Moderator Emeritus Shep Posted November 28, 2014 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 28, 2014 I can relate to a lot of what has been posted but I also have another problem that I think is related. Does anyone with dp/dr also have periods of time that seem to be "missing"? It's like I can sit down at the computer and start to read something and then a half an hour will disappear? I'm still looking at the very same paragraph, but time has simply vanished. I think it ties in with the dp/dr that I have but I'm not sure. I don't drink or do recreational drugs. My only med is 6.25 mg of Seroquel at night. I've had this for the past 8 months, but I'm wondering if it's connected to coming off of Klonopin too quickly in June. I also had it after a SSRI cold turkey last march in 2013. Does anyone else have this? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LoveandLight Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 I don't know if it's the same, but it feels like whole years are racing away without me! 2000 - sertraline for job anxiety low confidence (17 years old) ..which turned the next 16 years into nightmare! On/off sertraline severe withdrawals every time. 2014 - felt better as reduced dose of sertraline no more inner restlessness. Doctor rushed off again. Hit severe withdrawal. Lost the little I had in life. Couldn't get stable again on 12.5mg. Was switched to prozac. Had severe reaction to prozac..came off in November 2015 at 6mg as felt more confused and damaged on it..Even more withdrawal ..rage, depression, dyphoria, near constant suicidal ideation, self harm impulses, doom, concrete block in head, unable to do much of anything with this feeling in head..went back on 6mg of sertraline to see if would alleviate anything. It didn't..reduced from December to June 2016 came off at 2.5mg sertraline as was hospitalised for the severe rage, suicidal impulses, and put on 50mg lofepramine which in 2nd week reduced all symptoms but gave insomnia which still have..psych stopped lofepramine cold turkey..no increased withdrawal symptoms new symptoms from lofepramine except persistant insomnia which has as side effect. Taking Ativan for 8 months for the severe rage self harm impulses 1-3 times a week (mostly 2 times a week) at .5mg. Two months (I'm unsure exactly when the interdose started to happen) ago interdose withdrawal seemed to happen..2 days I think after the Ativan. Nightmare that could have been avoided! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barbarannamated Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 Shep, I do have missing chunks of time. Not as much as earlier in withdrawal, but still there. There is a name for this but I'm blanking on it. Edit to add: dyschronometria http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4152-dyschronometria-distorted-time-perception/?fromsearch=1 Pristiq tapered over 8 months ending Spring 2011 after 18 years of polydrugging that began w/Zoloft for fatigue/general malaise (not mood). CURRENT: 1mg Klonopin qhs (SSRI bruxism), 75mg trazodone qhs, various hormonesLitigation for 11 years for Work-related injury, settled 2004. Involuntary medical retirement in 2001 (age 39). 2012 - brain MRI showing diffuse, chronic cerebrovascular damage/demyelination possibly vasculitis/cerebritis. Dx w/autoimmune polyendocrine failure.<p>2013 - Dx w/CNS Sjogren's Lupus (FANA antibodies first appeared in 1997 but missed by doc). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frustrated Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 I think the five months that I have been off the Paxil have been nothing but a blur. I feel like I go through the motions in an empty shell with someone elses hands. It is like being trapped inside myself. I Cannot imagine living like this for years. 2002-put on amitryptiline for fibromyalgia. 10mg.2004-stopped abruptly. Didn't think it helped.2006 approx.-put on Paxil for mild anxiety 20 mg.2007 upped to 40 mg. not sure why.2011- tapered from 40 to 10. went nuts and went back to 20mg2014- tapered from 20mg to 0 from April to The end of June.current meds- Metformin(type 2 diabetic) and low dose aspirin.Take multi vitamin and vit b12, vit. D and magnesium. 5 months off Paxil. Still suffering.recently added 1.2mg of Paxil to alleviate withdrawals.(Nov 30)Dropped to .9mg because having symptoms from reinstatement.(dec 23)<p>taper to .76mg-.8mg (Feb 3) approx. weight .010 to about .008-.009 on scale..6mg (march 19th.) .5mg(April 19th).4mg(April 27th).2 (June 27th) 0mg. done taper at beginning of August. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus mammaP Posted November 29, 2014 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 29, 2014 I lose time too, it just seems to go and I haven't a clue what day it is or how long it is since I went out. Not so much now but it still happens in a wave. Through the 20 odd years since I entered the maniacal psych system and it's torturous treatments I've lost big chunks of time. Some holidays I cant remember, whole holidays and we didn't have many then! Family occasions, some very traumatic events that happened to people and I can't remember. It can be very embarrassing when they look at me and say they can't believe I can't remember THAT incident. I also know that feeling like you have somehow been carried through, not being aware enough to get through it yourself. It is all very surreal and to be honest I'm glad now that I can wonder where the time went, I don't really want to dwell on it, just glad that it has gone and my healing is moving forward getting better all the time despite the waves that come along and knock me off my feet sometimes. **I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge. Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem) 1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat 2002 effexor. Tapered March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads. Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013 Restarted taper Nov 2013 OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015 Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014 Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg July 2017 30mg. May 15 2018 25mg Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33 Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LoveandLight Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 Glad it has gone for you too, thank you for all your kind words also mammap xx 2000 - sertraline for job anxiety low confidence (17 years old) ..which turned the next 16 years into nightmare! On/off sertraline severe withdrawals every time. 2014 - felt better as reduced dose of sertraline no more inner restlessness. Doctor rushed off again. Hit severe withdrawal. Lost the little I had in life. Couldn't get stable again on 12.5mg. Was switched to prozac. Had severe reaction to prozac..came off in November 2015 at 6mg as felt more confused and damaged on it..Even more withdrawal ..rage, depression, dyphoria, near constant suicidal ideation, self harm impulses, doom, concrete block in head, unable to do much of anything with this feeling in head..went back on 6mg of sertraline to see if would alleviate anything. It didn't..reduced from December to June 2016 came off at 2.5mg sertraline as was hospitalised for the severe rage, suicidal impulses, and put on 50mg lofepramine which in 2nd week reduced all symptoms but gave insomnia which still have..psych stopped lofepramine cold turkey..no increased withdrawal symptoms new symptoms from lofepramine except persistant insomnia which has as side effect. Taking Ativan for 8 months for the severe rage self harm impulses 1-3 times a week (mostly 2 times a week) at .5mg. Two months (I'm unsure exactly when the interdose started to happen) ago interdose withdrawal seemed to happen..2 days I think after the Ativan. Nightmare that could have been avoided! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus WiggleIt Posted December 13, 2014 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted December 13, 2014 Is depersonalization the same thing as messed up depth perception? Everything looks too far away. I know that people are here, and I know that I am here, but everything looks too far away. *I'm not a doctor and don't give medical advice, just personal experience **Off all meds since Nov. 2014. Mentally & emotionally recovered; physically not-Dual cold turkeys off TCA & Ativan in Oct 2014. Prescribed from 2011-2014 -All meds were Rxed off-label for an autoimmune illness. It was a MISDIAGNOSIS, but I did not find out until AFTER meds caused damage. All med tapers/cold turkeys directed by doctors -Nortriptyline May 2012 - Dec 2013. Cold turkey off nortrip & cold switched to desipramine -Desipramine Jan 2014 - Oct. 29, 2014 (rapid taper/cold turkey) -Lorazepam 1 mg per night during 2011 -Lorazepam 1 mg per month in 2012 (or less) -Lorazepam on & off, Dec 2013 through Aug 2014. Didn't exceed 3x a week -Lorazepam again in Oct. 2014 to help get off of desipramine. Last dose lzpam was 1 mg, Nov. 2, 2014. Immediate paradoxical reactions to benzos after stopping TCAs -First muscle/dystonia side effects started on nortriptyline, but docs too stupid to figure it out. On desipramine, muscle tremors & rigidity worsened -Two weeks after I got off all meds, I developed full-blown TD. Tardive dystonia, dyskinesia, myoclonic jerks ALL over body, ribcage wiggles, facial tics, twitching tongue & fingers, tremors/twitches of arms, legs, cognitive impairment, throat muscles semi-paralyzed & unable to swallow solid food, brain zaps, ears ring, dizzy, everything looks too far away, insomnia, numbness & electric shocks everywhere when I try to fall asleep, jerk awake from sleep with big, gasping breaths, wake with terrors & tremors, severely depressed. NO HISTORY OF DEPRESSION, EVER. Meds CREATED it. -Month 7: hair falling out; no vision improvement; still tardive dystonia; facial & tongue tics returned -Month 8: back to acute, incl. Grand Mal seizure-like episodes. New mental torment, PGAD, worse insomnia -Month 9: tardive dystonia worse, dyskinesia returned. Unable to breathe well due to dystonia in stomach, chest, throat -Month 13: Back to acute, brain zaps back, developed eczema & stomach problems. Left leg no longer works right due to dystonia, meaning both legs now damaged -7 years off: Huge improvements, incl. improved dystonia Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UnfoldingSky Posted December 14, 2014 Share Posted December 14, 2014 Depersonalization as I understand it is a sense that you aren't yourself, like you aren't connected to your body. I'm not sure if this is part of the technical definition but I also didn't feel human when I had it. People often get derealization with it, which is a sense the world isn't quite real, like it's been distorted in some way, like it's a dream (or more like nightmare.) They are both dissociative states. What you are describing maybe would fall under derealization. I had lots of experiences where things seemed too far away or too close, or too big while I had DP/DR. I am not a medical