NaturalBorn Posted October 5, 2016 Author Share Posted October 5, 2016 Hey! I'm here to offer my support. We were on the same drug for the same amount of time and found this forum at the same time, ha. I can relate to your pain and especially to what you said about losing your youth. I'm a bit older than you (25), but I lost my first good job to this crap and I'm also in my first REAL relationship, where I really feel I want to be with this person. However, I've found a silver lining for myself. I'm still young and so is my brain. And that means my brain can heal itself faster. Also, I can't imagine the horror of going though this when you have children and have to provide for someone. At leat in your youth you're mostly responsible for yourself only. Another thing which I can relate to is the cognitive decline. I used to be a sharp girl, my quick wit and intelligence was one of my best assets, but right now I feel sooooo slow. I constantly find myself at a loss of words. But again, this symptom is normal. I don't think it's only the drugs. It's also the stress of having been through all this crap and worrying about it every second of every day. This will get better. Especially for you, hon. My boyfriend's mother is an excellent neurologist and she told me that the human brain reaches maturity at 25 and you reach your mental peak at 30. She also works with children who have suffered brain trauma and says she has seen immense improvement with time and therapy. Everything is possible. You also asked about changing your doses and reinstanting. I don't have exactly the same experience, but I was on 75mg and suddenly experienced derealisation after something I would describe as mania-ish. Then my GP accidentally gave me a presciption for 37,5mg. I unknowingly took that for a week and thought I was gonna die. I found out and went back on 75mg. A couple of months later I tapered off in a few months (way too fast). I try not to think about too much about the impact this might've had, because it's done already. This only feeds the negative 'what-if' thoughts. And these are the thoughts I'm personally having the most trouble with. Lastly, I see you're also supplementing. I just wanted to say that I've found some relief with Silexan. It's a natural lavender and lemon balm supplement which has been tested in clinical trials next to placebos and antidepressants/benzos. It has shown very impressive results in lowering anxiety. Silexan is the more expensive version, but there's also CalmAid that contains the same stuff and is a lot more afoordable. Of course, I'm not a doctor and if you decide to use this, please make sure there's no interaction with your medicine. Yesterday I took one capsule before sleep along with 500mg vitamin C and some magnesium and I didn't wake up in a state of complete panic. I still feel quite bad, but still a lot better and waking up yesterday. All in all, I'm sure we'll get through this. Every new day is another step. This may very well be the most difficult time of our lives, but it may also be the biggest lesson we've ever learned about ourselves and the world around us. What I've found a bit helpful is run daily errands and keep myself busy with something. Even though I feel agoraphobia, I still go out not to lose touch with the outside world and feed the fear. I've literally went out and been completely sure that I was gonna die or experience psychosis, but that didn't happen. I don't feel any gratitude from doing this in the the short-term, but I know this will help me heal in long-term as I won't have to start my life from scratch. yeah totally, that worring every second of your day factor, also might have a lot to do with cognitive issues.i literaly feel possessed by this drugs, i think about this 24/7, i spend more time in this site then anywhere else. and i was going to start a relationship with this girl, we actually made out in rehab and we were so in love, but in the back of my mind i always knew i wouldn't get serious with her.... and then i noticed that i don't have any libido, so i just had to just say no to her, and now she hates me, ha, i litterally can't remember that last time i had pleasure with sex, i tried having sex with a couple of girls and it was pretty pathetic, couldn't get it done haha, today was a really pathetic morning i didn't even bothered showing up to work, also didn't said anything to my uncle who was specting me for something (i do that A LOT) like with that same girl i was telling you, i was afraid she could think i was gay or something, so i just had to make all this plans with her and not show up, so that she just hated me instead of suspecting of my sexuallity... haha, about exercise, i was SO MUCH into it before it all started, my brother is actually on steroids, but after some time in withdrawal i just started smoking cigs and said whatever, now i don't think i can even run for 1 minute, what also pisses me off a lot, is that i was heavy into drugs before going into antidepressants, and i could function perfect, now i got screwed by an antidepressant, i mean who would have knew? my reputation is lost, everybody nowadays think i'm either a psycho, or a depressed baby, or just really pathetic, yeah i made this post a little personal, but this is the only place i feel safe to talk about this, anyway thanks for the kind words (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 5, 2016 Author Share Posted October 5, 2016 I am 71 have had guitars for over 40 years and still cannot play! Never mind, I'm with you on the pleasure of listening to music. Love many types - Jobim and all those other guys give great delight. Don't despair and you have plenty of time to work towards your dreams, young man. what do oyu mean with can't play? like motor problems, or like just difficulting in focusing and remembering riffs? thanks for the support (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
sarabb Posted October 5, 2016 Share Posted October 5, 2016 Hi Natural born I just want to let you know that you are in my thoughts. It is hard to find a way out, i know. I just skipped one day of drugs and my body is in completely withdrawal. I feel like they are punishing me with this. Please write to me if you need one to share your thoughts with. You are in my thoughts Sara When I was 15 years old i had a kundalini rising. It was a wake up call from what I had been my whole life, a person who always did what others told me to do and never loved anyone. I was a very scared child because my mother was always very worried. In december 2010 i got locked in a psychiatric hospital. I was there for almost a half year, they felt they could do nothing to help me. Then I got locked in again i august 2011 and got the strongest antipsuchotic drug there is, Cisordinol, its not allowed in the US. I was a zombie for one year, my psychologist said I had got a prefrontal lobotomy, that I had PTSD and the the only thing worse was war torture. My parents did nothing else than bullying me with the things i couldn´t. For a couple of years, I did nothing. I mourned over my life who I had lost and time flew as it does to those who had lost their sence of time. In december 2014 I was close to death because of the drugs. From around march 2015 things started to turn the right way for me, my near death experience was a wake up call for me, I was filled with love and accept and I met my boyfriend. I was also at a psychiatric hospital again from january 2015 to september 2015. When I got out I thought that now was my life starting to go the right way for me. I stopped with the medication from one day to another and it was the worst mistake I ever made. I was in withdrawal and I started to forget and it just continued to be worse and it still does. Along with that I got locked in again from january 2016 to may 2016. I had no other choise than to take medication otherwise they would let me do nothing. The place where I live now forces me to take medication, otherwise I cant live there and I have nowhere else to live. I had left my first boyfriend despite i still loves him and believes that we one day can be together again but I felt that he didnt understood what I was going through. I have a new friend/ boyfriend who I feel understands my feelings and that it is okay to be sad and frustrated. Whenever my mom is visiting me I just wanna vomit and thats one of my main problems. Please write to me if you find me interesting or you have experienced something similar to me. Link to comment
peng Posted October 5, 2016 Share Posted October 5, 2016 Cannot play guitar due not being able to focus on learning or devoting time to practise. Things could be worse. best wishes Born 1945. 1999 - First Effexor/Venlafaxine. 2016 Withdrawal research. Effexor. 13Jul - 212.5mg; 6Aug - 200.0mg; 24Aug - 187.5mg; 13Sep - 175.0mg; 3Oct - 162.5mg; 26Oct - 150mg 2017 9Jan - 150.00mg; 23Mar - 137.50mg; 24Apr - 125.00mg; 31May - 112.50mg holding; 3Sep - 100.00mg; 20Sep - 93.75mg; 20Oct - 87.5mg; 12Nov - 81.25mg; 13 Dec - 75.00mg 2018 18Jan - 69.1mg; 16Feb - 62.5mg; 16March - 57.5mg (-8%); 22Apr - 56.3mg(-2%); CRASHED - Updose 29May - 62.5mg; Updose - 1Jul - 75.0mg. Updose - 2Aug - 87.5mg. Updose - 27Aug - 100.0mg. Updose - 11Oct 112.5mg. Updose - 6Nov 125.00mg. 2019 Updoses 19 Jan - 150.0mg. 1April - 162.5mg. 24 April - Feeling better - doing tasks, getting outside. 7 May - usual depression questionnaire gives "probably no depression" result. Supps/Vits Omega 3; Chelated Magnesium; Prebiotics/Probiotics, Vit D3. Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 5, 2016 Author Share Posted October 5, 2016 Hi Natural born I just want to let you know that you are in my thoughts. It is hard to find a way out, i know. I just skipped one day of drugs and my body is in completely withdrawal. I feel like they are punishing me with this. Please write to me if you need one to share your thoughts with. You are in my thoughts Sara thanks a lot sara you are on mine as well, when i get of the bed i'm gonna read your story. Best of luck to you (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 5, 2016 Author Share Posted October 5, 2016 Hi Natural born I just want to let you know that you are in my thoughts. It is hard to find a way out, i know. I just skipped one day of drugs and my body is in completely withdrawal. I feel like they are punishing me with this. Please write to me if you need one to share your thoughts with. You are in my thoughts Sara omg just read what you went through.... so sorry for you, but hey, if you need anybody to talk i'm here to. any time of the day everyday... (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
