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Hobbies


alexjuice

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My therapist recommended I look for a hobby. This sounds liek a good idea only I don't know what I like, frankly. I also struggle with energy and motivation sometimes and also am physically limited in some ways.

 

I read an account of a depressed individual who walked the aisles of Hobby Lobby looking for some craft or activity to steal the attention from her emotional despair. Maybe I should walk the hobby store and see what appeals to me.

 

It's crazy that I will be 35 yrs old next week and I don't know my own likes. I used to like sports and politics and drinking but I feel empty thinking about those sorts of things. I'd like to do something myself like maybe play cards or ... I don't know, do something not watch other people do stuff.

 

What are your hobbies? If you are too sick to engage in your hobbies what did they used to be? Do you still like the idea of them or do you think that your old hobbies were part of depression or low energy or whatever. In my case I used sports and media to escape and preoccupy my mind bc my own life was unfulfilling. Obviously alcohol. I need something better now. I am thinking about church group but I have no idea how to get involved. Or also maybe to visit some of the outdoor parks here in central texas. I don;t know.

 

What are your hobbies?

"Well my ship's been split to splinters and it's sinking fast
I'm drowning in the poison, got no future, got no past
But my heart is not weary, it's light and it's free
I've got nothing but affection for all those who sailed with me.

Everybody's moving, if they ain't already there
Everybody's got to move somewhere
Stick with me baby, stick with me anyhow
Things should start to get interesting right about now."

- Zimmerman

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Hey Alex,

 

When I first started seeing a psych doc she suggested I do something creative. I had no idea what to do.  So, I went to the hobby store and bought some wooden Christmas ornaments that came with the paint so that I could hand paint them.  It was so much fun that I bought another set.  I used those ornaments for years until I got married and my husband didn't like them :P .  I gave them away.  But there was no pressure for the pieces to be artwork and that is what was fun about it.  Plus the paint had glitter in it :lol: .

 

I also tried arranging silk flowers.  The arrangements were pleasing to me and I still have a few of them.

 

I've also done paint by numbers and found that quite enjoyable.  There have even been times when I actually painted with oil paints and did my own art work.  Several of them turned out very nicely.  Several years ago I started knitting and made quite a few caps.  I started knitting a scarf about 3 years ago and haven't finished it :blush: .  My friends who knit tell me I need to start another project and give the original scarf up.

 

One of my favorite hobbies is writing, but I don't do it much these days.  I seem to have too much judgement around my writing.  I hope that passes some day. 

 

I tried making candles, but that didn't seem like fun.  I did bead work to create my own jewelry, but lost interest in that.

 

I tried to learn to draw and have had limited success with that.  I used to do pottery (back when I was single).  There is something very therapeutic about squishing clay through your hands. 

 

My most favorite all time hobby was dancing.  I used to take dancing several times a week.  It was a great workout and it was a form of meditation for me. 

 

One thing that I found fun was to go through magazines and find pictures that I liked.  Might be a picture of Mexican pottery or a log mantel over a fireplace ... could be a picture of someone doing something I wanted to do like ice skating or dancing.  I cut out photos that I liked or that represented something I wanted in my life.  Then I bought a large foam core poster board, some rubber cement, and made a collage or dream board with the pictures.  A couple of these dream boards have basically been realized.  But whether you just do it to figure out what you like or to visualize your dream, it is low tech and can be a fun form of self-discovery.

 

Last, but certainly not least, since I live in a beautiful place, I enjoy getting out in nature and hiking, ice skating, or even downhill skiing or cross-country skiing on occasion. 

 

Now I need to pick up one of my old hobbies and get creative!  Thanks for starting the thread, Alex!

 

Karma

 

 

2007 @ 375 mg Effexor - 11/29/2011 - 43.75 mg Effexor (regular) & .625 mg Xanax

200 mg Gabapentin 2/27/21 - 194.5 mg, 5/28/21 - 183 mg, 8/2/21 - 170 mg, 11/28/21 - 150 mg, 4/19/22 - 122 mg; 8//7/22 - 100 mg; 12/17 - 75mg; 8/17 - 45 mg; 10/16 40 mg
Xanax taper: 3/11/12 - 0.9375 mg, 3/25/12 - 0.875 mg, 4/6/12 - 0.8125 mg, 4/18/12 - 0.75 ; 10/16 40mg;

1/16 0.6875 mg; at some point 0.625 mg
Effexor taper: 1/29/12 - 40.625 mg, 4/29/12 - 39.875 mg, 5/11/12 - Switched to liquid Effexor, 5/25/12 - 38 mg, 7/6/12 - 35 mg, 8/17/12 - 32 mg, 9/14/12 - 30 mg, 10/19/12 - 28 mg, 11/9/12 - 26 mg, 11/30/12 - 24 mg, 01/14/13 - 22 mg. 02/25/13 - 20.8 mg, 03/18/13 - 19.2 mg, 4/15/13 - 17.6 mg, 8/10/13 - 16.4 mg, 9/7/13 - 15.2 mg, 10/19/13 - 14 mg, 1/15/14 - 13.2 mg, 3/1/2014 - 12.6 mg, 5/4/14 - 12 mg, 8/1/14 - 11.4 mg, 8/29/14 - 10.8 mg; 10/14/14 - 10.2 mg; 12/15/14 - 10 mg, 1/11/15 - 9.5 mg, 2/8/15 - 9 mg, 3/21/15 - 8.5 mg, 5/1/15 - 8 mg, 6/9/15 - 7.5 mg, 7/8/15 - 7 mg, 8/22/15 - 6.5 mg, 10/4/15 - 6 mg; 1/1/16 - 5.6 mg; 2/6/16 - 5.2 mg; 4/9 - 4.8 mg; 7/7 4.5 mg; 10/7 4.25 mg; 11/4 4.0 mg; 11/25 3.8 mg; 4/24 3.6 mg; 5/27 3.4 mg; 7/8 3.2 mg ... 10/18 2.8 mg; 1/18 2.6 mg; 4/7 2.4 mg; 5/26 2.15mg; 8/18 1.85 mg; 10/7 1.7 mg; 12/1 1.45 mg; 3/2 1.2 mg; 5/4 0.90 mg; 6/1 0.80 mg; 6/22 0.65 mg; 08/03 0.50 mg, 08/10 0.45 mg, 10/05 0.325 mg, 11/23 0.2 mg, 12/14 0.15 mg, 12/21 0.125 mg, 02/28 0.03125 mg, 2/15 0.015625 mg, 2/29/20 0.00 mg - OFF Effexor


I am not a medical professional - this is not medical advice. My suggestions are based on personal experience, reading, observation and anecdotal information posted by other sufferers

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Alex- I feel the same way.

 

Before all this mess, I was really into exercise. I loved to run 3-5 days a week. I also, for a time, did weights. 

