lobster

☼ lobster: fight or flight

605 posts in this topic

It's great that you are still working and getting some sunshine as well as sleep.  Ultimately in the long run it would pay to eventually get off the Statin drugs as they are somewhat debilitating in the long term. The same effect can be attained through diet and exercise even though the doctors won't tell you that. 

It's just something to think about down the track but right now it's more important to maintain stability. Would you mind updating your signature to reflect your current status.  Thanks in advance.

Ali

It's great that you are still working and getting some sunshine as well as sleep.  Ultimately in the long run it would pay to eventually get off the Statin drugs as they are somewhat debilitating in the long term. The same effect can be attained through diet and exercise even though the doctors won't tell you that. 

It's just something to think about down the track but right now it's more important to maintain stability. Would you mind updating your signature to reflect your current status.  Thanks in advance.

Ali

 

Thank you . I agree about letting things settle for a while, then trying to get off the statin. I updated my signature the best I can . The sun does help for sure it seems in almost every aspect.

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I Usually go to sleep early as I get up very early for my fishing job . I'm in bed by 8pm, I know I act like an old person lol . Right now I'm waking up  at  11pm, 2am and then around 4am the last couple nights I haven't had an issue getting back to sleep  . Before this last episode I would go to sleep at 8 and if I were going to wake up it would always be 2am and 4am . It's like clock work and it's usually with in the minute.

 

heh, yeh when I've noticed the time, or figured it out by tv or radio shows, it's been 2 am and 4 am

don't know what it is about those particular times, but I'll be soooooo glad to sleep straight thru to even 5am

that would be great!!

 

oh if I thought I could sleep around 8pm I"d be in bed too lol. Esp since I am pretty much always awake from 4 am on.

 

I go to bed a lot earlier than most of my online friends, and I'm often off the computer by 9 pm which upsets a lot of them. oh well.

but I find I need to lay down when I am getting sleepy- if I push it and try to stay up later, past that point, I end up with NO sleep that night.

 

I've got friends who want to come and visit and stay til 11pm, which for them is early (they are college "kids") but I finally had to tell them that's too late for me.

:/

I really want to see them but I don't want to lose an entire night's sleep :P

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I Usually go to sleep early as I get up very early for my fishing job . I'm in bed by 8pm, I know I act like an old person lol . Right now I'm waking up  at  11pm, 2am and then around 4am the last couple nights I haven't had an issue getting back to sleep  . Before this last episode I would go to sleep at 8 and if I were going to wake up it would always be 2am and 4am . It's like clock work and it's usually with in the minute.

 

heh, yeh when I've noticed the time, or figured it out by tv or radio shows, it's been 2 am and 4 am

don't know what it is about those particular times, but I'll be soooooo glad to sleep straight thru to even 5am

that would be great!!

 

oh if I thought I could sleep around 8pm I"d be in bed too lol. Esp since I am pretty much always awake from 4 am on.

 

I go to bed a lot earlier than most of my online friends, and I'm often off the computer by 9 pm which upsets a lot of them. oh well.

but I find I need to lay down when I am getting sleepy- if I push it and try to stay up later, past that point, I end up with NO sleep that night.

 

I've got friends who want to come and visit and stay til 11pm, which for them is early (they are college "kids") but I finally had to tell them that's too late for me.

:/

I really want to see them but I don't want to lose an entire night's sleep :P

 

Lol I can understand that , 11 is to late for me to. Our sleep time sounds similar . I fell asleep early last night ,the first half of the night I slept ok but the second half was filled with weird dreams . I will probably go for a few days with the dreams, then It should level out based on my past experiences :)  tomorrow makes 6 months off Lexapro I'm hoping things get back to some what normal before long  :) Have a good day .

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Lol I can understand that , 11 is to late for me to. Our sleep time sounds similar . I fell asleep early last night ,the first half of the night I slept ok but the second half was filled with weird dreams . I will probably go for a few days with the dreams, then It should level out based on my past experiences :)  tomorrow makes 6 months off Lexapro I'm hoping things get back to some what normal before long  :) Have a good day .

 

yeh our sleep is quite similar. after a few bad nights, I'll have one night where I'll have one short dream, just before waking up around 4 and then the next night, I may have a bunch of dreams, often not pleasant ones. I think it's the brain trying to make up for that lack of REM sleep from when we didn't sleep long enough to get to REM sleep (I think REM sleep happens at the end of a sleep cycle...?)

 

 

6 mos off, eh? and you jumped off at 0.8mgs? is that right?

 

I am at 0.22 mgs right now and don't plan to jump off til I get to around 0.05 or so LOL I am so scared of having an acute episode of WD symptoms like I did last October.

 

how long did it take you to get to 0.8? what did you start at? I've read thru your signature but for some reason I can't seem to figure it out.