fuerza Posted October 6, 2016 Share Posted October 6, 2016 Hey! I'm here to offer my support. We were on the same drug for the same amount of time and found this forum at the same time, ha. I can relate to your pain and especially to what you said about losing your youth. I'm a bit older than you (25), but I lost my first good job to this crap and I'm also in my first REAL relationship, where I really feel I want to be with this person. However, I've found a silver lining for myself. I'm still young and so is my brain. And that means my brain can heal itself faster. Also, I can't imagine the horror of going though this when you have children and have to provide for someone. At leat in your youth you're mostly responsible for yourself only. Another thing which I can relate to is the cognitive decline. I used to be a sharp girl, my quick wit and intelligence was one of my best assets, but right now I feel sooooo slow. I constantly find myself at a loss of words. But again, this symptom is normal. I don't think it's only the drugs. It's also the stress of having been through all this crap and worrying about it every second of every day. This will get better. Especially for you, hon. My boyfriend's mother is an excellent neurologist and she told me that the human brain reaches maturity at 25 and you reach your mental peak at 30. She also works with children who have suffered brain trauma and says she has seen immense improvement with time and therapy. Everything is possible. You also asked about changing your doses and reinstanting. I don't have exactly the same experience, but I was on 75mg and suddenly experienced derealisation after something I would describe as mania-ish. Then my GP accidentally gave me a presciption for 37,5mg. I unknowingly took that for a week and thought I was gonna die. I found out and went back on 75mg. A couple of months later I tapered off in a few months (way too fast). I try not to think about too much about the impact this might've had, because it's done already. This only feeds the negative 'what-if' thoughts. And these are the thoughts I'm personally having the most trouble with. Lastly, I see you're also supplementing. I just wanted to say that I've found some relief with Silexan. It's a natural lavender and lemon balm supplement which has been tested in clinical trials next to placebos and antidepressants/benzos. It has shown very impressive results in lowering anxiety. Silexan is the more expensive version, but there's also CalmAid that contains the same stuff and is a lot more afoordable. Of course, I'm not a doctor and if you decide to use this, please make sure there's no interaction with your medicine. Yesterday I took one capsule before sleep along with 500mg vitamin C and some magnesium and I didn't wake up in a state of complete panic. I still feel quite bad, but still a lot better and waking up yesterday. All in all, I'm sure we'll get through this. Every new day is another step. This may very well be the most difficult time of our lives, but it may also be the biggest lesson we've ever learned about ourselves and the world around us. What I've found a bit helpful is run daily errands and keep myself busy with something. Even though I feel agoraphobia, I still go out not to lose touch with the outside world and feed the fear. I've literally went out and been completely sure that I was gonna die or experience psychosis, but that didn't happen. I don't feel any gratitude from doing this in the the short-term, but I know this will help me heal in long-term as I won't have to start my life from scratch. yeah totally, that worring every second of your day factor, also might have a lot to do with cognitive issues.i literaly feel possessed by this drugs, i think about this 24/7, i spend more time in this site then anywhere else. and i was going to start a relationship with this girl, we actually made out in rehab and we were so in love, but in the back of my mind i always knew i wouldn't get serious with her.... and then i noticed that i don't have any libido, so i just had to just say no to her, and now she hates me, ha, i litterally can't remember that last time i had pleasure with sex, i tried having sex with a couple of girls and it was pretty pathetic, couldn't get it done haha, today was a really pathetic morning i didn't even bothered showing up to work, also didn't said anything to my uncle who was specting me for something (i do that A LOT) like with that same girl i was telling you, i was afraid she could think i was gay or something, so i just had to make all this plans with her and not show up, so that she just hated me instead of suspecting of my sexuallity... haha, about exercise, i was SO MUCH into it before it all started, my brother is actually on steroids, but after some time in withdrawal i just started smoking cigs and said whatever, now i don't think i can even run for 1 minute, what also pisses me off a lot, is that i was heavy into drugs before going into antidepressants, and i could function perfect, now i got screwed by an antidepressant, i mean who would have knew? my reputation is lost, everybody nowadays think i'm either a psycho, or a depressed baby, or just really pathetic, yeah i made this post a little personal, but this is the only place i feel safe to talk about this, anyway thanks for the kind words Sex should be last thing to worry about right now, seriously. I know it's frustrating, especially if you're young. Don't pressure yourself with stuff you're not supposed to handle right now. Your libido will come back. I can say that still having a libido is no blessing either. I've had a pretty high libido all my life and Effexor + Valdoxan made it crazy high. Right now I still have my libido, but whenever I have sex and have an orgasm, I feel very sh*tty afterwards. As for the girl thinking that you're gay. This. Is. Not. Your. Problem. I cannot emphasize this enough. Our age gap is not that big and I can remember my early twenties and teenage years very clearly. I would probably never have assumed that a guy who was having problems with sexual function was gay, but any kind of blame a young girl puts on a guy is only and only because they're still insecure about themselves. I don't mean this in a bad way, but seriously, this had nothing to do with you and everything to do with the girl probably not having enough experience and still figuring herself out. Even if a person has been sexually active for several years, it still doesn't mean that they're emotionally mature to handle questions regarding sex. Me and my friends are pretty open about sex and looking back, I can tell that most of them have become mature in the matters of sex only after university. I don't mean to sound all granny-like, but sex is very similar to friendships. Until you're emotionally mature, both friendships and sex are always riddled with insecurities and that sort of stuff. Insecurities mostly about not knowing why a problem is occurring and not knowing how to solve it. Honestly, a girl saying that a guy is gay because he couldn't get it up in my circle of friends right now would get a weird look. This is much more less ' Ha! Look, he's got a problem, he's weird' kind of a situation and much more like 'Hm, we have a problem here. Is there any way to solve it or to make him feel better about it?' issue. The best thing you can do right now is to be honest with the girl and with the people surrounding you. I understand you met the girl at a rehab clinic? If so, she should be able to understand your troubles. You also said you have a twin brother. Is he supporting you? Please don't tell yourself you're pathetic. People have no idea what kind of horror we're all going through here. I have supportive friends, but even they can't begin to fathom what I'm feeling. My mother also supports me, but the also has suggested going back on the meds in the past. What I'm saying is that no one who has experienced this **** will know what you're feeling. But you're very strong. Having read your history and also knowing that you're so young, I can say that you're extremely strong and resilient. I know what you're saying about staying in these forums all day. Same here. But let's make an effort together to go out more, even if it's for ten minutes a day. My thoughts are with you and I sincerely wish you start feeling a bit better soon. History: Escitalopram 10mg Nov - Jan 2016 (switched to Effexor XR) Effexor XR 37,5mg Jan - Feb 2016; 75mg Feb - April 2016; 37,5mg for one week in April, 75mg April-July 2016 (started tapering, took my last beads on Sept 11.) The fluctuations happened because my GP mistakingly prescribed me the wrong dosage. Oxazepam 2x10mg Dec 2015 - Jan 2016 (basically CT but no apparent symptoms); June 2016 - Feb 2017 (c/o to Valium) Current: Valdoxan 25mg Dec 2015 - Sept 2016. 12.4mg (Sept - Nov '16) -> 11.86mg (Nov '16) -> 10.75mg (Dec '16) -> 9.75mg (Jan '17) -> 8mg (March '17) -> 7mg (April '17) -> 4.5mg (May '17) -> 4mg (Jan '18) -> updosed to 4.5mg in the end of January Valium (liquid form) 8.5mg Feb 2017. 7.6mg (June '17) -> 7.2mg (June '17) -> 6.8mg (July '17) -> 6.4 (Sept '17) -> 6.2 (March '18) -> 6 (April 7 '18) -> 5.8 (April 17 '18) -> 5.6 (April 26 '18) -> 5.4 (July 16 '18) -> 5.2 (March '20) -> 5 (March '20)What to take away from all this: if you feel extremely sick only after a few doses of an AD, please tell your doctor and just stop. Adding medications is no bueno. Link to comment
tntd Posted October 6, 2016 Share Posted October 6, 2016 I'm sorry to hear about your family and your hypomanic stage. It's hard when people don't understand what's happening to us. I'm glad that you feel you can open up here though. I've found this site to be the best place to let it all hang out This thread is yours and that's what it's for. I know I read a thread about a guy who had the same sexual problem you are having. It is a definitely a withdrawal symptom and I imagine very frustrating for a young man. I do remember this young man was slowly able to develop erections again and was eventually able to have a satisfying sex life again. It's all about time. It did take this young man awhile to recover but he did. Also, like fuerza said try to stop letting what you think other people think bother you. I'm in a DBT group and one of the things they talk about is the fact that we have no idea what another person is thinking just by looking at them. Or even by their actions. We don't know what has been going on in their life or their day. So try not to worry so much about others. Take care of yourself right now. I like to watch Netflix myself. I usually love music but right now it drives me nuts, or more accurately causes me to get really anxious. Keep trying with the guitar, eventually you will find that you can play again. I imagine you may have some soulful songs to write at that point Do you hang out with your friends at all right now or have you isolated because of the way you are feeling and because of the hypomania? I'm thinking of you, {{{Hugs}}} Buspirone to 45mg, Cold Turkey St. John's Wort 600mg Jan 1, 2016. Cold Turkey Buproprion 150SR June 1 due to severe Akathisia that did not decrease with reducing the dosage. Clonazepam 1.25mg, started daily liquid micro taper of clonazepam on Nov 1, 2016. Changed to sxs based taper 01/17. Slow and steady 11/10/16 .4104 3X day; 11/17/16 .4091 3x day; 11/28/16 .406 3x day; 12/4/16 .404 3x day; 12/11/16 .4028 3x 01/12/17 .39267 3x day holding; 02/25/17 .3902 3x day, holding. .3823mg 3x day. Tapering at .0007462mg as able; 09/21/18 .3542mg 3x day. 1/3/2019 .339mg 3x day. 6/25/19 .3307mg 3x day. 8/24/19 .317mg 3x day 2/13/20 .2886mg 3x day 3/18/21 .2388mg 3x day 06/17/21 .2239mg 3x day 09/13/22 .1682 3x day L-theanine 200 mg, L-glycine 500mg 1x day and 1000mg 1x day, vit C 1000 mg sustained release 2x day. Fish oil 1800mg EPA + DHA. Vit E 400 IU, magnesium in various forms. Inositol 3x a day abt 14mg, Taurine 500mg. 5/20/16 Using Cranial Eletrotherapy Stimulation. 2x day 1 hour at level 1. Using Alph-Stim AID. Link to comment
