Amy238: dealing with gasping/choking Zoloft withdrawal symptoms

[Amy238]

First off, thank you @Altostrata for creating this forum. What I have read here so far resonates with me more than anything I have come across so far. I live in San Francisco, have been on anti-depressants for over 4-5 years now. At the time I started taking zoloft, I didn't understand anything about it, I knew I was sad, depressed primarily because I lived alone away from family, and had moved to San Francisco for work. Being a female, in my mid-thirties and struggling to come to terms with why life didn't turn out to be the fairy-tale they told me about when I was younger. I saw these therapists who were older in their late 50s or 60s and I assumed that the consultation I would receive would be in my best interest and from an experienced source. Looking back on it now, I realize how at no point they saw me in the light of anything other than a source of money. I am still trying to come to terms with what makes these doctors so un-sympathetic, greedy and remorseless.
I was put on zoloft(100 mg) and temzepam in the year 2011.

I started seeing a new therapist in october 2015 after an episode of some stress in personal life. I changed therapist because of convenience of location, need for a fresh start
and convenience of easy refills. He gave me zoloft , wellbutrin for depression and Temazepam for sleep. Very soon, he claimed that due to me being in extreme distress, I should never be off of these meds. Last year, he decided he would put me on Seroquel 50 mg for sleep instead of temazepam as it’s more effective. Seroquel would knock me out every night for good 10 hours. I started showing up late for work regularly. During every single visit he insisted I had bad anxiety issues and severest kind of depression even though I would always respond with I do not believe I have anxiety at all. I work in a high stress work environment and I absolutely enjoy it. By September 2016 my life had improved in all possible ways, a loving, loyal, caring boy-friend and a highly respectable, well-paying job. I asked my therapist to help me get off all the med. He absolutely disliked the idea and stopped giving me any appointments but steady, consistent refills for all med. I didn’t make any change to Seroquel but I stopped taking Wellbutrin after consulting another physician. I had no withdrawal symptoms except when I forgot to take zoloft 3 days in a row, I had a major panic attack, heart rates going upto 193 bpm. That was my first introduction to panic attacks. I started to reduce the dose for zoloft from 150 mg to 100 mg to 50 mg to 25 mg slowly over next few months, starting in Oct 2016.
By May 2017, I was taking 25 mg every day. Then I changed the frequency to 25 mg every other day and then every 2 days by September of 2107. I was cutting my 100 mg pill in 4 parts to get a 25 mg because doctor wouldn’t change my prescription from 100 mg which I was supposed to take 1.5 tablets every day. during this time, my periods became irregular and I thought I was having early menopause, turns out it’s a withdrawal symptom.

 

I stopped taking zoloft completely on 27th september 2017. A physician (who saw me when my therapist couldn’t keep his appointments with me and worked at the same medical facility as my therapist), recommended this to me in May 2017
 “continue with sertraline 50 daily until stable for 2-4 weeks, then if desired, may take 25 mg daily (1/2 tablet) and once stable with this dose for 2-4 weeks and then may stop if desired”
I barely understood what withdrawal symptoms feel like and didn’t expect any since in my mind I tapered off slowly enough going by what I was told by the physician above.

After stopping zoloft,

1st week  -   No symptoms
2nd week, -  Heart racing, choking, gasping while sleeping (I was still on Seroquel 50 mg for sleep). I still didn’t understand these were withdrawal symptoms.

                     I thought may be it’s the dry air, may it’s my pillow. I bought a new humidifier and a new pillow.
3rd week -  Panic attacks, heart racing, choking, gasping bad to the point that I went without sleep for days out of fear that I will close my eyes and choke.

                    I thought I had developed sleep apnea, still didn’t realize fully it had anything to with zoloft withdrawal. Scheduled a sleep study.
4th week - Lack of sleep, panic attacks made me physically weak, I was talking and walking like a zombie, stooping and talking slow.

                   Made an emergency appointment with a doctor, she suggested sleep study.

                   Checked my thyroid by drawling blood, again I had no idea what thyroid meant but my levels were found to be highly elevated.
5th week - Panic attacks, called nurse at 5 am out of sheer panic that I was dying of suffocation. Finally got an appointment with the therapist.

                   He said I had anxiety disorders, I should never be off of zoloft, I likely need to be on it my entire life and if I insisted on tapering off of it, he would have nothing to do with me then onwards.