 

The thought of trying all that again is tiring. 

 

I struggle with not knowing what I like. I feel like I don't like much. There really isn't anything I'm passionate about right now......Well other than trying to get better. It's all consuming and doesn't leave room for much else.

 

I'll be 34 in Mar.

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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I've dabbled in many crafts and have stuff for all of them. I used to sew a lot, made a lot of the family's clothes.

Then lots of 'little' hobbies and finally making jewellery. I was good at that and made lots, sold some but gave

away most. Then effexor pooped out and I've done nothing for years. My grandson came a few days ago and

took out some beads to make a necklace for his girlfriend. They are still strewn all over the dining table and I've

been stroking them. There's something about fondling beads, they are so tactile and calming.  Now I've read this 

they are calling for me to make something gorgeous but first I must organise them so I can find what I'm looking for!

 

How about photography Alex? It can be anything at all. I read about a man who  put his pictures.in a gallery

They were amazing, beautiful photos but every single one ( and there were hundreds) was taken in or around his

garden shed! Close ups of everything from plant pots to spider webs because he never went out anywhere.

It was fascinating seeing so many views of something so ordinary.  :)

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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Something creative is probably a good bet. I'm inclined to want to work on the computer but getting out and about would probably be best for me. Exercise is certainly worthwhile but I need to work up to it. I took a one hour walk tonight, it was a gentle walk, but it was too much. I need to stick to 30-45 minutes. I am definitely remembering that I used to be a night person and that was part of the problem. All of the stuff I remember liking all happens after business hrs...

 

I'm also bummed that the good weather is basically gone. I'm becoming much more of an outdoors person. Sunshine has never felt so important to me!

"Well my ship's been split to splinters and it's sinking fast
I'm drowning in the poison, got no future, got no past
But my heart is not weary, it's light and it's free
I've got nothing but affection for all those who sailed with me.

Everybody's moving, if they ain't already there
Everybody's got to move somewhere
Stick with me baby, stick with me anyhow
Things should start to get interesting right about now."

- Zimmerman

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I look at people all the time and think, wow they are doing something they love with a great deal of passion.  I have a friend who became a bodybuilder.  She competes.  I have another friend who teaches meditation and another one who opened up and teaches Pilates.

 

Maybe comparing is not a good thing.  I do have a passion for refurbishing things.  I don't have the space to pursue it unless it is on a small scale.

 

I used to run and did enter races.  And then I powered 'down' to walking and entered races.  This may be a marvelous outlet for me once again.  With cleaning and organizing and pet sitting, when I get home, I don't feel like power walking......

 

Some people read.....

 

I really believe it is an important thing to have a hobby for me anyway......need to address this and  thank you for bringing it up.

I think about it alot, particularly after going on FB and seeing what others are doing...

Intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1902-nikki-hi-my-rundown-with-ads/

 

Paxil 1997-2004

Crossed over to Lexapro Paxil not available

at Pharmacies GSK halted deliveries

Lexapro 40mgs

Lexapro taper (2years)

Imipramine

Imipramine and Celexa

Now Nefazadone/Imipramine 50mgs. each

45mgs. Serzone  50mgs. Imipramine

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Thanks for the topic and all the ideas people are posting. I, too, used to do a lot of things. When I look back I can see how things just slipped away, one after the other. Meds suck.

 

I used to scrapbook and I still have all the supplies. I'm two-years behind in my books and I already have the photos printed. I have no excuse for not doing them. I went so far as to pull everything out about 2-weeks ago. Last week I put it back in the closet. Too overwhelming for right now.

 

I used to take photos. 3-years ago I switched from 35mm to digital because my hands shake so much.  When my vision was damaged from Lithium toxicity I stopped taking pics. That said, I own a digital camera. I can take a million pics until I hit on the good ones. I own tripods and I can see but I use shaky hands and poor vision as excuses. I have noticed that I have been using my cell phone tho so photography might come back out. 

 

I've let many of my shamanic rituals fall to the side. I miss those but never seem to want to do anything about it. They are really involved and complicated. 

 

I used to teach meditation, yoga, and reiki. Not interested in any of them tho I make myself do them from time to time. I complain about how much I don't like them while I am doing them and then I get pissy because I feel better after. Feeling better lasts longer than pissy. 

 

I used to travel. Ran out of money. Happens :/

 

I used to have more friends. That one hurts. A lot. 

 

I do like sitting in my car and reading. The cold weather puts a spin on that and I am going to need to be creative and not just give it up for winter. I'll still read, love reading. 

 

Last year I went snow shoeing once and I liked it. In my head I am planning on buying shoes and poles. Hopefully I'll stick with that idea. I am a sun worshiper.

 

I'm noticing that I have interests in very solitary things. I think I would like to do some work on that and get around people more. Maybe. That's overwhelming right now. I have this feeling like there is something out there that I am really going to be interested in and I just haven't found my passion yet. I'm 45, it can show up any day now :) Luckily I drive my son to/from school so I am sort of "forced" to get up, get dressed, and leave the house twice a day regardless of my level of motivation. I usually find that I have more energy right after both of those trips. Object in motion stays in motion.

 
I do like reading what other people have done/do. It gives me ideas. 

Current:

Lorazapam2mg: 4/9/152mg - 1.5mg: already sick/nothing noticed. No changes in sleep noted after illness.  

Lamictal: 7/27/13 - 8/6/13: 400mg - 500mg(dr order) mouth sores, headache, cognitive/balance, heart palp...8/7/13 - 8/23/13: 500mg - 400mg; symptoms↓...10/10/13: 350mg; fever/flu-like <2-weeks...12/30/13: 325mg; fever/flu-like symptoms <1-week...2/10/17: 300mg; no significant changes noted. 

 

Discontinued:

Omeprazole: 09/2103 40mg...5/1/14: 20mg... 8/21/14 = 0

Wellbutrin: 11/22/13: 300mg – 225mg...12/6/13 delayed reaction- mood swings, weight↓, heart palp/chest pain, alerting...12/14/13: 187mg; physical symptoms↓, neuro emotions ↑, weight stable...12/20/13: 225mg; physical symptoms return, emotions stable <1-week, weight↓...4/21/14: 187mg; weight↑...5/17/14 (neurologist ordered discontinue asap):168mg; headache, mood swings, ↑weight, sleep flux...5/24/14: 150mg; headache, mood swings, ↓cognitive/balance...6/2/14: 112mg; see above, weight stable, <3-weeks... 6/28/14: 100mg; moody...7/25/14: 87.5mg; family troubles... 8/4/14: 75mg; headaches; moody... 8/9/1450mg headaches... 8/12/14: 37.5mg; 8/17/14: 25mg...8/26/14 = 0

Hydroxyzine; 10mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. Mood changes/rage 

Buspirone: 7.5mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. No changes.

