☼ dj2010: off all meds for 3 months and been fine now bad insomnia

[powerback]

37 minutes ago, dj2010 said:

thanks PB, yes aiming to write a success story by the end of this year, if it doesn't happen then I am certain it will be next year, this was the 1st xmas drug free since I was a teenager, it was lovely and to be able to enjoy it again. Keep up them hikes buddy, they will be doing you the world of good and good on you for growing the broccoli, probably the most healthiest vegetable, nice little hobby that also, will take mind off withdrawal for a while,

 

cheers

That's a serious achievement off them ,on  them since a kid ,total kudos mate.keep up skills to never go near them again.

Ye its great watching them grow from seeds ,it germinates like water cress rather than broccoli florets .

Off for a hike now .

Take care. 

PB

 

[dj2010]

40 minutes ago, powerback said:

That's a serious achievement off them ,on  them since a kid ,total kudos mate.keep up skills to never go near them again.

Ye its great watching them grow from seeds ,it germinates like water cress rather than broccoli florets .

Off for a hike now .

Take care. 

PB

 

yeh big achievement, something that I thought was impossible a couple of years ago after a few unsuccessful tapers, might look into growing my own vegetables, can be sure no poisons on them then, cant trust anyone these days, poisons everywhere lol

 

hope you have a good hike, you sound a lot better in yourself at the moment! hope you stay well,

 

cheers

[powerback]

2 hours ago, dj2010 said:

yeh big achievement, something that I thought was impossible a couple of years ago after a few unsuccessful tapers, might look into growing my own vegetables, can be sure no poisons on them then, cant trust anyone these days, poisons everywhere lol

 

hope you have a good hike, you sound a lot better in yourself at the moment! hope you stay well,

 

cheers

grow your own is best .totally have to  myself also .

Ye not too bad thanks ,last year I wasn't keeping my stress down but this year I will have to make a serious effort to keep away from triggers ,making decisions while in withdrawl is hard ,I cant trust my gut feeling but i listened to eckart tolle for a bit today helped a bit ,but then I  said take the earphones away and enjoy the peace of the hills and it was a sunny day also ,I love the trails after loads of rain .

I need to stay away from loved ones for a while[parents ] because there anxiety about my situation is causing me stress ,I eat well and am doing everything to help myself but dealing with people that are stuck in the stone age can be very difficult, mainly my father .I even resent it .its just a phase but a very long one .my mother has been a rock but we don't agree on many things these days but that's ok  .

I had a lovely Christmas with my little niece ,the effort I put into going back and forth to the Uk since she was born seems to have paid off ,we have a lovely bond that I treasure ,reading her stories  and playing I'm a big kid so it suits .I'm welling up "who's cutting onions " .

Stay strong .

 

 

[dj2010]

14 hours ago, powerback said:

grow your own is best .totally have to  myself also .

Ye not too bad thanks ,last year I wasn't keeping my stress down but this year I will have to make a serious effort to keep away from triggers ,making decisions while in withdrawl is hard ,I cant trust my gut feeling but i listened to eckart tolle for a bit today helped a bit ,but then I  said take the earphones away and enjoy the peace of the hills and it was a sunny day also ,I love the trails after loads of rain .

I need to stay away from loved ones for a while[parents ] because there anxiety about my situation is causing me stress ,I eat well and am doing everything to help myself but dealing with people that are stuck in the stone age can be very difficult, mainly my father .I even resent it .its just a phase but a very long one .my mother has been a rock but we don't agree on many things these days but that's ok  .

I had a lovely Christmas with my little niece ,the effort I put into going back and forth to the Uk since she was born seems to have paid off ,we have a lovely bond that I treasure ,reading her stories  and playing I'm a big kid so it suits .I'm welling up "who's cutting onions " .

Stay strong .