professional and nothing I say is a medical opinion or meant to be medical advice, please seek a competent and trusted medical professional to consult for all medical decisions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pitykitty Posted December 16, 2014 Share Posted December 16, 2014 I totally relate to this - especially Shep. After dr. quack cold turkeyed me @massive meds, i had intense + incredible "blank-outs". I knew I hadnt blacked out b/c I would've been injured or crashed my car. I would just become "aware" on the side of the road or at home/work while performing a task. I'd look at clock + it would be minutes or hours later. I'd walk my dog + end up at a different park from where i'd started. Entire days would be missing. I was scared + dont know how I made it. Its been a few years since that horror, thank goodness. It does seem different than DP/DR, which I still get occasionally...especially during high-stress. But I will read those links to learn more. Strangely, no p-docs (past or present) seem willing to discuss it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SelmaLady Posted January 1, 2015 Share Posted January 1, 2015 My DR/DP has increased to such an intensity since I had to take PNC in Jan of last year. I have a very complicated drug history but I just don't know how to endure the constant escalation of this. The whole world inside and out is unreachable. And because my brain is constantly shrinking the space, everything is getting closer and closer. I just don't have any coping skills for this. I have been thru horrendous years of recovery from a bad c/t benzo w/d but that was doable because it remained constant. I have to find some reason to get thru today, to get thru the next minute. 1971-81 Valium 5mg c/t PAWS 1992- through now Zoloft 25mg 2003-05 Valium 12mg Slow Taper Off 2013 Afrin Exposure to CNS 2013 O/D Val 230mg 2013 Doxepin 50mg Clonidine 2mg Zoloft 25mg 3/15/16 Doxepin 49mg Micro Tapering Zoloft 24.3mg Holding taper 3/15/16 Clonidine mg 0.1 1/2 - Decreasing incrementally. DISCONTINUED 10/9/16 Doxepin 48.9 Zoloft 24.3 Clonidine 01.10 Continuing micro taper on Doxepin. 11/16/16 Doxepin 48mg Zoloft 24.3mg Clonidine 1.30mg 5/4/17 Doxepin 45mg Zoloft 24mg Clonidine 1.20mg Micro taper of Doxepin , Clonidine 01/13/19 Doxepin 45mg Zoloft 21mg Will start Micro taper of Doxepin 2/19 12/21/21 Doxepin 20 mg ? Reducing using water micro taper--Pulling 24ml from 75ml 12/2121 Zoloft .060 grams by weight--HOLDING (info from post added by CC: On 12/21/21 my dosage was .060grams by weight or 20mg. ) 26 Apr 2022 - Zoloft at -0- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SelmaLady Posted January 1, 2015 Share Posted January 1, 2015 Depersonalization as I understand it is a sense that you aren't yourself, like you aren't connected to your body. I'm not sure if this is part of the technical definition but I also didn't feel human when I had it. People often get derealization with it, which is a sense the world isn't quite real, like it's been distorted in some way, like it's a dream (or more like nightmare.) They are both dissociative states. What you are describing maybe would fall under derealization. I had lots of experiences where things seemed too far away or too close, or too big while I had DP/DR. I just saw this. At least I know that what I have is in the same neuro pathway! 1971-81 Valium 5mg c/t PAWS 1992- through now Zoloft 25mg 2003-05 Valium 12mg Slow Taper Off 2013 Afrin Exposure to CNS 2013 O/D Val 230mg 2013 Doxepin 50mg Clonidine 2mg Zoloft 25mg 3/15/16 Doxepin 49mg Micro Tapering Zoloft 24.3mg Holding taper 3/15/16 Clonidine mg 0.1 1/2 - Decreasing incrementally. DISCONTINUED 10/9/16 Doxepin 48.9 Zoloft 24.3 Clonidine 01.10 Continuing micro taper on Doxepin. 11/16/16 Doxepin 48mg Zoloft 24.3mg Clonidine 1.30mg 5/4/17 Doxepin 45mg Zoloft 24mg Clonidine 1.20mg Micro taper of Doxepin , Clonidine 01/13/19 Doxepin 45mg Zoloft 21mg Will start Micro taper of Doxepin 2/19 12/21/21 Doxepin 20 mg ? Reducing using water micro taper--Pulling 24ml from 75ml 12/2121 Zoloft .060 grams by weight--HOLDING (info from post added by CC: On 12/21/21 my dosage was .060grams by weight or 20mg. ) 26 Apr 2022 - Zoloft at -0- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
degen12 Posted January 22, 2015 Share Posted January 22, 2015 Is depersonalization the same thing as messed up depth perception? Everything looks too far away. I know that people are here, and I know that I am here, but everything looks too far away. The first day I woke up with depersonalization/derealization I felt like my eyes were further back in my head. The fan above my bed looked further away and everything looked 2d. People looked smaller as well. The more familiar or emotionally attached to something (like a family member or my bedroom) the more odd looking and distressing it was. This makes logical sense that if you have lost your sense of self all of the things that were important to that identity would return, visually, to a significance level that other people see them as. For example my car appeared smaller than it did before, but other people's cars did not seem to change. I realized that this was because my car normally appeared bigger to me because it had a great significance to me. (I was practically in love with it). There is a great overlap with the visual system and emotion centers in the brain. Some people with severe DP/DR have benefited from moving. 