I'm not great with numbers :/

 

I plan to go down from 0.22 to 0.21, then 0.20, then .019, 0.18 etc etc;  til I get to 0.05

This will take a very long time LOL I figure I'll be done around Sept 2018

I just made an almost 10% cut and I think it was too much.

 

so I'm just gonna crawl thru this.

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Yes 6 months off. I had a lot of trouble getting from 5mg to 0.8 and it took me quite a while . I'm not sure how long it took me exactly,I was doing a 10% tapper at first and it was to much so I ended up doing a 5% every six weeks . I had a couple crash and burn times where I had to go back up a little and now I'm having some difficulty and just riding it out lol I have noticed the same thing . I'll have a couple bad nights then sleep decent for a few ,then have one night with maybe one dream ,then several nights with lots of dreams . I think it's because after the bad nights we get deeper sleep then after we get more rebound rem sleep ,but maybe I'm wrong . I have always had a weight issue and over eaten,I could manage it though because of my work ,I have quite a bit of muscle . I usually maintained between 220lb and 250. When I started on the lexapro and everything, I went up to 280 and could not get back down no matter what I did . Now the weight is falling off and I'm not sure if I'm returning to pre lexapro or what's up . I still don't have an appetite but can eat now, with no problems and I am but I really have no desire to eat . I'm a little concerned with the amount of weight loss . If I had to guess I'd say maybe 20lbs in 2.5 to 3 weeks . Keep in mind pre lexapro I could take weight off fast to, if I decided to change my ways of eating. Maybe I'm just getting back to the normal me? :-)

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thanks for sharing your tapering history Lobster.  I went too fast a couple of times, so I'm trying very hard to go slow.

 

However it *seems* like the lower I go, the better I can sleep. No clue if that's true, but...........

last night I slept from 10 to 5 am and only woke up ONCE to go to the bathroom and crawl into bed (started off on the sofa, I turned on the 10pm news to check the weather and don't recall seeing even the beginning of it LOL)

Next thing I knew, I was aware of dreaming and woke up with a moderate cortisol spike (probably from eating poorly yesterday, and I don't know, maybe the dreams?)

 

I don't want to get too excited, because I'm sure there will be set backs. As they say, 3 steps forward, 2 steps back. Maybe it'll just be one step back ;-)

 

I lost a lot of weight when I crashed, and I've continued to lose wt, only more slowly now. If you are eating good, nutritious foods, losing wt is not harmful. (read Dr Furhmans books, or watch him on PBS- rapid wt loss on a high nutrient diet is not dangerous)

 

I sometimes add high calorie foods because I was overwt for so long, even though being closer to a normal wt is a good thing, it is a big change and I don't entirely like it. My clothes are falling off and I get cold easier. But I will drop the high calorie foods as the weather gets warmer and then, I guess, I better go clothes shopping LOL

 

you'll feel a lot better as you lose wt, I bet.  I think the better diet and wt loss have accelerated my healing. A lot of the foods we eat cause inflammation in the body, including in the brain, that is not good for you and can cause diseases. Getting rid of that inflammation by eating healthy foods can only be a good and healing thing.

 

right? :)

 

hope you have a good day today. I'm not looking forward to this soaking rain we're expecting, ick LOL

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Feeling pretty sick today ,horrible anxiety . I'm trying to keep a positive attitude though . I wish I knew if this was really from with drawl or just the way I'm going to be . I'm still having anxiety attacks in my sleep at the beginning of the night that leaves me filled with anxiety, I thought my sleep was improvong but last night wasnt good .It continues threw the day . Hopefully it lifts this afternoon. Tomorrow makes 6 months off lexapro. I hope that there will be some steady improvement with things before long . I went into a pet store today and the blue neon lights almost made me sick ,it was nice to see the animals though :-) I'm having a very hard time with intrusive thinking and keeping things level. Yesterday I took 250 mg of vitamin B12 I'm thinking it wasn't a good idea . I couldn't get to sleep and when I would doze I would wake with pins and needles in my hands and feet and terrible anxiety. I did sleep after a while though ,4 or 5 hours so that's better then nothing . I'm sure this will pass in time , I just wish it would come sooner then later lol.

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Sorry to hear you are having a rough day, Lobster.

 

 

Tomorrow makes ONLY 6 months off lexapro. 

 

I fixed your post for you!

 

It is not "how you are going to be."  It is withdrawal. You are really in the relatively early stages considering what many have gone through.  Take comfort in the fact that you are doing as well as you are.  Read some of the other stories and be grateful for how well it is going.

 

You will be fine.  Nobody can tell you when for sure but stay the course and you will be fine.

 

Best,

 

Andy

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Sorry to hear you are having a rough day, Lobster.

 

 

 

Tomorrow makes ONLY 6 months off lexapro.

 

 

I fixed your post for you!

