☼ Junglechicken

[Junglechicken]

My anxiety is through the roof, can't relax.

 

Maybe everything has brought this on?

 

Freaked out by everything 

 

Help!

[powerback]

1 hour ago, Junglechicken said:

My anxiety is through the roof, can't relax.

 

Maybe everything has brought this on?

 

Freaked out by everything 

 

Help!

I hope you can see the funny side of this J ,I was sitting down relaxing after a walk last week up the hills and the peace was bliss ,but then a robin flew by and sat next to me ,I jumped out of my skin ,I was that bad ,I turned and said "you little f#cker to it LOL.

I know this doesn't help ,I hope you find relaxation soon .

Sorry J I have just realised your grieving and I apologise if I am coming across insensitive ,not my intention .sorry for your loss truly.  

[Littlegrandma]

Sorry JC. You’ve been through so much. Of course everything has brought this on. Wish I could be a voice of reason and confidence, but I’m in same way. Just wanted you to know I care and I hope you get some peace soon. 

 

I hope you got got a kick out of PB’s comment. It made me chuckle. It’s so true!!   Lg

[Junglechicken]

Thanks PB and Lg, it helped a bit.....it helps just hearing from people.

 

Currently have a few physical "grief" symptoms going on.

 

I think it's beginning to sink in that Dad isn't coming back.  I'm very irritable and this TOTM is the most painful and heavy I've had in a long time.

 

Hope you both find some relief too.

 

JC xx

[Scorpio]

Hi jc

 

hope the TOMT has eased today which could be adding to your irritability. It’s very early days with grief and your emotions will be on a rollercoaster. I hope the dreaded anxiety eases for you as you start to lose the physical symptoms. 

[Junglechicken]

2 minutes ago, Scorpio said:

Hi jc

 

hope the TOMT has eased today which could be adding to your irritability. It’s very early days with grief and your emotions will be on a rollercoaster. I hope the dreaded anxiety eases for you as you start to lose the physical symptoms. 

 

Hi Scorpio,

 

Thank you for checking in on me 

 

Have still got cramps on Day 3, but not seeing clots, and you're right, the TOTM has not helped my anxiety or irritability.  

 

Throat pain has eased a bit today, and have been sucking on Manuka honey and peppermint lozenges, as well as taking large doses of Vit C/Zinc.

 

Any improvement for you today?

[Scorpio]

Hi jc

good to hear things have eased a little.  I had a better day yesterday but had my grandson who was yet again sickening with another bug so very demanding and woke this morning with symptoms bad especially the horrible anxiety. Have to go and pick him up now from nursery so here we go again. 

[Junglechicken]

1 minute ago, Scorpio said:

Hi jc

good to hear things have eased a little.  I had a better day yesterday but had my grandson who was yet again sickening with another bug so very demanding and woke this morning with symptoms bad especially the horrible anxiety. Have to go and pick him up now from nursery so here we go again. 

 

Thinking of you Scorpio. 

 

I think just continuing to put one foot in front of the other is an achievement for both of us at the moment.

[Junglechicken]

I often think I never had proper closure with my father.  (Not counting the funeral and cremation).

 

We never had a conversation other than when I was talking to him when he was dying 

 

When my mother had been toxic with me, and I left their house very upset; Dad came out of the house and walked over to me as I was waiting in the car.  He asked me "Widge, will this make you depressed again?", and I responded "no, I don't think so Dad".  He had also asked me if I had enjoyed living in France, and I said no I hadn't.

 

And that was that.

[Junglechicken]

My physical symptoms of stress have ramped up as we move tomorrow, and the guy doing the packing is here today.

 

The GERD is back (causing the throat pain unfortunately).

IBS

Frequent urination

Vulvodynia

Body pains

Trembling

 

Not too happy 

[Littlegrandma]

JC

there are always going to be thoughts of could have, would have, should have when we lose someone we love. Your last conversation with your dad did not end on a bad note. He knows and you know that you loved each other very much. 

 

The thoughts you are having are common and part of the grieving process. 

 

My heart goes out to you. 

Big hugs  Lg

[Junglechicken]

23 minutes ago, Littlegrandma said:

JC

there are always going to be thoughts of could have, would have, should have when we lose someone we love. Your last conversation with your dad did not end on a bad note. He knows and you know that you loved each other very much. 

 

The thoughts you are having are common and part of the grieving process. 

 

My heart goes out to you. 

