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Jay78

Jay78: My chemical assassination

53 posts in this topic

I really can't go into many details right now, as I am in the midst of things. You guys can read my history. I had a mini nervous breakdown after a period of intense life threatening stress, with with a war of nerves from family members, strangers etc. etc. too long of a story. I was misdiagnosed with depression, then as you can read I was repeatedly attacked with drugs.

 

At the moment I can't read a book, go out, hold a conversation... I used to be a computer whiz and I can't re-arrange a few folders on the computer, I am completely drained of any energy, I can't cook for myself, and I suffer from mental pain that ranges from the horrible, completely intolerable pain to the barely tolerable. I 've seen all facets of hell. I 've gone out 10 times in 8 months. I smoke tobacco like a chimney. I 'm terribly addicted to benzos.I am mortified by what I am reading about tardive dysphoria. 

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Invega 9mg tapered to zero over 6 months

Levomepromazine 25mg for 3 months

Citalopram raised from 20mg to 80mg over 3 months, at 80mg for 1 year and 5 months

Venlaxafine raised from 150mg to 450mg over 3 months (after citalopram) maintained for 1 year and 2 months.

Alprazolam from 0.5 to 7(!) mg due to the immense stress of the ads. Down to 2.5mg.

Discontinued abruptly with almost no tapering within a week and a half, against all guidelines first the citalopram then the effexor.

Moclobemide raised from 200mg to 800mg during a month and half discontinued with no tapering.

Fluvoxamine and Venlaxafine 300mg and 450mg, abrupt start, no tapering in discontinuation.

30mg Mirtazapin at night.

Currently on 2.5mg alprazolam, Diazepam 5mg for 1.5 months.

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Let me just add that I 'm nearing 39.

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switched to valium, it helped with my sleep. 

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Jay78 -- Welcome to Surviving Antidepressants (SA)
 
Sorry it's taken a few days for one of us to respond to your post. I don't know what happened with that :unsure:.
 
Being enervated and/or having "low mood" after a period of high stress seems fairly normal to me. I'm sorry that your normal response was viewed as a medical condition and then medicated.
 
The medication history you posted is helpful.

 

Would you copy+paste that into a signature and add month + year to each addition or discontinuation of medication?

Are you currently taking only the alprazolam and diazepam? If not, please clearly  indicate what other medication(s) and dose(s).
Link to user signature settings page.

 

If you're using a phone, that link will switch your view to the desktop version of the site. To switch back to the mobile version, scroll to the bottom of the page and click on the words "Mobile Version"

 
You may find some useful suggestions to deal with symptoms in this topic:
Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms.   Many of the techniques discussed help with physical and cognitive symptoms.

 

Once we get a few more details about your situation, we should be able to point you to discussions and information that will assist you. I hope you'll find the information in the SA forums helpful for your situation. I'm sorry that you are in the position that you need the information, but am glad that you found us.

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Will do, Scally.

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Hi Jay, just wanted to say hi, my heart goes out to you, that is an awful lot of drugs and disontinuations for your body to deal with. 

AsScally said, when we have the dates we can get a bigger picture and offer some suggestions to ease things for you. I am glad that you found us. 

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Thanks for the support guys, it really is martyrdom almost all the time. I ll fix the data. Had an unusual and first in two years great night out with some pot and a little beer and good friends. Not in my wildest dreams, which seems to me the problem, besides the complicated life story, is doable, I won't get my hopes up too high, because I ve been horrible abused pharmaceuticaly. 

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Jay am so sorry your going thru this hell too...am also in the same boat!been CT off so many drugs an fed others to mask WD am also on diazpam...keep reaching out!!you have come to the right place...am also smoking like a chimney too....these angels on here will look after you ❤️

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Am also 38 -39 this year

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By God pinkfairy,  need all the help I can get, I am desolate. 

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Jay -- thanks for posting your medication history as a signature. You have been dealt a very, very lousy hand with all those meds changes in under 2 years, including multiple cold-turkey stops. Those doctors should lose their license, be put on trial and convicted for medical assault and battery, then given a choice: go through the same medications, doses and changes or be shot at dawn the next day.
 
