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Pennylane34

Pennylane34 My recovery story 2011- 2017

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Pennylane34   
Pennylane34

Hi all!

 

Just wanted to check in here and say hello to everyone- new and old!  I am an older member of the old group back on Paxil Progress and I decided to come on here and share my story since I haven't been on in quite a few years.

 

Anyhow- I hope this provides you all with HOPE.  As I know in the beginning/throws of my withdrawal journey- HOPE-from the stories of others are the only things that kept me going some days.

 

So to provide you with some background- I was always a rambunctious, vivacious, fun loving personality- with a tendency to be a little anxious-with mild OCD- and sometimes even a little depressed.  But looking back now- I think a lot of that could've been chalked up to nutritional allergies, deficiencies and just overall bad sleep/lifestyle habits.  Hindsight is definitely 20/20.  However back in 1999, when I was 13- my parents decided to put me on Zoloft, which was a new drug on the market back then.  I immediately was calmer, sleepier and somewhat content with everything and everyone around me.  Then from there I went on to Lexapro, then Celexa then ultimately Prozac.  This continued for about 12 years.  Then at around the age of 25 (after multiple brief failed attempts to quit SSRI's)  I just decided it was 'time.'  The years I was on SSRI's I was happy, content and sleepy.  ALL THE TIME.  Most people would say "well what's wrong with that?"  I guess a small part of my soul longed for a life that had a full range of emotions and an appreciation for the ups and downs in life that force us to grow as people.  I was ready to look beyond my protective shield of antidepressants and face the world head on.  And I knew this was going to be a long road and a process but I knew I had to do it- there was no looking back.

 

October 2011 is when I took my last dose of Prozac-  I felt fine for about a week or so following that.  And then BAM.  I was hit with 24/7 brain fog, EXTREME anxiety, suicidal depression, allergies, insomnia, headaches, fatigue, bloating, adrenal/thyroid dysfunction, low grade fever, hair loss and OCD. 

 

I was literally clinging to the thought that 'this will get better, it's just drug withdrawal' for the first three months - changing everything about my life to help me- my diet, my sleeping habits, getting a less stressful job, etc etc.  But withdrawal was like a black cloak around me back in those days- it was complete misery and I was so hopeless and helpless back then- NOBODY- and I mean NOBODY understood other than the folks in these forums.

 

In early 2012 I linked up with a TCM doctor and he got me on a regime of vitamins, supplements, Chinese herbs and Bach Flower essences- this did very little at the time- but I clung to the little it did do as hope that underneath all this muck- I could be a 'normal' person one day.  I struggled on...

Later in 2012 I was introduced to acupuncture- that brought another glimmer of hope into my life and pushed me a little bit further along.  I was still underwater- but I was now starting to swim to the surface.

 

In early 2013- I linked up with a homeopath and she took my case and I worked with her consistently for about 2 solid years after that until mid- 2015.

 

Around late 2014/early 2015 I started to realize that I was not needing all these 'interventions' as often as I did in the beginning of my journey.  I could go months and months without any acupuncture or homeopathy or even a vitamin supplement and feel FINE.

 

It was GREAT!

 

Nowadays,  I am fairly 'normal.'  I have more good days than bad days.  However though- even though my emotional/mental capacities returned- my physical body never fully recovered.

 

I have chronic fatigue/adrenal/thyroid dysfunction.  I have pretty serious food/environmental allergies that forces me to have to be EXTREMELY diligent with my diet or else I suffer bad reactions.  I am HYPERSENSITIVE to vitamins, supplements, caffeine, alcohol, you name it, etc etc etc.  This is all in direct correlation to my coming off of SSRI's.  So it's not all roses- but- I do have hope that sometime in the future these will become less bothersome and hopefully dissipate with time.  Only time will tell though.

 

Anyhow, I just wanted to share my experience and recovery - as my journey may look different from yours- we are all trying to reach the same goal in the end!  

To be happy and healthy!

 

All the best now and in the future!

Penny

 

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Trinities   
Trinities

Wow, you were on these poisons for an extremely long time - Half of your life. Your brain grew in conjunction with that. I would except you would never recover.
It could have been much worse to you.
 

