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divalee - 24 months off Zoloft

Zoloft sertraline PAWS

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#289 Irvingkirsch

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Posted 13 March 2016 - 02:30 PM

Hello

Thank you for accepting me in to this group. 

I have always faced adversity and never ever took any medication.  I always felt these were life situations that all of us must face - and that there isn't a fast fix -  only time will heal - which it always had.

 

But when my son was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoma Leukemia -  I forgot all about the above and listened to my GP to take something for this pain that hurting my very soul.  So I took Zoloft and stayed on it for 8 years -  Then on December 3, 2011 - my GP and I decided it was time to start tapering off Zoloft.  Unfortunately Zoloft only comes in 25, 50 and 100 mgs in capsule form.  I had to taper 25 mgs at a time, albeit I stayed on that amount for 4 months at a time.  Took a year and a half to finally get off it, which was on May 17, 2013.

 

My tapering experience:

I had litte WDs in the beginning -  first was the dizziness, arms and legs ached, headaches, groin pain to the point where I had a hard time walking, indigestion, - all these symptoms except the dizziness and headaches disappeared.  I was coping quite well all through withdrawals - but I didn't know what was coming, was not prepared at all. 

 

When off completely May 17, 2013 -  again for a couple of months still able to cope with WDs.  Then around 6 months off - WDs seem to get worse - visual disturbances, anxiety, worsen headaches, lightheadedness - pins and needles all over my face and chin, daily migraines, tight band around my head -  DP, crying all the time -  night sweats -  morning anxiety - 

 

All these symptoms started mildly around the 6th month period off - then they just got worse and worse and around 18 months of until now there has been no let up at all.   Day after day with high anxiety, crying every day, distorted vision in one eye I think caused by the headaches.

 

I am literally in hell - and I wonder if maybe I will be like this for the rest of my life.  Also recently I have lost a person whom I love so much, never to see that person again.  I think my WDs are even worse now because of it. 

 

There is no hope left in me...- 

 

Zoloft is the only medication I have ever taken and do not take anything at all - not even vitamins. 

 

Hi, I was looking over your history here and I was wondering if you have avoided alcohol and caffeine as well as anything else that would either have a stimulating or sedating effect. I feel like if you are consuming any substances/drugs that are either stimulating or sedating you then you may just be perpetuating your recovery. I just thought I'd give you my two cents.



#290 KarenB

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Posted 13 March 2016 - 10:51 PM

And you may already have seen GiaK's blog, and her thread here, but if you haven't it's really worth a look.  She recovered after an unbelievably difficult time for many years.  It was through her blog that I found S/A.

 

Beyond Meds


2010 May Fluoxetine 20mg. Raging mostly stops, become more functional.
2011 February Escitalopram 10mg (sudden switch). 2012 January Escitalopram 20mg.  2013 Early June Feeling great, decide to taper. Doc advises alternate days 20mg/10mg for 4 weeks.  Late June Steady. Drop to 10mg daily. Early July Not coping, raging, flu symptoms, shaky, anxious, low, spaced-out, self-destructive.  Mid July Return to alternate days 20mg/10mg - minimal improvement. Early August Return to full dose 20mg. Lost.
2014 February Switch to Venlafaxine. (First reduced Esc. to 10mg/day for a week) Feb-April Lost, 'light' self-harm, exhausted.
April Increase Ven. to 150mg/day. Dizzy. July 75mg twice a day to improve dizziness. Deep depression remains.  2015 Feb Vigilant dose spacing partially eases dizziness. Mar Switch to Effexor 75mg 2x/day. May Cut 10% to 135mg - bad w/d 2 mths, held 1 mth.  Aug 1.3% cut - bad 1mth, held 1mth. Oct 4 wkly 0.4% cuts held 6 weeks. Jan 2016 2 wkly 0.4% cuts. 8 month hold. Sept Wkly cuts: 0.5%, 3 1% cuts.  Oct 4 wkly 1% cuts, hold 3-4 weeks.
Supplements: Fish oil, vitamins E & C, magnesium, iron, MSM, oat-straw tea, nettle tea.  My story of healing: ContinuedHealing

***I am not a doctor or counselor; please do your own research and be prepared to take responsibility for decisions you make.*** 

           'The possibility of renewal exists so long as life exists.'  Dr Gabor Mate.


#291 divalee

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Posted 14 March 2016 - 07:46 AM

Yes I did read Glaks blog...thank you...

Just needed to talk away some of my fears is all...doesn't seem there is a light for me....it has been too long....

Thank you
Lee (f)

Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#292 KarenB

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Posted 14 March 2016 - 05:05 PM

Oh Lee, I'm just really sorry.  Wish I could do something more. 