Big hugs  Lg

 

Thank you Lg, that means a lot 

 

Big hugs back,

JC xx

[Littlegrandma]

❤️

[AliG]

JC.  I'm so sorry for your pain ~ the stress you have been under is quite major. I understand and I empathize. However, I would like to see you try and counteract, at least some of that, with some non- drug therapy and techniques. Can you possibly, put on some soothing music... take an Epsom bath... light some candles ... burn some essential oil ... have a massage ... go for a sun walk... read a book... watch a comedy... meditate or do a guided meditation ...and the list goes on ... paint , dance... It doesn't really matter what it is, as long as it brings you some joy ~

 

You need some joy in your life ~ and I think the stress is just amplifying your symptoms. You can't underestimate the extent and magnitude of STRESS ! It can ramp up just about everything in the body, whether in W/D or not.

 

I understand the involvement with your mother and also the sadness that you have experienced with the death of your Dad, but it would be great to see you start to look after number 1, now - as you can't go on for too much longer this way, without having a complete break - down. Your father wouldn't want you to. I know you're still grieving but I would love to see you start taking just a little more care of yourself and putting yourself first, for a change.

 

Your Dad wouldn't want to see you like this and he would want you to have a happy life and remember the good times. His life and your memories, should really be a celebration of who he was and those should be the only memories that you hold, near and dear to you. Ideally, It would be happy thoughts that give you strength ~ and not drain you away, as it has been doing.

 

I hope you don't mind me saying this, honestly ... we have been friends for many years now and it's what I would probably say to you , if we were sitting together having a coffee~

 

love & ((( hugs)))

Ali

 

 

[apace41]

2 minutes ago, AliG said:

JC.  I'm so sorry for your pain ~ the stress you have been under is quite major. I understand and I empathize. However, I would like to see you try and counteract, at least some of that, with some non- drug therapy and techniques. Can you possibly, put on some soothing music... take an Epsom bath... light some candles ... burn some essential oil ... have a massage ... go for a sun walk... read a book... watch a comedy... meditate or do a guided meditation ...and the list goes on ... paint , dance... It doesn't really matter what it is, as long as it brings you some joy ~

 

You need some joy in your life ~ and I think the stress is just amplifying your symptoms. You can't underestimate the extent and magnitude of STRESS ! It can ramp up just about everything in the body, whether in W/D or not.

 

I understand the involvement with your mother and also the sadness that you have experienced with the death of your Dad, but it would be great to see you start to look after number 1, now - as you can't go on for too much longer this way, without having a complete break - down. Your father wouldn't want you to. I know you're still grieving but I would love to see you start taking just a little more care of yourself and putting yourself first, for a change.

 

Your Dad wouldn't want to see you like this and he would want you to have a happy life and remember the good times. His life and your memories, should really be a celebration of who he was and those should be the only memories that you hold, near and dear to you. Ideally, It would be happy thoughts that give you strength ~ and not drain you away, as it has been doing.

 

I hope you don't mind me saying this, honestly ... we have been friends for many years now and it's what I would probably say to you , if we were sitting together having a coffee~

 

love & ((( hugs)))

Ali

 

Beautiful words and great advice, Ali, as usual!

 

JC, as I would say in a restaurant if my wife placed an order that sounded good to me "put a 2 in front of that."  I can't add a thing to Ali's post.

 

Best,

 

Andy

[Junglechicken]

1 minute ago, AliG said:

JC.  I'm so sorry for your pain ~ the stress you have been under is quite major. I understand and I empathize. However, I would like to see you try and counteract, at least some of that, with some non- drug therapy and techniques. Can you possibly, put on some soothing music... take an Epsom bath... light some candles ... burn some essential oil ... have a massage ... go for a sun walk... read a book... watch a comedy... meditate or do a guided meditation ...and the list goes on ... paint , dance... It doesn't really matter what it is, as long as it brings you some joy ~

 

You need some joy in your life ~ and I think the stress is just amplifying your symptoms. You can't underestimate the extent and magnitude of STRESS ! It can ramp up just about everything in the body, whether in W/D or not.

 

I understand the involvement with your mother and also the sadness that you have experienced with the death of your Dad, but it would be great to see you start to look after number 1, now - as you can't go on for too much longer this way, without having a complete break - down. Your father wouldn't want you to. I know you're still grieving but I would love to see you start taking just a little more care of yourself and putting yourself first, for a change.

 

Your Dad wouldn't want to see you like this and he would want you to have a happy life and remember the good times. His life and your memories, should really be a celebration of who he was and those should be the only memories that you hold, near and dear to you. Ideally, It would be happy thoughts that give you strength ~ and not drain you away, as it has been doing.

 

I hope you don't mind me saying this, honestly ... we have been friends for many years now and it's what I would probably say to you , if we were sitting together having a coffee~

 

love & ((( hugs)))

Ali

 

 

 

Thank you Ali, I needed a pep talk.

 

We are in utter chaos right now, packing boxes everywhere and moving tomorrow, but you're right, I need to do more self-care and I have also been told that by my therapist and ND.

 

Love and hugs,

JC xxx

[Junglechicken]

7 minutes ago, apace41 said:

 

Beautiful words and great advice, Ali, as usual!

