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Found 72 results

  1. Hello, I am Sean. Long time depression and anxiety sufferer. 36y/o, male. Have been on various meds since being a young teenager. Have taken most types of psychiatric drugs at some point. Recently been dealing with hard depression and possibly BP2 diagnosis (if that matters), and am currently on lamictal, Wellbutrin, Gabapentin and Abilify. Sadly I stopped Abilify and Gabapentin improperly a month ago, and now am worried I am going through serious withdrawals and don’t know what to do. I have been on the Lamictal for about 6 years, and 1mg of clonazepam for sleep (or bad anxiety) for maybe 7-8 years. Recently, I had been taking 5mg Abilify since last summer (mid 2017) as an adjunct to treat depression and some psychosis, and also was given gabapentin for anxiety at the same time. I took the Abilify 5mg for a while, then would stop and start as I felt it wasn't doing anything to help, but eventually took is steadily throughout the last few months of the year. I would also take the gabapentin usually in the afternoons for anxiety attack flare ups. The gabapentin was prescribed as taking 1-3 300mg capsules 3x a day (for a potential max of 2700). I usually would only take 900mg a day, and that seemed to help me feel better. For the new year, I wanted to stop the Abilify and Gabapentin, and I had been tapering down the Abilify from 5mg a day to 2.5mg, but then forgot to take it with me on my christmas trip (December 22-28) and had to just stop. I also tried to minimize the gabapentin use and don't quite remember how much I took it over the christmas break, probably semi regularly. I came home from christmas on the 28th (2017) and wanted to be off so many meds as they weren't helping the original intent. I was still on the Wellbutrin, but also had these thoughts of stopping/tapering that down too. Well as of today it's been about 4 weeks without the Abilify, and maybe close to 4 weeks without gabapentin, and I am feeling very strange. Upon returning home, I have developed early morning awakening at around 4am every day (even when taking the 1mg clonazepam for sleep) and have extreme fatigue, obviously, through the day. But as I read more about the Abilify (and then gabapentin) withdrawals, I realized that I might have screwed up bigtime in thinking I could stop them. The gabapentin I was never told had to be tapered down, I thought it was an "As needed" for anxiety med, and I had been taking only 1/3rd of what was prescribed (900mg daily instead of 2700mg). So I've been nearly a month off that. At the same time, in my goal to reduce my drug cocktail, I also thought I could take the Abilify down to 2.5mg for a few weeks, then just cut that down to zero. That's been about a month now as well. But, now that I've read all through these forums, I realize that I may have screwed up real bad. It has definitely been a rough month of emotions and symptoms, but I attributed it mostly to some emotional strain over the holidays and a general continuation of my original depression/anxiety. But now I am wondering if I have thrown myself into a total loop by cutting off those two drugs so improperly, without doctor's supervision or advice. I thought I would be ok. So right now, my quandary is: it's been a month, do I restart the drugs and try tapering over again, or do I just realize that I made a big mistake and push through it now instead of starting back over? This is what I'm afraid of, I feel stuck! And I am not sure how much my pdoc knows or is informed on these withdrawal syndromes. Plus it's really hard to get an appointment with her. I just had one this week and I didn't explain myself well (and hadn't read these forums) so I wasn't aware of the 10% rule and the other possible effects of stopping. I could use some advice or insights. I realize if I'd read these forums before, I wouldn't have stopped like this. But now that I'm a month in, I don't know if it's better to try and start back up, and then taper down, or just figure I need to live through it. I am happy to answer more questions here or in other threads. Please help, thank you!
  2. I am telling my story because if it wasn’t for reading the blogs of everyone out there suffering from the toxic effects of some of the psychotropic drugs & the subsequent “withdrawal” symptoms, I may not be here today to write this. Four years ago, I was prescribed Paxil for an off-label use. I was having symptoms which I have found out recently, can be attributed to Restless Leg Syndrome. Several months later, I became depressed (no prior history of depression) and irritable. It got worse each dose increase of Paxil. A psychiatrist realized I was having a “reverse effect” from Paxil began tapering in January 2016. I was immediately put on Abilify to help with the toxic side effects from the Paxil and also on Trazodone to help with sleep. Finally, I took my last Paxil in March 2017 and suffered through 3-months of withdrawal symptoms; crying spells and depression being the worst symptoms. I recovered and then started tapering off Abilify. Abilify caused undesirable side effects with a 20-lb. weight gain and extreme lethargy being the most bothersome. Little did I know what I was in for. I stopped Abilify at the end of August and started withdrawal symptoms 10-day later; crying spells, waking in the middle of the night feeling totally terrified and suicidal, tremors in my hands and legs, chills & hot flashes during the day, nauseous at times, loss of appetite and severe headaches. My symptoms were so frightening that my husband has kept vigil over me day and night. I haven’t driven my car or gone anywhere with out him in the past 4 months. In November I started tapering off Trazodone, because it became ineffective for sleep and was causing urinary frequency. Also, the headaches became even worse and more debilitating; OTC meds don’t help. They did a MRI of my brain and it was negative. The neurologist determined that there was no neurological cause. The early morning crying spells & headaches continue into December. I don’t know if the persistent headaches are caused by lingering withdrawal symptoms of discontinuing Abilify or tapering of Trazodone, or both. My husband called and wrote a letter last week to the Mayo Clinic to see if they can help. No answer yet as to whether they have the resources to help me get through these withdrawals. The last few days have been hopeful, the headaches seem less severe and the crying spells are less often, but I am praying that the next taper in Trazodone doesn’t cause a return of these symptoms. I feel like I have been through the worst days of my life, but I am resolved to fighting this horrible battle. It is my hope that this blog might help someone out there. Reading others’ stories has helped me immensely. Just knowing I am not alone has been a lifesaver.
