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☼ manymoretodays: off many years of many medications


manymoretodays

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Thank you brassmonkey!  :)

 

I like mole'........that mexican sauce with chocolate in it.  That just may have sufficed for my steak.........lol..........I think the parties over now.........and yah.......I'm laughing at myself...........  It was a fine birthday!!!  Oh......I still have some Indian(Eastern) food leftovers to finish as well.......and that last chocolate brownie too.  :) :) :)

 

........meanwhile Betsey Ross is doing her self groom and leaving huge piles of cat hair in her wake..........all my responsibilities take time, some take $$$$ as well........I keep telling her........be patient...........hang in there..........you look just fine for a cat........lighten up.........mellow out......... :blink:  :unsure:  :huh:  ^_^  ;)

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Happy to report that me cat is very happy and comfortable after her groom/shave.  Check that one off the list.  I may or may not still take her to the cheap shots place and get her 2 recommended shots up to date.  If I do that........I may be able to up her groom to x2/year............I could then sedate her myself with something from the vet(he won't give me anything for her unless her shots are in order)..........and then get her done at an official groomer.  So........will see.........maybe in Sept.  She is like a much younger and way happier version of herself now.......it's amazing..........the heat and the mats were pretty much bringing her way down.

 

My iron was okay......even up.......so that is good as well.  My regular Doc says stay on the 15mg. of Armour........so I will.  Progesterone good too.  I did call and his assistant is great.........got a call back and all my questions answered.

 

Up real early today.........whoosh.........cat was trying, trying to get me to feed her(she had to be NPO after midnight).........she even went so far as popping open the cupboard where her food is kept.  Also........ear buds and mellow music played loud are quite helpful once the cat is in the box/cage and while traveling with such an arrangement.

 

Oh.......ouuuhhhh.........got to evening yoga last night...........so good.........the stretches.........  My balance is not too bad..........not great.........but for  going to a actual class with an actual educated yoga instructor...........I fared okay.  And wow was it meditative.  I was going to stay and swim but didn't want to break the experience and continued calm that came over me.  Will swim manana.  Helps a lot in the am.  I just need to get on in before the water aerobics gets too loud and echo  ey.  Last time I shared a lane with a Bernie look alike of sorts.  He's an amazing senator who came on the political scene this pre election period who I just Love, love, love (explaining for you international types :mellow: ).  So yah.........I swim with Bernie.......lol.........some swim with the dolphins..........me, a Bernie look alike is a thrill!!!

 

Meteor shower this weekend.  Anybody know which night?  With the daze and fireworks one night here in Paradise.........I fear I may miss them.  Not sure about hiking with the past mayor either.........it's not listed anywhere..........I may have to sleuth around a bit, ask questions of the right peeps who may be in the know.

 

I think that's about it for the past few days........I've been fairly calm overall..........sometimes a bit not fairly calm but holding it together I think.......doing my work, catching up, and learning how to take better care of meself so I can hopefully take better care of others.

 

Next week dentist.  Stay tuned........  only kidding.........   And then to the optometrist finally, I hope that goes well and I don't have to spend like hundreds on glasses or anything.

 

Dr. Grace E. Jackson visit got moved to early October..........they needed to reschedule me.  Works out well though.........more time to be thorough in information and record gathering and clear enough mentally to do that.

 

Meantime.......self study stuff is now in order.........for both my peer certification and nursing.  It must get done.  And I don't know yet........where I am going as far as work goes or what..........  The best about that is............that it IS........and I'm okay with that.  My guidance counselor tells me to just stay........stay for now.........stay with the work I AM doing.

 

Love, peace, healing, and gratitude to you all........

 

mmt

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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The peak of the meteor shower is tomorrow night (8-11-16).  You should start seeing some once it gets dark, but they should really get going around midnight.  All you need is a clear dark sky and a lawn chair so you can look up.  I'm going to try and get out of town a little ways cause it's just too bright here in LA. Hope you get to see some, it could be an amazing show.

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

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Well......with the waxing Gibbous moon........some site said they may be better seen(the Perseid showers) once the moon sets.  Going on a shorter version of the "big hike" I want to do someday.........so will check them out early..........see if I can see them before heading to the trail head.

 

Thanks brassmonkey.  I hope I get to see some too.

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Greek mythology has Perseus as a hero.  So that's cool.  I didn't see the showers but I have seen a lot of heroes......met a few, read a few, and simply admire so many in our midst. 

 

I did see fireworks and my camera captured some just perfectly.

 

My favorite band.....one of them was in town and guess what?  They be back in early November.

 

I could not believe how cool my town daze were.

 

I cannot believe how far I have progressed either. 