 

xx


2010 May Fluoxetine 20mg. Raging mostly stops, become more functional.
2011 February Escitalopram 10mg (sudden switch). 2012 January Escitalopram 20mg.  2013 Early June Feeling great, decide to taper. Doc advises alternate days 20mg/10mg for 4 weeks.  Late June Steady. Drop to 10mg daily. Early July Not coping, raging, flu symptoms, shaky, anxious, low, spaced-out, self-destructive.  Mid July Return to alternate days 20mg/10mg - minimal improvement. Early August Return to full dose 20mg. Lost.
2014 February Switch to Venlafaxine. (First reduced Esc. to 10mg/day for a week) Feb-April Lost, 'light' self-harm, exhausted.
April Increase Ven. to 150mg/day. Dizzy. July 75mg twice a day to improve dizziness. Deep depression remains.  2015 Feb Vigilant dose spacing partially eases dizziness. Mar Switch to Effexor 75mg 2x/day. May Cut 10% to 135mg - bad w/d 2 mths, held 1 mth.  Aug 1.3% cut - bad 1mth, held 1mth. Oct 4 wkly 0.4% cuts held 6 weeks. Jan 2016 2 wkly 0.4% cuts. 8 month hold. Sept Wkly cuts: 0.5%, 3 1% cuts.  Oct 4 wkly 1% cuts, hold 3-4 weeks.
Supplements: Fish oil, vitamins E & C, magnesium, iron, MSM, oat-straw tea, nettle tea.  My story of healing: ContinuedHealing

***I am not a doctor or counselor; please do your own research and be prepared to take responsibility for decisions you make.*** 

           'The possibility of renewal exists so long as life exists.'  Dr Gabor Mate.


#293 AliG

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Posted 15 March 2016 - 02:42 AM

11351220_1062645880430199_27553406150663

 

 

Lee. You will get through this. There is light. You just have to keep moving towards it .

Ali


Many SSRI's &SSNRI's over 20 years . Zoloft - 7 years .  Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and many more - on and off . No tapering. Cold turkey -  Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                            Drug free since May, 2014
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             "Find a place inside where there's joy and the joy will burn out the pain" - Joseph Campbell


#294 divalee

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Posted 17 April 2016 - 05:46 AM

Hello Everyone

Well it is 35 months that I am off Zoloft...things just seem worse, not better and I am beginning to think maybe it isn't withdrawals.  But what else can it be.  All my tests have come back normal....I am still with visual disturbances, pins and needles head, face and lips, pressure in my head and bridge of nose.  Blocked ears, although they are not blocked, light headedness, depression, anxiety, especially in morning when waking up, crying practically the whole day - nothing is getting better.  How can this be and what else can it be but withdrawals.  The night sweats are not as bad as they were maybe one or two a night now.

 

I am sorry - I am not looking for pity at all - people who know me knows this - it is just this is the only place I can vent....I keep everything to myself except for here once in a while.

 

Please someone tell me this is withdrawals because I am beginning to think I will be like this for the rest of my life.....next month will be 3 years off Zoloft.  I have never ever taken anything else....ever....my magnesium, B12, Calcium, glucose, urinalizes  everything is perfect....so what is wrong.

 

How can one live like this  =  I have been forgotten, I dont even ask for happiness, just a little less pain. I am not lonely, I experience no self pity, I am just caught up in a life in which i can find no meaning. There is nothing to struggle against, nothing to struggle for. God plays no favourites. When all speranza (hope) is gone from us - then we are free - free to just let go

 

Thank you for this place...xxx

Love

Lee (f)


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#295 AliG

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Posted 17 April 2016 - 11:27 PM

Hi Lee.     I'm sorry that you're still struggling. Unfortunately , the timeline for healing can vary to a large degree depending on individual chemistry and also personal circumstances.  You have already read some of GiaK's blog on Beyond Meds, and how long her journey to wellness has been . For some, it can be a longer road, than others. It is an inexact science .

The personal stress that you have had in your life recently could have exacerbated and possibly prolonged your recovery , a little. I know myself, that certain stressors can sometimes precipitate a wave of symptoms.

 

Have you had your thyroid and hormone levels checked , lately ?  They might be worth getting checked out . You might be experiencing a medical condition , on top of your withdrawal which could account for some of your symptoms and perhaps slowing down your progress, to an extent. Hormone issues can bring on similar symptoms, at times. I think it might be helpful to get some blood tests done.

