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SquirrellyGirl: Effexor withdrawal etc


SquirrellyGirl

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HI Brassmonkey - thanks for the well wishes! I ended up getting a tetanus booster a couple of days later, and that has given me more grief than the wound!

 

I had a fun three day weekend attending a herding dog clinic.  Again, sort of surprised by how I felt during the whole thing since it was with an instructor I have history with, not such great history, but we were mutually willing to let the past go and move forward.  I felt at peace, present, able to take everything in without judgement, and just enjoy the process.  In the past, I would have been intimidated by my instructor (I had an inferiority complex and would put authority figures on a pedestal and then be socially anxious), been uncomfortable when conversation with others would peter out, etc., but I hung in there and didn't let stuff bother me.  

 

So, I have been feeling great and so did a 10% cut of the mirtazapine on Sunday night.  So far so good.  Holding on the venlafaxine (29.25 mg).

 

In the spring when I was still suffering so much from the venlafaxine WD without realizing it, I started seeing a therapist who introduced me to Emotional Brain Training, a program you do online but with weekly phone in groups with a coach, daily phone check ins with your group members, and online work.  I delved into this like a fiend because I was suffering so much.  I saw my therapist all summer and ended up feeling she was less helpful than the EBT she recommended by September, so have stopped seeing her.  When I first started seeing her I was soooo bad, she was of the mind that I needed the drugs badly when I went on mirt and then reinstated the venlafaxine.  She encouraged me to see the p-doc they had at their office, but it took time to get in with him.  I saw him once before I learned about WD, and he wanted me to up the venlafaxine, already doing what every p-doc does regardless of your symptoms:  raise the dosage!  He had also mentioned trying other drugs if needed, especially given my sexual side effects.

 

Well, when I learned about WD and told my therapist, she said I should stabilize for about five years, keep seeing the new guy, because I was so bad without the drugs!  Well, I began to lose respect for her at that point.  After all, it was her husband, the psychologist in their office that did the ADD testing I pursued when WD was making me think I had ADD, who said I didn't have ADD but the good news was there were medications that would make me feel normal, given I had depression, GAD and OCD!

 

That was a tough sentence, sorry LOL!  At any rate, I have seen that p-doc a couple of times since for med checks and told him I wanted off the meds and that I was tapering. He said it was OCD that I was measuring my meds and taking the taper so slowly!

 

In the meantime, listening to Eckhart Tolle, doing guided meditations and continuing with the EBT has done the most good for me.  I feel more at peace, able to let things roll by that used to get my ire, negativity and judgement up.  I have even fallen away from the EBT somewhat because I just don't feel so intensely needy!

 

So, that leaves me wondering, is it the drugs I'm still on that are settling me, or is it that I have truly rewired my brain to some degree?  I simply don't know!  I think it is probably the latter.

 

I have lost faith in the doctors.  Even the other one I had seen, the DO p-doc who was somewhat anti-med, disappointed me by putting me, a recovering bulimic, on a drug that causes you to gain weight!  I have gained back seven pounds and am not happy about it.  Frankly, I don't care as much as I would have in the past, but it still ticks me off because I don't fit my clothes comfortably now and am having to dig out the fat pants.  That is what has made doing a slow taper off the mirtazapine very difficult; I have been tempted to make bigger cuts, but have resisted temptation...

 

Anyway, I guess I still need to see the p-doc just to get med refills while I taper, but I am not looking forward to his attitude about taking it so slow for the next med check.  I feel like telling him he should spend some time on MadInAmerica!  Of course, I am too shy to actually do that.  That is something I wish I could do better, speak my mind!

 

I feel a little guilty about falling away from the therapist and EBT.  I feel that WD neuro-emotions aren't really to be addressed by therapy, though god knows I have/had plenty enough issues to work on pre-med and during!  I still do daily check ins with my EBT group members, and really enjoy the social connection. I would say that's the most valuable part of the program, really. Otherwise, I have really fallen away from doing the online work.  I am thinking of taking a break from EBT for awhile, since it does cost $220/mo, and no one can stop me from continuing to make phone connections with my check in buddies while I do so.

 

Ironically, one of my check in buddies was someone going through WD, and she very artfully planted the idea in my mind that I had been in WD since going off of venlafaxine last year!  She came to the program because of the distress she was in due to WD, and once she started having substantial windows, she too fell away from EBT.

 

I am still not working and am currently not in a position of needing to, since my husband's job is currently stable and he is not pressuring me, understands I need to keep stress low. I have taken a couple of dog-training clients, and have taken a couple of steps to start a business again, but I have not yet ramped up the motivation to really get it going.  Motivation is still hard to come by, though I did get a lot done yesterday!  My hobby is herding dog training, and I have taken on a few students there as well, all fun and low stress, so that is good.  However, if I find myself HAVING to get working, I am sure that will open up a whole new need for therapy!

 

I feel that everything happened the way it did for a reason, starting up with a therapist who had worked the EBT program and so introduced me to it, and me then connecting with someone who was in AD WD, opening that door for me.  Shoot, had this not happened (starting with the ADD testing with the therapist's husband!), I would probably be well on my way to having new drugs tried on me, thinking that I had a brain with a chemical imbalance that needed ADs the way diabetics need insulin!

 

I would say that the worst WD I have run into since tapering is the burning lips/tongue/skin sensation (neuropathy?) which comes and goes and has subsided for now, periodic night sweats, occasional anger flares, headaches, mild waves of general anxiety that are very short, and restless sleep.  Magnesium glycinate at bedtime has helped the last greatly.

 

So, that's my update for now.  Just thought I'd check in while things are going well for a change :-)

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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In the meantime, listening to Eckhart Tolle, doing guided meditations and continuing with the EBT has done the most good for me.  I feel more at peace, able to let things roll by that used to get my ire, negativity and judgement up.  I have even fallen away from the EBT somewhat because I just don't feel so intensely needy!

 

So, that leaves me wondering, is it the drugs I'm still on that are settling me, or is it that I have truly rewired my brain to some degree?  I simply don't know!  I think it is probably the latter.

 

 

 

Hi SG

I have been doing guided meditations too (with Jon Kabut Zinn)  I really think they are helping me too - to try not to engage in the negative rumination and low mood when it happens. 

 

I have wondered too about whether it is drugs or growth, but in my heart I know that it is the drugs....I think the rewiring from meditation and thought changing does happen but it is slow - our best chance at getting off and staying well is to combine slow, slow, slow reductions that give our brains time to remodel back to premedication days and then the meditation helps to show us how our thought processes got us into trouble in the first place!

Started in 2000 - On 150mg most of the time, (but up to 225mg at highest dose for 6 months in the beginning)
Reduced off easily first time - but got depressed (not too much anxiety) 6 months later
Back on effexor for another 9 months.
Reduced off again with no immediate w/d - suddenly got depressed and anxious ++ again 3 or 4 months later.
Back on effexor - this time for 3 years
Reduced off over a month - 6 weeks later terrible anxiety - back on.
Rinse and repeat 4 more times - each time the period before the anxiety comes back got shorter and shorter
Jan - July 2012 75mg down to 37.5mg;, 8/3/12 - 35mg. 8/25/12 - 32mg. 9/11- 28mg, 10/2 - 25mg, 10/29 - 22mg, 11/19 - 19.8mg; 12/11 - 17m,
1/1- 15.5mg; 1/22 -14mg, 2/7 14.9mg, 2/18 - 17.8mg - crashed big time: back to 75mg where i sat for 2 years....

4th  March 2015 - 67.5mg;   31st March - 60mg;  24th April - 53mg; 13th May - 48mg; 26th May - 45mg;  9th June - 41mg; 1 July- 37.5mg; 20 July - 34mg; 11 August - 31mg; 1st Sept - 28mg;  1st Dec - 25.8mg;  28th Dec - 23.2mg; 23rd Jan-21.9mg; Feb 7th- 21mg; March 1st - 20.1mg, March 30th - 18mg

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Hmm, it is possible I am feeling dampened from the drugs, but also I have really been influenced by the notion that I don't HAVE to feel bad! My "problems" just don't feel like a big deal anymore.  When I was in the venlafaxine WD, I was terrified of the future, terrified of getting older, terrified of being alone in my old age, terrified of what will become of the planet with climate change, etc, but that was neuro-emotions, and I had never felt such fear before in my life, before or during drugs!

