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Matisse

Matisse 80-90% of my symptoms GONE

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Matisse

Hi

 

I remember over 2 years ago coming to this site for inspiration and guidance. I only wrote a few things but I read lots. I loved reading the positive stories and they kept me going through the hell. 

I was on Paroxetine for 13 years, I couldn't get off due to withdrawals etc. My doctor advised to switch to another drug and I thought Prozac would help. To cut it short I went into hell after a month and they told me to stop the Prozac. That is where the journey began. 

In the first year I experienced ALL of the symptoms, Akathesia, Anhedonia, convulsions, dizziness, flu like, sound and light sensitivity, crazy neuro emotions, rashes, pins and needles, hallucinations, mania, pain everywhere etc etc. I had waves and Windows and after a year most of the severe symptoms, the convulsions, akathesia, hallucinations went but I was left with neuro emotions, anhedonia and I then developed sensitivity to fragrances etc.

i am now coming upto 3 years off and I can say my emotions are massively improved, I don't have the rages, My anhedonia is massively improved, can feel love now and more. I have even been feeling sexual urges gradually over the past year and now it feels normal.

The only symptoms I have left are Chemical sensitivity (which is hell because I am isolated and can't go out without a mask) some rashes and ptsd due to the withdrawal.

The positive thing is All the other MASS of over 50 symptoms went, some went faster than others and some went so gradually over years.

i still have lots to heal and if my chemical sensitivity went I would feel brilliant and would go back to work and do things.

i hope this gives hope to everyone because this is what we need.

sending you all my love and courage to get through this

Tracey xxx

 

p.s

what helped me through was patience and support 

I tried to accept what was happening to me and just let it be ( yes it was hard to do but it helped)

distractions were essential, like Disney films and games to focus my mind on something positive

Food and supplements were important too, I cut out all sugar ( I have the occasional chocolate) but that helped so much with my moods. I eat healthy and avoid processed food

i have natural good supplements like vitamin D3, k2, magnesium etc. I gradually increased the dose over the years and my vitamin D deficiency has improved massively, I'm now in normal range. Some things worked others made me worse but I tried things very cautiously (small doses first) 

Everyone is different and what worked for me might not for you.

Also I stayed away from forums and places that talked about withdrawal because it caused me to be severely depressed. It was helpful at times but I don't search for it anymore.

i haven't been back to this site for a year but I remember how I clung onto positive stories so I hope this gives you something positive to keep going.

xxx

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apace41

Tracey,

 

Great news!  Congratulations!

 

Have you looked at either Gupta or Dynamic Neural Retraining for the chemical sensitivity?  The latter program has had great success for that condition. 

 

Best,

 

Andy

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Matisse

Hi, yes I purchased the DNRS, but I'm too afraid to do it.

it sounds crazy but I'm scared it won't work and then I'm out of options. It's frustrating to just have this one symptom left. I am exploring more supplements and then I will have to just suck it up and do the dnrs.

Unfortunately the ptsd I have makes it hard to trust things etc.

sorry I've gone into negative stuff when this is positive lol

x

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bgoggles1

Hi there!! So glad you are recovering. It's so great to hear a positive success story. I'm struggling with getting off the Zoloft cold turkey when my doctor took me off pretty quickly. I was on a total of 3 anti depressants for 2 and 1/2 years. And my doctor took me off Zoloft right after my pregnancy. I have been experiencing terrible head Sensations such as head spins, dizziness, Zapped like Sensations. And almost falling Sensations and my head. It's terrible. Did you have these symptoms as well and when did they start improving for you? I also have terrible head 

pressure and headaches and eye floaters. I also have all the neuro emotions as well. Again, thank you for posting your story it's encouraging to hear.

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Matisse

I had all the symptoms, and they all went at different times. The thing is everyone is different and so no one can say when they will be gone, but they will go eventually.

If I had known, all that I know now I would have tapered, gradually over years.

i do my own research now and trust what I know, not my doctor.

It sounds like you have only just started with withdrawal? 

