Jump to content
btdt

Marriages destroyed by SSRI SNRI - Topix

Recommended Posts

Lee2367

Oh and she won't research anything about SSRI or educate herself. I just don't understand why.

Share this post


Link to post
mylifeisback

It's going to take a long time before you get I'm sorry but one day it will come it may take a while and that of the blue she's going to come to you and say I'm sorry. Right now she's not sorry for what she done because she doesn't even understand it herself it all takes time and a lot of it and that's where the patients come in.

Share this post


Link to post
Konjo

It's going to take a long time before you get I'm sorry but one day it will come it may take a while and that of the blue she's going to come to you and say I'm sorry..

 

My ex wrote me an e-mail where she said that she is thankful for all good moments of our relationship and she is sorry for all bad things that happened. 

 

That was all. After that she married  other guy.

Share this post


Link to post
mylifeisback

My husband has done and is doing everything in his power to make me happy. He is truly remorseful. It took along time for him to understand what was happening to himself but when his head was cleared he came to me with his apologies and remorse. I know several others that this same thing happened. I am sorry for your loss. This is truly a life changing experience.

Share this post


Link to post
hurtspouse

It will have been two years in May since my partner quit Paxil. We are back together, he is a lot more loving towards us all, but the remorse is still barely there. He still refuses to talk or move forward. He is still putting his own needs before his family and being really quite selfish. He makes promises of family holidays etc, but never follows through, but still does all his hobbies. I saw on another thread somewhere that people tend to take roughly the same amount of time that they were on the pills to recover. So for me that could be another two years until he is completely himself again! Most days things are ok. But because I don't agree with his selfish choices and have voiced them, he's started ignoring me and acting childish just like when he was on the pills. I really hoped we'd be back on track by now. No one can accuse me of not being patient (to the point of losing a lot of respect for myself). I wonder if he'll be one of the ones who never fully recover...

Share this post


Link to post
ShakeyJerr

Since getting off of these meds, I am a whole different person and it saved my marriage. Well, unless my withdrawal symptoms now destroy it. The pressure on my wife is immense. She is carrying the financial burden for the most part, working a difficult job that she hates to begin with. And she gets frustrated with me because there are days when I can't do much of anything around the house because the symptoms are so huge.

 

But I am grateful for my personality off of the drugs. And I do stay as helpful as possible. I have cut down to 3 days a week for work (very understanding boss, who actually was on Zoloft, did a perfect taper, got withdrawal but didn't know what it was and let her doctor put her back on Zoloft) - but even then it is very hard for me to go to the office and put in a full day.

 

SJ

Share this post


Link to post
Irenee

Hi, I would like to share my story. I was in a loving, beautiful relationship for six years. We loved eachother to bits. He proposed to me last summer. We were really looking forwards to a life together. After proposing he went on lexapro (20 mg), he almost immediately changed. He started picking fights, became cold, unloving and uncaring. Suddenly he also became what I would describe hypomanic. He started drinking and partying all the time. One day I found him on a dating site. He had no regrets what so ever. He could not see what was wrong with it. He became hostile an paranoid, thinking I was after his money. He changed his password to every account he had and kicked me out of the hous (we owned together). He said he wanted to be alone, that he finally was fealing fine. His personality totally changed. I do not recognise the man he has become. I have tried to give him space, to show him it is the medication doing this, but he doesen't want to listen. It is so increadable sad, we had the most beautiful relationship, looking forward to a life together. Five months after he proposed and started on lexapro this happens, why does he not wan't to see it? I have tried to talk to his doctor, but they are also telling him that he is fine now. I'm helpless, just praying that he will one day wake up from this nightmare and realise what he has done. All I think I can do for now is to stay away, he doesen't wan't to see me, and are treating me like the enemy, just for wanting him to taper down. This drug really can change people, and ruin relationships. (Sorry for the bad spelling, I almost never write in English)

Share this post


Link to post
ShakeyJerr

Hi, I would like to share my story. I was in a loving, beautiful relationship for six years. We loved eachother to bits. He proposed to me last summer. We were really looking forwards to a life together. After proposing he went on lexapro (20 mg), he almost immediately changed. He started picking fights, became cold, unloving and uncaring. Suddenly he also became what I would describe hypomanic. He started drinking and partying all the time. One day I found him on a dating site. He had no regrets what so ever. He could not see what was wrong with it. He became hostile an paranoid, thinking I was after his money. He changed his password to every account he had and kicked me out of the hous (we owned together). He said he wanted to be alone, that he finally was fealing fine. His personality totally changed. I do not recognise the man he has become. I have tried to give him space, to show him it is the medication doing this, but he doesen't want to listen. It is so increadable sad, we had the most beautiful relationship, looking forward to a life together. Five months after he proposed and started on lexapro this happens, why does he not wan't to see it? I have tried to talk to his doctor, but they are also telling him that he is fine now. I'm helpless, just praying that he will one day wake up from this nightmare and realise what he has done. All I think I can do for now is to stay away, he doesen't wan't to see me, and are treating me like the enemy, just for wanting him to taper down. This drug really can change people, and ruin relationships. (Sorry for the bad spelling, I almost never write in English)

My heart breaks for you, Irenee. These drugs have a way of putting the real person in a cage. I know that for me, when I would act horribly while on the meds, there was a voice inside of me that was the real me, telling the med-me to stop acting so horribly. Many other victims of these drugs say the same thing.

 

So no matter what comes next for you two, hold in your heart an image if who he was before. Sadly, that person may never come back, but at least you will have the comfort of that image.

