brassmonkey

Brassmonkey: Talking about myself

1,169 posts in this topic

Merged with Brassmonkey's original Intro topic.

 

Welcome, all.

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@Greg-- you could be right.  Yesterday I copied and pasted all 87 pages of it, one at a time naturally, so I wouldn't loose all the information in it.  Took for ever for my computer to save the document.

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Hi Brassmonkey,

I once spent a weekend reading through your entire journal on PP, it was about a year ago, so probably not as long as it is now.  I was fascinated to read about the time and effort you and your wife put into Halloween activities each year. :)

 

Its good to read that your slide taper is still going so well.

 

So, welcome (back) to SA, and to the other PP refugees.

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Hi Tom, I've just joined over here now.  I had a feeling I joined this forum when it first started but I couldn't figure out what my sign-on was if I did.

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Hi Songbird--glad you could make it over, seems like a lot of the gang made it.

 

@Petu--  You read the entire thing and survived?  I only know of one other besides you and myself that made it clear through.  Last count it was 87 pages and over 1500 posts.  It still amazes me how much response I got to it, especially the number of views 119,387 something.  I guess I was just too close to it, but it didn't seem all that interesting.  The taper is still going well, I have a week and a half to go on this hold period and then start another slide ending at 2.1mg.  If everything goes well I should be jumping off sometime next summer.

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Hi BrassMonkey,

 

Nice to see you here, I was Gemini_girl from pp.

 

You helped me a lot so wanted to say hi!!

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Geminigirl-- Glad I could help and it's nice to see both of you (one for each post) lol  I really am glad you made it over.

 

OOH OOH  OOW OUCH!!!!!  Broke a tooth.  Took a big hunk out of my upper left back molar with a piece of cheese. Darn WD, if it's not one symptom it's another. lol   Break out the oragel I can't see the dentist until tomorrow. 

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hehe ya....

 

Do you like my new pic?

 

It's a funny cat...

 

Oh no, hope you fix ur tooth!

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Tom my old buddy my old mate ... feeling right at home now that you are here.

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Funny (strange) thing - I recently broke two of my teeth - chewing on nuts.  Guess that says something about me :unsure:

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A piece of cheese? Must have been really stale! LOL. Man, I chew on ice all the time (darn anemia) now you've got me worried. :blink: I can't afford the dentist!

 

Hope they can get you in early, I know that's gotta hurt. :(

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Hi Brass, I found you guys!  Aberdeen, Songbird too!  I lost my support community and am so thankful you're here!  Can someone PM me what happened?

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Finally made it to the dentist on Friday.  In and out in ten minutes.  Yep you have a broken tooth, here take these pills, we will call you later this afternoon with an appointment with a specialist to do a root canal.  So here it is 11:30 Saturday night and I still haven't heard back about the appointment and the pills don't do a whole lot of good.  Actually I've had teeth hurt a lot more than this, but it wears you down and I rather pissed about the short shrift and lack of follow up.  Monicas neck and stomach have been really playing up for the past couple of weeks and the helplessness of watching her in pain always causes me great stress. (For all you SAers Monica is my wife of 36 years and the definition of soul mate.)   I am surprised that the WDs have pretty well left me alone the last couple of days.  I'm not feeling great, but my head has been clear enough to take charge and make things happen with getting her to her doctors appointments, getting her meds and such while also getting my own stuff handled.  I have been very tired and achy but that is pretty normal right now.  I have noticed that the tinnitus has been spiking on and off a lot more, more than likely the added stress of the past week.

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As always, a good read. So pleased I found all you guys again, I'm sure I went through a period of grieving for you all when pp shut. So excited to see so many familiar names.

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Hi Brassmonkey, great to have you here. I love your brassmonkey sliding taper it sounds like a 

good way to taper and I'm glad it's worked well for you and others.  :)

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Thanks mammaP,  it all came out of being scared of the symptoms I had read about.  I was in a really bad place and didn't want to risk it getting any worse.  I hope more people will try it, I think it would really help them.

 

Started the third week or my current hold.  Things have been changing enough that I can't really set a baseline of WDnormal.  Currently I feel like I have slipped backward a bit in the feeling like c*** department.  The brain fog has been pretty consistent for a while now, when I am rested it isn't as bad, but when I get tired it really make itself known and I seem to be tired a lot lately.  I'm sleeping pretty well and feel fairly rested in the morning, but by afternoon I'm done in.  The tinnitus has calmed back down which is nice.  At least I don't have the pain in my hands right now they just have no strength and are totally uncoordinated.

 

Ended up calling the dentist to get my root canal referral, they made it up while I was on the phone, then I had to make all the arrangements.  I get to wait until next Tuesday, the soonest they could get me in.  In the meantime more pills.  At least I seem to be tolerating them so far.

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Arrrgghhhh toothache and stuff is the pits.  Root canals are ok, it's just hard keeping your mouth open all the time.  Gets sore after a while.

As you said, at least you are tolerating the pills.  Hope it doens't cause too much trouble over Christma.

