Farfromhome604: Cold turkey aftermath

[Farfromhome604]

Mood is constantly up and down. Holding with the 6 beads - trying to make it to my next appointment with my psychiatrist on Thursday. 

 

Feeling like I'm trapped in a bubble/tunnel that I can't break out of. I don't feel like I'm part of the real world and yet I'm feeling so sensitive that anything that happens is liable to make me weep/break down. 

 

Just trying to stay present. 

[Lloyd]

Are you able to contact the clinic and get the appointment moved forward as an emergency? Try to distract yourself as much as possible, games, movies, music, puzzles, painting etc. Exercise is a big help for mood, walks or something more vigorous like running / cross trainer etc.

[Farfromhome604]

18 hours ago, Lloyd said:

Are you able to contact the clinic and get the appointment moved forward as an emergency? Try to distract yourself as much as possible, games, movies, music, puzzles, painting etc. Exercise is a big help for mood, walks or something more vigorous like running / cross trainer etc.

 

Hi Lloyd, 

 

Thanks for checking in on me. 

 

I couldn't get in to see the psychiatrist any sooner. I'm feeling a lot of anxiety this morning.

 

Trying to self-soothe but feeling like I can't get out from under this huge cloud. 

[Farfromhome604]

Saw the psychiatrist. He said he’d never heard of having such bad side effects with such a small dose of Effexor. We agreed however that there was no point in continuing with it if it was just giving me more problems. 

 

He suggested that I try a drug called Agomelatine instead to try and restabilise. He said that coming off of it requires no tapering and that it has low side effects. It’s  a non-SSRI/SNRI. 

 

Not sure what to do. He kept telling me that I need to be aware that medication may not be the answer to my problem. Although this is a refreshing take from a psychiatrist, I guess my desperation for a game plan made me almost wish he would just tell me what to do. 

 

Anxiety is pretty intense today; mood is up and down; insomnia intense last night; nausea present but not overpowering. 

 

Talking to my therapist tomorrow - we’ll see if she has any insight.

[Lloyd]

How are you going with everything? Did your therapist provide any insight? Hope you are doing OK & finding some relief in activities or friends & family.

Been feeling pretty off for the last few days hence why i haven't responded, cant tell if its from the flu shot last week, a virus or withdrawal. Maybe all 3 =( I had about 2mg of Prozac (single dose) 25 days ago, so maybe that's finally wearing off (it has a really long half life) and now i have to deal withdrawal from that too. I got this strange hot fuzzy feeling all over my face and head. Quite bothersome =( Arrrgh!

I want to book an appointment with my doctor but there is a 6 week wait for him which is useless - i live in the country. I guess i could book with one of the other ones but chances are they wont know what SSRI discontinuation syndrome is and will just assume it can be fixed with more drugs. If it could i would at-least have a way out to recover for a bit. But now im ultra sensitive to medications which makes that impossible. Chances are ill be a bit better in a few days anyway.

On the bright side, i *think* the derealization is showing some improvement. Hard to tell, sometimes things seem almost normal & then they dont.

I made myself go to head office (overnight) for work this week even though i wasn't well. I managed OK which is great, kept the smiles up and the facade of a normal person. Gets tiring keeping up the charade.

 

Not all doom and gloom i think there has been some improvement in some areas, small but tiny steps forward at least. 

Have you noticed anything that has improved since you started withdrawal?

 

[Farfromhome604]

11 hours ago, Lloyd said:

How are you going with everything? Did your therapist provide any insight? Hope you are doing OK & finding some relief in activities or friends & family.

Been feeling pretty off for the last few days hence why i haven't responded, cant tell if its from the flu shot last week, a virus or withdrawal. Maybe all 3 =( I had about 2mg of Prozac (single dose) 25 days ago, so maybe that's finally wearing off (it has a really long half life) and now i have to deal withdrawal from that too. I got this strange hot fuzzy feeling all over my face and head. Quite bothersome =( Arrrgh!