 

It is not "how you are going to be."  It is withdrawal. You are really in the relatively early stages considering what many have gone through.  Take comfort in the fact that you are doing as well as you are.  Read some of the other stories and be grateful for how well it is going.

 

You will be fine.  Nobody can tell you when for sure but stay the course and you will be fine.

 

Best,

 

Andy

 

Thanks Andy :-) I've had so much trouble getting of lexapro the last 5 years . Cold turkey attempt, going to fast before I found this forum ,it feels like it's taken forever. I have felt this low before and made it threw, granted I took sleeping meds every night for three months before I had a natural sleep . I'm doing better with that this time ,so I guess that's a victory . I haven't felt good since my first attempt to get off this stuf in 2011. I'll come to at some point . Thanks for the reality check . I guess I'm just tired after this many years .Thanks Andy .

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happy Saturday to you, Lobster!! hope you have a great day

 

when we're feeling bad, it can SEEM like we've always felt this way, but in reality, we've had good days and neutral days and even some great moments here and there.

 

when you're feeling bad, try to think of the small things that you are grateful for, the things that we tend to take for granted that many others do not have, like a roof over our heads and plenty of food.

it's a way to reframe things so you see that even when you *feel* bad, that's just a feeling and it does not define how things really ARE.

 

the feelings will come and go. just let them do that, and before you know it, you'll be back on level ground or better.

 

it's a long road, but another way to look at it, is, look how strong and courageous you are, that you have made it this far!! good for you!

 

we are all a lot stronger than we probably ever knew. this is not going to last forever, you are almost completely healed now. Your brain is just making a few minor adjustments, fine tuning things.

in the meantime, keep working on how you see things and how you think about them. That is something YOU can change, and changing how you THINK about things, can  change how you feel about them as well.

 

focus on the good things, and the good will grow.

;-)

you can do this!!

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happy Saturday to you, Lobster!! hope you have a great day

 

when we're feeling bad, it can SEEM like we've always felt this way, but in reality, we've had good days and neutral days and even some great moments here and there.

 

when you're feeling bad, try to think of the small things that you are grateful for, the things that we tend to take for granted that many others do not have, like a roof over our heads and plenty of food.

it's a way to reframe things so you see that even when you *feel* bad, that's just a feeling and it does not define how things really ARE.

 

the feelings will come and go. just let them do that, and before you know it, you'll be back on level ground or better.

 

it's a long road, but another way to look at it, is, look how strong and courageous you are, that you have made it this far!! good for you!

 

we are all a lot stronger than we probably ever knew. this is not going to last forever, you are almost completely healed now. Your brain is just making a few minor adjustments, fine tuning things.

in the meantime, keep working on how you see things and how you think about them. That is something YOU can change, and changing how you THINK about things, can  change how you feel about them as well.

 

focus on the good things, and the good will grow.

;-)

you can do this!!

Thank you for the words of encouragement:-) I had a decent night and that helped . I'm outside with my son today cleaning up the property. Clearing trees and burning brush ,so that helps me to keep busy . I need to remember the good days and times in between the bad :-) I hope you have a great day and thanks again :-)

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Good morning every one  :) started taking vitamin D yesterday in hopes it might help with a few things . I have Coq10 to take to, but I will take one thing at a time for a little while to see if, or what it does .  I'm still struggling with bad anxiety off and on ,I feel like I've been turned into a hypochondriac at certain times over health things, I'm making up in my mind that I know aren't true . I'm also still dealing with bad depersonilization . My sleep is still funky , One night I will have bad panic and anxiety as I'm dozing and end up with 4 or 5 hours of sleep, then the next night, I'll get 7 hours of decent sleep. Of that seven hours , the first 5 or 6 hours are pretty good the next couple will be filled with continuous dreaming , maybe catching up on rem sleep? I never used to remember many of my dreams in years gone by.  I'm going on a month now caught up in this state. I would say things are improving some over all though . I'm seeing a pattern with my sleep , one bad night and the next night is always better . The days I have a bad night, the next day I'm still able to function and do things , I never seem to get tired so that's good . I'm not panicking that much any more about the bad nights now, as I know I will get some sleep and the next night will be better .  I'm not feeling as hopeless about the situation, that I feel I'm in right now so that's good . We have had sun shine lately and that has been really nice , Spring is starting and the flowers are coming up :)  I'm sure as time goes on, I'll get more used to this situation, the anxiety will lessen and I will adjust, that will make the healing go faster. Have a good day every one :)  

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Hi there Lobster! It's good to hear that you are dealing with WD better now!! I am just reading a very interesting book (deadly medicines by Godzsche) wich is yet again very eye opening to the massive destructive facts of antidepressants . Makes me realise ones more that we are not crazy or mentally sick. We've been poisoned by a Lobby and we can count ourselves lucky to be able to withdraw from those pills. And we can be proud of our strength and progress. NO ONE who hasn't experienced this sort of mental torture can understand what we're going through and thankfully there are more and more doctors who speek the truth!

