Dar: Hello! Can you help me decide?

[Dar]

Hi everyone, I'm new here. I'd just like to get some opinions and advice if you have it about what my options are. I'm currently trying DESPERATELY to recover from this insane CT nightmare I've done twice now with Celexa. I don't have a complicated history...just a dumb Dr. This is the only drug I've ever used but as you can see I used it a REALLY long time, 10 years. I was put on it originally bc I had 3 small children, a full-time job and was feeling over-whelmed and stressed out, really simple, dumb story. I was gullible. I have never been depressed and up until a year ago I never had a panic attack or really any issues with anxiety. I'm in my late 40's. I think I continued to use the drug bc it made my muscles feel so relaxed and it calmed me. In short, I liked it, it was a good fit.

 

Into year 10 I got lazy and started missing a dose here and there. One time I went 5 days w/o (xmas 2010) it and experienced my first panic attack. So I got suspicious and finally started researching. Yea I know STUPID!!!!! STUPID ME!!! but in my defense my Dr. was always telling me this is a completely safe, benign drug, you don't need to worry about anything and blah, blah, blah...I'm sure you've heard this before. I quit CT and tried to reinstate 4 mos. later. I didn't do that well either. I gave it 7 weeks but it was a roller coaster of playing with doses and all I wanted to do was throw the stuff away. During this time I found PP and it was a godsend but unfortunately they won't give any advice on what drug to take when.

 

Ok so now I'm 6 mos. into this wd and things seem to be going from bad to worse. There doesn't seem to be any end in sight. I won't bore you with the details...I've got severe anxiety and crushing depression. It's bad! I've read this could take years to rectify. To put it simply, this is too hard, and I don't think i'll last that long In fact, I have my doubts to whether this is even humanly possible, this CT business. The accounts I've read aren't good.

 

So what I'd like to know is if I were to go back to another drug should I try Celexa AGAIN? The first reinstating experience I had was NOT good, but I think I tried to go too high, 20 mg. too fast. Idk, it's just my theory that it was too much of a shock to my system at the time. But six months have passed now. I have an rx for Prozac that the Dr. gave me last week, it's just sitting here on my dresser. Idk what to do. I'm too scared to do anything...the good thing about that is the days do keep piling on. But I'm just missing out on too much. My kids are in high school and I want so much to be present and a part of their lives, these last few years I have with them. I keep asking myself is this worth it.

[xDebbiejo]

Hi Dar

 

Welcome to the site !

 

You have come to the best site for help and support.

 

I did exactly the same as you but when finding this site I was only two months off of Paxil/seroxat before reinstating.

I have been on AD's for nearly 17 years. I am now stable at 8mg. It took a while for me to find relief.

 

I'm so sorry you're suffering and hope you find relied soon.

Someone should be along shortly to help and.advise you.

 

Debbie x

[tezza]

Hi Dar, welcome to the forum.

 

I'm sorry about your predicament.

 

You stated that on your first reinstatement of Celexa it was a roller coaster...playing with doses. It's very important to stay on a decided dose for a period of time and allow your nervous system to adjust to it. If you were going up and down with your dose that could be a reason for the roller coaster effect. Did your dose vary the second time you tried to reinstate?

 

 

If you jerk the dose up and down it's like jerking your brain back and forth so it doesn't know what to expect next. The nervous system loves stability.

It may take at least two months on a steady dose to stabilize.

 

 

You won't bore anyone with details, in fact, the more details you provide will allow better evaluation of your situation.

Alto will have very good advice for you, I'm sure.

[Altostrata]

Welcome to our community, Dar.

 

I'm afraid I can't tell you what drug to take to counter prolonged withdrawal syndrome. Some people can go back onto an antidepressant and some find it makes them worse.

 

What are your symptoms now?

[Dar]

Welcome to our community, Dar.

 

I'm afraid I can't tell you what drug to take to counter prolonged withdrawal syndrome. Some people can go back onto an antidepressant and some find it makes them worse.

 

What are your symptoms now?