I want to book an appointment with my doctor but there is a 6 week wait for him which is useless - i live in the country. I guess i could book with one of the other ones but chances are they wont know what SSRI discontinuation syndrome is and will just assume it can be fixed with more drugs. If it could i would at-least have a way out to recover for a bit. But now im ultra sensitive to medications which makes that impossible. Chances are ill be a bit better in a few days anyway.

On the bright side, i *think* the derealization is showing some improvement. Hard to tell, sometimes things seem almost normal & then they dont.

I made myself go to head office (overnight) for work this week even though i wasn't well. I managed OK which is great, kept the smiles up and the facade of a normal person. Gets tiring keeping up the charade.

 

Not all doom and gloom i think there has been some improvement in some areas, small but tiny steps forward at least. 

Have you noticed anything that has improved since you started withdrawal?

 

Small steps forward are worth hanging onto! They’re the only thing that keep me going and keep me convinced that being off ADs is the best long-term plan. Good for you for being able to see your progress, even though it’s more gradual than you’d like. 

 

I’d suggest making an appointment with your doctor, even if it doesn’t happen for 6 weeks. At least that way if things don’t improve you don’t have to wait any longer. You can also cancel it, so there’s no real down side other than the fact that you can’t see them right away. If it’s someone you trust it’s always worth having a concerned and caring ear. 

 

Things are *okay*. School work has been extremely frustrating - I think the Effexor experiment really set me back. 

 

My therapist thinks I should give this agomelatine a try for the next little while because it’s not an ssri or typical AD, isn’t supposed to have the crazy side effects of typical ADs, can be quit without tapering, and is supposed to help with sleep. If it helps to get me to a stable place, that would be a god send. And then I can hopefully come off of it more easily than trying to do a re-withdrawal of Effexor. 

 

I also recently saw my orthopedic specialist about my continuing pain. He suggested that my recent surgery might have gone wrong and that I may need further surgery. For the time being he’s suggesting I take another course of anti-inflammatories, and then we’ll reassess but I’m feeling incredibly disappointed and upset about the prospect of needing more surgery. It feels like a never-ending nightmare. 

 

Anyways, long update there. Sorry for rambling. 

 

Have you ever had the hot tingly feeling during your withdrawal process before? I’ve never experienced it so I can’t say what it’s about but I can definitely see how it would be really aggravating. 

[Lloyd]

Hows it going with the new medication? If you choose to take it i hope it works out well for you and gives you some reprieve!

Are you having difficulties with concentration and the ability to handle school work? I find i have difficulty concentrating since being off the effexor. I was quite sharp when i was on it.

I hope the surgery situation works out ok for you. Nothing worse than having to have something re-done and go through the same recovery. Just be aware that you could be a little more sensitive to pain killers during your withdrawal. 1 nurofen for me feels like ive taken 4. Coedine is a no go for me any more. Tramadol etc forget it.

Im going to book the appointment for the doctor. In the mean time i might see one of the other ones anyway. I'm tossing up whether to give reinstating another go, the concentration problems and anxiety are probably 2 of the biggest issues for me. The physical symptoms are pretty bothersome too. I did reinstate successfully last year after being off it for over a year. Maybe i need to talk to a psychiatrist as well. Getting some clarity about what's happening to me and why would be nice.

I've had a fair few physical sensations during withdrawal. Had the burning sensations though this time felt different. The thing is the symptoms are so broad and they come and go so i have no idea what to expect.

 

[Farfromhome604]

16 hours ago, Lloyd said:

Hows it going with the new medication? If you choose to take it i hope it works out well for you and gives you some reprieve!

Are you having difficulties with concentration and the ability to handle school work? I find i have difficulty concentrating since being off the effexor. I was quite sharp when i was on it.

I hope the surgery situation works out ok for you. Nothing worse than having to have something re-done and go through the same recovery. Just be aware that you could be a little more sensitive to pain killers during your withdrawal. 1 nurofen for me feels like ive taken 4. Coedine is a no go for me any more. Tramadol etc forget it.