 

Hugs,

Ali


Many SSRI's &SSNRI's over 20 years . Zoloft - 7 years .  Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and many more - on and off . No tapering. Cold turkey -  Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                            Drug free since May, 2014
.
             "Find a place inside where there's joy and the joy will burn out the pain" - Joseph Campbell


#296 divalee

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Posted 18 April 2016 - 03:19 AM

Thank you AliG

 

I have hypothyroidism - but uncontrol take medication for it....Had this before even taking Zoloft.  Also I am vitamin D deficient..I try taking vitamin D but it makes me sick.....that is all wrong with me.  My blood tests always come back perfect.

 

Yes I am experiencing a terrible loss...so maybe that could be it.

 

Thank you again for answering me.....Don't know how much longer I can deal with this any more....but will do everything I can to help myself.

Love

Lee (f)


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#297 divalee

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Posted 18 April 2016 - 03:20 AM

Sorry typo.....my thyroid is under control....not uncontrolled....xxx


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#298 coldturkmama

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Posted 18 April 2016 - 03:27 PM

Some people do take years to heal...I've read of WD journeys taking 1-3 years and some even beyond that a bit. Is anything even slightly improved?
Do you experience windows of good or is it all bad? I've read both types of recoveries...windows and waves until eventually everything becomes wide open windows and then the type of recovery where nothing is better until it is.
Keep holding on.

Paxil 20mg from 1998-2011 

Paxil 40mg from 2011-2012 while experiencing poopout

October 2013 quit cold turkey

Oct-mid Nov 2013 great window

Late November WD nightmare 

Windows and waves pattern 

Now: 28 months cold turkey...doing decent learning to deal with the windows/waves pattern fighting it every step of the way. 


#299 divalee

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Posted 19 April 2016 - 04:33 AM

Hello coldturkeymama

 

Mine there are no windows I>m afraid....if there is a window it is so slight -  I am at the depths of despair.  But no matter how bad I feel - I do what I have to do...shopping, cleaning my house the best I can.....even hair appointments, doctors appointments  I do it - but if you knew how difficult - it is beyond understanding how I do it.

 

I have a list of symptoms we can have from anxiety and panic and depression - and the list is long...and I have many of those symptoms...I know it has to be WDs...because I wake up crying and with terrible anxiety in the morning...takes all morning for me to feel a little better....

 

Thank you so much for replying to me -  it means so much....I  hope that you are doing well. 

 

Love

Lee (f)

I will try to walk this difficult road with speranza (hope) that is all that is left.xxxx


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#300 divalee

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Posted 24 April 2016 - 09:11 AM

Hello NZll

 

You wrote to a member here and mentioned CT SCANs can delay recovery (not exact words).  Well in December 2012 I had a CT Scan of my head because of severe migraines and they put a die in my veins too.....Is this why i am talking so long to get better?  Maan i hope not.....This really scared me...

 

Can you get back to me and explain a bit further please.

 

Thank you

Lee (f)


Edited by KarenB, 24 April 2016 - 02:38 PM.
merged two intro threads

Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#301 divalee

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Posted 17 May 2016 - 10:05 AM

Hello Coldtrukmama - read your post and thought I would put it here for my monthly progress report.

 

As of today May 17, 2016 I am 3 years off Zoloft -  and still suffering from withdrawals....seems worse at times, not better.  I am not looking for happiness any more - I am just looking for this pain and suffering to go away.  I do everything, go shopping, clean house, even hair dresser  but all with tremendous anxiety so bad - but I manage to control it and no one has a clue. 

 

I am so fearful - but I do it all afraid.....we must -  The only thing is I have isolated myself from all my friends and family -  I will talk on the phone to maybe two people and that is it.

 

3 years and no let up ......when tapering I coped very well with the WDs it was after I stopped around 5 months later all hell broke loose...some symptoms have gone - like no leg or groin or sciatic pain, no IBS, no indigestion....but all the rest remain.....especially distorted vision, blurry vision, pins and needles all over my face, lips and head, head pressure, feeling of blocked ears, light headedness, anxiety and panic attacks...severe sweating at night, waking up in morning with high anxiety and crying...nothing has let up....but I do everything....anyway....just when I get back in to my car I will cry...or when I get home...I cry most o f the day....and start feeling a bit better at night when it gets dark - knowing that another day has passed.

 

Maybe it is llfe>s pain also - I lost two people whom I loved so very much....and this could be delaying my healing from WDs. 

 

I am sorry for your struggles Coldturkmama...no one should have to suffer this much.....

 

If happy little bluebirds fly

beyond the rainbow

So can.......you......and........I........x   let us have courage, inner strength and speranza...and G.P.H.U...........please.....x

 

I am in such fear - but I do everything....afraid.


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#302 coldturkmama

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Posted 17 May 2016 - 12:27 PM

I'm so sorry fr your suffering as well. It ducks so much to go through this.
3 years and no let up- I can't even imagine. I am so sorry.