 

 

I am glad you had a pleasant hike, it sounds like you live in a nice area, 

 

sounds like such a beautiful relationship you have with your niece, it is much easier dealing with people who have not yet been corrupted,

 

dealing with family is difficult, especially trying to explain withdrawal to them when I barely understand it all myself,

 

had a rough night last night, I read a negative article another member posted on here and it was a huge trigger, was on my mind all night, had to use a sleep aid, I imagine it would of been a horrible read for members on here who are basically hanging on by a thread, so think going to take a step back again from this site so don't come across anything else negative,

 

take care

[powerback]

3 minutes ago, dj2010 said:

I am glad you had a pleasant hike, it sounds like you live in a nice area, 

 

sounds like such a beautiful relationship you have with your niece, it is much easier dealing with people who have not yet been corrupted,

 

dealing with family is difficult, especially trying to explain withdrawal to them when I barely understand it all myself,

 

had a rough night last night, I read a negative article another member posted on here and it was a huge trigger, was on my mind all night, had to use a sleep aid, I imagine it would of been a horrible read for members on here who are basically hanging on by a thread, so think going to take a step back again from this site so don't come across anything else negative,

 

take care

Ye its terrible reading them,i have gotten much better at going no were near these articles ,we need to take a tip from the doctors and medical community and deny they even exist for now anyhow .I'm extremely fragile ,the last few months I have to be so careful what I listen to also on radio and tv .ive put up a few triggering articles myself but we got to head the warnings.

Ye theres good walking trails on my doorstep ,using the word hills is a little over the top ,but I can get away from civilisation for a few hours with traveling for a walk.as soon as I come back down I go into wrap up mode and put the earphones in and drown the world out . my problem is I can get bored of the same walks ,so I'm planning a few nice walks elsewhere.but I don't want to over do it .

I need to have a break myself but my personal life isn't very busy at the moment .

Oh I nearly forgot ,I had my broccoli sprouts for dinner ,I was surprised how strong they tasted of mustard and pepper .  

Take care DJ  and stay healing .

[dj2010]

1 hour ago, powerback said:

Ye its terrible reading them,i have gotten much better at going no were near these articles ,we need to take a tip from the doctors and medical community and deny they even exist for now anyhow .I'm extremely fragile ,the last few months I have to be so careful what I listen to also on radio and tv .ive put up a few triggering articles myself but we got to head the warnings.

Ye theres good walking trails on my doorstep ,using the word hills is a little over the top ,but I can get away from civilisation for a few hours with traveling for a walk.as soon as I come back down I go into wrap up mode and put the earphones in and drown the world out . my problem is I can get bored of the same walks ,so I'm planning a few nice walks elsewhere.but I don't want to over do it .

I need to have a break myself but my personal life isn't very busy at the moment .

Oh I nearly forgot ,I had my broccoli sprouts for dinner ,I was surprised how strong they tasted of mustard and pepper .  

Take care DJ  and stay healing .

yeh going to avoid them at all costs now, my main fear at the moment is that maybe there is more delayed withdrawal to hit me, although not really read about delayed withdrawal at 9 - 10 months out, dont think my body and mind would be able to cope with much more as been through too much over the last 10 years with the venlafaxine cold turkey and the all the failed tapers, defo need a break from it all now,

 

keep up them walks they are lifesavers, try getting them in daily if you can, wish there was some hills that close to me,

 

bet eating your broccoli sprouts was satisfying knowing you have grown them yourself, need to keep up as many hobbies like this as possible,

 

going to put work to one side today and go for a swim shortly, hopefully there will be some women there to oggle over 

 

take care buddy

[powerback]

4 hours ago, dj2010 said:

yeh going to avoid them at all costs now, my main fear at the moment is that maybe there is more delayed withdrawal to hit me, although not really read about delayed withdrawal at 9 - 10 months out, dont think my body and mind would be able to cope with much more as been through too much over the last 10 years with the venlafaxine cold turkey and the all the failed tapers, defo need a break from it all now,

 

keep up them walks they are lifesavers, try getting them in daily if you can, wish there was some hills that close to me,

 

bet eating your broccoli sprouts was satisfying knowing you have grown them yourself, need to keep up as many hobbies like this as possible,

 

going to put work to one side today and go for a swim shortly, hopefully there will be some women there to oggle over 

 

take care buddy

Enjoy your swim .maybe keep a few notes down on paper about how you got through it before ,like writing your own affirmations in away .you can draw on this if it hits you again ,hopefully not .enjoy your ogle .

respect . 

[dj2010]

quick update:

 

this morning was my first session back at the gym, not been able to go for the last 6 months because of withdrawal, didn't do anything too intense, just 20 minutes of uphill walking on the treadmill and a full body workout using light weights, it felt great, its amazing how much it boosts your mood, also feels like another victory, slowly taking my life back piece by piece...

[powerback]

Great stuff Dj ,dont push it to hard and keep an eye on your limits .get the proper nutrition into ye also to repare after the work out .

Keep it up .