WingIt Posted October 6, 2016 Share Posted October 6, 2016 Have you tried those colouring books for adults? Sounds silly but my wife who is going through withdrawal is getting really into them. Something to concentrate on, uses imagination, calming etc Just an idea. Also on the thinking you know what others think, this seems familier to me. My wife does this ALL the time. Picks up on little body language things that are meaningless to everyone except her and thinks the person is meaning something else. Cannot convince her otherwise. In some ways you have an advantage over her as she doesnt see that there is anything wrong with her, doesnt recognise the withdrawal so cannot rationalise with herself and try see the other side of the story. You can, you can consider if what you are thinking is right or wrong. Have you considered downloading an app called headspace on android? Its mindfullness meditation and the first 10 sessions are free. If you dont have android phone they have a website too. I tried it to encourage my wife to try it (she refuses) and its very calming and opens your eyes to all the thoughts that pop into your brain. Its not about controlling or stopping the thoughts, more recoqnising when they are happening. Again, just an idea. It wont "fix" anything but when you are having a down moment it can help pick you up Supporting my wife through Effexor XR withdrawal -Oct 2015: 112.5mg Effexor XR in morning for anxiety, 25mg Seroquol at night for sleep -March-August 2016: Her life falls apart, paranoia, insomnia, weight loss, quit her job etc -Sept 2nd 2016: Cold Turkey stopped Effexor and Seroquol -Prescribed 2.5mg Olanazapine for sleep and mood stabilisation started taking after 3 weeks withdrawal -Currently past most physical withdrawals, still low energy, still aches, but no brain zaps or dizzyness -Mental state is concerning, hates everyone, tried to annull marriage, wants to move away and start a new life -Oct 2016, beginning to see some improvement, still on 2.5mg Olanzapine, started fish oil and magnesium -Olanzapine stopped after 9 days due to constant hunger, aches, and drowsiness -5-htp added to supps alongside Fish Oil and Magnesium, sleeping 8hours naturally now 5 weeks post efexor and seroquol, 1 week post olanzapine. Still days of "psychosis" like symptoms, irritable, angry, apathetic etc Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 7, 2016 Author Share Posted October 7, 2016 Hey! I'm here to offer my support. We were on the same drug for the same amount of time and found this forum at the same time, ha. I can relate to your pain and especially to what you said about losing your youth. I'm a bit older than you (25), but I lost my first good job to this crap and I'm also in my first REAL relationship, where I really feel I want to be with this person. However, I've found a silver lining for myself. I'm still young and so is my brain. And that means my brain can heal itself faster. Also, I can't imagine the horror of going though this when you have children and have to provide for someone. At leat in your youth you're mostly responsible for yourself only. Another thing which I can relate to is the cognitive decline. I used to be a sharp girl, my quick wit and intelligence was one of my best assets, but right now I feel sooooo slow. I constantly find myself at a loss of words. But again, this symptom is normal. I don't think it's only the drugs. It's also the stress of having been through all this crap and worrying about it every second of every day. This will get better. Especially for you, hon. My boyfriend's mother is an excellent neurologist and she told me that the human brain reaches maturity at 25 and you reach your mental peak at 30. She also works with children who have suffered brain trauma and says she has seen immense improvement with time and therapy. Everything is possible. You also asked about changing your doses and reinstanting. I don't have exactly the same experience, but I was on 75mg and suddenly experienced derealisation after something I would describe as mania-ish. Then my GP accidentally gave me a presciption for 37,5mg. I unknowingly took that for a week and thought I was gonna die. I found out and went back on 75mg. A couple of months later I tapered off in a few months (way too fast). I try not to think about too much about the impact this might've had, because it's done already. This only feeds the negative 'what-if' thoughts. And these are the thoughts I'm personally having the most trouble with. Lastly, I see you're also supplementing. I just wanted to say that I've found some relief with Silexan. It's a natural lavender and lemon balm supplement which has been tested in clinical trials next to placebos and antidepressants/benzos. It has shown very impressive results in lowering anxiety. Silexan is the more expensive version, but there's also CalmAid that contains the same stuff and is a lot more afoordable. Of course, I'm not a doctor and if you decide to use this, please make sure there's no interaction with your medicine. Yesterday I took one capsule before sleep along with 500mg vitamin C and some magnesium and I didn't wake up in a state of complete panic. I still feel quite bad, but still a lot better and waking up yesterday. All in all, I'm sure we'll get through this. Every new day is another step. This may very well be the most difficult time of our lives, but it may also be the biggest lesson we've ever learned about ourselves and the world around us. What I've found a bit helpful is run daily errands and keep myself busy with something. Even though I feel agoraphobia, I still go out not to lose touch with the outside world and feed the fear. I've literally went out and been completely sure that I was gonna die or experience psychosis, but that didn't happen. I don't feel any gratitude from doing this in the the short-term, but I know this will help me heal in long-term as I won't have to start my life from scratch. yeah totally, that worring every second of your day factor, also might have a lot to do with cognitive issues.i literaly feel possessed by this drugs, i think about this 24/7, i spend more time in this site then anywhere else. and i was going to start a relationship with this girl, we actually made out in rehab and we were so in love, but in the back of my mind i always knew i wouldn't get serious with her.... and then i noticed that i don't have any libido, so i just had to just say no to her, and now she hates me, ha, i litterally can't remember that last time i had pleasure with sex, i tried having sex with a couple of girls and it was pretty pathetic, couldn't get it done haha, today was a really pathetic morning i didn't even bothered showing up to work, also didn't said anything to my uncle who was specting me for something (i do that A LOT) like with that same girl i was telling you, i was afraid she could think i was gay or something, so i just had to make all this plans with her and not show up, so that she just hated me instead of suspecting of my sexuallity... haha, about exercise, i was SO MUCH into it before it all started, my brother is actually on steroids, but after some time in withdrawal i just started smoking cigs and said whatever, now i don't think i can even run for 1 minute, what also pisses me off a lot, is that i was heavy into drugs before going into antidepressants, and i could function perfect, now i got screwed by an antidepressant, i mean who would have knew? my reputation is lost, everybody nowadays think i'm either a psycho, or a depressed baby, or just really pathetic, yeah i made this post a little personal, but this is the only place i feel safe to talk about this, anyway thanks for the kind words Sex should be last thing to worry about right now, seriously. I know it's frustrating, especially if you're young. Don't pressure yourself with stuff you're not supposed to handle right now. Your libido will come back. I can say that still having a libido is no blessing either. I've had a pretty high libido all my life and Effexor + Valdoxan made it crazy high. Right now I still have my libido, but whenever I have sex and have an orgasm, I feel very sh*tty afterwards. As for the girl thinking that you're gay. This. Is. Not. Your. Problem. I cannot emphasize this enough. Our age gap is not that big and I can remember my early twenties and teenage years very clearly. I would probably never have assumed that a guy who was having problems with sexual function was gay, but any kind of blame a young girl puts on a guy is only and only because they're still insecure about themselves. I don't mean this in a bad way, but seriously, this had nothing to do with you and everything to do with the girl probably not having enough experience and still figuring herself out. Even if a person has been sexually active for several years, it still doesn't mean that they're emotionally mature to handle questions regarding sex. Me and my friends are pretty open about sex and looking back, I can tell that most of them have become mature in the matters of sex only after university. I don't mean to sound all granny-like, but sex is very similar to friendships. Until you're emotionally mature, both friendships and sex are always riddled with insecurities and that sort of stuff. Insecurities mostly about not knowing why a problem is occurring and not knowing how to solve it. Honestly, a girl saying that a guy is gay because he couldn't get it up in my circle of friends right now would get a weird look. This is much more less ' Ha! Look, he's got a problem, he's weird' kind of a situation and much more like 'Hm, we have a problem here. Is there any way to solve it or to make him feel better about it?' issue. The best thing you can do right now is to be honest with the girl and with the people surrounding you. I understand you met the girl at a rehab clinic? If so, she should be able to understand your troubles. You also said you have a twin brother. Is he supporting you? Please don't tell yourself you're pathetic. People have no idea what kind of horror we're all going through here. I have supportive friends, but even they can't begin to fathom what I'm feeling. My mother also supports me, but the also has suggested going back on the meds in the past. What I'm saying is that no one who has experienced this **** will know what you're feeling. But you're very strong. Having read your history and also knowing that you're so young, I can say that you're extremely strong and resilient. I know what you're saying about staying in these forums all day. Same here. But let's make an effort together to go out more, even if it's for ten minutes a day. My thoughts are with you and I sincerely wish you start feeling a bit better soon. damm right no one has a clue, everytime i see someone complainning about a regular minimal health problem , i think to myself "damm, imagine if they knew how this feels", and about people who support me, i don't know how i feel about that, you know, because all they think is that i'm just really depressed, they simply can't understand that medication made something bad to me no matter who i try explaining to them, even when i was four days without sleep while traviling with my father, he just didn't recognised it as something more than just regular "tension" or "anxiety". plus being a young man and having sort of a invencible complex makes it harder to move on, having everyone concerned about you, and knowing that you are not on your 100% of capacity, and hability to just be good at something... people now can just see me as lazy, sad and slow, so i try faking it up, sometimes its hard.they say that i act like i was 80 years old or somethign, it's just SO HARD to see people moving on easilly with their lives while you are being tortured, i can almost say that i feel jealous over them. i have a friend who had a REALLY bad manic episode, and was sent to a psych ward, i tried talking to him, and he just feels good about medication. he actually asked me how can i have a problem with this... yeah sex is not my priority right now, and this makes me feel kind of bad too, i guess being 20 makes it kind of worse. but anyway i'm trying to go on... trying to cut my smoking a little bit, and thinking about going to a psychatrist without telling my mom about it, this way i can just quit my meds and get this over with as soon as possible. i can't take this anymore. thanks A LOT for the support, again i don't know how i would be doing if it wasn't by internet and you guys! (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 7, 2016 Author Share Posted October 7, 2016 I'm sorry to hear about your family and your hypomanic stage. It's hard when people don't understand what's happening to us. I'm glad that you feel you can open up here though. I've found this site to be the best place to let it all hang out This thread is yours and that's what it's for. I know I read a thread about a guy who had the same sexual problem you are having. It is a definitely a withdrawal symptom and I imagine very frustrating for a young man. I do remember this young man was slowly able to develop erections again and was eventually able to have a satisfying sex life again. It's all about time. It did take this young man awhile to recover but he did. Also, like fuerza said try to stop letting what you think other people think bother you. I'm in a DBT group and one of the things they talk about is the fact that we have no idea what another person is thinking just by looking at them. Or even by their actions. We don't know what has been going on in their life or their day. So try not to worry so much about others. Take care of yourself right now. I like to watch Netflix myself. I usually love music but right now it drives me nuts, or more accurately causes me to get really anxious. Keep trying with the guitar, eventually you will find that you can play again. I imagine you may have some soulful songs to write at that point Do you hang out with your friends at all right now or have you isolated because of the