                   I should go find myself some other therapist.
6th week - Current, I have been looking for help online.

My body feels listless, I have been sleeping for < 4 hours every night. 

 

Please HELP, please ADVISE. I need help.

 

My main symptom is feeling as if throat muscles have swollen from inside, blocking my airway and I keep waking up with a gasp and shortness of breath which is followed by a panic attack, as I feel I can’t breathe and probably am going to die. It’s been 39 days since I stopped. I am barely functional. I did take Ativan for about a week and it helped relieve gasping symptoms and I did manage to get some sleep. But now, I am out of it, and doctor wouldn't refill as it's not advised for long term use. Should I get back on zoloft for some time ? If yes, what should be my dose ?
Is there a doctor in SF who can help me with withdrawal and eventual tapering off ?

 

 

 

[AliG]

Hi Amy. Welcome to SA ( Surviving Antidepressants). I'm sorry for what you have been through but glad you found us and shared your story. It's not right that doctors medicate us for stressful life events that make us sad/ depressed or lonely. This is just a normal part of life and we really don't need to be drugged to get through it. There are many other more positive ways of dealing with these life stressors.

 

It sounds like most of your symptoms are from withdrawal and your sleep problems are most likely a part of that with the accompanying panic etc. Panic is a common symptom in withdrawal due to the high levels of cortisol that can occur leading to fight/ flight, anxiety etc. Your nervous system is currently in a state of chaos due to all the changes it has been through recently.

 

We ask all our members to fill in their signature with their drug and tapering history. Please follow the directions at the link below : This appears below each of your posts and enables us to see your situation at a glance.

Please put your withdrawal history in your signature

 

From my understanding, you have been off Zoloft for approximately 5 weeks and you stopped at a dose of 25mg. Is that correct?

If that is the case, then a very small reinstatement of Zoloft could help to ease the withdrawal symptoms and make this more manageable for you, going forward.

About reinstating and stabilizing to reduce withdrawal symptoms

 

 

I'm going to post some links which are relevant for you. You can read through them and then come back with any questions. I'm sure there will be many, as this is just an introductory post to help get you acquainted with us and also for us to get to know your history.

 

 

What is withdrawal syndrome?

 

The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

Dr. Joseph Glenmullen's withdrawal symptom checklist

 

These will also help you to understand what is happening:

Healing from antidepressants. Patterns of recovery/

 

Brain Remodelling

 

Please read the reinstatement link above: Let us know your thoughts on reinstating a very small dose of Zoloft. If you do decide to go that route, we can give you a possible starting dose.

 

Again, welcome. This is your thread to journal progress and ask questions. You will find lots of friendly help and support here.

Ali

Edited November 9, 2017 by AliG

[apace41]

I want to echo Ali's welcome to the site, Amy.  She has given you excellent advice to start and get you "up and running" here on SA.  I also want to tell you how sorry I am that you, like so many here on SA, have been damaged and wronged by the psychiatric system.  It is truly a travesty how little these "doctors" know about the life-altering substances they hand out as if they were Pez from a dispenser.

 

In any event, the best news for you is that our fearless leader, Altostrata, hails from the same burg as you -- SF -- and will likely have some good thoughts on therapists who will be able to provide you with a far more positive relationship than those that you have had.  I know she is away for several days but imagine that once she is back she will be in a position to provide you with some thoughts.

 

Hang in there, relax to the extent you can, you are in the right place.

 

Best,

 

Andy

[Altostrata]

Welcome, Amy.

 

Quote

I had no withdrawal symptoms except when I forgot to take zoloft 3 days in a row, I had a major panic attack, heart rates going upto 193 bpm.

 

That was no panic attack, that was a strong hit of withdrawal.

 

You now have a pretty solid case of withdrawal syndrome, possibly from Seroquel on top of Zoloft.

 

You've been taking trazodone only a couple of weeks? Does it help at all?

 

Do you have any Seroquel left?

 

 

[Amy238]

Thank you so AliG, aspace41 and Altostrata for your respones. I feel so supported. Thank you for making world a better place to live in. I already feel I will survive this and come out of it soon. I have been reading everything you guys have shared with me. I have started to document and watch my symptoms closely now. If I understood the science behind the symptoms, may be I could do something to help minimize them. Though more and more I am feeling I might have to re-instate zoloft in a smaller dose.