You are only 6 months in WD. It might take a while longer to be fully healed but at least you are now doing whats best for youself- even if it might not seem that way regarding to how you feel most of the time;) wishing you continious improvement and coping!

Pepita

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Hi there Lobster! It's good to hear that you are dealing with WD better now!! I am just reading a very interesting book (deadly medicines by Godzsche) wich is yet again very eye opening to the massive destructive facts of antidepressants . Makes me realise ones more that we are not crazy or mentally sick. We've been poisoned by a Lobby and we can count ourselves lucky to be able to withdraw from those pills. And we can be proud of our strength and progress. NO ONE who hasn't experienced this sort of mental torture can understand what we're going through and thankfully there are more and more doctors who speek the truth!

You are only 6 months in WD. It might take a while longer to be fully healed but at least you are now doing whats best for youself- even if it might not seem that way regarding to how you feel most of the time;) wishing you continious improvement and coping!

Pepita

Thank you :) I agree, you have to be there to understand what it feels like. At times I do feel like I'm crazy lol  :D  this to will pass. It has been a long road to this point, I have had lots off bad times just trying to getting off the lexapro . I first started trying to get off it in 2012 and it has been miserable. It took years trying to wean down but I did it . I should be thankful that I have finally made it this far, 6 months off completely. I had times that I never thought it was possible and I'm here . 

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hi lobster! so good to hear you sounding more hopeful. it's a long road yes, BUT we only have to take it one day at a time, or one minute at a time during the rough patches, so it's manageable this way. ;-)

 

I hear what you're saying, getting off lexapro is rough! I've tried to get off it several times since 2002. Once I was off for 8 mos but went back on because I didn't know anything about WD and thought I "needed" it. :(

Then since 2012 (just realized, that's the same time frame as you've mentioned for your journey)

I've tried twice (not counting *this* time) to lower the dose down, getting down to around 10 mgs and not being able to go any further. This is my final time, this time I"m not trying, I'm succeeding!!

so yeh, it's not an easy drug to get off of, for sure. But going slow and steady, we WILL get there!

 

I do think improving our overall health makes a huge difference in how well WD goes. I am currently healthier than I have been in over 30 years; no, now that I think of it, this is the BEST health I've ever been in.

My diet is mostly clean, my wt is normal for my height. My blood pressure is normal without meds, I don't need meds for GERD or IBS or atrial fibrillation any more. I rarely need to take pain meds for my spinal stenosis/DDD/arthritis.

I exercise  and walk a lot, which is great for both your body AND your brain! I try to add more things that engage my mind- reading, playing scrabble, etc. I do need to add some more challenging things for my brain/concentration, but I'm easing into that.

 

anyway, it's a PROCESS and we learn as we go along. You are learning that you can overcome the anxiety by how you think about things. You can stop yourself from thinking that the worst is going to happen when you have a bad night, or a couple of bad nights, by remembering that you've had good nights. And even if you had a long run of bad nights, you can see that you've gotten thru them in the past, so you'll get thru them if you have to again. No, of course we don't *want to* get thru this, but sometimes we have no choice. So better to accept it and make the best of things in any way we can, rather than obsess about it or get upset. Right?

I am so impressed with how far you've come in such a short period of time!

You're doing a lot of work and it's paying off.

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hi lobster! so good to hear you sounding more hopeful. it's a long road yes, BUT we only have to take it one day at a time, or one minute at a time during the rough patches, so it's manageable this way. ;-)

 

I hear what you're saying, getting off lexapro is rough! I've tried to get off it several times since 2002. Once I was off for 8 mos but went back on because I didn't know anything about WD and thought I "needed" it. :(

Then since 2012 (just realized, that's the same time frame as you've mentioned for your journey)

I've tried twice (not counting *this* time) to lower the dose down, getting down to around 10 mgs and not being able to go any further. This is my final time, this time I"m not trying, I'm succeeding!!

so yeh, it's not an easy drug to get off of, for sure. But going slow and steady, we WILL get there!

 

I do think improving our overall health makes a huge difference in how well WD goes. I am currently healthier than I have been in over 30 years; no, now that I think of it, this is the BEST health I've ever been in.

My diet is mostly clean, my wt is normal for my height. My blood pressure is normal without meds, I don't need meds for GERD or IBS or atrial fibrillation any more. I rarely need to take pain meds for my spinal stenosis/DDD/arthritis.

I exercise  and walk a lot, which is great for both your body AND your brain! I try to add more things that engage my mind- reading, playing scrabble, etc. I do need to add some more challenging things for my brain/concentration, but I'm easing into that.