[dj2010]

thanks PB, yes going to ease back in slowly and see how it effects my sleep and keeping up the proper nutrition,

 

take care

[dj2010]

quite a bad week this week, going to the gym on Wednesday was a big mistake, caused a extremely bad nights sleep where was waking every hour and only got 5 hours very broken sleep, obviously not ready for lifting weights yet, it seems anything i do that causes lots of activity in the brain makes sleep really bad, even if do things in the morning

 

ive got a very sore knee from swimming, googled it and have got swimmers knee, its in the same place that I injured my knee around 5 years ago, so cant go gym and cant swim and cant run now, back to just walking,

 

Last night was another really bad nights sleep, only got 4 hours, I am trying to establish a new sleeping routine where I dont watch any tv and avoid any light for at least a hour before sleep, usually i fall asleep watching tv, i think because I broke my usual routine it made sleep bad, anyway going to try the new routine again tonight and see what happens,

 

going for long walk today as soon as rain stops

[powerback]

I feel your pain DJ, I woke up this morning the worst ive felt for a while ,massive headache and the spoon scraping off the bowl when eating brekki is horrible ,noise sensitivity very bad [note to self "plastic kitchen ware ].trying some acceptance and riding it out ,hopefully the day gets better for us both ,raining here also .

Don't give up on all your activities,youve tested the water [no pun intended ] and at least you know were you stand for now [theres another one  ],it really is a nightmare.

I hope so much for you that you get your sleep sorted . 

respect .

[dj2010]

38 minutes ago, powerback said:

I feel your pain DJ, I woke up this morning the worst ive felt for a while ,massive headache and the spoon scraping off the bowl when eating brekki is horrible ,noise sensitivity very bad [note to self "plastic kitchen ware ].trying some acceptance and riding it out ,hopefully the day gets better for us both ,raining here also .

Don't give up on all your activities,youve tested the water [no pun intended ] and at least you know were you stand for now [theres another one  ],it really is a nightmare.

I hope so much for you that you get your sleep sorted . 

respect .

thanks PB, sorry to hear you are suffering too today, lol yeh know what can and cant do for now, just booked a yoga session at my gym for Thursday going to try that as never tried yoga before, not sure if will back out or not when get there as it will be a class of 30 women and just me, need to get my wife a gym membership sorted soon so she can join me, wont be too bad then,

 

hope your day improves, take care

[powerback]

Yoga is a good one ,just got finished listening to MIAs podcast no29 ,Keli Foulkrod ,"integrating yoga with psychotherapy " is what she talks about ,well worth a listen .I have to look into this myself and Pilates for strength ,I have a weakness in my shoulders for a while that I'm not happy about ,there must be members that can advise us on yoga/Pilates .

 

I cant book anything because I cant predict when my symptoms are bad so I think ile just YouTube it for now  but getting out is a lot nicer  that's for sure .good luck with it .

Take care my friend . 

[dj2010]

34 minutes ago, powerback said:

Yoga is a good one ,just got finished listening to MIAs podcast no29 ,Keli Foulkrod ,"integrating yoga with psychotherapy " is what she talks about ,well worth a listen .I have to look into this myself and Pilates for strength ,I have a weakness in my shoulders for a while that I'm not happy about ,there must be members that can advise us on yoga/Pilates .

 

I cant book anything because I cant predict when my symptoms are bad so I think ile just YouTube it for now  but getting out is a lot nicer  that's for sure .good luck with it .

Take care my friend . 

sounds good, going to have to get into them podcasts, could try doing yoga and pilates at home, just figuring out how to do it all, cheers

[powerback]

50 minutes ago, dj2010 said:

sounds good, going to have to get into them podcasts, could try doing yoga and pilates at home, just figuring out how to do it all, cheers

I recommend the podcast big time ,they fill me with confidence there's people out there making a difference ,there are times we need to be careful about triggers and maybe not listen but its mostly positive and reassuring for change ,I'm keeping a list of all the great people and what services they provide ,it must be in our toolbox for healing ,I also listen to  peter breggins one also . 

Peace to you DJ

[Sertramean]

Keep going DJ, I found a lot of improvements during my 2nd year of the drugs. I started lifting weights again after about 14 months off as I recall.

 

All the best.