 

@Altostrata, I have been taking half of 'trazodone - 50 mg' for 7 days now. It does make me plenty sleepy. I do have Seroquel left as well. I have zoloft too(100 mg).
Only reason I stopped taking Seroquel was because it was highly sedating and I was afraid to fall in deep sleep, thinking I might choke during sleep and die, and wouldn't be able to even wake myself up to save myself. I don't know if these are irrational fears but I am constantly waking up, gasping for breath, heart racing, arms numb.

I feel like I have more gasping episodes when I am on my back though, so now I try to sleep only on my side. I am doing a sleep study tonight as well.

 

I read this somewhere,  "Avoid alcohol, sleeping pills, and sedatives, especially before bedtime, because they relax the muscles in the throat and interfere with breathing." and to me it felt like tightness in my throat was causing breathing troubles. But now I am not so sure.

 

Should I take Trazodone 50 mg, 1 pill instead of half ? I mean I must have woken up 20-30 times last night, sweating yet shivering, heart racing but I didn't die. My my upper chest feels sore(may be because of labored breathing through the night) and can't taste food, have been loosing weight but nothing too bad. 

 

I have noticed one significant change in last 3-4 days though, day time choking and panic attacks are almost gone.

Should I give Trazodone some more time or re-instate zoloft now ?

 

Thank you for all your advice again.

 

[Amy238]

Someone suggested that now I was having what they call "Nocturnal Panic Attacks". May be they are right :-(

[Amy238]

I found this https://moodsmith.com/nocturnal-panic-attacks-night/

The symptoms described in here match mine. I just woke up an hour ago after having series of these sweaty, choking, heart racing episodes. 

Can’t go back to sleep now, had 25 mg of Trazodone and I am very sleepy but forcing myself to stay awake. Feels like the moment I would close my eyes, these would start again.

 

If the explanation in this article is correct than if I produce enough serotonin during the day, I may not have these episodes. Also if I meditate may be I can train my brain to understand that slower heart rates are ok. These are all assumptions on my part, it would be so great if they can be confirmed. I do know from my heart rate graphs(Apple watch) over the last 1 year, while on Zoloft my average heart rate used to be in range 100-110 bpm. Since being off of Zoloft, average is 70-85 bpm. May be that’s the part central nervous system is confused about “the change in heart rates” since being off of Zoloft and giving me panic attacks. Since resting heart rates at night can go lower, likely my body has adjusted to the change during the day but still adapting to the changes at night time.

 

I was planning on going back on low dose of Zoloft starting tomorrow. But I so don’t want to. If meditation and exercise can work as effectively albeit a bit slower I would rather want to try that. But then question becomes, how much slower, would the difference be in terms of days or months. I have been skipping work, ideally wouldn’t want to suffer through this for months but if it would be matter of weeks, may be I should give that a shot.

 

Can someone please give me some advice ?

 

 

 

[apace41]

Hi, Amy,
 

6 hours ago, Amy238 said:

I found this https://moodsmith.com/nocturnal-panic-attacks-night/

 

I think Elaine Ryan's stuff is really great.  I bought her program on Health Anxiety since I've dealt with that as a consequence of withdrawal.  I think her theory on all of this is quite sound.

 

6 hours ago, Amy238 said:

The symptoms described in here match mine. I just woke up an hour ago after having series of these sweaty, choking, heart racing episodes. 

Can’t go back to sleep now, had 25 mg of Trazodone and I am very sleepy but forcing myself to stay awake. Feels like the moment I would close my eyes, these would start again.

 

These are very common symptoms for a lot of people going through withdrawal.  First of all, you should know that you are not alone in this.

 

6 hours ago, Amy238 said:

If the explanation in this article is correct than if I produce enough serotonin during the day, I may not have these episodes. Also if I meditate may be I can train my brain to understand that slower heart rates are ok. These are all assumptions on my part, it would be so great if they can be confirmed.

 

These are all reasonable assumptions but it is hard to know whether or not they work in all situations and for all people.  We are not just "the average case."  It is more individualized.  I think that meditation and other self-soothing techniques are critical to your journey but the changes they make in the brain tend to happen far more slowly and there is no way to be sure that you won't suffer in your withdrawal prior to the time these changes have effect (assuming they do).  Hence, we would recommend a very small reinstatement as the most likely way to stop the withdrawal symptoms that are hitting you at this point.  It doesn't always work but it has a reasonably high success rate.  While we understand that nobody wants to "go back on the poison", since the course of withdrawal can be so unpredictable, and the window for reinstatement is not open perpetually, discretion is very often the better part of valor as the saying goes.  It is, of course, not our position at SA to tell you what to do -- only to provide you with the options to allow you to make your own choice.