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Pennylane34   
Pennylane34

Thank you for that suggestion. I can't tolerate any herbs at this point or anything that stimulates the nervous system really other than very low doses of vitamins and minerals. But it's interesting to hear others experiences and what helps them :)

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stan   
stan

hi Pennylane,

 

thanks for your story

 

i am 8 years off, not young

i suffer also from chronic fatigue and many other things

 

do you working a full time job ?

 

i am retired, but would not be able to work

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LexAnger   
LexAnger

Thank you so much penny's and for giving hope to everyone still on the road!

 

How long did you taper the Prozac? Were you able to work since off the med?

 

I believe so too that with more time you will recover fully, not much else can help, possibly even better to stay away from all those.

 

Lex

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brassmonkey   
brassmonkey

Sorry Trinities but I had to remove your suggestion for treatment.  SA does not allow recommendations of  restricted drugs for treatment of WD symptoms.  The drug you mentioned is classified as a Schedule 1 Controlled Substance through out most of the world and is illegal to possess. Please refrain from making such suggestions in the future.

 

Brassmonkey

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Mort81   
Mort81

U will def be 100% physically at some point soon. You are so young! Congrats!

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Pennylane34   
Pennylane34

hi Pennylane,

 

thanks for your story

 

i am 8 years off, not young

i suffer also from chronic fatigue and many other things

 

do you working a full time job ?

 

i am retired, but would not be able to work

Hi Stan,

 

I do work a full time job now, with minimal issues so long as I get at least 8 hours of sleep each night.  In the beginning though I was nearly bed ridden- for the first 3 months.  And I still managed to work part time during that.  Then once I linked up with the TCM doctor- he got me to a place where I was at least 50 % functioning- and went into a full time job in the corporate world of advertising.  I have parents who didn't believe me, take any interest or even consider what was happening to me- they just carried on as if it was 'all in my head'- so 'not working' at 25 years old- wasn't an option for me.  And although I REALLY resent them for that- I am grateful that I literally forced myself out of the house to go to work- and that was all I did at the time. It also kept me connected to the world and forced me not to dwell 100% of the time on what was happening to me.   It was bed, work, bed.  I had no social life- or a very little one- the first 6 months.  

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Pennylane34   
Pennylane34

Thank you so much penny's and for giving hope to everyone still on the road!

 

How long did you taper the Prozac? Were you able to work since off the med?

 

I believe so too that with more time you will recover fully, not much else can help, possibly even better to stay away from all those.

 

Lex

Hi Lex!

 

I tapered extremely quickly- over about a month or so.  So I started tapering in September 2011 and then was totally off by mid-October 2011.  At the time, I worked in retail banking - so I was able to work half days and have a staggered schedule but it was still VERY stressful.  Especially since I had to interface with the public for most of the day.  Once I was 6 months into w/d- February 2012- I got a job in corporate advertising-which is actually a pretty socially interactive industry- I kept to myself pretty much for the first year I worked there due to w/d.

 

Also, it is my pleasure to share my experience with all of you in hopes that it will help you and give you the strength to keeping moving forward.  Time goes fast.  It doesn't seem like that when you're in the throws of it- but looking back now- 5.5 years has flown!  I experienced so many symptoms in the beginning of my withdrawal that I don't even remember them all now! LOL  And if I can recover, being on them for a huge portion of my life- ANYONE can :)

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Pennylane34   
Pennylane34

U will def be 100% physically at some point soon. You are so young! Congrats!

 

Thanks Mort81!  I am 31 now LOL so hopefully you are right!

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rowinghippy   
rowinghippy

Nowadays,  I am fairly 'normal.'  I have more good days than bad days.  However though- even though my emotional/mental capacities returned- my physical body never fully recovered.

 

I have chronic fatigue/adrenal/thyroid dysfunction.  I have pretty serious food/environmental allergies that forces me to have to be EXTREMELY diligent with my diet or else I suffer bad reactions.  I am HYPERSENSITIVE to vitamins, supplements, caffeine, alcohol, you name it, etc etc etc.  This is all in direct correlation to my coming off of SSRI's.  So it's not all roses- but- I do have hope that sometime in the future these will become less bothersome and hopefully dissipate with time.  Only time will tell though.

 

I'm glad to hear you're doing better. 

 

I'm curious if you've seen any improvements in your physical health as time progressed despite it still being less than perfect? I'm suffering horribly mostly from physical effects and pretty hopeless that my body will ever recover.