You do not get windows of relief??

Paxil 20mg from 1998-2011 

Paxil 40mg from 2011-2012 while experiencing poopout

October 2013 quit cold turkey

Oct-mid Nov 2013 great window

Late November WD nightmare 

Windows and waves pattern 

Now: 28 months cold turkey...doing decent learning to deal with the windows/waves pattern fighting it every step of the way. 


#303 coldturkmama

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Posted 17 May 2016 - 12:29 PM

**sucks

Paxil 20mg from 1998-2011 

Paxil 40mg from 2011-2012 while experiencing poopout

October 2013 quit cold turkey

Oct-mid Nov 2013 great window

Late November WD nightmare 

Windows and waves pattern 

Now: 28 months cold turkey...doing decent learning to deal with the windows/waves pattern fighting it every step of the way. 


#304 divalee

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Posted 17 May 2016 - 01:51 PM

The first year off was not too bad I had all of those symptoms but after a while they just got worse and it is about a year now with no windows and if there are windows they are so slight - I say that because some days I can cope better than other days.

 

I am so afraid I will never get better...but I have to have hope and courage and patience.

 

Thank yu for responding....

Love

Lee (f)


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#305 coldturkmama

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Posted 17 May 2016 - 02:08 PM

Hope is the only thing to have.
On my bad days I read my Bible and pray and hang out here a bit more. It helps to know others know what you are going through.
I hope you start to see improvements soon.

Paxil 20mg from 1998-2011 

Paxil 40mg from 2011-2012 while experiencing poopout

October 2013 quit cold turkey

Oct-mid Nov 2013 great window

Late November WD nightmare 

Windows and waves pattern 

Now: 28 months cold turkey...doing decent learning to deal with the windows/waves pattern fighting it every step of the way. 


#306 divalee

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Posted 17 May 2016 - 04:39 PM

I hope you do too....I will pray for you - I am also very spiritual - and artistic person who feels deeply for everyones pain.....because I have suffered so much in my life I guarantee you that I can walk in anyones shoes and understand their pain.

 

Stay well dear friend - I shall pray for you...xxx

Love

Lee (f)


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#307 coldturkmama

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Posted 17 May 2016 - 04:49 PM

Praying for you as well!

Paxil 20mg from 1998-2011 

Paxil 40mg from 2011-2012 while experiencing poopout

October 2013 quit cold turkey

Oct-mid Nov 2013 great window

Late November WD nightmare 

Windows and waves pattern 

Now: 28 months cold turkey...doing decent learning to deal with the windows/waves pattern fighting it every step of the way. 


#308 divalee

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Posted 18 May 2016 - 03:36 AM

I have been getting private emails from members posts here.....Is this something new....I have already received two now.  This started yesterday.  I have not given out my email address here I don't think....Just wondering is all....I know the member is not sending it voluntarily - so I thought maybe we are getting individual posts from Surviving Antidepressants.

 

Lee (f)


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#309 divalee

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Posted 18 May 2016 - 08:29 AM

divalee,

SaraInCanada has just posted a new topic entitled "Finally off Seroquel" in forum "Introductions and updates".

----------------------------------------------------------------------

I wanted to share to good news somewhere! After 10 years of being on Seroquel and feeling depressed, lethargic, unmotivated, mentally and emotionally dulled, I finally successfully tapered off of it! I've taken it in doses from 275 to 400 mg the past few years. After tapering for the better part of a year, a week ago, I took my last dose.

 

Since stopping, I've noticed the following benefits:

- My sleep is much better. Deeper, more restful.

- I don't need to sleep a ridiculous length of time and still feel groggy all day. My body wakes me up rested after about 7 hours.

- I feel more in touch with my thoughts and feelings, more myself. Even at the lowest doses during the last 3 weeks of my taper (25 mg, then 12.5 mg) it was still making me feel bad.

 

Withdrawal symptoms from the last reduction (12.5 mg to 0):

- Very itchy, especially at night - I think that's antihistamine withdrawal

 

This is at least the 3rd time in the past few years where I've attempted to taper slowly off of Seroquel, and the other times I failed at doses slightly below or above 100 mg, so this is a first for me. It might be helped by the fact that I've grown as a person, have become more connected to family and friends and society in general (feel less alienated), done some freelance work that has made me feel that I have proven I can get out there in the world and be a real person, learned to discharge trauma in my body, become more aware and mindful of being triggered into shame or rage, started to pray, and developed greater tools for enduring and working through painful emotions, e.g. journaling. Maybe fish oil is helping too, who knows. Also, the Tegretol I've been on since fall has in effect lowered the Seroquel concentration in my blood, so even though the taper was 25 mg every 2 weeks, and 12.5 mg for the last week, it was equivalent to a smaller taper, when blood concentration is con