 

Down to 39mg.with the oxcarbazepine/trileptal.  I am now using 2 oral syringes to measure my.doses........2.6ml(cc) twice a day does it.  So I do 2 ml.(cc) in one syringe and the .6ml. in another.  Will take it easy for a few days now and the weather seems to be cooperating with my efforts as well.  Overcast and woah......in the 80's..........lovely.  Finish up some bills.  Dream on many pleasant things.  :)

 

Nice Monday here in paradise.

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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I am just going to try for one of those attitude shifts. 

 

4 days out from my 10 percent reduction of the oxcarbazepine/trileptal and I generally feel like crap on a crouton.  Not even sure the 2 are related......the reduction and today's general.....not depression.......just is not fun.  Did the first reduced dose Sunday night and generally recovered my wits most days this week so it can't be that bad.  Today though........ugh.........every concern and it's brother is raising it's hand and wanting my attention.  Trying to be real chill to no avail.  I think my tipping point came with my talk with Mum last night.........but maybe it was the ex's response to my what the feck was he planning with alimony..........of course when I asked via e-mail I did not use the feck word........really it was just the facts of what he has said, left real paper notes on(I cleaned my computer desk yesterday and found those), as well as e-mailed me on.  He seems to think I have hundred's now in ready assets and either the world is going to end real soon or something to that effect........as well as.......I should be glad for his timely advice on selling the house momentarily(and he was NOT the one who planted the seed of me selling the house anyway)...........  I just wanted to know his plan going forward and now I feel like I cannot even depend on the reduced alimony for any length of time and it is freaking me right on out.

 

So my Mum had a nice vacation and seems pretty materialistic and/or fond of folks who have big titles and dress nice at all times and fit into her nice mold of nice people.  And she picks on the associate by phone now.  I'm like great........that is kind of my job to do or not do not hers.  The associate is doing okay though with it.........apparently, so he says.......and finally is activating his new phone.  I guess he is really not my associate anymore, he is just my dear son now.........as he is no longer residing in the recovery, withdrawal, clearance, monastery, sober living home of mine.  He resides with his not so dear Dad close by.

 

I pretty much told the last realtor who really did give me some good tips when he came by quite awhile ago........to no longer contact me via phone or e-mail.......that I would contact him if need be.  My houses tax appraisal amount was more than what he wanted to list it at........so I told him that nicely and that I thought his company had way too much overhead as well.  We parted kind of friendily.  He called on the land line today that I should get rid of for a huge savings of $30 bucks a month.

 

 

So.....sheesh.......another cavity!!  I asked my dentist of a long time........why??  I have not had cavities for decades and guess what he said???  Comeon.........give it a few guesses and I will leave the answer upside down at the bottom of this post.  :)   Ahhhhh, this is helping.........  Maybe I will forget to leave the answer down below on what he said.

 

I just cannot seem to get pen to paper today at all.......nor have I done much more than the basics of hygiene, dressing, eating and stepping on outside a few times.  It is what it is......

 

Kind of waiting for a phone call from my baby shower plannning helper and major coordinator of the thing now........and bummed, just not into it all again........giving a baby shower for the mother to be ?zilla.  It's for the baby!  Totally.  And the kid won't even really be there for the party and food and such...........  Anyway......it's my priority to focus on and I hope she calls soon.......I'll call her in a bit here, when her paid work day is done and get down to my final assignments for this thing........

 

I don't really want to do much more today.......other than grill some burgers and go to bed a bit later and sleep like a baby myself tonight.  Must be the full moon......my sleep has been more broken for a couple now.

 

And I can't figure out what the heck I am doing........too many people in my life.........too many should I do this or that thoughts.

 

I listened to a really great webinar today for an hour and 1/2.  Peer program stuff.........3 people who have done some good work........not alone but with others.......anyway..........that REALLY was a fine part of today.  Maybe will go to some planning meetings soon..........maybe not..........I don't know what I am doing like I said but I am doing okay overall........just not stellar okay.

 

I think that's about it for this post.

 

Patience, peace, and tolerance,

 

mmt

 

p.s.  the dentist just said I am getting old to me.  Well so is he!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I dislike this age thing.  And no, I am not looking forward to the filling........no way, no how........and now I don't even want to go see the optometrist until the filling is done in a couple of weeks and am all $$$$$$$$$$$$$$  ching, ching concerned and want a paying job like yesterday and all that jazz.

 

And yes.....it could be so much worse I know and I just had to write it is all.  I am very, very grateful for all my struggles and do not have illusions of perfection ever.........just a better inner calm at all times.

 

Oh hey,  when getting my teeth cleaned I was able to completely stay chill with meditation and music.  No x-rays done either........my ace, one of a kind hygienist spotted the cavity........she is super!