  3. Abdominal pain

    Who can send me a list of abilify withdrawal symptoms? I have abdominal pain very bad. I could eat very little. I have gas in my bowels.
  4. Hello, I really appreciate seeing everyone's stories and strategies, and it helps to know that I'm not alone. I am in my late 20s and have been on and off many meds since a hospitalization for depression in 2005. By fall of 2016, when I started the “taper”, I was on 4 medications: Cipralex 20mg, Adderall 30-40 mg, Abilify 2mg and Wellbutrin SR 200 mg. The first 3, I think I was taking for around 2 years after numerous failed treatments including various meds and rTMS; however, I have been taking the Wellbutrin for 12 years. On that regimen of 4, from something like 2014-2016, my mood was generally in-check but my life was beginning to fall apart. I graduated and got a full time job in the summer of 2016, but I was having horrible energy crashes randomly during the day. Sometimes I couldn't keep my eyes open or stay seated. I struggled socially. My memory and attention were affected, and I would cry randomly. I had trouble believing it could be from the meds because they were supposed to do the opposite. In Sept 2016, I was off work and on disability. It was an incredibly confusing situation, and everyone, including myself, blamed my brain. Soon after that I began having a gradual and profound shift in perspective as I realised that meds may have been more of a problem for me than a solution. At some point in the fall of 2016, I started my withdrawal journey. First, I stopped the Cipralex over a few weeks, and became incredibly anxious. It was really horrible; I would get spells of pacing and yelling at myself. I couldn't meditate or do anything to calm down anymore. After a few months of that, I then tapered the adderall over around a month. At that point, I became really exhausted, was getting frequent (but not ER level) suicidal thoughts, and had trouble doing anything. I eventually got accepted for a volunteer job to which I had previously applied, and reinstated half of the adderall to function. However, I was scared that the tolerance crashes might come back, so my doc switched me to Vyvanse 20-30 mg. It was smoother but I was still concerned that it was not a long-term solution. I finished the volunteer job, then I read about things that other people had tried and decided to do some lifestyle changes. I stopped sugar and gluten and got outside a lot. Then I tapered both the vyvanse and the abilify at the same time over around 2 months. It was not as bad this time, and after a few more months off of them, I was mostly able to concentrate and wasn't getting very many dark thoughts. My emotional depth and variety, as well as cognition, were even beginning to improve. Once I could sort of focus again, I decided to try the paleo/keto diet and taper the wellbutrin. The problem with wellbutrin is that I have unsuccessfully tried to stop it numerous times over the past decade by following the traditional taper advice. Each time ended with me falling into an awful depression a few weeks later, and eventually back onto the med. I had been convinced that this was evidence of a chronic underlying depression, but now reading other people's stories, I'm going to be optimistic and assume that it was delayed withdrawal. So, I felt a little better on the paleo diet and dropped the WB dose from 200 mg to 100 mg on Oct 25, 2017 (right before I found this forum). I then became very sluggish with low motivation, but after a few weeks I was able to get out of bed in the morning again and do a few things. It's been 5 weeks now and no terrible-delayed-withdrawal-depression yet. I'm mostly just tired with trouble getting started on tasks. I asked for an extension on my leave from work to finish sorting this out. Surprisingly though, my difficulty connecting with people and obsessive thinking are improving in intermittently - I'm not sure yet if that's from going off the meds or from the changes in diet, but I greatly welcome it. By reading other people's success stories here, I learned that my best chance at becoming free from the Wellbutrin is to do the rest of my taper extremely slowly. I have an appointment with my doc next week to make a plan. This doc is good so it should go okay. I would be interested to hear anything from you!
  5. Hello, my name is Manny. I was diagnosed 0CD and schizophrenic in 2008, but I been taking benzos and amiptriptiline since 2005. Currently,taking abilify 20mg,risperidone 2mg,cymbalta 60mg,biperiden 4mg. I am tapering klonopin down to 0,27mg from a dose of 1,25mg. I went to see my doctor this week because a blood test that I did. He said my hepatic transaminases are high because of the medication that I take. I am assuming the APs that I take. What can I do to get my liver function well? I know, quitting the APs, but I can t cold turkey. Any advice,please.
  6. I am getting ready to begin a taper for 2 mg of Abilify, but am a bit terrified since I have tried reducing the dosage - 2 mg - before and ended up with debilitating depressive symptoms and had to return to the medication. At the time, I wasn't aware that the symptoms might have been from withdrawal and just assumed that my depression was lying in wait and the only way of keeping it at bay is to stay on the drugs indefinitely. I am finally fed up with the weight gain and the effects on my memory and want to try again to get off the medication. Has anyone successful eliminated Abilify and, if so, do you have any words of advice and/or encouragement?