1 April / 2016: Cipralex 10 mg, Mirtazapine 30 mg, Lyrica 600 mg, Diazepam 20 mg, Bystolic 5 mg 2018: Lots of polypharmacy which is undocumented here. Started and stopped several drugs and changed doses of existing ones August / 2018: Back on track! Cipralex 15 mg, Mirtazapine 7.5 mg, Diazepam 15 mg September 2018: Cipralex 15 mg -> 12.5 mg October 2018: Cipralex 12.5 mg -> 10 mg, Mirtazapine 7.5 mg -> 3.75 mg -> Stopped, Diazepam 15 mg November 2019: Cipralex 5 mg, Diazepam 10 mg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daveguy2015 Posted January 24, 2015 Share Posted January 24, 2015 I have questions about depersonalization. I was on SSRI’s for 4 years and I stopped without proper taper (because I listened to my doctor). Now I feel like I'm on autopilot and then at times I feel this scary detachment sensation from my body, and also dizziness/vertigo. Like for a split second if im looking at the screen on my phone, or if i look at my hands, it feels like Im a different person looking at my body. Does this sound like depersonalization? Is this normal in SSRI withdrawal? How long could it last? Also it makes my baseline anxiety go really high, how do I stop this? I really need help and your responses are very much appreciated. Ritalin (forgot the dosages), 95'-00'Adderall 10mg for ADD, 00'- Jan 10'Lexapro 10mg, August 10' - March 14'Lexapro 15mg, March 14' - Sept 14'Prozac 10mg, Sept 14' - October, 24th 14'No meds since October 24th, 14' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted January 24, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted January 24, 2015 Hi Daveguy, I replied in your introduction thread. I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted January 26, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted January 26, 2015 Topics merged I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muddles Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 DP/DR - I'm not sure if I have this but I feel totally dead to the world...no emotions or connection with anything. I get a doom feeling whenever I look at anything. Feels like there is nothing in my head. No anxiety etc...just dead?? Does this sound like DP/DR? 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justwanttobefree Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 Holy **** am I scared. I had quite bad anxiety all day yesterday and when my husband got home from work I literally felt like he was a stranger. I couldn't really recognize him and I felt like I didn't know how to act around him. This caused me to have a severe panic attack until I finally fell asleep. Begging someone for reassurance because I've woken up and the anxiety is so severe. I can't stand the thought of this continuing like why would God take from me the one person I love the most :'( Diagnosed: Pure O Ocd, Severe Anxiety Disorder NOS, PMDD November 2009 - May 2013- CIPRALEX 20mg C/T off 20mg Cipralex Went into dark depression (never experienced before med) September 2013 - March 2014- PROZAC 20mg Weaned down to 10mg and held October 1st 2014 C/T off 10mg Prozac Protracted withdrawal - 8 months of the most horrific suffering imaginable June 1st 2015 - ZOLOFT 25mg June 26th 2015 - Dose increase to 50mg of Zoloft (taken at night after dinner). Slowly improving but still have severe OCD/ruminating, intense DP/DR, and brain fog. Just trying to stabilize at this point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horns85 Posted June 2, 2015 Share Posted June 2, 2015 Derealization seems to be my new symptom this week. Started last Thursday and is quite terrifying. Anyone here have updates and have gotten better? Lexapro from October 2012-October 2014 10mg from Oct 2012-Feb 2013, 20mg from Feb 2013-June 2013, 10mg from July 2013-April 2014Began taper via liquid Lexapro from April 2014-September 2014(Roughly 6 month taper)---0.00 on Oct 1 2014--WD began in December 2014 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reinstated to 10mg - 10mg Tablet October 15, 2015 - Stable by Mid-January, 2016 2016 - 9mg 3/26/16....8mg 5/11/16....7mg 7/05/16....6mg 8/26/16....5mg 10/31/16 2017 - 4mg 3/06/17....3mg 6/24/17....2mg 9/07/17...1.25mg 10/21/17....1mg 11/04/2017 2018 - 0.75mg 1/21/18....0.5mg 2/18/18....0.25mg 3/13/18....0.125mg 3/27/18....0.000 4/9/18 Supplements - 15B probiotic on and off. Usually helps w/ mood but sometimes is too activating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted June 2, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted June 2, 2015 I used to experience derealization quite severely. It would become extreme whenever I left the house and it was with me at home all the time to a lesser extent. Before I found this site, I didn't know what it was, so it was both terrifying and confusing and I kept trying to go out and expose myself to things, thinking that's what I needed to do, so I further traumatized myself. But when I learned what was going on, I stopped forcing myself to do things which made it worse so that I could reduce the stress. Things which made it worse included bright lights, crowds or even the presence of other people, noise, busy places. Just going outside on a sunny day would make it much worse, any kind of stimulation really. I always felt better later in the day, so I would wait until then to do anything I needed to do. But I think this is the symptom which caused me to become agoraphobic because going out and having it amp up was just so awful. Now this symptom is very much reduced. If it was as high as a 10 previously, now its down to between 1 and 3. I still don't like leaving the house, probably because of the bad memories, but the reality is, when