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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mmt - about cavities at the dentist:  A few years ago, my dental hygienist noticed that something had changed in my mouth. She asked if I had started any new prescriptions. Bingo - Cymbalta.  She gave me samples of dental products that address some of the dry mouth issues. The product line is Biotene, but there are others including "natural" lines. The ones that I like the best are the toothpaste and an oral gel that I smear around my gums and teeth before going to bed.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.
1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results

Cymbalta 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 2016: 20 mg to 7 mg exact doses and dates in this post; 2017: 6.3 mg to  0.0 mg  Aug. 12; details here


scallywag's Introduction
Online spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet

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I'll ask if they notice dryness when I go for the filling.  I sure don't notice dryness is an issue but ???  Thanks scally.  How are you faring?

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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I'm doing alright, feeling a bit flat. I'm probably in a ripple -- can't really call it a wave. <_<

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.
1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results

Cymbalta 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 2016: 20 mg to 7 mg exact doses and dates in this post; 2017: 6.3 mg to  0.0 mg  Aug. 12; details here


scallywag's Introduction
Online spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Kind of a "brother where art thou" kind of day today.........and struggling.  Gratitude that the struggle is not as intense as it once was and feeling sound enough of spirit, mind, and body.

 

A nice couple rounds in the sweat lodge on Sunday.  The baby shower went okay but was terribly sad for several reasons.  The main one being that........yes, there were some rsvp's............but no one showed up at all.  Very sad for another person and I am humbled by my own complaining...........yet.........sometimes life is like that, no one 2 legged creature shows up when we only THINK we really need them to...........  Casper is good and with me always.  On the other side of that coin, my hope lies in the millennials and babies now being born........that this world will one day be a better........oh, so much better place.

 

I am so feeling.......so ready to be put out to pasture somewhere........give it up..........just my previous hopes of anything career or loving relationship with the opposite sex.  I mean just today........just today I feel like that.........so it's okay.

 

Working on getting records for both myself and faxed or sent to Dr. Grace from my psychiatrist.  Hopefully they will copy my credit card there.  That is something that her receptionist told me must be done.........and no, I'm not feeling good about that.  Maybe I can just send cash or a check to them........to be filled in after I arrive there or something.  I don't know.  I may not go.  Just my feeling today.  It's kind of a bleak one........today.  I may just get on out to return a DVD later, get some supplies.........eat.........get clear of this headache.......brush my teeth.......bare minimum.

 

Thanks if you read and yah, keep rooting for me/we.......

 

All my best,

 

mmt

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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.........the baby came on into this world........just heard a little bit ago............ :) :P :D :)

 

(referring to my previous post on baby shower I co-hosted)

 

.......and..........my first attempt at acupressure may have been successful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

I mean who really knows on this stuff........

 

Welcome _______!!!!!  Joy and happiness.

 

mmt

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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MMT.  You sound like you're traveling along really well. I always enjoy seeing what you've been up to. I'm glad you had a positive experience with your acupuncture.  I hope your progress continues.  :) 

Ali

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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It was acupressure AliG.  I applied it to my friends tight pregnant abdomen with a gentle but firm hand and told the kid to come on out soon..........thus saving her from induction of labor by drug.  It worked.  She had the kid the next day!!

 

I haven't heard the details yet but am fairly certain they don't induce labor on Sundays.  She had a scheduled appointment for that in a couple of weeks I think.

 

Who knows though......I choose to believe what I believe if it makes me feel like a better friend.

 

I'm not home yet as far as healing goes and all that.........but having more fun with it..........most of the time.

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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This is just a note to myself.  To write a bit more about when I went into my Shrinks office the other day.........for a release of records........and asking for a copy of my records for myself.  And what the receptionist said.  And I do really like N., the receptionist...........   And then what I said.  And then how the other Shrink or psychologist or someone sitting behind the plexiglass with N. smiled and seemed to agree with me.

 

Anyway.......maybe that's it.  What I needed to write about here.  It was empowering!  Healing!

 

.........and an hour and a half until I go get my filling...........gonna walk.........I am gonna take a nice morning walk!

 

Kind of a thank you G-d, Great Mysterious Creator of All Living Things/Jesus/Casper it's friday type feeling right now..........

 

mmt

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Thanks for posting about your recent discussion with your dentist in my thread. I'll be interested to hear your experience with the biotene sample.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.
1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results

Cymbalta 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 2016: 20 mg to 7 mg exact doses and dates in this post; 2017: 6.3 mg to  0.0 mg  Aug. 12; details here


scallywag's Introduction
Online spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet

Link to comment
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Also.........excellent talk that anyone can listen to..........I think can be found at his site, Will Hall........Mad in America?..........

 

The talk can be accessed on his FB page as well.  Will Hall.  The recording highlights  Dina Taylor at the 2016 Integrative Medicine for the Underserved Conference in SoCal.   

 

Will also speaks on the recording and a ? and answer session at the end.  Safe, harm reduction approach to coming off meds. is briefly mentioned..........a 5% reduction.  More on that in written form at the Icarus Project.