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Mattingsmom,

 

I'm curious about why you read in your car. Sounds like something I would do, in the past, at least.

 

Alex,

 

I'm not a crafty/hobby person. Never have been. I'm not at all domestic... rarely cook or do anything indoors aside from read before bed. I've always been an outdoors person, but not any sports until I got my horses. Most of what ive done since losing my work in 2001 has been horse-related: courses, camping, advocacy for abused horses..

 

For many years, I enjoyed visiting new home models and open.houses for ideas. After we lost our house and huge chunk of money in the crash, I couldn't do that anymore (emotionally).

 

Travel has always been important, mostly domestic, but several trips to Hawaii and the Caribbean. I love to explore and have spent many days (months!) driving around Southern California and across the country. I haven't been abroad, but feel very fortunate to have travelled to some wonderful tropical places.

Pristiq tapered over 8 months ending Spring 2011 after 18 years of polydrugging that began w/Zoloft for fatigue/general malaise (not mood). CURRENT: 1mg Klonopin qhs (SSRI bruxism), 75mg trazodone qhs, various hormonesLitigation for 11 years for Work-related injury, settled 2004. Involuntary medical retirement in 2001 (age 39). 2012 - brain MRI showing diffuse, chronic cerebrovascular damage/demyelination possibly vasculitis/cerebritis. Dx w/autoimmune polyendocrine failure.<p>2013 - Dx w/CNS Sjogren's Lupus (FANA antibodies first appeared in 1997 but missed by doc).

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I like to read in the car sometimes too Mattinsmum, don't do it very often but I like to park by the beach so I'm looking out to sea

and read, In winter I've taken a flask of coffee with me and spent an hour or so there. Not done that for ages but now you've

reminded me I'll put it on my to do list.

 

I saw my cbt therapist today and we made a list of achievable goals. She asked about things I used to like doing. On my list is

to go to the library, it's only next door but it's years since I went to look through the books. The museum is next door too, same

building and I've never been there so that's on the list too. I used to like photography, not very good at it but on the farm where

I used to live there was a lot of ancient farming stuff, ploughs etc and I liked to take pictures of them, kind of poignant ones,

redundant machinery crafted by hand left to rust away in favour of new tractors. And birds, I had a bird table right outside my 

bedroom window and would take photos of the birds. And at night watched the badgers on cctv. Oh I really miss that farm . 

 

I told her all this stuff and my goal sometime in the next 2 weeks is to go to the library, borrow some books, and sort my bead 

stash out. They are all in little plastic bags all over my table but I've been collecting cute glass jars and pots to put them in

so they can go on display instead of in a cupboard in bags. Hopefully once I start handling them something will trigger 

the motivation to create something. 

 

I am to allow myself 15 minutes each day to do something, anything that isn't related to housework or things that NEED to be

done, it has to be something I used to love and the aim is to try and get the creative part of me going again. 

It's worth a try! 

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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Mattingsmom,I'm curious about why you read in your car. Sounds like something I would do, in the past, at least.Alex,I'm not a crafty/hobby person. Never have been. I'm not at all domestic... rarely cook or do anything indoors aside from read before bed. I've always been an outdoors person, but not any sports until I got my horses. Most of what ive done since losing my work in 2001 has been horse-related: courses, camping, advocacy for abused horses..For many years, I enjoyed visiting new home models and open.houses for ideas. After we lost our house and huge chunk of money in the crash, I couldn't do that anymore (emotionally).Travel has always been important, mostly domestic, but several trips to Hawaii and the Caribbean. I love to explore and have spent many days (months!) driving around Southern California and across the country. I haven't been abroad, but feel very fortunate to have travelled to some wonderful tropical places.

Reading in the car...I had a Jeep for years and while I was working on my masters I would drive up the mountain and sit for hours working on it. That started a habit. When my boys were younger and in different schools I had a 30-minute wait between dismissal times. I would bring my oldest home and then go sit and read at the middle school while waiting for the other. It was MY 30-minutes.  Also, I love to be outdoors but I am always cold. My car gets hot, stays hot, and lets me be out in the sun.

 

My car is also my refuge. I was homeless for awhile while I was a teen and having a vehicle, for me, means I will always have a "home". I owned the Jeep so it was something that no one could take from me. I had it for 10-years to the week. Last year it gave out, no one could find the problem, and I traded it for a used subaru. I have car payments again which I am not happy about. Paying it off as quickly as I can.  

 

And I have heated seats :)

Current:

Lorazapam2mg: 4/9/152mg - 1.5mg: already sick/nothing noticed. No changes in sleep noted after illness.  

Lamictal: 7/27/13 - 8/6/13: 400mg - 500mg(dr order) mouth sores, headache, cognitive/balance, heart palp...8/7/13 - 8/23/13: 500mg - 400mg; symptoms↓...10/10/13: 350mg; fever/flu-like <2-weeks...12/30/13: 325mg; fever/flu-like symptoms <1-week...2/10/17: 300mg; no significant changes noted. 

 

Discontinued:

Omeprazole: 09/2103 40mg...5/1/14: 20mg... 8/21/14 = 0

Wellbutrin: 11/22/13: 300mg – 225mg...12/6/13 delayed reaction- mood swings, weight↓, heart palp/chest pain, alerting...12/14/13: 187mg; physical symptoms↓, neuro emotions ↑, weight stable...12/20/13: 225mg; physical symptoms return, emotions stable <1-week, weight↓...4/21/14: 187mg; weight↑...5/17/14 (neurologist ordered discontinue asap):168mg; headache, mood swings, ↑weight, sleep flux...5/24/14: 150mg; headache, mood swings, ↓cognitive/balance...6/2/14: 112mg; see above, weight stable, <3-weeks... 6/28/14: 100mg; moody...7/25/14: 87.5mg; family troubles... 8/4/14: 75mg; headaches; moody... 8/9/1450mg headaches... 8/12/14: 37.5mg; 8/17/14: 25mg...8/26/14 = 0

Hydroxyzine; 10mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. Mood changes/rage 

Buspirone: 7.5mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. No changes.

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mommaP,

I'll go to my library in the next two-weeks and we can compare notes. What do think? Wanna give it a try?

Current:

Lorazapam2mg: 4/9/152mg - 1.5mg: already sick/nothing noticed. No changes in sleep noted after illness.  

Lamictal: 7/27/13 - 8/6/13: 400mg - 500mg(dr order) mouth sores, headache, cognitive/balance, heart palp...8/7/13 - 8/23/13: 500mg - 400mg; symptoms↓...10/10/13: 350mg; fever/flu-like <2-weeks...12/30/13: 325mg; fever/flu-like symptoms <1-week...2/10/17: 300mg; no significant changes noted. 

