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DruggedinJapan: being prescribed lots of meds: scared


DruggedinJapan

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Hi,

 

I am an Australian expat living in Tokyo , Japan.

 

I first became depressed 10 years ago after finding out I could no longer be with the love of my life ( that is a very long story in itself )

 

I left Japan , threw away my business and returned to Australia in a heap. I now know I have suffered anxiety for most of my life, but it was extreme at that point and I also suffered deep depression for the first time in my life.

 

I was put on Zoloft - but attempted suicide twice.

 

Once I realized that I had thrown away my business in Japan and the life I had, I became more depressed and anxious.

 

I began drinking alcohol heavily for the first time in my life.

 

I did not feel comfortable in Australia after so many years away, and somehow managed to move to Thailand for 4 years where I taught English to Japanese expats to get by ( I speak Japanese )

 

During the four years in Thailand I continued Zoloft and became an alcoholic. I was very depressed the whole time.

 

I then returned to Australia for 3 years. My medication was changed from Zoloft to Effexor.

 

The Effexor seemed to work better.

 

I still used alcohol to numb my thoughts of the past of my list love and good life I once had.

 

I returned to Japan after going to a detox resort in Thailand 3 years ago. I had hoped to regain some of the good life I once had.

 

I managed to get off medication as I was feeling positive for the first time in years.

 

As time went on, I realized that the life I had here in Tokyo no longer existed. My friends had either moved on or were busy with families.

 

The earthquake hit and in hindsight , this was when I started drinking heavily again as the country came to a standstill and finding a job became hard and I started spending my time in bars.

 

Eventually I became very depressed again , and I have been on a roller coaster ever since - being prescribed ADs, benzo anxiety pills and sleeping meds.

 

My medication has been changed several times. I have had times when things were going well and managed to stop ADs - though I was still taking benzos and sleepers.

 

Late last year I was feeling positive about starting a small business. I had reduced my meds and was not drinking heavily.

 

The business failed and I took it very hard.

 

Winter hit the same time ( always a tough time for me as I can't handle the cold very well) and I spend months at home , locked away from the world and drinking heavier than I ever had.

 

I had become suicidal again and was haunted by thoughts of the Past ( what could have been )

 

My mother was worried about me and enquired about which sleeping pills I was taking. As it turns out, the pills branded myslee in Japan , are called stilnox in Australia , and ambien in the US.

 

It just so happens that at this time this sleeping med was in many media stories, as many Australian athletes had been prescribed it and were having serious side effects.

 

I knew I had to do something.

 

I made enquiries to Australian hospitals and got all of the information I could. It seemed using Valium to 'detox' from alcohol and ambien was the recommended way.

 

I almost checked myself into a Japanese hospital but luckily I did not as I found out later they would only have pumped me full of large amounts of Valium for a month before letting me out - the people in Australian hospitals were strongly against this, so I decided to be treated as an outpatient.

 

I have now been free of alcohol for 3 weeks and have finally realized that not only has alcohol made my life and problems worse - I feel I can never drink again. Living an alcohol free life is what I did ( mostly ) before I became depressed , so I feel that not drinking is a good thing and will give me a better chance of getting my life back.

 

I tapered down and stopped the ambien also 3 weeks ago.

 

I had many sleepless nights but I managed to kick alcohol and ambien.

 

The problem is, I still take ADs and other medication but I still feel very depressed and anxious.

 

I was hoping I would be beginning to feel better than I feel now.

 

Now that I am making efforts for the first time in many years to truly make an effort to get well I have been researching the medication I have been taking , the side effects and have found out how scary these things are.

 

It is very hard for me to find information here in Japan. Japanese doctors only have one way of dealing with things. Meds, meds and more meds.

 

I now understand that meds have been hindering my attempts to get well in the past and feel that they have effected me in more ways than I believed over the past 10 years.

 

Before I stopped drinking and Ambien I went to my doctor who prescribed more ADs.

 

I am now sober , taking a lot of meds and very depressed and anxious.

 

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

 

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day ( I was put on this to get off the Valium and an anxiety beno ( Etizolum ) that I have been on for 2 years.

 

I also take 2 x 15mg of an AD called Reflex here in Japan which is called mirtazapine in the US.

 

I have also been prescribed a new sleeping tablet that has no side effects and is non addictive - according to my doctor.

 

I have made many foolish decisions and have not felt 'myself' in many years.

 

My actions have made me a very lonely and sad man - who has spent what are supposed to be the best years of my life moving from country to country , making no foundations or forming no relationships.

 

I am sometimes suicidal but I still have some fight in me and I want to try and get my life back -- or Atleast be able to enjoy myself for the first time in ten years.

 

I believe the only way I can do this is to do the right things. Eat well , exercise etc AND be medication FREE.

 

I now understand that I suffer anxiety , but after years of meds the anxiety is still there - until I take another pill - and of course the longer you take them the more you need.

 

I would be forever grateful if I were able to get the help I need .

 

Kind regards.

Edited by scallywag
tags

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

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I really do worry about the amount of medication I am on. Despite the medication I am deeply depressed and plagued with anxiety.

 

I have attempted suicide twice but not for many years - although recently I truly feel I have ruined my life , and messed myself up beyond repair.

 

The most noticeable side effect of ADs has been the reduction ( or total lack of ) libido. This has given me a complex and at times when I have had a chance of perhaps forming a new relationship, I have run for the hills.

 

Not being in a relationship for such a long time has meant I have spent many years thinking about the girl from years ago who I originally became depressed over. These thoughts become seriously obsessive at times . It's horrible. When I snap out of it I feel so depressed and anxious I really feel my life is over.

 

I adore kids, and feel that not getting married and having kids when I had the chance 10 years ago means I blew my chance in life.

 

I am now 46 and after 10 years wasted on self pity, Alcohol and ADs I can't help but think I have mised the boat on life.

 

I believe the only chance I have is to get off all medication and away from their side effects.