 

This is not the main focus of the talk.  The safe coming off of meds. if that conclusion is reached for an individual.   The talk/recording itself sure hit home with me today............and...........another hour earned for my peer certification........another step in my steps..........commences..........

 

Yes, life is good.  Spiritual growth wished for us all.  Continued growth.  Recovery.  Service.  Unity.

 

mmt...........(I like being a weekend warrior who has ceased all battles)

 

p.s.  Moderators, feel free to edit or remove if somehow I have violated any guidelines here.

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Nope, mmt, all your info is good. :)  If you'd like to post a link to the video, feel free.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.
1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results

Cymbalta 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 2016: 20 mg to 7 mg exact doses and dates in this post; 2017: 6.3 mg to  0.0 mg  Aug. 12; details here


scallywag's Introduction
Online spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet

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http://www.madnessradio.net/audio-extra/DinaTyler-SpiritCommunityPsychosis-IM4US-8-2016.mp3

 

Okay, here is the link(I think) to an audio recording of Dina Taylor's talk/presentation at the Integrative Medicine for the Underserved Conference in SoCal in 2016. 

 

If my linkage did not work try going to www.madnessradio.net/audio.

 

It was an excellent and inspirational talk for me to listen to.

 

Thank you Will Hall and Dina Taylor!

 

(I think it came through!!!!)

 

A little more about the content 2 posts up.

 

:)

 

mmt

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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This is just a note to myself.  To write a bit more about when I went into my Shrinks office the other day.........for a release of records........and asking for a copy of my records for myself.  And what the receptionist said.  And I do really like N., the receptionist...........   And then what I said.  And then how the other Shrink or psychologist or someone sitting behind the plexiglass with N. smiled and seemed to agree with me.

 

Anyway.......maybe that's it.  What I needed to write about here.  It was empowering!  Healing!

 

.........and an hour and a half until I go get my filling...........gonna walk.........I am gonna take a nice morning walk!

 

Kind of a thank you G-d, Great Mysterious Creator of All Living Things/Jesus/Casper it's friday type feeling right now..........

 

mmt

 

So anyway......on this.  Good old N. tried to tell me that he would have to check with Dr. J on getting me copies of my records.  And his rationale was that there may be some therapeutic notes from my longer appointments with her in the past(well over a year ago now) that she may not want to release to me.  I did not even have to take a couple breaths or walk away before saying something like........"Well.....N., I am the most important person in this particular treatment team and I do not believe that my psychiatrist should be with holding any of her impressions of me or diagnoses or be secretive with any of her impressions.  That just would not be healthy for me or for our relationship in my recovery/healing.  And N., I don't think you have had the experience I have had, nor do you know just how it can be/feel sometimes and I do know many who have had it so very much worse than I."  

 

Oh yah.....she is out of the country until Sept. anyway.......her annual trip home.  She really is a good egg.

 

And I have......perhaps I should send them an e-mail to this effect as well.........I have assured her, Dr. J., that I would never take legal action against her.........or any of that kind of thing.  That just is not me and would not give me any health benefit at this time.  Besides, she has only seen me again for a period of several years of the 28 or so that I have been treated as a disease and given varying diagnoses du jour to fit the prescription. 

 

So okay.....that's that about that.  I do have copies of her notes from when she was my psychiatrist years ago and.......in all honesty........they are not that helpful to me and sometimes were even incorrect in the information that I gave her and that she then recorded.........mostly around medications that I was on........  I mean I think that was the case......

 

All I can really hope for is a very rough outline, once I get it done, of my history with medications for 28 years or so.  I am not even going to bother with hospital records or that one guy who used to practice in my area.  Woah......the things I have learned.  Woah.  And a couple others.........as......for me............it just isn't worth the busy it would all take.  Got better things to do right now.

 

I will however, try my best, I promise to make a dent........something, anything that will lead to better mental health care in the future, as well as increased awareness of psych prescription drug realities.  Realistic disclosures as to the risks.......not just on paper......choices, alternatives, etc.   

I do believe it is possible.  I believe in better mental health care going forward.

 

Meanwhile......just being me......passive expressive in a good way.......good enough way.

 

Thanks for reading.  And thanks for that term........passive expressive.........I think it came from someone here or a link........I know not.

 

mmt

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Thanks for stopping by my thread. It sounds like a lot of good things are going on for you at the moment--though I know not all easy.

 

What kind of meditation retreats are you interested in? All the ones I've done have been silent, in Theravada tradition of Buddhism, which is what I'd be looking at now too. The best place to look used to be Inquiring Mind, but just found out it is no longer in publication. I don't know anything about retreats in your area, but I imagine you could do some searches to find some. I'm focusing on places close to home, where I can drive and thereby, bring my own food. The one I'm looking at right now is very close by.  It's a 6 day retreat, that costs $300 if I commute from home and don't stay there or about $500 if I do. That includes meals too, but there is also a donation to teachers and retreat staff at the end.