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Pennylane34   
Pennylane34

Oh absolutely. I was WAY worse off physically in the beginning. I'm actually a 100% functional human being now. Most days I forget that I even am still somewhat 'off' physically. Like my symptoms aren't the main focal point of my life anymore. Over time my body has healed/adapted/created new neural pathways-where I can do just about anything a regular, 'healthy' person can do. I have had setbacks over the years-but overall-I've gotten much better. Truly the answer lies in your diet, sleep patterns and just overall time. And trying as best you can to believe that you will get better. My story is unqiue. Most people physically recover 100%-I am the exception-not the rule.

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Bluebird2009   
Bluebird2009

Hi all!

 

Just wanted to check in here and say hello to everyone- new and old!  I am an older member of the old group back on Paxil Progress and I decided to come on here and share my story since I haven't been on in quite a few years.

 

Anyhow- I hope this provides you all with HOPE.  As I know in the beginning/throws of my withdrawal journey- HOPE-from the stories of others are the only things that kept me going some days.

 

So to provide you with some background- I was always a rambunctious, vivacious, fun loving personality- with a tendency to be a little anxious-with mild OCD- and sometimes even a little depressed.  But looking back now- I think a lot of that could've been chalked up to nutritional allergies, deficiencies and just overall bad sleep/lifestyle habits.  Hindsight is definitely 20/20.  However back in 1999, when I was 13- my parents decided to put me on Zoloft, which was a new drug on the market back then.  I immediately was calmer, sleepier and somewhat content with everything and everyone around me.  Then from there I went on to Lexapro, then Celexa then ultimately Prozac.  This continued for about 12 years.  Then at around the age of 25 (after multiple brief failed attempts to quit SSRI's)  I just decided it was 'time.'  The years I was on SSRI's I was happy, content and sleepy.  ALL THE TIME.  Most people would say "well what's wrong with that?"  I guess a small part of my soul longed for a life that had a full range of emotions and an appreciation for the ups and downs in life that force us to grow as people.  I was ready to look beyond my protective shield of antidepressants and face the world head on.  And I knew this was going to be a long road and a process but I knew I had to do it- there was no looking back.

 

October 2011 is when I took my last dose of Prozac-  I felt fine for about a week or so following that.  And then BAM.  I was hit with 24/7 brain fog, EXTREME anxiety, suicidal depression, allergies, insomnia, headaches, fatigue, bloating, adrenal/thyroid dysfunction, low grade fever, hair loss and OCD. 

 

I was literally clinging to the thought that 'this will get better, it's just drug withdrawal' for the first three months - changing everything about my life to help me- my diet, my sleeping habits, getting a less stressful job, etc etc.  But withdrawal was like a black cloak around me back in those days- it was complete misery and I was so hopeless and helpless back then- NOBODY- and I mean NOBODY understood other than the folks in these forums.

 

In early 2012 I linked up with a TCM doctor and he got me on a regime of vitamins, supplements, Chinese herbs and Bach Flower essences- this did very little at the time- but I clung to the little it did do as hope that underneath all this muck- I could be a 'normal' person one day.  I struggled on...

 

Later in 2012 I was introduced to acupuncture- that brought another glimmer of hope into my life and pushed me a little bit further along.  I was still underwater- but I was now starting to swim to the surface.

 

In early 2013- I linked up with a homeopath and she took my case and I worked with her consistently for about 2 solid years after that until mid- 2015.

 

Around late 2014/early 2015 I started to realize that I was not needing all these 'interventions' as often as I did in the beginning of my journey.  I could go months and months without any acupuncture or homeopathy or even a vitamin supplement and feel FINE.

 

It was GREAT!

 

Nowadays,  I am fairly 'normal.'  I have more good days than bad days.  However though- even though my emotional/mental capacities returned- my physical body never fully recovered.

 

I have chronic fatigue/adrenal/thyroid dysfunction.  I have pretty serious food/environmental allergies that forces me to have to be EXTREMELY diligent with my diet or else I suffer bad reactions.  I am HYPERSENSITIVE to vitamins, supplements, caffeine, alcohol, you name it, etc etc etc.  This is all in direct correlation to my coming off of SSRI's.  So it's not all roses- but- I do have hope that sometime in the future these will become less bothersome and hopefully dissipate with time.  Only time will tell though.