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Toothache, pills, Monica crook, stress.....  no wonder you aren't feeling the best Tom.   Hang in there.  xx

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I swear these meds affect teeth too. I never had probs before paxil and in the last 8 years I had 4 root canals, maybe 5 I'm not sure. Seems my teeth got weaker.

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Me too DLB!  It's the craziest thing.

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I wouldn't put it past it, they seem to effect just about everything.  Right now especially me.  Had a really nice meltdown last night.  First in some time, I think I was in the 6-5mg range for the last one.  That range was not fun.  So my tooth started hurting right after I went to bed and I started thinking about how I had to call the dentist in the morning to get an extension on the pain meds and that got me thinking about the crappy way he had treated me during the consult and that got me up into my head (which is not a safe place to be) which then let loose some of the anger I have been suppressing about all the s*** from the past ten years what with the poopout, updose, more poopout, alcohol trouble, pain etc., etc. all because of the stupid pills and the medical community. (I think I just wrote a prime example of a run on sentence)  I've been holding in the main anger, because uncontrolled it can get really ugly and I never want to go back there again, and trying to dispel it a little at a time as I have the mental strength to cope with it.  So much for that idea, I didn't get violent angry but I was sure upset for a while.  Before things got too out of control I got up and went out and talked to my rock, Monica.  She has been so wonderful through this whole mess. After some emotional talking and such I was able to get a lot of it out and clamed down enough to sleep.  Today I'm just suffering the emotional "hangover" and not enough sleep.  The dentist did give me an extension with no problem, but I still don't trust him or any doctor.

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I am so sorry about your tooth/pain. It is so understandable that you would be angry as you have dealt with a lot - all because of medication that was supposed to help. I think it is good to have the anger directed outward. I often get mad at myself for taking these meds. in the first place. I am so glad you have Monica to talk to - it sounds like you have a wonderful relationship. I hope you are feeling better very soon!

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Teeth problems are the worst!  I've had at least 8 root canals, maybe more.  I've lost count.  I can't remember if any of them were before Paxil, but I've always had rotten teeth so I'm not blaming it.  I guess I've been lucky in the sense that whenever I was in enough pain to need a root canal, I could always get in FAST.  I hope you are feeling better.

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Well my views of the medical industry have been reinforced yet again.  I spoke with the dentists office this morning and they approved the new prescription and were going to phone it in for me.  Guess what wasn't waiting for me when I got there this evening, the pharmacy had no records of it at all.  Once I am done dealing with this round of treatments the insurance company is going to get an ear full.

 

I've had seven or eight root canal over the years and they haven't been all that bad, considering.  My problem stems from the eight or nine fillings I had as a kid, with out the help of Novocaine.  The arms of the dentists chair were never the same afterwards, and neither was I.  There are some things that you just can never forgive your parents for.

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So sorry Tom. :(

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Dental work is the worst! I can't believe you are having to wait! I too share a strong dislike (read terror) of the dentist. I had a tooth pulled and it about killed me. Hang in there. Would getting it pulled be quicker/cheaper/easier?

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My problem stems from the eight or nine fillings I had as a kid, with out the help of Novocaine.

 

When I was a kid we never got injections when we got fillings from the dental nurse at the "murder house" (school dental clinic).  Then as a young adult I used to forgo the injections as I didn't like them, I just put up with feeling the drill.  So far I've managed to avoid any root canals.  I didn't go to the dentist for about 12 years, and was expecting some when I finally went.  I had a couple of borderline teeth, but in the end just had to have four fillings.  My dentist is very nice and it was all straightforward. 

 

Sorry to hear you are having so many problems, all the other issues you've had on top of the actual teeth problems would multiply the stress.  Is there any way you could just have a big cry instead of getting angry?  That usually helps me, I'm a big cryer these days!  (Oh, I need the "big cry" emoticon we used to have).

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Hello BM,

Sorry to hear about your dental issues. I myself have some work scheduled and am not looking forward to it.

wishing you luck,

Tgirl

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MERRY CHRISTMAS BRASS MONKEY! Hope the dental issues have calmed a bit.

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I wouldn't put it past it, they seem to effect just about everything.  Right now especially me.  Had a really nice meltdown last night.  First in some time, I think I was in the 6-5mg range for the last one.  That range was not fun.  So my tooth started hurting right after I went to bed and I started thinking about how I had to call the dentist in the morning to get an extension on the pain meds and that got me thinking about the crappy way he had treated me during the consult and that got me up into my head (which is not a safe place to be) which then let loose some of the anger I have been suppressing about all the s*** from the past ten years what with the poopout, updose, more poopout, alcohol trouble, pain etc., etc. all because of the stupid pills and the medical community. (I think I just wrote a prime example of a run on sentence)  I've been holding in the main anger, because uncontrolled it can get really ugly and I never want to go back there again, and trying to dispel it a little at a time as I have the mental strength to cope with it.  So much for that idea, I didn't get violent angry but I was sure upset for a while.  Before things got too out of control I got up and went out and talked to my rock, Monica.  She has been so wonderful through this whole mess. After some emotional talking and such I was able to get a lot of it out and clamed down enough to sleep.  Today I'm just suffering the emotional "hangover" and not enough sleep.  The dentist did give me an extension with no problem, but I still don't trust him or any doctor.