 

The thing about trauma is that only a few of the meditation teachers I've worked with have any idea how to support people when it arises. Without support, it can easily become re-traumatizing. Been there, done that, and don't choose to repeat it. I haven't yet been on a longer retreat where trauma didn't come up. I think there are things about the conditions of retreats themselves that evoke it. So, I still question if this is the best thing for me or not. But I find such a longing for the silence, the community that develops, and a chance to work more deeply than can happen at home.

 

Good for you on taking a trip of sorts. I think getting away can provide a change in perspective..as well as giving some confidence on stepping out of the comfort zone a little. Hope you enjoy it.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Thanks freespirit.  I'm just looking at a $25.00 donation for a Native American Spirit Dance.  I hope it's a good investment.  Not silent but I expect chunks of time within each day where silence is more the norm.  Maybe some singing......not sure.........I will find out then.  In nature........a most beautiful setting so it should be fine.  I don't know.........seems to be helping a lot.  Native American spiritual and ceremony.    I have done some precursory Buddhism with my Shrink and once out at her ?Temple but only for an hour at a time.  I think the place at one of my nearby cities that was once available is no longer an option........not sure.........I will ask when I do my hopefully exit interview.  It was right in the heart of the city though........both places.........so, a bit difficult to really see either as a full immersion retreat.  

 

Therapy yesterday and each month hereafter.  She's a keeper.  A good mirror for where I am at.  And her feedback is always appreciated.  And her concern........if it was even that.........I don't think it was...........she had some tears when I thanked her for getting me through last winter and we honestly do have more work to be done together. 

 

How does one "support" past trauma?  I think that's a good question for me to at least ponder for awhile.........not sure of any great truths in the answer.......if there is an answer..........for all.  For me.......I think.........yes, sometimes I do think............my own partial answer for me would be to do everything I can within reason to make sure that it stops affecting my present actions and thoughts...........with help, of course.  With help.  What that means for any other individual I do not know.  I think I do know what that means for me..........kind of a combination of faith/spirit help and understanding humans, including myself.

 

Other stuff.......meditations and all............some of this online stuff hits the spot and movement..........any kind really seems to......... if not help eliminate patterns.........at least allow me to visit the trauma in a safe way, a kind way, a beneficial way.  Some art too..........I have to laugh.........I managed to get my toenails painted anyway..........some writing done...........not sure if I will finally tile around my fireplace or paint bathroom ceilings first............with some of that mildew/mold resistant paint...........perhaps new fans installed too(seriously will consider a paid handyman for that one).

 

Wisdom Wednesday again......ha........sort of...........somebody is drilling nearby and it is most definitely time for my earbuds.......  I think I will do most of my inane errands today in the evening hours.

 

Good for me to keep on switching it up........the way I do things............this brief discomfort when out of my old comfort zone.

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Rain.  A little rain off and on has been nice.  It seems to just come on and then quit in short segments.  I sure like it though.  The smell.  The sound.

 

Another long weekend here and I thought the neighbors were having another family reunion.  Nope.  Must have been just a meeting or something.  Soooo......that was nice.  People around here sure re-une with family a lot, especially in the summer.  I think it can lead to lot's of acting out for some.  When they all get together and someone is carrying grudges on someone else and maybe jealous or who knows what and..........anyway............I am pretty grateful that I don't have some large extended family reunion to go to every summer a couple of times.  I like my family........it's just when we do that reunion thing or when we did we all had to travel and stay in the same condo and........well.........I'm sure you get the picture.  There is a bigger family one that I used to get mail on..........that one sounds interesting........  Maybe someday.  My own bio family though.........it's really just me I think.........but all of our earlier roles return........and it's kind of funny really..........I always want to like run away again.  I didn't really run away.  I just moved across the country for my first job long ago.  I sure did not wish to go back home and live there though.  Sharing a bed with my sister or even a room with her is pretty crazy making too.  Makes me wonder how we used to do that???!!!!  All 3 of us in one room and then 2 of us and we had a lot of space divisions and all that..........we were arch enemies for a long time.......... <_< :blink: :wacko:   I think we patched things up though........yesterday......LOL.......no, a decade or two ago.

 

Moral of this rambling.  Happy labor day.......do not work too hard...........skip the family reunion...........enjoy..........oh, steer clear of the bogus "sales" everywhere too. 

 

I am smiling because I had a good start to the weekend yesterday and lovely surprise.

 

2 8 hour days next week of a training but......yay!........a chunk of hours for one of my CEU requirements.

 

Thanks everyone.  Your good intentions for healing are working.

 

mmt

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Let's see

Patriots day

And I think they won!