 

I'm still on clonazepam and Tegretol, and will eventually be coming off the clonazepam, but my doctor insists we wait 3 months before starting the clonazepam taper. To make sure that if there's a problem he will know which drug to look at. I agree with the idea of giving it some time, but I also don't like the implication that the only solution to Sara's problems is another pill. He even has his "Plan B" in case being off Seroquel doesn't work - "Latuda"! I tried to talk to him about counseling or other approaches to help me before there's a crisis, but he doesn't believe that stuff is effective given the diagnosis they have pinned on me (which never felt like it grasped the nature of my difficulties). I feel like he believes in pills more than he believes in me, but that's because he's a psychiatrist. I've had to fight to get to the point where I'm on little enough medication that I can actually function. My life did not feel worth living when I was zombified - and I've never consid

 

But anyways, this is my success post. I wanted to share it somewhere.

 

Sara

 

I just got this at my private email address -  if this is the new norm can someone please tell me....I have received three now...individual emails.....thank you.......I just need to know - I attempted to answer but it comes back saying error...so please can someone tell me what is happening here....

 

Lee (f)


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#310 scallywag

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Posted 18 May 2016 - 01:02 PM

divalee -- you've probably inadvertently changed a "Follow" setting.

  1. Check your "follow" content by clicking on your username in the top right of this page. Select the option "Content I Follow"
  2. At the top of the list of Forums & Posts on the right side you'll see a gray button that says "Toggle Edit Options"  You'll now see which threads and forums are sending you email notifications.
  3. Check the box of each thread -- except your own thread! -- that indicates that a notification is sent.
  4. Scroll to the bottom of the page.  There's an option box next to the gray "Update Selected" button
  5. Choose an option that works for you, probably "Stop notifying me of updates"
  6. Click the gray "Update Selected" button.

hope that helps


This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.
1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results
Cymbalta (brand name), 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 20 mg to 7 mg in 2016, taper details in this post;
2017: 6.3 (58 beads) Feb. 1; 5.6 mg (52) Feb. 22; 5.4 mg (50) Mar. 15;
Current dose: 5.1 mg (47 beads) 2017-Mar-25
+ Supplements: fish oil (1500 mg EPA/500 mg DHA), Vitamins: D3, K2, C; Minerals: Mg, Se, Cr, I, V
scallywag's Introduction
Online spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet


#311 divalee

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Posted 20 May 2016 - 06:55 AM

Thank you, I have done that so far today I have not received any more - but yesterday after following your instructions I still had some. 

 

I am sorry to say that a very dear friend of mine has decided to go back on an SSRI, she is suffering too much.....I am just wondering if I should do the same....I am off 3 years and still suffering  - of course maybe if I didn't lose two very loved people in my life maybe these WDs wouldn't be so bad...I just don't know what to do any more

 

I went the other day to my Ophthalmologist -  my vision was distorted and blurry and is most of the time -  There is nothing wrong with my eyes....nothing....and he said stress can definitely do that.....and I know this is one of the symptoms of WDs as well....so together with the stress of losing loved ones and the WDs too.....what chance do I have....

 

Thank you for listening

Love

Lee (f)


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#312 Bruin

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Posted 20 May 2016 - 10:56 PM

Hi Divalee......I am sorry that you are suffering . .Three years is a long time and it wears you down. 

I have only had 14 months  but it feels like an eternity.

I often feel that I would go back on if it might work and make me feel well enough to get on with my life.

However this far out the outcome is uncertain. Our CNS has become sensitised.

 

I wish I had an answer for you but am here cheering you on. You will recover.

 

All the Best 

 

Bruin


Anti Depressants for  25 years. Valium between 2006 to 7 tapered off over a month without too bad withdrawals.

For last 15 years 150 mg of Effexor and 30 mg of Mirtazapine. Occasional short term benzo use without habituation.

March 2015 stopped Effexor after rapid taper. 6 weeks. 

One month fluoxetine June 2015...stopped CT July 2015.

October 2013 to December 2015 Zopiclone 15 mg at night,

Dec 2015 to Early March 2016 Lyrica 75 mg at night. 

Stopped too quickly as  adverse side effects.

January to May 2016 tapered Zopiclone to 7.5mg 

Crossed over to Valium and now ..November 20 th 2 mg Valium. February 17th 2017 at 1mg Valium. March 12th 2017. .5mg Valium.

Also on 30 mg Mirtazapine and holding until have finished Benzo taper.

IN protracted WD from Effexor.