 

Discontinued:

Omeprazole: 09/2103 40mg...5/1/14: 20mg... 8/21/14 = 0

Wellbutrin: 11/22/13: 300mg – 225mg...12/6/13 delayed reaction- mood swings, weight↓, heart palp/chest pain, alerting...12/14/13: 187mg; physical symptoms↓, neuro emotions ↑, weight stable...12/20/13: 225mg; physical symptoms return, emotions stable <1-week, weight↓...4/21/14: 187mg; weight↑...5/17/14 (neurologist ordered discontinue asap):168mg; headache, mood swings, ↑weight, sleep flux...5/24/14: 150mg; headache, mood swings, ↓cognitive/balance...6/2/14: 112mg; see above, weight stable, <3-weeks... 6/28/14: 100mg; moody...7/25/14: 87.5mg; family troubles... 8/4/14: 75mg; headaches; moody... 8/9/1450mg headaches... 8/12/14: 37.5mg; 8/17/14: 25mg...8/26/14 = 0

Hydroxyzine; 10mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. Mood changes/rage 

Buspirone: 7.5mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. No changes.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

I was a very artsy-craftsy sort before Lexapro, but I think the anhedonia that comes in withdrawal has stifled my desire to do very much.  I used to paint, sew, do needlework of all sorts, make jewelry, cook, and on and on.  I'm hoping those interests will revive soon. I do still like to read, and thanks to a writers' group I joined last winter, I make the effort to do our monthly exercise which we present for critique.

 

For the time being I'm finding that doing things with other people helps me a lot.  I go to a weekly sewing group where I'm working on a piece of needlepoint, play cards once or twice a week with neighbors, and attend a board games Meetup group twice a month. I'm between churches but plan to try a new, quite interesting one soon.  They are involved in some local mission work (food pantry and homeless shelter) and also offer a Bible study once a week.

 

The important thing is to start. Just go ahead and try some things that interest you and keep going until you find some good fits. Look up Meetup online and also any churches that appeal to you.  As I said in my Intro thread, finding activities I like to do has been a lot like dating in that I've had to kiss quite a few toads to find the good guys.

Psychotropic drug history: Pristiq 50 mg. (mid-September 2010 through February 2011), Remeron (mid-September 2010 through January 2011), Lexapro 10 mg. (mid-February 2011 through mid-December 2011), Lorazepam (Ativan) 1 mg. as needed mid-September 2010 through early March 2012

"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." -Hanlon's Razor


Introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1588-introducing-jemima/

 

Success Story: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/6263-success-jemima-survives-lexapro-and-dr-dickhead-too/

Please note that I am not a medical professional and my advice is based on personal experience, reading, and anecdotal information posted by other sufferers.

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

mommaP,

I'll go to my library in the next two-weeks and we can compare notes. What do think? Wanna give it a try?

Ok you're on   :) . Not sure what I'm going to look for, will just browse the shelves and see what jumps out at me!

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

Link to comment

I used to sew years ago.  I loved it.  The best part was going to fabric store and picking out the pattern and fabric.

Intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1902-nikki-hi-my-rundown-with-ads/

 

Paxil 1997-2004

Crossed over to Lexapro Paxil not available

at Pharmacies GSK halted deliveries

Lexapro 40mgs

Lexapro taper (2years)

Imipramine

Imipramine and Celexa

Now Nefazadone/Imipramine 50mgs. each

45mgs. Serzone  50mgs. Imipramine

Link to comment

 

mommaP,

I'll go to my library in the next two-weeks and we can compare notes. What do think? Wanna give it a try?

Ok you're on   :) . Not sure what I'm going to look for, will just browse the shelves and see what jumps out at me!

 

Same here

Current:

Lorazapam2mg: 4/9/152mg - 1.5mg: already sick/nothing noticed. No changes in sleep noted after illness.  

Lamictal: 7/27/13 - 8/6/13: 400mg - 500mg(dr order) mouth sores, headache, cognitive/balance, heart palp...8/7/13 - 8/23/13: 500mg - 400mg; symptoms↓...10/10/13: 350mg; fever/flu-like <2-weeks...12/30/13: 325mg; fever/flu-like symptoms <1-week...2/10/17: 300mg; no significant changes noted. 

 

Discontinued:

Omeprazole: 09/2103 40mg...5/1/14: 20mg... 8/21/14 = 0

Wellbutrin: 11/22/13: 300mg – 225mg...12/6/13 delayed reaction- mood swings, weight↓, heart palp/chest pain, alerting...12/14/13: 187mg; physical symptoms↓, neuro emotions ↑, weight stable...12/20/13: 225mg; physical symptoms return, emotions stable <1-week, weight↓...4/21/14: 187mg; weight↑...5/17/14 (neurologist ordered discontinue asap):168mg; headache, mood swings, ↑weight, sleep flux...5/24/14: 150mg; headache, mood swings, ↓cognitive/balance...6/2/14: 112mg; see above, weight stable, <3-weeks... 6/28/14: 100mg; moody...7/25/14: 87.5mg; family troubles... 8/4/14: 75mg; headaches; moody... 8/9/1450mg headaches... 8/12/14: 37.5mg; 8/17/14: 25mg...8/26/14 = 0

Hydroxyzine; 10mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. Mood changes/rage 

Buspirone: 7.5mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. No changes.

Link to comment

Mattinsmom ~ I was certainly not expecting this when I asked about your car. I'm so sorry you went through that and especially at such a young age.

"My car is also my refuge. I was homeless for awhile while I was a teen and having a vehicle, for me, means I will always have a 'home'"

 

Jemima ~ I'm amazed at the progress you've made in establishing your retirement life just in the last few months. Kudos!

 

Add to my list: bookstores with coffee shops. I used to go to medical libraries at universities to browse the new journals, but now avoid that scene.

Pristiq tapered over 8 months ending Spring 2011 after 18 years of polydrugging that began w/Zoloft for fatigue/general malaise (not mood). CURRENT: 1mg Klonopin qhs (SSRI bruxism), 75mg trazodone qhs, various hormonesLitigation for 11 years for Work-related injury, settled 2004. Involuntary medical retirement in 2001 (age 39). 2012 - brain MRI showing diffuse, chronic cerebrovascular damage/demyelination possibly vasculitis/cerebritis. Dx w/autoimmune polyendocrine failure.<p>2013 - Dx w/CNS Sjogren's Lupus (FANA antibodies first appeared in 1997 but missed by doc).

Link to comment

Barb...you hit on something that I dream about.....I think often about owning a thrift shop with a coffee bar.  I love to refinish things and I thought about refurbishing and selling furniture.  Love coffee too.  And then I think.....rent is a fortune.  Downer.

