's okay, you're going through a lot and it's very common. I've been using an app from the Play Store called Bliss to help me through some things. It's kinda like positive psychology exercises to help rewire your brain to think positively. If I can think of anything positive sometimes I'll go back and read what I put down. Maybe when you feel positive you should write those feelings and thoughts down so you can read back over them during your hard times, knowing it was you who wrote it. It's very difficult, but it will be so much better in the end. Stay strong, sweetheart, after so many falls and getting up so many times you'll soon be able to fly. - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 21, 2017 Author Share Posted January 21, 2017 Thanks again Dez, I had a really terribly awful day. My mom came and got me and I'm spending the night at her place. We had a lot of company over tonight and I was so overwhelmed the entire time. I got through it though. Tonight my prayers were answered and I had the most calm peaceful window. Lasted about 45 minutes. It felt like pure relief and my racing obsessive thoughts were gone just like that. My muscles were relaxed, I could breathe well, everything just felt so natural. Quiet brain and could really talk with my mom about other things being fully present. I just felt the panic go. This whole week has felt like one big long panic attack. I feel it slowly slipping away back into anxiety land again now but I just felt so content. That was a good window. I wish it was longer...like forever. I had to write it down before I forget. My god what a difference. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 21, 2017 Share Posted January 21, 2017 I'm so happy you got a window! I'm also happy you were able to spend time with your mother. It seemed like it helped you out a bit. Your next window will also come, don't forget that. Every time you have a positive day or moment write it down so you can renege during your bad times. It'll get better and you have people supporting you to help you through this. Just keep waiting for that next window. You'll get better! - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 25, 2017 Author Share Posted January 25, 2017 Woke up in what felt like a wave again. Felt pretty much scared of everything. Tonight the fear has subsided a bit but the dark depression/anhedonia is still with me. This is so hard and scary. When I can't feel any positive emotions I can't remember how good my windows were to hang on to them. I know I've had them. Cmon brain. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 25, 2017 Share Posted January 25, 2017 Fear is one of those things that's hard for us to fight off, especially when we have no actual reason to be afraid. It's just your brain trying to heal from it all. It'll definitely get better, as you've seen the possibilities with your windows. Write down those positive moments and read them during these times. It's very hard to get through but you're strong, you're brave, you know you are. There's a big part of you that knows you can do this. She's just behind all that withdrawal noise rooting for you. Your real self is in there supporting you because she knows you can make it through this, because she knows this is just withdrawal symptoms. You got this, hang in there! - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 25, 2017 Author Share Posted January 25, 2017 Thank you Dez. You are so uplifting to me. What do I even do with myself when I feel over sensitive/scared of everything & feel no pleasure or interest? It's awful. I try to watch tv and feel scared. Talk to family and cry because I don't feel the love. I wish I could feel an interest in something again to help the days go by. This too shall pass. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 25, 2017 Share Posted January 25, 2017 You're very welcome, Waiting. It's hard to say what you find helpful during these times, but I can say what I've tried. I have two journals: one where I write about my day and say a prayer at the end and the other for me to just write in when I feel down. I've noticed that when writing in the second one, I'll start off feeling really down, but the more I write and get out the better I feel. It's like having someone to talk to in a way. Could even speak and record yourself. It'll get better in time. You've had windows and you know that you have, so you will have another. Look to those moments of hope. Know that you may not feel much right now or be interested in anything, but you will be later. You feel scared and you feel sad, you can feel other things as well. When you do, it'll be more amazing than you ever thought possible. - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 25, 2017 Author Share Posted January 25, 2017 :,) sending hugs thank you. You are absolutely right. Hope you are doing well today. 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 25, 2017 Share Posted January 25, 2017 You're welcome! Sending prayers for your healing! I'm still very sick but ever so slowly getting better! - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
Waiting12 Posted January 25, 2017 Author Share Posted January 25, 2017 You're in my prayers as well. Glad you're getting over that bug finally 2011-2014: 25-50mg Zoloft then CT via doctors advice. Some mild physical sx but fully functioning, unaware that withdrawal was a thing. Dr didn’t know why I was chronically dizzy with brain fog & advised to try Zoloft again.2016: severe adverse reactions to Zoloft (1 dose), Paxil (3 weeks), celexa (2 weeks), buspar (1 dose), lamictal (4 doses). Ativan 12 times within a month. Also tried Xanax & klonopin a couple times. Each reaction became more severe. Kindled. Became disabled from these meds.Drug free 12-16-2016Month 1-20: +5% healing every monthMonth 21- present: setback to acute from amoxicillin antibiotic (1 dose)Month 32- 11 months into setback from antibiotic. Seems I was floxed by amoxicillin somehow. Horrific. Link to comment
Dez Posted January 25, 2017 Share Posted January 25, 2017 I'm glad too, but trying to sleep is a nightmare. It'll get better, though, for both of us. - 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg (no issues, did well)- Mid 2012 Switched to Celexa 20mg (no issues with switch)- 6/16 Stopped Celexa (always took med once every other day, tapered to once every three days for about a week and a half, took one a week for one week, no problems)- 10/20/16 Started Celexa 20mg (next day had panic attacks, stopped after three days, kept having panic attacks and anxiety rest of the month)- 10/28/16 Started Paxil 20mg (took for almost a week, had suicidal thoughts/severe derealization, tapered off to one every other day for a few days)- 12/8/16 Buspirone 5mg twice daily (felt drowsy but kept anxiety under wraps, still taking it)- 12/27/16 Venlafaxine XR 37.5mg (took two days, migraine first day, headache all day second day, third day had severe depression/outbursts of crying, couldn't stop most of the day, bad invasive thoughts, never took third dose because of it)- 1/7/17 taper Buspirone 20% (miscalculation but doing well), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month to almost half each pill - 2/3/17 taper Buspirone 2.5mg twice daily (did fine, listened to body), gradually slivered off tablet throughout month * Aromatherapy 100% oils in diffuser every night * * Morning stretching routine every day * Link to comment
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