I do, its nowhere near as bad as what it used to be like. This is a common withdrawal symptom and it will go away by itself, knowing that means you don't have to be scared of it, even though its very unpleasant. I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horns85 Posted June 3, 2015 Share Posted June 3, 2015 I used to experience derealization quite severely. It would become extreme whenever I left the house and it was with me at home all the time to a lesser extent. Before I found this site, I didn't know what it was, so it was both terrifying and confusing and I kept trying to go out and expose myself to things, thinking that's what I needed to do, so I further traumatized myself. But when I learned what was going on, I stopped forcing myself to do things which made it worse so that I could reduce the stress. Things which made it worse included bright lights, crowds or even the presence of other people, noise, busy places. Just going outside on a sunny day would make it much worse, any kind of stimulation really. I always felt better later in the day, so I would wait until then to do anything I needed to do. But I think this is the symptom which caused me to become agoraphobic because going out and having it amp up was just so awful. Now this symptom is very much reduced. If it was as high as a 10 previously, now its down to between 1 and 3. I still don't like leaving the house, probably because of the bad memories, but the reality is, when I do, its nowhere near as bad as what it used to be like. This is a common withdrawal symptom and it will go away by itself, knowing that means you don't have to be scared of it, even though its very unpleasant. Thank you, Petunia! That's makes me feel so much better. Great to hear this has lessend for you! I try very hard to accept the feeling but even as soon as a wake up and put my glasses on my vision feels so distorted. This seems to be with me all the time and worse when something stimulates it, just like you said. No matter how hard I try, it's the first thing I think about when I wake up which I know just makes it worse. Hopefully with time, I will be able to focus on it less and it will gradually fade away. Do you have any suggestions, besides time, to lessen the severity? Lexapro from October 2012-October 2014 10mg from Oct 2012-Feb 2013, 20mg from Feb 2013-June 2013, 10mg from July 2013-April 2014Began taper via liquid Lexapro from April 2014-September 2014(Roughly 6 month taper)---0.00 on Oct 1 2014--WD began in December 2014 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reinstated to 10mg - 10mg Tablet October 15, 2015 - Stable by Mid-January, 2016 2016 - 9mg 3/26/16....8mg 5/11/16....7mg 7/05/16....6mg 8/26/16....5mg 10/31/16 2017 - 4mg 3/06/17....3mg 6/24/17....2mg 9/07/17...1.25mg 10/21/17....1mg 11/04/2017 2018 - 0.75mg 1/21/18....0.5mg 2/18/18....0.25mg 3/13/18....0.125mg 3/27/18....0.000 4/9/18 Supplements - 15B probiotic on and off. Usually helps w/ mood but sometimes is too activating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted June 4, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted June 4, 2015 Do you have any suggestions, besides time, to lessen the severity? I wish I did, but unfortunately I can't say anything I tried helped with this symptom. As much as possible, avoid situations which make it worse, unless you can get used to feeling this way, I never did. Your comment about your vision feeling distorted might not actually be caused by derealization, although it may make it feel worse. Withdrawal can have effects on vision too, causing blurriness among other things. I used to have this problem in the mornings also. I also had a lot of problems early on with my reading glasses and kept changing between different strengths because my vision would keep changing, but that has settled down now also. See: Eye symptoms: floaters, blurred or dimmed vision etc I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horns85 Posted June 4, 2015 Share Posted June 4, 2015 Do you have any suggestions, besides time, to lessen the severity? I wish I did, but unfortunately I can't say anything I tried helped with this symptom. As much as possible, avoid situations which make it worse, unless you can get used to feeling this way, I never did. Your comment about your vision feeling distorted might not actually be caused by derealization, although it may make it feel worse. Withdrawal can have effects on vision too, causing blurriness among other things. I used to have this problem in the mornings also. I also had a lot of problems early on with my reading glasses and kept changing between different strengths because my vision would keep changing, but that has settled down now also. See: Eye symptoms: floaters, blurred or dimmed vision etc Thanks, Petunia. The vision thing is more like tunnel vision/things look far away. Kinda how you'd feel after a panic attack. From what I've read, seems like classic DR, but I don't know. I love to exercise and this is the first symptom I have gotten which seems to be really aggravated by exercise which is really depressing and anxiety provoking. The few moments of the day when I can distract myself, it does seem to get better. Unfortunately as you know, it's hard to not think about it when it's constant. Lexapro from October 2012-October 2014 10mg from Oct 2012-Feb 2013, 20mg from Feb 2013-June 2013, 10mg from July 2013-April 2014Began taper via liquid Lexapro from April 2014-September 2014(Roughly 6 month taper)---0.00 on Oct 1 2014--WD began in December 2014 