 

6 hours ago, Amy238 said:

I was planning on going back on low dose of Zoloft starting tomorrow. But I so don’t want to. If meditation and exercise can work as effectively albeit a bit slower I would rather want to try that. But then question becomes, how much slower, would the difference be in terms of days or months. I have been skipping work, ideally wouldn’t want to suffer through this for months but if it would be matter of weeks, may be I should give that a shot.

 

See the above response which addresses this as well.  I think exercise and meditation are both fantastic and can provide you with a lot of benefit.  I can't tell you that they will stop your withdrawal symptoms in the short term.  Hence, I would be a fan of your going through with a very small reinstatement as that might serve to stop much if not all of the distress.  Yes, you would then still have to taper off but you would be doing so from a position of strength.

 

Best,

 

Andy

[Amy238]

Hi Andy,

 

I couldn’t have hoped for a better response. I am grateful and thank you for that.

I feel convinced that it might be best to reinstate a small amount. I know that would also mean I with walking down the road with Zoloft for some more time, and I have been resisting but I feel weak after days of sleep deprivation and food deprivation.

 

I held myself back from taking it today and thought will spend the entire day meditating and exercising. It’s  laughable but I actually thought a day of exercising and meditation will help with symptoms tonight. It might somewhat but likely wouldn’t ease or stop the discomfort during night enough.

 

I will try a small dose today. Thank you again.

[ChessieCat]

1 hour ago, Amy238 said:

 

I will try a small dose today

 

What dose are you planning on taking?  Have you read Post #1 of the reinstatement topic?  These drugs are strong and It is better to start with a small dose and increase by very small amounts if needed than to start with too high a dose.

[apace41]

10 minutes ago, ChessieCat said:

These drugs are strong and It is better to start with a small dose and increase by very small amounts if needed than to start with too high a dose.

 

Thanks for jumping in, CC.  You beat me to it (as you often do)!  Amy, we recommend starting at 1-2mg and titrating up if necessary.  The goal is to stabilize on the smallest dose possible.

 

Best,

 

Andy

[Altostrata]

Amy, does trazodone consistently have that effect on you -- you get drowsy but can't sleep?

 

If so, the dose is either too high for you or the drug is not for you. Please check potential interactions of Zoloft and trazodone.

 

You may wish to discontinue trazodone if you've been taking it only a short time and it's not actually helping you sleep.

 

Please stop thinking of what's going on as panic attacks. You're experiencing withdrawal and adverse effects from drugs. This is very different from a psychological condition.

[Amy238]

CC,  When I stopped taking zoloft 6 weeks ago on 27th Sep I was taking 25 mg every 2 days(splitting 100 mg in 4).

3 days ago I did see a general physician, so that she could prescribe me a lower dose of zoloft, all I had from previous therapist was100mg pills. Now I do have 25 mg pills. She suggested I take 12.5 mg every day but then again just like a typical doctor she also said 25 mg was a very low dose and I shouldn't have any symptoms, and that I might have anxiety issues(sigh). I just ignored what she said, I needed to get a lower dose of zoloft and now I have it.

 

I was so desperate to feel better today that I took 12.5 mg. Pill is tiny, though if I try I might be able to split it in 4.

I just read the "reinstating" post and now I am worried if should have taken a smaller dose.

I see Andy suggesting 1-2 mg and then going up, and then stabilizing me on smallest possible dose. Makes sense but is it too late ? Where can I buy liquid dose so that I can go lower ? I think  I should read the post CC referred for more details.

 

Altostrata, trazodone makes me plenty sleepy and I fall asleep quickly after taking it. But after like an hour, I wake up with this gasping/choking feeling, heart racing. I could fall back asleep right away but due to fear I force myself to stay awake for next hour or two. I have noticed as soon as I fall asleep sometimes within 30 min, sometimes within an hour, I get a gasping episode and then since I am so sleepy I reassure myself it's ok, adjust pillows, fall asleep again but then within minutes get another gasping episode. If I stay awake, I am fine. Does that make sense ? Not sure if I am describing it right.