I would read as much as you can from this site and learn from everyone 

you will get there x

 

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Matisse

These are the symptoms I had that are gone now:

 

Migraines

nausea (was intense at times)

pins and needles all over

Racing thoughts (scary at times)

Crazy intense anger

Crying all the time

Akathesia (worse sensation ever)

Mania

out of body feelings

Hallucinations (shapes and moving floors etc)

convulsions (whole body legs jolting)

Intense Migraines (unbelievable pain)

bladder pain/constant urination

Anhedonia (can creep in some days but gone now)

No sexual desire

Noise sensitivity (was bad at times)

tinnitus (get it occasionally now but was bad at times) 

Insomnia (scary at times, do have some bad nights sleep but nothing like before)

Temors (arms and legs would shake for hours)

Dizzyness (horrible)

My legs would buckle and I couldn't walk

Intense Fatigue 

pain in joints, just pain everywhere at times

Flu like feeling 

Eye floaters (they are still there unfortunately but don't notice them)

severe stress at doing simple things

Intense Brain fog (still get this sometimes but not as bad)

losing my mind feeling

Brain Zaps

weird body sensations in brain and body (fingers in skull, horrid)

electrocuted feelings in body, burning like

twitches etc

There are probably lots more but it's hard to remember them all

hope that helps.

 

 

 

 

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bgoggles1

Thank you for replying. I am 8 months out from stopping Zoloft but my doctor tried me back on a small dose of Lexapro and it sent me through the roof, and had a pretty bad reaction to that. I was on that for about 3 weeks. It was horrible. that was 4 months ago. So I am still struggling. I have a lot of Sensations in my head unfortunately. I have a lot of the symptoms that you mentioned such as Tremors migraines eye floaters brain fog, etc. Did you have intense brain zaps? I seem to have that constantly. I also have a lot of nerve pain in my neck and upper shoulders. And the feeling like I can't be calm. I feel very restless. Thank you again for replying. So glad that you're doing better. I cry a lot because of this but it's also reassuring to hear other people's success stories. I also agree with not going on too many websites. I don't even read the symptoms page on here because it sends me through the roof with fear and anxiety. There's just too many horror stories. There needs to be more positive success stories online about how people do get through this and they do heal.

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Matisse

Hi, yes I forgot brain zaps, just added to list.

ive heard of people who were put on different meds to ease withdrawal who had a reaction. Can't remember what they call it.

its advised not to go on any drug because it can cause this.

People have returned to the drug they originally went off to ease withdrawal but that can also cause reactions.

i hope you find help on here from lots of others who have been through it.

Be patient with yourself, it can take months and years but you will heal.

i thought the same as you that it would never end but the symptoms gradually went, sometimes symptoms went overnight never to return.

its all individual and your so strong for going through it

x

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TryingToHoldOn
21 minutes ago, Matisse said:

These are the symptoms I had that are gone now:

 

Migraines

nausea (was intense at times)

pins and needles all over

Racing thoughts (scary at times)

Crazy intense anger

Crying all the time

Akathesia (worse sensation ever)

Mania

out of body feelings

Hallucinations (shapes and moving floors etc)

convulsions (whole body legs jolting)

Intense Migraines (unbelievable pain)

bladder pain/constant urination

Anhedonia (can creep in some days but gone now)

No sexual desire

Noise sensitivity (was bad at times)

tinnitus (get it occasionally now but was bad at times) 

Insomnia (scary at times, do have some bad nights sleep but nothing like before)

Temors (arms and legs would shake for hours)

Dizzyness (horrible)

My legs would buckle and I couldn't walk

Intense Fatigue 

pain in joints, just pain everywhere at times

Flu like feeling 

Eye floaters (they are still there unfortunately but don't notice them)

severe stress at doing simple things

Intense Brain fog (still get this sometimes but not as bad)

losing my mind feeling

There are probably lots more but it's hard to remember them all

hope that helps.