way you are feeling and because of the hypomania? I'm thinking of you, {{{Hugs}}} yeah i think the libido will probably come back, or else i can just use viagra, that is not really on my main concerns list, this is a symptom that just started being a serious problem like a couple of months ago, it was a little bit there during my first withdrawal, but now it just came 100%, so i think that this will pass someitm in the future. damm, i must just say that it must be bad not being able to enjoy music as usual, sorry for that, sometimes when i hear a part of a lyrics that in the past made me feel great about myself or confident, now it can make me feel a little bit anxious and bad about myself, like if i failed really bad in a way. about my friends i actually stopped talking to 80% of them,and spend MUCH more time in the house or in my bed right now, but today i saw my brother picking the car keys and asked where he was going, he was going out with some friends, so i decided to go to, just to keep up the looks, but i actually had a great time, i smoked a little of weed, and drank some beers, so i guess that helped with "feeling good", but i really had fun, and was able to forget a little bit about my situation, and THAT just felt amazing! not so good when i came home after, i took my meds and tried going straight to bed (i try sleeping the most i can to keep time going on faster), but started to feel bad soon again, then came in here and started typing this haha, i think i'm really dealing worse with stress after this all, because i can see that when i'm not in a stressfull situation i feel better, but when i'm dealing with anything other symptoms increase, just moving my hand to type this makes my face move by itself and my fingers start to shake. really worried about that one. since playing guitar and doind sports was what brought confidence the most. this is sort of a "castrating" feeling you know? today i was using my phone and somebody at work pointed at me and said to my brother stuff like "is this all that he does? doesn't you mom concerns about him?" i knew that she was just joking, but that made me feel a little paranoid thinking stuff like "does one more person realises that i'm not good?" or "maybe somebody told her something" that's sort of how i feel when somebody looks weird at me or says that i'm not like i used to be. anyway thanks alot again, so good to come in here and have this place to talk about this, this is way better then therapy haha (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 7, 2016 Author Share Posted October 7, 2016 Have you tried those colouring books for adults? Sounds silly but my wife who is going through withdrawal is getting really into them. Something to concentrate on, uses imagination, calming etc Just an idea. Also on the thinking you know what others think, this seems familier to me. My wife does this ALL the time. Picks up on little body language things that are meaningless to everyone except her and thinks the person is meaning something else. Cannot convince her otherwise. In some ways you have an advantage over her as she doesnt see that there is anything wrong with her, doesnt recognise the withdrawal so cannot rationalise with herself and try see the other side of the story. You can, you can consider if what you are thinking is right or wrong. Have you considered downloading an app called headspace on android? Its mindfullness meditation and the first 10 sessions are free. If you dont have android phone they have a website too. I tried it to encourage my wife to try it (she refuses) and its very calming and opens your eyes to all the thoughts that pop into your brain. Its not about controlling or stopping the thoughts, more recoqnising when they are happening. Again, just an idea. It wont "fix" anything but when you are having a down moment it can help pick you up thanks, will check it, sorry to hear about your wife, that is just scary how meds made her quit her job and have so much problems, i was on pretty much the same meds as her, anyway, yeah sometimes i can not carry about what other people are thinking, but that is just when i'm really calm, and usually ANYTHING makes me feel anxious or worried. i usually just get cool when i'm sleeping or in a near sleeping state. what do you think that is making her most paranoid about? people realyzing her suffering, or something else? i can imagine how she feels, this meds weren't supposed to do this, so she might think that it's something to her, plus the usual anxiety the had before going in to meds can makes this worse, try making sure that she knows it's the meds, not her. i heard a lot of people saying good stuff about meditation, i use to suck at this before meds, imagine now haha, but i'll try anyway. thanks bro, wish the best for you and your wife. let me know when she starts to feel better (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus scallywag Posted October 7, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 7, 2016 I hate to be a "buzz kill", NaturalBorn, but I feel it's important to check how often you drink alcohol or smoke weed. Both of these affect your CNS (central nervous system) and therefore can mess up tapering and worsen withdrawal symptoms. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results Cymbalta 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 2016: 20 mg to 7 mg exact doses and dates in this post; 2017: 6.3 mg to 0.0 mg Aug. 12; details here scallywag's IntroductionOnline spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet Link to comment
WingIt Posted October 7, 2016 Share Posted October 7, 2016 thanks, will check it, sorry to hear about your wife, that is just scary how meds made her quit her job and have so much problems, i was on pretty much the same meds as her, anyway, yeah sometimes i can not carry about what other people are thinking, but that is just when i'm really calm, and usually ANYTHING makes me feel anxious or worried. i usually just get cool when i'm sleeping or in a near sleeping state. what do you think that is making her most paranoid about? people realyzing her suffering, or something else? i can imagine how she feels, this meds weren't supposed to do this, so she might think that it's something to her, plus the usual anxiety the had before going in to meds can makes this worse, try making sure that she knows it's the meds, not her. i heard a lot of people saying good stuff about meditation, i use to suck at this before meds, imagine now haha, but i'll try anyway. thanks bro, wish the best for you and your wife. let me know when she starts to feel better I notice with her every little things bring her stress, sometimes just asking her a simple question like if she wants a hot drink or somethint everyday like that. Also like you, when she is sleepy or near sleep she is calmer and almost like her old self. She is most paranoid about what people think of her, she doesnt realise she is suffering. She wont go out in public because she thinks the whole town hates her. Even though rationally out of 20,000 people only 100 would know her, and only 10 would know what she has been doing. She cant see yet that the meds caused all this, she thinks it all happened because we got married, which was also when she had been on the meds about 3 months. Keep up the positive thoughts and look after yourself. Things will come right Supporting my wife through Effexor XR withdrawal -Oct 2015: 112.5mg Effexor XR in morning for anxiety, 25mg Seroquol at night for sleep -March-August 2016: Her life falls apart, paranoia, insomnia, weight loss, quit her job etc -Sept 2nd 2016: Cold Turkey stopped Effexor and Seroquol -Prescribed 2.5mg Olanazapine for sleep and mood stabilisation started taking after 3 weeks withdrawal -Currently past most physical withdrawals, still low energy, still aches, but no brain zaps or dizzyness -Mental state is concerning, hates everyone, tried to annull marriage, wants to move away and start a new life -Oct 2016, beginning to see some improvement, still on 2.5mg Olanzapine, started fish oil and magnesium -Olanzapine stopped after 9 days due to constant hunger, aches, and drowsiness -5-htp added to supps alongside Fish Oil and Magnesium, sleeping 8hours naturally now 5 weeks post efexor and seroquol, 1 week post olanzapine. Still days of "psychosis" like symptoms, irritable, angry, apathetic etc Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 7, 2016 Author Share Posted October 7, 2016 I hate to be a "buzz kill", NaturalBorn, but I feel it's important to check how often you drink alcohol or smoke weed. Both of these affect your CNS (central nervous system) and therefore can mess up tapering and worsen withdrawal symptoms. yes i imagined that, nowadays i just do it during the weekend, but i have done that A LOT, and everytime symptoms would get to scary i would quit drinking and smoking weed. Like i don't know man, i can picture how this can makes it worse, but i can't help doind it once in a while, do you think that it would totally screw things up? I can say that after a coke snort i'm having intense amd crazy vivid dreams again, but that just might be something else (i dont do coke, just tried it like a couple of times in my life, amd dont think i will do it ever again) (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
Cicci Posted October 7, 2016 Share Posted October 7, 2016 Hi NaturalBorn. I'm sorry for your situation. I recently went cold turkey from 175 mg of Venlafaxine (Efexor), after advice from my doctor to switch to Voxra instead, and thought I was going mad!! Didn't know what was up and what was down. Nausea, dizziness, crying, nausea, brain lightnings... Fortunately I went back on 175 mg Venlafaxine just after a couple of days and got rid of almost all the awful withdrawal symptoms in a couple of days. I don't want to scare you, but I have a daughter at your age who has been on Sertraline (SSRI) for 3-4 years when she started smoking weed and drink alkohol about once a week. During that time she got more and more manic and eventually went into a psychosis. So I'm a little concerned about you taking this mix of drugs... Take care! 1988 - 2016 Different sorts antidepressants from Anafranile to Voxra. A couple of attempts to quit, but relapsed (?). 10/7 -16 From 225 mg Venlafaxin to 200 mg - No problems 31/7 -16 From 200 mg Venlafaxin to 175 mg - Minor panic attacks now and then 1/10 -16 Switched straight off from 175 mg Venlafaxin to 150 g Voxra on doctor's ordination (due to difficulties to cope with working as little as 25%) -Bad withdrawal symptoms; dizzieness, nausea, insomnia, nighmares, heart pounding, panic attacks, malaise 4/10 -16 Continued with 150 mg Voxra and added 150 mg of Venlafaxine 5/10 -16 Removed Voxra on advice from SA, went back to 175 mg of Venlafaxine and will continue slowly tapering it out. Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 7, 2016 Author Share Posted October 7, 2016 Hi NaturalBorn. I'm sorry for your situation. I recently went cold turkey from 175 mg of Venlafaxine (Efexor), after advice from my doctor to switch to Voxra instead, and thought I was going mad!! Didn't know what was up and what was down. Nausea, dizziness, crying, nausea, brain lightnings... Fortunately I went back on 175 mg Venlafaxine just after a couple of days and got rid of almost all the awful withdrawal symptoms in a couple of days. I don't want to scare you, but I have a daughter at your age who has been on Sertraline (SSRI) for 3-4 years when she started smoking weed and drink alkohol about once a week. During that time she got more and more manic and eventually went into a psychosis. So I'm a little concerned about you taking this mix of drugs... Take care! sorry to hear about that, yes i'm trying my best to avoid any kind of drugs, today i'm going out again but gonna stay just on the beers, amd probably just a few, honestly i feel like i don't wanna let this problem screw one more thing in my life, but anyway thanls for your rwply, and about your daugjter did she jist started drinking amd smoking after going on sertraline? I noticed that while i was on my first time taking effexor i had more cravings to weed and alcohol. I try paying attention to how i react to things and honestly alcohol amd weed doesn't seem to bring much problems. But i take care of myself now, like there is no way thay i'm going back to do this everyday... do you also have vivid dreams at any ppint? This is getting scary to me (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