You probably need to prepare yourself that it may take you many months to recover.  You'll need to develop non-drug coping skills to get through this. A few places to look for ideas:
Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms.
The Dr. Claire Weekes Method of Recovering from a Sensitized Nervous System.

You may find inspiration and useful information in other people's progress:
Shep - a member and moderator here at Surviving Antidepressants
Beyond meds - the personal journey of Monica Cassani (aka GiaK)
Success stories forum at Surviving Antidepressants.

 

Please let us know how you are doing and what questions you have.

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Many months as in?

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I was hoping you wouldn't ask because the answer isn't what anyone wants to hear/read: Double digits, most probably not triple digits.

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Thought I 'd be ready for it, I am not. :). Let's see. 

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Jay I am astounded at the way your doctor has prescribed all those drugs.  The recent dosages of velafaxine and fluvoxamine are very very high and along with the mirtazapine it is a wonder you didn't become very seriously ill with serotonin syndrome! 

 

How long have you been taking the benzos? Just wondering if they were also in the toxic cocktail! 

 

You will eventually recover vut will take some time. Everyone is different and the fact that you are functioning is a positive after all those drugs. You will most likely experience what we call windows and waves, where things start to go downhill from time to time (waves) then pick up and feel better, (windows) You can read about that here... 

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/82-the-windows-and-waves-pattern-of-stabilization/

 

Many of us here find fish oil and magnesium help a lot, I wouldn't be without it. These are the only two supplements that we recommend to everyone, many supplements can be good for some and harmful for others but fish oil and magnesium seem to be tolerated by most but not everyone so start with a very low dose and increase gradually. 

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/36-king-of-supplements-omega-3-fatty-acids-fish-oil/?view=findpost&p=100596&hl=magnesium

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1300-magnesium-natures-calcium-channel-blocker/

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Yes benzos have all along there with ever higher dosing due to the stress and anxiety of the ad's. Thanks for the support and the tips.

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Jay, I put the most recent drugs into the interactions checker at drugs. com and there are major interactions, and moderate interactions. It is a wonder that you were not critically ill with life threatening serotonin syndrome. You should report that doctor for malpractice.  :angry:

 

This is the report it is a long one and only a fraction of the drugs you have been precribed but ones that were taken together. 

 

nteractions between your selected drugs
Major diazepam  fluvoxamine

Applies to: diazepam, fluvoxamine

Ask your doctor before using diazePAM together with fluvoxaMINE. This can cause drowsiness, confusion, muscle weakness, fainting, or coma. If your doctor does prescribe these medications together, you may need a dose adjustment or special tests to safely take both medications. It is important to tell your doctor about all other medications you use, including vitamins and herbs. Do not stop using any medications without first talking to your doctor.

Switch to professional interaction data

Major venlafaxine  fluvoxamine

Applies to: venlafaxine, fluvoxamine

Using venlafaxine together with fluvoxaMINE can increase the risk of a rare but serious condition called the serotonin syndrome, which may include symptoms such as confusion, hallucination, seizure, extreme changes in blood pressure, increased heart rate, fever, excessive sweating, shivering or shaking, blurred vision, muscle spasm or stiffness, tremor, incoordination, stomach cramp, nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea. Severe cases may result in coma and even death. You should seek immediate medical attention if you experience these symptoms while taking the medications. Talk to your doctor if you have any questions or concerns. Your doctor may already be aware of the risks, but has determined that this is the best course of treatment for you and has taken appropriate precautions and is monitoring you closely for any potential complications. It is important to tell your doctor about all other medications you use, including vitamins and herbs. Do not stop using any medications without first talking to your doctor.

