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Eleven10

Eleven10: 30 months off Prozac

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Eleven10

Maybe it's the antibiotics or the odd zoplicone but I'm more agitated than ever.

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mammaP

Antibiotics have some awful side effects but they do tend to get better when they are finished. How often do you take zopiclone?  Many people react to drugs in withdrawal and the zopiclone could be causing a reaction.

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Eleven10

I take it twice a week. I only take half a 3.75. I really don't think it causing problems as I have only being doing that since Jan and I don't take it every week.

I

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Eleven10

After 3 years plus I shouldn't be living in this physical and mental agony. I don't know what I'm waiting for the pain is relentless

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Eleven10

Should I maybe try the dosulapin again at a lower dose? It did help me sleep a tiny bit better. My dr won't help me much anymore as she says I'm not trying anything properly

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Eleven10

Can someone please please delete my whole thread and account. If I don't make it it's very very important my family don't read how much pain I was in. Please this is important to me. Thank you so much

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ChessieCat

From Post #1:  rules-and-guidelines

 

"Generally, accounts are not deleted.  See If you wish to close your account"

 

 

"Should I maybe try the dosulapin again at a lower dose? It did help me sleep a tiny bit better."

 

This is a decision that only you can make.  If you do try it again I suggest you try a very low dose to see how it goes.

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AliG

Eleven. I'm so very sorry that you're in so much pain. I understand as I've been there myself. These drugs can do terrible things to our minds which includes just wanting it all to go away right now. 

 

This can be both a side effect and withdrawal symptom of psych meds.

 

Whenever I got to that point, I would think of my children . I would keep thinking of them until it was firmly embedded in my brain - what it would do to them if I didn't make it . I know you have children and you have to think of them. You're probably just having a bad night. Hopefully, It will be better in the morning.

 

If you are experiencing SI then it's best to get some face to face help. We are not really equipped to deal with that.

- In the UK, Maytree is an organisation offering respite for people who are suicidal. It is not a hospital or medical facility so they would not be offering drugs. It is free of charge.  There are criteria to meet but I don't know what they are at present. 

http://www.maytree.org.uk/index.php

 

or this :

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/7619-for-those-who-are-feeling-desperate-or-suicidal/

 

These drugs change your brain and I've been where you are. I'm here to say it changes with time and you will look back on this with total incredulity that these thoughts even temporarily crossed your brain for a minute.

 

It gets so much better. Please wait for that . Just keep yourself alive until you can totally heal and then look back with some real perspective on this.

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JanCarol

Hey Eleven -

 

I was on dosulapin (dothiepen)) before my final cocktail, but I can't see from your signature when you were on it, how much you were on, or how you quit. 

 

Your signature only says Prozac, so I'm a bit confused.  Can you please help us out?

 

I'm sorry you're thinking of quitting SA - but I'll remind you that there are people here who will understand, even when it gets really difficult.  That's not something you can find in your day-to-day life.

 

I'd help you with the dosulapin reinstatement - IF I thought it would help - IF I had complete information, but until I have that, I can't begin to make a suggestion.

 

I'm sorry you are suffering.  Perhaps you can reach out to others here at SA.  Your name here is anonymous, your family won't know unless you tell them. 

 

It does get better, and we have found ways to help make it better.  I hope you choose to stay.

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mammaP

Hi Eleven, I just read back though your thread and see that you had to stop the dosulapin because your blood pressure dropped, if you try it again you would need to take a much smaller dose. Did you decide  against the ECT? 

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Eleven10

I spent the night in a clinic but I'm home now, I could not stand the noise.

 

I read with Intrest the article about one theory of withdrawal, it made a lot of sense to me, slightest noises fill me with adrenaline especially when my eyes are closed. If I'm trying to sleep and my daughter coughs or has a shower the feeling is horrific adrenaline swims over me like poison I just don't know how to calm it. My dr whilst she is lovely has lost patience as I refuse meds I doubt she will give me lamictical.

 

Thank you for you support. It meant so much to read when I got home. I felt less alone.

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Madeleine

You are definitely not alone.

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Purplestars22

Hey Eleven10, hope things get better for you soon. I know how tough this can be. Best wishes to you ✨

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scallywag

Hey Eleven10, I'm glad you're home and doing better, at least a little bit.