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reinstated to 10mg - 10mg Tablet October 15, 2015 - Stable by Mid-January, 2016 2016 - 9mg 3/26/16....8mg 5/11/16....7mg 7/05/16....6mg 8/26/16....5mg 10/31/16 2017 - 4mg 3/06/17....3mg 6/24/17....2mg 9/07/17...1.25mg 10/21/17....1mg 11/04/2017 2018 - 0.75mg 1/21/18....0.5mg 2/18/18....0.25mg 3/13/18....0.125mg 3/27/18....0.000 4/9/18 Supplements - 15B probiotic on and off. Usually helps w/ mood but sometimes is too activating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horns85 Posted June 29, 2015 Share Posted June 29, 2015 This is by far my most distressing symptom. It's so hard to describe because I feel like I'm present except it always feels as if I'm looking through a fishbowl or behind a glass wall. The brain fog has lifted but it's impossible to ignore or not think about how everything looks. Days when my mood is better and I don't ruminate over it, I do notice an improvement, but it's always there. I don't know how people deal with this for long periods of time. I try to accept it but it's so difficult to not make anxiety worse, which fuels it. Gosh I hate this. I can only imagine the only way it goes away is once our mood lifts and we are able to not obsess over certain symptoms, it will lift. Hopefully sooner than later. Lexapro from October 2012-October 2014 10mg from Oct 2012-Feb 2013, 20mg from Feb 2013-June 2013, 10mg from July 2013-April 2014Began taper via liquid Lexapro from April 2014-September 2014(Roughly 6 month taper)---0.00 on Oct 1 2014--WD began in December 2014 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reinstated to 10mg - 10mg Tablet October 15, 2015 - Stable by Mid-January, 2016 2016 - 9mg 3/26/16....8mg 5/11/16....7mg 7/05/16....6mg 8/26/16....5mg 10/31/16 2017 - 4mg 3/06/17....3mg 6/24/17....2mg 9/07/17...1.25mg 10/21/17....1mg 11/04/2017 2018 - 0.75mg 1/21/18....0.5mg 2/18/18....0.25mg 3/13/18....0.125mg 3/27/18....0.000 4/9/18 Supplements - 15B probiotic on and off. Usually helps w/ mood but sometimes is too activating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus Dan998 Posted June 29, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted June 29, 2015 When I had DR/DP I found that having a conversation with someone in front of a mirror really helped to snap me back into reality. I discovered this technique by accident when I was having a haircut, I could see my facial expressions and my mouth moving whilst I was speaking, it felt strange at first, but it reinforced my connection with the world again. 2001: 20mg paroxetine2003-2014: Switched between 20mg citalopram and 10mg escitalopram with several failed CT's2015: Jan/ Feb-very fast taper off citalopram; Mar/ Apr-crashed; 23 Apr-reinstated 5mg; 05 May-updosed to 10mg; 15 Jul-started taper; Aug-9.0mg; Sep-8.1mg; Oct-7.6mg; Nov-6.8mg; Dec-6.2mg2016: Jan-5.7mg; Feb-5.2mg; Mar-5.0mg; Apr-4.5mg; May-4.05mg; Jun-3.65mg; Jul-3.3mg; Aug-2.95mg; 04Sep-2.65mg; 25Sep-2.4mg; 23Oct-2.15mg; 13Nov-1.95mg; 04Dec-1.75mg; 25Dec-1.55mg.2017: 08Jan-1.4mg; 22Jan-1.25mg; 12Feb-1.1mg; 26Feb-1.0mg; 05Mar-0.9mg; 15Mar-0.8mg; 22Mar-0.7mg; 02Apr-0.6; 09Apr-0.5mg; 16Apr-0.4mg; 23Apr-0.3; 03May-0.2mg; 10May-0.1mg Finished taper 17 May 2017. Read my success story I am not a medical professional. The information I provide is not medical advice. If in doubt please consult with a qualified healthcare provider. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluebalu86 Posted July 6, 2015 Share Posted July 6, 2015 These are my main symptoms right at the moment. They're very difficult to describe. I feel extremely mentally confused and everything seems weird and surreal and scary and not normal. I get surges of weird feelings overcoming me. Don't know how exactly to explain this, but it's terrible and makes it hard for me to function. I also feel like there's something wrong with the way my eyes process reality. My brain can't function properly. I feel like I'm in a daze. Is this common? It's very scary. I suffer from depression, anxiety, pure-o ocd, and panic attacks since 2004. Been on multiple different psychiatric drugs since 2006. Never had a significant WD problem before, only brain zaps for a month and then I'd be fine...............Been on Cipralex (escitalopram) 15 mg and Fluanxol (flupentixol) 1 mg since Sep 2014. Stopped taking the Cipralex after a fast 20-day taper.Took the last 5 mg Cipralex on Feb 5th, 2015. Then took Seroxat (paroxetine) 10 mg for a week, and stopped it too. Severe WD started suddenly on Feb 16th. RI 5 mg Cipralex on Feb 18th, 2015. RI worked and was relatively stable for a while................April 7 - decreased Fluanxol from 1 mg to 0.5 mg and took it at this dose for a week. - BIG MISTAKE; April 13 - WD starts creeping in; April 14 - RI full dose of Fluanxol 1 mg => severe muscle twitching and jerking when trying to relax and fall asleep, overwhelming sense of doom, dread, terror, and horror, insomnia, hoping to stabilize.Tried doing a 10% cut off Fluanxol in the end of May for a few days, but quickly updosed to full dose because the twitching returned.Experiencing waves and windows in the following months.Unsuccessful brief taper attempt of Fluanxol by 5% on November 1st. Symptoms hit the next day. Too scared to continue tapering, reinstate full dose.Severe crash in November after stupidly trying a barbiturate on November 9th. Grave mistake. Sense of unshakable inescapable internal torture, like my soul is in hell being tortured, terror/horror/dread/doom (probably akathisia?) that gets especially bad when trying to