Hail, rain, and once again a clean car

Thunder and lightening

Outside anyway

Hopefully some deep water for the plants that are thirsty

 

Depression?

Melancholy?

No.......I think not

Just a bit of that spiritual bankruptcy and unbalance

 

Vocational rehab said they have my back

I think that was the gist

Could travel perhaps

If I got the odd job that sounds intriguing

After doing their abnormal personality test

Okay, I don't know but will look into

And.......maybe get paid for getting a bit more computer savvy

 

ASL sounds interesting and marketable for some chump change perhaps

.........Yoga instructor, Ski instructor

All these choices

Not complaining

 

Got down to $13.00 on the 13th

However, it was not on a friday

 

Then in the mail comes perhaps another choice with pension??!!

 

And how time flies on this.......was early morning

I think I will dance soon

For all of us

 

Love, peaceful, pretty content

Thankful for my struggles

Going to change the rest, G-D willing

 

mmt

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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I'll see what manana brings.  So far........I apologize........ as I am mired in self pity and may skip the dance.  I am the most excellent monk however.........whatever that means..........

 

My great fear of being well has returned.

 

Hoping to mow the lawn tomorrow.  Heck, maybe do the floors and fill the trash bin with stupid stuff.........  Maybe can make donations of other stuff next week.

 

Oh, how I struggle sometimes so un directed......

 

mmt

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Okay.......better.........slow and steady like a turtle.  Right e o.  I expect I will be at least a few days late for my own funeral.  Will be traveling with much care.........soon enough.  Oh, and not to my funeral in case anyone was alarmed.

 

:mellow: :wub: :)

 

mmt

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Got out of town........returned early though..........after leaving late.........pfffft..........these things happen.  Was good though....... :)

 

I forgot........can you believe it........forgot my oxycarbazepine completely(including mixing supplies,etc.)...........more likely just got overlooked as I gathered camping gear and all to go......   Soooo........I missed a couple doses.

 

I got home and just decided to do one of the 2 week interval........10 percent decreases.  I considered just staying off of it from the previous 37.5 mg. dose but was feeling a bit obsessive about it all so...........well..........there you have it.........

 

mmt

 

p.s.  doing okay tonight, a little bit frazzled and unfocused last night and the early part of today though..........thankful for support and friendships locally...... :) 

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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MMT.   You are doing great  !  :)  Sending much love and light. 

Alison

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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Thank you Alison.  And received........much love and light.  Just living the life........it's a good life........

 

Sending some your way too.......much love and light.

 

Daylight getting shorter.  Hit a small critter the other night/morning and so.......a small car repair..........again........always something........the fog lights still work but the plastic stuff around them got a teeny bit mangled.........and I needed to get some more brake fluid put in anyway.........  And do a bit of getting ready for winter type things.  And cleaning, organizing, ridding of un needed stuff.  Man, me and my stuff.........not necessarily baggage anymore........just stuff.  I sure don't need it all forever though........ :mellow: :(

 

The colors are beautiful in some spots.  The larger critters and birds remain.  And woah........crickets!!!  Jiminey Cricket(? spelling....and old disney cartoon character)!!!!!!  It's just that I hear them now.

 

Are you heading into Spring now.......or Summer??  I feel like I AM traveling alot..........while only in the same State and all..........and hope........sure hope I can get to the point where I can plan a bigger trip.  This adventure........this journey...........all good tonight.

 

Loved your last post on your introduction.  And yeah..........celebrate..........healing/recovery..........whatever you want to call it.............

 

Thank you for the encouragement and always being here when it has gotten tough........

 

Love, manymoretodays

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Well...........I just don't know..........whether to keep my appointment with Dr. Grace..........or not.   I was all set to call and reschedule today and then it just did not happen.  It will be an expense but maybe........just go see her and back and then my Mum in February when I need the sunshine badly...........or something to that effect........maybe for a holiday.

 

I also think I may have forgot to remix my oxcarbazepine after 3 days........which may have affected me somewhat.  Pffft..........so, it's kind of a slow go today.  Headache and then some asleep foot and tingly hand stuff.......exhausted, and a few tears and blank brainage.   The up and out and all that goes with that is still a habit though.........so that is grace.  Just more sluggish.  Waning hope.  Those kind of symptoms.  But not so severe as it once was.  Oh......and bill time, always such a fun, fun, time of month for me.........with the added pleasure of going to the bank by the end of the working week to refinance my furnace and A/C loan at a hopefully lower percentage.

 

Therapy was good.  She is a peach or pearl or something that I still need/want and is helpful.  Maybe it's going to be a day on and a day off for a bit.  I just have to wait and see what the morning brings and then plan my day accordingly.  More jobs hitting my inbox........that I find it very difficult not to at least apply for........but I do need to wait.........this I know without a doubt...........wait, be patient,  keep going, be real thankful for so many more things and manymoretodays.