 

I would love to have my confidence back and be able to live my life :(

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi DruggedinJapan,

Welcome and thank you for sharing your story.  You have been through a lot and have taken a lot of different medications, its no wonder you are feeling so bad.  It was a bit difficult from reading your post to understand which drugs you are still on.  Please would you put your drug and withdrawal history in your signature, it makes it easier to see your situation, instructions are here:

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/893-please-put-your-withdrawal-history-in-your-signature/

 

Congratulations on getting off the Ambien and for giving up alcohol.  Are you able to get ongoing support there in Japan for staying off Alcohol, are there AA meetings there?  I think its wonderful that you have decided to turn your life around and make a new start.

 

Are you experiencing any withdrawal symptoms at the moment?  Once we know a little more about your drug situation, we should be able to support you in tapering off in a safe way.  Have you ever looked into therapy as a way of handling anxiety and depression?

 

46 is still young you have plenty of time to have a good life, meet someone and even start a family.

 

You will find a lot of support here.

 

Petu.

I'm not a doctor.  My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one.

My Introduction Thread

Full Drug and Withdrawal History

Brief Summary

Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects

2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010

Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal

DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms

Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal)

May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins.

Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes

Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine

Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D

June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens.

Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered

Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days.

April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close.

VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from?



VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made?



VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes?



VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects?

VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes

 

 

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

I just read through your post again and see you are on Cymbalta, Mirtazapine, lorazepam and a sleeping pill.  We generally recommend only tapering one drug at a time and usually the most activating one first, I'm not sure which one of the ADs that would be so someone else would be able to help you there.  But here are our tips for tapering Cymbalta and Mirtazapine which you can have a look at:

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/283-tips-for-tapering-off-cymbalta-duloxetine/?hl=cymbalta

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/5301-tips-for-tapering-off-remeron-mirtazapine/?hl=mirtazapine

 

More help should be along soon.

I'm not a doctor.  My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one.

My Introduction Thread

Full Drug and Withdrawal History

Brief Summary

Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects

2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010

Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal

DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms

Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal)

May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins.

Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes

Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine

Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D

June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens.

Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered

Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days.

April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close.

VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from?



VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made?



VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes?



VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects?

VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes

 

 

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Welcome DruggedinJapan,

 

Thank you for sharing your story…that is truly a brave first step to healing.

 

As you have discovered, there are no easy ways around our difficult times in life & as much as I would like to say that the work ahead in tapering will be a breeze, it likely will be somewhat challenging & definitely not a breeze.

 

I just wanted to say that upfront.

 

That's the bad news. The good news is that keeping an open mind, some determination and work , maybe some highs and lows, your desire " to have my confidence back and be able to live my life" is completely within your reach. 

 

Have you sought any talk therapy or counseling to help you deal with the initial break up of the love relationship? 

 

Again, welcome, and I'm glad that you are here. You will get top- notch advice for tapering from the medications that you are on and also check out the symptoms and self help forum… it has great suggestions for more natural ways to deal with WD and anxiety.

 

RU

Fall 1995 xanax, zoloft. switched to Serzone

1996- spring 2003serzone/ xanax/ lightbox.

b]Fall 2003- Fall 2004? Lexapro 10 mg. Light box /4 mg. xanax.[/b]

2004 - Fall of 2009 10 mg Lex, 150 mg Wellbutrin XL % 4 mg xanax

November 2009- Sept. 2011 10 mg lex., 300 Well. XL, 4 mg Xanax [/b

Sept.2012- July 2012 20 mg Lex 300 Well. XL, 4 mg Xanax

My mantra " go slow & with the flow "

3/2/13.. Began equal dosing 5 Xs /day xanax, while simultaneously incorporating a 2.5 % drop ( from 3.5 mg/day to 3.4 mg/day)

4/6/13 dropped from 300 mg. Wellbutrin XL to 150 mg. Difficult but DONE! Down to 3.3 mg xanax/ day / 6/10/13 3 mg xanax/day; 7/15/2013 2.88mg xanax/day.

10/ 1/2013...... 2.5 mg xanax… ( switched to tablets again) WOO HOO!!!!!! Holding here… cont. with Lexapro.

1/ 2/2014.. tapered to 18mg ( by weight) of a 26 mg ( by weight) pill of 20 mg tab. lexapro. goal is 13mg (by weight OR 10 mg by ingredient content) and STOPPED. Feeling very down with unbalanced, unpredictable WD symptoms.

1/2/2014- ??? Taking a brain-healing break from tapering anything after actively tapering something for 1.5 years. So… daily doses as of 2/2/2014: 18 mg by weight Lex, 150 mg Well. XL, 2.5 mg xanax, down from 26 mg by weight Lex., 300 mg well. XL, 4 mg xanax in August, 2012. I'll take it. :) 5/8/14 started equivalent dose liquid./ tabs. 5/13/14 1.5 % cut.

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Thank you so much for your reply and kind words Petu.

 

I will write the medication I take in my signature after this post.

 

I have been to 3 AA meetings here but did not feel very comfortable. The group was very small in my neighborhood ( only 5 or 6 people ) and as I have a hard enough time being around people I know , I had anxiety attacks each time and just couldn't wait to leave. Perhaps if the groups were bigger I would have met somebody I could have related to better. That said, I now have a fear of alcohol and have accepted that I must remain a non drinker if I want to get my life back. As my mother said " nobody decent wants to get involved with somebody with a drinking problem ". I was able to laugh and forget my worries when I drank - but when tough times came , I would drink heavier and eventually end up depressed , locked away in my small apartment crying my eyes out. I never want to go back there!

 

I still cry, but Atleast I don't have to deal with all of the extra problems that go with alcohol.

 

I have tried counseling , an online 'spiritual healer ' and have had several EFT/NLP sessions to try and reprogram my sub conscious mind.

 

A gained a bit of help from all of the above, but have always ended up where I began when my attempts at getting other things in my life back on track have failed.

 

I have been close to feeling well, stopping alcohol, but I have still been on medication of some type - which I am beginning to think is the reason I have never fully recovered.