relax and fall asleep, muscles twitch, jerk and move on their own, shaking, insomnia, can't eat, confusion, disorientation, brain not working normally. Never felt so bad in my entire life. Never experiment with other meds while in WD! Praying to God I stabilize and get back to my baseline.December - things getting even worse. January - unbearable suffering Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a99 Posted July 6, 2015 Share Posted July 6, 2015 this is very common in withdrawal , I think it's called derealization , I had it non stop for several months , it's getting a tiny bit better . it's definitely very scary and weird . On and off prozac from 2010 -2014 . Several failed fast tapers and reinstatements . Cold turkey : March 2014 . ----------------------------------------- took lysanxia 40 mg a day for almost a year november -14- 2018 weaned to 30 mg november -26- 2018 weaned to 20 mg symptoms that got better : fatigue current symptoms : severe anxiety one rescue dose (10 mg ) december -15 -2018 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marta Posted July 6, 2015 Share Posted July 6, 2015 I also try to study, programming and writing..it's very VERY hard. This anxiety/sense of void makes my brain work sooo slow, I am also very confused,sometimes I also fail words when I speak.....and I do 20% of what I should do...at least low progress is better than no progress...but for me that I need to use physics and maths to work is a very HARD challenge...poor me!!! 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katieb Posted July 6, 2015 Share Posted July 6, 2015 This nasty sympton has just raised its ugly head again for me.I haven't had it for a good while and thought it was over.soo frustrating Been taking paroxatine for approx 15 years.Tried a few times yo stop but failed. Am currently on 3.5mg liquid Jan 2016 been slow tapering paroxatine and i am currently at 2.9 mg and last drop was 5 weeks ago. Started to feel awful about 3 weeks ago with brain ???? , shakes, blurred vision and dizzyness. .. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imlost2 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 I get the same symptoms too i cant even look at ,my self in the mirror because i dont reconize my self and then my fear of going mad hits me really bad . may 1997 break down tried tofranil,Haldol for 2 months,july 97 paxil 20mgs my doctor coldturkey paxil on2002.20mgs celexa and my doctor switched me to Lexapro 10mgs in 2005 no tapper in 2009 I tried to stop Lexapro too fast then I reinstated and had a bad reaction switch to pristiq 50mgs for 4 months real bad move and I was put on Xanax 2mgs but it made my anxiety worse the klonopin 2mgs was prescribed in 2009 in 2010 I tapered for one year free from benzos since feb 2011 and left with 10 mgs celexa in 2013 I started my slow tapper 10 mgs in a year so I m antidepressant free since july 2014. So here is my drug history tofranil,Haldol,paxil,celexa,Lexapro,lamictal,Xanax,klonopin,ativan,pristiq. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted July 7, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted July 7, 2015 Here is the DP/DR topic: Derealization/Depersonalization - Surviving Antidepressants I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
erer Posted July 9, 2015 Share Posted July 9, 2015 These are my main symptoms right at the moment. They're very difficult to describe. I feel extremely mentally confused and everything seems weird and surreal and scary and not normal. I get surges of weird feelings overcoming me. Don't know how exactly to explain this, but it's terrible and makes it hard for me to function. I also feel like there's something wrong with the way my eyes process reality. My brain can't function properly. I feel like I'm in a daze. Is this common? It's very scary. I have this too and it is one of the most terrible side effects I know and most difficult to bear. I have this intensely right now. 2,5 years of slowly tapering down Cymbalta from 60 mg. Then tried going from 8,44 mg to 1 mg in 8 days. (April 1st 2015). That's when the real hell started. Reinstated. Didn't help. I was added Ativan (2 mg 2 times a day for relentless akathisia that started with jumping Cymbalta). For years had been taking Zopitin 7,5 mg and Stilnox 10 mg for I had not been able to sleep naturally since the 1st day I started Cymbalta). Used to take Xanax occasionally. All of the above were stopped cold turkey when I was hospitalized in the beginning of May 2015. Prior to that I have been on and off the whole spectrum of different AD-s for 15 years (since I was 17). My introduction. Tapering: Olanzapine (starting point 2,1 mg): Jan 2016 /---/ April 2018 0 mg. (From 2,1 mg to 0 mg in 1y 3mo). Diazepam (starting at 5 mg) : switching to liquid May 2018; 4,6 mg (June 2018) /---/ 0 mg (Feb 2020) (From 10 to 5 - nobody knows, from 5 to 0 in 1 y 10 mo) Valdoxan (starting at 25 mg): switching to liquid (Feb 2019) /---/ 0 mg (July 2020) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horns85 Posted July 10, 2015 Share Posted July 10, 2015 I have this too now. Started about 6 weeks ago at around 8 months off. I have experienced mild forms of this prior to drugs during the few panic attacks I had. Then it only lasted a few hours and I never really thought anything of it. The Derealization I have experienced in WD varies in intensity but is constant and different. A glass wall feeling in my vision along with brain fog. It's very very annoying and has been constant. From the good folks on here and everything