 

Remember Ellen DeGeneres original show "Buy The Book"?  She owned a book store with a coffee shop:)

Intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1902-nikki-hi-my-rundown-with-ads/

 

Paxil 1997-2004

Crossed over to Lexapro Paxil not available

at Pharmacies GSK halted deliveries

Lexapro 40mgs

Lexapro taper (2years)

Imipramine

Imipramine and Celexa

Now Nefazadone/Imipramine 50mgs. each

45mgs. Serzone  50mgs. Imipramine

Link to comment

Mattinsmom ~ I was certainly not expecting this when I asked about your car. I'm so sorry you went through that and especially at such a young age."My car is also my refuge. I was homeless for awhile while I was a teen and having a vehicle, for me, means I will always have a 'home'"Jemima ~ I'm amazed at the progress you've made in establishing your retirement life just in the last few months. Kudos!Add to my list: bookstores with coffee shops. I used to go to medical libraries at universities to browse the new journals, but now avoid that scene.

I'm sorry for just dropping that tidbit on you. My growing up stuff isn't big to me anymore and I forget that it might be shocking to other people when there is no warning that its coming. I try to be aware of that bomb dropping thing. Oops :/

Current:

Lorazapam2mg: 4/9/152mg - 1.5mg: already sick/nothing noticed. No changes in sleep noted after illness.  

Lamictal: 7/27/13 - 8/6/13: 400mg - 500mg(dr order) mouth sores, headache, cognitive/balance, heart palp...8/7/13 - 8/23/13: 500mg - 400mg; symptoms↓...10/10/13: 350mg; fever/flu-like <2-weeks...12/30/13: 325mg; fever/flu-like symptoms <1-week...2/10/17: 300mg; no significant changes noted. 

 

Discontinued:

Omeprazole: 09/2103 40mg...5/1/14: 20mg... 8/21/14 = 0

Wellbutrin: 11/22/13: 300mg – 225mg...12/6/13 delayed reaction- mood swings, weight↓, heart palp/chest pain, alerting...12/14/13: 187mg; physical symptoms↓, neuro emotions ↑, weight stable...12/20/13: 225mg; physical symptoms return, emotions stable <1-week, weight↓...4/21/14: 187mg; weight↑...5/17/14 (neurologist ordered discontinue asap):168mg; headache, mood swings, ↑weight, sleep flux...5/24/14: 150mg; headache, mood swings, ↓cognitive/balance...6/2/14: 112mg; see above, weight stable, <3-weeks... 6/28/14: 100mg; moody...7/25/14: 87.5mg; family troubles... 8/4/14: 75mg; headaches; moody... 8/9/1450mg headaches... 8/12/14: 37.5mg; 8/17/14: 25mg...8/26/14 = 0

Hydroxyzine; 10mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. Mood changes/rage 

Buspirone: 7.5mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. No changes.

Link to comment
  • Administrator

...

 

I am to allow myself 15 minutes each day to do something, anything that isn't related to housework or things that NEED to be

done, it has to be something I used to love and the aim is to try and get the creative part of me going again. 

It's worth a try! 

 

This is a great idea! I think I'm going to try and implement this, too.  I am very disciplined, which is great if you have something challenging to do and have to keep at it until it gets done.  But it stifles creativity. 

 

Alex, this is a great thread.  I hope it is inspiring you, it is sure inspiring others :D .

 

Karma

2007 @ 375 mg Effexor - 11/29/2011 - 43.75 mg Effexor (regular) & .625 mg Xanax

200 mg Gabapentin 2/27/21 - 194.5 mg, 5/28/21 - 183 mg, 8/2/21 - 170 mg, 11/28/21 - 150 mg, 4/19/22 - 122 mg; 8//7/22 - 100 mg; 12/17 - 75mg; 8/17 - 45 mg; 10/16 40 mg
Xanax taper: 3/11/12 - 0.9375 mg, 3/25/12 - 0.875 mg, 4/6/12 - 0.8125 mg, 4/18/12 - 0.75 ; 10/16 40mg;

1/16 0.6875 mg; at some point 0.625 mg
Effexor taper: 1/29/12 - 40.625 mg, 4/29/12 - 39.875 mg, 5/11/12 - Switched to liquid Effexor, 5/25/12 - 38 mg, 7/6/12 - 35 mg, 8/17/12 - 32 mg, 9/14/12 - 30 mg, 10/19/12 - 28 mg, 11/9/12 - 26 mg, 11/30/12 - 24 mg, 01/14/13 - 22 mg. 02/25/13 - 20.8 mg, 03/18/13 - 19.2 mg, 4/15/13 - 17.6 mg, 8/10/13 - 16.4 mg, 9/7/13 - 15.2 mg, 10/19/13 - 14 mg, 1/15/14 - 13.2 mg, 3/1/2014 - 12.6 mg, 5/4/14 - 12 mg, 8/1/14 - 11.4 mg, 8/29/14 - 10.8 mg; 10/14/14 - 10.2 mg; 12/15/14 - 10 mg, 1/11/15 - 9.5 mg, 2/8/15 - 9 mg, 3/21/15 - 8.5 mg, 5/1/15 - 8 mg, 6/9/15 - 7.5 mg, 7/8/15 - 7 mg, 8/22/15 - 6.5 mg, 10/4/15 - 6 mg; 1/1/16 - 5.6 mg; 2/6/16 - 5.2 mg; 4/9 - 4.8 mg; 7/7 4.5 mg; 10/7 4.25 mg; 11/4 4.0 mg; 11/25 3.8 mg; 4/24 3.6 mg; 5/27 3.4 mg; 7/8 3.2 mg ... 10/18 2.8 mg; 1/18 2.6 mg; 4/7 2.4 mg; 5/26 2.15mg; 8/18 1.85 mg; 10/7 1.7 mg; 12/1 1.45 mg; 3/2 1.2 mg; 5/4 0.90 mg; 6/1 0.80 mg; 6/22 0.65 mg; 08/03 0.50 mg, 08/10 0.45 mg, 10/05 0.325 mg, 11/23 0.2 mg, 12/14 0.15 mg, 12/21 0.125 mg, 02/28 0.03125 mg, 2/15 0.015625 mg, 2/29/20 0.00 mg - OFF Effexor


I am not a medical professional - this is not medical advice. My suggestions are based on personal experience, reading, observation and anecdotal information posted by other sufferers

Link to comment

I looked into acting and voice lessons a few years ago (prior to withdrawal) just for something to do. Both can help tap into layers of emotions. I was in theatre and choir in high school and college, but never did follow through more recently. I have done Toastmasters and various events involving public speaking.

Pristiq tapered over 8 months ending Spring 2011 after 18 years of polydrugging that began w/Zoloft for fatigue/general malaise (not mood). CURRENT: 1mg Klonopin qhs (SSRI bruxism), 75mg trazodone qhs, various hormonesLitigation for 11 years for Work-related injury, settled 2004. Involuntary medical retirement in 2001 (age 39). 2012 - brain MRI showing diffuse, chronic cerebrovascular damage/demyelination possibly vasculitis/cerebritis. Dx w/autoimmune polyendocrine failure.<p>2013 - Dx w/CNS Sjogren's Lupus (FANA antibodies first appeared in 1997 but missed by doc).