 

I have used loneliness as an excuse for being depressed , but the truth is I have been lonely for the past ten years because I chose to wallow in self pity , and dealt with my problems poorly - making them worse.

 

I have always had anxiety in social situations, but social anxiety has become worse with the complex that goes with medication and the side effects , and is the reason I used alcohol for so long. Alcohol just made my problems worse though as the lack of libido caused by medication and depression has meant that even at times when I met a potential partner I would only get their phone number , and did not have the courage , confidence or self esteem to call them when I was sober .

 

I have really made a mess of things but I feel that I have come to a cross road and it is either carry on leading the same life (if you could call it that ) or make some drastic changes.

 

I am so happy to find this forum and hold hopes that you wonderful people can help guide me through the steps I need to take to get off medication , which along with stopping alcohol will allow me to start living again.

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

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Thank you Areyouthere.

 

As I mentioned , I have tried counseling to help me with the relationship from long ago.

 

It really is hard to find help here in Japan as a foreigner. Not to mention the cost. I have just been getting by on my monthly pay check ( I teach english in high schools here which doesn't pay that well ) but I am certainly spending much less money now that I have stopped drinking.

 

I am not sure how much help counseling gives me though. In the past I have either just broken down when discussing my past , or felt so uncomfortable I wanted to get out of there ASAP. Perhaps it was just the particular counselors I had managed to get hold of. It really is hard being a foreigner with mental health issues in Japan.

 

As I have already mentioned the Japanese way is to just pump people full of medication. I presume that is because they are just overwhelmed with patients and don't know what else to do. Japan has a very high large amount of people with psychological problems due to the stress people live with. Japan also has the highest rate of suicide in the world

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

Link to comment

Thank you again Petu!

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi DruggedinJapan

 

How long have you been off the ambien and how long did it take to taper off that? Just trying to work out whether you are in withdrawal now. Sorry if you've answered that and I've missed it

 

Also how is your sleep at the moment?

 

Dalsaan

Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

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Hi DruggedinJapan

 

How long have you been off the ambien and how long did it take to taper off that? Just trying to work out whether you are in withdrawal now. Sorry if you've answered that and I've missed it

 

Also how is your sleep at the moment?

 

Dalsaan

Hi Dalsaan,

 

Thank you so much for your reply and question!

 

I have been wondering about the withdrawals from Ambien. My doctor here knows nothing at all about the side effects of this drug. I told him about the Australian Olympic swimming team having side effects from it, and how it is now a category 8 drug (the same as morphine) and he didn't seem concerned in the least.

 

I was taking 5mg ( 1 pill ) per night for almost 2 years. Early on in that 2 years I was taking 2 pills but reduced it to one after a few months as I was feeling better at the time. In around mid January this year, after my business failed I was taking 2 or 3 per night and drinking heavier than I have in my life. When I discovered (through my mother) that I was taking Ambien (it's called myslee here) I started taking only the one. I did this for around 3 weeks - a month. Then starting one month ago I began taking only half. Three weeks ago I stopped taking Ambien. I could not sleep at all, but luckily it was spring vacation and I did not have to go to work and I would usually get a couple of hours sleep - quite often not until 9am after being awake all night.

 

The insomnia was very bad and I told my doctor. My doctor at that time gave me Zopiclone, but as I was now researching the medication I was taking I did a google search and discovered that Zopiclone is highly addictive and has bad side effects too. I decided not to take it and started taking half of an Ambien pill again to get some sleep.

 

I then changed back to my old doctor and was put on a pill which he assured me was non addictive and has very few side effects. I was so desperate to get some sleep I did not google it, and have only looked at the brand tonight. it is called Roserem (8mg pills) - any information on Roserem would be appreciated..

 

I started those one week ago and have been sleeping better BUT I did not realize that my doctor had also added another anti-depressant on top of the cymbalta and mirtazapine! - My doctor does not speak English, and although me Japanese language ability is OK, I have problems sometimes with medical jargon.

 

I went to him today and have had that extra anti-depressant taken off me prescription (hope I don't get withdrawals from that :( )

 

So to answer your question simply (sorry for the rant) , it has only been a week/10 days since I totally stopped Ambien - after taking half for a week or two.

 

I have been sleeping OK (mostly, but not always) for the past week since starting Roserem and the other new AD which is taken at night to also aid sleep. But tonight I will stop taking the new AD.

 

I should also mention that I used 15mg of valium per day for 2 weeks when stopping alcohol and ambien as I was told there was a risk of me having a seizure if I did not use valium.

 

I replaced the valium with lorazepam (0.5mg) 3 times a day one week ago . I was also taking Epizolam for 2 years and stopped this one week ago also. I was taking up to 5 (1mg) pills per day, but reduced that to 2 or 3 as my doctor said I would not need as much because of the valium.

 

He told me there would be NO side effects changing from valium and Epizolam to lorazepam because they were all in the benzo group.

 

Any information on this would be great as I have been feeling VERY depressed and anxious for the past week or two.

 

In the past when I stopped drinking I soon felt less depressed, but I have never changed medication at the same time - and of course I still had the effects of all the medication and never really felt like 'me'.

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

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I have just checked the label of the extra AD I was given one week ago. It is called Undepre (25mg)

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

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I am annoyed that my doctor prescribed me more ADs after telling him I wanted to get off medication. My serotonin levels are already messed up despite being on 2 other ADs :(

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

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I just read through your post again and see you are on Cymbalta, Mirtazapine, lorazepam and a sleeping pill.  We generally recommend only tapering one drug at a time and usually the most activating one first, I'm not sure which one of the ADs that would be so someone else would be able to help you there.  But here are our tips for tapering Cymbalta and Mirtazapine which you can have a look at:

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/283-tips-for-tapering-off-cymbalta-duloxetine/?hl=cymbalta

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/5301-tips-for-tapering-off-remeron-mirtazapine/?hl=mirtazapine

 

More help should be along soon.