 

anyway, it's a PROCESS and we learn as we go along. You are learning that you can overcome the anxiety by how you think about things. You can stop yourself from thinking that the worst is going to happen when you have a bad night, or a couple of bad nights, by remembering that you've had good nights. And even if you had a long run of bad nights, you can see that you've gotten thru them in the past, so you'll get thru them if you have to again. No, of course we don't *want to* get thru this, but sometimes we have no choice. So better to accept it and make the best of things in any way we can, rather than obsess about it or get upset. Right?

I am so impressed with how far you've come in such a short period of time!

You're doing a lot of work and it's paying off.

You will get off lexapro this time I'm sure  :) You are right about being healthy and feeling better over all . I'm working hard on that and loosing weight and that is making me feel better . I'm out side now most days in the sun and working so that's helping to . I have noticed a pattern with my bad times these last 5 years . My first episode was in march 2012. My father passed away in November of 2011 and that march was when every thing went to Hell for me and I notice if I have bad issues it's in march and gets better by mid April, not sure if there is a connection or not but something I noticed . It could be also due to the fact I don't do much in the winter and don't get a lot of sun shine . I'm noticing right now if I get sun shine during the day, I feel much better and seem to sleep better . That's one reason I started taking Vitamin D yesterday , hoping it would help . I'm thinking after a long winter maybe my levels are low . I'm sure, I and your self will get threw all of this and in the end be much stronger for it . Have a great day  :)

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hope things are going well for you Lobster

 

had a couple of rough days here and in spite of knowing better, I feel like things have "always been bad and will always be bad"

 

Hard to remember that I had great days not so long ago.

 

bad days, with waves, really suck!

 

but, you're right, we'll get thru this and will come out the other side much stronger.

 

I never really wanted to be this strong, hahaha, but I guess it was meant to be,eh?

:/

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hope things are going well for you Lobster

 

had a couple of rough days here and in spite of knowing better, I feel like things have "always been bad and will always be bad"

 

Hard to remember that I had great days not so long ago.

 

bad days, with waves, really suck!

 

but, you're right, we'll get thru this and will come out the other side much stronger.

 

I never really wanted to be this strong, hahaha, but I guess it was meant to be,eh?

:/

I'm sorry you have had some rough days and I understand how you feel . Hopefully that passes quickly and your in a nice window soon . I have been Ok My sleep is regulating and getting better . I have been taking 1000 IU of Vitamin D3 a day and I think that might be helping . I still haven't taken the COQ10 yet I'm waiting on that for a little bit . Over all I think things are better with some not great days, but going in the right direction I think  :)

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glad to hear things are looking up!!

 

glad the vid D3 seems to be helping.

I started taking glycine a few days ago and have had great results with it!  I still wake up a lot, but I think I always have (I have PTSD so I've always had nightmares) so waking up is not the problem, so much as how I feel when I wake up- and whether or not I can get back to sleep.

Now I feel fine when I wake up and I can very easily get back to sleep!!  at least until 4 or 5 am, which is fantastic. I go to bed a bit earlier, now, around 9, and have fallen asleep as early as 9:30 (but usually not til around 11)

 

I don't know how many hours of sleep I get, but I don't stress over the numbers, I go by how I feel.

the sleep I'm getting now seems to be much more restful "good" sleep.
I am also sleeping long enough to dream. I think this is a good thing.

 

I take 500mgs of glycine at night and since it can also help with anxiety, I take 500mgs in the morning w/my morning meds and about an hour  or so later, my morning anxiety is greatly reduced as well.

I will have to monitor my symptoms carefully, though, because too much glycine can cause anxiety!! it's another one of those things that can go paradoxical on you if you take too much, apparently

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I'm very glad to hear that Glycine is working for you . Is that amino acid? I was diagnosed PTSD as well . I'm not sure of the diagnosis though. I have had a lot of issues and anxiety back as far as I can remember especially in my younger years . It did go away and things were good my teenage years and my 20s were good to . I didn't have any more problems until my dad passed away when I was 30. Most of my sleeping Issues are anxiety related except When things go from sleeping fine and getting 8 hours to not sleeping and also not being tired at all I'm pretty sure that is from the Lexapro withdrawal. So far the month of April hasn't been to bad and I'm gaining on 7 months off of lexapro :) last month was much worse for me and I feel I'm making decent progress now . The sun shine really helps to .  

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I'm very glad to hear that Glycine is working for you . Is that amino acid? I was diagnosed PTSD as well . I'm not sure of the diagnosis though. I have had a lot of issues and anxiety back as far as I can remember especially in my younger years . It did go away and things were good my teenage years and my 20s were good to . I didn't have any more problems until my dad passed away when I was 30. Most of my sleeping Issues are anxiety related except When things go from sleeping fine and getting 8 hours to not sleeping and also not being tired at all I'm pretty sure that is from the Lexapro withdrawal. So far the month of April hasn't been to bad and I'm gaining on 7 months off of lexapro :) last month was much worse for me and I feel I'm making decent progress now . The sun shine really helps to .  

