Sometimes I am angry at the windows because they feel like false friends, they always disappear. It is so tiring dealing with the change. Acceptance doesn't come so easy when you're going through your nth transition from window to wave.
This right here - what you wrote, Kittygiggles - hits the nail on the head for me. I have been in a protracted anxiety wave of over a week now. But about 4 nights ago, something strange started to happen. After neuro-anxiety to the max all day, around 8pm I feel almost normal. Then it happens the next day. And the next.
But it was a false friend who did not show up last night, In fact, last night I got an anxiety surge at the end of the night. There had been no change in my routine. BUT... my wife did ask if I would do a favor for her the next day (now today) that filled me with dread because it contained many triggers (change in my routine, an addition to my commute, and the potential to encounter a family member who might ask me questions I don't want to answer).
(For the full explanation of that, and some relationship questions, see my post at http://survivinganti...nd/#entry281679 ).
Anyway, I doubt my false friend named Window will be showing up tonight after I actually do the favor...
I need to remind myself to breath right now,