Cicci Posted October 7, 2016 Share Posted October 7, 2016 My daughter has been suffering from bad anxiety since she was very young and it got worse in her late teens. She was prescribed Sertralin,but after taking that for 2 years without getting any effect on her anxiety she started partying more on the weekends - drinking and eventually trying weed - to forget her worries for a while. I didn't even know about this until she one day, after several months of hypomania, started acting really weard and got psychotic. She only smoked 1-2 joints a week, and had some drinks once or twice a week, but I guess in combination with the medication and the fact that she might be a person who is extra vulnerable to drugs it was enough to cause that terrible experience. She might be bipolar, like her father and grandmother - and from what I've read you should not be taking Sertralin if you're bipolar, since it's even more likely to trigger hypomania and cause psychosis in that case, that if you're not bipolar. About vivid dreams - I was only off Venlafaxine for a couple of days before I went back on it again, but during that time I had a lot of vivid dreams and nightmares. As soon as I started to fall asleep they popped up and woke me up, terrified and sweating. I would think that what you are experiencing is withdrawal symptoms from quitting so abrupt with Efexor. If I were you I would very carefully and slowly tapering the medications you're on right now. Don't taper further until you feel that most or all of the withdrawal symptoms from your last tapering is gone. And stay out of all the other drugs... They only worsen your problems. Take care 1988 - 2016 Different sorts antidepressants from Anafranile to Voxra. A couple of attempts to quit, but relapsed (?). 10/7 -16 From 225 mg Venlafaxin to 200 mg - No problems 31/7 -16 From 200 mg Venlafaxin to 175 mg - Minor panic attacks now and then 1/10 -16 Switched straight off from 175 mg Venlafaxin to 150 g Voxra on doctor's ordination (due to difficulties to cope with working as little as 25%) -Bad withdrawal symptoms; dizzieness, nausea, insomnia, nighmares, heart pounding, panic attacks, malaise 4/10 -16 Continued with 150 mg Voxra and added 150 mg of Venlafaxine 5/10 -16 Removed Voxra on advice from SA, went back to 175 mg of Venlafaxine and will continue slowly tapering it out. Link to comment
peng Posted October 7, 2016 Share Posted October 7, 2016 (edited) "......honestly alcohol and weed doesn't seem to bring much problems." young man you need to stop deluding yourself.....Everyone with a grain of common sense will tell you this is totally ignorant. Don't say I know nothing - I am a grandfather of 71 years, retired scientist, in Scotland, a nation where over hundreds of years, countless men - including family members and acquaintances - have ruined the lives of themselves and their loved ones by preaching a similar mantra to themselves. You need to show some manly strength - and brains - to tackle this beast - right now! Apologies for kicking your backside - Sincere best wishes, Edited October 8, 2016 by ChessieCat Edit out inappropriate expressions Born 1945. 1999 - First Effexor/Venlafaxine. 2016 Withdrawal research. Effexor. 13Jul - 212.5mg; 6Aug - 200.0mg; 24Aug - 187.5mg; 13Sep - 175.0mg; 3Oct - 162.5mg; 26Oct - 150mg 2017 9Jan - 150.00mg; 23Mar - 137.50mg; 24Apr - 125.00mg; 31May - 112.50mg holding; 3Sep - 100.00mg; 20Sep - 93.75mg; 20Oct - 87.5mg; 12Nov - 81.25mg; 13 Dec - 75.00mg 2018 18Jan - 69.1mg; 16Feb - 62.5mg; 16March - 57.5mg (-8%); 22Apr - 56.3mg(-2%); CRASHED - Updose 29May - 62.5mg; Updose - 1Jul - 75.0mg. Updose - 2Aug - 87.5mg. Updose - 27Aug - 100.0mg. Updose - 11Oct 112.5mg. Updose - 6Nov 125.00mg. 2019 Updoses 19 Jan - 150.0mg. 1April - 162.5mg. 24 April - Feeling better - doing tasks, getting outside. 7 May - usual depression questionnaire gives "probably no depression" result. Supps/Vits Omega 3; Chelated Magnesium; Prebiotics/Probiotics, Vit D3. Link to comment
fuerza Posted October 8, 2016 Share Posted October 8, 2016 "......honestly alcohol and weed doesn't seem to bring much problems." young man you need to stop deluding yourself.....Everyone with a grain of common sense will tell you this is totally ignorant. Don't say I know nothing - I am a grandfather of 71 years, retired scientist, in Scotland, a nation where over hundreds of years, countless men - including family members and acquaintances - have ruined the lives of themselves and their loved ones by preaching a similar mantra to themselves. You need to show some manly strength - and brains - to tackle this beast - right now! Apologies for kicking your backside - Sincere best wishes, I cannot agree more! Some people don't react to drugs at all, but you're in withdrawal. Don't put your poor mind though this. I've also had a drink or two during my withdrawal and experienced severe setbacks every time. I'm not talking about heavy drinking, but like 1-2 beers or a glass of wine. Weed is totally out of question for me, because even before taking the AD-s I've had some bad (and some very good) experiences with smoking it. The bad experiences were quite unpredictable, sometimes due to the amount I smoked and other times coming from very small amounts. I have lots of friends that take drugs recreationally. About 4 years ago there was like this drug boom in my country. A good friend visited me yesterday and we talked about our mutual friends. Lots of them have been having problems, although they function well in their everyday life. One guy recently started smoking weed again (it triggered a psychosis in his youth) and has went into mania-like stage and will probably go into a psychosis soon. Another passed out from too much MDMA and said that he doesn't know what to do if he decides to quit. Lots of my other friends are becoming more and more dependent on drugs which are considered fun and safe party drugs. I'm not against drugs per se, but drugs are for people who are very stable mentally, know when to stop and don't use them for merely getting a kick. And even when all the previous is true, you never really know when a drug messes with your head. If you add drugs and alcohol to your withdrawal, you can't separate the symptoms anymore. Also, you nervous system is probably 100x more sensitive than the average person's. I know what you mean by saying that you don't want to quit all that's good in life. I was quite a heavy social drinker before going on AD-s and I also occasionally took MDMA. Quitting everything made me so angry in the past, but right now I just think there's no use in fighting it. I have two choices. I either have a drink and feel better for one night and worse for weeks afterwards or I don't have a drink and at least know that I've done everything to keep myself from feeling really crappy. I don't mean to lecture you, but rather offer an insight into drug problems. All my friends started smoking weed in their teens and using party drugs in their 20s. They started off doing a hit of MDMA every once in a while and now most of them use drugs several times a week in large doses. All of them come from well-off middle-class families and seem to have their life together, but many have confessed that they don't really know how to have fun without enhancing with drugs or alcohol. Maybe this is the same invincibility complex that lots of young people have. I had the same thing before I started taking AD-s. I worked like a madman, partied like an animal on weekends, worked out very often and occasionally took drugs. However, this all ended in serious crash and I had to take AD-s afterwards. NaturalBorn, I do hope you feel better, even if it's a tiny bit. Again, what has your brother said about your withdrawal? Also, don't worry about what other people think. Some of them are ignorant, some of them are actually dealing with their own serious issues and don't want to see reflections of themselves, some of them try to support, but don't know how to help you. You never know what people think or why they do something. Sometimes even they don't know consciously. History: Escitalopram 10mg Nov - Jan 2016 (switched to Effexor XR) Effexor XR 37,5mg Jan - Feb 2016; 75mg Feb - April 2016; 37,5mg for one week in April, 75mg April-July 2016 (started tapering, took my last beads on Sept 11.) The fluctuations happened because my GP mistakingly prescribed me the wrong dosage. Oxazepam 2x10mg Dec 2015 - Jan 2016 (basically CT but no apparent symptoms); June 2016 - Feb 2017 (c/o to Valium) Current: Valdoxan 25mg Dec 2015 - Sept 2016. 12.4mg (Sept - Nov '16) -> 11.86mg (Nov '16) -> 10.75mg (Dec '16) -> 9.75mg (Jan '17) -> 8mg (March '17) -> 7mg (April '17) -> 4.5mg (May '17) -> 4mg (Jan '18) -> updosed to 4.5mg in the end of January Valium (liquid form) 8.5mg Feb 2017. 7.6mg (June '17) -> 7.2mg (June '17) -> 6.8mg (July '17) -> 6.4 (Sept '17) -> 6.2 (March '18) -> 6 (April 7 '18) -> 5.8 (April 17 '18) -> 5.6 (April 26 '18) -> 5.4 (July 16 '18) -> 5.2 (March '20) -> 5 (March '20)What to take away from all this: if you feel extremely sick only after a few doses of an AD, please tell your doctor and just stop. Adding medications is no bueno. Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 8, 2016 Author Share Posted October 8, 2016 "......honestly alcohol and weed doesn't seem to bring much problems." young man you need to stop deluding yourself.....Everyone with a grain of common sense will tell you this is totally ignorant. Don't say I know nothing - I am a grandfather of 71 years, retired scientist, in Scotland, a nation where over hundreds of years, countless men - including family members and acquaintances - have ruined the lives of themselves and their loved ones by preaching a similar mantra to themselves. You need to show some manly strength - and brains - to tackle this beast - right now! Apologies for kicking your backside - Sincere best wishes, thanks my friend, no worries, i'm gonna stay away from any kind of drugs for a long time, i'm hoping to taper my seroquel and stick to trazadone, if i'm having problem sleeping or something, i'm gonna request some ambien, this makes me sleep great, bteer then benzos, i also got to take them REALLY carefully so that i don't have to withdrawal from another substance, thinking about it the weed may have contributted to the hypomania stage, i don't recaal seeing nobody having hypomania on withdrawal... thanks to god i didn't went on psychosis. wishing the best for you as well. (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