  7. Cigarettes at age 11. Alcohol periodically from age 13 to age 30. Valium episodically from age 18 to age 27. I have been on myriad anti-depressants since 1982 for major depression and generalized anxiety. Imipramine, desyrel, ativan. Off drugs from 1984 till 1995. Started Prozac 1995 till 2014 (did well from 1995 to 2011). Tried Wellbutrin, Cymbalta. Abilify and Trintellix from March 2014 till August 8, 2017 (depression free). Had to withdraw due to cervical dystonia and tremors which still persist. Terrible experience withdrawing from Abilify and Trintellix. Started Wellbutrin 150 mg. and Prozac 10 mg. for one week to help with withdrawal. Then increased Wellbutrin to 300 mg. and experienced ringing in ears; stopped the Wellbutrin and increased Prozac to 20 mg. (10 in A.M.; 10 in P.M.) Now on Prozac 20 mg. per day, occasional Propranolol for tremors (doesn't help). I've read that coming off Abilify can take up to 3 months or more, and it has been 2 months so far. I feel like I've spent (wasted) my entire adult life trying to feel better, first by self-medicating, then by psychiatric medicating. I'm 72 years old. I wonder if there is any hope for me.
  8. HI everybody, I am on a monthly injection of Abilify and have so far had 4 shots.. I am on an ITO that I managed to get on whilst I was in a drug rehabilitation. They diagnosed me with 'drug induced psychosis' after being in the rehab for several weeks. This was because I was spending my money on buying filtered water on our grocery shopping trips as there is fluoride in the tap water and I have my own opinion on certain "conspiracies" about fluoride, chem-trails, New World Order, shadow government etc... I did talk alot about these topics to the friends I had made in the and next minute I was sent to the Young Adult Acute Ward. I spent 5 weeks there as they assessed me. As soon as I arrived there they put me on Xyprexa which I refused to take. Each time they attempted to give me medication I refused. I spoke to the 'Independent patient Rights' guy and he said because I was there involuntary there was not much I can do. So that is how I was put on this ITO. It took 5 nurses to hold me down for my first injection. Now I just suck it up because I know there is nothing I can do even though I can feel the poison inside of me and know what it does to me. It has robbed the best part about me. My creativity. My spirituality. My quirkiness. It has taken away who I am. I can feel it. I used to love writing poetry and struggled to put the pen down... Now I sit there with a pen in my hand and a blank mind. I can't get out of bed until 5 in the afternoon now unless I really force myself which makes me feel faint. I have put on weight (I have an eating disorder so this does really effect me mentally) I feel zombified! Is there anything I can do about this?!
  9. Hello to all! I was tapered, over a period of two months w/doctor's help, off of venlafaxine xr, buspirone, trazadone, and abilify. I had taken venlafaxine xr and abilify for 7 years and the other two for 14 years. Prior to the venlafaxine and abilify, I was on lexapro for 7 years. Considering the multiple meds and number of years of having taken them, I believe that my doctor tapered me down much too quickly. What is a real kicker is that when I contacted her to tell her I was having terrible symptoms, she diagnosed me over the phone with allergies and told me to go see my GP for further help. I did that, and he said they were all withdrawal symptoms. He assured me that time will heal me. He advised me to drink a lot of water, get exercise, and a lot of sleep. It's been over 5 months now, and I'm still symptomatic although they have reduced in minute degrees of intensity. I go from always being sick to feeling sicker and then back to being sick. My symptoms include burning, stinging, tingling skin on my arms; hot flashes (did those years ago with menopause); insomnia; lack of energy and motivation; icy-cold feeling hands, lower legs, and feet; brain-freeze feeling in the right backside of my head; and sensations of being stabbed throughout my body. The skin sensations are constant. The only thing I take now is fish oil--nothing else. When I first went off the drugs I also had terrible, intense, insatiable itching. The more I scratched, the more I itched. That has subsided, thank goodness. Has anyone experienced any similar symptoms? If so, did they eventually disappear? Did you ever experience a window? So far, I don't think I've had one. I would appreciate any help.
  10. Hi, I'm new here and would really like advice on tapering or taking my adult autistic son off of Abilify. He's 32 years old and lives in a group home and goes to a day program. Abilify is the only med he's on. 10 mg daily, other than clonazapam prn for agitation or if he has an outburst. He does have a rare disease in his knee which he takes pain meds for and also may cause sudden outbursts. He has been on many different types of meds to calm him and stabilize his mood which really havent been the answer. We just would like to try to get him off and see if he able to regulate on his own. I think the outbursts he has (infrequent but very sudden) may even be caused by the abilify. Also he's never previously really been interested in masturbation and lately this is becoming more frequent. Not that I think or tell him it's bad, but just not the norm for him. He's and adult with limited communication and mentally about the age of a 5 year old in some ways. My concern is tapering and having the staff who work with him on board to deal with any possible withdrawal symptoms, agitation, outbursts, depression, etc. Any advice or information would be greatly appreciated.