 

I know, I kind of figured...

 

I'm just a loss of what to do. My GP, although a nice man, doesn't really have a clue what to do with me....he keeps suggesting I need to see a psychiatrist and trying to show me how on my insurance card there's a 1-800 #....to find one... lol. Well i went reluctantly for the first time ever and she told me I was doing the right thing trying to get off these drugs. That was after the 2nd month. A month later I went back and told her I was still having a really hard time and maybe she was wrong, and she suggested Pristiq....after reading about what it was all about I didn't want to have anything to do with that. So I feel really stupid, here I was practically begging for a prescription and when I finally got her to give me one I ran for the hills.

 

Prozac or Celexa, they don't sound quite as horrible as some of these others....I should mention right after I cold turkeyed the first time I went nuts and my Dr. had me try Zoloft for a month. Yea that didn't go over too well, I went bizzerck. So I won't be trying Zoloft again.

 

Right now I'm not taking supplements. I'm afraid to put anything in my body. I used to take a multi-vitamin, fish oil and magnesium. I tried 5HTP and found it did help with my depression but did nothing for anxiety. That's what I've been experiencing lately...non-stop extreme anxiety. But its the fear i find impossible to live with. I feel extremely disconnected with the world and scared of EVERYTHING. I have two therapists, a guy I "talk to" and another who is doing CBT exercises with me. I have a wonderful husband, 3 beautiful kids and what most would consider a pretty ideal life...I just can't seem to enjoy it..

 

I figured whatever I try I'm going to start with a very small dose and see how I respond. As for it getting worse I just don't think that's possible. These past 6 mos. , the failed reinstatement, the 4 mos. off previous to that, it's all just been a horrible nightmare.

 

Does anyone know this Dr. In Pasadena who is recommended here? Stuart Shipko? He's only about an hour away. I figure if I'm going to do this I really am going to need a pro.

 

Anyway, thank you so much for your responses, one way or another I'm going to figure this out.

[Dar]

Hi Dar

 

Welcome to the site !

 

You have come to the best site for help and support.

 

I did exactly the same as you but when finding this site I was only two months off of Paxil/seroxat before reinstating.

I have been on AD's for nearly 17 years. I am now stable at 8mg. It took a while for me to find relief.

 

I'm so sorry you're suffering and hope you find relied soon.

Someone should be along shortly to help and.advise you.

 

Debbie x

 

Wow, 17 yrs.! I didn't know that was possible. And it still works? That must be some sort of record....I'm happy for you And thanks for the kind words.

[xDebbiejo]

Hi Dar

 

Lol . Some people have been on for 20+ years !

 

I don't think mine work anymore but they have nothing to work on. Originally was on them for post natal depression

My GP always would say that it was not a good time to come off when I had stressers in my life.

 

Silly really as there's always something happening in life.

I should not have listened to her.

 

Do hope you find relief soon

 

Debbie x

[areyouthere]

I have a wonderful husband, 3 beautiful kids and what most would consider a pretty ideal life...I just can't seem to enjoy it..

Dar...this really popped out at me. I'm so sorry about where you are. I have three grown children and now two grand children and am just discovering how these drugs affected me. As Debbie said, there are some of us on these drugs a long time... me since 1995!! Yeah, I'm a little slow to the party.

 

one way or another I'm going to figure this out.

 

YAY! You have an awesome attitude!!! You mentioned exercising. That is a BIG BONUS to you too!!! I raise my glass to both of those!!

 

As I have just started a taper myself... Lexapro, the AD just a month ago and it is so far ( knocks on wood) going ok, I have little advice, just empathy , encouragement and a big "WE CAN DO IT!" that seems to be the mantra around here!

 

I've heard of this Dr. Stuart, and if he sees people and I lived an hour away you can bet I'd be looking into that too. Others will be coming around to help you out with that.

 

I have three grown children... my story isn't much different than yours ( three kids, work, stressed..put on meds etc etc) just like I said I'm a little late.

 

The accounts I've read aren't good.