Moderator brassmonkey Posted October 8, 2016 Moderator Share Posted October 8, 2016 " i'm gonna request some ambien, this makes me sleep great, bteer then benzos," Technically ambien isn't a benzo, but it works the exact same way on the exact same receptors and it just as hard to get off of. We have many people here going through ambien WD. 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 8, 2016 Author Share Posted October 8, 2016 "......honestly alcohol and weed doesn't seem to bring much problems." young man you need to stop deluding yourself.....Everyone with a grain of common sense will tell you this is totally ignorant. Don't say I know nothing - I am a grandfather of 71 years, retired scientist, in Scotland, a nation where over hundreds of years, countless men - including family members and acquaintances - have ruined the lives of themselves and their loved ones by preaching a similar mantra to themselves. You need to show some manly strength - and brains - to tackle this beast - right now! Apologies for kicking your backside - Sincere best wishes, I cannot agree more! Some people don't react to drugs at all, but you're in withdrawal. Don't put your poor mind though this. I've also had a drink or two during my withdrawal and experienced severe setbacks every time. I'm not talking about heavy drinking, but like 1-2 beers or a glass of wine. Weed is totally out of question for me, because even before taking the AD-s I've had some bad (and some very good) experiences with smoking it. The bad experiences were quite unpredictable, sometimes due to the amount I smoked and other times coming from very small amounts. I have lots of friends that take drugs recreationally. About 4 years ago there was like this drug boom in my country. A good friend visited me yesterday and we talked about our mutual friends. Lots of them have been having problems, although they function well in their everyday life. One guy recently started smoking weed again (it triggered a psychosis in his youth) and has went into mania-like stage and will probably go into a psychosis soon. Another passed out from too much MDMA and said that he doesn't know what to do if he decides to quit. Lots of my other friends are becoming more and more dependent on drugs which are considered fun and safe party drugs. I'm not against drugs per se, but drugs are for people who are very stable mentally, know when to stop and don't use them for merely getting a kick. And even when all the previous is true, you never really know when a drug messes with your head. If you add drugs and alcohol to your withdrawal, you can't separate the symptoms anymore. Also, you nervous system is probably 100x more sensitive than the average person's. I know what you mean by saying that you don't want to quit all that's good in life. I was quite a heavy social drinker before going on AD-s and I also occasionally took MDMA. Quitting everything made me so angry in the past, but right now I just think there's no use in fighting it. I have two choices. I either have a drink and feel better for one night and worse for weeks afterwards or I don't have a drink and at least know that I've done everything to keep myself from feeling really crappy. I don't mean to lecture you, but rather offer an insight into drug problems. All my friends started smoking weed in their teens and using party drugs in their 20s. They started off doing a hit of MDMA every once in a while and now most of them use drugs several times a week in large doses. All of them come from well-off middle-class families and seem to have their life together, but many have confessed that they don't really know how to have fun without enhancing with drugs or alcohol. Maybe this is the same invincibility complex that lots of young people have. I had the same thing before I started taking AD-s. I worked like a madman, partied like an animal on weekends, worked out very often and occasionally took drugs. However, this all ended in serious crash and I had to take AD-s afterwards. NaturalBorn, I do hope you feel better, even if it's a tiny bit. Again, what has your brother said about your withdrawal? Also, don't worry about what other people think. Some of them are ignorant, some of them are actually dealing with their own serious issues and don't want to see reflections of themselves, some of them try to support, but don't know how to help you. You never know what people think or why they do something. Sometimes even they don't know consciously. yes that's right. i REALLY can't see myself having a social life without drinking and smoking around people, but you know, i'm convinced that's for the best right now, i'm gonna stay away from any kind of recreational drugs for a long time now.... yes about my brother, i tried talking to him about it, and he actually understands, but we are definetly not supportive to each other. i mean we just don't talk that much, when i do some stupid thing he also mentions that i'm not "normal" and stuff like that. i just can't spect much from him, but that's fine really.... i'm really looking foward to the day where i wake up and don't try to hold into my last whisper of sleep, or just stay in bed for hours, i can't lie, it has been really hard and scary. doing things like a haircut and stuff like that it's just really freaking hard, yesterday i went out with some friends again and started to feel like CRAP, no words, i felt like i was dying, i had to excuse myself and go to the bathroom just to breathe, this seems undending. my friends wanted to go to a party after the bar that we were, and i was just making up any kind of excuses not to go... then they started saying again "man you are not like you used to be", and that just breaks my heart, it's just really hard to accept that something like that happened to you, i question myself "why???" "why me??" this sucks the hope out of me, damm i'm 20, this is supposed to be the best time of my life, and it's being by far the worst, i feel like i'm not even human sometimes, i look at people and everybody is just chilled, laughing, thinking about their lives. and i'm just stucked into misery and thinking about medication all the time. this is beyond pathetic. anxiety almost killed me yesterday, holy jesus, this is a nightmare, everyday, don1t have actual words to describe it, i think a lot to myself "is there any way that i could have screwed thing up more?" i don't think there is.... i know it not my fault, all i did was listen to a doctor and take drugs that were supposed to be safe. how could this happen? such a tragedy... i almost can't identify with other people anymore, you know? who had such a problem? and i have a tendency to think that my case is worse then anybody's, i went cold turkey from the highest dosage of one of the most hard to kick antidepressants, mixed it with drugs, then went back into it, then went to another more medications, all this at the age of 18-20, sometimes i really don't think i'm gonna be able to get over this, i thankfull to be in some sort of anedonia, i mean i do feel some emotions, but i simply can't cry no matter what, and i was a dude who used to cry a lot when i was alone for no reason at all. and being in this position is sure a great reason to cry. right now what i'm concerned about is how am i'm gonna taper this seroquel and trazodone if i'm feeling this bad? man i'm so fucked anyway, thanks a lot for spending some time giving support to a total stranger, i'm eternally greatfull for that. wish you the best as well, i really wish that everybody who has been throught this ends up getting "stronger" from all this misery you know (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 8, 2016 Author Share Posted October 8, 2016 " i'm gonna request some ambien, this makes me sleep great, bteer then benzos," Technically ambien isn't a benzo, but it works the exact same way on the exact same receptors and it just as hard to get off of. We have many people here going through ambien WD. yes i'm aware that they are also pretty addictive, i'm just gonna take them because they help me more than benzos, for some reason... and i'm not gonna even be taking them for anxiety or anything like that. just for sleep, because i know that when i'm off drugs i sometimes go without sleep for 3 days, and that can't be good for your brain and body, plus i got to at least go to work and that requires me driving, and being without sleep for days there is no way i could get thing done (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
Cicci Posted October 8, 2016 Share Posted October 8, 2016 Hang in there NaturalBorn! My daughter is 21 - and I so recognize what you're describing in her. She went CT of Sertralin when she had her psychosis and were put on antipsychotics instead. Now, 3 months later, she is out of her psychosis, but experiencing some of the things you describe, with some kind of numbness, depression, anxiety and panic attacks. She doesn't like crowds or noisy places right now and is feeling sad that she can't go out to have a drink with friends like before right now. She is also sad that most of her friends don't seem to understand or avoid her. I think people who never experienced mental "illness" can behave quite unsympathetic or avoid talking about it, because it makes them feel uncomfortable for some reason. I try to say to my daughter that the real friends will stay and support - and the others are not really your friends... I know it's not very easy in your age, but I think it is best to be open about your problems. Like I said - the real friends will support and at least try to understand. And people feeling mentally ill are only humans too. And there are a lot of us out there. We need to be more open about it to remove the label "weird" about mentally ill people. 1988 - 2016 Different sorts antidepressants from Anafranile to Voxra. A couple of attempts to quit, but relapsed (?). 10/7 -16 From 225 mg Venlafaxin to 200 mg - No problems 31/7 -16 From 200 mg Venlafaxin to 175 mg - Minor panic attacks now and then 1/10 -16 Switched straight off from 175 mg Venlafaxin to 150 g Voxra on doctor's ordination (due to difficulties to cope with working as little as 25%) -Bad withdrawal symptoms; dizzieness, nausea, insomnia, nighmares, heart pounding, panic attacks, malaise 4/10 -16 Continued with 150 mg Voxra and added 150 mg of Venlafaxine 5/10 -16 Removed Voxra on advice from SA, went back to 175 mg of Venlafaxine and will continue slowly tapering it out. Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 8, 2016 Author Share Posted October 8, 2016 Hang in there NaturalBorn! My daughter is 21 - and I so recognize what you're describing in her. She went CT of Sertralin when she had her psychosis and were put on antipsychotics instead. Now, 3 months later, she is out of her psychosis, but experiencing some of the things you describe, with some kind of numbness, depression, anxiety and panic attacks. She doesn't like crowds or noisy places right now and is feeling sad that she can't go out to have a drink with friends like before right now. She is also sad that most of her friends don't seem to understand or avoid her. I think people who never experienced mental "illness" can behave quite unsympathetic or avoid talking about it, because it makes them feel uncomfortable for some reason. I try to say to my daughter that the real friends will stay and support - and the others are not really your friends... I know it's not very easy in your age, but I think it is best to be open about your problems. Like I said - the real friends will support and at least try to understand. And people feeling mentally ill are only humans too. And there are a lot of us out there. We need to be more open about it to remove the label "weird" about mentally ill people. yes tottally, so sorry to hear that people are avoiding her, you are right, those are not real friends, i use to have a lot stressfull frienships that were based on competition and making jokes about each other you know? just acting stupid and hatefull and laughing about it, nowadays i just can't take it anymore, but whatever. i can totally indentify with you daughter's suffering. but she is really lucky to have you... why don't you invite her to join us in here? i think it would be good. sorry i don't have much to say i'm having a really bad time in here, trying to read about stories and introductions, just really seeking some hope... thanks for your post, this site is the only thing that has kept me able to go on without losing my mind. please let me know when things get better for you and your daughter. thanks a lot for the post, just reading that first sentene "hang in the nb" made me feel a little better haha, everyday is just about surviving now... i'm trying to see how my body reacts to sugar and coffe, i read those can trigger a lot of symptoms, and i think i should pay more attention to my diet, since i was feeling better on rehab because we didn't had much sugar or coffe. wish the best for you... we are gonna get out of this stronger (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