  11. upon ingestion of abilify 15mg, thoughts go 180, negitive, very negitive. any thoughts? any supplements or info would help or if changing too something else and tapering off?
  12. New to the community. Joined after reading Schizor's (forum member) story. I'll try & make this short. Hospitalized twice. (For "psychosis"). Once for a month in psych ward (Oct - Nov 2016), second time for a few weeks. (Feb 2017) For the first time, forced to take Risperidone & Abilify. Approx 10mg. After complaining it was gradually decreased down to 1mg. Upon release from ward, through trial & error, stopped one drug, tried the other & vice versa. Eventually went cold turkey off both drugs. Second hospital stay was given a shot of Invega. It seems you guys know the drill .... Zombie like feeling, loss of balance, stomach pain, pounding headache, face numbness, involuntary muscle movements, aches, sore eyes, insomnia etc ... After constant arguments, battles & calls to local pharmacists ... Decided to go off the drugs cold turkey. Again it seems you guys know the drill .... After constant nights of bad withdrawals ( a few weeks or so), kinda - sorta made it through only to still have major insomnia, lack of motivation, no energy, weird thoughts, sensitivity to lights & noise, jerky movements, aggression, a bit of sexual dysfunction & so on. Ladies & gents ..... What now ??? I feel exactly like Schizor did. Only wanna sleep but can't really, only wanna eat but don't feel satisfied, lack of emotion & stone cold thoughts, loss of character etc ..... On top of all this I have legal issues & may face jail time. A nightmare is almost an understatement when it comes to these drugs. It's also caused me to become completely paranoid of any doctor diagnosis, (psychosis !?? ... More like psychosis induced) psychiatrist, hospital, medical help of any sort. Thanks for reading (if ya did).
  13. Hi Everyone, I am new to the site as a member, but have read quite a bit so far! I am based in Texas, have been around the block a few times with meds. Currently taking lamictal and Wellbutrin and from what I can gather going through a withdrawal from Abilify. Thanks for reading!
  14. kwdeer: My story

    Hey there everyone. You can call me Fawn or Deer. I would like to share my journey with you all in this introduction. I'm hoping I can get some helpful feedback and advice on how to approach tapering off the medications I currently take. So, to start, I am 21 y/o and currently taking 40mg of Celexa, and 5mg of Abilify I also take vitamins and supplements which are listed in my signature. I think it's important to address my background briefly. I come from a very difficult background, I have been emotionally/psychologically abused by parental figures nearly since infancy up until the last few years, and had countless traumatic experiences both inside and outside of the abuse going on at home. I struggle with mental illness symptoms and physical pain, and I have since about 7 or 8 years of age. There's a lot to say, and I'm unsure of how much is relevant... I will just go into the medication aspect now. At 16, I asked my mom for help. I was experiencing severe depression and anxiety symptoms. I also suffered from an eating disorder and was severely underweight. On top of that, I was having audio and visual hallucinations. I suspect most of this was a result of complex trauma and malnourishment. I went to a hospital first, because I was suicidal. They put me on a medication for hallucinations (I can't remember the name) but it was making my symptoms worse so I didn't take it. My mom took me to see a psychiatrist, who said I was bipolar and anorexic and put me on Celexa and Topamax. The timeline is fuzzy but I think I was on these meds for a year or so before I saw a new psychiatrist through an intervention program for acute symptoms of psychosis. The new psychiatrist suspected that I had a personality disorder, and could possibly end up psychotic, so he started me on Abilify in addition to the Celexa and Topamax. I was 17. Of course, my symptoms became more manageable, and I started gaining weight (without changing my eating habits all that much, mind you). About 2 years went by. I went through periods where I felt like the medications weren't really helping me, so I would stop taking them cold turkey for a month or two. Not surprisingly, I would feel much worse and start taking them again. I was constantly pressured by my doctors, mother, and grandmother to continue taking these medications, but I couldn't help but feel like something wasn't right. I couldn't put my finger on it, though. When I was 19, the program I was in got a new psychiatrist. Around that time I had been taking my medications inconsistently, and when I told that to the new psychiatrist she said that if I wasn't taking them, they must not be working. She suggested something different. She decided to stop the Abilify, Topamax, and Celexa, saying if I wasn't taking them consistently for the last couple months it should be fine to stop them. Instead, she put me on Latuda and another medication (I can't remember the name). The next 3 months were utter chaos. I was more depressed than I had been in my life. I couldn't get out of bed, and I started eating more. A lot more. Especially sweets. I kept insisting that the new medications were making me this way. I was told repeatedly for weeks that I had to wait it out and it would get better. After 3 months I ended up in a psychiatric hosptial for 5 days. The psychiatrist at the hospital took me off the new meds and put me back on celexa and abilify. I have been on them consistently for the last 2 years. And in that time, my health has declined in many aspects. I have gained so much weight that I've gone from severely underweight to overweight in