 

Anyhow, I just wanted to share my experience and recovery - as my journey may look different from yours- we are all trying to reach the same goal in the end!  

To be happy and healthy!

 

All the best now and in the future!

Penny

Fabulous news and great to hear there is recovery. Can I ask how you deal with the hypersensitivity if you take ill and need something?

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Pennylane34   
Pennylane34

I can take tiny (and I mean tiny) minute doses of vitamins and minerals without a problem. I haven't taken a serious prescription drug since I came off Prozac. Whenever I've gotten the flu or strep or anything of the like-I've taken Olive Leaf (an herbal antibacterial, antiviral plant) or consulted with my homeopath. The only thing I take consistently with little to no problem is my daily 15mg of Armour thyroid-which I see a holistic endocrinologist for.

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Bluebird2009   
Bluebird2009

Oh my it must be a Prozac problem then as I am exactly the same. I am glad you have posted this as I have something to show my GP. He doesn't believe in medication sensitivity. Horrible man that he is. Take care

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Evoldnahturt   
Evoldnahturt

Wow, you were on these poisons for an extremely long time - Half of your life. Your brain grew in conjunction with that. I would except you would never recover.

It could have been much worse to you.

 

 

From the stories I've read, most people that take care of themselves seem to recover.  I've looked in to the cases where people don't seem to be making much progress and keep finding admissions of things like taking psychoactive substances or not cleaning up their diet.  Some of these people claim to be doing everything right and I'm sure some of them are, but it seems like the majority of the people that take care of themselves do end up healing.  Even many people that don't take good care of themselves seem to heal, if they aren't too rough on their nervous system.

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Tootsieroll   
Tootsieroll

Thank you for that suggestion. I can't tolerate any herbs at this point or anything that stimulates the nervous system really other than very low doses of vitamins and minerals. But it's interesting to hear others experiences and what helps them :)

Pennylane- if you don't mind me asking, what homeopath treatment did you use? Was it helpful? I am currently on Calc Carb 200c and it has been helping somewhat but I prove on it in the form of headaches, which I never suffer from normally. Thanks.

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Pennylane34   
Pennylane34

 

Thank you for that suggestion. I can't tolerate any herbs at this point or anything that stimulates the nervous system really other than very low doses of vitamins and minerals. But it's interesting to hear others experiences and what helps them :)

Pennylane- if you don't mind me asking, what homeopath treatment did you use? Was it helpful? I am currently on Calc Carb 200c and it has been helping somewhat but I prove on it in the form of headaches, which I never suffer from normally. Thanks.

 

 

Hi Tootsieroll!

 

Homeopathy is VERY individualistic- and there are 100,000's of remedies out there now.  I would always consult with a classical homeopath with at least 10+ years of experience- who gives one dose and then waits to see what it does.  Taking remedies too often can be dangerous and cause more harm then good!  I am of the mentality less is more with homeopathy- definitely look up the materia medica of whatever you are taking.  I wish I could give you more insight but I am not qualified to.

 

Let me know how you fair with homeopathy!  I am always interested in hearing others experiences with it.  I found it life changing.

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Distraut   
Distraut

Hi Pennylane34

 

Congratulations on your healing and thank you so much for coming to the Forum to give us hope!

 

You mentioned OCD as one of your symptoms.  My son, Akrontes, on whose behalf I am posting, is suffering from severe OCD which he did not have before starting on medication and which I think resulted from his past "cold turkeys".  It is now nearly a year since he stopped taking Sertraline, and is now on a low dose of Remiron which has never done anything for the OCD, but I am so hoping that this is a withdrawal symptom and will clear with time.  He is also having some CBT therapy but his life is pretty miserable at present and he spends most of the time in his room.  This obsession seems to be his major problem.  He does not present with physical symptoms, apart from a severe headache from time to time.  Can you tell me about your experience with this symptom and how you dealt with it?  I would be most grateful to hear your views.

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Tootsieroll   
Tootsieroll

 

 

Thank you for that suggestion. I can't tolerate any herbs at this point or anything that stimulates the nervous system really other than very low doses of vitamins and minerals. But it's interesting to hear others experiences and what helps them :)

Pennylane- if you don't mind me asking, what homeopath treatment did you use? Was it helpful? I am currently on Calc Carb 200c and it has been helping somewhat but I prove on it in the form of headaches, which I never suffer from normally. Thanks.

