MaizeNblue81: Tapering Zoloft during severe acute Xanax WD

[maizeNblue81]

I take everything in and do the best I can with this horrible situation I'm in and I know you may not believe me but I'm trying to hold on but this is pure hell on earth and has gotten so much worse over the last week and I really don't know what to do and I'm just tires of suffering! 

 

Im very thankful for all the support I get and if I didn't have support like I get here the doctors and the nightmare of the drugs would have already killed me! 

[ChessieCat]

The answer to every one of your questions (which you have already asked many times and we have already answered) is we don't know.  If we did know we would tell.  We truly wish we did know the answers to all the members questions but unfortunately we don't.

 

We don't know what will happen if you make a reduction in the Zoloft dose.  We also don't know when is the "right" time for you to make a reduction.  It is your decision if you want to make a reduction, we can't make that decision for you.  If you make a reduction you might feel the same, you might feel a bit better or you might feel worse.  Nobody can predict what will happen.  But this is the reason, if you decide to reduce, it is better for you to try a small reduction (eg about 2.5% or 5% reduction) rather than a 10% reduction.

 

Using the graduated cylinder and measuring 100ml of water with a 100mg tablet these are the dose calculations so that they are round numbers to make it easier for you to measure.

 

It takes about 4 days for the dose change to get to steady state in the blood and longer for it to register in the brain.

 

A full 10% reduction is 78.75mg.

 

NB:  all % reductions are approximate

 

          DOSE      REDUCTION     TO GET DOSE

 

          86mg  =  1.725%               remove 14ml   

             

          85mg  =  2.85%                 remove 15ml

 

          84mg  =  4%                      remove 16ml

 

          83mg  =  5.15%                 remove 17ml

 

          82mg  =  6.275%               remove 18ml

 

          81mg  =  7.45%                 remove 19ml

 

          80mg  =  8.575%               remove 20ml

[maizeNblue81]

Ok thank you I don't know what I'm gonna do as far as hold or try a small drop and I'm not trying to be stubborn about this either way it just seems the Benzo WD is still pretty severe so I don't want to add anymore stress to my brain but I'm not sure the the Zoloft hasn't turned on me and is making it worse so I'm just really confused as to what to do but I will keep everyone posted on that.

 

I know the majority of my symptoms are Benzo related but this is why I never wanted to be put back on meds in the hospital and I tried to tell the crazy doctors that and now it's making it really difficult to know what to do now cause this is the worst wave of symptoms I have experienced by far over the last week and it's just so hard to know what's causing what or what I should do and it was so bad yesterday I would have went to the hospital if I didn't think they would just make me worse 

[maizeNblue81]

Ok this is just a question I'm not trying to complain just concerns me getting worse and trying to understand this? 

 

Current symptoms are still increasing and this is the worst wave I have experienced since Detox back last October! 

 

The severe head pressure burning numbness tightness and physical pain pain in my brain is the worst it's ever been and it's all in my forehead above and behind my eyes in my temples on the sides of my head the top of my head feels like it's burning and so much pressure there any time I move or raise my forehead sends a loud buzzing noise in my ears and it's like someone is taking my forehead and hitting it with a brick and pulling down on it with extreme pain my left ear is clogged all the time now and the pain and pressure runs down into the right side of my head into my neck. 

 

As far as the other physical symptoms it's extreme nausea light headed dizzy restlessness and fatigue extreme anxiety and literally feeling like I'm crawling out of my own skin and can't set still and I even noticed muscle twitches here lately that I've never had before! 

 

 

The emotional symptoms are quite severe and the worst it's ever been severe confusion completely detached form self Brian fog and cognitive issues severe DP/DR the worst it's ever been and extreme intrusive thoughts including SU/HM ideation just constantly there now I literally feel like I'm completely losing my mind and having a psychological breakdown on top of all the physical symptoms just feel really on edge and scared I might lash out at someone it's crazy all this has hit over the last week and has become so severe I'm really starting to question my own sanity or if I will survive this nightmare? 