 

That's what's so awful about neuro-emotions - it's hard to be reasoned with when you are having them!  The best thing for me at that time was to be distracted.

 

Whatever the case, I feel like I have a whole lot more in my arsenal to work on the issues that led me to drugs :-)

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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Hi Squirellygirl,

 

Sounds like things are going okay for you (or as much as they can be during w/d).  I like reading about the different ways people are coping with their underlying issues.  I heard a thing on the radio this morning which I liked.  It was a quote by someone (can't remember who) saying how strange that we all feel alone when in fact the world is full of people who are experiencing the same griefs, hardships, traumas as we are.  

 

Hugs,

KarenB

2010  Fluoxetine 20mg.  2011  Escitalopram 20mg.  2013 Tapered badly and destabilised CNS.  Effexor 150mg. 

2015 Begin using info at SurvivingAntidepressants.  Cut 10% - bad w/d 2 months, held 1 month. 

Micro-tapering: four weekly 0.4% cuts, hold 4 weeks (struggling with symptoms).

8 month hold.

2017 Micro-tapering: four weekly 1% cuts, hold 4 weeks (symptoms almost non-existent).

2020 Still micro-tapering. Just over 2/3 of the way off effexor. Minimal symptoms, - and sleeping well.
Supplements: Fish oil, vitamin C, iron, oat-straw tea, nettle tea.

2023 Now on 7 micro-beads of Effexor. Minimal symptoms but much more time needed between drops.

 'The possibility of renewal exists so long as life exists.'  Dr Gabor Mate.

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  • 3 weeks later...
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Just an update.  Did a cut from 19 to 17 mg mirtazapine on Oct.25 and felt fine until the fourth day when my two male dogs got in a fight that wouldn't end and I was alone.  It was very traumatizing and one got injured.  That stress caused me to start having withdrawal anxiety waves.  That was a Friday, and I had company coming for the weekend, and the house needed cleaning to boot!  So, Saturday morning hubby and I buzzed around cleaning, and then that evening I had an injured sheep that needed suturing - we have a sheep farm and I do herding with my dogs.  So, we had to kick into triage mode and suture the sheep up.  More stress!  Proud of myself for handling it, did a fine job, too!  However, I slept horribly, insomnia, imagining that the sutures were going to come open in the night, fretting....So, Sunday I was really wiped out and still having waves of anxiety that weren't real bad but still I made the rest of the day a couch day.  I'd say this wave lasted about five days.  Not sure if it would have started later or been negligible without the stressors.

 

I have been stable thereafter.

 

I am trying to keep a journal on this stuff, so will see if a pattern emerges.  Those of you tapering mirt, how long after the cut do you notice symptoms?

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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Thanks, Alto.  The sheep is fine, took her stitches out today, and my dog is also fine, but it was just the Perfect Storm weekend.  And yes, I am taking magnesium glycinate and a high DHA fish oil, and vitamin E, though I could up the fish oil.

 

I appreciate the response :-)

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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"Sorry you are feeling low, Leahy.  Wow, you have come down a long way on the mirt, from 90 mg - what a great accomplishment!  I am at 17 mg, myself, and worried about going into the lower doses where people start to have real difficulty with symptoms.  It is difficult to be patient but I know that going faster would be disastrous.  Between a rock and a hard place, for sure!


 


SG"


 


Thank you so much for your words of encouragement, SG. I appreciate every single one. Of your words. :-)


 


I find myself looking forward to the time when I dissolve a pill and remove some to take my dose. Another day closer.


 


I notice that I am recalling things I had forgotten. Little things but huge to me. Names, events, and words trickling back. I was having a serious word retrieval problem prior to withdrawal. 


 


Well, actually some things I was forgetting were extremely important. (sigh) I'm embarrassed to admit that. I'm not sure anyone outside of SA would understand or believe me.


 


Good healing to you,


Leahy


2001-2007 Rem 90 mg, xanax 2 mg synthroid 112mcg - 2007-2014 Rem 60 mg xanax 3-4 mg

2015   Feb Rem 45 mg xanax 2 mg, March Rem 30 xanax 2, April  Rem 22.5, May Rem 30  xanax .25x4 hrs, June Rem 26 xanax 2-3, July Rem 22.5 xanax 2, Aug Rem 15 xanax 2, Sept Rem 22 xanax 2, Oct Rem 18 mg xanax .25 mg /4 hrs, Nov Rem 23 mg xanax .5mg, Dec Rem 24 xanax 2 

2016  Jan Rem 20 xanax 2,  Feb Rem 18 mg xanax 1.5, Feb Rem 14 12 mg xanax 1 mg, March Rem 10 9 mg xanax 1-2 mg Rem 7.3 8 xanax 1-2, April Rem 10 12 mg xanax 2 mg, May Rem 11 xanax 1 .75mg Nov Rem 10mg Xanax 2mg 2017 May Rem 10.25 Xanax 1 mg, November Xanax 1mg

 

 

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  • 4 weeks later...

Hi SG,

 

It's heartbreaking you went through so much for so long with so many damn drugs! You have been so strong to stand all those! I found it very interesting reading the part of your farm life and feel amazed how much you can do even in mid of WD! You are a very strong person!

 

I'm glad you got nice windows here and there, and glad you can take antibiotics. I can't take anything anymore including vitamins which is another reason I feel I need to get off the meds as I'm also in my manaupause sooner or later I need the very basic medicine such as antibiotics and pain killers. I had a tooth work done mid this year and had to go through it without any meds.

 

Hope you continuous heeling,

Lex

Drug free Sep. 23 2017

2009 Mar.: lexapro 10mg for headache for 2 weeks.

2009-2012: on and off 1/4 to 1/3 of 10mg

2012 June--2013 Jan,: 1/4-1/3 of 10mg generic, bad jaw pain

2013 Jan-Mar: 10 mg generic. severe jaw and head pain;

2013 Mar--Aug. started tapering (liquid ever since) from 10 to 5 (one step) then gradually down to 2.25 mg by July. first ever panic attack, severe head/jaw pain

2013 Aug.: back to 2.75 mg; Nov: back to Brand Lex. 2.75mg -- 3mg,

2014 June: stopped PPI, head pressure/numbness. up-dosed 4.5mg, severe reaction mental symptoms added on

2014 Aug--2015 Aug: Micro taper down to 3.2mg, .025mg (<1%) cut holding 2-3 weeks.

2015 Aug 15th, Accidental one dose of 4.2mg. worsening brain non-functional, swollen head, body, coma like, DR

2016 Feb., started dosing 10am through 11 pm everyday 2/13--3.2mg, 3/15-- 2.9mg, 4/19-- 2.6mg, 6/26--2.2mg, 7/22 --1.9mg, 8/16--1.8mg,8/31--1.7m g, 9/13--1.6mg, 9/27--1.5mg, 10/8--1.4mg, 10/14--1.3mg, 11/1--1.2mg, 11/29--1.1mg, 12/12--1mg, 12/22--0.9mg

2017: 1/7--0.8mg, 1/15--0.7mg, 1/17--0.6mg, 1/20--0.52, 1/21--0.4mg, 1/22--0.26, 1/23--0.2, 2/13--0.13mg, 2/20--0.06mg, 3/18--0.13mg, 6/1--0.12mg, 7/6--0.1mg, 7/14--0.08mg, 8/17--0.04mg, 8/20--0.03mg, 8/28--0.02mg, 9/6--0.0205mg, 9/8--0.02mg, 9/17--0.015mg, 9/20--0.01mg, 9/21--0.0048mg, 9/22--0.0001mg,

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It's heartbreaking that any of us are here, really, because we probably all ended up here after running into trouble :-)

 

I wanted to do another update in general. I had a really good day!  I wondered if I was mildly manic.  I actually dragged myself away from the computer, went outside, and worked on a fence project I had been unmotivated about for a long time.  I also did some vacuuming with a new vacuum cleaner (why is it always more tolerable when you have a new toy to do it with?).  I feel my mind is full of ideas these days unlike before.  

 

I found that doing a 10% cut of mirtazapine per month left me with rather uncomfortable anxiety around days 5-10, so I decided to go to a 5% biweekly plan.  Just did a cut five days ago, and as I said, I felt great today!  Hopefully that continues to be so.  I am hoping that WD effects will be about un-noticeable this way. 