This physician I saw 3 days ago thinks it's ok for me to take trazodone with zoloft.

I know you believe these are not panic attacks but the symptoms are so similar to how they describe a panic attack.

[ChessieCat]

This might be what you are trying to describe:  waking-with-panic-or-anxiety-managing-cortisol-spikes

 

14 minutes ago, Amy238 said:

I was so desperate to feel better today that I took 12.5 mg. Pill is tiny, though if I try I might be able to split it in 4.

I just read the "reinstating" post and now I am worried if should have taken a smaller dose.

I see Andy suggesting 1-2 mg and then going up, and then stabilizing me on smallest possible dose. Makes sense but is it too late ? Where can I buy liquid dose so that I can go lower ?

 

You can make a liquid from your tablets (see below).  Yes, it is generally okay to go to a lower dose this soon after reinstating.  Please keep daily notes on paper.

 

On 14/11/2011 at 11:18 AM, Altostrata said:

Make your own liquid
Many people make their own Zoloft liquid out of tablets and water. See How to make a liquid from tablets or capsules

 

[Amy238]

Now coming to think of it @Altostrata, I was having these symptoms  when I was on Seroquel but may be since I started Trazodone they have gotten worse but I am not sure. First week I was taking < 2/3 of Trazodone 50 mg. Last 2 days I started taking 1/2 tab after the physician told me to take at-least 1/2. And I have been sweating like crazy last 2 days. Earlier I wouldn't sweat at all, just dry mouth and dry nose and gasping.

 

I need to start documenting everything on paper, starting now.

 

I am saddened and shocked at the apathy these doctors exhibit towards their patients.

[Amy238]

I took 12.5 mg today. Should I go down to 5 mg tomorrow ? Or even lower ? Can someone advice please ? I will buy an oral syringe tomorrow.

[AliG]

Hi Amy. We would have advised reinstating at a low dose of 1mg and then keeping track of your symptoms over the next few weeks with daily notes. As you have only taken one dose, it should be fine to go down to 1 mg daily. These drugs are strong and by starting low there is less risk to your already sensitive nervous system. As previously mentioned, you can always titrate up a little, if needed, once we get an idea of how you are handling this small dose.

 

The feeling of panic you're experiencing could be from cortisol spikes which are quite common in withdrawal. There is a discussion about the topic here : Waking with panic or anxiety -- managing cortisol spikes

 

Edited April 5, 2019 by Altostrata
fixed link

[Amy238]

Thank you AliG. I will go down to 1mg tomorrow.

 

It's crazy but I can't figure out what to take for sleep tonight. I am just hoping for a good night's sleep once in every 3-4 days and I can survive it. Last 3 nights have been bad.

On Altostrata's suggestion looked up Zoloft and Trazodone interaction, though many people seem to be on a combination of the two, I also found this,

https://www.drugs.com/drug-interactions/trazodone-with-zoloft-2228-0-2057-1348.html

 

I have some Seroquel remaining, may be I should take that instead of Trazodone.

[Amy238]

I agree Altostrata, the trigger to these symptoms is not psychological because I am fast asleep. Then they might be cortisol spike but I usually have them within 1 to 2 hour of falling asleep, and I continue to have them throughout the night as long as I am asleep.

 

1. Friday night- Sat morn - Slept at 2 am, and sat upright on bed at 4 am after having 3-4 of these episodes, didn't go back to sleep until 6:30 am. Slept from 6:30 until 9:30 am, constantly waking up heart-racing, sweating around my head and neck.

2. Thurs night- Fri morning - Slept at 12 midnight, woke up at 2 am(again after 4-5 episodes), didn't go back to sleep until 6 am. Slept for 6 am until 9:30 am, again kept waking up sweaty, heart-racing, will check the clock and try go back to sleep.

3. Night before above, slept at 10:30 pm, was feeling extremely wiped out, woke up at 12:20 am with a gasping episode, forced myself to stay awake entire night until 7:30 am. Slept for couple of hours until 9:30 am. Saw the physician the same day, and you guys responded to me as well. Up until this night I was not sleeping out of fear that I will choke to death in sleep. But then doctor reassured that it wouldn't happen, you guys explained to me what was going on and so next 2 nights #2 and #1 I forced myself to keep going back to sleep. So even though slept for more hours through the night, it was very restless.