 


#313 divalee

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Posted 21 May 2016 - 03:06 AM

Thank you Bruin......I hope I will recover.  It has been a long hard road - no one except people here will ever understand.

 

Lee


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#314 AliG

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Posted 21 May 2016 - 03:55 AM

Lee.      I'm so sorry that you're suffering, but please stay strong. It might be a short term fix, to acquiesce to the drugs, but in the long term it could be detrimental to your health. You have come so far. Don't give up, now. If you stay off them, you will most likely heal even if it's slower than anticipated or preferred. However, once you're back on them all bets are off. It could be a descent towards even more instability in the future.

Alison 


Many SSRI's &SSNRI's over 20 years . Zoloft - 7 years .  Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and many more - on and off . No tapering. Cold turkey -  Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                            Drug free since May, 2014
.
             "Find a place inside where there's joy and the joy will burn out the pain" - Joseph Campbell


#315 divalee

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Posted 21 May 2016 - 04:19 AM

AliG Thank you.........I needed to hear that......you always manage to say the right thing.

 

I will not take anything -  but I suppose some who suffer too much just cant see any other way...I can understand that too.  But yes I am 3 years off and went through hell more than anyone can imagine - .....when walking through hell keep walking - I think should be coming to the end of that hell -  God help me and everyone who is struggling so much -

 

Love, courage, support and speranza (hope) 

 

Love

Lee (f)


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#316 divalee

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Posted 25 May 2016 - 04:37 AM

Grandma

I read what you wrote to AussieGirl and boy you are spot on.  I am 3 years off and still struggling with WDs.  You and AliG have convinced me to stay strong...cause sometimes I feel maybe I should go on something......I push that though away straight away but suffering makes  you think that way....I am sorry for AussieGirl -  everyone was against her trying to ride it out and I suppose she is suffering so much - that she just gave in.....

 

Thank you again for that post and to AliG too.......bless you.

 

Love

Lee (f)

If happy little bluebirds fly

Beyond the rainbow

So can.......you.....and.....I    

 

tears are just flowing - as they do most days......xxx


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#317 divalee

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Posted 03 June 2016 - 05:34 AM

Hello Everyone

I try not to panic and come here screaming for help - I try very hard - so please forgive my weakness.

 

I am 3 years and one week off Zoloft - I never took anything else ever - I don't take vitamins nor anything at all.  Too afraid to.

 

But please someone tell me - Have you heard that some people after 3 years off that the waves can get worse..because they are worse...all the same symptoms only worse.

 

Can anyone related to this.

 

Now I have the fear of going blind - and there is nothing wrong with my eyes -  I went to see my Ophthalmologist...because of the blurred and distorted vision.....He saw nothing wrong at all.  both eyes 20/25  I wear no glasses...and can read the smallest font ...5 or even below.

 

I cry all the time - and find life is just not worth living -  I have been fighting these WDs for 3 years - not all as severe as now...and while tapering I coped very well - it was after I stopped around 5 or 6 months later - all hell broke loose.

 

I just need some encouragement - I can not even respond to anything here - I feel selfish..because I am a person that use to help many many people...

 

Please someone respond.....and I will try to be stronger - and not post such pathetic posts....I don't want pity.....I don't even want happiness......I just need to get rid of these constant waves....

 

Thank you for listening.....

Love

Lee (f)           


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#318 apace41

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Posted 03 June 2016 - 05:46 AM

Lee,

 

I am so sorry that you continue to suffer in the way that you do and have.  You are not a whiner -- you are uncomfortable and it can be hard to see hope when you are in this state.  Don't ever feel bad coming to the site for reassurance.  At some point you will feel up to being able to return to providing comfort to others and when you are able you will.  SA is never having to say you are sorry.

 

As far as your healing (or seeming lack thereof) goes, as you know everyone heals differently.  Some people have classic windows and waves and follow the "traditional" pattern.  Some people have slow incremental improvement without any setback.  Others, unfortunately, like you, feel like they are not getting any windows and even feel like they are getting worse only to find at some point that things turn around for them.  Frequently, those people have quick recoveries after they have reached their inflection point.  I firmly believe that even though you are not "seeing" it, it is happening beneath the surface and, over time, you will in fact heal and see improvement.

 

The eye situation is very tricky.  There are many reports of people having eye problems from SSRIs and, in most of those cases, those problems do resolve.  It is interesting that objective testing does not show a problem.  It is very possible that what is happening here -- and I'm just throwing this out there -- is that your brain, specifically the amygdala, is locked in a state of hyperarousal.  In that state, distorted and blurred vision is very common (think of being chased by the proverbial tiger) as your sole focus is on self-preservation.  Even though you don't feel like you are particularly anxious (you may or may not), your body is still stuck in "fight or flight".  This condition is very common when one is coming off psych meds as the anxiety response is constantly being triggered.