 

I weigh out both my mirtazapine and venlafaxine doses in batches of two weeks at a time for weighing consistency, put them in gel caps,  and the temptation is always there to drop the ven, though I know it is not sensible to taper both at the same time.  I did do a 10% cut of ven last month instead of mirt, and found the WD symptoms to be a little different, more irritability and a bit of insomnia with that one.  On this last weighing session, I dropped 1 mg gross weight from the ven, which probably falls within the inherent error of the scale.  I thought I would try in future to drop by 1-2 mg gross per two weeks which I don't think will be any problem.  I'm weighing out 75 mg now, equating to 28 mg active ingredient ven.

 

My weight increase still bothers me, but i am trying to change my attitude towards my body.  My new mantra is "my body is not my enemy, and I can nurture and honor it."  I am counting calories now to make sure I am not actually overeating, and find that I pretty easily stay at or below 1800 cal/day, even with a bit of chocolate.  Yes, I know that a lot of folks can't tolerate chocolate during withdrawal, but thankfully it doesn't seem to give me any trouble that I can discern.   If my weight doesn't continue to increase, perhaps I will swap and focus on tapering the ven while holding the mirt at 15 mg.

 

I went for an appointment with my p-doc for a med check today.  I was dreading it since he thinks I'm OCD for weighing my doses.  I printed out OffEFFexor's intro, being that he is a doctor in protracted WD 20 months out, and was going to give it to my doc, but another doc checked me in and I didn't think I was going to see my doc so gave her the print out.  She was actually very interested and agreed that protracted wd exists!  I told her she might be interested to read his story and she agreed. She had never heard of SA.  Maybe she'll share the info with my doc!

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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Hi Squirrelly Girl,

 

You sound concise, consistent and calculating !   What is your tapering schedule?   ( 5 %  bi - weekly ? ) What does that entail  ?  It sounds like it is working for you. I wouldn't worry what your p- doc thinks. It sounds like you are doing so well . I hope this continues for you, in a symptom free way , to the point of not noticing your cuts.  It certainly sounds like you are almost there, if not already . 

 

Hoping for your continued healing,

Ali

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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I'm so happy to hear how well you are doing SG. I know it's hard to accept that our pdocs do not believe us. Even though I tell myself I use her to get what I need, it does bother me that she tells me I'm "going too slow" with getting off remeron when I was so proud of myslef for started my own liquid taper. My pdoc insists our body doesn't notice these cuts. I should just keep halving it. That's what her other patients do. Urghh! It's hard to believe those other people haven't gotten sick. And I want to prove to her it matters even though what pdoc thinks it should not matter to me. She doesn't even believe remeron make a person fat!

 

Have a good day, SG.

 

Leahy

2001-2007 Rem 90 mg, xanax 2 mg synthroid 112mcg - 2007-2014 Rem 60 mg xanax 3-4 mg

2015   Feb Rem 45 mg xanax 2 mg, March Rem 30 xanax 2, April  Rem 22.5, May Rem 30  xanax .25x4 hrs, June Rem 26 xanax 2-3, July Rem 22.5 xanax 2, Aug Rem 15 xanax 2, Sept Rem 22 xanax 2, Oct Rem 18 mg xanax .25 mg /4 hrs, Nov Rem 23 mg xanax .5mg, Dec Rem 24 xanax 2 

2016  Jan Rem 20 xanax 2,  Feb Rem 18 mg xanax 1.5, Feb Rem 14 12 mg xanax 1 mg, March Rem 10 9 mg xanax 1-2 mg Rem 7.3 8 xanax 1-2, April Rem 10 12 mg xanax 2 mg, May Rem 11 xanax 1 .75mg Nov Rem 10mg Xanax 2mg 2017 May Rem 10.25 Xanax 1 mg, November Xanax 1mg

 

 

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  • Moderator

Doing the biweekly cuts sounds like a good plan.  Might I suggest alternating 2 and 4 weeks between drops.  That would give a little extra time for the cumulative affects of the full 10% drop to settle out before starting again.

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hello SquirrellyGirl,

 

 I just wanted to tell you that I liked your posts to our members here a lot. Even if they fall on deaf ears for some of them, there are others like me who found them very helpful :)

 

I'm very impressed by the change of negative thinking patterns that you were able to achieve, your insights into the roles drugs played in your life and I also very much appreciated your sharing about dealing with anger. I was exactly like you described: unable to let the anger out, for a long time even unable to feel it. Now I'm slowly learning how to deal with anger in a way which is not destructive to me or others. (My therapist finds it amusing (and it's our private joke) how I come very shaken saying that I was very aggressive after I had to wait for my appointment for 2 hours. She told me she imagined chairs flying but what happened is that I just said I was going to leave and I left even after they summoned the doctor who was suddenly available. 

 

Feeling anger is so out of character, I have no idea what to do with it. My therapist of course advises acting because of anger (because that is it's role: to mobilise us to protect our personal borders) and not out of anger. It still feels like being catapulted into space without any gear. The rewiring process seems to be very slow. It took me a long time to see this (and other) blind spot so I literally have to thread new neurological pathways. Sometimes I feel like giving myself a break and reverting to my comfort zone of just being quiet about whatever makes me angry. But when I do act it is a very conscious effort... I will definitely google Emotional Brain Training... 

 

It's great to have you around and good luck with your taper (turtle wins the race)

 

Bubble

Current: 9/2022 Xanax 0.08, Lexapro 2

2020 Xanax 0.26 (down from 2 mg in 2013), Lexapro 2.85 mg (down from 5 mg 2013)

Amitriptyline (tricyclic AD) and clonazepam for 3 months to treat headache in 1996 
1999. - present Xanax prn up to 3 mg.
2000-2005 Prozac CT twice, 2005-2010 Zoloft CT 3 times, 2010-2013 Escitalopram 10 mg
went from 2.5 to zero on 7 Aug 2013, bad crash 40 days after
reinstated to 5 mg Escitalopram 4Oct 2013 and holding liquid Xanax every 5 hours
28 Jan 2014 Xanax 1.9, 18 Apr  2015 1 mg,  25 June 2015 Lex 4.8, 6 Aug Lexapro 4.6, 1 Jan 2016 0.64  Xanax     9 month hold

24 Sept 2016 4.5 Lex, 17 Oct 4.4 Lex (Nov 0.63 Xanax, Dec 0.625 Xanax), 1 Jan 2017 4.3 Lex, 24 Jan 4.2, 5 Feb 4.1, 24 Mar 4 mg, 10 Apr 3.9 mg, May 3.85, June 3.8, July 3.75, 22 July 3.7, 15 Aug 3.65, 17 Sept 3.6, 1 Jan 2018 3.55, 19 Jan 3.5, 16 Mar 3.4, 14 Apr 3.3, 23 May 3.2, 16 June 3.15, 15 Jul 3.1, 31 Jul 3, 21 Aug 2.9 26 Sept 2.85, 14 Nov Xan 0.61, 1 Dec 0.59, 19 Dec 0.58, 4 Jan 0.565, 6 Feb 0.55, 20 Feb 0.535, 1 Mar 0.505, 10 Mar 0.475, 14 Mar 0.45, 4 Apr 0.415, 13 Apr 0.37, 21 Apr 0.33, 29 Apr 0.29, 10 May 0.27, 17 May 0.25, 28 May 0.22, 19 June 0.22, 21 Jun updose to 0.24, 24 Jun updose to 0.26

Supplements: Omega 3 + Vit E, Vit C, D, magnesium, Taurine, probiotic 

I'm not a medical professional. Any advice I give is based on my own experience and reading. 

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Hi Bubble, thank you so much for your kind post!

 

I have come a long way but still have my moments!  Today I was pretty irritable with my dogs, but reminded myself that it's probably WD (at least it feels like it).  I also had a hard time actually feeling anger or emotions in general.  Since I was on the meds for 20 years, I can't even remember how I was about feeling before, but I do know my family was not demonstrative, positive or negative!  

 

It's so nice to meet you, Bubble!  I'm glad you're here!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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I second that emotion, Bubble. If my brain were working a little better I would have written exactly what you wrote about SG!

 

I have been thinking about you Bubble, also because I think you were the one who advised me a while back about xanax tapering while AD tapering. I put X on hold saving it for hopefully a good night's sleep. I feel like I'm caught between a rock and a hard place.

 

It's great to have both of you around.