 

I will take Seroquel instead of Trazodone tonight.

[Amy238]

Took 12.5 mg zoloft and 25 mg Seroquel last night. Slept at 12:45 am, woke up at 2 am, felt like heart stopped beating several times. Was very groggy and panic-striken, left voice mail for nurse, she called back at 2:45 am and stayed on phone for 30 minutes, was talking slow and slurry. At 4 am, tried to go back to sleep - until 7:30 am. Kept waking up feeling like heart stopping, and cold would wash over me, followed by a gasp and I would renew breathing. Kept happening the entire time I was asleep :-(

 

Still feel the heart thumping. Cold washing over my belly still. Mouth dry.

[apace41]

37 minutes ago, Amy238 said:

felt like heart stopped beating several times

 

Sorry you are struggling to stabilize, Amy.  Can you explain what this means?  Is it like a missed heartbeat where it feels like it stops and then starts again with greater force?

 

Thanks for explaining.

 

Best,

 

Andy

[Amy238]

Andy, I know I am struggling to explain my symptoms.

Basically, I fall asleep and then something wakes me up. And I find heart-racing, dry mouth. Since I am asleep, I do not really know what exactly is the trigger.

Sometimes since I take sleeping pills, I fall back asleep within few minutes of waking up, but then again am jolted awake by something.

 

Today, it happened so many times, and I wasn't in deep sleep and couple of times I remember feeling like heart stopped otherwise there is this constant thumping but for few sec, felt absolute silence, cold washed over me and again fast racing of heart.

 

Isn't it possible the withdrawl is causing irregular heart activity(chaotic pulse) and causing heart to stop, and I feel it manifest as if stopping to breathe and starting to breathe again.

I am so confused, terrified to fall asleep.  In the morning, I was still very groggy, and would drift off to sleep sitting up, with chin on my palms and then same feeling heart stopping, rush of cold and jolted out of sleepiness.

[apace41]

Amy,

 

What you are experiencing is VERY common in withdrawal.  The surges of cortisol that come out of the blue and wake you bolt upright are the product of a disregulated autonomic nervous system.  The important thing that you should know is that your heart is not actually "stopping".  You are having premature beats where the electrical impulses are out of whack and the chamber -- either atrium or ventricle -- slows in filling with blood momentarily and then has extra blood for the next beat. Hence it feels like it is stopping and then pounding.  If you Google "surviving antipressants and skipped beats" you will see many people that have this.

 

Unfortunately, until your system stabilizes on a lower dose of the zoloft this may well continue.  Try not to let it drive you too crazy.  I know it's easier said than done.

 

This too shall pass.

 

Best,

 

Andy

[Amy238]

Andy, technically as you said it might be a skipped heart beat.

 

But when I try to put into words what I am feeling, I am jolted out of sleep and only vague sensation of last few secs I have is as if “something stopped”, did I stop breathing for few secs or did my heart stop for few secs there ? 

What follows after that is usually panic. 

 

Trazodone 25 mg is I believe a low dose and not as sedating. Seroquel 25 mg if compared might be more sedating. And so I was constantly drifting in and out of sleep. And more than once I felt it vividly, no heart beat, cold wash over my chest and belly and then back to wakefulness caused by panic that followed. 

 

I did sleep study on Friday, hopefully it would capture something. I would be submitting the device on Monday. Not sure how long before results would be out.

 

I almost went to ER then didn’t. I am wide awake now, almost noon and all symptoms have improved.

Haven’t had a chance to go buy oral syringe. Will take 1 mg Zoloft today. 

 

Probably will skip on any sleep med tonight. 

 

Thank you again for this forum, where I feel I am being heard. Sorry about my long, detailed posts, but it helps writing it all down and knowing someone who understands might be reading.

[Amy238]

Thank you Andy. I just happened to read your last post after I posted mine. 

I shall sleep better knowing that it’s a common side-effect. But you are right, in the moment it happens everything feels hopeless and just the desire for it all to end.

[apace41]

23 minutes ago, Amy238 said:

But you are right, in the moment it happens everything feels hopeless and just the desire for it all to end.

 

I understand, Amy, but the next step in your evolution of learning to deal with this withdrawal process is waking up and realizing that even though you feel like everything is falling apart, it has happened before, it is not going to kill you, and you go get a cup of chamomile tea rather than calling the nurse or heading to the ER.  It sucks like nobody who doesn't experience can imagine, but you will survive.