 

 

Hi Tootsieroll!

 

Homeopathy is VERY individualistic- and there are 100,000's of remedies out there now.  I would always consult with a classical homeopath with at least 10+ years of experience- who gives one dose and then waits to see what it does.  Taking remedies too often can be dangerous and cause more harm then good!  I am of the mentality less is more with homeopathy- definitely look up the materia medica of whatever you are taking.  I wish I could give you more insight but I am not qualified to.

 

Let me know how you fair with homeopathy!  I am always interested in hearing others experiences with it.  I found it life changing.

 

 

Thanks for the reply!  I am working with a classical homeopath and since I am a newbie to the homeopath world, I didn't want to follow instructions blindly and feel more comfortable with anecdotal examples.  I was hoping you were a fellow Calc carb lol.  Homeopathy is no joke.  I take it in a water/alcohol solution and I arrogantly looked at it and thought "this is water, how much harm can it do anyways?"  boy was i wrong.  I was taking 5 drops twice a week and I was hit with a headache that no tylenol or coffee or peppermint could antidote.  I finally antidoted it by laying under an electric heating blanket since homeopathy works on an energetic level.  I was told to dilute the solution even further to avoid the headaches.  So far so good.  Next month I will be given one dose of 1M calc carb.  "I found it life changing"  I think I will soon toot the same horn.  So far it has helped me come out of my shell a bit and feeling less inwardly focused and it's only been over a month!  It is causing a lot of healing behind the scenes and I can't wait to see who I am once I am completely out of this.

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Tootsieroll   
Tootsieroll

Hi Pennylane34

 

Congratulations on your healing and thank you so much for coming to the Forum to give us hope!

 

You mentioned OCD as one of your symptoms.  My son, Akrontes, on whose behalf I am posting, is suffering from severe OCD which he did not have before starting on medication and which I think resulted from his past "cold turkeys".  It is now nearly a year since he stopped taking Sertraline, and is now on a low dose of Remiron which has never done anything for the OCD, but I am so hoping that this is a withdrawal symptom and will clear with time.  He is also having some CBT therapy but his life is pretty miserable at present and he spends most of the time in his room.  This obsession seems to be his major problem.  He does not present with physical symptoms, apart from a severe headache from time to time.  Can you tell me about your experience with this symptom and how you dealt with it?  I would be most grateful to hear your views.

 

Sorry if I am hijacking this thread but I just wanted to say that OCD was my nemesis during my whole process.  Mine were both mental and physical compulsions so the only way I could believe the improvements was to see the physical improve with time.  When I cold turkeyed each time, my OCD would skyrocket off the charts and it lead to a lot of anxiety and amplify all the other symptoms when I couldn't stop the repetitive thinking/actions.  Well, I'm here to say it does end and it does abate as one heals.  I am a bit of a perfectionist and that will always be with me but the OCD that was experienced during the chemical detox/withdrawal was unreal.  I couldn't believe a mind could work in such a broken record way.  Now I know it can, only because I experienced it and I also know that it does get better...because of where I am today.  What helped me was getting my cortisol tested and once I found out it was high, I used Relora to continuously stabilize it.  It didn't completely eliminate the OCD like time did, but it sure did help during the rough moments.  I wish your son a speedy recovery.

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Distraut   
Distraut

Tootsieroll, that is SO reassuring to hear!  Thank you for giving me hope that this will clear with time!

 

How long did it continue for you?  Did it gradually diminish?  How do you test for cortisol levels?

 

Sorry for all the questions, but any information you could give me about this horrible affliction would be most welcome.  I hate to see him suffer like this.

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Distraut   
Distraut

Naturally, the CBT therapist is most bemused that he could EVEN THINK that the CBT was caused by medication in the first place!

 

What are others experience of trying to treat withdrawal OCD with CBT therapy ?  Is it any help at all or is it like trying to flog a dead horse?  Any anecdotal experiences of this would be MOST welcome.

 

Thank you for your help

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Pennylane34   
Pennylane34

Tootsieroll, that is SO reassuring to hear!  Thank you for giving me hope that this will clear with time!