[ChessieCat]

On 17/08/2017 at 9:09 AM, maizeNblue81 said:

only questions about the Zoloft will I post here going forward

 

[maizeNblue81]

Yes this is a question about what could be causing this massive increase and uptick in my condition Benzo WD or Zoloft that's the question but thank you anyway I do appreciate all the help I've gotten already 

[ChessieCat]

You are not asking NEW questions.  You are repeatedly asking the questions which you have asked before.

 

Before you post a "question" about either your symptoms or your Zoloft please go back over the responses you have already been given.  The response, I am fairy certain, will have already been provided.

 

Please let us know when you decide to commence your Zoloft taper.

[maizeNblue81]

Ok well I haven't had this severe or level of change or increase in my symptoms I'm the whole 10 months I've been off so that was my concern but thank you and I will let you know when I get to the point I can handle the Zoloft 

[BAT]

I have the same issues with my head and ears. It's so bad it makes me just lay in bed a lot.  I have been off antidepressants and xanax for 11 month's but I have taken xanax like 9 times since then. I haven't taken one in 8 weeks. I understand how you feel it's horrible and scary!!

[nz11]

MNB will you be doing the wdl survey? it would be awesome if you could they need to hear your voice.

 

 

 

[maizeNblue81]

Um WD survey? 

[maizeNblue81]

Ok this is a Zoloft question and it scares me. Could this be serotonin syndrome on top of Benzo WD and a major wave after 10 months?   

 

 

Ok well I don't know what is going on whether this is Benzo WD related and I'm in a major wave and just now peaking out with my symptoms after 10 months or if the Zoloft is adding too my troubles but this is the worst I have felt by far since coming out of the hospital and it could be some combination of both Severe Benzo WD related symptoms and whatever the Zoloft is doing to me but most people I talk to say that it sound like a major Benzo wave and to hold on th Zoloft for now until it passes then I have others you say yes the Zoloft could be making it worse someone today even just brought up serotonin syndrome and that scares me to death so I don't know what to do this is horrible!

[nz11]

2 hours ago, maizeNblue81 said:

Um WD survey? 

See my sig

 

Participate in important drug withdrawal survey by August 24

Participate in the survey here http://cepuk.org/2017/08/10/cep-2017-prescribed-drug-withdrawal-survey/

 

 

[TryingToHoldOn]

14 hours ago, maizeNblue81 said:

Ok this is a Zoloft question and it scares me. Could this be serotonin syndrome on top of Benzo WD and a major wave after 10 months?   

 

 

Ok well I don't know what is going on whether this is Benzo WD related and I'm in a major wave and just now peaking out with my symptoms after 10 months or if the Zoloft is adding too my troubles but this is the worst I have felt by far since coming out of the hospital and it could be some combination of both Severe Benzo WD related symptoms and whatever the Zoloft is doing to me but most people I talk to say that it sound like a major Benzo wave and to hold on th Zoloft for now until it passes then I have others you say yes the Zoloft could be making it worse someone today even just brought up serotonin syndrome and that scares me to death so I don't know what to do this is horrible!

There is a possibility that you are having an adverse reaction.  That's why it's so important to listen to your body and keep a log of daily symptoms.  When you generalize "this is the worst" for every symptom, it prevents you taking the appropriate action.

 

Right now your choices are:

1. Don't make any changes and suffer

2. Reduce your Zoloft, monitor for a few days and see if your symptoms improve - even the TINIEST bit.  If it does, this may indicate you're having an adverse reaction.  If it doesn't help, you can stabilize on the reduction dose and cut again when you're feeling 'better'.

 

Either way, it's no picnic.  

 

Good luck to you.

[maizeNblue81]

Well my symptoms continue to get worse and more intense everyday!

 

The severe head pressure burning numbness tightness and physical pain pain in my head is so severe in my forehead above and behind my eyes the top of my head the right side of my face down the right side of me neck in my temples my least ear is completely clogged with pressure can't hear out of it and extreme pain and pressure anytime I move or try to stand or do anything other than lay down! Extreme fatigue and nausea light headed and dizzy it's horrific! 