 

Leahy

2001-2007 Rem 90 mg, xanax 2 mg synthroid 112mcg - 2007-2014 Rem 60 mg xanax 3-4 mg

2015   Feb Rem 45 mg xanax 2 mg, March Rem 30 xanax 2, April  Rem 22.5, May Rem 30  xanax .25x4 hrs, June Rem 26 xanax 2-3, July Rem 22.5 xanax 2, Aug Rem 15 xanax 2, Sept Rem 22 xanax 2, Oct Rem 18 mg xanax .25 mg /4 hrs, Nov Rem 23 mg xanax .5mg, Dec Rem 24 xanax 2 

2016  Jan Rem 20 xanax 2,  Feb Rem 18 mg xanax 1.5, Feb Rem 14 12 mg xanax 1 mg, March Rem 10 9 mg xanax 1-2 mg Rem 7.3 8 xanax 1-2, April Rem 10 12 mg xanax 2 mg, May Rem 11 xanax 1 .75mg Nov Rem 10mg Xanax 2mg 2017 May Rem 10.25 Xanax 1 mg, November Xanax 1mg

 

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Today is a blah day.  I feel down, but without a reason, so must be neuro-depression.  Also a bit irritable. i'm 10 days out from a Remeron cut so maybe it is still WD from the cut.  I had "heavy head," and a weird sensation over my face for the prior few days.  Didn't help that I ate too much sugar over the holidays!  I have put on more weight, of course, and that doesn't help!

 

It is discouraging that CBT and the like don't seem to help us when we are suffering from neuro emotions.  

 

I've been spending too much time on patient.info identifying people who are in poop out and wondering if they should raise their meds or switch, and boy what a can of worms!  It makes me so angry what is being done to sooo many people!  A rock and a hard place, we are!  I just feel such a need to help them.  Wondering what line of education I might take in order to become an advisor of some kind.

 

I am also suffering from a lot of aches and pains and wondering whether its from the drugs for so many years, or WD or what.  I still have the pain in my arse from the yoga I tried to do nearly a year ago when in withdrawal.  Wakes me up at night.  Also, I've suffered from plantar fasciitis that has lasted for several years at a time, and I was on Effexor throughout.  My shoulders also bother me at night when I lie on my side, as if the ligaments are being stressed or something  I've read others stories about the tendons/ligaments just not being as strong or something.  The spot where my clavicle attaches to the sternum on one side of my chest also throbs and aches, and I mean really, what an odd spot to have pain!  I've been so stoic about my aches and pains that I never really thought about the drugs being the source, spellbinding and all!

 

Generally speaking tapering has gone well, but today is just yuck!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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I have to say, though, that it must be very exciting to be at 15 mg Remeron. Congratulations on that. Not an easy task by any means.

 

The holidays kind of set us up for ups and downs, don't you think? It's the nature of the season. It's tough to feel like we are supposed to be happy suddenly. It's a lot of work! At best it changes our routine which is not helpful to me. I know I need my steady routine to make progress mentally and physically. 

 

You would be so good at helping people, SG. I wish there were a "degree" of some kind so more people could help us with this struggle.That's a great idea. Maybe some day there will be withdrawal doctors. We sure could use the help.

 

I did read somewhere how ad's affect our muscles. Who would have thought about that? I have had achilles heel tendonitis for a couple of months now. The podiatrist gave me stretching exercises to do, a foot brace to wear at night, and insole inserts. I look like an old lady hobbling along.

 

"About this FactMed analysis covering adverse side effect reports of REMERON patients who developed TENDONITIS.

FactMed provides MD-approved analysis to help both patients, researchers, and physicians accurately assess the risk profile for more than 20,000 different pharmaceutical products. The below report offers compiled information from Food & Drug Administration and FactMed user submissions. Between January 2004 and October 2012, 43 individuals taking REMERON reported TENDONITIS to the FDA. A total of 8281 REMERON drug adverse event reaction reports were made with the FDA during this time period. Often the FDA only receives reports of the most critical and severe cases; these numbers may therefore underrepresent the complication rate of the medication. "

 

L

2001-2007 Rem 90 mg, xanax 2 mg synthroid 112mcg - 2007-2014 Rem 60 mg xanax 3-4 mg

2015   Feb Rem 45 mg xanax 2 mg, March Rem 30 xanax 2, April  Rem 22.5, May Rem 30  xanax .25x4 hrs, June Rem 26 xanax 2-3, July Rem 22.5 xanax 2, Aug Rem 15 xanax 2, Sept Rem 22 xanax 2, Oct Rem 18 mg xanax .25 mg /4 hrs, Nov Rem 23 mg xanax .5mg, Dec Rem 24 xanax 2 

2016  Jan Rem 20 xanax 2,  Feb Rem 18 mg xanax 1.5, Feb Rem 14 12 mg xanax 1 mg, March Rem 10 9 mg xanax 1-2 mg Rem 7.3 8 xanax 1-2, April Rem 10 12 mg xanax 2 mg, May Rem 11 xanax 1 .75mg Nov Rem 10mg Xanax 2mg 2017 May Rem 10.25 Xanax 1 mg, November Xanax 1mg

 

 

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Hi squirrellygirl

I'm sorry to hear that you are having a bad day. I wish there was a magic pill for you cause you deserve so much reward as you help so many people with support like myself. I hope this passes for you soon SG.

Currently suffer extreme CFS, Lyme, adrenal fatigue, bad gut issues, reaction bad to mold basically etc home a lot. Can hardly walk all I get crash easily. 
I’m currently on mirtizapine 1.7mg and Reboxetine 0.4mg. I did a cut on reboxetine on the 19/4/20 around 11%. 
Also taking Ativan since January 2mg. 
 
 
 

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

 

I did read somewhere how ad's affect our muscles. Who would have thought about that? I have had achilles heel tendonitis for a couple of months now. The podiatrist gave me stretching exercises to do, a foot brace to wear at night, and insole inserts. I look like an old lady hobbling along.

 

"About this FactMed analysis covering adverse side effect reports of REMERON patients who developed TENDONITIS.

FactMed provides MD-approved analysis to help both patients, researchers, and physicians accurately assess the risk profile for more than 20,000 different pharmaceutical products. The below report offers compiled information from Food & Drug Administration and FactMed user submissions. Between January 2004 and October 2012, 43 individuals taking REMERON reported TENDONITIS to the FDA. A total of 8281 REMERON drug adverse event reaction reports were made with the FDA during this time period. Often the FDA only receives reports of the most critical and severe cases; these numbers may therefore underrepresent the complication rate of the medication. "

 

L

Hi Leahy!

 

Thanks for dropping in.  That is very interesting info about Remeron and tendonitis.  I've only been on it since April so all my aches, pains and plantar fasciitis came before that.  I'll have to check and see what Effexor's fact sheet says.  

 

Well, the day got better in that when I went out and did errands I came out of the blahs.  However, we had to take my cat to the emergency vet due to a urinary blockage, just got back shortly ago, so really didn't need that!

 

Hopefully, tomorrow will be a better day!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Yesterday I weighed out my next 2 week set of Effexor capsules, and nudged the actual weight from 75 to 74 mg.  If my scale can even register that small of a change accurately, that would amount to a difference of 0.375 mg of Effexor.  This morning I woke feeling....normal!! And so I took the first of this new dosage.  Still felt great, functioned well with a client coming to train her dogs for herding.  Had fun!

 

Then I drove 45 minutes to the city where I had my first appointment with a homeopath.  She also does cranial sacral therapy and spent what seemed like an hour working on me.

 

I left and went to a hardware store to buy a couple of things, put them in the plastic basket you carry around in the store, checked out, went to my car and found myself about to put the basket in my car!  Normally, one would leave it at the check out counter!  D'oh!

 

Then I went to get gas.  Got out of the car, ran my ATM card, started fueling, and then went to sit in my car while it was filling up since it was cold.  The door was locked!  My keys were in the ignition!! My purse was in the car!  Oy!  So, I went into the mini mart and asked to use a phone since mine was in my purse.  Borrowed one of the worker's cell phones.  Called my roadside assistance plan and they arranged for a guy to come.  While I was waiting, I discovered that my cell phone was in my pocket!!!

 

I have no recollection of locking the car when I got out.  I am usually so careful about that since I have locked my keys in my car sooooooo many times before!  

 

I was worried I wouldn't make the drive home without an accident along the way!!

 

Was it the 1 mg or the cranial sacral work?