I have read, it will pass in time, but can linger for quite a while. It did lift for about an hour one Saturday when I was in what felt like a window and I forgot about it. Here's to hoping this all passes sooner rather than later for us. It will in time. Lexapro from October 2012-October 2014 10mg from Oct 2012-Feb 2013, 20mg from Feb 2013-June 2013, 10mg from July 2013-April 2014Began taper via liquid Lexapro from April 2014-September 2014(Roughly 6 month taper)---0.00 on Oct 1 2014--WD began in December 2014 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reinstated to 10mg - 10mg Tablet October 15, 2015 - Stable by Mid-January, 2016 2016 - 9mg 3/26/16....8mg 5/11/16....7mg 7/05/16....6mg 8/26/16....5mg 10/31/16 2017 - 4mg 3/06/17....3mg 6/24/17....2mg 9/07/17...1.25mg 10/21/17....1mg 11/04/2017 2018 - 0.75mg 1/21/18....0.5mg 2/18/18....0.25mg 3/13/18....0.125mg 3/27/18....0.000 4/9/18 Supplements - 15B probiotic on and off. Usually helps w/ mood but sometimes is too activating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
helpless Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 same here 24 / 7 over a year. Not having controll over your thoughts and emotion, confusion, no inner monolouge in my head, absolutly dead inside, no personality, can't think about the past or the future, not able to sleep and if then waking up confused, not able to plan, no creativity... like my whole brain has been fried or cut out, my soul taken, my mind raped... whole day suicidal. Those is no ******* medicine, its a ******* torture, antilife, antihumanity, lobotomypill, or suicideidpill would be better name for them. Worst ******* possible death to every doctor who prescribing it like candy and endless suffering in hell with same symthoms, their families should be ******* raped and killed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluebalu86 Posted July 13, 2015 Share Posted July 13, 2015 I hear you helpless. I feel the same way about these doctors and their "medications". I hope they burn in hell for eternity. I suffer from depression, anxiety, pure-o ocd, and panic attacks since 2004. Been on multiple different psychiatric drugs since 2006. Never had a significant WD problem before, only brain zaps for a month and then I'd be fine...............Been on Cipralex (escitalopram) 15 mg and Fluanxol (flupentixol) 1 mg since Sep 2014. Stopped taking the Cipralex after a fast 20-day taper.Took the last 5 mg Cipralex on Feb 5th, 2015. Then took Seroxat (paroxetine) 10 mg for a week, and stopped it too. Severe WD started suddenly on Feb 16th. RI 5 mg Cipralex on Feb 18th, 2015. RI worked and was relatively stable for a while................April 7 - decreased Fluanxol from 1 mg to 0.5 mg and took it at this dose for a week. - BIG MISTAKE; April 13 - WD starts creeping in; April 14 - RI full dose of Fluanxol 1 mg => severe muscle twitching and jerking when trying to relax and fall asleep, overwhelming sense of doom, dread, terror, and horror, insomnia, hoping to stabilize.Tried doing a 10% cut off Fluanxol in the end of May for a few days, but quickly updosed to full dose because the twitching returned.Experiencing waves and windows in the following months.Unsuccessful brief taper attempt of Fluanxol by 5% on November 1st. Symptoms hit the next day. Too scared to continue tapering, reinstate full dose.Severe crash in November after stupidly trying a barbiturate on November 9th. Grave mistake. Sense of unshakable inescapable internal torture, like my soul is in hell being tortured, terror/horror/dread/doom (probably akathisia?) that gets especially bad when trying to relax and fall asleep, muscles twitch, jerk and move on their own, shaking, insomnia, can't eat, confusion, disorientation, brain not working normally. Never felt so bad in my entire life. Never experiment with other meds while in WD! Praying to God I stabilize and get back to my baseline.December - things getting even worse. January - unbearable suffering Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Purplestars22 Posted July 13, 2015 Share Posted July 13, 2015 Helpless, my symptoms are similar to yours but hopefully they will lift soon. Celexa 20mg 2008-2012 for Social Anxiety Failed attempt to stop reinstated 1 year taper skipping doses Celexa free 12/2013 1/2014-5/2014 took 5 htp every other day Failed Reinstatement 5mg of Celexa on 12/2014 for 5 days only Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horns85 Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 Anyone get bridge of nose/head pressure with their derealization? Tends to make my vision worse which is already bad with the DR. Or could this just be anxiety which seems to be the basis Derealization? Thanks! Lexapro from October 2012-October 2014 10mg from Oct 2012-Feb 2013, 20mg from Feb 2013-June 2013, 10mg from July 2013-April 2014Began taper via liquid Lexapro from April 2014-September 2014(Roughly 6 month taper)---0.00 on Oct 1 2014--WD began in December 2014 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reinstated to 10mg - 10mg Tablet October 15, 2015 - Stable by Mid-January, 2016 2016 - 9mg 3/26/16....8mg 5/11/16....7mg 7/05/16....6mg 8/26/16....5mg 10/31/16 2017 - 4mg 3/06/17....3mg 6/24/17....2mg 9/07/17...1.25mg 10/21/17....1mg 11/04/2017 2018 - 0.75mg 1/21/18....0.5mg 2/18/18....0.25mg 3/13/18....0.125mg 3/27/18....0.000 4/9/18 Supplements - 15B probiotic on and off. Usually helps w/ mood but sometimes is too activating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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