a few years. I crave sugar and caffeine all the time. I sleep a lot, sometimes 12+ hours, and I am fatigued almost 24/7. My anxiety and depression are not managed all that well, either. In doing research, I started seeing that many people taking these types of meds have experienced the same thing... and I've tried 3 times to taper off the Abilify without success. Every time, I go through severe withdrawal symptoms. I'm sick of this. I don't feel good, I don't feel healthy and I am almost certain my psychiatric meds are making it worse. I have a new therapist who is very supportive of holistic approaches to mental health and I have decided to talk to her about tapering off these meds. I want to get off Abilify first because I think that is the worst medication that I'm on. Then the Celexa. I'm really angry at the irresponsibility of the health professionals who put me on these meds and persuaded me, a vulnerable young person, to stay on them despite feeling like it wasn't in my best interest. I'm really angry at what's happened to my body and mind being on these medications. I'm angry at the system that allows this to happen. So... enough of my rambling... What does everyone think? I am open to questions, advice, anything really... help is very much appreciated. -Fawn
  15. Hey this is my first post on this site and wanted to post about ability. I feel it has made my illness, if you want to call it that, much worse than I was in the past. I am impulsive, compulsive, and more serial than I was. I feel it has torn my 20s away. I feel it is setting me back. I was alarmed when I saw lawsuits about it on commercials. Anyway I am on 10mg of abilify since April 2011. Finally had a psychiatrist convinced I need to reduce it even though she was hesitant. She increased it back to 10mg when I told her I smoked bud, which I want to stop as well. (Too much going illicit or not). I want to talk to her about going back to 7mg even though I have enough of the 5mg and 2mg to wean off of. Also, I am on 75 MG of welbutrin which I am told is the lowest dose. Also clonezepam.5 MG, 2x a day as needed. I take about 1 MG a day. I would like to first wean off the abilify. Then welbutrin. Then clonezepam. How do I go about this with the 10% reduction in meds ( I'm not great at math) and at what point do I stop smoking, or slowly wean off as well. Thanks in advance, all answers are appreciated.
  16. hello, so about 5 years ago i was taking bath salts(stupid, i know), a lot of bath salts, and i developed a symptom like bulging eyes which destroyed my life this symptom lasted for one month but already i developed an obsession with how my eyes looked to other people which is still present in my life so i got depressed and isolated still obsessing over my eyes so what to do next? with my mother persisting in going to get help i ended in a psychiatric hospital, after 5 minutes of describing the symptoms and telling the cause (bath salts) to the psy I've got my identity and the sentence, I've got BDD, body dysmorphic disorder and the sentence was 2 zoloft in the morning 1 solian(antipsychotic) in the evening we all know whats coming next, after months on this treatment I've got worse, another diagnose, bi-polar - 2 zoloft + 3 norset + 1 abylyfy + 1 solian and an extra 4 serestra and that went for 5 years which comes with psychotic episodes, attempted suicides, forced psy hospitals stays, violent behavior, unable to form thoughts and without emotions, drug use, drinking and in the process i lost my soul and after only two years I've started hearing voices, pretty scary, but i was afraid talking with my psy because of another diagnose which all know that they say is for life, schizophrenia. And after all the suffering caused by this treatment they wanted to give me more powerful dosages I'm not going in to the details, i don't want to remember, it's hard not trusting your doctor, thinking is the devil, which he is imo. It's pretty hard for me to get off this drugs because I'm being forced in to the treatment and watched every day, there are nurses which came every day to give me the meds because of my attempted suicides, so they give me a glass of water and watch me if i swallow the meds , pretty scary, i know. The doctor it's convinced that i need the treatment all my life because of my behavior. So how i came off without anyone knowing? One night (of many) without sleep i went on YouTube watching movies reviews and by divine luck I've come across a video about big pharma an psychiatric drugs which changed everything and going deep into the subject i discovered the truth, which at the time seemed fantastic and scary. I mean you think all the time that your doctor wants to help you and has years of studying this thing in school and there is the ''science'' to back all this, come on! it's a doctor, a psychiatrist, he must know things, no? and suddenly you see the other face of the coin and here comes the rage. It's hard for me to tamper because i don't have the drugs, they give me the drugs, so my only option it's going cold turkey, made them think that i swallowed the drugs, hiding them in my hand. So now I'm two weeks in cold turkey, trying to stay ''normal'' for family and doctors not to give away that you are in withdrawal, it's pretty hard. I'm going trough hell here and it's been only two weeks. I've been searching for information all this time, when I'm not in severe depression. I've found 5-htp which I'm on for 3 days now and it's good, placebo? i will take everything which will help me I've found meditation which make sense for me, but to try to concentrate on your breath for 5 minutes right now seems pretty hard, reading books on the subject helps me, I'm gonna do everything that i can to stay off the meds even if i need to die in the process.