I need a rock Monica... hello Brassmonky welcome I think I was at pp when you were there...long ago. 

 

Is Monica a rock or a person you call your rock... may be a stupid question likely is... I will assume Monica is your wife tho I may try a pet rock can't hurt. 

 

10 years of anger I can identify with that... a lot to drag around every day I wonder how much that has to do with things.  It has to be affecting all of us how could it now?  

 

I think withdrawal does affect our teeth I know it affects calcium may be related to that.... teeth have been some of my worst sources of pain... anger ect... as for root canals I had a ton since I started wd... and almost all of them have had to be pulled since.. a few more to pull and I may just feel better... may sound like a crazy thought but I will never again have a root canal if I break any more teeth they are getting pulled out I am done with root canals. I have a few teeth now that are always abscessed and the xray shows nothing wrong with them... so they will not pull them even tho they hurt like he double hockey sticks... so no treatment.  One has a lump on the side that one they pulled it practically fell out. 

If you were to ask me I know you didn't but if you were I would say pull it. but that is just me and my extreme situation with teeth ...pain dentists and crap. 

 

Withdrawal normal sounds like an oxymoron to me... I can't decide if I love it or hate it... but it is one of them. 

 

I hope the pain pills don't affect your taper and or self... and that you have a peaceful holiday... 

peace

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Is Monica a rock or a person you call your rock... may be a stupid question likely is...I will assume Monica is your wife tho I may try a pet rock can't hurt.

 

:lol:  LOL, Monica the pet rock!

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Monica is my wonderful wife of 36 some years.  I call her my rock at times like this because she is so steady to hang on to.  It is a role that switches as need be I've supported her through a lot too.  I just told her about several of asking if she would be your rock and she got all mushy and teary eyed.  

Actually I did let the anger out in the form of a good cry, very cathartic.   As long as I keep up with the pain pills (Tylanol #3) the tooth is pretty much under control and codeine has never bothered me.  I was on Vicodin for 18 months during my Seven Years of Pain and was able to quit in  a week with no problems. Thank you all for the support it really helps. 

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Hi brass monkey! Good to see you here. I was Jupiter on paxil progress. I didn't post there much but you were very kind to me on there. Welcome!

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Monica is my wonderful wife of 36 some years.  I call her my rock at times like this because she is so steady to hang on to.  It is a role that switches as need be I've supported her through a lot too.  I just told her about several of asking if she would be your rock and she got all mushy and teary eyed.  

Actually I did let the anger out in the form of a good cry, very cathartic.   As long as I keep up with the pain pills (Tylanol #3) the tooth is pretty much under control and codeine has never bothered me.  I was on Vicodin for 18 months during my Seven Years of Pain and was able to quit in  a week with no problems. Thank you all for the support it really helps. 

Sorry I did not meant to joke about your wonderful wife your very lucky to have each other.  I really did think it was a rock then went back and read it again... just let it sit... after that. 

Can I ask about your 7 years of pain... was it wd related... I have a lot of pain.  Hope the tooth is fixed soon. 

peace

 

ps I do get something like brain fog intermittently it is more like stupid fog...tho

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Hey Brass, Merry Christmas. Hopefully the tooth dilemma ends soon. I have been lucky not to have any issues in wd with my teeth I guess! Gearing up for my next drop. How about you?

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btdt-- we have to maintain our sense of humor through this entire mess, Monica and I both got a good chuckle out of it.  I, for one, love finding the absurd/obscure humor in peoples statements.

 

Many years ago, back when I was more bull headed than I am now, I wasn't feeling well and had stomach pains.  Even though the ultrasounds and x-rays showed nothing the doctor said you have gall stones and the gall bladder needs to come out.  Not being a trusting soul and not being shown any evidence, I blew him off.  About six months later the pain had grown to the point I couldn't take it any more and I went to the ER.  Next day they removed three pounds of gangrenous gall bladder.  To help clean up the internal mess they installed a stomach drain.  A week or so later, removing the drain caused a surgical clip to come off of what was left of the bile duct.  This resulted in a massive case of paritinitious  (sp), which required a second surgery to clean up.  It also caused 45 adhesions between the stomach muscles and the guts.  It took 18 months of intense pain for this to get figured out, including a case of pancrititius  (sp). Which is the most painful and disgusting thing I have ever been through.  A third surgery released the adhesions and I was able to start recovering.  It wasn't for another five years that I actually started feeling descent.  Now, 20 some years later, I still have occasional trouble with the area around the scar.  During those seven years I was a very angery and sensitive person which lead to my introduction to a new wonder drug called Paxil.  But that is another story.  I often tell people that ADWD will be the hardest thing they ever do in your life.  For me it was my Seven Years of Pain, which has made my WD experience a relative walk in the park.  

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