 

I can't breath it's so intense with extreme anxiety feeling like I'm crawling out of my own skin completely non functioning at all it's the worst it has ever been and continues to get worse everyday and is just as bad now as it was before and right out of the hospital if not worse! 

 

The emotional symptoms are so severe as well completely confused severe DP/DR feeling completely detached from myself and reality severe intrusive thoughts brain fog and cognitive issues I really feel like I'm completely losing my mind and having a psychological breakdown and I'm so scared that I'm not gonna make it or end back in the hospital were they will just make it worse! 

 

As far as the Zoloft this is the second time I've been on it was on it back in 2012 when my panic attacks started for about a year and a half before it stopped working and my panic attacks came back and then of course the Prozac for two years after that and then last may after being off the Prozac for 5-6 months was trying to reinstate after my divorce when all my symptoms came flooding back in and that didn't work was switched over to lexapro and that was a nightmare for over 2 months then was taking off it and realized what the Xanex was doing to me tried to taper that for two months and the severe tolerance WD and probably kindled got so bad I ended up in the hospital and I feel just as bad now as I did then if not much worse after 10 months off the Xanex and of course now I've been back on the Zoloft for 10 months and I've never even known really what it was doing helping or making this so much worse because the Benzo symptoms have been so consistent and severe! 

 

So on the Zoloft I feel like this is hopeless cause it seems the Benzo WD is just now peaking out at 10 months and obviously on a major horrific wave with that and after my history with the Zoloft and the other AD I don't know what it's adding to this or if it ever helped and whether or not it has completely turned on my already and getting no benefit from it at all if I ever did and that scares me!

 

What do I do in this situation? So I have to stay on a drug that may be making me worse and not helping at all? And if it hasn't turned on me there is now way it will hold for 2 years only worked a year and a half before and that was before all these other drugs and o really don't know what to do here because my symptoms are quite severe and I'm really losing hope this will ever get better and it seems like I'm in a impossible situation can't work can't exercise can't take care of me or my kids feeling like I'm getting worse everyday and the symptoms over the last few weeks and even the last couple of days have reached levels I don't know if I've ever experienced before so I really don't know what to do here at all? 

[AliG]

Did you do the survey, Maize? 

[bubble]

On 2017-8-23 at 9:38 AM, TryingToHoldOn said:

There is a possibility that you are having an adverse reaction.  That's why it's so important to listen to your body and keep a log of daily symptoms.  When you generalize "this is the worst" for every symptom, it prevents you taking the appropriate action.

 

Right now your choices are:

1. Don't make any changes and suffer

2. Reduce your Zoloft, monitor for a few days and see if your symptoms improve - even the TINIEST bit.  If it does, this may indicate you're having an adverse reaction.  If it doesn't help, you can stabilize on the reduction dose and cut again when you're feeling 'better'.

Do you read the replies at all?

[maizeNblue81]

Yes I took the survey and I just don't know what to do about any of this 

[AliG]

Please read back over your thread. Everything is there but you have to take the time to read and consolidate. if you did the survey - that is a great thing !

[maizeNblue81]

Well yes I have done the survey and I know and have been doing everything I've been instructed to do at this point but my symptoms and my condition continues to get worse and has steadily increased since the beginning of month 7 now into month 10 worse than I've ever been holding on by a thread with all my symptoms continuing to get worse more severe and more intense it seems everyday and I really don't know what to do? 

 

Cause I know some of this unfortunately for me is still severe Benzo WD and my symptoms finally leaking it seems after all this time but then there is the Zoloft and I've never been able to tell what it was actually doing to me helping or hurting me but after 10 months I know there is a chance of building up tolerance to it and it making things so much worse but to add AD WD to this severe wave of Benzo WD would probably kill me literally so I feel lost and don't know what to do? 

 

My doctors are useless my psych doctor doesn't even acknowledge I can still be in Benzo WD syndrome after 10 months and my PCP doesn't really know enough about it to help other than blood work and to make sure there is nothing physically wrong with me, the ER can't really do anything and if I go back to the hospital they will just look at me like I'm crazy and try to put me on more drugs which will just make this worse! 

