So - after reading countless stories on this subject, I am beginning to feel like I'm simply echoing countless previous posts and stories, so I'll try to be brief.
In October 2016 my girlfriend of two years went on Zoloft 50mg, which was quickly upped to 100mg in Dec. She was experiencing some depression and anxiety, and after being recommended to see a doctor by family/friends, was prescribed this drug.
She was very hesitant to try this, asking me and others to warn her if we noticed differences in her personality. Her changes seemed gradual over 4 months, but when you put all the pieces of the puzzle together it adds up to a huge change.
First I noticed sex declined - obviously I expected this.
Then I noticed she was being more emotionally distant, she didn't reply to texts, didn't rush home from work to see me, just felt like a connection was failing.
In January I put these peices together and confronted her about distance, and that she seems different - she told me she didn't like what she was becoming and was going to fix it. After this conversation I felt renewed hope for us. But alas, not 2 days later did I take a look at her messages on her phone. She had reems of sexts with a co-worker. It became clear that she had been having an affair for a full 2 months. My head was spinning - how did I not notice all of this happening at once?
I confronted her, and she had almost zero emotional response - just "yes, you're right" and "no it didn't mean anything" and "I don't know why that happened". I'm very conscious it's the medication causing this behaviour, as I could never dream of her acting like this without the pills. I wanted to get through it with her because we've always clicked perfectly - we were the perfect couple with very very minor issues. So I made her quit her job, cut off contact with this person and we've been sleeping separately since this happened. I try to talk to her about it, and the drugs, but she is very non-responsive, almost like a zombie.
When we were talking a few nights ago she said she loves me, but isn't 'in love' with me. - I immediately said it was the pills (as I've been reading alot about SSRIs recently) and she doesn't know if that's the case or not. She got frustrated and threw all her pills in the bin, adamantly going cold turkey. Shes a few days off the pills but doesn't seem any different. It breaks my heart because she is currently treating me like a friend and not a lover - it's very difficult.
We've decided to stick it out for a few months to see if coming off these pills will bring her back, along with her feelings for me. She's positive she was in love with me before starting these pills, so I have hope that her feelings will blossom back - but I am terrified they won't.
Part of me hopes in a week or two it will be as if a fog has lifted, but again, I'm terrified that won't happen.
Can anyone offer advice? Am I being unrealistic to think these feelings will come back for me?