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#37 servadei

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Posted 31 July 2015 - 11:43 AM

Ahh thank you!! I'm having a window now!!

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#38 servadei

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Posted 31 July 2015 - 11:44 AM

I wish you all the best too! May this window doesn't go to waste.

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#39 servadei

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Posted 05 August 2015 - 12:18 AM

Hey guys. So since friday I've been feeling a lot better. But all that stress left me with with severe derealization. Is that normal?,I've never had it that bad. My dreams feel more real. Please how long will this go on... It's so hard :( I'm not even sure if this is derealization or I'm really losing it. Everything feels so unreal and I feel drunk/drugged. If I fal deeper into this I won't be able to do amything. :(

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#40 crimsonking

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Posted 05 August 2015 - 06:35 AM

Feeling of derealization is normal in withdrawal. But it gets better. I'm month and a half off and it already got better. Be patient, it will pass

#41 servadei

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Posted 05 August 2015 - 07:23 AM

Thamks, I guess I got scared because it was never this severe. I used to have it before but this is...whew...

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#42 crimsonking

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Posted 05 August 2015 - 10:36 AM

This happens naturally even outside withdrawal in the moments of great stress. Its brains natural coping mechanism

#43 Horns85

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Posted 05 August 2015 - 10:38 AM

Servadei,

How would you describe your derealization? Before I went on Lexapro, I would get it occasionally after being very anxious. It would only last for a few hours and then go away.

I have been off Lex for 10 months. At the end of month 8 I woke up one morning and it felt like a glass wall was in my vision. It's worse in the mornings and gets better in the evening but is always present. Though I do have my emotions for the most part except when it gets real bad I feel very out of it.

Anyway, not to hijack your thread hut just curious how you would describe yours?

Lexapro from October 2012-October 2014

10mg from Oct 2012-Feb 201320mg from Feb 2013-June 201310mg from July 2013-April 2014
Began taper via liquid Lexapro from April 2014-September 2014(Roughly 6 month taper)---0.00 on Oct 1 2014--WD began in December 2014

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Reinstated to 10mg - 10mg Tablet October 15, 2015 - Stable by Mid-January, 2016

(Began Taper) 5ml/mg Liquid and 5mg Tablet - March 1, 2016 10mg Total w/ daily 15b Probiotic......4ml/mg Liquid and 5mg Tablet - March 26, 2016 - 9mg Total w/ daily 15b Probiotic....3ml/mg Liquid and 5mg Tablet - May 11, 2016 - 8mg Total w/ daily 15b Probiotic...2ml/mg Liquid and 5mg Tablet - July 5, 2016 - 7mg Total w/ 15b Probiotic ....1ml/mg Liquid and 5mg Tablet - August 26, 2016 - 6mg Total.....5mg Tablet - October 31, 2016 - 4mg.... - March 6, 2017

 


#44 servadei

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Posted 05 August 2015 - 11:32 AM

Uhh, Horns85, I feel detached, things I know, like my house or grandmas suddenly feels unfamiliar, everything looks 2D, i don't feel connections to nobody, i feel traped and really weird. Being human and my conciousness feels really weird etc. It' really bad in the morning when I wake up because my dreams feel more real, and I have real feelings in them, feelings I would have if I was normal. Sometimes I check my bed to see if I really woke up. Lol

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#45 servadei

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Posted 05 August 2015 - 11:41 AM

Dortheatos... I know, I had it before... But what about people who get it out of nowhere? Or people who have it for 10 years? I never understood that.

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#46 servadei

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Posted 07 August 2015 - 01:12 PM

Guys, I'm getting better every day. Still have weird thoughts, DR, chest pains, head throbbing, face tingling, ocassional constipation and dizziness.... but the eye pressure is gone. Everyday is different but I'm able to function almost normally.

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#47 LoveandLight

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Posted 07 August 2015 - 02:05 PM

Brilliant news!
2000 - sertraline for job anxiety low confidence (17 years old) ..which turned the next 16 years into nightmare!