 

I did get pampered and went on out to get my hair colored and trimmed last night.  Even at my age.........and as wonderful as the head massage and aromas are.......it takes me a day or two after to adjust and adapt to that minor change.  Sheesh.  It came out good and we laughed and visited, as always.......caught up with the Stars too.........LOL.......reading People Magazine and all.

 

And sooooo..........all is well enough.  Now is where it is at.  The cat has finally calmed down.........she just has been on a meow streak..........I don't know where Minor Tom is...........I'm hoping they decided to let him in.  Word is that there is one neighbor not so fond of wandering cats.  The deer are sparse again.......hunting season and they are smart enough I hope that the fittest survive or they only get shot by folks that use the meat and all.........or something.  The quail are doing some roof work for me it appears.

 

And me, I ramble on..........I am going to get some sleep now and dream about when I reduce to 30mg. of the oxcarb and how well that will go.........and all the places I have yet to see and people I will meet and my boy being free from struggles and being all totally independent and cool and..........(insert happy dreams here)

 

Thanks everyone........especially Alto and mods and especially those sharing experiences and just this whole gift of a life that I have..........it's good.

 

Love,

 

manymoretodays

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Thank you Alison.  And received........much love and light.  Just living the life........it's a good life........

 

Sending some your way too.......much love and light.

 

Daylight getting shorter.  Hit a small critter the other night/morning and so.......a small car repair..........again........always something........the fog lights still work but the plastic stuff around them got a teeny bit mangled.........and I needed to get some more brake fluid put in anyway.........  And do a bit of getting ready for winter type things.  And cleaning, organizing, ridding of un needed stuff.  Man, me and my stuff.........not necessarily baggage anymore........just stuff.  I sure don't need it all forever though........ :mellow: :(

 

The colors are beautiful in some spots.  The larger critters and birds remain.  And woah........crickets!!!  Jiminey Cricket(? spelling....and old disney cartoon character)!!!!!!  It's just that I hear them now.

 

Are you heading into Spring now.......or Summer??  I feel like I AM traveling alot..........while only in the same State and all..........and hope........sure hope I can get to the point where I can plan a bigger trip.  This adventure........this journey...........all good tonight.

 

Loved your last post on your introduction.  And yeah..........celebrate..........healing/recovery..........whatever you want to call it.............

 

Thank you for the encouragement and always being here when it has gotten tough........

 

Love, manymoretodays

Hi Manymoretodays.  It must have been a " purple " day . LOL.  :)

 

We are in Spring, right now. It's a beautiful time of the year. The jasmine is out and it's sunny most days without being sweltering hot. Summer is the time for that kind of heat.(December - February).

 

I know what you mean about the stuff. How quickly it accumulates ! I'm hoping to do a " Spring clean" and pare things down a bit. De- clutter and find that " Zen " feeling again hopefully.

 

I do hope you get to do a bit of traveling at some point. I would like to do some more soon, too. It's one of my passions.

 

I post of my recovery mainly to show it's possible and give hope. There were times even I wasn't sure that it would happen. 

 

I hope I have helped you in some small way. That's what this is all about. Shared experiences.

Hugs,

Ali

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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End of the month for my appt. with Dr. Grace.........hopefully.  The biggest pitfall really is the pricetag.......not so much for the travel but for the appointments.........as well as the fact that she is a psychiatrist(that is her specialty).

 

?Loan brilliant idea........not as brilliant after my meeting at the bank........still possible but needs further understanding by me and looking for all my options.

 

Yoga stellar this week!  And something new to try next week........along the meditative lines...........

 

These and manymoretodays........lol........ :)

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

 

Thank you Alison.  And received........much love and light.  Just living the life........it's a good life........

 

Sending some your way too.......much love and light.

 

Daylight getting shorter.  Hit a small critter the other night/morning and so.......a small car repair..........again........always something........the fog lights still work but the plastic stuff around them got a teeny bit mangled.........and I needed to get some more brake fluid put in anyway.........  And do a bit of getting ready for winter type things.  And cleaning, organizing, ridding of un needed stuff.  Man, me and my stuff.........not necessarily baggage anymore........just stuff.  I sure don't need it all forever though........ :mellow: :(

 

The colors are beautiful in some spots.  The larger critters and birds remain.  And woah........crickets!!!  Jiminey Cricket(? spelling....and old disney cartoon character)!!!!!!  It's just that I hear them now.

 

Are you heading into Spring now.......or Summer??  I feel like I AM traveling alot..........while only in the same State and all..........and hope........sure hope I can get to the point where I can plan a bigger trip.  This adventure........this journey...........all good tonight.

 

Loved your last post on your introduction.  And yeah..........celebrate..........healing/recovery..........whatever you want to call it.............

 

Thank you for the encouragement and always being here when it has gotten tough........