 

It's really pretty amazing that I have remained as functional as I have with the cognitive issues, I swear!!

 

Happy New Year, Everyone!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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Happy New Year Dear SG!

That was such a fun description of your day me I enjoy reading it!

 

I'm so happy you were feeling normal and did all those chores even with a bit hiccup locking yourself out :)

 

Hope you continue making the peace with the tiny drops,

 

Love

Lex

Drug free Sep. 23 2017

2009 Mar.: lexapro 10mg for headache for 2 weeks.

2009-2012: on and off 1/4 to 1/3 of 10mg

2012 June--2013 Jan,: 1/4-1/3 of 10mg generic, bad jaw pain

2013 Jan-Mar: 10 mg generic. severe jaw and head pain;

2013 Mar--Aug. started tapering (liquid ever since) from 10 to 5 (one step) then gradually down to 2.25 mg by July. first ever panic attack, severe head/jaw pain

2013 Aug.: back to 2.75 mg; Nov: back to Brand Lex. 2.75mg -- 3mg,

2014 June: stopped PPI, head pressure/numbness. up-dosed 4.5mg, severe reaction mental symptoms added on

2014 Aug--2015 Aug: Micro taper down to 3.2mg, .025mg (<1%) cut holding 2-3 weeks.

2015 Aug 15th, Accidental one dose of 4.2mg. worsening brain non-functional, swollen head, body, coma like, DR

2016 Feb., started dosing 10am through 11 pm everyday 2/13--3.2mg, 3/15-- 2.9mg, 4/19-- 2.6mg, 6/26--2.2mg, 7/22 --1.9mg, 8/16--1.8mg,8/31--1.7m g, 9/13--1.6mg, 9/27--1.5mg, 10/8--1.4mg, 10/14--1.3mg, 11/1--1.2mg, 11/29--1.1mg, 12/12--1mg, 12/22--0.9mg

2017: 1/7--0.8mg, 1/15--0.7mg, 1/17--0.6mg, 1/20--0.52, 1/21--0.4mg, 1/22--0.26, 1/23--0.2, 2/13--0.13mg, 2/20--0.06mg, 3/18--0.13mg, 6/1--0.12mg, 7/6--0.1mg, 7/14--0.08mg, 8/17--0.04mg, 8/20--0.03mg, 8/28--0.02mg, 9/6--0.0205mg, 9/8--0.02mg, 9/17--0.015mg, 9/20--0.01mg, 9/21--0.0048mg, 9/22--0.0001mg,

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Luckily our Lex is feeling good so she sees the glass half full. Isn't this precious? It's all about the perspective: you can either see cognitive hiccups or somebody who did a lot of things.

 

I also admire how much you are able to achieve despite cognitive issues. My recent cognitive issues meant that I was completely unable to recall whether I took my doses or nor, or just found a full syringe with my eveninh dose in the morning, etc.

 

Happy New Year to all of us with less cognitive and other issues.

Current: 9/2022 Xanax 0.08, Lexapro 2

2020 Xanax 0.26 (down from 2 mg in 2013), Lexapro 2.85 mg (down from 5 mg 2013)

Amitriptyline (tricyclic AD) and clonazepam for 3 months to treat headache in 1996 
1999. - present Xanax prn up to 3 mg.
2000-2005 Prozac CT twice, 2005-2010 Zoloft CT 3 times, 2010-2013 Escitalopram 10 mg
went from 2.5 to zero on 7 Aug 2013, bad crash 40 days after
reinstated to 5 mg Escitalopram 4Oct 2013 and holding liquid Xanax every 5 hours
28 Jan 2014 Xanax 1.9, 18 Apr  2015 1 mg,  25 June 2015 Lex 4.8, 6 Aug Lexapro 4.6, 1 Jan 2016 0.64  Xanax     9 month hold

24 Sept 2016 4.5 Lex, 17 Oct 4.4 Lex (Nov 0.63 Xanax, Dec 0.625 Xanax), 1 Jan 2017 4.3 Lex, 24 Jan 4.2, 5 Feb 4.1, 24 Mar 4 mg, 10 Apr 3.9 mg, May 3.85, June 3.8, July 3.75, 22 July 3.7, 15 Aug 3.65, 17 Sept 3.6, 1 Jan 2018 3.55, 19 Jan 3.5, 16 Mar 3.4, 14 Apr 3.3, 23 May 3.2, 16 June 3.15, 15 Jul 3.1, 31 Jul 3, 21 Aug 2.9 26 Sept 2.85, 14 Nov Xan 0.61, 1 Dec 0.59, 19 Dec 0.58, 4 Jan 0.565, 6 Feb 0.55, 20 Feb 0.535, 1 Mar 0.505, 10 Mar 0.475, 14 Mar 0.45, 4 Apr 0.415, 13 Apr 0.37, 21 Apr 0.33, 29 Apr 0.29, 10 May 0.27, 17 May 0.25, 28 May 0.22, 19 June 0.22, 21 Jun updose to 0.24, 24 Jun updose to 0.26

Supplements: Omega 3 + Vit E, Vit C, D, magnesium, Taurine, probiotic 

I'm not a medical professional. Any advice I give is based on my own experience and reading. 

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SG,

 

All those things could happen to anyone and I dare say are rather normal with multitasking kind of days. The cars locked, keys inside - I've done that a few times BEFORE I took medications and it happens to people quite often. Yes ,AAA came and got in the car for me.  

 

My current car will not lock with the keys inside as a precaution. I asked why that was set up that way 12 years ago when I bought the car. It was purposely set up that way as a preventative measure by the car company because people often do lock their keys inside. 

 

Busy people go into overload. Perfectly normal human oversight. Stuff happens. It's great that you see a homeopath, though. I'll have to google cranial sacral therapy to see what it is.

 

Bottom line is You are doing great!

 

L

2001-2007 Rem 90 mg, xanax 2 mg synthroid 112mcg - 2007-2014 Rem 60 mg xanax 3-4 mg

2015   Feb Rem 45 mg xanax 2 mg, March Rem 30 xanax 2, April  Rem 22.5, May Rem 30  xanax .25x4 hrs, June Rem 26 xanax 2-3, July Rem 22.5 xanax 2, Aug Rem 15 xanax 2, Sept Rem 22 xanax 2, Oct Rem 18 mg xanax .25 mg /4 hrs, Nov Rem 23 mg xanax .5mg, Dec Rem 24 xanax 2 

2016  Jan Rem 20 xanax 2,  Feb Rem 18 mg xanax 1.5, Feb Rem 14 12 mg xanax 1 mg, March Rem 10 9 mg xanax 1-2 mg Rem 7.3 8 xanax 1-2, April Rem 10 12 mg xanax 2 mg, May Rem 11 xanax 1 .75mg Nov Rem 10mg Xanax 2mg 2017 May Rem 10.25 Xanax 1 mg, November Xanax 1mg

 

 

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Luckily our Lex is feeling good so she sees the glass half full. Isn't this precious? It's all about the perspective: you can either see cognitive hiccups or somebody who did a lot of things.

I also admire how much you are able to achieve despite cognitive issues. My recent cognitive issues meant that I was completely unable to recall whether I took my doses or nor, or just found a full syringe with my eveninh dose in the morning, etc.

Happy New Year to all of us with less cognitive and other issues.

This thing really tricks your mind in such a ridiculous way indeed:). When symptoms are away, you almost forget all the insane experience you had just days ago and thinking life again as if you don't have these problems any more. I consider it a mercy and positive effects of the WD.