Switch to professional interaction data

Major fluvoxamine  mirtazapine

Applies to: fluvoxamine, mirtazapine

FluvoxaMINE may significantly increase the blood levels of mirtazapine. This may increase the risk and/or severity of side effects such as dizziness, drowsiness, restlessness, confusion, difficulty concentrating, impairment in thinking and judgment, dry mouth, constipation, low blood pressure, and heart rhythm abnormalities. In addition, combining these types of medications can increase the risk of a rare but serious condition called the serotonin syndrome, which may include symptoms such as confusion, hallucination, seizure, extreme changes in blood pressure, increased heart rate, fever, excessive sweating, shivering or shaking, blurred vision, muscle spasm or stiffness, tremor, incoordination, stomach cramp, nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea. Severe cases may result in coma and even death. You should seek immediate medical attention if you experience these symptoms during treatment. Talk to your doctor if you have any questions or concerns. Your doctor may be able to prescribe alternatives that do not interact, or you may need a dose adjustment or more frequent monitoring to safely use both medications. You should avoid or limit the use of alcohol while being treated with these medications. Also avoid activities requiring mental alertness such as driving or operating hazardous machinery until you know how the medications affect you. It is important to tell your doctor about all other medications you use, including vitamins and herbs. Do not stop using any medications without first talking to your doctor.

Switch to professional interaction data

Major venlafaxine  mirtazapine

Applies to: venlafaxine, mirtazapine

Using venlafaxine together with mirtazapine can increase the risk of a rare but serious condition called the serotonin syndrome, which may include symptoms such as confusion, hallucination, seizure, extreme changes in blood pressure, increased heart rate, fever, excessive sweating, shivering or shaking, blurred vision, muscle spasm or stiffness, tremor, incoordination, stomach cramp, nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea. Severe cases may result in coma and even death. You should seek immediate medical attention if you experience these symptoms while taking the medications. Talk to your doctor if you have any questions or concerns. Your doctor may already be aware of the risks, but has determined that this is the best course of treatment for you and has taken appropriate precautions and is monitoring you closely for any potential complications. It is important to tell your doctor about all other medications you use, including vitamins and herbs. Do not stop using any medications without first talking to your doctor.

Switch to professional interaction data

Moderate alprazolam  venlafaxine

Applies to: alprazolam, venlafaxine

Using ALPRAZolam together with venlafaxine may increase side effects such as dizziness, drowsiness, confusion, and difficulty concentrating. Some people, especially the elderly, may also experience impairment in thinking, judgment, and motor coordination. You should avoid or limit the use of alcohol while being treated with these medications. Also avoid activities requiring mental alertness such as driving or operating hazardous machinery until you know how the medications affect you. Talk to your doctor if you have any questions or concerns. It is important to tell your doctor about all other medications you use, including vitamins and herbs. Do not stop using any medications without first talking to your doctor.

Switch to professional interaction data

Moderate diazepam  venlafaxine

Applies to: diazepam, venlafaxine

Using diazePAM together with venlafaxine may increase side effects such as dizziness, drowsiness, confusion, and difficulty concentrating. Some people, especially the elderly, may also experience impairment in thinking, judgment, and motor coordination. You should avoid or limit the use of alcohol while being treated with these medications. Also avoid activities requiring mental alertness such as driving or operating hazardous machinery until you know how the medications affect you. Talk to your doctor if you have any questions or concerns. It is important to tell your doctor about all other medications you use, including vitamins and herbs. Do not stop using any medications without first talking to your doctor.

Switch to professional interaction data

Moderate alprazolam  fluvoxamine

Applies to: alprazolam, fluvoxamine

Using ALPRAZolam together with fluvoxaMINE may increase the effects of ALPRAZolam. Contact your doctor if you experience extreme drowsiness, confusion, muscle weakness, loss of balance or coordination, feeling light-headed, or fainting. If your doctor does prescribe these medications together, you may need a dose adjustment or special test to safely use both medications. It is important to tell your doctor about all other medications you use, including vitamins and herbs. Do not stop using any medications without first talking to your doctor.