 

JC, as I would say in a restaurant if my wife placed an order that sounded good to me "put a 2 in front of that."  I can't add a thing to Ali's post.

 

Best,

 

Andy

 

Thank you Andy!

 

Best,

JC

[powerback]

1 hour ago, Junglechicken said:

My physical symptoms of stress have ramped up as we move tomorrow, and the guy doing the packing is here today.

 

The GERD is back (causing the throat pain unfortunately).

IBS

Frequent urination

Vulvodynia

Body pains

Trembling

 

Not too happy 

JC let others take on the stress ,you have hired them for that ,I know its your possessions but let go of the control somewhat  .i work in peoples homes and when I say look no worries we will sort that ,it eases pressure .

Take care .

[Junglechicken]

12 minutes ago, powerback said:

JC let others take on the stress ,you have hired them for that ,I know its your possessions but let go of the control somewhat  .i work in peoples homes and when I say look no worries we will sort that ,it eases pressure .

Take care .

 

Thanks PW,

 

I know, I know.

 

Well we are sitting watching television eating Cadburys giant chocolate buttons.

 

TC,

JC xx

 

 

[powerback]

1 hour ago, Junglechicken said:

 

Thanks PW,

 

I know, I know.

 

Well we are sitting watching television eating Cadburys giant chocolate buttons.

 

TC,

JC xx

 

 

Good 

[Scorpio]

Hi jc

 

fingers crossed for your moving day tomorrow, I hope those rotten symptoms ease for you and tomorrow brings the start of a new life for you. 

[Junglechicken]

51 minutes ago, Scorpio said:

Hi jc

 

fingers crossed for your moving day tomorrow, I hope those rotten symptoms ease for you and tomorrow brings the start of a new life for you. 

 

Thank you Scorpio 

xxx

[Junglechicken]

We're all moved in and have met a couple of neighbours and been for a lovely long walk.

 

There is a wolf sanctuary a field's length away, and you can hear the wolves howling!

 

On a bad note, my throat still hurts, feels constricted, almost as though the muscles have been strained.

 

Will have to go to the doctor for peace of mind, although it started soon after my father's funeral, so I think its a grieving symptom.

[brassmonkey]

Congratulations on getting settled in. this should be the start of something really good.  Listening to the wolves sounds fantastic.  We have a local coyote pack that lives about a quarter of a mile away and they can put up quite a bit of noise when they get going.  I love to hear it.  Got to see one just the other night, it's been a while.

 

I hope the new venue helps the throat.

[Scorpio]

Hi jc

 

congratulations on your new home, how wonderful wolves down the road, long walks, new neighbours, everything new and exciting and hopefully will help to lift your spirits. As you say I’m sure the throat is all to do with the stresses from your dad and now you are becoming settled it could well ease away. 

[Littlegrandma]

Congratulations JC

A new start in life sounds exciting. And the wolf sanctuary is awesome. We also have coyotes near us. I love to hear them howling at night. I hope that you immediately liked your new neighbors. You sound content 👍

xx lg

[Flowers]

Hi JC

 

Congratulations on your new home. It sounds wonderful and must be in the heart of the countryside if you have a wolf sanctuary closeby.  How amazing!

 

Will you be able to go to your usual GP or will you have to change to a new surgery? I think your throat problems are stress/emotionally related. 

 

I really hope things improve now you are in your new home so you can enjoy your new surroundings to the full.

 

Love from Flowers xxx

[Junglechicken]

On 25 February 2018 at 10:06 PM, Flowers said:

Hi JC

 

Congratulations on your new home. It sounds wonderful and must be in the heart of the countryside if you have a wolf sanctuary closeby.  How amazing!

 

Will you be able to go to your usual GP or will you have to change to a new surgery? I think your throat problems are stress/emotionally related. 

 

I really hope things improve now you are in your new home so you can enjoy your new surroundings to the full.

 

Love from Flowers xxx

 

Thanks so much Flowers!

 

I am now holed up in a cafe 12k from where we live so that I can use their free Wifi.  It's snowing outside and I cycled here in sub-zero temps as we don't have phone or Internet at home yet, nor do we have a second car.

 

My throat has calmed a bit, but I'm having gut/bladder issues again.  Inevitable really.

 

Seeing my naturopath tomorrow which is a relief.  

 

I registered with the new surgery some weeks ago, and will be making an appointment as need to get FSH levels checked again, and plan to get annual health checks done again.  

 

Just realised you're having your bladder scans done in the next couple of days.  Will be thinking of you my friend.....

 

Love and hugs,

JC xxx

[Frogie]

Hi JC:

 

Haven't been on. This stupid thyroid med is still in my system it's awful.