 

How long did it continue for you?  Did it gradually diminish?  How do you test for cortisol levels?

 

Sorry for all the questions, but any information you could give me about this horrible affliction would be most welcome.  I hate to see him suffer like this.

Hi Distraut!

 

I am so sorry your son is going through this at this time.  I actually have had mild/moderate OCD since I was a child.  I had a VERY controlling mother and it took me a long time to realize that my OCD was born of her making me feel worthless & powerless.  Presently, it only comes on during very stressful/anxious times and to a much lesser extent then in my childhood days.  That being said- I second Tootsie's comment- THE OCD I EXPERIENCED AFTER COMING OFF MEDS WAS OFF THE CHARTS- UNREAL.  What helped me MOST with this symptom was - homeopathy, b vitamins (low/moderate doses) and getting off gluten!  I cannot stress how harmful gluten is to the gut/brain.  Please research that- I could've saved myself a lot of horror if I would've came off gluten sooner in my withdrawal.  It truly is something none of us should be having.

 

Also, you mentioned he is on Remiron?  I am not familiar with that drug.  However, (and this is only my opinion) true healing will begin when he is off all SSRIs.  Unfortunately that has been my experience- I am not a doctor- that is just my experience.

 

Please keep us posted as to how he is doing.

 

Hugs!

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Pennylane34   
Pennylane34

Naturally, the CBT therapist is most bemused that he could EVEN THINK that the CBT was caused by medication in the first place!

 

What are others experience of trying to treat withdrawal OCD with CBT therapy ?  Is it any help at all or is it like trying to flog a dead horse?  Any anecdotal experiences of this would be MOST welcome.

 

Thank you for your help

CBT works, I've tried it in the past- there is scientific evidence that if you actively change your thoughts- it rewires the brain to think/reactive differently.

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Pennylane34   
Pennylane34

 

 

 

Thank you for that suggestion. I can't tolerate any herbs at this point or anything that stimulates the nervous system really other than very low doses of vitamins and minerals. But it's interesting to hear others experiences and what helps them :)

Pennylane- if you don't mind me asking, what homeopath treatment did you use? Was it helpful? I am currently on Calc Carb 200c and it has been helping somewhat but I prove on it in the form of headaches, which I never suffer from normally. Thanks.

 

 

Hi Tootsieroll!

 

Homeopathy is VERY individualistic- and there are 100,000's of remedies out there now.  I would always consult with a classical homeopath with at least 10+ years of experience- who gives one dose and then waits to see what it does.  Taking remedies too often can be dangerous and cause more harm then good!  I am of the mentality less is more with homeopathy- definitely look up the materia medica of whatever you are taking.  I wish I could give you more insight but I am not qualified to.

 

Let me know how you fair with homeopathy!  I am always interested in hearing others experiences with it.  I found it life changing.

 

 

Thanks for the reply!  I am working with a classical homeopath and since I am a newbie to the homeopath world, I didn't want to follow instructions blindly and feel more comfortable with anecdotal examples.  I was hoping you were a fellow Calc carb lol.  Homeopathy is no joke.  I take it in a water/alcohol solution and I arrogantly looked at it and thought "this is water, how much harm can it do anyways?"  boy was i wrong.  I was taking 5 drops twice a week and I was hit with a headache that no tylenol or coffee or peppermint could antidote.  I finally antidoted it by laying under an electric heating blanket since homeopathy works on an energetic level.  I was told to dilute the solution even further to avoid the headaches.  So far so good.  Next month I will be given one dose of 1M calc carb.  "I found it life changing"  I think I will soon toot the same horn.  So far it has helped me come out of my shell a bit and feeling less inwardly focused and it's only been over a month!  It is causing a lot of healing behind the scenes and I can't wait to see who I am once I am completely out of this.

 

so excited to hear how you do after the 1M!  Healing crisis' can occur with homeopathy- I have experienced them myself.  But it has always brought me to another level of healing thereafter :)  Talk to your homeopath about LM potencies- I find them to be gentler.