 

Best,

 

Andy

[Amy238]

Agreed, it's been happening for few weeks now. Except some of the nights, it feels more vivid and real. And then reports online where people saying people actually died in sleep because of extremely erratic heart rates during with-drawls :-( But yes I do not have any prior history of heart problems which was probably the case in severe cases.

 

I have to learn to gather myself together and think positive.

I shall.

[Amy238]

I took 1.5 mg of zoloft today using oral syringe. Feel ok so far, slightly elevated bpm.

I didn't take anything for sleep tonight. Will see how it goes. Am pretty tired/sleep-deprived from last night's tactics of fighting withdrawl, hopefully will fall asleep.

 

[PoetJester]

Hi Amy

 

i don't really have any good advice for you, but i did want to say that i suffer from these choking attacks too since stopping zoloft (and zyprexa) in 2014.  i was on both drugs for about 14 years and during this time i lost the ability to sleep on my back.  whenever i would try to sleep on my back, i would get this horrible sinking feeling like my heart was collapsing on itself or something and i would feel this incredible sadness and would have to turn on my side to be able to sleep.  never had this problem or sensation before the meds.  part of it may have been weight gain from the drugs (i gained 70 lbs), but i noticed a change in my ability to sleep on my back before i started gaining weight from the drugs.  After i quit the meds cold turkey i started having the choking sensations that you are describing whenever i tried sleeping on my back again.  i would only be asleep a minute or two and would wake up gasping and choking  where it felt like my windpipe had collapsed and have to run and drink water as fast as possible or else choke to death, i guess.  Basically, i can only sleep on my sides now and then not very well at that.

 

Derek

[Amy238]

Will take 1.5 mg again today with no accompanying sleeping pill.

 

I slept for 8 hours straight, I might be breaking through, really hopeful. There is a heaviness in chest, and exhaustion likely due to the roller-coaster caused by the cortisol spikes but I have a clear head and overall feeling good.

 

Started the night believing there would be no sleep, cortisol spikes hittting hard.

Andy's advice was ringing in my mind

22 hours ago, apace41 said:

 

I understand, Amy, but the next step in your evolution of learning to deal with this withdrawal process is waking up and realizing that even though you feel like everything is falling apart, it has happened before, it is not going to kill you, and you go get a cup of chamomile tea rather than calling the nurse or heading to the ER.  It sucks like nobody who doesn't experience can imagine, but you will survive.

 

Best,

 

Andy

 

Also, read these two articles right before bed,

http://www.stop-anxiety-panic-attack.com/blog/how-to-stop-nocturnal-panic-attacks

https://moodsmith.com/panic-disorder/#stop

 

While the first described the symptoms, second had a great strategy on how to cope with it. It almost turned a switch in my brain.

@PoetJester, last night, every time I had these feelings of heart collapsing which was within 2 minutes of closing my eyes, I learned to ignore, enforcing the belief it's nothing but a cortisol spike, and it can't harm you and it's a normal sensation. I must have had tens of these last night, I would just turn over and go back to sleep. And it helped, I know I continued to have these through the night but through the course of night frequency seemed to have come down.

 

 

 

[Altostrata]

On 11/11/2017 at 8:35 PM, Amy238 said:

I took 12.5 mg today. Should I go down to 5 mg tomorrow ? Or even lower ? Can someone advice please ? I will buy an oral syringe tomorrow.

 

To what drug are you referring?

 

On 11/11/2017 at 11:00 PM, Amy238 said:

I agree Altostrata, the trigger to these symptoms is not psychological because I am fast asleep. Then they might be cortisol spike but I usually have them within 1 to 2 hour of falling asleep, and I continue to have them throughout the night as long as I am asleep.

 

1. Friday night- Sat morn - Slept at 2 am, and sat upright on bed at 4 am after having 3-4 of these episodes, didn't go back to sleep until 6:30 am. Slept from 6:30 until 9:30 am, constantly waking up heart-racing, sweating around my head and neck.

2. Thurs night- Fri morning - Slept at 12 midnight, woke up at 2 am(again after 4-5 episodes), didn't go back to sleep until 6 am. Slept for 6 am until 9:30 am, again kept waking up sweaty, heart-racing, will check the clock and try go back to sleep.