Drug free Sep. 23 2017

2009 Mar.: lexapro 10mg for headache for 2 weeks.

2009-2012: on and off 1/4 to 1/3 of 10mg

2012 June--2013 Jan,: 1/4-1/3 of 10mg generic, bad jaw pain

2013 Jan-Mar: 10 mg generic. severe jaw and head pain;

2013 Mar--Aug. started tapering (liquid ever since) from 10 to 5 (one step) then gradually down to 2.25 mg by July. first ever panic attack, severe head/jaw pain

2013 Aug.: back to 2.75 mg; Nov: back to Brand Lex. 2.75mg -- 3mg,

2014 June: stopped PPI, head pressure/numbness. up-dosed 4.5mg, severe reaction mental symptoms added on

2014 Aug--2015 Aug: Micro taper down to 3.2mg, .025mg (<1%) cut holding 2-3 weeks.

2015 Aug 15th, Accidental one dose of 4.2mg. worsening brain non-functional, swollen head, body, coma like, DR

2016 Feb., started dosing 10am through 11 pm everyday 2/13--3.2mg, 3/15-- 2.9mg, 4/19-- 2.6mg, 6/26--2.2mg, 7/22 --1.9mg, 8/16--1.8mg,8/31--1.7m g, 9/13--1.6mg, 9/27--1.5mg, 10/8--1.4mg, 10/14--1.3mg, 11/1--1.2mg, 11/29--1.1mg, 12/12--1mg, 12/22--0.9mg

2017: 1/7--0.8mg, 1/15--0.7mg, 1/17--0.6mg, 1/20--0.52, 1/21--0.4mg, 1/22--0.26, 1/23--0.2, 2/13--0.13mg, 2/20--0.06mg, 3/18--0.13mg, 6/1--0.12mg, 7/6--0.1mg, 7/14--0.08mg, 8/17--0.04mg, 8/20--0.03mg, 8/28--0.02mg, 9/6--0.0205mg, 9/8--0.02mg, 9/17--0.015mg, 9/20--0.01mg, 9/21--0.0048mg, 9/22--0.0001mg,

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • Moderator Emeritus

Well, I was doing 1 mg cuts of mirt every 2 weeks, a little more than 5%.  Three weeks ago Wednesday I made it to 15 mg and held there for 3 weeks.  Felt fine other than the weird cognitive blip I had above.  On Wednesday I went to 8% cut, but that was out of laziness trying to get shavings off my 15 mg half of a 30.  So, the next day I weighed out approximately 14.3 mg doses for the next two weeks.  So, the last two nights have been at that dose.  Sleeping heavier in the mornings, it seems.

 

When I got up this morning the sun was shining so beautifully after a rainy week, and I went out to feed the horses and let the chickens out of their coop.  I felt inspired, to do so projects that I've been working on.  I raise sheep and it is lambing time.  I love the lambs!  When I went to feed the ewes in a small "pasture", I discovered a ewe that had been laboring in the night.  I had to pull the lamb and it was still-born, stuck.  On an intellectual level I thought "these things happen, what a bummer" but I wasn't upset the way I would be over losing a pet.  However, since then my mood has really slid and I feel crabby and totally demotivated, and on the verge of weepiness.  I guess this loss has triggered a bit of a wave.

 

Ugh, it's amazing how easy it is to lose all the forward, positive thinking.  I've been suffering from low motivation for so long, years really, and it's really getting old.  I feel like I just want to stay on the couch all day, now.  Negativity is flooding over me.  I know this is neuro, but it doesn't make it any easier.  I am going to take a walk with my husband and the dogs now and hope that A) I don't get too crabby with the dogs' naughty antics and B) that it will actually make me feel better.  Then I guess I'll do some meditations and try to find some positive to read or watch.  Gotta take my own advice!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Squirrellygirl , I'm dropping in just to say hi and catch up with your thread.

From reading your posts around , it really sounds like you have an amazing attitude and are on top of things. And you give very warm advice , which I enjoy reading.

 

Try not to be in too much of a hurry with the tapering.

5% every 2 weeks is the maximum recommended decrease , but that's for tapering

one drug at a time. As you've been tapering 2 , you may want to alternate cuts.

For old chooks like us who have more than 20 years under our belts , the risk of tapering off then getting protracted withdrawal many months later is very real. It happened to me in 2014 , and Dr Shipko's latest attests to the fact that it's not uncommon. I'd hate to see you race along and suffer for it later.

 

Again , thanks for such wonderful posts. And the suturing sheep . . . oh my goodness!

 

;) bw , Fresh

 

.

1987-1997 pertofran , prothiaden , Prozac 1997-2002 Zoloft 2002-2004 effexor 2004-2010 Lexapro 40mg

2010-2012Cymbalta 120mg

Sept. 2012 -decreased 90mg in 6months. Care taken over by Dr Lucire in March 2013 , decreased last 30mg at 2mg per week over 3 months. July 21 , 2013- last dose of Cymbalta

Protracted withdrawal syndrome kicked in badly Jan.2014 Unrelenting akathisia until May 2014. Voluntary hosp. admission. Cocktail of Seroquel, Ativan and mirtazapine and I was well enough to go home after 14 days. Stopped all hosp. meds in next few months.

July 2014 felt v.depressed - couldn't stop crying. Started pristiq 50mg. Felt improvement within days and continued to improve, so stayed on 50mg for 8 months.

Began taper 28 Feb. 2015. Pristiq 50mg down to 45mg. Had one month of w/d symptoms. Started CES therapy in March. No w/d symptoms down to 30mg.

October 2015 , taking 25mg Pristiq. Capsules compounded with slow-release additive.

March 2016 , 21mg

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Fresh, thank you for stopping by my thread :-)

 

I know, tapering two meds not advised.  I really have slowed it down on the ven, though.  When it is time to weigh out more ven I might drop it 1 mg gross weight which is about .375 mg active ingredient, so I didn't think it would mess me up.  I do have to back it off on the mirt, been too hasty on that one but so tired of the weight gain. 

 

Acceptance is very difficult at these times, acceptance that I must take it very slow. I feel I have really lost touch with who I really am through all these years of drug use, especially the last 12 on Effexor.  Even the early years on Effexor I had more motivation than I have had in the last few years, and I'm just so confused as to what's what.  Aside from the bad withdrawal last year, I still had a lot of cognition and motivation issues and I had cut down on the ven over the years so I don't know if it was withdrawal from ven all along sapping my life force, or just being on it at all?  

 

Before I went on any of these drugs when I was 30, I had always had dysfunctional thinking, lack of confidence, low self-esteem, etc, but I still had drive and did things I felt passionate about.  I started a dog training business!  I pursued my hobby of training my Aussies to herd.  I managed to continue my passions into the drugged years, but it has been the last four years that I have really lost it.  I guess I see coming off these drugs as a way to get some kind of life force back.  I do know that I didn't like who I had become in the later Effexor years, unable to feel excited about much.

 

I will try to be patient and not push the envelope!  Still struggling today, no motivation, no energy. Flat.

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Squirelly. Sorry about your lamb :( I grew up in the country and I think I miss the cycles of nature badly while sitting at the office. I often daydream of going back to the land. But after more than half of my life away I think I would be lost there as well...

 

Do you think some part of your blah feeling might be connected with short winter days? Did you have a chance to see a latest update on the use of a lightbox? I definitely have a winter and spring personality.

 

There are so many hard things about this. Acceptance definitely one of them. Unfortunately pushing ones taper can have very painful consequences (as I'm finding out now) and slow the whole thing down. So we can't never support each other enough in keeping things slow. 

 

oing through some old threads yesterday I came across some words of wisdom and reassurance from our friend Rhi.

 

I'm glad I'll post them here for all of us now:

 

I know I just have to take it one day at a time and this will pass. At least, I'm pretty sure it will, because so far every time I hold long enough, I get to feeling pretty good eventually. But it's so hard to be patient. I want my life back NOW. Still, when you got no choice you got no choice,. 

 

 

 

 

 

I ended up going back to 75 Mg. I plan on going down extremely slowly from here. I can't handle the neuro emotions- they are far too intense. Quite a hard lesson!

I think the key is tapering slowly and taking long enough breaks (holds) whenever you first begin to experience symptoms, instead of waiting until they become intolerable.

So often people think, "oh this isn't so bad, I can tough it out" and keep pushing the taper.

 

Who is this Rhi person? I should listen to her. Been pushing my taper a bit and having some bad days...feeling really down and discouraged and pessimistic about life. hm. Okay okay okay going to hold for a while.

 

 

This is also great regarding the listening to your own advice (I think you mentioned it). We are human. This is hard. Very hard. But we are doing it. And being together makes it so much easier.