 

Love, manymoretodays

Hi Manymoretodays.  It must have been a " purple " day . LOL.  :)

 

We are in Spring, right now. It's a beautiful time of the year. The jasmine is out and it's sunny most days without being sweltering hot. Summer is the time for that kind of heat.(December - February).

 

I know what you mean about the stuff. How quickly it accumulates ! I'm hoping to do a " Spring clean" and pare things down a bit. De- clutter and find that " Zen " feeling again hopefully.

 

I do hope you get to do a bit of traveling at some point. I would like to do some more soon, too. It's one of my passions.

 

I post of my recovery mainly to show it's possible and give hope. There were times even I wasn't sure that it would happen. 

 

I hope I have helped you in some small way. That's what this is all about. Shared experiences.

Hugs,

Ali

 

 

Of course, without a doubt, Ali..........you have helped me in a big way.  Yah........the stuff.  It is what happens when one lives in the same place for almost a quarter of a century.  Wow!!!  And then I had this job for several years at a antique/junk store where my pay was merchandise.  I have a lot of cool things and unfinished projects.  It sure does feel like that time of year to pick one or two...........projects.........and have a go at them.  Try my hand at tiling around the fireplace I think.  And stitch up a quilt/comforter for a baby that I am fond of.

 

Jasmine again!!  I remember the mention of Jasmine last year.  Fall here and colorful..........although, I can't seem to capture much of the color on my camera.........not the way I am seeing it.........I am taking a few more pictures.  I like to do that.  It's getting cooler too and even more of that shift in a day of temperatures.........sometimes a whole 30 degrees Celsius from early am to mid afternoon.  This is NOT hormones.

 

Thank you for the note on my intro.  You are loved and appreciated by many.

 

manymoretodays

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Reduced the oxcarbazepine/trileptal another 10 percent Sunday night(30mg. total in a day, split into 2 doses)........soooo.........about a day and 1/2 into it.  And oof to the moof.  More dramatic weather change as well as far as the lower temperatures go, and rain...........I do see some blue out there now though........feeble yay.

 

The broken sleep last night was tough to this mornings ache pretty much all over.   The tears.  The "I just don't give a damn anymore".  Thankfully, caught up with enough of life, my life, for today and so will take it real easy.........sip a lot of tea..........probably one errand a bit later.  Hopefully a long early nap as well.  Drag myself through a bath or shower.......yoga hug or hug a tree.......

 

Oof........yet thankful.........closer to the end of this last.......oh so stupid medication, that I suggested almost 2 years ago.  Just about time for my morning dose too.......thankful for that.........especially if it provides no relief...........kind of weird thinking perhaps..........perhaps not...........just as long as "this present state" doesn't last more than a week or so in intensity.  I've got the chills too right now.

 

Nice sweat lodge this past weekend.  Reacted to some Sage behind my ear though.......a seed maybe or else the sharp stem poked my ear or something........have to laugh about that this.  It is just localized and oozing a bit, clear fluid.......no real signs of infection.  I think the chills are just me needing sleep.  Zzzzzzzzz morning.

 

mmt

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Oh hey........I canceled the appointment with Dr. Grace Jackson towards the end of last week.  I was scheduled for later this month.   Unfortunately finances and state of my mind right now just won't allow for it.  Also.......pretty unclear on what she could possibly offer for my further healing/recovery right now.  That old adage comes to mind of "too many cooks can spoil the soup" or something like that........  I really feel like I am doing okay.......par for the course that I am on right now........learning to leave some things behind.........learning about myself in general and what needs to go............growing stronger every day..........faith, hope, and all that........not on my own anymore.  No special one person...........yet :) ........or maybe never, either way.........good enough for me/we.  Most definitely not back where I started.  So much......almost too much to be grateful for.

 

Sheesh you guys........wish me luck getting my act together.........some have tos to be done as far as my credentials and service..........priorities, etc., and my ever peaceful home here.

 

Love, peace, kind, comfort,

 

manymoretodays.........yes there are.......many more todays.......most grateful for this...........

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Hi MMT-- it sounds like things have taken a good turn for the better.  I'm so glad things are improving.  Best of luck for continued success.

 

(((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))

 

Brass

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

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No......really not so great.  Got my 5 hours of sleep though.  Still up way too early. 

 

Pay a couple bills online today.  Eat.  Maybe do some housework or yardwork.  I may have to let the credentials go.  Cash in some retirement(IRA).

 

How does that saying go......"after pride cometh the fall or something". 

 

All I know for sure is the kind of person I won't be anymore, if that makes sense, the kind of person I just can't be anymore......

 

Meanwhile......I grieve I suppose.

 

Thanks for the hugs Brass.  Thanks for stopping by my intro.

 

manymoretodays.........thankful for that........many more todays.........hour by hour and breath by breath.........will hug a tree and myself when the sun comes up.

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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