Wow! the tapering down seems to be very long and difficult. In the past when I stopped Cymbalta my doctor told me that I go from 2 pills to one for a week, then stop. I have stopped mirtazapine in the past the same way. At the time I was able to stop, I had some good things happening in my life for the first time in a long time, and seemed to do it quite easily. But I was still taking Ambien and Epizolam and when the 'good things happening' did not last, I began drinking heavily again and taking more Epizolum. And months later I was so depressed I was put back on mirtazapine, and eventually cymbalta.

 

I was taking only 20mg of cymbalta until about 2 months ago - when the dosage was increased to 40mg

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

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I'm so happy I have found this site. But I do worry how long it may take me to feel 'normal' again.

 

Can anybody give me an idea of how long it will take me to be med free? Will I be able to sleep? Will I still suffer anxiety?

 

:unsure:

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Yes, it's going to take a while to get off the meds and feel normal again. You've been on and off a lot of meds for ten years.

 

You're probably experiencing withdrawal from the Ambien right now as well as the Valium, and you've also very recently quit drinking, so I'm not surprised you're not feeling well and you're having trouble sleeping.

 

Roserem may be making you feel worse http://www.drugs.com/sfx/rozerem-side-effects.html 

 

It's actually not uncommon for people to develop a drinking problem, sometimes other drugs as well, after starting on antidepressants. We see it here pretty often. The ADs cause side effects and we tend to self-medicate for those side effects, I think, or there may be something else going on, not sure, I just know that I've seen it a lot and I drank a lot more when I was on ADs than I do now myself.

 

Here are my suggestions for you:

 

Think of this time right now as a healing and stabilizing and learning time. There's no easy solution for what you're going through right now and given how quickly you've come off Ambien and Valium you are likely to be feeling worse before you feel better. Plus it sounds like that Rozerem doesn't make a person feel so great either maybe.

 

If it were me, I would see if I could get a prescription for a low dose of Valium, maybe 2-5 mg, and stabilize on that for a few months and then taper off properly. I would probably also go back to a small dose of Ambien (2.5 mg is half of the smallest tablet they make) and stop the Rozerem, because better the bad drug you know than the bad drug you don't. With those drugs, at three weeks out the withdrawal is only beginning, especially with the Valium. Also, it's best to take a small dose daily rather than take it intermittently, which is playing pingpong with your brain.

 

Then I would stay on those dosages of things for at least a few months, until you have time to recover and stabilize from all the most recent changes you've been through. Quitting drinking in itself is a big change and I think you should probably explore finding some support--AA, counseling, or just supportive friends.

 

While you're stabilizing, read through the materials on tapering and withdrawal on this website. All the topics that are "pinned" at the tops of the pages and all the links that are in those topics. Also, after a few weeks, get a copy of Anatomy of an Epidemic by Robert Whitaker and read that.

 

This is going to be a project on the same scale as going back to college and getting a graduate degree. Begin to think of it and accept it as such.

 

The sooner you accept that this is going to be a long and not-easy process, the better, and the more likely you'll stand a chance of actually succeeding.

 

I'll be perfectly frank, in my experience it takes a lot of determination and strength and courage, and a lot of willingness to listen and learn and work hard and change and endure, for someone with a history like yours to stand a chance of getting off meds. It can be done, however. Many people with worse histories have done it. It usually takes two to five years to get through the process.

Edited by Altostrata
fixed link

Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. 

Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010.  Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea.

 

Feb 15 2010:  300 mg Neurontin  200 Lamictal   10 Celexa      0.65 Xanax   and 5 mg Ambien 

Feb 10 2014:   62 Lamictal    1.1 Celexa         0.135 Xanax    1.8 Valium

Feb 10 2015:   50 Lamictal      0.875 Celexa    0.11 Xanax      1.5 Valium

Feb 15 2016:   47.5 Lamictal   0.75 Celexa      0.0875 Xanax    1.42 Valium    

2/12/20             12                       0.045               0.007                   1 

May 2021            7                       0.01                  0.0037                1

Feb 2022            6                      0!!!                     0.00167               0.98                2.5 mg Ambien

Oct 2022       4.5 mg Lamictal    (off Celexa, off Xanax)   0.95 Valium    Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet 

 

I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion.

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Hi

Ditto everything Rhi said really. You are at the the beginning of a long road. But and a big but, you only have to do this a day at a time.

I strongly recommend you go back to AA. During your early recovery (first year) try not to listen to the advice you give yourself. It's often wrong. Our best thinking got us where we are!

Just sit in the meetings and soak it up. You can and will get better. Therapy relaxation techniques, any port in a storm:-)

This is is the advice I give myself when I tell myself I don't need a meeting.

I'm 2 years sober. Listen to the guys here re your meds.i

Seroxat 1994 then Citalopram 2000- 2014 quit Citalopram CT and descended into Hell with PAWS pollydrugged on following Mirtazapine 30 mgs Seroquel 150 mgs 

 Ativan 2 mgs June 2015 switched from Ativan to 20 mgs Valium Tapered-down slowly.

As of 15th March 17, I am benzo free. took 20 months to taper 20mgs Valium.

Seroquel tapered off 125mgs from 19 Sept 17 to 26 Dec. 17

current med 30mgs Mirtazapine

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi druggedinjapan

 

Thanks for providing the additional info on ambien, Valium etc. when you get a chance could you add all that detail to your signature so that we can read your drug history at a glance. There are some good examples of signatures in the posts by people who have replied to you. With the cocktail of drugs you have had and the amount of change, it's important we keep your history in mind when making recommendations

 

Dalsaan

Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

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Hi everyone, and thank you very much for the replies.

 

Rhi: Thanks for taking the time to post such a long reply. 

 

I have to admit that I burst out crying when I read your post. I have only just began researching my medication - and the information id shocking and very worrying. Basically, my brain chemistry is shot, and it's going to take a long time to get back to 'normal'. I have already lost 10 years of my life, and the thought of losing another 2 - 5 is VERY worrying. I will be in my 50's by then. I don't know if I can handle the loneliness that goes with the medication. I have a very bad complex about the meds and their side effects, and tend to avoid getting close to people.

