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The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization


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#505 Pepita

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Posted 01 May 2017 - 02:17 AM

I can fully confirm the describes waves and windows pattern. Luckily I documented a few month going into WD and when I feel
horroble again and tend to think that this will never end and never gets any better I read some
of my old logs ans can defenitely see an overall improvement. Still I get very frustrated from
time to time when symptoms worsen and I get this feeling of losing so mich time and "wasting" so many years with this very upsetting circumstances. I am about 1,5 years off drugs now. My windows became longer, but my waves are also still quite long-lasting. After going into WS I felt abaolutely horrible for about 6-8 months straight with only hours or days of uplifting. then I had a longer window for 3 months since then its more wavy again and I am sort of desperately waiting for my next window. What I find most upsetting is the total intolerance to ANY sort of stress- be it physical exercise, work or private/family issues. The smalles issues are like huuuuge rocks in my way and I am always hoping that nothing major stressful will soon cross my way. I know no two persons and healing time is the same but among those who have been in longterm protracted withdrawal - does this get sort of significantly better after 3-5 years of waves/windows? or do you aaaaaalways have to walk like on egg shells?

2005-2006: Cipralex 5 mg

2009-2010: Cipralex 5 mg

2012-2015: Cipralex 5mg, 10mg 

tapered 10mg-7.5mg-5mg-2,5-0 (I always waited for a few weeks on the current dosage until I felt stable. Steps were too big I realized too late)

Completely drug free since August 2015


#506 Nena59

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Posted 01 May 2017 - 08:43 AM

 

Thanks guys,
I wish there was a way to get the cortisol out of my system! I hate this.
I also get tingling in my legs and I'm pretty shaky in the morning. I used to love to sleep...sometimes nine hours a night.

Hi Nena59, I'm glad to talk to someone how has came off long term Prozac. I am 10mtha off now and have awful anxiety and tingling, I wake at 5am every morning with crippling anxiety. I would like to start my med again to get rid of this but my system has became so sensitised that I can't tolerate even a tiny dose. Please keep me up to date on how you cope and any methods for the anxiety. I'm having acupuncture which is keeping me health but not helping anxiety. I had reflexology on Fri and was really ill with flu type aches and pain yesterday but that has gone today. Take care. xx

 

Hey Blue bird,

I have a new counselor and he gets all this! He even explained to me how the brain is trying to heal!

Anyway, he got me involved in mediation. There is a free and awesome course called palousemindfullness.com. I have had pretty bad anxiety and after doing this for 5 weeks I think it has helped. I can breathe through the worse most of the time and bring myself out of it. I hope this helps.


20 years of fluoxetine and bupropion. Most recent daily doses: 20 mg and 400 mg, respectively. Quit previously in the late '90s and in 2010 but reinstated after ~6 months. Ceased fluoxetine (Cold turkey...doctors advice). September 2016. Ceased bupropion October 2016 after a four week taper.
 
Extreme fatigue for latter half of October resolving into moderate fatigue and depression with occasional brain zaps and tingling skin. Easier late in the day. Symptoms deepened in February 2017 - more days without any relief.

#507 Nena59

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Posted 01 May 2017 - 11:58 AM

I can fully confirm the describes waves and windows pattern. Luckily I documented a few month going into WD and when I feel
horroble again and tend to think that this will never end and never gets any better I read some
of my old logs ans can defenitely see an overall improvement. Still I get very frustrated from
time to time when symptoms worsen and I get this feeling of losing so mich time and "wasting" so many years with this very upsetting circumstances. I am about 1,5 years off drugs now. My windows became longer, but my waves are also still quite long-lasting. After going into WS I felt abaolutely horrible for about 6-8 months straight with only hours or days of uplifting. then I had a longer window for 3 months since then its more wavy again and I am sort of desperately waiting for my next window. What I find most upsetting is the total intolerance to ANY sort of stress- be it physical exercise, work or private/family issues. The smalles issues are like huuuuge rocks in my way and I am always hoping that nothing major stressful will soon cross my way. I know no two persons and healing time is the same but among those who have been in longterm protracted withdrawal - does this get sort of significantly better after 3-5 years of waves/windows? or do you aaaaaalways have to walk like on egg shells?

Pepita,

I am the same way. I have been waving a lot lately. I'm not as bad or good as in the recent past, I'm more not getting the highs and lows. I get into a window, weak, but a window just the same and something that should be a little stressful comes up and wham, a drop in mood and anxiety. I feel like I should be in a mattress filled room. I'm off for 7 months.


20 years of fluoxetine and bupropion. Most recent daily doses: 20 mg and 400 mg, respectively. Quit previously in the late '90s and in 2010 but reinstated after ~6 months. Ceased fluoxetine (Cold turkey...doctors advice). September 2016. Ceased bupropion October 2016 after a four week taper.
 
Extreme fatigue for latter half of October resolving into moderate fatigue and depression with occasional brain zaps and tingling skin. Easier late in the day. Symptoms deepened in February 2017 - more days without any relief.