 

 

 

 

Thank you so much for coming back and sharing your story.  I am so glad that you have seen so much healing and hope the chemical sensitivities resolve.  Did you also have burning brain, head and face?  Or weird brain sensations that felt like your brain was pulsating, squeezing, rolling, etc?  Also, did you experience numbness in your face or muscle twitches all over your body?  Did you feel like there was an electrical current constantly running through your body?  How about severe suicidal depression?  I’m a year out and am really really tormented.  Did you ever feel like you’d never get better or heal?  I’m sorry for all the questions.  

 

 

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TryingToHoldOn
11 minutes ago, bgoggles1 said:

Thank you for replying. I am 8 months out from stopping Zoloft but my doctor tried me back on a small dose of Lexapro and it sent me through the roof, and had a pretty bad reaction to that. I was on that for about 3 weeks. It was horrible. that was 4 months ago. So I am still struggling. I have a lot of Sensations in my head unfortunately. I have a lot of the symptoms that you mentioned such as Tremors migraines eye floaters brain fog, etc. Did you have intense brain zaps? I seem to have that constantly. I also have a lot of nerve pain in my neck and upper shoulders. And the feeling like I can't be calm. I feel very restless. Thank you again for replying. So glad that you're doing better.

Did you also have burning brain, head and face?  Or weird brain sensations that felt like your brain was pulsating, squeezing, rolling, etc?  Also, did you experience numbness in your face or muscle twitches all over your body?  Did you feel like there was an electrical current constantly running through your body? Do you have insomnia?

 

I was also in zoloft for a little over 2 years. I also had a 5 month stint in latuda & 2.5 months on lamictal.  Everything  made me worse and the nail in the coffin was reinstating sertraline at too high of a dose that gave me serotonin syndrome.

 

The neuroemotions are insane, but the physical symptoms are so painful and weird.

 

 

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Matisse

Hi and yes I had such weird brain and body sensations they are hard to describe.

they came in waves and Windows. The first year was the worse.

like I said my symptoms went throughout the years etc, some were gradual, some instant. 

I remember feel liking like there were hands and fingers rummaging in my skull, it was horrible. Such weird body sensations. It's hard to remember them all because there was so many. They will go with time x

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Matisse

Had twitches everywhere and the burning sensations, plus sensations of being electrocuted all over the body. They have all gone now.

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bgoggles1
15 minutes ago, TryingToHoldOn said:

Did you also have burning brain, head and face?  Or weird brain sensations that felt like your brain was pulsating, squeezing, rolling, etc?  Also, did you experience numbness in your face or muscle twitches all over your body?  Did you feel like there was an electrical current constantly running through your body? Do you have insomnia?

 

I was also in zoloft for a little over 2 years. I also had a 5 month stint in latuda & 2.5 months on lamictal.  Everything  made me worse and the nail in the coffin was reinstating sertraline at too high of a dose that gave me serotonin syndrome.

 

The neuroemotions are insane, but the physical symptoms are so painful and weird.

 

 

I was kind of in the same boat exactly when they took me off Zoloft they tried to put me on Lexapro right away and they thought I had serotonin toxicity as well. And then about 3 months later they tried a small dose again and I had a reaction to it. So now I am 4 months out struggling. But it seems like you're about one year out. You should be turning the corner soon, I have no doubt. You will find a break. I'm confident in that and the symptoms will definitely lesson and then disappear for sure. Healing will happen for you. And yes I had all of those symptoms and my most difficult symptoms are in my head all the rolling Sensations, zaps dizziness in the head and it's like there's almost a tightness in the head where I can't move it. It's awful. So I know what you're going through. But I feel like you're close to the end. Don't give up.

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Scorpio

Hi matisse

thank you so much for taking the time to post your recovery. It gives me and I’m sure so many others hope while we are going through this hell. Nine months of misery and had got to the point of giving up hope but stories like these keep me going. 

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Littlegrandma

Tracey

ditto what Scorpio just said. 

Thank you so much for coming back to give us hope. 