 

 

hi Lobster, sorry I am just answering this now, I thought I had already.  My memory is swiss cheesed by WD I guess.

 

yes glycine is an amino acid. I started out taking half a capsule (500mgs) but then saw that more might be better, so I've gradually increased it and it def helps with anxiety and *seems* to help with sleep (or it relaxes me enough that I can get back to sleep easier, I'm not sure which)

I did have a couple of bad nights (very little sleep) since starting it, but I upped the dose to 2 capsules last night and got some good sleep. Now........who knows if that would have happened anyway, since I was sleep deprived?  I still wake up a lot, but I was able to go right back to sleep last night, so that was nice

Been awake since 4 am but that's normal for me. I take a gylcine when i wake up at 4 and sometimes I can get in another half hour or a couple of half hour naps before i get up, sometimes not.

at least the glycine seems to help a lot with anxiety. :)

 

if your docs told you that you have PTSD they are probably right.  The way you describe things leads me to think that you have PTSD. A loss can surely trigger PTSD symptoms, it has for me (lost my brother, my cat of 17 yrs and several other losses)

 

 I am starting therapy this week for PTSD. I think we are going to work on skills building before we get down to the cognitive behavioral aspect, I'm not sure though. I'll find out soon. I'll let you know how it goes. I've been struggling with PTSD for most of my life (was abused in every way possible starting very early in childhood) I don't know if I'll ever be totally free of the symptoms but I hope that I can at least get them to be less troublesome.

 

oh yes, I agree, the not sleeping but not feeling tired- that is def Lexapro withdrawal! it's so strange. You know your body must be tired, but you can't feel it at all.

 

I am starting to get that feeling of tiredness now and while no one likes to feel tired, I like the "normal-ness" of it, ya know?

the more things that are closer to what I consider "normal" , the better and less anxious I feel overall.

 

Maybe you can try glycine if you have trouble with anxiety again? Not sure if it'd work for you, these supplements seem to vary a LOT in how they affect different people. But it might be worth a shot

 

this is a link to the thread about it: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/5487-%E2%98%BC-lobster-fight-or-flight/page-17

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I'm very glad to hear that Glycine is working for you . Is that amino acid? I was diagnosed PTSD as well . I'm not sure of the diagnosis though. I have had a lot of issues and anxiety back as far as I can remember especially in my younger years . It did go away and things were good my teenage years and my 20s were good to . I didn't have any more problems until my dad passed away when I was 30. Most of my sleeping Issues are anxiety related except When things go from sleeping fine and getting 8 hours to not sleeping and also not being tired at all I'm pretty sure that is from the Lexapro withdrawal. So far the month of April hasn't been to bad and I'm gaining on 7 months off of lexapro :) last month was much worse for me and I feel I'm making decent progress now . The sun shine really helps to .  

 

 

hi Lobster, sorry I am just answering this now, I thought I had already.  My memory is swiss cheesed by WD I guess.

 

yes glycine is an amino acid. I started out taking half a capsule (500mgs) but then saw that more might be better, so I've gradually increased it and it def helps with anxiety and *seems* to help with sleep (or it relaxes me enough that I can get back to sleep easier, I'm not sure which)

I did have a couple of bad nights (very little sleep) since starting it, but I upped the dose to 2 capsules last night and got some good sleep. Now........who knows if that would have happened anyway, since I was sleep deprived?  I still wake up a lot, but I was able to go right back to sleep last night, so that was nice

Been awake since 4 am but that's normal for me. I take a gylcine when i wake up at 4 and sometimes I can get in another half hour or a couple of half hour naps before i get up, sometimes not.

at least the glycine seems to help a lot with anxiety. :)

 

if your docs told you that you have PTSD they are probably right.  The way you describe things leads me to think that you have PTSD. A loss can surely trigger PTSD symptoms, it has for me (lost my brother, my cat of 17 yrs and several other losses)

 

 I am starting therapy this week for PTSD. I think we are going to work on skills building before we get down to the cognitive behavioral aspect, I'm not sure though. I'll find out soon. I'll let you know how it goes. I've been struggling with PTSD for most of my life (was abused in every way possible starting very early in childhood) I don't know if I'll ever be totally free of the symptoms but I hope that I can at least get them to be less troublesome.

 

oh yes, I agree, the not sleeping but not feeling tired- that is def Lexapro withdrawal! it's so strange. You know your body must be tired, but you can't feel it at all.

 

I am starting to get that feeling of tiredness now and while no one likes to feel tired, I like the "normal-ness" of it, ya know?

the more things that are closer to what I consider "normal" , the better and less anxious I feel overall.

