After my last post, I had a little window which was about a day, maybe 2 then the insomnia was full on again. The dizziness and nausea were back along with it. If only I could crack the insomnia life would be much better, or maybe I am putting too much on it and life would be no different! A couple of weeks back I bought some night nurse, its for flu symptoms and had an anti histamine, decongestant and paracetamol. I remember having it many years ago and it knocked me out so in desperation I bought a bottle. I didn't touch it for days because I was scared in case of reaction but eventually took a quarter dose. It didnt help with anything until the next morning when I became hungover and slept for 3 hours! All next day was fuzzy and hungover so I haven't tried it since. The dizziness got better though so maybe it was in my ears after all, I also did some exercises that help clear the eustachion tubes and something worked because it has been much better since. Still very little sleep though and I dont know how long I can go on like this.
I went for my appointment with the consultant and decided to go for the knee op after he showed me my x rays and explained everything again. I then had my pre op assessment straight after I saw him, and got my date for 15 June. When I got home I was exhausted and in pain everywhere so started to doubt my decision.
He doesn't have my records so doesn't know that my spine is also arthritic, neck, shoulders, hands and feet too.I still feel ok in my head which is great, but completely exhausted and in pain most of the time. My son and grandaughter have been with me this weekend and we went out for lunch yesterday. I couldn't settle last night for the pain and have been tired and sore all day today. I had all these plans for when I was off the drugs. Right now I dont feel much withdrawal, but feel physically ill. Utterly exhausted and in pain. When I was at the hospital I had my pre op checks and the nurse said that I was very fit and healthy because of the check boxes for diabetes, asthma etc were clear and ecg, bp tests were normal. I should feel better but feel like I'm overwhelmed. I keep thinking that I dont know why it is like this but really I do. 22 years of polydrugging cant be undone just like that, it;s going to take a long time and being off the effexor is the start. Then there is still the tramadol, just a low dose but we all know that even low doses are detrimental.
Enough now, I'm going to stop whining and be positive, I've been well enough to go out with my family and it has been great having them here. So it has cost me in terms of energy and pain but no pain no gain! It is better than before, and tomorrow my son goes home. Then I can recover before the wee boys are back to visit grandma. My glass is half full, my glass is half full, rinse and repeat!