 

The things you have told me a very different from what my doctor says - but hey, what do they know? They just believe what the drug companies tell them, and have probably never used the medication themselves.

 

The side effects of Roserem have me very worried. My doctor told me this pill has the least side effects and is non-addictive. But I will do as you say and go back to half an ambien instead. This worries me, as it really feels like a step backwards.

 

Your thoughts on ADs and drinking are interesting. As you stated, I began to feel the urge to drink as soon as I was put on ADs. What horrible things they are.

 

I am so glad that I did not listen to my Japanese doctors and decided to research things. I was told that I should take 5mg of valium 3 times a day for 6 months after stopping alcohol. My doctor knew nothing of the side effects of ambien!

 

I took the 15mg of valium for 2 weeks, then stopped it and replaced it with lorazapam (0.5mg) . I also stopped the Etizolam anxiety pills I was on for about 2 years. I have taken 5mg of valium every few days - when I was feeling exceptionally bad, but have not taken it for a few days. I was hooked on valium many years ago and voiced my concerns about this with my doctor, but I was told it is not possible to get hooked while using it for only 2 weeks. Your advice is to go back on valium. What about the lorazapam, and Etizolam? I was told that lorazapam would be better to use than valium, and I would no longer need to take etizolam while taking lorazapam as they are all benzo drugs. could you please let me know what you think about the lorazapam and Etizolam. i have not taken etizolam for about 10 days after taking it for about 2 years.

 

Regarding the alcohol, my friends have accepted that I no longer drink. They know I have been on a roller coaster ride for a long time, and are supportive. Most of them do not know about the other meds I use though. I have been to 3 AA meetings here in Japan, and the group in my neighborhood only consists of 5-6 people. I did not feel comfortable with them. To be honest, although I have a lot of respect for people who find comfort in religion, the meetings were very religious orientated and I felt very uneasy with that. I currently have no interest in alcohol, and feel I have accepted that not drinking is a large part of my recovery, and essential for me in getting my life back.

 

oh how I wish I had known the damage this medication was doing to me years ago :( 

 

I guess I have to accept that it will take a long time to get off meds. I have been told that my brain chemistry can repair itself in 6 months by people with experience - not doctors. If I work on other areas of my health, such as exercise, is it possible to speed up the tapering ? Do I really have to spend years getting off these drugs? I have been able to get off them before, but due to some stressfull times, and returning to heavy drinking I went back on medication without knowing that I was getting myself in for. I should say that i stopped all ADs. I was still taking 5mg of ambien per night, and only one epizolam ( I was taking 5 (1mg) at my worst period)

 

I'm sorry to question your advice, but I am quite hysterical here, pondering the thought of many more years on medication, now that I have stopped drinking and decided to get my life back. The thought of years more of ADs and meds is something I am finding very hard to accept. I don't know if I can handle the thought of being in my 50's by the time I am well. Is this my only option? I already feel that the clock is ticking regarding the time I have left in creating a life I can be content with.

 

Again, I'm sorry to question your advice, but reading your post today has got me into hysterics.

 

Northcoastboy: Thanks for your reply. Happy to hear you are 2 years sober. I think that the AA meetings in western countries would be much more beneficial for me, as it would be easier to find somebody to relate to as the meetings are much bigger. The meetings here are very small and quite often far away. Somebody like me in Japan has fewer resources to turn to. I suppose I will need to find alternative things to do. I do believe I have accepted alcohol is out for me though. I really wish I had not spent years pickling my brain on the stuff, as I am now in a worse condition than I was when I first became depressed 10 years ago.

 

Dalsaan: Thanks for your reply. OK. I will edit my signature. I have been on such a cocktail for so long it will be hard to remember exactly what I have taken over the years now.

 

Looking back, I have not felt much different over the years. But since coming back to japan 3 years ago, I have been prescribed more medication than ever - which have only messed up my brain chemistry more - and have not really made much difference in the way I feel :(

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

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I would like to add that I have been clenching my jaw for the past week or so. Could anybody tell me why ?

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

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Hi

I have some knowledge of Japan in that I had a Japanese student stay with us for a year. His mum visited when he graduated.

I currently go to NA where the God stuff is a less.

I am agnostic/Buddhist if there is such a thing:-) there is now anyway.

I also like Pascal's wager "It's better to believe and be right and not believe and be wrong"

I do pray especially in the middle of the night when I think I'm losing the plot!

I was raised Catholic and have no affinity to organised religion at all. I do like the idea of a power greater than me.

My AA sponsor is firmly atheist. He is 23 years sober.

 

Re read what Rhi said yesterday!

 

3 meetings. When you've done 300 come back to me and see if you have a different opinion:-)

Seroxat 1994 then Citalopram 2000- 2014 quit Citalopram CT and descended into Hell with PAWS pollydrugged on following Mirtazapine 30 mgs Seroquel 150 mgs 

 Ativan 2 mgs June 2015 switched from Ativan to 20 mgs Valium Tapered-down slowly.

As of 15th March 17, I am benzo free. took 20 months to taper 20mgs Valium.

Seroquel tapered off 125mgs from 19 Sept 17 to 26 Dec. 17

current med 30mgs Mirtazapine

 

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  • Member

There are AA meetings online:

 

http://aa-intergroup.org/

 

You have a lot of worries about the future, which is understandable. Every single one of us here has that. Reread that sentence. You are not alone. We all worry that the future will be dismal but none of us ever thinks that it will be better if we do something to change it now. Rhi is doing the world's slowest taper, she's still doing it and is holding down a job.

 

Your mind immediately fastened on the length of time it 'might' take and wants to give up now. You have to focus it on today only and the support here can help you with that. And isn't there a possibility that you will start to feel better long before you are completely off the meds and continue to stay sober?

 

I will be in my 70's IF it takes me that long to fully recover just from the results of protracted WD. (if it takes me as long to recover for the 8 years I was on the drugs) Will that be about the time when a lifetime of poor diet and bad lifestyle choices catch up with me?