Link to comment

How do you do toastmasters and public speaking events? What do you present?

Current:

Lorazapam2mg: 4/9/152mg - 1.5mg: already sick/nothing noticed. No changes in sleep noted after illness.  

Lamictal: 7/27/13 - 8/6/13: 400mg - 500mg(dr order) mouth sores, headache, cognitive/balance, heart palp...8/7/13 - 8/23/13: 500mg - 400mg; symptoms↓...10/10/13: 350mg; fever/flu-like <2-weeks...12/30/13: 325mg; fever/flu-like symptoms <1-week...2/10/17: 300mg; no significant changes noted. 

 

Discontinued:

Omeprazole: 09/2103 40mg...5/1/14: 20mg... 8/21/14 = 0

Wellbutrin: 11/22/13: 300mg – 225mg...12/6/13 delayed reaction- mood swings, weight↓, heart palp/chest pain, alerting...12/14/13: 187mg; physical symptoms↓, neuro emotions ↑, weight stable...12/20/13: 225mg; physical symptoms return, emotions stable <1-week, weight↓...4/21/14: 187mg; weight↑...5/17/14 (neurologist ordered discontinue asap):168mg; headache, mood swings, ↑weight, sleep flux...5/24/14: 150mg; headache, mood swings, ↓cognitive/balance...6/2/14: 112mg; see above, weight stable, <3-weeks... 6/28/14: 100mg; moody...7/25/14: 87.5mg; family troubles... 8/4/14: 75mg; headaches; moody... 8/9/1450mg headaches... 8/12/14: 37.5mg; 8/17/14: 25mg...8/26/14 = 0

Hydroxyzine; 10mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. Mood changes/rage 

Buspirone: 7.5mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. No changes.

Link to comment

MM,

 

I did TM many years ago. As I recall, there were different ways topics were chosen and presented. Here's the link:

 

http://www.toastmasters.org/

 

I was in sales for many years and presentation to large groups was part of the job.

 

I also did several courses through a company called Communispond:

 

http://www.communispond.com/

 

I'm sure there are many similar programs.

Pristiq tapered over 8 months ending Spring 2011 after 18 years of polydrugging that began w/Zoloft for fatigue/general malaise (not mood). CURRENT: 1mg Klonopin qhs (SSRI bruxism), 75mg trazodone qhs, various hormonesLitigation for 11 years for Work-related injury, settled 2004. Involuntary medical retirement in 2001 (age 39). 2012 - brain MRI showing diffuse, chronic cerebrovascular damage/demyelination possibly vasculitis/cerebritis. Dx w/autoimmune polyendocrine failure.<p>2013 - Dx w/CNS Sjogren's Lupus (FANA antibodies first appeared in 1997 but missed by doc).

Link to comment

Thanks

Current:

Lorazapam2mg: 4/9/152mg - 1.5mg: already sick/nothing noticed. No changes in sleep noted after illness.  

Lamictal: 7/27/13 - 8/6/13: 400mg - 500mg(dr order) mouth sores, headache, cognitive/balance, heart palp...8/7/13 - 8/23/13: 500mg - 400mg; symptoms↓...10/10/13: 350mg; fever/flu-like <2-weeks...12/30/13: 325mg; fever/flu-like symptoms <1-week...2/10/17: 300mg; no significant changes noted. 

 

Discontinued:

Omeprazole: 09/2103 40mg...5/1/14: 20mg... 8/21/14 = 0

Wellbutrin: 11/22/13: 300mg – 225mg...12/6/13 delayed reaction- mood swings, weight↓, heart palp/chest pain, alerting...12/14/13: 187mg; physical symptoms↓, neuro emotions ↑, weight stable...12/20/13: 225mg; physical symptoms return, emotions stable <1-week, weight↓...4/21/14: 187mg; weight↑...5/17/14 (neurologist ordered discontinue asap):168mg; headache, mood swings, ↑weight, sleep flux...5/24/14: 150mg; headache, mood swings, ↓cognitive/balance...6/2/14: 112mg; see above, weight stable, <3-weeks... 6/28/14: 100mg; moody...7/25/14: 87.5mg; family troubles... 8/4/14: 75mg; headaches; moody... 8/9/1450mg headaches... 8/12/14: 37.5mg; 8/17/14: 25mg...8/26/14 = 0

Hydroxyzine; 10mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. Mood changes/rage 

Buspirone: 7.5mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. No changes.

Link to comment
  • 2 weeks later...

 

 

mommaP,

I'll go to my library in the next two-weeks and we can compare notes. What do think? Wanna give it a try?

Ok you're on   :) . Not sure what I'm going to look for, will just browse the shelves and see what jumps out at me!

 

Same here

 

I went to the library today. I picked up The Patron Saint Liars by Ann Patchett.  Tag, you're it  ;)

Current:

Lorazapam2mg: 4/9/152mg - 1.5mg: already sick/nothing noticed. No changes in sleep noted after illness.  

Lamictal: 7/27/13 - 8/6/13: 400mg - 500mg(dr order) mouth sores, headache, cognitive/balance, heart palp...8/7/13 - 8/23/13: 500mg - 400mg; symptoms↓...10/10/13: 350mg; fever/flu-like <2-weeks...12/30/13: 325mg; fever/flu-like symptoms <1-week...2/10/17: 300mg; no significant changes noted. 

 

Discontinued:

Omeprazole: 09/2103 40mg...5/1/14: 20mg... 8/21/14 = 0

Wellbutrin: 11/22/13: 300mg – 225mg...12/6/13 delayed reaction- mood swings, weight↓, heart palp/chest pain, alerting...12/14/13: 187mg; physical symptoms↓, neuro emotions ↑, weight stable...12/20/13: 225mg; physical symptoms return, emotions stable <1-week, weight↓...4/21/14: 187mg; weight↑...5/17/14 (neurologist ordered discontinue asap):168mg; headache, mood swings, ↑weight, sleep flux...5/24/14: 150mg; headache, mood swings, ↓cognitive/balance...6/2/14: 112mg; see above, weight stable, <3-weeks... 6/28/14: 100mg; moody...7/25/14: 87.5mg; family troubles... 8/4/14: 75mg; headaches; moody... 8/9/1450mg headaches... 8/12/14: 37.5mg; 8/17/14: 25mg...8/26/14 = 0

Hydroxyzine; 10mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. Mood changes/rage 

Buspirone: 7.5mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. No changes.

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

I have to go today, my 2 weeks are up tomorrow! 