  17. Hey all! My name is Cat (she/he pronouns) and I'm 20 years old. I've been on medication for depression and anxiety since I was 13 (7 years, what the heck). I've tried a wide range of medications since then, but I only put about the last year in my signature, There's been a lot less switching around in those years, which I'm grateful for! Recently, my psychiatrist was going to switch me to latuda from abilify. He told me to quit taking my 5 mg dose for a week, then start the new drug. That week (last week) was absolutely hellish. I had tried to come off of abilify before due to the large amount of weight gain it's caused me, but with bad results. I didn't ask my doctor about tapering this time, though - I figured he knew what he was doing and didn't really self-advocate. Horrible depressive symptoms, brain fry, fatigue, and confusion followed me stopping abilify, and they persisted even after my psychiatrist told me to go back on 2.5 mg. Yesterday he told me to start taking 5 again, and I've been feeling a little better (less like I want to die). This entire process has solidified some doubts about medication I'd been having. I'm a psychology undergraduate student in college and the more I learn about medication, the more I realize how guess-and-check the process is and how the studies don't tend to measure real-world results. I'm thinking about trying to come off some of my medications because even though they are "working" in the sense that I'm not suicidal, having panic attacks daily, and I can function fairly well, it's been so long since I haven't been a cocktail that I'm not even sure how my mood would be like not on 4 different drugs... I don't like taking and depending on this many pills. So yeah, I'm going to look around the forums and see what I can do to learn and help myself make an informed decision
  18. Hi everyone! I was prescribed Abilify for severe depression and anxiety and I have been able to slowly taper off thanks to miracle product called cysteine, highly recommend it. When I crossed 15mg of Abilify, instead of constipation I got diarrhea. Now, when I was on 9-8mg, even my genital numbness receded a little. However now, when I lowered the dose to 7.5mg, my genital numbness is even worse, I got constipation again as well as water retention. What might be going on?
  19. Hi everyone. Thanks for reading this! This is my first post but I've read a lot. I'm in the south. 28 year old male. around 3 years ago I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety disorder and started seeing a therapist and psychiatrist at the same office. I have a great relationship with both and I really trust them 100% with my care. I currently take 300 Wellbutrin, lamictal, buspar, abilify and cogentin Wellbutrin has been awesome over the years and so has buspar and lamictal. I was not diagnosed bipolar but they are using it as a mood stabilizer and it works well However over the years I've had some pretty bad circumstances and been on and off abilify. It works I guess in the way it can stop my obsessing andrew my mind slow down etc. I had been on about 10mg a year ago or so and then I stopped when I started lamictal. I had a bad turn around October last year and the cycle started again. Right now I'm on 5mg split between morning and night. 2.5mg. Oh and add the cogentin for good measure I have started to be quite foggy and started having some short term memory issues I think. The only thing we have changed in the last while was adding the cogentin and abilify back. I'm so worried my memory will not come back. I also need to talk to my pdoc this week as I want to start tapering off it. Thanks for reading! My mood was up and down and we started
  20. I am currently weaning off from both Wellbutrin and Abilify according to my psychiatrist's instructions, and I'm experiencing fatigue and loss of interest in doing anything. When I drink some strong coffee, my ability to cope and work returns, though I don't want to be dependent on caffeine either. It's my fifth day currently of not taking any medicine at all. I was told by my doctor that to return to myself without medication, it'll take about 7 - 9 days total. I'm hoping that it's just the withdrawal of medicine that's making me feel fatigued and uninterested in things, because I don't want to be like this naturally. These medicines were used to treat depression, but my doctor now suspects that I have bipolar II disorder. In case things go really bad before our appointment next week, he gave me a backup prescription of Carbamazepine -- but I really don't want to take it after reading the side effects. I was hoping that through exercise, I can cure my depressive episodes, just like some people have cured depression through rigorous exercise. I admit I am not exercising every day, but I did manage to run half a mile twice last week. I think I'm getting there, hopefully, and I'll try really hard. Essentially, I'm on a journey now to be medication-free and learn how to cope better without it (and I think I am more emotionally mature now, and all that needs to change is my energy levels and mood).
  21. Jennifer78

    Hello...I'm new to this website and I'm still not sure how this works. I'm looking for some hope I guess that's what you'd call it. I have been on meds for 15 years. Only an SSRI until probably 3 years ago. I was on Celexa 40mg, Abilify 10mg and Wellbutrin XL. I was so over medicated I felt numb and I couldn't function. I didn't know what was wrong with me & then I thought maybe it's to much medicine. I lost my health insurance on 12-01-16 so I couldn't afford all these meds so I stopped taking the Celexa & Abilify on that day. I'm still on Wellbutrin. The reason I stayed on it was I heard it would cause seizures if I cold turkey off it. I did not know I shouldn't of done that with the other 2. It will be 5 months on May 1st that I stopped other 2 meds. The only reason I went on medicine was because I lost my grandmother and I was stressed. My friend suggested I see a Dr so I did. Stupid mistake! I didn't even know Abilify was an antipsychotic until I googled it looking for answers about what was going on with me after stopping meds. I came across discontinue syndrome and then this website. Most psychical symptoms are gone and insomnia has gotten a tiny bit better but the anxiety and I guess it's depression is awful!! I don't have insurance so I can't afford to go back on the meds & go back to not functioning. I'm just wondering if I'm going to make it through this? I'm really worried. God Bless!