Im going to book the appointment for the doctor. In the mean time i might see one of the other ones anyway. I'm tossing up whether to give reinstating another go, the concentration problems and anxiety are probably 2 of the biggest issues for me. The physical symptoms are pretty bothersome too. I did reinstate successfully last year after being off it for over a year. Maybe i need to talk to a psychiatrist as well. Getting some clarity about what's happening to me and why would be nice.

I've had a fair few physical sensations during withdrawal. Had the burning sensations though this time felt different. The thing is the symptoms are so broad and they come and go so i have no idea what to expect.

 

It’s so tough - the not knowing what is going to hit next in the withdrawal makes it feel like a tightrope walk. Getting input from a psychiatrist could be helpful. Maybe reinstatement is the way to go at this point but it’s really hard to know. What does your wife think? 

 

The concentration issues are pretty bad at the moment - it’s taking me much longer to do my work than it would have done pre-withdrawal. 

 

Today has been pretty good so far. I slept more soundly than usual last night and didn’t the cortisol rush this morning wasn’t quite so intense. I don’t know if that’s because the new med is already having an effect or it’s just a moment of semi-peace. 

 

Being in physical pain from the surgery/injury throws a whole other wrench in this journey. I’m hoping that the course of anti-inflammatories will help calm that side down a bit. 

 

Hope you’re having a good day  

[Lloyd]

Good to hear you had some improvement today. every bit counts!! Are you still able to tolerate pain medication? Ive found im able to concentrate better after eating. I also eat choc bars which sometimes helps.

Wife is not sure about what to do. Originally she was for reinstatement but last time i tried it didn't work out. The physical symptoms seems a little more intense lately. I was hoping for it to go the opposite way. Could have been aggravated from the small amount of Prozac i took 4 weeks ago. I think im now that sensitized that even the smallest amount of medication has a big effect.

I guess if i try reinstatement it will either go good or bad. Just worried about making things even worse than they are. I'm coping at the moment so im leaving it alone in the hopes it gets better.

I also often wonder as well if there is something else wrong. I did talk to my doctor last time about getting other scans (ie brain) to see if something else was wrong. He didn't think it was necessary, but i think i might have that conversation with him again.

 

 

[Lloyd]

Hope you are doing well and the new medication is helping!

Had a pretty good day today despite not having much sleep - my daughter kept waking up every few hours. Only had mild tingling / burning sensations and the brain fog wasn't as bad today. Mood fine, Anxiety didnt play up. Nice change!!

Overall i think im seeing improvement, hoefully it continues to trend that way!

[Farfromhome604]

50 minutes ago, Lloyd said:

Hope you are doing well and the new medication is helping!

Had a pretty good day today despite not having much sleep - my daughter kept waking up every few hours. Only had mild tingling / burning sensations and the brain fog wasn't as bad today. Mood fine, Anxiety didnt play up. Nice change!!

Overall i think im seeing improvement, hoefully it continues to trend that way!

Fantastic to hear about your day! So glad it was a good one, even though you weren’t able to sleep much. 

 

I hope the trend continues  

 

Wasn’t able to sleep last night either. I have felt like a zombie all day. Still managed to get some school work done and some housework as well, which is good. Hoping for a more restful night tonight. 

[Lloyd]

Today went well too which is great! Hopefully can keep up the trend. Glad you can still get study done, can be pretty difficult at times to concentrate! How are you going with the new medication?

[Farfromhome604]

1 hour ago, Lloyd said:

Today went well too which is great! Hopefully can keep up the trend. Glad you can still get study done, can be pretty difficult at times to concentrate! How are you going with the new medication?

So great to hear today went well

 

I had a really tough day today. I feel like my brain is all over the place and my mood was extremely low. I managed to get some sleep last night, which was good. But I've just been feeling really anxious all day, mixed with intense periods of depression. 

 

Here's hoping tomorrow goes a bit better.