 

We all have our own fears but can help each other get through each day in spite of them. I gave up on finding a mate and stopped dating 25 years ago. Who's to say that might not change now that I am off the drugs? That is not my biggest worry. Recovery is.

 

Your jaw pain could be from any number of reasons. Get it checked out by a doc or dentist if it is worrisome. If nothing is found, it is probably one of the zillion symptoms of bodily upsets we seem to have. Some members have found relief from this by using bite guards.

 

Hang in there!

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

First, let me say that my ideas are not commands, only suggestions. I am definitely NOT a doctor, just someone with a lot of experience, and basically I'm just telling you what I would do if I were in your shoes. Your situation is very complicated and there are no simple, obvious answers. There is nothing that I can think of that's going to "fix" things right now. I'm just looking at what I might do if I were you to help mitigate some of the worst of it.

 

The reason I think you might do better with a daily dose of Valium is because what you are doing (taking it irregularly) actually can worsen your symptoms because it causes a roller coaster effect. Our brains thrive on consistency and stability, and fluctuating drug levels are not good for them. Rather than taking 5 mg occasionally I think you'd be better off taking a small dose (say 2 mg) daily, becoming stable on that, and then tapering off by reducing by a small amount every day. The reason I said up to 5 mg is because you have just come off such a high dose of it suddenly and you've also just quit that etizolam (which I know nothing about but as it's a benzo analogue it probably has a withdrawal syndrome as well).

 

As far as the lorazepam, unfortunately benzos are not interchangeable, so lorazepam might buffer diazepam and etizolam withdrawal effects but it won't completely prevent them. Also, since lorazepam is fast-acting and then goes away fast, people seem to do best if they take multiple doses per day spaced out evenly. It sounds like you're on three doses a day, which is a good start (people usually end up needing to take four to six for optimal stability).

 

Personally if it were me I would probably just stick with the Valium and not change to a different benzo which is every bit as addictive. But doctors aren't always supportive of people taking Valium, and you may have other reasons for the change-over.  I don't know enough of the details on that. Your situation is so complex that I can't confidently predict what will and won't work for you. Perhaps just staying on the lorazepam, riding out the withdrawals, and then tapering it later is the best option.

 

As far as Ambien versus Rozerem, if it were me I would stick with the one I know rather than trying something new. It's strictly up to you though. If you were having terrible side effects from the Ambien, then maybe it's worth trying something new. We just find that overall, changing meds is destabilizing and harsh to the CNS, so I just generally don't recommend it if there's no compelling reason.

 

As for the time frame of getting off psych drugs, well, that I can do nothing about. There is no easy fix. There is no way to do it faster than your brain can heal. Believe me, if there was, I would have already told you about it. There's no substitute for time.

 

Most people feel the way you do when they realize the situation they're in with that. All I can say is, would you rather spend five years getting off them, or stay on them the rest of your life? As you taper down and get to much lower doses you will find the effects of the drugs will lessen greatly, so you don't have to stay in limbo and wait for your life, you can be living your life as you taper and getting yourself back well before the end of the taper.

 

You have a lot to learn and a lot to think about. If you change any meds now, please make the changes small, and then don't change anything else for a while; you've come through too many changes already and the months ahead are going to be challenging as your CNS and body adapt to those changes. Once you're feeling pretty stable, you can look at where it makes sense to start first.

 

I don't know about the Undepre, it appears to contain trazodone. If it were me and I had only been taking it a week and I were on all the other drugs you're on, I would probably not even take it. Up to you.

 

If it were me, I'd make the changes I've described, I think, and then hang on for a while and let the dust settle, and meanwhile use that time to educate myself and prepare for this rather grand project.  

 

Again, check out the reading I suggested.

Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. 

Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010.  Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea.

 

Feb 15 2010:  300 mg Neurontin  200 Lamictal   10 Celexa      0.65 Xanax   and 5 mg Ambien 

Feb 10 2014:   62 Lamictal    1.1 Celexa         0.135 Xanax    1.8 Valium

Feb 10 2015:   50 Lamictal      0.875 Celexa    0.11 Xanax      1.5 Valium

Feb 15 2016:   47.5 Lamictal   0.75 Celexa      0.0875 Xanax    1.42 Valium    

2/12/20             12                       0.045               0.007                   1 

May 2021            7                       0.01                  0.0037                1

Feb 2022            6                      0!!!                     0.00167               0.98                2.5 mg Ambien

Oct 2022       4.5 mg Lamictal    (off Celexa, off Xanax)   0.95 Valium    Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet 

 

I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

I would add this: Unfortunately there are very few experts in the world where these drugs are concerned. You're going to have to learn to be your own guru. Take your time; this is the only brain you get, so it's worth taking the situation seriously. Read, question, and learn learn learn. Educate yourself. You can do this.

 

You and you alone are the ultimate expert on your own body; listen to your body and let it teach you. If you take your time, you will grow in confidence and you can take back the control and power from the "experts" and figure it out for yourself. This is probably the most important skill in getting off psych meds--learning to listen to your own body and make choices accordingly.

 

I'm sorry it's so hard.

Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. 

Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010.  Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea.

 

Feb 15 2010:  300 mg Neurontin  200 Lamictal   10 Celexa      0.65 Xanax   and 5 mg Ambien 

Feb 10 2014:   62 Lamictal    1.1 Celexa         0.135 Xanax    1.8 Valium

Feb 10 2015:   50 Lamictal      0.875 Celexa    0.11 Xanax      1.5 Valium

Feb 15 2016:   47.5 Lamictal   0.75 Celexa      0.0875 Xanax    1.42 Valium    

2/12/20             12                       0.045               0.007                   1 

May 2021            7                       0.01                  0.0037                1

Feb 2022            6                      0!!!                     0.00167               0.98                2.5 mg Ambien

Oct 2022       4.5 mg Lamictal    (off Celexa, off Xanax)   0.95 Valium    Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet 

 

I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hello,

 

I've read your story and the replies you got. I'm very happy for you to have found this forum which has helped me so much.