On/off sertraline severe withdrawals every time. 2014 - felt better as reduced dose of sertraline no more inner restlessness. Doctor rushed off again. Hit severe withdrawal. Lost the little I had in life. Couldn't get stable again on 12.5mg. Was switched to prozac. Had severe reaction to prozac..came off in November 2015 at 6mg as felt more confused and damaged on it..Even more withdrawal ..rage, depression, dyphoria, near constant suicidal ideation, self harm impulses, doom, concrete block in head, unable to do much of anything with this feeling in head..went back on 6mg of sertraline to see if would alleviate anything. It didn't..reduced from December to June 2016 came off at 2.5mg sertraline as was hospitalised for the severe rage, suicidal impulses, and put on 50mg lofepramine which in 2nd week reduced all symptoms but gave insomnia which still have..psych stopped lofepramine cold turkey..no increased withdrawal symptoms new symptoms from lofepramine except persistant insomnia which has as side effect.

Taking Ativan for 8 months for the severe rage self harm impulses 1-3 times a week (mostly 2 times a week) at .5mg. Two months (I'm unsure exactly when the interdose started to happen) ago interdose withdrawal seemed to happen..2 days I think after the Ativan.


Nightmare that could have been avoided!

#48 Horns85

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Posted 07 August 2015 - 03:25 PM

Guys, I'm getting better every day. Still have weird thoughts, DR, chest pains, head throbbing, face tingling, ocassional constipation and dizziness.... but the eye pressure is gone. Everyday is different but I'm able to function almost normally.


Great, Servadei!

What kind of eye pressure did you experience?

Lexapro from October 2012-October 2014

10mg from Oct 2012-Feb 201320mg from Feb 2013-June 201310mg from July 2013-April 2014
Began taper via liquid Lexapro from April 2014-September 2014(Roughly 6 month taper)---0.00 on Oct 1 2014--WD began in December 2014

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Reinstated to 10mg - 10mg Tablet October 15, 2015 - Stable by Mid-January, 2016

(Began Taper) 5ml/mg Liquid and 5mg Tablet - March 1, 2016 10mg Total w/ daily 15b Probiotic......4ml/mg Liquid and 5mg Tablet - March 26, 2016 - 9mg Total w/ daily 15b Probiotic....3ml/mg Liquid and 5mg Tablet - May 11, 2016 - 8mg Total w/ daily 15b Probiotic...2ml/mg Liquid and 5mg Tablet - July 5, 2016 - 7mg Total w/ 15b Probiotic ....1ml/mg Liquid and 5mg Tablet - August 26, 2016 - 6mg Total.....5mg Tablet - October 31, 2016 - 4mg.... - March 6, 2017

 


#49 servadei

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Posted 08 August 2015 - 01:53 AM

I don't know. M right side of the head really hurts and then the pressure in right eye starts.

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#50 servadei

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Posted 08 August 2015 - 01:53 AM

I don't know. M right side of the head really hurts and then the pressure in right eye starts.

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#51 brassmonkey

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Posted 08 August 2015 - 08:30 AM

That sounds like the stress headaches I use to get.  They were caused by unnoticed tight back and neck muscles and responded well to massage and heating pads.  Worth a try.


20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mg it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking


#52 servadei

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Posted 08 August 2015 - 08:47 AM

Hm yeah, I have couple of pinched nerves. Also my back hurts a lot, and my uncle told me my muscles are really stiff.

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#53 servadei

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Posted 08 August 2015 - 09:24 AM

Ahh it's not good again. Started with a small fight with a friend who is extremly rude and I endes up crying and having suic. thoughts. So much stress and I'm back with derealization now. Also feeling very irritable and angry. I don't know why. It's funny how, when you feel like this, you can't remeber anything good, onl bad memories :(

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#54 servadei

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Posted 09 August 2015 - 07:59 AM

Does anbody get this? I start to freak oit because I'm alive and conscious... Then everything becomes weird, like relationships, eating, walking and how world functions? Am i crazy? Oh and at the same time I'm afraid of eternity but I'm afraid of not existing anymore. I feel like nobody understands this and that this feelings are to weird to be fixed. Like I'm the only one who experiences life to be this weird and since nobody understands I'll be like this forever. :(

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#55 Skyler

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Posted 09 August 2015 - 08:05 AM

Merged with your main intro topic as this relates to your personal journey.


As always, LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! A proud supporter of the 10% (or slower) rule.

 

Requip - 3/16 ZERO  Total time on 25 years.