 

I don't want to go back on a Benzo due to being in severe tolerance WD and probably had kindled on the Xanex which is what put me in the hospital to begin with and I don't want to keep taking the Zoloft because it could be making me worse but then again to try and come off it now still in severe Benzo WD may just make things so much worse so I really feel like this is a hopeless situation and my symptoms continue to get worse with no end in sight and no answer to this! 

 

I just feel like giving up and there is no hope or end to this!

[Survivor1]

Maize,

 

I wanted to chime in and hopefully provide some perspective:  I have seen on another forum (benzobuddies) that there are quite a few people who are still suffering horribly from Benzo WD even 18 months (sometimes more) out.  I know your symptoms are unbearable, but unfortunately, that may not be unusual for someone that CT'd a benzo.

 

I don't have any suggestions about how to alleviate your pain; what you are experiencing may go on for quite a while longer.  At this point, the best coping may be "simply" acceptance that things will take a while to settle down.

 

I would suggest that you do nothing to the Zoloft as you may end up feeling much worse, and you run the risk of further destabilizing yourself.

 

Having gone through many CT's, reinstatement, drops off large doses, I know how easy it is to get into panic mode from the WD.  But panic feeds itself, and you may need to practice some calming techniques to help you out.  

 

(To help you better, you may want to shorten your posts, or at least punctuate your sentences, as I for one have a hard time digesting what you have written ( I mean this in the best way possible ))

 

All the best.

[Survivor1]

Sorry, I did not read the reply by Bubble/TryingtoHoldOn before my last post.  It's great advice!

[maizeNblue81]

Ok well thank you and I am doing my best to hold on and believe this will get better but the Benzo WD symptoms are so severe I can't hardly function at all and of course it makes it harder when your on another drug and don't know what that is doing to you 

[nz11]

7 hours ago, maizeNblue81 said:

Well yes I have done the survey

Well done to you MNB, you're the best.

[maizeNblue81]

I'm sorry to keep bothering everyone but things are so bad and I feel like this is hopeless and their is no end in sight and I'm losing hope! 

As bad as this has been over the 10 months I've been off and since Detox last October and even as bad as it's been since the beginning of month 7 when I noticed the first increase or wave or change in my condition this wave or whatever it is has just about taking me out over the last few weeks and just seems to be getting worse worse to the point I don't know if I'm gonna survive this both the physical and emotional symptoms are the worst they have ever been and I don't know how much of this is Benzo WD and what the Zoloft is adding to this nightmare but it just keeps getting worse! 

The physical pain pressure burning numbness and tightening in my head is so severe I can't hardly bare it and can't do anything! The pressure has always been in my forehead on top of my head down the right side of my brain above and behind my eyes in my temples but know it's increased to where both sides of my head have so much pressure and pain right ear completely clogged right side of my face and head are completely numb and pressure there and the top of my head is literally on fire and it feels like someone has my brain in a compacter and is taking a fish hook and stabbing it into the middle of my brain and pulling on it! 

This wave has come with major anxiety feeling like I'm crawling out of my own skin can't set still distractions aren't working getting pain and tightness in my chest from the anxiety hard to breath, severe nausea light headed and dizzy just physically sick all over! 

The emotional symptoms are more severe now than they have ever been and are really scaring me the dark place my mind has gone! Severe confusion DP/DR no short term memory brain fog and cognitive issues and horrific evil intrusive thoughts including SU/HM ideation and it is just as bad now as before I went into the hospital if not worse! 

I don't understand after 10 months it's this bad and just keeps getting worse and I'm holding on the Zoloft as suggested and I'm constantly trying to distract and rest can't work can't exercise can't do anything this is horrible! 

I don't know what to do here it just keeps getting worse and I feel like I'm completely losing my mind and having a psychological breakdown and the physical pain is unbearable and I feel like this is hopeless cause I don't want to go back in more drugs and I know the Zoloft may be making me worse but everyone is telling me to try and come off it now would make things even worse and I'm literally holding on by a thread here and don't know what to do?

[ChessieCat]

 

I have a challenge for you.