 

I would just like to add that although tapering multiple drugs takes quite a long time if you do it properly, you will feel normal as you say throughout the process and won't have to wait for the end of the process to feel well. You will have a good quality of life while tapering if you do it slowly.

 

I understand it when you compare your previous experiences of coming off medication when you did it a lot faster and seemingly without problems. But the longer we are on these meds, the more often we change them and their doses, or stop taking them abruptly - the more difficult it becomes to come off without consequences. That's bad news but I just wanted to explain while your previous experiences may not be valid now.

 

The good news is, as I said, that if you go slow, you will feel reasonably well throughout this process (Rhi and Areyouthere are great examples).

 

Also when you said that you came off drugs before easily but then wrote about deep depression a few months later, this depression was probably the result of a too quick taper.

 

You can do this. You saw that what doctors were telling you didn't make sense and was harming you and came here. You made the most important first step.

 

best,

 

bubble 

Current: 9/2022 Xanax 0.08, Lexapro 2

2020 Xanax 0.26 (down from 2 mg in 2013), Lexapro 2.85 mg (down from 5 mg 2013)

Amitriptyline (tricyclic AD) and clonazepam for 3 months to treat headache in 1996 
1999. - present Xanax prn up to 3 mg.
2000-2005 Prozac CT twice, 2005-2010 Zoloft CT 3 times, 2010-2013 Escitalopram 10 mg
went from 2.5 to zero on 7 Aug 2013, bad crash 40 days after
reinstated to 5 mg Escitalopram 4Oct 2013 and holding liquid Xanax every 5 hours
28 Jan 2014 Xanax 1.9, 18 Apr  2015 1 mg,  25 June 2015 Lex 4.8, 6 Aug Lexapro 4.6, 1 Jan 2016 0.64  Xanax     9 month hold

24 Sept 2016 4.5 Lex, 17 Oct 4.4 Lex (Nov 0.63 Xanax, Dec 0.625 Xanax), 1 Jan 2017 4.3 Lex, 24 Jan 4.2, 5 Feb 4.1, 24 Mar 4 mg, 10 Apr 3.9 mg, May 3.85, June 3.8, July 3.75, 22 July 3.7, 15 Aug 3.65, 17 Sept 3.6, 1 Jan 2018 3.55, 19 Jan 3.5, 16 Mar 3.4, 14 Apr 3.3, 23 May 3.2, 16 June 3.15, 15 Jul 3.1, 31 Jul 3, 21 Aug 2.9 26 Sept 2.85, 14 Nov Xan 0.61, 1 Dec 0.59, 19 Dec 0.58, 4 Jan 0.565, 6 Feb 0.55, 20 Feb 0.535, 1 Mar 0.505, 10 Mar 0.475, 14 Mar 0.45, 4 Apr 0.415, 13 Apr 0.37, 21 Apr 0.33, 29 Apr 0.29, 10 May 0.27, 17 May 0.25, 28 May 0.22, 19 June 0.22, 21 Jun updose to 0.24, 24 Jun updose to 0.26

Supplements: Omega 3 + Vit E, Vit C, D, magnesium, Taurine, probiotic 

I'm not a medical professional. Any advice I give is based on my own experience and reading. 

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Hello everyone and thank you very much for the replies and info.

 

I am at work now, so I cannot write too much.

 

I will add further medication history to my sig when I have a chance - hopefully tonight.

 

I was feeling very down when I wrote my last post.

 

But it's no wonder considering the amount of changes I have made recently.

 

Not many people I have spoken with know much about the benzo etizolam I was taking. I replaced it with Valium a few weeks ago, and since with lorazepam. Perhaps this is why I have been feeling so bad? Perhaps I should stop the lorazepam and occasional Valium for etizolam again? I was able to function ok on etizolam. The higher dose of lorazepam is probably what I need - but that just means I have to taper off a higher dose once I am more stable.

 

I really wish I had not increased cymbalta to 40gm from 20mg just a month ago ..

 

Yes. You guys are right. There is no reason why I cannot live my life while tapering. I have just been in a negative mind state recently.

 

Thanks again everyone.

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

Link to comment

Hi again,

 

I have been thinking about the advise Rhi gave me " better to stick with the day drug you know than the bad drug you don't know"

 

I have had much worse anxiety since stopping etizolam , starting Valium for 2 weeks, and stopping Valium for lorazepam about 9 days ago. The urge to have the occasional Valium due to extreme anxiety is perhaps because the lorazepam dose is too small - and because I'm still having WD from Valium - and etizolam.

 

I'm going to call my doctor about going back on etizolam.

 

Apparently Roserem is non addictive. Can anybody confirm this? ( my doctor made a strong point of this - but I am beginning to doubt much of what he tells me. I did not get severe side effects from ambien. Problem is half of a tablet does not seem to help me sleep in my current state. Perhaps I should go back to one pill?

 

Sorry. I'm in a rush. I will check back later for replies. Thanks in advance.

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

Link to comment

I just called my doctor.

 

He said the dose of etizolum was much higher than usual ( 5 x 1mg per day ) and it is best for me to just put up with the anxiety until it subsides, and stick with the lorazepam.

 

I will also gradually cut out the Valium .

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

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  • Administrator

It sounds like you are experiencing benzo withdrawal syndrome. For some people, the withdrawal symptoms persist. Doctors are in denial about this. They get people addicted and then ignore the withdrawal difficulties.

 

If I were you, I'd ask for a lower dose of etizolam, perhaps 3mg per day, to replace the other benzos and stabilize on the etizolam.

 

Benzo withdrawal is not the focus of this site, though you might look here http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/forum/29-members-only-benzo-tapering-discussion/

 

There are a number of specialized benzo withdrawal groups on Facebook, such as https://www.facebook.com/groups/112449132147409/

 

About Rozerem: The manufacturer claims there are no withdrawal symptoms -- but that's what ALL the drug manufacturers said about ALL psychiatric drugs. Rozerem is prescribed infrequently so information on withdrawal difficulties is scarce. I would count on tapering it.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Thank you Altostrata.

 

I really appreciate the advice you guys are giving me.