 

Have you checked out this breathing technique for anxiety and hyper-alerting (Shep recommended it on another thread):

 

The 4-7-8 Breath: Health Benefits & Demonstration

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Eleven10

I have been diagnosed with cfs and fibromyalgia. My dr actually believed the stress of withdrawal sparked it. He has given me a low dose of gabapentin and some tramadol but I'm to try them one at a time.

If I thought going back to Prozac and tapering slowly would help instead I would definitely prefer that but 3 years off is a long time.

Thank you for the breathing thing scally, I have been doing them regularly

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mammaP

Hi Eleven, I would be very careful with tramadol, it is an SNRI and after a while is as hard to stop as venlafaxine. It is also a synthetic opiate which is addictive. I have been taking it for over 10 years and having to taper very very slowly, and suffer from side effects which actually mimis fibro!  If you try it, I would open the capsule and mix the contents with water then take a small amount to see how you are with it. Gabapentin is used for nerve pain and is an anti epileptic. 

It is terrible when you are in pain and can't take anything, sadly lots of us are so sensitive after these drugs that we can't tolerate much of anything. CFS and fibro often seem to be diagnosed while in withdrawal, and while taking the drugs as side effects that can get better after tapering.  There are also interactions between the 2 drugs so you are wise to try them separately. 

 

nteractions between your selected drugs
Moderate gabapentin  tramadol

Applies to: gabapentin, tramadol

Using gabapentin together with traMADol may increase side effects such as dizziness, drowsiness, confusion, and difficulty concentrating. Some people, especially the elderly, may also experience impairment in thinking, judgment, and motor coordination. You should avoid or limit the use of alcohol while being treated with these medications. Also avoid activities requiring mental alertness such as driving or operating hazardous machinery until you know how the medications affect you. Talk to your doctor if you have any questions or concerns. It is important to tell your doctor about all other medications you use, including vitamins and herbs. Do not stop using any medications without first talking to your doctor.

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Eleven10

Thank you mamma p.

I have not started taking them yet, I'm very wary and scared but also scared to stay in so much pain.

I woke in the night with bad akathesia in my body and mind. It has stayed with me all day and is making me very very depressed. The pain in my neck and shoulders with it is horrific. I cried uncontrollably until I was sick.

I really don't know how to climb out of the hole of brutal depression and physical torture. If I could just get a footing and pull myself up enough to see the light nothing would hold me back. I'm a extremely strong person iv overcome tough things before I even knew these drugs existed I just need a break.

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Eleven10

Mamma p is tramadol similar to codeine? I took that after a operation and it gave me terrible anxiety

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mammaP

Yes it is a synthetic opiate and also an SNRI, the same class of drug as effexor. It is very difficult to stop even when side effects are bad. Have you tried epsom salts baths? I have awful pain in my neck and shoulders and epsom salts baths make a big difference, Unfortunately the place I live now doesn't have a bath and I really miss it. I have regular massages that help, they massage my head back and shoulders then I can sleep for a little while.  

 

Tramadol takes up to 2 hours to work and is not suitable for as needed pain relief. It is highly addictive and a controlled drug here.

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Eleven10

Thank you mamma p. It's horrible being in constant pain. I have just had a course of acupuncture but i have not felt any benefit and the needles were extremely painful.

 

I have horrible rage and anger especially after I have slept a more normal amount of time. I find it incredible that I can still be suffering so badly after almost 3 and a half years. If I knew that a drug would fix this for now I would take it without question which is bizarre as 3 years ago I wouldn't take a paracetamol I was terrified.. it's shows how desperate I am to function again and be a mum and not in agony.

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AliG

Hi Eleven. I'm so sorry for your pain. So many of us have it . I guess most of us don't talk about it because it becomes such a constant in our lives.  As Mamma P said the baths can help. I would try them. They do help somewhat.

 

I also have the most terrible anger. I'm not sure what is the direct ( chemical ) result of the drugs and / or what is just pure rage at what has been perpetrated on us by Big pharma and the medical profession in general.

 

I have been almost 3 years which is only slightly behind you , so I very much get it . Unfortunately, the drugs won't fix it - they have created this situation and the only way that I see out of this mess is to forgo them until the body heals of it's own accord naturally and with it's own timetable. It can't be rushed unfortunately no matter how much we wish we could hurry it along. 

 

It takes time and an inordinate amount of patience and I understand that it is in short supply during this experience.

 

It's windows & waves that will keep going on until .......  everyone has their own finite point of healing. 