#508 Pepita

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Posted 02 May 2017 - 06:16 AM

Hi Nena59, I tried to quote but somehow I always end up quoting everything, including my original Text that you quoted so I am going to stick with @Nena for now:D
wow 20 years of medication (what is it SSRI?) ..that is really a very long time. Off 7 months, congratulations! Even if it feels really horrible - I came to the conclusion that it´s still better if you´re not poisoning your system any more.
I just wished that the healing process would be easier. And more consistent. A few weeks ago I even went to so some freelance work in another office (another than my own where I can luckily work from most of the time)...and now I feel like being back on ground zero.
I mostly stay very positive but DAMN THIS SUCKS! Had to be said once :))


2005-2006: Cipralex 5 mg

2009-2010: Cipralex 5 mg

2012-2015: Cipralex 5mg, 10mg 

tapered 10mg-7.5mg-5mg-2,5-0 (I always waited for a few weeks on the current dosage until I felt stable. Steps were too big I realized too late)

Completely drug free since August 2015


#509 Nena59

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Posted 02 May 2017 - 07:32 AM

Hi Nena59, I tried to quote but somehow I always end up quoting everything, including my original Text that you quoted so I am going to stick with @Nena for now:D
wow 20 years of medication (what is it SSRI?) ..that is really a very long time. Off 7 months, congratulations! Even if it feels really horrible - I came to the conclusion that it´s still better if you´re not poisoning your system any more.
I just wished that the healing process would be easier. And more consistent. A few weeks ago I even went to so some freelance work in another office (another than my own where I can luckily work from most of the time)...and now I feel like being back on ground zero.
I mostly stay very positive but DAMN THIS SUCKS! Had to be said once :))

Pepita, 

So sorry you are not well now.

I took prozac and wellbrutrin. I don't think that I ever really needed them either. I was going through a really tough time in my life and I just needed to ride it out, but I took what I thought was the easy way out. I knew other people that took anti-depressants at the time and just figured that they were safe.

I am really trying to stay positive, thanks for the reminder. :D


20 years of fluoxetine and bupropion. Most recent daily doses: 20 mg and 400 mg, respectively. Quit previously in the late '90s and in 2010 but reinstated after ~6 months. Ceased fluoxetine (Cold turkey...doctors advice). September 2016. Ceased bupropion October 2016 after a four week taper.
 
Extreme fatigue for latter half of October resolving into moderate fatigue and depression with occasional brain zaps and tingling skin. Easier late in the day. Symptoms deepened in February 2017 - more days without any relief.

#510 Pepita

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Posted 02 May 2017 - 10:30 AM

@Nena - same here... I was going through a rough time, both personally and professionally. And it was hard- but nothing, not even close to the hell of withdrawal. Also Inwas inteoduced to SSRI at the age of 18 by a GP after a 10 minutes talk- due to mild panic attacks (which didn't hinder me at my studies), so I sort of was used to dealing with mental issues with medication. This wave came on so strong because my 13 year old cat was diagnosed with a huge tumor and will probably die rather sooner than later. This is a sad situation of course but the way this is hitting me is very very "withdrawal-style" :( and it reminds me of how far I'm still away from being 100% healed.

2005-2006: Cipralex 5 mg

2009-2010: Cipralex 5 mg

2012-2015: Cipralex 5mg, 10mg 

tapered 10mg-7.5mg-5mg-2,5-0 (I always waited for a few weeks on the current dosage until I felt stable. Steps were too big I realized too late)

Completely drug free since August 2015


#511 Jennifer78

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Posted 16 May 2017 - 02:39 PM

I'm co confused about windows and waves. Are windows when you feel healed or when symptoms aren't as bad as the waves? I'm trying to figure out if I've experienced any windows. I know exactly what the waves are, just curious about the definition of windows. I have not experienced a time yet when I feel healed but I've had a few short experiences when the symptoms aren't as bad as they normally are. I might have already asked about this but my memory is awful. Any input is greatly appreciated.
Celexa 40mg stopped taking it 12-01-16
Abilify 10mg stopped 12-01-16
Wellbutrin XL currently taking
I have been on some type of meds for 15 years

#512 Nena59

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Posted 16 May 2017 - 03:03 PM

Jennifer,

Windows happen when you feel better for a time...almost back to normal. I have a hard time with them sometimes, I'm afraid they will go away! Waves are 2/3 of my day lately. I feel anxious sometimes, depressed sometimes, low energy, sad :(. I am just so tired of this! I read the success stories when i get too down. You will get better! Your brain is healing right now!

Nena


20 years of fluoxetine and bupropion. Most recent daily doses: 20 mg and 400 mg, respectively. Quit previously in the late '90s and in 2010 but reinstated after ~6 months. Ceased fluoxetine (Cold turkey...doctors advice). September 2016. Ceased bupropion October 2016 after a four week taper.
 
Extreme fatigue for latter half of October resolving into moderate fatigue and depression with occasional brain zaps and tingling skin. Easier late in the day. Symptoms deepened in February 2017 - more days without any relief.