 

One thing you can look into (if you have not already) is one of the various "brain retraining" programs such as Ashok Gupta's program for retraining the amygdala or Lisa Wimberger's Neurosculpting.  It may be possible that by doing some work on "rewiring" your brain you can start to calm down the autonomic nervous system and see some improvements.

 

Hang in there, Lee.  I believe that things will get better for you.  I just wish it was happening sooner.

 

Best,

 

Andy


Started Sertraline 50mg and Clonazapam .375mg circa 2000; Sx Spring 2012. increased to .5 Clonazapam - no improvement; Started taper of K November 2012 (benzo sites said "taper benzo first"); increased Sert to100mg no improvement; Finished K microtaper in November 2014
Started Sertraline taper from 100mg in December 2014 by reducing to 75mg; Reduced to 62.5mg on January 1, 2015 and 50mg on February 1, 2015; Held at 50mg through April 5 when I got Rx for liquid Sertraline
Reduced dosage in 10% or less drops from 50mg to 25mg -- at single tablet on 10/5

Held through February with no noticeable change

March 2016 attempted to begin taper again but miscalculated into 1 week accidental updose to 32.5mg; dropped back to 25mg for 1 week; tapered to 22.5mg the following week; hit with symptoms and tried to stabilize between 22.5mg and 25mg.  Transitioned to all liquid for accuracy. Was dealing with horrible insomnia which had me sleeping once every other day.  Went back to 25mg liquid and held until October 1, 2016.  October 1 cut 4% to 24mg.  November 1 cut 8.3% to 22mg. December 1 cut 9% to 20mg.  Not great but functional. 2/1/17 cut 5% to 19mg.  Taking Spray-on Magnesium, Magnesium supplements, D3, Omega 3, curcumin, Co-Q10, Valerian, 81mg Aspirin, L-Theanine


#319 divalee

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Posted 03 June 2016 - 06:17 AM

Andy here you are again - thank you so much.....and I will look in to Ashok Gupta s program and Lisa Wimberger s articles...Thank you so much.....so very much. Some days I do see it - even so very remotely - xx

 

I will let you know how things go - I hope that I can continue to have courage and speranza (hope)....You have just given me some.

 

Thank you Andy

Love

Lee

xx


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#320 apace41

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Posted 03 June 2016 - 06:19 AM

Lee,

 

On a related matter, do you meditate?

 

Best,

 

Andy


Started Sertraline 50mg and Clonazapam .375mg circa 2000; Sx Spring 2012. increased to .5 Clonazapam - no improvement; Started taper of K November 2012 (benzo sites said "taper benzo first"); increased Sert to100mg no improvement; Finished K microtaper in November 2014
Started Sertraline taper from 100mg in December 2014 by reducing to 75mg; Reduced to 62.5mg on January 1, 2015 and 50mg on February 1, 2015; Held at 50mg through April 5 when I got Rx for liquid Sertraline
Reduced dosage in 10% or less drops from 50mg to 25mg -- at single tablet on 10/5

Held through February with no noticeable change

March 2016 attempted to begin taper again but miscalculated into 1 week accidental updose to 32.5mg; dropped back to 25mg for 1 week; tapered to 22.5mg the following week; hit with symptoms and tried to stabilize between 22.5mg and 25mg.  Transitioned to all liquid for accuracy. Was dealing with horrible insomnia which had me sleeping once every other day.  Went back to 25mg liquid and held until October 1, 2016.  October 1 cut 4% to 24mg.  November 1 cut 8.3% to 22mg. December 1 cut 9% to 20mg.  Not great but functional. 2/1/17 cut 5% to 19mg.  Taking Spray-on Magnesium, Magnesium supplements, D3, Omega 3, curcumin, Co-Q10, Valerian, 81mg Aspirin, L-Theanine


#321 divalee

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Posted 03 June 2016 - 07:42 AM

Andy, I am doing Mindfulness with a doctor I worked for at a hospital.  We use to sing together for patients on different occasions.  I phoned him - he is retired now - and told him about myself and he invited me over to his house together with another person...just the three of us and his wife....We meditate, we do games that need total concentration - and we sing and sing with my guitar - and his piano..music is my soul and it always helps me -  I find it hard to concentrate and it will take a while before I can master this, but I find I am improving more to concentrate doing things at the moment rather than panicking and thinking I will never get better...It helps..but it takes all my energy to go over to his house - it is twice a week so I psyche myself up to go...

 

Thank you for asking - and Andy how are you doing....