 

Maybe you can try glycine if you have trouble with anxiety again? Not sure if it'd work for you, these supplements seem to vary a LOT in how they affect different people. But it might be worth a shot

 

this is a link to the thread about it: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/5487-%E2%98%BC-lobster-fight-or-flight/page-17

 

I understand about having a memory like Swiss cheese lol . I might look into the Glycine for anxiety, it's worth a shot .  I really hope the counseling and things work for you . I would be interested in hearing how it goes for you . I have been looking into hypnosis for some of my issues, primarily my fear of not sleeping and might give that a try this fall once things settle down for my fishing  :) I do need something for my PTSD to help me deal with issues . I have other child hood issues as well , My mother abandoned me and my father when I was young and he raised me . loosing him and then trying to revive him was hard to deal with, but I have made it this far and have a lot more life to live yet :) I know I will always have Issues and I'm ok with that, I just want things to be more manageable and get some relief from the anxiety and constant rumination of bad things .  I have been sleeping ok waking a lot in the night but I can usually go back to sleep as time goes buy I'm sure it will improve . I'm gaining on 7 months off lexapro day by day lol .

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I understand about having a memory like Swiss cheese lol . I might look into the Glycine for anxiety, it's worth a shot .  I really hope the counseling and things work for you . I would be interested in hearing how it goes for you . I have been looking into hypnosis for some of my issues, primarily my fear of not sleeping and might give that a try this fall once things settle down for my fishing  :) I do need something for my PTSD to help me deal with issues . I have other child hood issues as well , My mother abandoned me and my father when I was young and he raised me . loosing him and then trying to revive him was hard to deal with, but I have made it this far and have a lot more life to live yet :) I know I will always have Issues and I'm ok with that, I just want things to be more manageable and get some relief from the anxiety and constant rumination of bad things .  I have been sleeping ok waking a lot in the night but I can usually go back to sleep as time goes buy I'm sure it will improve . I'm gaining on 7 months off lexapro day by day lol .

 

sorry about your childhood stuff, combined with your dad's death, yeh, that's definitely traumatic. I think hypnosis is a good idea. I'd like to do something like that myself, I'm just too tired lately to look into it. Let me know if you find anything. I was thinking more along the lines of using a tape or cd, not seeing someone, for hypnosis. I don't know, my brain's not working this morning...

 

I just realized that your last dose of lexapro was a lot higher than my current dose. I am on 0.21mgs and will go to 0.2 in mid May or later (not sure yet, I am thinking I want to do a long hold and stabilize some more)

 

Now, I know the past almost 7 mos have not been totally great, but overall, you mostly were doing ok right? except for just after getting off, and then again around the 6 mos mark, when you had bad waves, don't you think you were getting along pretty well?

The reason I ask is, that I sometimes get anxious about the possibility of not being able to get the liquid lexapro (I probably *will* be able to) I worry that it would be horrible and that I might not make it thru it, but because you're doing ok, It gives me hope that I'd be ok, if I had to stop now at my lower dose.

I mean, I know people have cold turkey'd and been ok- eventually- but it also seems to take years. It definitely seems like even an imperfect taper gives you better results as far as how long out the symptoms last and how bad they are.

 

I hope your sleep is still good. Mine is mostly ok, some bad nights here and there but still much, much better overall.

I even sleep long enough to dream! and I am starting to feel tired, which is nice, cuz it's normal LOL

 

 

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Lobster. I'm so sorry. A lot of us have been to hell and back with family issues. It seems to be a common denominator but one where you have to move on. I do hope you can do that. 

 

Are you walking ?  In the sun ?  That is one of the best things you can do. How is your sleep now ? 

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I have found with my own family issues that acceptance is important in helping to move on from the anger that can sometimes keep you stuck in the past.

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Lobster. I'm so sorry. A lot of us have been to hell and back with family issues. It seems to be a common denominator but one where you have to move on. I do hope you can do that. 

 

Are you walking ?  In the sun ?  That is one of the best things you can do. How is your sleep now ? 

Thank you  :) I am out side a lot but it has been very rainy and foggy for weeks and that does not really help things. I'm taking Vitamin D because of the lack of sun, I think it helps.   My sleep is so so . I usually fall asleep around 8 PM . I seem to wake up a fair amount through the night but most times only for a few seconds to a minute then fall back asleep, I usually get up around 4 Am . I do have a lot of dreams now, Before every thing I hardy ever had dreams or that I could remember , I'm talking before lexapro and all my issues. The dreaming really started a couple months after I stopped Lexapro completely. I'm also having pretty red eyes and that has been going on for a while now . I just had my yearly eye exam it's only been 4 years since I last went lol and every thing was good I have developed a slight astigmatism now , that could explain the slight blurriness, that I have been blaming on WD,  they think my red eyes are  just dry eyes. I don't think its sleep related , I do think I'm getting enough sleep as I'm never tired during the day. I do seem to be having an interest in things again its small but it seems to be growing . I'm getting a little excited to start working some carpentry on my house again and some of my hobbies :)  I will be 7 months off lexapro on May 8th. I don't want to say to much, but I do feel better then I did in march and my sleep is better then It was then for sure . Summer is coming and I cant wait for the sunshiny days that makes every thing seem so much better  :)