 

I so hope you find some relief soon . I do understand and my thoughts and prayers are with you .

(( hugs )) Ali

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Eleven10

Thanks Ali.

Rage is horrible and makes me feel like a bad person and pushes people away.

When I have the strength I have a Epsom salts bath.

It's so hard when you have a family. Kids should not be without there mums.

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mammaP

Sending  big squishy Mamma hugs to London, I wish I could take all this away for you. When I get angry I put on music and try clean the house, I say try because I can barely wash the dishes but I have a go and channel the anger. I've always done that, in fact before drugs my family knew if someone upset me or I was worried because the house was clean! Last night I found a video on youtube and loved it. It was a camp fire by the river with water sounds, birdsong and trees. It is amazing and my blood pressure dropped right down in 15 minutes watching that fire! 

 

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AliG

Mamma P. That was the perfect song and sounds. Eleven : I hope you enjoyed that . I'm the same .Throughout this experience music has calmed me. It really does have the power to soothe and calm when everything else seems to be falling apart.

 

Eleven. We really do understand. Hang in there. Listen to music, dance, sing, paint and express yourself. It all helps and I know you will get there in the end. 

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Eleven10

Thank you for your support.

 

I have extreme sensitivity to sound and tinnitus , listening to music is like being tortured most days I will definitely keep it for the future though thank you so much.

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Eleven10

One thing I did want to ask if iv been offered Botox for constant headaches, iv read a little about positive effects on depression as well. I'm obviously wary of it and wondered if anyone had any experience of it?

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AliG

Eleven.  I would not risk Botox. It is a known toxin .It's up to you . Do we know the long term effects of Botox ? I don't think so .The outcome is uncertain. It's dangerous in my view.

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Eleven10

We don't know the long term effects of antibiotics in food or the chemicals in decafinated coffee. Medicine is about risk v benefits. This is my point with antidepressants, I'm not 100% against them, my best friend would not be hear today without a 8 month course of them. My problem is with lack of knowledge of the dangers and non consent. Patients should be given an informed choice, this medication may help you but it may make you very very ill and there is a chance you may never come off them and if you do you will be disabled. If a patient knowing this info still takes the meds it shows how desperate they are for wellness. Of course this will never happen but it should.

Rant over ( not at you Ali, you have been nothing but supportive thank you) x

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Eleven10

My dr explained to me why my mood is so much better when I don't sleep much apparently sleep deprivation temporarily stimulates seratonin and dopamine. who knew!

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Eleven10

I spoke to my therapist today, she agrees I find it hard to deal with being so ill because I was so well on Prozac, I will never take it again but I have to agree I did not know any kind of happiness or real wellness until I found Prozac. I finally felt excitement and enthusiasm for life and energy, I ran my first marathon a year after starting Prozac, I had very little side effects and simply came off because I was so well. I suppose it's hard because I had the psychological addiction as well as the physical.

I have to have an operation to remove endometriosis from my bowel in two months, iv been putting it off for 2 years. My dr agrees I'm not physically or mentally well enough but the pain is extreme. Funnily enough it bothered me the least in all the physical and mental issues. I actually faint with the pain but I genuinely don't care too much, I have to have it done in case it does damage to my bowel or I would leave it. Only the drugs scare me not the pain

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ShakeyJerr

Only the drugs scare me not the pain

 

Then stay strong, my friend!

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mammaP

I had 2 ops in 2015 and was also scared of the drugs but they went ok. I did have some reactions that were a bit scary at the time but recovered well. 

Speak to the anaesthetist about your sensitivities and concerns. My doctors were really good and were very careful with the drugs they used. 

I am sure that relieving that pain will help, even if it is the least of your problems having that pain taken away can make a difference. 

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Eleven10

Thanks mamma p. Yes I'm determined not to cancel again.. I wish I could have it without anaesthetic but apparently that's not possible

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Eleven10

I had the Botox on my neck and 2 weeks later I think the headaches are lifting slightly.

 

Im also starting on lithium but not until iv had a sleep study next month. Feel positive that things my be moving forward.;)

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mammaP

Can you remind me Eleven, why you will be starting lithium, is your doctor prescribing it? It is interesting about the botox in the neck easing a headache. 

 

How did you get a sleep study? I need one but not getting anywhere with gp's, just the merry go round of the same stuff, everything I've tried for years! 

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