fuerza Posted October 8, 2016 Share Posted October 8, 2016 i'm trying to see how my body reacts to sugar and coffe, i read those can trigger a lot of symptoms, and i think i should pay more attention to my diet, since i was feeling better on rehab because we didn't had much sugar or coffe. wish the best for you... we are gonna get out of this stronger I also agree with this. Avoiding sugar, coffee and other stimulants makes me feel better. I've talked to my friends about their anxiety and they also agree that coffee often makes it worse. Also, food choices help to ease the symptoms. Try to eat fresh. You have lots of fresh yummy things in Brazil all year long, take advantage of that. Again, I really hope things are getting better for you. My suggestions are not meant as nagging. They are tips which I wish I would've followed earlier. You'll pull through this and will have a long happy life. Sometimes it's easy to forget that these things are harder to deal with when you're younger. People's expectations matter so much more and the social pressure is immense. Even without all the withdrawal problems, the troubles and pains of growing up are quite a big load to handle. But I assure you, this will pass. Young people are a lot more ignorant of other people's suffering because they lack life experience. You are not weak or lazy. Handling all this takes so much strength and you're putting one foot in front of the other every single day. Please remember this. Believe me, I have felt the same as I've struggled with social anxiety all my life. The older you get, the less other people's opinions actually matter. I used to be a really shy up until when I was 20. I relentlessly worried about what other people think about me and always assumed the worst. In my 20s I slowly became more outgoing and my fears started disappearing. It's actually a kind of a blessing because I can now help other people feel better with about struggles. Suffering plants the seed for empathy. History: Escitalopram 10mg Nov - Jan 2016 (switched to Effexor XR) Effexor XR 37,5mg Jan - Feb 2016; 75mg Feb - April 2016; 37,5mg for one week in April, 75mg April-July 2016 (started tapering, took my last beads on Sept 11.) The fluctuations happened because my GP mistakingly prescribed me the wrong dosage. Oxazepam 2x10mg Dec 2015 - Jan 2016 (basically CT but no apparent symptoms); June 2016 - Feb 2017 (c/o to Valium) Current: Valdoxan 25mg Dec 2015 - Sept 2016. 12.4mg (Sept - Nov '16) -> 11.86mg (Nov '16) -> 10.75mg (Dec '16) -> 9.75mg (Jan '17) -> 8mg (March '17) -> 7mg (April '17) -> 4.5mg (May '17) -> 4mg (Jan '18) -> updosed to 4.5mg in the end of January Valium (liquid form) 8.5mg Feb 2017. 7.6mg (June '17) -> 7.2mg (June '17) -> 6.8mg (July '17) -> 6.4 (Sept '17) -> 6.2 (March '18) -> 6 (April 7 '18) -> 5.8 (April 17 '18) -> 5.6 (April 26 '18) -> 5.4 (July 16 '18) -> 5.2 (March '20) -> 5 (March '20)What to take away from all this: if you feel extremely sick only after a few doses of an AD, please tell your doctor and just stop. Adding medications is no bueno. Link to comment
Cicci Posted October 8, 2016 Share Posted October 8, 2016 NB - I will invite my daughter here eventually. I've just started to learn about the effects of long term use of AD and the awful WD problems myself. Since she use to worry a lot about everything I don't want to scare her too much about the medicines she is taking. I've found some great free hypnotherapy sessions on youtube by Thomas Hall that she's been trying out - and she seems to get some help from them. (Check them out and try them you too!) Whenn she's starting to feel better I will introduce this place to her. Try the hypnosis sessions and do things that are good for you and that you enjoy! I've also had a lot of help myself from breathing exercises. I think you can find such exercises too on youtube. Take care! <3 //Cicci 1988 - 2016 Different sorts antidepressants from Anafranile to Voxra. A couple of attempts to quit, but relapsed (?). 10/7 -16 From 225 mg Venlafaxin to 200 mg - No problems 31/7 -16 From 200 mg Venlafaxin to 175 mg - Minor panic attacks now and then 1/10 -16 Switched straight off from 175 mg Venlafaxin to 150 g Voxra on doctor's ordination (due to difficulties to cope with working as little as 25%) -Bad withdrawal symptoms; dizzieness, nausea, insomnia, nighmares, heart pounding, panic attacks, malaise 4/10 -16 Continued with 150 mg Voxra and added 150 mg of Venlafaxine 5/10 -16 Removed Voxra on advice from SA, went back to 175 mg of Venlafaxine and will continue slowly tapering it out. Link to comment
peng Posted October 8, 2016 Share Posted October 8, 2016 Yes, as fuerza says, we do not mean to sound nagging. We are distressed about young people struggling with these demons. Never used to be like this when I was your age. With older age comes the feeling "seen the hazards this young guy is going to get tangled up in - pity he does not know better yet." Just trying to give you a jolt in the right direction and hoping things improve for you! PS - Your English is impressive, by the way. Born 1945. 1999 - First Effexor/Venlafaxine. 2016 Withdrawal research. Effexor. 13Jul - 212.5mg; 6Aug - 200.0mg; 24Aug - 187.5mg; 13Sep - 175.0mg; 3Oct - 162.5mg; 26Oct - 150mg 2017 9Jan - 150.00mg; 23Mar - 137.50mg; 24Apr - 125.00mg; 31May - 112.50mg holding; 3Sep - 100.00mg; 20Sep - 93.75mg; 20Oct - 87.5mg; 12Nov - 81.25mg; 13 Dec - 75.00mg 2018 18Jan - 69.1mg; 16Feb - 62.5mg; 16March - 57.5mg (-8%); 22Apr - 56.3mg(-2%); CRASHED - Updose 29May - 62.5mg; Updose - 1Jul - 75.0mg. Updose - 2Aug - 87.5mg. Updose - 27Aug - 100.0mg. Updose - 11Oct 112.5mg. Updose - 6Nov 125.00mg. 2019 Updoses 19 Jan - 150.0mg. 1April - 162.5mg. 24 April - Feeling better - doing tasks, getting outside. 7 May - usual depression questionnaire gives "probably no depression" result. Supps/Vits Omega 3; Chelated Magnesium; Prebiotics/Probiotics, Vit D3. Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 9, 2016 Author Share Posted October 9, 2016 i'm trying to see how my body reacts to sugar and coffe, i read those can trigger a lot of symptoms, and i think i should pay more attention to my diet, since i was feeling better on rehab because we didn't had much sugar or coffe. wish the best for you... we are gonna get out of this stronger I also agree with this. Avoiding sugar, coffee and other stimulants makes me feel better. I've talked to my friends about their anxiety and they also agree that coffee often makes it worse. Also, food choices help to ease the symptoms. Try to eat fresh. You have lots of fresh yummy things in Brazil all year long, take advantage of that. Again, I really hope things are getting better for you. My suggestions are not meant as nagging. They are tips which I wish I would've followed earlier. You'll pull through this and will have a long happy life. Sometimes it's easy to forget that these things are harder to deal with when you're younger. People's expectations matter so much more and the social pressure is immense. Even without all the withdrawal problems, the troubles and pains of growing up are quite a big load to handle. But I assure you, this will pass. Young people are a lot more ignorant of other people's suffering because they lack life experience. You are not weak or lazy. Handling all this takes so much strength and you're putting one foot in front of the other every single day. Please remember this. Believe me, I have felt the same as I've struggled with social anxiety all my life. The older you get, the less other people's opinions actually matter. I used to be a really shy up until when I was 20. I relentlessly worried about what other people think about me and always assumed the worst. In my 20s I slowly became more outgoing and my fears started disappearing. It's actually a kind of a blessing because I can now help other people feel better with about struggles. Suffering plants the seed for empathy. yes i should really pay more attention to diet also because a lot of things that i eat cause my stomach to get sick, it's amazing how much of your body is affected by this drugs... yeah i really, have some hard time thinking about other people, specially after the hypomania stage, omg i hope that never happends again.... i could never take any suggestion of yours as "nagging" (never knew this word before haha), i'm really thankfull for having you guys and this kind of support. honestly i don't know what i would have done if it wasn't by the internet, i would probably be hooked on a drug cocktail or something, yesterday was an awfull day, was just so worried that didn't left my bed all day... thanks a lot fuerza, and by the way how are you doing now? dealing with some kind of symptom still, or fully healed? (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 9, 2016 Author Share Posted October 9, 2016 NB - I will invite my daughter here eventually. I've just started to learn about the effects of long term use of AD and the awful WD problems myself. Since she use to worry a lot about everything I don't want to scare her too much about the medicines she is taking. I've found some great free hypnotherapy sessions on youtube by Thomas Hall that she's been trying out - and she seems to get some help from them. (Check them out and try them you too!) Whenn she's starting to feel better I will introduce this place to her. Try the hypnosis sessions and do things that are good for you and that you enjoy! I've also had a lot of help myself from breathing exercises. I think you can find such exercises too on youtube. Take care! <3 //Cicci yes that makes sence, gonna chek that on youtube right away, i'm trying to distract myself on the internet today, just reminding that tomorrow i have to go to work makes me feel useles. i tried breathing exercises once, but didn't noticed any improvement, i don't know why. i guess this week i'm thinking about starting physical therapy again... that seems to help with the awfull paresthesia that i feel 24/7... really concerned about it being nerve damage or something sometimes my right hand just doesn't feel like my own, this is just to scary... it's been a year now and it's hard to believe that i had almost no improvement... or none at all. this is just to scary at some points anyway thanks for your reply, it means a lot, hope we all be able to post sucess stories at some point wish the best for you and your daughter, hugs (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 9, 2016 Author Share Posted October 9, 2016 Yes, as fuerza says, we do not mean to sound nagging. We are distressed about young people struggling with these demons. Never used to be like this when I was your age. With older age comes the feeling "seen the hazards this young guy is going to get tangled up in - pity he does not know better yet." Just trying to give you a jolt in the right direction and hoping things improve for you! PS - Your English is impressive, by the way. haha thanks man, yeah i get it, aprecciate the help a lot man, no words. man sometimes it's just hard, you wake up feeling awfull symptoms still, and you have no idea what to do, what to think, this forum helps me putting some of my thoughts in words.... i really wish that at some point i see some improvement, in any department. and i can't shake the idea that i have 2 more meds to taper and i'm feeling awful already... i just feel stucked in time. sometimes the fear gets the best of me. but as you said it's time to show some brains to face this problem. i'm gonna start taking things really easy this time, i'm even considering not travelling this year as i usually do. one of my worst waves was when i was at the beach. anyway really wish the best for you too, i hope someday this all becomes just a memory in our heads, and we can go back to what i used to be... it's hard seeing any positivity out of this situation. we are gonna be able to play music again in the future, i'm sure haha. (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