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I understand about having a memory like Swiss cheese lol . I might look into the Glycine for anxiety, it's worth a shot .  I really hope the counseling and things work for you . I would be interested in hearing how it goes for you . I have been looking into hypnosis for some of my issues, primarily my fear of not sleeping and might give that a try this fall once things settle down for my fishing  :) I do need something for my PTSD to help me deal with issues . I have other child hood issues as well , My mother abandoned me and my father when I was young and he raised me . loosing him and then trying to revive him was hard to deal with, but I have made it this far and have a lot more life to live yet :) I know I will always have Issues and I'm ok with that, I just want things to be more manageable and get some relief from the anxiety and constant rumination of bad things .  I have been sleeping ok waking a lot in the night but I can usually go back to sleep as time goes buy I'm sure it will improve . I'm gaining on 7 months off lexapro day by day lol .

 

sorry about your childhood stuff, combined with your dad's death, yeh, that's definitely traumatic. I think hypnosis is a good idea. I'd like to do something like that myself, I'm just too tired lately to look into it. Let me know if you find anything. I was thinking more along the lines of using a tape or cd, not seeing someone, for hypnosis. I don't know, my brain's not working this morning...

 

I just realized that your last dose of lexapro was a lot higher than my current dose. I am on 0.21mgs and will go to 0.2 in mid May or later (not sure yet, I am thinking I want to do a long hold and stabilize some more)

 

Now, I know the past almost 7 mos have not been totally great, but overall, you mostly were doing ok right? except for just after getting off, and then again around the 6 mos mark, when you had bad waves, don't you think you were getting along pretty well?

The reason I ask is, that I sometimes get anxious about the possibility of not being able to get the liquid lexapro (I probably *will* be able to) I worry that it would be horrible and that I might not make it thru it, but because you're doing ok, It gives me hope that I'd be ok, if I had to stop now at my lower dose.

I mean, I know people have cold turkey'd and been ok- eventually- but it also seems to take years. It definitely seems like even an imperfect taper gives you better results as far as how long out the symptoms last and how bad they are.

 

I hope your sleep is still good. Mine is mostly ok, some bad nights here and there but still much, much better overall.

I even sleep long enough to dream! and I am starting to feel tired, which is nice, cuz it's normal LOL

 

I think you will do Just fine coming off , you have been going slow and easy . I stopped every thing in October and had no real issues with any thing until 6 months out . I would have probably been ok ,but I got pretty sick with a virus and I was up nights with that, then my Son was sick to and having issues with some anxiety . The combination of every thing plus the WD was to much at that time and my sleep went down hill. I had been in a good place sleep wise for over a year so when it hit me I wasn't used to dealing with it again and every thing started to slide . I have been doing better and seem to be coming around more all the time . The end of February and March were pretty hard for me, April hasn't been to bad and things seem to going ok now. I still have some bad days and occasional bad starts to the night but getting better slowly I think . I was doing a 5% tapper every 6 weeks and Jumped off at .08 Mg, I was having a hard time measuring that . It might not have hurt me to do a long hold at that amount then gone off , I don't think I was really stable from the other drops yet . I really think you will do good coming off . My sleep is better . I wake quite a bit during the night but go back to sleep pretty quick. I do have a lot of dreams and things but it seems to be in the later part of the night to early morning . I also learned that antidepressants suppress Rem sleep, so it could be rebound Rem sleep for all the years on Lexapro? not sure but I can live with it . For the most part , my dreams aren't scary or violent, just a lot of different things . I do see my dad in my dreams some times and that is always nice :)  I will let you know how the hypnosis goes , I'm planing on it this fall , there is some one that specializes in this close by, so I can go and do it and get back home in the same day  :)

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Hi every one Just an update . I haven't been on here very much lately but I'm still holding my own and back working most every day now . I still have bad days and good days, the anxiety is still an issue, I have been having a lot of stress with different things but I keep on keeping on :rolleyes: I'm gaining on 9 months of being Lexapro free :) I hope every one is doing good , take care . 

 

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so good to hear from you Lobster, I've been wondering how things have been going for you.

sorry about the stress but glad to see you're doing well!

 

9 moss off!! I can hardly wait til that is me

I'm down to .18 now and holding.

I'm having more good days than bad now, so I want to hold a long while til my brain has time to catch up from all the ups, downs and CTs in the past.

 

then I hope to slide on down and join you in the DRUG FREE place!!

 

:)

 

please continue to update us on your progress! I believe at one year off, you get to write to your success story, at least I think that's how it works here

;-)

 

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