Omg. I have exact symptoms and fear they’d never go. Your words are what so many of us need right now. Thank you and a big hug. Lg

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bgoggles1
1 hour ago, TryingToHoldOn said:

Did you also have burning brain, head and face?  Or weird brain sensations that felt like your brain was pulsating, squeezing, rolling, etc?  Also, did you experience numbness in your face or muscle twitches all over your body?  Did you feel like there was an electrical current constantly running through your body? Do you have insomnia?

 

I was also in zoloft for a little over 2 years. I also had a 5 month stint in latuda & 2.5 months on lamictal.  Everything  made me worse and the nail in the coffin was reinstating sertraline at too high of a dose that gave me serotonin syndrome.

 

The neuroemotions are insane, but the physical symptoms are so painful and weird.

 

 

I read your story... Your sounds similar to mine especially with being postpartum. Your a ways out than me but you will heal!!! The brain does have an amazing way of healing... That and God's divine healing. We will get there! It's coming for you! 

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apace41
14 hours ago, Matisse said:

Hi, yes I purchased the DNRS, but I'm too afraid to do it.

it sounds crazy but I'm scared it won't work and then I'm out of options.

 

Not crazy at all, but not your only option.  The Gupta program might help if DNRS doesn’t.

 

So, that should give you the impetus to try. 

 

Best,

 

Andy

 

 

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Happy2Heal

oh Matisse I am so happy for you!
thanks so much for coming back and updating us on how you are doing

 

 

such wonderful news!
I, myself am coming up on 6 mos off the psych meds after a messy taper and I'm thrilled at how well I am doing

still have some "waves" of minor symptoms here and there but feel almost fully healed

 

 

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potions

Thank you so much for posting Matisse. You said you had no sexual desire, does that mean you had PSSD/genital numbness? How bad were your sexual/inability to love symptoms? Thank you ❤️

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Matisse

Hi potions

 

i didn't have the numbness I just had no desire at all and could not find anyone attractive or feel live etc. It was horrible because I never thought I would feel that desire or live again. It would come back in patches then it just gradually went and I didn't even notice it. 

I used to focus on it all the time and then I just accepted it etc. It's only really been the last 6 months that I have noticed how I feel more and feel love and am attracted to guys again and my partner. It was when I didn't pay attention to it anymore that it changed without me doing anything.

i don't know if this helps you and someday I still feel a little flat but nothing like before. I listen to music again and feel it and connect with other emotions again. I feel that stress massively impacts this and when our bodies are healing from withdrawal our bodies are stuck on this massive stress response.

hope things get better for you x

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Migotka
On 30/03/2018 at 4:15 PM, Matisse said:

Hi

 

I remember over 2 years ago coming to this site for inspiration and guidance. I only wrote a few things but I read lots. I loved reading the positive stories and they kept me going through the hell. 

I was on Paroxetine for 13 years, I couldn't get off due to withdrawals etc. My doctor advised to switch to another drug and I thought Prozac would help. To cut it short I went into hell after a month and they told me to stop the Prozac. That is where the journey began. 

In the first year I experienced ALL of the symptoms, Akathesia, Anhedonia, convulsions, dizziness, flu like, sound and light sensitivity, crazy neuro emotions, rashes, pins and needles, hallucinations, mania, pain everywhere etc etc. I had waves and Windows and after a year most of the severe symptoms, the convulsions, akathesia, hallucinations went but I was left with neuro emotions, anhedonia and I then developed sensitivity to fragrances etc.

i am now coming upto 3 years off and I can say my emotions are massively improved, I don't have the rages, My anhedonia is massively improved, can feel love now and more. I have even been feeling sexual urges gradually over the past year and now it feels normal.

The only symptoms I have left are Chemical sensitivity (which is hell because I am isolated and can't go out without a mask) some rashes and ptsd due to the withdrawal.