3. Night before above, slept at 10:30 pm, was feeling extremely wiped out, woke up at 12:20 am with a gasping episode, forced myself to stay awake entire night until 7:30 am. Slept for couple of hours until 9:30 am. Saw the physician the same day, and you guys responded to me as well. Up until this night I was not sleeping out of fear that I will choke to death in sleep. But then doctor reassured that it wouldn't happen, you guys explained to me what was going on and so next 2 nights #2 and #1 I forced myself to keep going back to sleep. So even though slept for more hours through the night, it was very restless.

 

I will take Seroquel instead of Trazodone tonight.

 

Those are good notes but we MUST also know what time you took your drugs, and at what dosages.

 

Did you switch directly from trazodone to Seroquel? I'm sorry if you thought this is what we were suggesting. We recommend very gradual changes.

 

Please do not make changes in more than one drug at a time, that confuses things a great deal.

 

If you're having a bad reaction to 25mg Seroquel, take less. Keep notes of everything you do, drug-wise, and daily symptoms.

[Amy238]

Altostrata, I was referring zoloft.

I took 12.5 mg on sat, 1.5 mg yesterday and 1.5 mg today. I will update my signature.

 

I went without any sleeping pill last night, and not only survived it but slept through it.

I know it comes and goes in waves but I am really hopeful. Since zoloft and Trazodone don't seem to be a good combination, I thought I could go back to Seroquel.

Yesterday, I couldn't bring myself to take any sleeping pill after the extreme grogginess and panic earlier in the morning.

Will see how that goes. Re-instating zoloft might be helping with sleep.

 

I agree I shouldn't be making changes to more than one drug, gets very confusing. I am taking notes on paper every day now, dose of med and symptoms.

Thank you for all your sage advice.

[apace41]

1 hour ago, Amy238 said:

I slept for 8 hours straight, I might be breaking through, really hopeful. There is a heaviness in chest, and exhaustion likely due to the roller-coaster caused by the cortisol spikes but I have a clear head and overall feeling good.

 

This is good news, Amy.  Just remember that Rome wasn't built in a day and you might have some ups and downs before you stabilize.  If you hit a snag, try not to let it knock you so far down that you have more trouble climbing back up.  You will stabilize -- it just takes time.

 

Stick with the program and keep taking those notes so you can get ongoing guidance here.

 

Best,

 

Andy

[Amy238]

Took 1.5 mg zoloft at 12 noon today.

 

Older symptoms of dry mouth, dry nose, gasping have improved greatly.

I have other symptoms which are bothersome but I can definitely tolerate these better.

 

Muscle aches, exhaustion and fatigue, arms limp, by 5 pm I can no longer sit up or work on computer, have to lie down. After 2-3 hours, start to feel better but evenings after night fall are always bit scary, feel heart palpitations. I make it a point to walk around, engage in some physical activity, it helps.

Craving for sweet food, nothing else tastes good. Some depression no doubt, wanting to break free.

 

Though looking back, the craziness during past few days and nights has certainly subsided.

 

I will continue on dose of 1.5 mg zoloft tomorrow. How would I know if I need to stay on the same dose or need to go up ?

 

Andy, Altostrata, Ali, CC and other wonderful members on this forum, am forever grateful to you all for being there.

[Amy238]

Just wanted to add a small note. I was supposed to have 1 mg but day 1 didn't have a proper container, was in the park, ended up taking 1.5 mg. Then decided to stick with it as to not cause any more variation in dose.

 

Day 3 of reinstatement, I ate a full meal after a long time.

[Amy238]

With increased sanity, read the complete article on reinstatement(hopefully) without missing on details this time. 

 

Now I am wondering, assuming I stay stable on this low dose of 1.5mg for say a month or two, will that be a good enough time to stop again. Or may be taper down to 1 mg and then 0.5 and then stop.

Honestly I am bewildered at how such a small dose of reinstatement has been effective.

 

Another observation(may be not to be taken seriously because hasn’t been validated enough)

while on Zoloft - my average heart rate - approx. 108 bpm, high - 130 , low -65

While off of Zoloft during withdrawl - 75 bpm but high variation between lows and highs, high -167, low- 44

After reinstatement - 85 bpm, don’t have data for highs and lows yet

 

Is it possible WD symptoms will come back full force once I stop few months from now ? 

From the statistics we have, do we know if many people have been able to be completely off of Zoloft without WD if they tapered very slowly.