[dj2010]

16 hours ago, powerback said:

I recommend the podcast big time ,they fill me with confidence there's people out there making a difference ,there are times we need to be careful about triggers and maybe not listen but its mostly positive and reassuring for change ,I'm keeping a list of all the great people and what services they provide ,it must be in our toolbox for healing ,I also listen to  peter breggins one also . 

Peace to you DJ

sounds interesting PB, its food that there are people trying to get the word out, the more the better, eventually the truth will come out, yes defo need to avoid hearing anything that triggers at the moment, hope you are well today, got 8 hours sleep last night so feeling good today 

 

take care

[dj2010]

6 hours ago, Sertramean said:

Keep going DJ, I found a lot of improvements during my 2nd year of the drugs. I started lifting weights again after about 14 months off as I recall.

 

All the best.

thanks a lot for the encouragement Sertramean it means a lot! I see you was also medicated for a very long so this gives great hope to us all, its still early days for me so I am excited for what the future brings, I felt so alive after that gym session and cant wait until I can do it every day,

 

take care

[AliG]

On 1/20/2018 at 8:12 PM, dj2010 said:

going to the gym on Wednesday was a big mistake, caused a extremely bad nights sleep where was waking every hour and only got 5 hours very broken sleep, obviously not ready for lifting weights yet, it seems anything i do that causes lots of activity in the brain makes sleep really bad, even if do things in the morning

 

Hi D : good to see you doing better but please be careful of the gym : it's a huge trigger ~

 

Much better to do Yoga~  once you're through this, then you can go for it but at this point ~ it's still too early.

[dj2010]

7 minutes ago, AliG said:

 

Hi D : good to see you doing better but please be careful of the gym : it's a huge trigger ~

 

Much better to do Yoga~  once you're through this, then you can go for it but at this point ~ it's still too early.

 

Hi Ali, no wont be trying gym again anytime soon, got a yoga class booked for Thursday, learning all the time what can and cant do, thanks for your advice

[AliG]

I'm so glad to see that you're doing well ~ awesome. Please be careful though as there are so many things at this stage that can bring you, undone.

 

For me , it was mainly exercise, stress, sugar, lack of sleep and toxic people. For some it's medications - OTC. ( over the counter) and anti-biotics as well as other medical tests.

[dj2010]

26 minutes ago, AliG said:

I'm so glad to see that you're doing well ~ awesome. Please be careful though as there are so many things at this stage that can bring you, undone.

 

For me , it was mainly exercise, stress, sugar, lack of sleep and toxic people. For some it's medications - OTC. ( over the counter) and anti-biotics as well as other medical tests.

yes going to be super careful from now on, I keep getting over confident and trying new things, will just stick to what I know can do, thanks of the tips on what to look out for,

 

take care

[powerback]

On ‎21‎/‎01‎/‎2018 at 8:02 AM, dj2010 said:

sounds interesting PB, its food that there are people trying to get the word out, the more the better, eventually the truth will come out, yes defo need to avoid hearing anything that triggers at the moment, hope you are well today, got 8 hours sleep last night so feeling good today 

 

take care

IM delighted for you ,you got the 8 hours ,brilliant DJ .

I hope many more are coming . 

[dj2010]

just had my 1st yoga class, it went well, as I expected I was the only guy there, walked in the class and everyone looked at me like I was some sort of intruder, got my mat and went to the back of the class in the corner out of the way,

 

was a lot more difficult than I expected but managed to pull off a shoulder stand which quite proud of, i am sure the more i go the more relaxing it will be as going to take some time for my muscles to get used to it, hopefully it will not have any negative impact on my sleep, quite looking forward to the next class

[powerback]

Great DJ good on ye ,is there music or do ye just copy the instructor ,how long does it go on .

Take care .

[dj2010]

12 hours ago, powerback said:

Great DJ good on ye ,is there music or do ye just copy the instructor ,how long does it go on .

Take care .

hi PB, yes there is relaxation music in background and have to copy the instructor, its for 1 hour so quite long, got another session this afternoon,

 

hope your well, take care

[powerback]

Hows the yoga going DJ .

I hope your well .

[dj2010]

9 minutes ago, powerback said:

Hows the yoga going DJ .