 

Love

Lee

x


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#322 apace41

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Posted 03 June 2016 - 08:47 AM

If you want to supplement what you are doing outside the home with something at home, try this:

 

http://palousemindfulness.com/

 

It's free and very informative.

 

I'm doing fair, Lee.  Thanks for asking.  I've had a lot of awful insomnia and frequently feel like I'm simply treading water.  I've reduced from 100mg to 25mg but I'm trying to stabilize before I continue to reduce.  Frankly, as you know, the whole thing is just a big, fat pain in the A** and while I have no desire to wish my life away in fast forward, I can't WAIT until I feel something like I used to.

 

Be well, Lee.

 

Best,

 

Andy


Started Sertraline 50mg and Clonazapam .375mg circa 2000; Sx Spring 2012. increased to .5 Clonazapam - no improvement; Started taper of K November 2012 (benzo sites said "taper benzo first"); increased Sert to100mg no improvement; Finished K microtaper in November 2014
Started Sertraline taper from 100mg in December 2014 by reducing to 75mg; Reduced to 62.5mg on January 1, 2015 and 50mg on February 1, 2015; Held at 50mg through April 5 when I got Rx for liquid Sertraline
Reduced dosage in 10% or less drops from 50mg to 25mg -- at single tablet on 10/5

Held through February with no noticeable change

March 2016 attempted to begin taper again but miscalculated into 1 week accidental updose to 32.5mg; dropped back to 25mg for 1 week; tapered to 22.5mg the following week; hit with symptoms and tried to stabilize between 22.5mg and 25mg.  Transitioned to all liquid for accuracy. Was dealing with horrible insomnia which had me sleeping once every other day.  Went back to 25mg liquid and held until October 1, 2016.  October 1 cut 4% to 24mg.  November 1 cut 8.3% to 22mg. December 1 cut 9% to 20mg.  Not great but functional. 2/1/17 cut 5% to 19mg.  Taking Spray-on Magnesium, Magnesium supplements, D3, Omega 3, curcumin, Co-Q10, Valerian, 81mg Aspirin, L-Theanine


#323 divalee

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Posted 03 June 2016 - 09:53 AM

Thank you for this link Andy - good to keep up the Mindfulness that I am doing twice a week at home as well.  Good idea.

 

Yes and it is a good idea to remain on 25mgs for a long while until you feel you can taper another small amount again.  I am sorry you are still struggling....

 

Stay well, and please take care of you......Be as happy as any one of us are allowed to be xx

 

Love

Lee

xx


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 


#324 divalee

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Posted 16 June 2016 - 11:58 AM

I am sorry to have to come back again.  But today my anxiety and panic attacks are terrible.  I am taking 4mg of Coversyl blood pressure pills for 3 months now...the doctor said that until my anxiety and panic attacks leave me my blood pressure will continue to be high....

 

Now my run away thinking is that maybe how I am feeling is from the blood pressure pills - even though all these symptoms I have had before I took BP pills....the Ironic thing is  many of the side effects I am having due to WDs....many side effects of the BP pills are the same....now I am worrying that it is the BP pills - 

 

I feel like I am going crazy - I don't know what to believe any more -  I know logically that all these symptoms are due to WDs.  I never feel well -  now I have IBS - constipation and then diarrhea which I have had. 

 

Why am I thinking it is the BP pills  - it is because I cant believe after 3 years and one month - I am still with WDs....they are all the same symptoms only they are worse.....Right now as I speak I am crying and panicking....

 

Many people take BP pills and they are fine.....why all of a sudden am I panicking thinking It is the BP pills.....

 

When I do close work I feel claustrophobic, my vision is distorted even though I have excellent vision...well everyone knows by now all my symptoms.....THEY JUST WONT LET UP....this is too long -  it is too long.

 

Oh please I am sorry for this weakness - I try to be strong...I try so hard....I am sure I am going to regret saying all this  -  but this is the only place I can speak - I tell no one how I feel because I have learned that people mean well but they just tell you all the wrong things or .....they just don't understand..

 

I have isolated myself - I don't want to see anyone -  I do what I have to do though no matter how I feel - 

 

I know you cant do anything for me - I know that...but at least I can vent here....I am sorry for being so weak -  I help a lot of people on facebook -  they have no idea about me at all....

 

Can someone just give me some reassurance - or something.........Thank you

 

Love

Lee

xxxx

There is no end to this hell - but I keep on walking...maybe some day I will see the way out. xxx


Zoloft started for 8 years - 150 mg capsules

Started tapering December 3, 2011,

Off Zoloft May 17, 2013

While tapering WDS were tolerable

Off Zoloft debilitating WDS the worst starting around 6 months off

even worse after 18 months off

Now 35 months off - still in a terrible wave for months now.

 

 

 






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