 

Lyrica: 8/15 ZERO Total time on 7 or 8 yrs.

BENZO FREE 10/13 (started tapering 7/10)  Total time on 25 years.

 

Read my intro thread here, and check the about me section.  "No matter how cynical you get, it's almost impossible to keep up." Lily Tomlin

 

 


#56 servadei

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Posted 09 August 2015 - 08:23 AM

Oh okay...I hope somebody will see this. I wanted to see if anybody shares same expriences...

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#57 Skyler

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Posted 09 August 2015 - 08:35 AM

Oh okay...I hope somebody will see this. I wanted to see if anybody shares same expriences...

 

Does anbody get this? I start to freak oit because I'm alive and conscious... Then everything becomes weird, like relationships, eating, walking and how world functions? Am i crazy? Oh and at the same time I'm afraid of eternity but I'm afraid of not existing anymore. I feel like nobody understands this and that this feelings are to weird to be fixed. Like I'm the only one who experiences life to be this weird and since nobody understands I'll be like this forever. :(

 

What you describe are the thoughts (ruminations) that attend anxious feelings.  In other words, it sounds like you are trying to make sense out of all the anxiety you feel.  You might benefit from talking therapy from someone you can sit down and talk with face to face.

 

There is more traffic in the Itro Section than any other part of the forum, so your chances of getting a response for this sort of question are greatest when you post to your Intro thread.


As always, LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! A proud supporter of the 10% (or slower) rule.

 

Requip - 3/16 ZERO  Total time on 25 years.

 

Lyrica: 8/15 ZERO Total time on 7 or 8 yrs.

BENZO FREE 10/13 (started tapering 7/10)  Total time on 25 years.

 

Read my intro thread here, and check the about me section.  "No matter how cynical you get, it's almost impossible to keep up." Lily Tomlin

 

 


#58 servadei

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Posted 09 August 2015 - 12:09 PM

Okay, thanks. To be honest I can't really talk about since I find it very hard to describe these feelings. And when I finally manage to I usually get blank looks. Heh

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#59 Altostrata

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Posted 09 August 2015 - 05:13 PM

This is what we mean when we say your nervous system is sensitized. The strong emotion of your argument caused your nervous system to over-react. See Neuro-emotion


This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

#60 servadei

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Posted 10 August 2015 - 02:16 AM

Yes, I read it. It doesn't bother me as much as it bothers me to be alive and human.

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#61 servadei

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Posted 11 August 2015 - 09:41 AM

I don't know what to do. Today we went to visit my grandma, driving for 4-5 hours was okay, I made it, but now that we are here everything feels weird. It's beautiful here, she lives in the mountains, the sea is also near but i feel so out of it. I have a big family and most of them live here but my mind won't give me a break. I feel nauseous and trapped. Like feeling of terror even though nothing's going to happen. I'm desperate, because yesterday afternoon and until I fell asleep i felt almost normal. Could it be because of the trip to different place? Also, I'm supposed to get my period in 4 days... Help please :( Everyone here is normal and happy and I can't explain to them how I feel. There are so many cool places to visit here but i don't have energy or will. :(

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#62 servadei

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Posted 11 August 2015 - 02:22 PM

I am so scared and I don't know whats going on. I just woke up. Ive never been this scared. I dont know what to do, this cant be real

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#63 brassmonkey

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Posted 11 August 2015 - 02:30 PM

It's not real Servadei, it's just the drugs playing tricks on you.  Panic upon waking is a very common symptom, it will frequently ease up as the day goes on.  Try and ignore it as best as you can and go through the motions of enjoying being with your family and let the distraction take your mind off of the bad feelings.


20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mg it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking


#64 servadei

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Posted 12 August 2015 - 11:32 AM

It wasn't morning it was middle of the night :(

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#65 servadei

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Posted 13 August 2015 - 06:45 AM

How the f can I feel so weird. This isn't even derealization anymore. I can't even describe what I feel, how is this even possible. Maybe I died and went to hell.

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#66 servadei

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Posted 16 August 2015 - 07:11 AM

I don't know what to do anymore. I can't take it. I don't belong here. Life isn't for more.


Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#67 servadei

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Posted 16 August 2015 - 07:12 AM

I've always had suicidal thoughts. But now I feel I could really do it.


Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#68 Theon

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Posted 16 August 2015 - 07:55 AM

I also experienced suicidal thoughts for the first time when withdrawing from prozac. In my case the thought was like : "I wouldn't care if I jumped out of hat window", it was not that I wanted to die, it was more that I didn't care enough to be scared of the idea of dying, I don't know it it's the same in your case.

 

I found that one thing that helps enduring withdrawal is thinking that i am doing it for someone. For me it is easier to think that I am doing it for someone rather than for me... 

 

I took my last dose of prozac more or less at the same moment as you, I also started my ADs trip last year and I think we are similar age. So feel free to send me a message for whatever you want :). you are not alone.


About me ------------------------ College student with a history of anxiety, excessive worrying and health anxiety.

April 2014 - May 2015----------    Prozac 20mg On and Off.  Second time on it I developed apathy, changes in personality, asexuality.

May 2015  -   July 2015-----------------  Tappering off prozac. Still no feelings,anhedonia, apathy, no libido, asexuality.

Current symptoms--------  pssd (asexuality in my case). Anxiety and depression developed some months afer stopping prozac, could have been caused by obsessing and beating myself up too much when I found myself unable to like girls again. The best thing to do with pssd (which in my case is asexuality) is accept it and move on.


#69 servadei

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Posted 16 August 2015 - 11:03 AM

I wouldn't kill myself but if i saw a train coming directly at me I wouldn't be scared. I also think that. I have a big family so they would probably be sad and wonder what they could've done. So if I'm already suffering at least they don't have to. I really wish I could feel like human again. DP and DR make my existence feel extremly unnatural. Like i try to imagine myself in some normal situations like faaling in love, marrying, having kids AND i can't. It feels unnatural

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#70 servadei

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Posted 17 August 2015 - 11:27 PM

Why do I feel so vulnerable? I think I'm going to burst when I think of my trip to Ireland next week. I'm so afraid and I don't know of what. Also, I want to be with my dad all the time (it's like being kid again). I've never felt like this since being little. I feel so afraid of life and I keep living in the past...so much mistakes I wish I could set right. What to do with this separation anxiety?

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#71 servadei

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Posted 18 August 2015 - 09:15 AM

Okay this is so weird and it's freaking me out. I get up in the morning very depressed, suicidal thoughts etc. but I think more clearly. Then in the afternoon/evening my face starts tingling. I feel very relaxed, but not in a good way. I feel drunk, slowed down and everything I did that day feels like a dream not a memory. This is freking me out. I become sooo tired until it's time for bed. I feel exhausted by 9pm but when I lay down my brain won't shut up. And I have the weirdest thoughts EVER. Last night I thought my trip to grandma was a dream. I'm going crazy.

Jan2014-July2015 Escitalon (escitalopram) 10mg

10/10/2015- 4 months in withdrawal, coping very hard, praying for a window


#72 Theon

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Posted 18 August 2015 - 11:37 AM

omg I can relate to this

 

everything I did that day feels like a dream not a memory.

 

For me, it is like a recent memory looks like a distant memory even when it happened some hours before.

 

For example when I think in the afternoon about what I did in the morning I feel like I did it some days ago, and not in the same day.

 

I think it is our brain changing faster than usual, so a few hours feels like days becuase our brain is not used to change so fast. (that's my theory)

 

And I also can relate to the slowed down feeling, and I prefer it rather than the restlessness feeling that I have sometimes

 

Hang in there servadei! it will take time but eventually it will get better


About me ------------------------ College student with a history of anxiety, excessive worrying and health anxiety.

April 2014 - May 2015----------    Prozac 20mg On and Off.  Second time on it I developed apathy, changes in personality, asexuality.

May 2015  -   July 2015-----------------  Tappering off prozac. Still no feelings,anhedonia, apathy, no libido, asexuality.

Current symptoms--------  pssd (asexuality in my case). Anxiety and depression developed some months afer stopping prozac, could have been caused by obsessing and beating myself up too much when I found myself unable to like girls again. The best thing to do with pssd (which in my case is asexuality) is accept it and move on.






Also tagged with one or more of these keywords: escitalopram, Escitalon, Lexapro