  22. Hello. I am twenty years old and had been on antidepressants since I was ten. From then on through my teenage years, all I knew was I needed to take my medicine . Once I was diagnosed with high-functioning autism, my pediatrician referred me to a neurologist. The neurologist then put me on respiradone and strattera. I don't remember if I had any behavior problems or not, but my neurologist told me I would have to be on medicine for the rest of my life. I stayed on those two meds until I got into high school. My first two years of high school, I couldn't stop crying. I cried day and night. My neurologist put me on celexa. When that didn't work, my neurologist told me he could no longer help me and referred me to a psychiatrist. I saw the new psychiatrist my junior year of high school who told me I had depression and anxiety that needed to be treated. I was taken off respiradone and strattera and put on pristiq and adderall. When pristiq wouldn't work, I was switched back to celexa. So it went on, switching back and forth between antidepressants. There were so many different ones I can't remember many of them. Every time I asked my psychiatrist if the next time it would work, he assured me it would. There was no chance to talk when I saw my psychiatrist. It would result in a new prescription every time. During my senior year, I helplessly slept through every class, sometimes falling out on the floor asleep. I had a good school counselor who allowed me to pass because she knew it was the medicine and I got plenty of sleep. I also cried uncontrollably almost every day in front of everyone and it was very humiliating as I would stir up a lot of attention. My senior pictures of me showed a person with a puffed up and swollen face. I was switched to lexapro again and stayed on it my whole first year of college. Then the crying returned. During my second year, I was switched to Abilify for depression. I still trusted my psychiatrist as he again promised me it would work. Out of all my experiences with antidepressants, there is nothing that could ever have compared to this. As soon as I took the first dose of Abilify, my brain signaled to me something was very, very wrong. I began receiving no sleep. My psychiatrist put me on trazadone for that, but when I took it, my body fell completely limp, my heartbeat slowed down to almost nothing, and I went numb while my body shut itself down. I stopped it after two nights. Meanwhile, with abilify, I began spending all my time obsessing over things I would normally never touch. I believed I was an alien hybrid sent from outer space to save the planet. I also believed the human race are all aliens in disguise. Then I started going mad. I didn't want to be a human anymore. I wanted to be a supernatural creature with otherworldly capabilities. This was all extremely terrifying to me, but I couldn't stop myself. I lost my common sense as I believed these nonsensical theories. My mind was overpowering me with racing thoughts such as these listed. I couldn't think clearly. I was almost always in a state of rage. Reasoning had left me. For reasons I do not remember, I stopped Abilify by myself cold turkey. My psychiatrist had told me before that I never needed to worry about tapering because the antidepressants I took were all in the same family. He never mentioned stopping completely. Withdrawal symptoms didn't show up until a week later. My psychiatrist told me they would last 15 days. They were relatively minor, and I didn't worry much about them. However, nothing could have ever prepared me for the horror I underwent next. Every horror I could have never imagined bestowed me over the course of a month. I received no sleep. I was very lucky if I got one hour. The nights soon got from bad to worse. I developed REM sleep disorder. I was unable to tell the difference between being awake and asleep. As my mind was drifting, I jumped up in the air, screamed, swung at the air, and thrashed violently all over. In addition, my head would suddenly snap up and I would shout melancholy indistinguishable language and suck in sharp breaths. I was aware of everything, but I had no control over it, and it was very disturbing to me. Then came the uncontrollable muscle movements. My lips drew up on the sides, my mouth gaped open, my lips puckered and pouted, my teeth bared, my tongue stuck out, my neck extended, my eyes bulged, my eyebrows rose and lowered, my hands flapped, my arms swung, my knees jerked, my head jerked side to side, and my fingers extended. Shouts, grunts, moans, and gasps escaped my mouth. Several weeks went by as more horrendous symptoms appeared. Every day I was a zombie. I could only do basic human activities. I had no awareness of the passage of time. At night while drifting off, a dark shadowy presence swept over me. I was aware of where I was in real time while drifting, but I sensed a sudden danger. I jumped up alert every time. I heard a voice I believed to be God's telling me why I was like this and what I needed to do. It spoke to me relentlessly for days. When this occurred, an otherworldly and overwhelming sense of peace filled my every being. But it was always soon replaced by a terror so surreal I could not function. During this time, I could "see" my brain and I believed I was in control of what I allowed to be let in. After four days of this, I ordered the voice to "Get out!" It did and did not come back. Right after this, a veil suddenly covered my mind and I was disengaged from reality. I had no sense of where I was and I had no connection with my parents. I was always mad, crying most of the time, and my head was always jerking. I saw my psychiatrist for the last time two months ago. The doctor who had been nice to me all this time suddenly turned mean. He told me he refused to see me unless I got on medicine. By this time, I had found this site and many other websites about withdrawal. I knew I wanted to try living a better life and I was not backing down. I never took the newly prescribed anti psychotic he prescribed me. A week later, my parents, exasperated with how I was doing and on their last straw, called my psychiatrist. My dad told the psychiatrist I had read on the internet how long the withdrawal really is and the doctor spoke with me on the phone. My psychiatrist told me that the withdrawal symptoms I was describing were "all in my head" because the medicine would already be out of my system now six weeks later. He told me