 

Just wanted to say hi.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

[Junglechicken]

23 hours ago, Frogie said:

Hi JC:

 

Haven't been on. This stupid thyroid med is still in my system it's awful.

 

Just wanted to say hi.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

 

Hi Frogie,

 

Have only got email access as hubby got back, and so he sets up blue tooth on his phone and I can use the Internet off that.

 

Physically not feeling great at the moment.  Have doctor appointment booked for 20th March to make sure these are stress/grieving symptoms.

 

Upset gut after cycling 24k in sub-zero temps yesterday, and eating a toasted sandwich which had chilli in 

 

We will have full internet and phone on Monday, thanks be to God......this has been driving me nuts.

 

TC,

JC xxx

[Frogie]

14 minutes ago, Junglechicken said:

 

Hi Frogie,

 

Have only got email access as hubby got back, and so he sets up blue tooth on his phone and I can use the Internet off that.

 

Physically not feeling great at the moment.  Have doctor appointment booked for 20th March to make sure these are stress/grieving symptoms.

 

Upset gut after cycling 24k in sub-zero temps yesterday, and eating a toasted sandwich which had chilli in 

 

We will have full internet and phone on Monday, thanks be to God......this has been driving me nuts.

 

TC,

JC xxx

JC:

 

Sorry to hear you aren't feeling well. I hope they can figure it out. Have your thyroid checked. Free T3 and Free T4, TSH, ReverseT3, UptakeT3 and your antibodies to make sure you don't have Hashimoto's.  All my numbers are fine, except my TSH. Everytime I taper it goes up. The dr thinks it is subclinical hypothyrodism.  

 

I'll talk with you soon. Let me know what happens.

 

I'll be thinking of you.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

[Junglechicken]

6 minutes ago, Frogie said:

JC:

 

Sorry to hear you aren't feeling well. I hope they can figure it out. Have your thyroid checked. Free T3 and Free T4, TSH, ReverseT3, UptakeT3 and your antibodies to make sure you don't have Hashimoto's.  All my numbers are fine, except my TSH. Everytime I taper it goes up. The dr thinks it is subclinical hypothyrodism.  

 

I'll talk with you soon. Let me know what happens.

 

I'll be thinking of you.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

 

Frogie,

 

I don't think my issues are a mystery.  

 

They all started after my father's funeral, precisely a week....so it's an emotional response coming out physically.  However, I'm just going to talk to the doctor for peace of mind.

 

Thats very good news that it's "sub-clinical hypothyroidism" as a result of tapering.

 

Co-incidentally, i had "sub-clinical migraines" in response to having CT'd Lexapro 3 yrs ago.

 

TC,

JC xxx

[Frogie]

1 hour ago, Junglechicken said:

 

Frogie,

 

I don't think my issues are a mystery.  

 

They all started after my father's funeral, precisely a week....so it's an emotional response coming out physically.  However, I'm just going to talk to the doctor for peace of mind.

 

Thats very good news that it's "sub-clinical hypothyroidism" as a result of tapering.

 

Co-incidentally, i had "sub-clinical migraines" in response to having CT'd Lexapro 3 yrs ago.

 

TC,

JC xxx

No it's no mystery. But while you are there it doesn't hurt to be checked out.

 

Keep me informed.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

[Junglechicken]

17 hours ago, Frogie said:

No it's no mystery. But while you are there it doesn't hurt to be checked out.

 

Keep me informed.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

 

I will Frogie.

 

TC,

JC xxx

[Junglechicken]

Ughh!  

 

I hate it when bruises show up and I can't recall where they came from 

 

My anxiety is bad these days....since losing Dad.

 

This one isnt very bruise-like, and looks more like a very small patch blue vein but is more prominent.

 

Everything is scaring me again.

[Dalalea]

11 minutes ago, Junglechicken said:

Everything is scaring me again

I get it! I had a tiny skin cancer 14 years ago. They got it, and I've been clear ever since.

In January, I found a spot that scared me. I made an appointment with my dermatologist and then worried away the days leading up to the appointment, which was yesterday. I had myself talked into the "fact" that she would take it off at the appointment, send it in to the lab, and I would be getting a call that I needed surgery and treatment. I couldn't shake it!

When the doctor told me it was fine and nothing to worry about, I cried a little. I had to explain to her about my SSRI withdrawal and the anxiety it has caused.

Usually, I'm not that bad, but the anxiety definitely ramps up when in withdrawal! Then comes the catastrophic thoughts, and on and on!

A doctor once told me that if I notice something odd, to wait and check it in two weeks. If it's still there or worse, have it looked at.

That works for me most of the time but not as well in withdrawal!

 

Come to think of it, I have two bruises on my leg that I have no memory of getting. My mind did the same as yours when I noticed them the other day and I started to worry about them.

I'm sure you're ok, but I understand completely what you are going through.