 

During the day set a reminder to go off every half hour or hour.  When the timer goes off sit in a position which is the most comfortable and spend 3-5 minutes doing controlled deep breathing.  Breathe in as slowly as you can through your nose and concentrate on pushing your belly/stomach outwards so that the bottom of your lungs can fill with air.  Try and hold that for a few seconds and then breathe out as slowly as you can, either through your nose or your mouth, whichever is the most comfortable.

[maizeNblue81]

Ok thank you and I will try! 

 

I just dont understand is this Benzo WD and wave or is the or could the Zoloft really be make my all this worse? 

 

I just dont don't know what to do I'm still holding but all these symptoms continue to increase and are getting worse to where I feel like I'm gonna end up back in the hospital or worse! 

[ChessieCat]

2 hours ago, maizeNblue81 said:

Ok thank you and I will try! 

 

I hope you do.

[maizeNblue81]

I'm in big big trouble here! I don't understand any of this and doctors and the hospital I was detoxed at and putting me back on another drug when the Xanex is what was making me sick has made things so much worse and I'm sure from all of my symptoms my Benzo WD symptoms are peaking and getting worse and I don't think the Zoloft is helping things at all and I'm so confused as to what to do now? 

 

If I keep taking it and I'm already at tolerance or it's aggravating the Benzo WD I need to get off it but with my symptoms already being so severe I don't know if I can handle it so I don't know what to do? 

 

The severe pain pressure burning numbness and physical symptoms in my brain are unbearable and the worst they have ever been I literally can not breath or relax and no distraction is working at all! The extreme anxiety nausea light headed and dizzy just feel like I'm completely crawling out of my own skin just pure hell physically! 

 

The emotional symptoms are horrible and very scary! Severe confusion DP/DR brain fog cognitive issues horrific evil intrusive thoughts major depression can't control my mind at all and it's in such a dark place and it's really getting worse by the day! 

 

So I don't know what percentage of how much is the Benzo WD compared to whatever the Zoloft is doing to me and I don't understand I know coming off the Zoloft would literally kill me right now but I think it's making me worse for taking it so I don't really know what to do? 

 

If I go back to the hospital they are just gonna look at me like I'm crazy and try and put me on more drugs which is not what I want! 

 

These drugs have destroyed my brain and my central nervous system and I don't know if I'm gonna survive this or not?

[maizeNblue81]

I'm sorry to keep bothering everyone here and I'm and very grateful for any help and support that I get but this is really getting worse and I feel like no matter what I do it's the wrong choice and I feel like I'm on the verge of having no choice but to go back to the hospital I'm so sick and I really don't want to do that because I know they will just make it worse! I really don't know what to do about the Zoloft and someone even suggested today doing a micro taper slowly off it but I'm scared to move or do anything it's so bad both the physical and emotional symptoms are getting worse and the worst they have ever been and I know my situation is now complicated by the fact that I'm obviously still in severe acute Benzo WD and symptoms are just now peaking at 10 months off and whatever the Zoloft is adding to this so I really don't know what to do hold on the Zoloft or taper I'm so scared it's so bad! 

[ChessieCat]

I assume from your last two posts that you didn't take up my challenge.  However, even if you didn't do it yesterday, you can still try it today.  There are many things which we have already suggested that I would be trying before even considering going to a hospital.

 

Only you can make the decision about when to start tapering the Zoloft.  You've been given the information for the doses.

 

Weighing up the pros and cons, going to the hospital or making a small reduction in the Zoloft dose, if it was me I know which I would choose.

 

And you are still trying to find answers to questions which have no answers.  Continuing to ask unanswerable questions isn't going to magically make them answerable or provide the answer.  That in itself is enough to drive anyone crazy.  I think it's time for you change your thinking and try something different which might actually make a difference, like the non drug suggestions that we have been suggesting from the beginning.

 

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

 

[maizeNblue81]

Ok well I just read altostata information on why to do a slow taper at 10% and all the information talks about not damaging the CNS but for me that's complicated because mine has already been severely damaged especially by Xanex and I'm already in severe WD form Benzos and probably just now hitting the worst of it and have much more to go before my brain and CNS even recovers from that so that's why I am really scared here and don't know what to do? 