Switch to professional interaction data

Moderate diazepam  mirtazapine

Applies to: diazepam, mirtazapine

Using diazePAM together with mirtazapine may increase side effects such as dizziness, drowsiness, confusion, and difficulty concentrating. Some people, especially the elderly, may also experience impairment in thinking, judgment, and motor coordination. You should avoid or limit the use of alcohol while being treated with these medications. Also avoid activities requiring mental alertness such as driving or operating hazardous machinery until you know how the medications affect you. Talk to your doctor if you have any questions or concerns. It is important to tell your doctor about all other medications you use, including vitamins and herbs. Do not stop using any medications without first talking to your doctor.

Switch to professional interaction data

Moderate alprazolam  mirtazapine

Applies to: alprazolam, mirtazapine

Using ALPRAZolam together with mirtazapine may increase side effects such as dizziness, drowsiness, confusion, and difficulty concentrating. Some people, especially the elderly, may also experience impairment in thinking, judgment, and motor coordination. You should avoid or limit the use of alcohol while being treated with these medications. Also avoid activities requiring mental alertness such as driving or operating hazardous machinery until you know how the medications affect you. Talk to your doctor if you have any questions or concerns. It is important to tell your doctor about all other medications you use, including vitamins and herbs. Do not stop using any medications without first talking to your doctor.

Switch to professional interaction data

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Good Lord...

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You must be thinking, "%&$#, I thought things were bad before I found this site. I wonder what other rotten $%@# news they'll have for me."

 

If we've got the full story from you, that's probably the worst of what there is to tell you. You probably know that benzo tapers are not a walk in the park. If not, THAT's the last of the worst news.

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:)

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Jay -- thanks for posting your medication history as a signature. You have been dealt a very, very lousy hand with all those meds changes in under 2 years, including multiple cold-turkey stops. Those doctors should lose their license, be put on trial and convicted for medical assault and battery, then given a choice: go through the same medications, doses and changes or be shot at dawn the next day.

 

I Totally agree about these doctors,i am furious reading about jay 78 and the drug cocktail he given.when are these doctors going to be  found accountable for there actions ,I am tired of these doctors treating people like this.

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Hi jay78 ,I wish u the best in your recovery ,I am so angry reading your drug cocktail. Dam doctors :angry: 

 

This site has been amazing in helping me understand everything and helping me cope with own drug situation .

 

Take care and all the best.

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Jay78, no matter how long it takes, you WILL get better. Your symptoms will change, I promise. They will not always be this bad. Do whatever you can along the alternative healing route, like meditation, relaxation, and positive self talk, EFT/tapping, and sending yourself, your body and your brain a lot of self-love. Just do your best; it's all any of us can do.

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Should I get my hopes from the gutter as I am managing to watch some tv and I 'm arranging and setting up my computers, not that I can interact more elaborately which was a piece of cake for my former self, but that's something right?

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Having the desire to do that is a very good sign.

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Will cognitive practise as in having to sit through a film, or listen to some educative material be moving towards my mental health, or will it needlessly stress me?

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Try it and see Jay, movies can be a great distraction but I would avoid any with a lot of noise and violence, they tend to be over stimulating. If you can concentrate and learn, then go for it but again don't push too hard. If  your brain is struggling to cope, take a break. You are doing great! 

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You can't believe how grateful I am for this message.

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I can report some success with cbd oil for pain management.

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wow the pain today... unfathomable. 

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That's how it goes Jay, symptoms wax and wane, weird symptoms replace others and there is no logic to any of it! Let them come and go, write them down on paper so that you will be able to see if there is any pattern to them and you can adjust whatever might be affecting you. For instance I noticed looking back that some symptoms seemed to be worse after I had coffee, even though it was decaff. It was so small but I gave up the coffee and that helped a little. 

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don't know what happened today maybe it was the tranquillisers but more so I think it was the cbd. Just as I was embarking on a maddening pain journey, it faded away to 10% and lo and behold I managed to read 70 pages of a book today...

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Thanks Mamma will do.

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pain and even more pain. excruciating. 

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Hang in there Jay, put some epsom salts in a warm bath and soak on it, it really helps me.

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Hi jay stay strong it will pass ,i have a break today after pretty rough 10 days,i watched alot of comedy to force my thinking differently but its dam hard.

peace comes to us all i believe that .

Take care .

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