I needed to get on medicine right now because "I needed help". He told me my quality of life was not as good without the medicine. I was in another rage episode by this time, and unlike me, I confronted him. I said "Well why are a lot of these the same symptoms I experienced during the so-called withdrawal time?" He said he didn't know and preceded to ask me was I on drugs. I was in disbelief that anyone would ask such a thing. I have not spoken to that psychiatrist since. I am dealing currently with a lot of physical and mental symptoms but none I would describe as severe as that horrible nightmare of a month. (That month just happened to be timed perfectly with my Christmas break.) My mouth, head, and fingers jerk, but never as exaggerated as they were the first month. I dealt with extremely numb fingers, feet, and ankles up until two weeks ago. My ankles at times felt like they were hanging by a single nail. My feet, bluish-green, were so numb and swollen I had no feeling and shooting pains shot up my legs. I was extremely dizzy for so long. My gp told me I have low blood pressure. I started having panic attacks. Anxiety crept over me for no apparent reason. I cried a lot. I felt hopeless. I am dealing with apathy, anhedonia, akathisia, and cognitive problems. My memory has not been well during this whole time. I am not aware; I'm just wherever I am. I have lost perception of sight, hearing, and touch. I do things I'm supposed to do because I know that's what I've always done. I cannot connect feelings to memories; I have to rely on pictures and journals from over the years. I had to look back in my journal to refresh my memory of this whole experience which I happened to write down. I have been disconnected with myself...it was worse in the beginning. I would look at pictures of myself and couldn't connect that it was me. The whole first month of withdrawal my face was so puffed up I thought my skin would fall off. Sometimes things look bigger or smaller than they appear. My thinking ability is limited. I went to my gp again three weeks ago and I was low on vitamin D. I am currently on iron medicine, vitamin d supplements, allergy medicine, and multivitamins. Although the numbness has gone away, I am extremely faint and have weak tremors every day. At night I'm miserably exhausted. My heart is always beating fast and hard. I get chills and my body tenses up. I'm not sure if I should be concerned about any of this. I cold-turkeyed Abilify four months ago. I have managed to keep my grades up in college since then and so far have maintained a perfect attendance. Some days are harder than others, but I try to count my blessings as I've heard stories far worse than my own. I am only beginning to understand what I am dealing with. The last thing I would want is to ever take another antidepressant and hinder this process. I feel like I have a real sense of myself now and I feel more in control. I have no idea how long this will last or if it will ever go away but I try to maintain a positive attitude about it as things slowly get better. I have faced the fact that I can't change my past but I can certainly shape my future. I apologize for the long story. It is difficult to get my thoughts together.
  23. I took Wellbutrin XL for eleven years. The first couple of years at 150 mg, then up to 300 mg. About 5 years ago, 1/2 of a 2 mg Abilify every 3 days was added to the mix. I actually felt fine on the meds for the most part. I briefly went off of the Wellbutrin about 6 or 7 years ago, and then went right back on because I felt like crap. I'm actually only off the drugs now because my insurance changed, and I couldn't afford the drugs out of pocket. So when I ran out, I (FOOLISHLY) quit taking them. Cold turkey. I actually still have some of the Abilify, but I didn't want to take it without the Wellbutrin. It's been about 5 long weeks, but I no longer feel like I'm living underwater. However, I still have days or stretches of the day where I have brain fog, low motivation, and anhedonia. I know I should have tapered, but I didn't. The first two weeks, I ate like a pig--totally uncontrollable, especially at night--and felt like I was in molasses. I gained weight, which has become a problem. I've never had a weight problem my entire life, and then the last 3 years, I've gained 30 lbs. Then, I started taking L-Dopa and Tyrosine, which I think helped. But now, I'm looking to rebalance my brain without more brain altering substances that leave me dependent. For the past week (on tyrosine only, decided to take a break from the L-dopa), I've been unexpectedly tearful at certain moments, which I hadn't experienced since the year after my mother died (6 years ago). These have been prompted by real emotional situations (one friend's father died and we were commiserating about losing parents; another friend's dog died and one of my dogs died a year ago December). I'm realizing that I've been partially blunted by medication for so long, I'm not sure who I am emotionally or how who I am right now will shift as my brain continues to reboot. Right now, I'm trying to focus on eating a really healthy diet and weaning off of sugar and flour. I'm still drinking alcohol, which is my next thing to try to eliminate as I try to get my brain to function "normally" and to lose weight. I fear I may have monkeyed terribly with how my brain functioned and that I may not be able to get back to the way I was 10-12 years ago, which was going through some depression, but otherwise functioning well with eating, weight, motivation, exercise, etc.
  24. I had the psychosis diagnosis in 2011. Takeing Abilify. Want to stop takeing. The next visit to doctors is at 1 mai. And i want to take action now so i dropped my dosage to 15 mg. Plan to stay on it 50 days and the drop again by half. I am a little afraid because i havent told anybody. Im afraid of criticisim and confrontation. I plan to tell my brother when we meet, he is my rock but others to tell it is complicated. I started 4 months ago also family Psychotherapy and it has helped me alot.
  25. I create this post for those who took more than 5 mg of Abilify (Aripiprazole) in relatively short period of time (like few months) as I see no other post was created according to these conditions. I'd like to know about concrete withdrawal symptoms these conditions caused, how much lasted and what you did to improve or shorten them.
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