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Tootsieroll   
Tootsieroll

No problem!  I can only speak the truth from my own experience.  I still have some OCD today when under stressful situations.  It rears it's ugly head but of course this is nothing like it was at the beginning!  I would say it started to become less of an issue 2 years into healing.  I'm now past 3 years and I anticipate by 4 years I'll be good as new.  Now let me remind you that it wasn't all bad for 3 years straight.  I had days where I was able to get a handle on it and not let it dampen my days, as long as I kept my days stress free.  From personal experience, I don't find CBT very helpful when I was in the thick of it.  Though it helped get me out and interacting.  I just found it hard to retain those skills when my brain kept resetting itself the next morning. I found talk therapy more helpful to get my pent up emotions out and yes not even professionals believe the meds can create OCD. 

 

I agree with Penny.  Healing doesn't truly happen till one is completely med free.  I found as I was on the medication merry go round that any new med I added simply kept my symptoms and thought patterns stuck.  They didn't get worse but they certainly couldn't improve.  I hope this was helpful.

 

 

EDIT: I multiquoted your replies but somehow it didn't show.  Sigh..I'm not forum savvy lol.

 

"Tootsieroll, that is SO reassuring to hear!  Thank you for giving me hope that this will clear with time!

 

How long did it continue for you?  Did it gradually diminish?  How do you test for cortisol levels?

 

Sorry for all the questions, but any information you could give me about this horrible affliction would be most welcome.  I hate to see him suffer like this."

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Tootsieroll   
Tootsieroll

 

 

 

 

Thank you for that suggestion. I can't tolerate any herbs at this point or anything that stimulates the nervous system really other than very low doses of vitamins and minerals. But it's interesting to hear others experiences and what helps them :)

Pennylane- if you don't mind me asking, what homeopath treatment did you use? Was it helpful? I am currently on Calc Carb 200c and it has been helping somewhat but I prove on it in the form of headaches, which I never suffer from normally. Thanks.

 

 

Hi Tootsieroll!

 

Homeopathy is VERY individualistic- and there are 100,000's of remedies out there now.  I would always consult with a classical homeopath with at least 10+ years of experience- who gives one dose and then waits to see what it does.  Taking remedies too often can be dangerous and cause more harm then good!  I am of the mentality less is more with homeopathy- definitely look up the materia medica of whatever you are taking.  I wish I could give you more insight but I am not qualified to.

 

Let me know how you fair with homeopathy!  I am always interested in hearing others experiences with it.  I found it life changing.

 

 

Thanks for the reply!  I am working with a classical homeopath and since I am a newbie to the homeopath world, I didn't want to follow instructions blindly and feel more comfortable with anecdotal examples.  I was hoping you were a fellow Calc carb lol.  Homeopathy is no joke.  I take it in a water/alcohol solution and I arrogantly looked at it and thought "this is water, how much harm can it do anyways?"  boy was i wrong.  I was taking 5 drops twice a week and I was hit with a headache that no tylenol or coffee or peppermint could antidote.  I finally antidoted it by laying under an electric heating blanket since homeopathy works on an energetic level.  I was told to dilute the solution even further to avoid the headaches.  So far so good.  Next month I will be given one dose of 1M calc carb.  "I found it life changing"  I think I will soon toot the same horn.  So far it has helped me come out of my shell a bit and feeling less inwardly focused and it's only been over a month!  It is causing a lot of healing behind the scenes and I can't wait to see who I am once I am completely out of this.

 

so excited to hear how you do after the 1M!  Healing crisis' can occur with homeopathy- I have experienced them myself.  But it has always brought me to another level of healing thereafter :)  Talk to your homeopath about LM potencies- I find them to be gentler.

 

I will ask them for sure!  I'll keep you posted on the 1M when I receive it next month :)

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Distraut   
Distraut

Thank you SO MUCH for your reassuring words Tootsie and Penny.  I hope and pray that these tormenting thoughts will soon pass as will he be able to completely stop his tiny dose of medication in the very near future.

 

Thank you for sharing your experiences!

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Distraut   
Distraut

Thank you Tootsieroll.

 

On reflection on looking back, I think his OCD originally emerged after his previous cold turkeys from Paxil.  Going back on medication alleviated his symptoms somewhat but his thinking was skewed for many years, for example thinking that thoughts going through his mind could have a damning effect on his family members.  He stopped taking Sertraline cold turkey in May 2016 and after 6 months into WD, whilst attempting some self-therapy from a book he had read he gave himself a MAJOR obsession which was further exacerbated by some Exposure and Response therapy in which the therapist tipped him further over the edge.  This particular obsession has been driving him crazy since mid-November 2016 when he was put on Mirtazapine/Remeron which has never done anything to assist with this horrible symptom and which he is now taking at a low dose.