I did download Bad Pharma by Ben Goldacre (?) onto my tablet, shame that doesn't count, lol. 

The rules are that I actually physically take myself next door, it is THAT close!! 

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

Link to comment

I play guitar and write music. I'm in a Technical Death Metal band and a Hardcore Punk band. I do not know where I would be without music and those bands in my life.

Began taking 50 mg of Zoloft for 6 months before tapering down to 25 mg for 3 months. Changed to 50 mg of Pristiq for 3 months, after 3 months was was put onto 50 mg of Clomipramine before gradually progressing to 200 mg as well as being instructed to cut the Pristiq in half and take it with the Clomipramine.

Link to comment

It is like I am just blank.  I had so many wonderful interests and hobbies.  Now I am so flat.  I'm not interested in anything.  I keep trying to get interested in something but I don't know what interests me anymore.  I feel like I have to force myself to find something but it is jut not happening.  I think about starting up my old interests but most of them I can't do and the others just don't interest me any longer.  I am so stuck.

 

Yet I am so bored I could scream.

 

How do you figure out what you are interested in when you are so flat line?

Link to comment

@ mommaP. Did you go? Its not too late. And, I just finished Bad Pharma. It is huge and sometimes painful to read so many deceptions we've fallen into. Pace yourself.

 

@Cryptopsy I don't listen to death metal tho my son plays it. I guess that means I have 2nd-hand exposure :) but music is powerful stuff.

 

@RebelMaven. I completely understand the lack of interest/motivation in old hobbies. I guess I don't know what I'm interested in so I am trying all the old things once or twice to see if maybe I can enjoy them

 

. I also created a bucket list. Some things are small and some are dreams for someday. I did cheat a little and added a couple of things I'd already done but was proud of (walked on fire )

Current:

Lorazapam2mg: 4/9/152mg - 1.5mg: already sick/nothing noticed. No changes in sleep noted after illness.  

Lamictal: 7/27/13 - 8/6/13: 400mg - 500mg(dr order) mouth sores, headache, cognitive/balance, heart palp...8/7/13 - 8/23/13: 500mg - 400mg; symptoms↓...10/10/13: 350mg; fever/flu-like <2-weeks...12/30/13: 325mg; fever/flu-like symptoms <1-week...2/10/17: 300mg; no significant changes noted. 

 

Discontinued:

Omeprazole: 09/2103 40mg...5/1/14: 20mg... 8/21/14 = 0

Wellbutrin: 11/22/13: 300mg – 225mg...12/6/13 delayed reaction- mood swings, weight↓, heart palp/chest pain, alerting...12/14/13: 187mg; physical symptoms↓, neuro emotions ↑, weight stable...12/20/13: 225mg; physical symptoms return, emotions stable <1-week, weight↓...4/21/14: 187mg; weight↑...5/17/14 (neurologist ordered discontinue asap):168mg; headache, mood swings, ↑weight, sleep flux...5/24/14: 150mg; headache, mood swings, ↓cognitive/balance...6/2/14: 112mg; see above, weight stable, <3-weeks... 6/28/14: 100mg; moody...7/25/14: 87.5mg; family troubles... 8/4/14: 75mg; headaches; moody... 8/9/1450mg headaches... 8/12/14: 37.5mg; 8/17/14: 25mg...8/26/14 = 0

Hydroxyzine; 10mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. Mood changes/rage 

Buspirone: 7.5mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. No changes.

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Amy I didn't get to the library, yesterday was so bad I wouldn't have been able to even put the bin out,

look at the video in off topic, I watched it from my window! Today it is closed, the hours are very limited

because it's quite rural. I've started bad pharma and was shocked in the very first chapter! 

 

Rebelmaven, I understand completely! I used to make gorgeous jewellery, and loved beads. 

I have thousands of beautiful beads and they are strewn over my hugs dining table waiting for

me to be inspired. I keep looking at them and waiting for inspiration to call but it doesn't  come! 

It will do one day though, I'm not putting them away again, hopefully if I fondle them enough 

I'll be inspired! 

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

Link to comment

It is like I am just blank. I had so many wonderful interests and hobbies. Now I am so flat. I'm not interested in anything. I keep trying to get interested in something but I don't know what interests me anymore. I feel like I have to force myself to find something but it is jut not happening. I think about starting up my old interests but most of them I can't do and the others just don't interest me any longer. I am so stuck.Yet I am so bored I could scream.

I'm at this same place although I realize that I never had a lot of hobbies completely unrelated to work. My horses became my focus after being put on disability, but I'm not even interested in them now which produces a boatload of guilt. I have to stay away from literature or books about the pharma industry. Too close to home and traumatizing. I feel like I'm testing the hypothesis that one can die of boredom. :o

Pristiq tapered over 8 months ending Spring 2011 after 18 years of polydrugging that began w/Zoloft for fatigue/general malaise (not mood). CURRENT: 1mg Klonopin qhs (SSRI bruxism), 75mg trazodone qhs, various hormonesLitigation for 11 years for Work-related injury, settled 2004. Involuntary medical retirement in 2001 (age 39). 2012 - brain MRI showing diffuse, chronic cerebrovascular damage/demyelination possibly vasculitis/cerebritis. Dx w/autoimmune polyendocrine failure.<p>2013 - Dx w/CNS Sjogren's Lupus (FANA antibodies first appeared in 1997 but missed by doc).

Link to comment

I used to be a horse trainer.  I had five horses of my own.  Western disciplines and dressage, colt starting and foundation training was my specialty.  Researching and reading books about my condition, pharmacology, neuropsychiatry and self-help took up a lot of my time.  I was constantly education myself about something in a variety of fields.  I had a 1/4 acre sustainable organic food garden.  I have a degree in veterinary medicine but lost my license because I could not get my **** together enough to go to do continuing education.  I also canned all my own food that I grew, baked artisan breads, made my own cheese, and I have a degree in accounting.

 

All gone now.  It all seems too painful and I am afraid to go back to any of those interests for fear of traumatizing myself.  I am urgently seeking some new interests but I just can't seem to find any.

 

The physical body may not die from boredom but the cognitive function deteriorates rapidly.  Scary..

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Things I've done since retirement:

 

Cook

Read

Go to Good Will…. buy cheap ugly needlepoint kits. I didn't say start them… I said buy them! Maybe this winter :)

Took old pallets apart… to make signs. Made a few..

Made olive oil infused with garlic and rosemary to cook with ( yum… easy)

Rearranged furniture.

Took in a cat that had been attacked by a dog for two weeks for the Humane Society. Cat did great.. good company but cat **** does STINK!

 

 

Google "DIY projects"  tons of ideas. Or "instructables" …. 

 

Attended a few community events but find I am pretty anti social. Spent too many years talking to people I didn't want to be with….