The positive thing is All the other MASS of over 50 symptoms went, some went faster than others and some went so gradually over years.

i still have lots to heal and if my chemical sensitivity went I would feel brilliant and would go back to work and do things.

i hope this gives hope to everyone because this is what we need.

sending you all my love and courage to get through this

Tracey xxx

 

p.s

what helped me through was patience and support 

I tried to accept what was happening to me and just let it be ( yes it was hard to do but it helped)

distractions were essential, like Disney films and games to focus my mind on something positive

Food and supplements were important too, I cut out all sugar ( I have the occasional chocolate) but that helped so much with my moods. I eat healthy and avoid processed food

i have natural good supplements like vitamin D3, k2, magnesium etc. I gradually increased the dose over the years and my vitamin D deficiency has improved massively, I'm now in normal range. Some things worked others made me worse but I tried things very cautiously (small doses first) 

Everyone is different and what worked for me might not for you.

Also I stayed away from forums and places that talked about withdrawal because it caused me to be severely depressed. It was helpful at times but I don't search for it anymore.

i haven't been back to this site for a year but I remember how I clung onto positive stories so I hope this gives you something positive to keep going.

xxx

Hi 

 

Am so happy that you are getting better.. 😊 

When you said you had waves and windows did you feel better mentally physically or like old your self ? How did you know you had a windows ? 

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Altostrata

Hello, Migotka. Please start an Introductions topic for yourself so we can get to know you and answer your questions.

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LexAnger

Thank you so much Migotka for taking time and sharing the very positive update! You are a hero surviving this most incredible ordeal! 

 

Wish you continuous speedy healing! 

 

 

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Matisse

Hi Migotka, the Windows felt great and it was kind of obvious as I would feel like myself, I would feel things again and would be physically doing better. Sometimes it would last a day or a few days at a time. The waves were unbearable physically and mentally and then there is the middle ground when you feel bad but it's somewhat bearable compared the waves. It would be a mix of symptoms in waves both physical and mental, emotional  etc it was horrific torture at times but the worse part was the first year.

Like I said if I didn't have the chemical sensitivity I would be nearly 100% recovered from all my symptoms and would be able to live a normal life again. Unfortunately I'm stuck indoors because I cannot tolerate any fragrances and if I leave the house I have to wear a mask. I don't know if the withdrawal has damaged my mast cells. 

It's like a cruel joke.....I am recovered but i can't live

obviously this does not happen to most in recovery do don't be scared I'm just unlucky

 

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TryingToHoldOn

Matisse,

 

How long did your insomnia last?  I’m going on 16 months.  To make matters worse, I never feel tired or sleepy.

 

Also, when did your emotional symptoms start leveling out?  I have tremendous issues cycling through emotions and they are extreme and very frightening.  At 13 months off, The worst emotions uncontrollable sobbing spells (can last for hours),  rage (screaming, throwing things, crying, etc.), deep dark suicidal depression, and a state close to catatonic (it feels as though my brain shuts off and the very soul is sucked out of me.  I just sit or lie in bed and stare at the wall, unable to engage in any way with my family).  I feel absolutely crazy and out of control.

 

Thank you again for continuing to provide hope and support for those of us who are still struggling.  I am very sorry to hear about your chemical sensitivities.  I pray in time that will heal. 💗

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PSVT
On ‎22‎/‎04‎/‎2018 at 8:17 PM, Matisse said:

the Windows felt great and it was kind of obvious as I would feel like myself, I would feel things again and would be physically doing better. Sometimes it would last a day or a few days at a time. The waves were unbearable physically and mentally and then there is the middle ground when you feel bad but it's somewhat bearable compared the waves. It would be a mix of symptoms in waves both physical and mental, emotional  etc it was horrific torture at times but the worse part was the first year.

 

Good News that you are recovering well Matisse and Thank you for returning with your success over this horrible time.

 

Out of curiosity.........what did the medical community say, or advise you, on these symptoms and withdrawal?

 

I am currently going through what you describe above at 6 1/2 months off with zero recognition from Doctors or the medical community other than I really need to be back on the "meds" because withdrawal only lasts a couple of weeks, maybe a couple of months and not with all these symptoms.........I need treatment for my "underlying condition", of which I had an actual medical issue that was misdiagnosed as anxiety so, they really got no idea!

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bgoggles1

Hi again! When would you say that you turned a corner and things started to really improve? 

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