 

I am just dying for it to pass!

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Pennylane34   
Pennylane34

Thank you Tootsieroll.

 

On reflection on looking back, I think his OCD originally emerged after his previous cold turkeys from Paxil.  Going back on medication alleviated his symptoms somewhat but his thinking was skewed for many years, for example thinking that thoughts going through his mind could have a damning effect on his family members.  He stopped taking Sertraline cold turkey in May 2016 and after 6 months into WD, whilst attempting some self-therapy from a book he had read he gave himself a MAJOR obsession which was further exacerbated by some Exposure and Response therapy in which the therapist tipped him further over the edge.  This particular obsession has been driving him crazy since mid-November 2016 when he was put on Mirtazapine/Remeron which has never done anything to assist with this horrible symptom and which he is now taking at a low dose.

 

I am just dying for it to pass!

Hey Distraut,

 

As someone who has had on and off OCD ranging from mild to severe throughout my entire life- I will tell you this... ERP (exposure response therapy) can be WAY too harsh on someone in withdrawal.  The level of OCD that I experienced skyrocketed to a whole other level in SSRI w/d.  And ERP is a little too invasive for someone with that level of OCD- in my opinion.  Start slow with CBT- and then work your way up to ERP as he continues to heal/overcome w/d.  There is hope.  This is huge but -take a look at his diet, sleeping patterns, nutritional/vitamin deficiencies (B's?) and also (for me this worked) possibly homeopathy or acupuncture.  Caffiiene, gluten and sugar feed OCD like you wouldn't believe. Again, this is just my life long experience with it.  So these are suggestions based on my own experience- I am not a professional-just someone who has dealt with OCD for a long time.

 

Since he did not have OCD before w/d- I guarantee you it will go away!  In my journey to heal from SSRI w/d I actually was able to heal my OCD as well!  I now do not get bouts all that often anymore- like maybe briefly here and there for a day or so every few months.  But it's all so mild-I barely notice it.  And it's pure O.  This too shall pass.  When you're in the throws of it- you cannot see a way out- but you will.  Or better yet, he will.  Time and patience.

 

All the best <3

Penny

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Distraut   
Distraut

Penny you are a darling!

 

Thank you again - great to hear (and for him too, if he will listen.  I am only his Mum after all :huh:. What on earth do I know?)

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Pennylane34   
Pennylane34

Penny you are a darling!

 

Thank you again - great to hear (and for him too, if he will listen.  I am only his Mum after all :huh:. What on earth do I know?)

Anytime, it is my pleasure to help anyone in need.  I have been there and I remember the hell I went through.  It helps to have people who relate.

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kara100   
kara100

Hi Pennylane, I hope you are doing well now from going through this very difficult ordeal in your life time. I want to know if you have had symptoms of insomnia and waking up with heart palpitations during withdrawal. And if so? Do you think you got recovered from that. I AM asking because these two symptoms are my worst symptoms in withdrawal. Thank you for reading this and I hope that you will recover from food and environmental sensitivities  and can enjoy life like never before. 

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Hellbutrin   
Hellbutrin
On 4/13/2017 at 7:09 PM, Pennylane34 said:

Oh absolutely. I was WAY worse off physically in the beginning. I'm actually a 100% functional human being now. Most days I forget that I even am still somewhat 'off' physically. Like my symptoms aren't the main focal point of my life anymore. Over time my body has healed/adapted/created new neural pathways-where I can do just about anything a regular, 'healthy' person can do. I have had setbacks over the years-but overall-I've gotten much better. Truly the answer lies in your diet, sleep patterns and just overall time. And trying as best you can to believe that you will get better. My story is unqiue. Most people physically recover 100%-I am the exception-not the rule.

Hi Penny, 

 

Thanks so much for your post! Seeing stories like yours is SO incredibly encouraging for those of us who are still struggling through withdrawal. Can you give me an idea of how long it took for your brain fog to ease and did it completely go away?

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DMV64   
DMV64

Thank you so much for sharing this story of hope!!

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