 

RU

Fall 1995 xanax, zoloft. switched to Serzone

1996- spring 2003serzone/ xanax/ lightbox.

b]Fall 2003- Fall 2004? Lexapro 10 mg. Light box /4 mg. xanax.[/b]

2004 - Fall of 2009 10 mg Lex, 150 mg Wellbutrin XL % 4 mg xanax

November 2009- Sept. 2011 10 mg lex., 300 Well. XL, 4 mg Xanax [/b

Sept.2012- July 2012 20 mg Lex 300 Well. XL, 4 mg Xanax

My mantra " go slow & with the flow "

3/2/13.. Began equal dosing 5 Xs /day xanax, while simultaneously incorporating a 2.5 % drop ( from 3.5 mg/day to 3.4 mg/day)

4/6/13 dropped from 300 mg. Wellbutrin XL to 150 mg. Difficult but DONE! Down to 3.3 mg xanax/ day / 6/10/13 3 mg xanax/day; 7/15/2013 2.88mg xanax/day.

10/ 1/2013...... 2.5 mg xanax… ( switched to tablets again) WOO HOO!!!!!! Holding here… cont. with Lexapro.

1/ 2/2014.. tapered to 18mg ( by weight) of a 26 mg ( by weight) pill of 20 mg tab. lexapro. goal is 13mg (by weight OR 10 mg by ingredient content) and STOPPED. Feeling very down with unbalanced, unpredictable WD symptoms.

1/2/2014- ??? Taking a brain-healing break from tapering anything after actively tapering something for 1.5 years. So… daily doses as of 2/2/2014: 18 mg by weight Lex, 150 mg Well. XL, 2.5 mg xanax, down from 26 mg by weight Lex., 300 mg well. XL, 4 mg xanax in August, 2012. I'll take it. :) 5/8/14 started equivalent dose liquid./ tabs. 5/13/14 1.5 % cut.

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RU

Would you please share the recipe for the infused olive oil? My best friend cooks and I think I could make that as a Christmas present for her.

Current:

Lorazapam2mg: 4/9/152mg - 1.5mg: already sick/nothing noticed. No changes in sleep noted after illness.  

Lamictal: 7/27/13 - 8/6/13: 400mg - 500mg(dr order) mouth sores, headache, cognitive/balance, heart palp...8/7/13 - 8/23/13: 500mg - 400mg; symptoms↓...10/10/13: 350mg; fever/flu-like <2-weeks...12/30/13: 325mg; fever/flu-like symptoms <1-week...2/10/17: 300mg; no significant changes noted. 

 

Discontinued:

Omeprazole: 09/2103 40mg...5/1/14: 20mg... 8/21/14 = 0

Wellbutrin: 11/22/13: 300mg – 225mg...12/6/13 delayed reaction- mood swings, weight↓, heart palp/chest pain, alerting...12/14/13: 187mg; physical symptoms↓, neuro emotions ↑, weight stable...12/20/13: 225mg; physical symptoms return, emotions stable <1-week, weight↓...4/21/14: 187mg; weight↑...5/17/14 (neurologist ordered discontinue asap):168mg; headache, mood swings, ↑weight, sleep flux...5/24/14: 150mg; headache, mood swings, ↓cognitive/balance...6/2/14: 112mg; see above, weight stable, <3-weeks... 6/28/14: 100mg; moody...7/25/14: 87.5mg; family troubles... 8/4/14: 75mg; headaches; moody... 8/9/1450mg headaches... 8/12/14: 37.5mg; 8/17/14: 25mg...8/26/14 = 0

Hydroxyzine; 10mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. Mood changes/rage 

Buspirone: 7.5mg: 5/20/15 *prn 4/5 times then dc'd. No changes.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Some great projects there RU, would love to tackle pallets, that is right up my street! 

I make my own garlic infused oil by peeling some cloves, about 1/3 of a jar, giving them a wallop to 

squash them slightly and release the oil. Put them in the jar and fill with olive oil.

When the oil is used I just top it up, much cheaper than the bought ones. 

 

My favourite place for inspiration is http://www.pinterest.com/

 

Prepare to be there for hours! 

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

RUWould you please share the recipe for the infused olive oil? My best friend cooks and I think I could make that as a Christmas present for her.

I make it the same as Mammap and sometimes add fresh rosemary as well.

 

The garlic automatically sinks… if you use rosemary it will float on top of the olive oil. So what I do is leave it out overnight..the rosemary will sink and then I refrigerate. Some people refrigerate some don't. It's ready to use in aout a week and it only gets better as time goes on!! 

 

Mammap… Pintrest is a seductress. :) 

Fall 1995 xanax, zoloft. switched to Serzone

1996- spring 2003serzone/ xanax/ lightbox.

b]Fall 2003- Fall 2004? Lexapro 10 mg. Light box /4 mg. xanax.[/b]

2004 - Fall of 2009 10 mg Lex, 150 mg Wellbutrin XL % 4 mg xanax

November 2009- Sept. 2011 10 mg lex., 300 Well. XL, 4 mg Xanax [/b

Sept.2012- July 2012 20 mg Lex 300 Well. XL, 4 mg Xanax

My mantra " go slow & with the flow "

3/2/13.. Began equal dosing 5 Xs /day xanax, while simultaneously incorporating a 2.5 % drop ( from 3.5 mg/day to 3.4 mg/day)

4/6/13 dropped from 300 mg. Wellbutrin XL to 150 mg. Difficult but DONE! Down to 3.3 mg xanax/ day / 6/10/13 3 mg xanax/day; 7/15/2013 2.88mg xanax/day.

10/ 1/2013...... 2.5 mg xanax… ( switched to tablets again) WOO HOO!!!!!! Holding here… cont. with Lexapro.

1/ 2/2014.. tapered to 18mg ( by weight) of a 26 mg ( by weight) pill of 20 mg tab. lexapro. goal is 13mg (by weight OR 10 mg by ingredient content) and STOPPED. Feeling very down with unbalanced, unpredictable WD symptoms.

1/2/2014- ??? Taking a brain-healing break from tapering anything after actively tapering something for 1.5 years. So… daily doses as of 2/2/2014: 18 mg by weight Lex, 150 mg Well. XL, 2.5 mg xanax, down from 26 mg by weight Lex., 300 mg well. XL, 4 mg xanax in August, 2012. I'll take it. :) 5/8/14 started equivalent dose liquid./ tabs. 5/13/14 1.5 % cut.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

I made earrings for my elderly neighbour. The brief was pink, sparkly and dangly.

Simple and not perfect but I'm happy to have done something after 

years of inactivity! I've ordered proper storage and can't wait for it to arrive now so I can sort out

my stash.  :) Thank you for this topic Alex, it gave me the kick I needed! 

 

 

post-1803-0-10662400-1386887152_thumb.jpg

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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