 

Benzo withdrawal syndrome? That would explain a lot!

 

I have stopped drinking in the past ( though never accepted that I must stop forever ) and I have felt the benefits within a week or 2. The difference this time is I have been following doctors orders to take Valium and lorazepam instead of etizolam. I have been feeling horrible and actually began to think that I was losing my mind and have had suicidal thoughts.

 

I have also stopped the ambien and started roselen. I was going to bed last night and spent 30minites deciding which sleeping pill I should take. I went with the roselen purely because I was thinking about my doctors words " this medication is NON addictive. This is a very important point for you ".

 

It was VERY hard getting out of bed this morning. Roselen makes me very drowsy. It's a shame, but I feel I may need to go back on the ambien.

 

Yes, I understand this is not a forum for benzos. My aim is to stablelize and then start working on the ADs.

 

It all makes sense now. I should not have been experiencing the things I went through one year after I initially became depressed. The side effects of the medication were the reason I kept taking it.

 

I am now very afraid of the amount of medication I am taking and what is has done to me.

 

It's really tough dealing with the side effects of changing my medication right now, but the positive side is I have found this site with all of you wonderful people .

 

Altostrata ; I called my doctor yesterday and asked about going back on the etizolam . He told me to stay on the lorazepam . He obviously doesn't how I feel. Yes, 3mg per day is the normal dose. I guess I will have to try and convince him.

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

Link to comment

PS: I tried to add more to my signature re: my medication history before bed last night but it was too long. It was time to get some sleep . I'm back working full time now and busy being a nervous wreck a lot of the time, but will edit it with a shorter version soon.

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

Link to comment

Have had very bad Tinnitus for over a week now. It is driving me nuts. I am presuming it is a side effect from changes on medication. I really do feel awful :(

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

Link to comment

Trying to edit my signature again.

 

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft.

 

2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)

 

March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.

 

June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg

 

Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mgCurrently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

 

2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien

 

Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien

 

May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg

 

Jan 2014 double ADs.

 

March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.

 

2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

 

Currently: 0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home.

 

2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.

 

Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet.

 

 

-----

 

Please tell me what I am doing wrong :(

 

Edit: oops! I think my sig must be too long. I made it shorter than the one I did last night, but still to long?

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

Link to comment

Is it ok for me to discuss benzos and sleepers here?

 

I want to reduce my ADs too, but I seriously need to stablelize from the benzo cocktail . I also have to make a decision on sleeping pills.

 

I feel that Roserem does not agree with me . I can't get out of bed and feel drowsy all day.

 

I feel that ambien suited me better - but I am afraid to restart the addiction again.

 

The way I am feeling, I don't feel I could sleep without pills.

 

I had an epizolam today for the first time in 2 weeks. I think I feel less anxious and depressed.

 

I have called my doctor and asked for etizolam again as advised on this forum. I asked for 3mg per day .

 

After starting 2 weeks of Valium a month ago. Changing that to 3x 0.5mg of lorazepam - do I still need to taper from these 2 benzos?

 

The information i am getting here is very different than my doctor tells me.

 

I am now looking over the past 10 years . I remember times I was feeling ok, but because I reduced medicine at the time ( too quickly ) I suffered WD and mistook the WD for a need for medication .

 

10 years of meds have made me worse in many ways. Not to mention the complex I developed from the meds, and the unsocial behavior patterns I have developed.

 

I am very annoyed at the pharmaceutical companies and doctors who have pushed this poison on to me without telling me the consequences of getting addicted.

 

There should be laws in place to educate people on what doctors tell you to put into your body. It is our right to know!

 

I would never have gone back on meds I had managed to stop if I knew what they were doing to me.

 

Right now, I feel suicidal :(

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

Link to comment

I just went to my doctor.

 

He prescribed me 3 x 1mg of etizolam per day.

 

He told me to continue the lorazepam at 2 x 0.5mg per day.

 

Does this sound right?

 

I am feeling very depressed and finding it hard to keep any hope of getting my life back :(

 

I really don't know what to do. I have doctors that just pump me full of poison , and the only other place I can get an educated opinion is here.

 

I feel very lost and feel my future is bleak :(

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

Link to comment

My doctor tells me he will put me on a stronger dose of lorazepam after I have been back on etizolam for a few weeks.

 

I'm already feeling confused about everything.

 

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

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It sounds like you are experiencing benzo withdrawal syndrome. For some people, the withdrawal symptoms persist. Doctors are in denial about this. They get people addicted and then ignore the withdrawal difficulties.

 

If I were you, I'd ask for a lower dose of etizolam, perhaps 3mg per day, to replace the other benzos and stabilize on the etizolam.

 

 

Altostrata, do you think I should stop all other benzos and just stick to Etizolam?

 

My doctor told me otherwise

Jan 2004 - 2008 25-50mg of Zoloft. 2008 - 2011 - Effexor ( sorry, forgot dosage)
March 2011 2 week taper and stop all meds.June 2011 start etizolum (3mg per day ) + mirtazapine 15mg
Sep. 2011 increase mirtazapine to 30mg per day , start cimbalta 20mg
2012 increase cymbalta to 40mg. Etizolam to 4-5 mg + add 5mg ambien
Aug 2012. Taper off ADs over 2 months. Stop. Taking 1mg etizolam and 5 mg ambien
May 2013. Start mirtapine 15 mg & cymbalta 20mg. Increase etizolum to 4-5mg
Jan 2014 double ADs.March 2014. Start 15mg of Valium to Stop alcohol . 2-3mg etizolum. Same ADs.
2weeks later stop etizolam and Valium . Stop ambien.

Currently I take 2 x 20mg cymbalta in the morning.

0.5mg of lorazepam 3 times a day - occasionally 5mg of Valium when I have an exceptionally bad night at home. April 22 take 1 epizolam.
2 x 15mg of mirtazapine in the evening.
Roserem 8mg sleeping tablet for one week. April 19 take Zopiclone instead. 20th half ambien (no sleep) April 21st Roserem. April22 half roserem.

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