Current: 9/2022 Xanax 0.08, Lexapro 2

2020 Xanax 0.26 (down from 2 mg in 2013), Lexapro 2.85 mg (down from 5 mg 2013)

Amitriptyline (tricyclic AD) and clonazepam for 3 months to treat headache in 1996 
1999. - present Xanax prn up to 3 mg.
2000-2005 Prozac CT twice, 2005-2010 Zoloft CT 3 times, 2010-2013 Escitalopram 10 mg
went from 2.5 to zero on 7 Aug 2013, bad crash 40 days after
reinstated to 5 mg Escitalopram 4Oct 2013 and holding liquid Xanax every 5 hours
28 Jan 2014 Xanax 1.9, 18 Apr  2015 1 mg,  25 June 2015 Lex 4.8, 6 Aug Lexapro 4.6, 1 Jan 2016 0.64  Xanax     9 month hold

24 Sept 2016 4.5 Lex, 17 Oct 4.4 Lex (Nov 0.63 Xanax, Dec 0.625 Xanax), 1 Jan 2017 4.3 Lex, 24 Jan 4.2, 5 Feb 4.1, 24 Mar 4 mg, 10 Apr 3.9 mg, May 3.85, June 3.8, July 3.75, 22 July 3.7, 15 Aug 3.65, 17 Sept 3.6, 1 Jan 2018 3.55, 19 Jan 3.5, 16 Mar 3.4, 14 Apr 3.3, 23 May 3.2, 16 June 3.15, 15 Jul 3.1, 31 Jul 3, 21 Aug 2.9 26 Sept 2.85, 14 Nov Xan 0.61, 1 Dec 0.59, 19 Dec 0.58, 4 Jan 0.565, 6 Feb 0.55, 20 Feb 0.535, 1 Mar 0.505, 10 Mar 0.475, 14 Mar 0.45, 4 Apr 0.415, 13 Apr 0.37, 21 Apr 0.33, 29 Apr 0.29, 10 May 0.27, 17 May 0.25, 28 May 0.22, 19 June 0.22, 21 Jun updose to 0.24, 24 Jun updose to 0.26

Supplements: Omega 3 + Vit E, Vit C, D, magnesium, Taurine, probiotic 

I'm not a medical professional. Any advice I give is based on my own experience and reading. 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Squirelly. Sorry about your lamb :( I grew up in the country and I think I miss the cycles of nature badly while sitting at the office. I often daydream of going back to the land. But after more than half of my life away I think I would be lost there as well...

 

Do you think some part of your blah feeling might be connected with short winter days? Did you have a chance to see a latest update on the use of a lightbox? I definitely have a winter and spring personality.

 

There are so many hard things about this. Acceptance definitely one of them. Unfortunately pushing ones taper can have very painful consequences (as I'm finding out now) and slow the whole thing down. So we can't never support each other enough in keeping things slow. 

 

oing through some old threads yesterday I came across some words of wisdom and reassurance from our friend Rhi.

 

I'm glad I'll post them here for all of us now:

 

I know I just have to take it one day at a time and this will pass. At least, I'm pretty sure it will, because so far every time I hold long enough, I get to feeling pretty good eventually. But it's so hard to be patient. I want my life back NOW. Still, when you got no choice you got no choice,. 

 

 

 

 

 

I ended up going back to 75 Mg. I plan on going down extremely slowly from here. I can't handle the neuro emotions- they are far too intense. Quite a hard lesson!

I think the key is tapering slowly and taking long enough breaks (holds) whenever you first begin to experience symptoms, instead of waiting until they become intolerable.

 

So often people think, "oh this isn't so bad, I can tough it out" and keep pushing the taper.

 

Who is this Rhi person? I should listen to her. Been pushing my taper a bit and having some bad days...feeling really down and discouraged and pessimistic about life. hm. Okay okay okay going to hold for a while.

 

 

This is also great regarding the listening to your own advice (I think you mentioned it). We are human. This is hard. Very hard. But we are doing it. And being together makes it so much easier.

Bubble, thank you!  Reading this post makes me feel weepy in a good way LOL!  Those neuro-emotions again!  Thanks for giving me a bit of perspective, need reminding now and again  :-)))))))

 

I did get outside and do a couple of things, so glad to have done it though it was hard.  I just feel like my life is on hold while going through this and always so vulnerable to upsets.  Back to the anger of how did I end up here, how could I let so much of my adult life be consumed by these drugs, how can they dish these drugs out so easily when they cause such profound changes to the brain?  It's like surgery or something!  The various stages of grief...sometimes they come back up out of order LOL!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi SG,

 

I'm going through a "blah" stage too at the moment.  And I agree with you that it is the stages of grief.

 

This really resonated with me:  when you got no choice you got no choice

 

All we can do is the best we are able to at the time.  Being able to read other people's struggles and talking about my own and getting support helps me to know that I am not doing this alone.

 

I am learning patience.  But I want it now!  I've got a "High Tide" cartoon on my fridge from about 20 years ago.  Dude goes into bookshop and says "I'd like a book on stress management", next frame "NOW!"

 

I hope we all start to feel a bit brighter and lighter soon.  CC

* NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA *

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:  (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq  on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

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I did get outside and do a couple of things, so glad to have done it though it was hard. I just feel like my life is on hold while going through this and always so vulnerable to upsets. Back to the anger of how did I end up here, how could I let so much of my adult life be consumed by these drugs, how can they dish these drugs out so easily when they cause such profound changes to the brain? It's like surgery or something! The various stages of grief...sometimes they come back up out of order LOL!

 

Hi SG,

 

thanks for stopping by my thread!

Yeah, these thoughts still came to me too once in awhile even I feel I reached full acceptance a year or so ago. It has been one of the most challenging issue for me thinking all the misfortune from the drug were caused by my own ignorance listening to a friend, and for a bad headache! I guess it is almost impossible for anyone not having these thoughts giving the huge loss and insane torture.

 

Somehow I feel it's also part of the WD as I don think it much when I'm in a low wave or a window.

 

good thing we have each! I can't imagine if I'm the only one going through this without anyone understands.

 

I'm sure it will pass for you.

 

Lex

Drug free Sep. 23 2017

2009 Mar.: lexapro 10mg for headache for 2 weeks.

2009-2012: on and off 1/4 to 1/3 of 10mg

2012 June--2013 Jan,: 1/4-1/3 of 10mg generic, bad jaw pain

2013 Jan-Mar: 10 mg generic. severe jaw and head pain;

2013 Mar--Aug. started tapering (liquid ever since) from 10 to 5 (one step) then gradually down to 2.25 mg by July. first ever panic attack, severe head/jaw pain

2013 Aug.: back to 2.75 mg; Nov: back to Brand Lex. 2.75mg -- 3mg,

2014 June: stopped PPI, head pressure/numbness. up-dosed 4.5mg, severe reaction mental symptoms added on

2014 Aug--2015 Aug: Micro taper down to 3.2mg, .025mg (<1%) cut holding 2-3 weeks.

2015 Aug 15th, Accidental one dose of 4.2mg. worsening brain non-functional, swollen head, body, coma like, DR

2016 Feb., started dosing 10am through 11 pm everyday 2/13--3.2mg, 3/15-- 2.9mg, 4/19-- 2.6mg, 6/26--2.2mg, 7/22 --1.9mg, 8/16--1.8mg,8/31--1.7m g, 9/13--1.6mg, 9/27--1.5mg, 10/8--1.4mg, 10/14--1.3mg, 11/1--1.2mg, 11/29--1.1mg, 12/12--1mg, 12/22--0.9mg

2017: 1/7--0.8mg, 1/15--0.7mg, 1/17--0.6mg, 1/20--0.52, 1/21--0.4mg, 1/22--0.26, 1/23--0.2, 2/13--0.13mg, 2/20--0.06mg, 3/18--0.13mg, 6/1--0.12mg, 7/6--0.1mg, 7/14--0.08mg, 8/17--0.04mg, 8/20--0.03mg, 8/28--0.02mg, 9/6--0.0205mg, 9/8--0.02mg, 9/17--0.015mg, 9/20--0.01mg, 9/21--0.0048mg, 9/22--0.0001mg,

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hi

I just googled sternum and came across your thread. I see you too have had pain exactly where I am, from the clavicle to sternum?

Are you still having this and do you feel its associated with withdrawals? I am also tapering effexor.

Started Effexor August 2012 Sept'12-150mg=extreme anxiety Oct'12 cut half-75mg severe wds

Feb 2013 68.5mg. Mar'13- 65mg. Apr'13-59mg. May'13-57mg. June '13-52mg Aug'13 49.75mg.