I hope your well .

hi PB, had to cancel yesterdays class as ive not been good, been in a wave for around a week, insomnia been relentless on a couple nights, had to take diazepam other night, tinnitus came back strong also, last night slept good and feel fine today and tinnitus has gone thank god, going on a long walk now and got yoga class at 1pm, hope you have a nice trip, try not to let anything trigger you, thanks a lot for checking on me, take care

[powerback]

5 hours ago, dj2010 said:

hi PB, had to cancel yesterdays class as ive not been good, been in a wave for around a week, insomnia been relentless on a couple nights, had to take diazepam other night, tinnitus came back strong also, last night slept good and feel fine today and tinnitus has gone thank god, going on a long walk now and got yoga class at 1pm, hope you have a nice trip, try not to let anything trigger you, thanks a lot for checking on me, take care

your welcome DJ, today I have a little reprieve myself ,its been quite the week .I'm packing here and have to be mindful of not getting  over excited .

I have a good pair of noise cancelling earphones for the airport but ile also only go near the boarding gate at the very end because I hate that loud speaker calling people for flights .only going to the UK so only hand luggage needed.

Ile enjoy the trip thanks .

I hope you get your insomnia sorted some day ,its such a pain for you .

Be safe .

 

  

[dj2010]

Not good today been in and out of waves last few weeks, been awake since 2am again, tinnitus really bad all night, started getting bit panicky during night, today got extreme head pressure around the sides and not eaten yet, feeling very weak but forced myself to go on a 1 hour walk although it was more like a slow shuffle, good job my wife is here now to look after the kids as my mother on holiday, was hoping would be no more waves as was in a window for nearly 2 months, looking forward to getting back into a proper window, going to spend rest of day on sofa resting and watching netflix, this whole process is brutal

[powerback]

2 hours ago, dj2010 said:

Not good today been in and out of waves last few weeks, been awake since 2am again, tinnitus really bad all night, started getting bit panicky during night, today got extreme head pressure around the sides and not eaten yet, feeling very weak but forced myself to go on a 1 hour walk although it was more like a slow shuffle, good job my wife is here now to look after the kids as my mother on holiday, was hoping would be no more waves as was in a window for nearly 2 months, looking forward to getting back into a proper window, going to spend rest of day on sofa resting and watching netflix, this whole process is brutal

Thats great your wife there now DJ ,just back from a walk meself ,no energy but got some sun.its good your not going to fight it and watch some Netflix .

I must unpack meslf lol.

Take care and hold out untill the next prolonged window .

[dj2010]

16 hours ago, powerback said:

Thats great your wife there now DJ ,just back from a walk meself ,no energy but got some sun.its good your not going to fight it and watch some Netflix .

I must unpack meslf lol.

Take care and hold out untill the next prolonged window .

thanks for your support PB, another bad night though, woke after couple of hours had a huge nightmare, woke in panic and surge of anxiety, turned fan on full blast to cool me down and calmed after a couple hours, managed to get back to sleep though for another 4 hours so not too bad in end, still not feeling good and weak, can remember every part of the nightmare, hope your keeping well

[powerback]

1 hour ago, dj2010 said:

thanks for your support PB, another bad night though, woke after couple of hours had a huge nightmare, woke in panic and surge of anxiety, turned fan on full blast to cool me down and calmed after a couple hours, managed to get back to sleep though for another 4 hours so not too bad in end, still not feeling good and weak, can remember every part of the nightmare, hope your keeping well

70% mostly waves for a while ,body constantly fighting off colds so that's what must have my constant intrusive/racing/thoughts .

We just keep fighting DJ but its tough at times .

Peace my friend

[dj2010]

28 minutes ago, powerback said:

70% mostly waves for a while ,body constantly fighting off colds so that's what must have my constant intrusive/racing/thoughts .

We just keep fighting DJ but its tough at times .

Peace my friend

not long now until out of the cold and flu season, it will be a relief for us all, take good care

[Miracle123]

Hi Dj2010, From your previous stories i have read and found out you are really super tough to get off so many drugs...i now also faced several sleeping disturbed,  insomnia and walking up so many times late night without getting back to sleep....my sleeping pattern almost like you wakes 3 to 4 times per night and struggling back to sleep....sometimes even every hour so suffer. I not easy to get melatonin cos my country ban it but lucky i can get from my sister , she stay at Australia.I hope u will getting more improvement better from waves and  more windows in future. Glad to hear that you almost back to normal good sleeping without any sleeping aids.

I still  in horrible withdrawal stage....would like to know how long you take the tumeric supplement. ...its a capsule or powder? Have any side effect if take for longer period.....i quite interested of having one if possible .....im a female.....im suitable to take it?

Thanks and take care.