 

Im assuming your choice would be to try and make a slight reduction in the Zoloft and it's even been recommended to micro taper which when I read altostrata information suggests a 10% decrease every 4 weeks to decrease the chance of damage to your CNS and WD symptoms but that's the things and the horrible situation I'm in! I'm already dealing with more than I can handle and or ever imagined I would be going through with the Benzo WD it is simply hell on earth and after 10 months just now getting the worst of it both emotionally and physically and I already feel extremely unstable and between the severe physical pain in my head the high levels of anxiety and the severe emotional symptoms including SU/HM ideation and severe DP/DR I don't know if I can handle it but then again I know it could be adding to this and making me worse so I don't know what to do and it's not because I'm trying to be stubborn or trying to annoy anyone it really is that bad and these symptoms are already so severe I feel like I'm hanging on by a thread and completely losing my mind and dying! 

 

And yes I did also try some breathing exercises today and I'm going to the ER tonight just to get checked out and I'm gonna schedule a appointment with my PCP to see if I can get in with a neurologist I mean I'm trying here and I've been holding on holding on the Zoloft constantly distracting even changed my diet the last week as much as I can but it just keeps getting worse so I'm confused and this is horrible! 

 

Altostarta even talked about the risk of tapering and what speed should be based on the individual situation and with my brain and CNS already in complete agony and trying to survive the Benzo nightmare I'm wandering if it's even safe to taper the Zoloft but then again is it safe to keep taking it? 

 

Thats where im at here just confused and really needing some sound advice and help with this cause like you said the doctors are clueless and they are partly to blame with me being in this situation to begin with and I don't want to go back to the hospital they are the idiots that CT me and put me on Zoloft to begin with so I'm at a loss? 

 

I really do appreciate Ms Cat all your help and I think you more than anyone cause you've at least tried to talk to me and I'm not trying to be difficult I'm not I promise but this really is that bad and I don't know what to do andbim hanging on by a thread here and the doctors aren't much help. 

[BAT]

It is really hard.  I hope everything turns out fine when you go to the ER.  Let us know.

Maybe when/if everything checks out to be fine consider to do a very very small cut in zoloft, even less then 10%. I know it can be very confusing on what the right thing to do is, nobody knows. Im still confused on what to do..  People can give you advice but it's you that has to do what you think is right for you.

[virgo43]

Brother Maize. I am not qualified to give u advice. I understand all ur symptoms and can relate to them. It is excruciatingly painful. U have hundreds of unanswered questions same here. Brother at least u are able to think and walk. Please calm down. It is not possible I know. Wish I was next to u to comfort u. U are getting some sort of sleep. U are able to function cognitively. For a couple days I had mental confusion bc kf the pain.  Please brother call a friend a family member.  My heart is with u. We pray for u. We understand u. Try to stabilize. Take shower. Even thar is difficult. Lie down and rest please. I know how u feel brother

[virgo43]

Brother Maize. Same like me u are asking like a parrot over and over and over. I know how it feels.

How many hours a day can u sleep. When mental confusion and hot flashes hit I can't sleep at all. 

Can u eat?

Are u losing weight?

Are u drinking a lot of water. 

If u can sleep 2-3 hrs that is great. 

 

Western medicine turned both of us to into parrots. 

Drs don't understand

Family even worse

Friends gone

 

[virgo43]

Brother Maize.

We are in the same boat. Boat of parrots. We are both in panic.

Write down ur questions on a piece of paper in short sentences and post here. Same with me. I have ocd bc I am in constant pain. Same like u.

Look at positive side I had terrible few days thrn I stabilise another terrible few days same story over and over.

Brother maize my dear friend.  Calm down.  Same with u it feels like there must be a magic pill something that people hide. What the hell.

Brother can u sleep? 

I am losing weight especially muscle and drinking too much water. 

Brother my heart is with u.

Please be positive. 

If u can write this long it means u are there cognitively.  It means u are able to think. Sometimes I don't know where I am..

How about sunshine?

Can u walk?

Brother calm down please.