 

Be careful with this one. As others have pointed out to me , the "easy" ones aren't in cyber space to read and the success stories are there, but a little harder to find. There is a thread here about success stories... don't short change yourself into thinking you can't handle this.

[Nikki]

If you jerk the dose up and down it's like jerking your brain back and forth so it doesn't know what to expect next. The nervous system loves stability.

It may take at least two months on a steady dose to stabilize.

 

 

You won't bore anyone with details, in fact, the more details you provide will allow better evaluation of your situation.

Alto will have very good advice for you, I'm sure.

 

 

This is so true and it is with any drug.

 

I am on Celexa and I am in the process of lowering the dose from 40mgs. in stages. I am tapering onto Imipramine which helps me with anxiety. My story...I am not advocating, as these drugs seem to have a mind of their own.

 

When I have reinstated meds I did go right back to the original dose and felt better right away....HOWEVER...when going CT, or messing with doses, reinstatement doesn't work some of the time. I never CT'd.

 

So glad you didn't take Pristiq. Very difficult to get off of.

 

I have heard of that Dr. and there might be posts on this site about him. Maybe Alto knows who he is....

[Altostrata]

I hate to suggest going back on psychiatric drugs. I only suggest reinstatement in order to get people off them finally.

 

If I were you, Dar, I'd try only a fractional dose of anything. It's likely your system has been sensitized by all your drug changes. It's possible a very low dose of lamotrigine might help with the anxiety and calm your nervous system.

 

It would be well worth your while to see Stuart Shipko and discuss all of this with him.

[tezza]

Hi Dar,

 

If you decide to take celexa or Prozac, I strongly urge you to get liquid. It is MUCH easier to get a precise dosage and this is important for when you begin tapering.

 

I had to insist in order to get liquid Risperdal because my GP didn't know about the tiny 1mL syringe. I actually had to take one and show it to him. Unfortunately, doctors are very uneducated or misinformed about coming off psychotropics.(I was taking half of a 1mg pill at the time and Risperdal comes in 1mL per 1mg)

 

The psychiatrist that first prescribed was totally uncooperative in helping me come off the four meds he put me on. He prescribed them when I was grieving the loss of my brother that I'd cared for the last three weeks he lived. I explained to him that I was sad but had good reason to be sad.

 

It sounds like your pdoc is much more understanding. I utterly despise the pdoc I saw. Sorry if that's TMI but this is the only place many of us have to get our feelings out. You should never feel that you will bore us with details of your situation, that's what we're here for. This is the most loving, helpful, understanding and supportive place you could have ever found.

 

When I finally got the liquid and could accurately measure my dosage, I stayed at that dose for three months to allow my brain ample time to adjust to cuts I had made in pill form that probably weren't exact.

 

It's different for everyone so you have to listen to your own body. I sincerely hope you can make the choice that works best for you.

 

Hugs and healing,

 

Tezza

[Dar]

I hate to suggest going back on psychiatric drugs. I only suggest reinstatement in order to get people off them finally.

 

If I were you, Dar, I'd try only a fractional dose of anything. It's likely your system has been sensitized by all your drug changes. It's possible a very low dose of lamotrigine might help with the anxiety and calm your nervous system.

 

It would be well worth your while to see Stuart Shipko and discuss all of this with him.

 

Thank you for responding. I'll call Dr. Shipko tomorrow. If I did try a fractional dose of Celexa, Prozac or this lamotrigine which I'm not familiar with...what then? How long should i stay at that minimal dose? This is where i get confused....sorry. Do I keep trying to raise the dose to a therapeutic level or what exactly happens? I don't know if I want to get on and stay on...I'm rather repulsed at that idea, all I want is some relief. I was always on 20mg. of Celexa. When I tried reinstating the first time I went there after a week at 10mg and it was a catastrophe. I don't want the same thing to happen. (thanks again

[Altostrata]

Hard to tell, Dar. This is why seeing Dr. Shipko would be a good idea.

 

Very sorry you went through cold turkey twice.