Cicci Posted October 9, 2016 Share Posted October 9, 2016 thinking about starting physical therapy again... that seems to help with the awfull paresthesia that i feel 24/7... really concerned about it being nerve damage or something sometimes my right hand just doesn't feel like my own, this is just to scary... it's been a year now and it's hard to believe that i had almost no improvement... or none at all. this is just to scary at some points Physical therapy sounds like a good idea. I think that helps a lot for all of the WD symptoms and generally for all emotional problems. About the paresthesia - I'm quite sure this is also a WD effect, but if it worries you, check it up with an MD instead of worrying about it being a nerve damage. You have been exposed to several drugs lately - changed, tapered and quit - I don't think it's strange that your body and mind reacts like this. How was that period of hypomania you had? When was that and what did you do that was manic? When my daughter got psychotic she was obsessed with painting cigarette butts with nail polish... It was somewhat scarry then - but now we try to laugh about it. To my whole family that has always been a way of dealing with our mental problems - to be able to joke and laugh about it afterwards. 1988 - 2016 Different sorts antidepressants from Anafranile to Voxra. A couple of attempts to quit, but relapsed (?). 10/7 -16 From 225 mg Venlafaxin to 200 mg - No problems 31/7 -16 From 200 mg Venlafaxin to 175 mg - Minor panic attacks now and then 1/10 -16 Switched straight off from 175 mg Venlafaxin to 150 g Voxra on doctor's ordination (due to difficulties to cope with working as little as 25%) -Bad withdrawal symptoms; dizzieness, nausea, insomnia, nighmares, heart pounding, panic attacks, malaise 4/10 -16 Continued with 150 mg Voxra and added 150 mg of Venlafaxine 5/10 -16 Removed Voxra on advice from SA, went back to 175 mg of Venlafaxine and will continue slowly tapering it out. Link to comment
fuerza Posted October 9, 2016 Share Posted October 9, 2016 yes i should really pay more attention to diet also because a lot of things that i eat cause my stomach to get sick, it's amazing how much of your body is affected by this drugs... yeah i really, have some hard time thinking about other people, specially after the hypomania stage, omg i hope that never happends again.... i could never take any suggestion of yours as "nagging" (never knew this word before haha), i'm really thankfull for having you guys and this kind of support. honestly i don't know what i would have done if it wasn't by the internet, i would probably be hooked on a drug cocktail or something, yesterday was an awfull day, was just so worried that didn't left my bed all day... thanks a lot fuerza, and by the way how are you doing now? dealing with some kind of symptom still, or fully healed? Some days are like that and that's okay. I'm doing so-so. Still experiencing pretty severe withdrawal. I try to encourage others because it also helps me. I keep and eye on your thread because I can relate to what you're saying about the feelings of losing hope and missing your youth. Going from a very social and fun lifestyle to this can seem insufferable. My silver lining is that maybe this was what I needed not go overboard with all the partying. Plenty of my friends already suffer from doing drugs too often or drinking too much. Maybe this was the wake'up call I needed. I don't have the strength to think positive thoughts every day. I actually rarely do. But when those days occur, I make sure to say to myself that I will pull myself through this. On the better days I also like to listen to music or read poetry. It's amazing to listen to a song which had no deeper meaning before all this happened to me and to realise that the author might be feeling something similar to me. I am not alone in this. It can be very cathartic to listen to your feelings put into music. Almost like listening to a love song after falling in love for the first time, but a lot darker. Also, the physical therapy idea is great! People go through serious accidents and fully heal. I'm sure you will too. Tudo de bom and keep us updated on your recovery! History: Escitalopram 10mg Nov - Jan 2016 (switched to Effexor XR) Effexor XR 37,5mg Jan - Feb 2016; 75mg Feb - April 2016; 37,5mg for one week in April, 75mg April-July 2016 (started tapering, took my last beads on Sept 11.) The fluctuations happened because my GP mistakingly prescribed me the wrong dosage. Oxazepam 2x10mg Dec 2015 - Jan 2016 (basically CT but no apparent symptoms); June 2016 - Feb 2017 (c/o to Valium) Current: Valdoxan 25mg Dec 2015 - Sept 2016. 12.4mg (Sept - Nov '16) -> 11.86mg (Nov '16) -> 10.75mg (Dec '16) -> 9.75mg (Jan '17) -> 8mg (March '17) -> 7mg (April '17) -> 4.5mg (May '17) -> 4mg (Jan '18) -> updosed to 4.5mg in the end of January Valium (liquid form) 8.5mg Feb 2017. 7.6mg (June '17) -> 7.2mg (June '17) -> 6.8mg (July '17) -> 6.4 (Sept '17) -> 6.2 (March '18) -> 6 (April 7 '18) -> 5.8 (April 17 '18) -> 5.6 (April 26 '18) -> 5.4 (July 16 '18) -> 5.2 (March '20) -> 5 (March '20)What to take away from all this: if you feel extremely sick only after a few doses of an AD, please tell your doctor and just stop. Adding medications is no bueno. Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 9, 2016 Author Share Posted October 9, 2016 thinking about starting physical therapy again... that seems to help with the awfull paresthesia that i feel 24/7... really concerned about it being nerve damage or something sometimes my right hand just doesn't feel like my own, this is just to scary... it's been a year now and it's hard to believe that i had almost no improvement... or none at all. this is just to scary at some points Physical therapy sounds like a good idea. I think that helps a lot for all of the WD symptoms and generally for all emotional problems. About the paresthesia - I'm quite sure this is also a WD effect, but if it worries you, check it up with an MD instead of worrying about it being a nerve damage. You have been exposed to several drugs lately - changed, tapered and quit - I don't think it's strange that your body and mind reacts like this. How was that period of hypomania you had? When was that and what did you do that was manic? When my daughter got psychotic she was obsessed with painting cigarette butts with nail polish... It was somewhat scarry then - but now we try to laugh about it. To my whole family that has always been a way of dealing with our mental problems - to be able to joke and laugh about it afterwards. i did an ultrasound and it came back ok, as i thought it would, the hypomania started during the first month of effexor withdrawal, i didn't knew nothing about ad withdrawal so i didn't think i would be a problem, i was just really angry and acting psycho to everyone, and kind of liking it, posting the most kind of rage/anger stuff related on my social medias (that was really embarissing), and telling everyone around me that i was god-like and a psychopath... (i know) then i started a new job on a factory because i was tired of studying, and there i started feeling like some sort of maniac i can't really describe it, i thought that i knew things that nobody else could know, was drinking and driving all day and trying to hurt people emotionally, it was really pathetic and embarassing. i ended up going to a psychiatrist and telling him how he should treat me haha, just trying to sound impressive and bizarre in a weird way. i would be walking in circles ALL DAY LONG, and feeling like if i could kill a bull with my own hands (litteraly) also playing loud music all day long and walking in circles, people would come to me and ask "are you exercising?" and i don't even remember what i told to them. one day after a dinner with the family i just came home and started playing loud music again, crying and walking in circles and feeling like that was normal. my dad actually saw this, and i'm forever embaressed about that. that right there was a sign of what was about to come. if i only had the brains to go back on the usual dosage of effexor and see what kind of effect it would have on me. but like i said, i was kind of feeling good about the "mania situation". so i just kept going... (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
NaturalBorn Posted October 9, 2016 Author Share Posted October 9, 2016 yes i should really pay more attention to diet also because a lot of things that i eat cause my stomach to get sick, it's amazing how much of your body is affected by this drugs... yeah i really, have some hard time thinking about other people, specially after the hypomania stage, omg i hope that never happends again.... i could never take any suggestion of yours as "nagging" (never knew this word before haha), i'm really thankfull for having you guys and this kind of support. honestly i don't know what i would have done if it wasn't by the internet, i would probably be hooked on a drug cocktail or something, yesterday was an awfull day, was just so worried that didn't left my bed all day... thanks a lot fuerza, and by the way how are you doing now? dealing with some kind of symptom still, or fully healed? Some days are like that and that's okay. I'm doing so-so. Still experiencing pretty severe withdrawal. I try to encourage others because it also helps me. I keep and eye on your thread because I can relate to what you're saying about the feelings of losing hope and missing your youth. Going from a very social and fun lifestyle to this can seem insufferable. My silver lining is that maybe this was what I needed not go overboard with all the partying. Plenty of my friends already suffer from doing drugs too often or drinking too much. Maybe this was the wake'up call I needed. I don't have the strength to think positive thoughts every day. I actually rarely do. But when those days occur, I make sure to say to myself that I will pull myself through this. On the better days I also like to listen to music or read poetry. It's amazing to listen to a song which had no deeper meaning before all this happened to me and to realise that the author might be feeling something similar to me. I am not alone in this. It can be very cathartic to listen to your feelings put into music. Almost like listening to a love song after falling in love for the first time, but a lot darker. Also, the physical therapy idea is great! People go through serious accidents and fully heal. I'm sure you will too. Tudo de bom and keep us updated on your recovery! same here, i sometimes feel better just reading about you guys, because i can relate strongly to this, so that helps. and just like you said, 99% of the days i have no hope at all, and just feels like i'm stucked at some sort of sickness forever. this sucks. music and poetry seems to me like something so distant right now, it's not like if i can't enjoy it, but i just don't relate to that very much this days you know? at least like i used to, i remember that during the hypomania i got REALLY into music and poetry... you described it perfectly, it felt like if i had fall in love for the first time and was listening to a love song. and yes physical therapy helped a lot during rehab, it did not solved it completally, but i could just function a little better when my body is not on that level of discomfort. right now i feel like i wan't to taper my seroquel, praying to god that i don't go crazy on this, at least i'm on a small dosage, there was this 17 years old dude on rehab that was taking 800 mgs perday! i just thought to myself how the hell is he going to get out of that? he was also a pretty carelles and crazy youg kid, he probably have just quit all at once on the day he got out of there, really wish i could talk to him but i lost his number. i'm thinking about going to a psychiatrist this week and get this taper started with. i'm gonna let you guys know all about it. for now my goals are going to be taper the seroquel, start some phisycal therapy, try to stay off the sleeping pills, and pray for the best, i also would like to quit smoking cigs but i think that this will have to wait, plus smoking helps a little when i'm going crazy on anxiety. wish the best for you, please keep me updated on your progress as well, i'm looking foward to the day that we can become sucess stories. thans a lot fuerza, really hope all of us can get some lessons out of this, instead of side effects haha (i'm brazlian so please, ignore spelling mistakes) 2015 the beggining of the year started with effexor xr 37,5 went up to 300mgs in october of 2015 quitted COLD TURKEY/took olanzapine 5mgs for 2 weeks around november/ reinstated effexor in january of 2016 in march of 2016 was at 300mg again in may tappered effexor xr and added trazodone 150mgs, seroquel 50mgs and abilify 10 mgs/in july cold turkey from abilify (no big deal) in september tried reducing trazadone to 50mg after 2 weeks went back to 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel and added 2 mgs of klonopin to use WHEN NEEDEED currently taking 150mgs of trazadone and 50 mgs of seroquel at night Link to comment
Recommended Posts