Sep'13-48.75. Nov'13-47mg Dec'13-45..5mg

May 2014 42mg. Jun'14 40mg (depressive mood started). Aug'14 -40mg/ started brintellix 2.5mg

Oct '14 -39 Nov'14 36.89 Dec'14 34.45

Jan 2015- 31 Feb'15 29mg. Mar'15 26.72. Apr'15 24.48. May'15 22.31mg. Jun'15 20.30mg

Aug'15-18.89. Oct'15 16.96. Nov/16- 16.10. Dec/15- 15mg

Jan 2016-14.22. May'16 11.45. Aug'16-9.60. Sep/16- 8.88mg. Oct/16- 8.39mg. Nov/16- 8.13. Dec/16- 7.89

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Hi Lexy, Yes!  I am still having it!  I've had it for years.  Mostly on the left side but the other day felt it mildly on the right, too.  I notice it most when I'm sitting andworking on the computer, as I am now. And I honestly can't say that I've done anything to aggravate that area!  I was re-evaluating the pain.  It is along the clavicle but more towards the shoulder joint than the sternum, or at least it is now.  When I rub along it, it is sore all the way between sternum and shoulder.  That is very interesting that you have a similar pain!

 

I also feel so stiff when I get up from sitting, in the knees in particular. Like an old lady, and I'm 50!  My ankles can be pretty bad stiffness-wise, but I've sprained each about 6 times.  I have the drawer sign in my left ankle for sure, probably my right as well.  I'd always put all of this up to just getting older and living rather hard but now I'm thinking Effexor has something to do with this!  

 

And reckless!  I did stupid things all the time, pretty much not caring if I got hurt, never thinking "caution."  I'm thinking that was Effexor, too!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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I gotta say, today is crap!  Yesterday morning I had to help a friend with a crisis.  By the time I was heading home, I could feel a tickle in my throat and sinuses, and I thought "Oh no!!!"  The rest of the day was on the couch, feeling the sensations of a bug building.  I traditionally get really bad upper respiratory infections that settle in my throat and chest.  I hadn't gotten the flu vaccine this year because it was a partial duplicate of last year's.

 

At bedtime, I was feeling very badly, more painful to swallow and a heaviness in my lungs, cough starting.  I got into bed and then realized I hadn't taken my mirtazapine, magnesium, fish oil and inositol, or at least remember doing so, so I got up and did that.  I felt a wave of nausea and cramps, which was odd because I usually don't get nausea unless I'm having blood sugar issues, and the intestinal stuff usually happens in the  morning.  Went back to bed, put my mouth guard in my mouth, and then began salivating so much I felt like I was going to drown.  Not wanting to sleep on a slobbery pillow, I took the mouth guard out.  Took a Mucinex at bedtime as well.  Later got up having to pee and having acid indigestion, took some tums.  Couldn't sleep well, cough was hurting my throat now and congestion building in lungs.  Got up again pee again and take half a Benedryl in hopes of getting back to sleep. I normally NEVER have to get up to pee in the night!

 

I woke with  a horrid headache in my temples, and laryngitis so bad I can't talk on the phone.  I feel very down.

 

I know we blame everything on WD so ok, I'm just sick.  But I think the stress of being sick has triggered a bit of WD. I've read some say that they never got sick in WD, which doesn't make sense.

 

This brings me back to how I got put on Effexor to begin with.  Back in 2002 I got the flu really bad, couldn't sleep lying down due to the coughing for a month, and had laryngitis that long, too.  I was sick and tired of being sick!  I went to the doc and he said I had generalized depression and that i needed to go to a p-doc!  I dutifully went. If that idiot had just treated me and sent me on my way, perhaps I wouldn't be here!  GRRR-SIGH!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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I have a strong sense that muscle constriction is caused by psycohtopic medications. In my case remeron and/or xanax but I don't think it matters much which drug(s) we take, muscle problems sprains and tears come with the territory. I found the following list interesting because it is from a pro-medication site, so they mention only drug interactions. I don't know why Remeron isn't listed. They must have missed a bunch of drugs when making this list.

Drug interactions causing Muscle rigidity:
When combined, certain drugs,medicationsicon1.png, substances or toxins may react causing Muscle rigidity as asymptomicon1.png.

The list below is incomplete and various other drugs or substances may cause your symptoms. Always advise your doctor of any medications or treatments you are using, including prescriptionicon1.png, over-the-counter, supplements, herbal or alternative treatments.

  • Amitriptylineicon1.png and Fluconazole interaction
  • Apo-Levocarb and Fentanyl/Droperidol interaction
  • Apo-Levocarb and Innovar interaction
  • Apo-Selegiline and Fluvoxamine interaction
  • Apo-Selegiline and Luvox interaction
  • Bendopa and Fentanyl/Droperidol interaction
  • Bendopa and Innovar interaction
  • Carbex and Fluvoxamine interaction
  • Carbex and Luvox interaction
  • Dom-Selegiline and Fluvoxamine interaction
  • Dom-Selegiline and Luvox interaction
  • Dopar and Fentanyl/Droperidol interaction
  • Dopar and Innovar interaction
  • Effexor and monoamine oxidase inhibitor antidepressant interaction
  • Effexor XR and monoamine oxidase inhibitor antidepressant interaction
  • Eldepryl and Fluvoxamine interaction
  • Eldepryl and Luvox interaction
  • Imipramine and Tranylcypromine interaction
  • Larodopa and Fentanyl/Droperidol interaction
  • Larodopa and Innovar interaction
  • Levodopa and Fentanyl/Droperidol interaction
  • Levodopa and Innovar interaction
  • Med-Selegiline and Fluvoxamine interaction
  • Med-Selegiline and Luvox interaction
  • Nefazodone and monoamine oxidase inhibitor antidepressant interaction
  • Novo-Selegiline and Fluvoxamine interaction
  • Novo-Selegiline and Luvox interaction
  • Paxil (Paroxetine) and Eldepryl (Selegiline) interaction
  • Paxil (Paroxetine) and Marplan (Isocarboxazid) interaction
  • Paxil (Paroxetine) and Nardil (Phenelzine) interaction
  • Paxil (Paroxetine) and Parnate (Tranycypromine) interaction
  • PMS-Selegiline and Fluvoxamine interaction
  • PMS-Selegiline and Luvox interaction
  • Prolopa and Fentanyl/Droperidol interaction
  • Prolopa and Innovar interaction
  • Prozac (Fluoxetine) and Eldepryl (Selegiline) interaction
  • Prozac (Fluoxetine) and Marplan (Isocarboxazid) interaction
  • Prozac (Fluoxetine) and Nardil (Phenelzine) interaction
  • Prozac (Fluoxetine) and Parnate (Tranycypromine) interaction
  • S-Adenosylmethionine and Clomipramine interaction
  • Selegiline and Fluvoxamine interaction
  • Selegiline and Luvox interaction
  • Serzone and monoamine oxidase inhibitor antidepressant interaction
  • Sinemet and Fentanyl/Droperidol interaction
  • Sinemet and Innovar interaction
  • Sinemet CR and Fentanyl/Droperidol interaction
  • Sinemet CR and Innovar interaction
  • Venlafaxine and Metoclopramide interaction
  • Venlafaxine and monoamine oxidase inhibitor antidepressant interaction
  • Zoloft (Sertraline) and Eldepryl (Selegiline) interaction
  • Zoloft (Sertraline) and Marplan (Isocarboxazid) interaction
  • Zoloft (Sertraline) and Nardil (Phenelzine) interaction
  • Zoloft (Sertraline) and Parnate (Tranycypromine) interaction

2001-2007 Rem 90 mg, xanax 2 mg synthroid 112mcg - 2007-2014 Rem 60 mg xanax 3-4 mg

2015   Feb Rem 45 mg xanax 2 mg, March Rem 30 xanax 2, April  Rem 22.5, May Rem 30  xanax .25x4 hrs, June Rem 26 xanax 2-3, July Rem 22.5 xanax 2, Aug Rem 15 xanax 2, Sept Rem 22 xanax 2, Oct Rem 18 mg xanax .25 mg /4 hrs, Nov Rem 23 mg xanax .5mg, Dec Rem 24 xanax 2 

2016  Jan Rem 20 xanax 2,  Feb Rem 18 mg xanax 1.5, Feb Rem 14 12 mg xanax 1 mg, March Rem 10 9 mg xanax 1-2 mg Rem 7.3 8 xanax 1-2, April Rem 10 12 mg xanax 2 mg, May Rem 11 xanax 1 .75mg Nov Rem 10mg Xanax 2mg 2017 May Rem 10.25 Xanax 1 mg, November Xanax 1mg

 

 

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