 

I hope you don't mind if I lift you two up in prayer.

 

SJ

Share this post


Link to post
Henry

Hi Irenne

 

I have had the exact same thing happen to me recently.

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/14552-another-failed-relationship/

 

I don't know what to tell you because I am as confused as you. The only good thing that has come out of my situation is that she has actually stopped taking the meds 3 or 4 weeks ago, so she may get better and realise what she has done, then again, she might not.

 

I wish you all the best. Try to look after yourself, I know how awful and painful this is.

Share this post


Link to post
Coopergirl1

Hi you guys, just needed to reply to you and tell you I am in the same boat but only I was the drugged one. I have been tapering for a year and I am finally off medication. I can feel little tiny moments of myself come back and I pray my feelings come back for my partner like they were there before I was on these medications. Wish you the best and I'm here if you need any help

Share this post


Link to post
Henry

Hi cooper girl thanks for popping in. I do hope that your feelings come back too. I can only imagine how awful it is but st least you know that there is a problem.

 

Take care

Share this post


Link to post
mylifeisback

I have been through all of the same things, it has been 4 years and 4 months we just got back from an overnight hospital stay and nothing was found with many tests and nothing was found in know it is still withdrawal.

Share this post


Link to post
hurtspouse

I have been through all of the same things, it has been 4 years and 4 months we just got back from an overnight hospital stay and nothing was found with many tests and nothing was found in know it is still withdrawal.

Mlib, I am so sorry to hear that your husband is still suffering after all this time. Can I ask how long was he on the drugs for in total? Does he have regular difficulties due to his withdrawals? Does it happen less frequently as time goes by?

Share this post


Link to post
Irenee

Hi, Henry. Thank you for your reply. I really hope she comes back to herself again now that she has stopped taking her medication. I really feel for you and can only say how sorry I am that you also have to go through this nightmare. Please let us know how it is going.

Best of wishes.

 

Hi Irenne

 

I have had the exact same thing happen to me recently.

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/14552-another-failed-relationship/

 

I don't know what to tell you because I am as confused as you. The only good thing that has come out of my situation is that she has actually stopped taking the meds 3 or 4 weeks ago, so she may get better and realise what she has done, then again, she might not.

 

I wish you all the best. Try to look after yourself, I know how awful and painful this is.

Share this post


Link to post
Irenee

Hi, SJ. Thank you so much for the reply. Your words is vert comforting. Thank you for lifting us in your prayers.

Best of wishes for you.

 

 

 

Hi, I would like to share my story. I was in a loving, beautiful relationship for six years. We loved eachother to bits. He proposed to me last summer. We were really looking forwards to a life together. After proposing he went on lexapro (20 mg), he almost immediately changed. He started picking fights, became cold, unloving and uncaring. Suddenly he also became what I would describe hypomanic. He started drinking and partying all the time. One day I found him on a dating site. He had no regrets what so ever. He could not see what was wrong with it. He became hostile an paranoid, thinking I was after his money. He changed his password to every account he had and kicked me out of the hous (we owned together). He said he wanted to be alone, that he finally was fealing fine. His personality totally changed. I do not recognise the man he has become. I have tried to give him space, to show him it is the medication doing this, but he doesen't want to listen. It is so increadable sad, we had the most beautiful relationship, looking forward to a life together. Five months after he proposed and started on lexapro this happens, why does he not wan't to see it? I have tried to talk to his doctor, but they are also telling him that he is fine now. I'm helpless, just praying that he will one day wake up from this nightmare and realise what he has done. All I think I can do for now is to stay away, he doesen't wan't to see me, and are treating me like the enemy, just for wanting him to taper down. This drug really can change people, and ruin relationships. (Sorry for the bad spelling, I almost never write in English)

My heart breaks for you, Irenee. These drugs have a way of putting the real person in a cage. I know that for me, when I would act horribly while on the meds, there was a voice inside of me that was the real me, telling the med-me to stop acting so horribly. Many other victims of these drugs say the same thing.

 

So no matter what comes next for you two, hold in your heart an image if who he was before. Sadly, that person may never come back, but at least you will have the comfort of that image.

 

I hope you don't mind if I lift you two up in prayer.

 

SJ

Share this post


Link to post
sadandconfused

Hi! I hope everyone is doing okay. It's been about 10 months since my loss of feelings and there have been some days in the past few weeks where I finally am somewhat feeling like I could be getting better, like maybe I'm finally starting to thrive and feel VERY slightly something for my boyfriend and somewhat connected but it all goes away the next day and doesn't return for a good while. Does anyone think this is normal? Like I said the slight feeling I get isn't really being in love or anything close to that, but there are some times I feel that I don't wanna lose him. I hope this is a good sign. Thank you in advance!

Share this post


Link to post
ShakeyJerr

Hi! I hope everyone is doing okay. It's been about 10 months since my loss of feelings and there have been some days in the past few weeks where I finally am somewhat feeling like I could be getting better, like maybe I'm finally starting to thrive and feel VERY slightly something for my boyfriend and somewhat connected but it all goes away the next day and doesn't return for a good while. Does anyone think this is normal? Like I said the slight feeling I get isn't really being in love or anything close to that, but there are some times I feel that I don't wanna lose him. I hope this is a good sign. Thank you in advance!

 

Hi SadandConfused - 

 

First off, my heart goes out to you! The loss of feelings is not an easy thing to deal with.

 

Secondly - hooray! Hooray that some sort of feelings have come back for you! Even if they are fleeting, they are a sign that your body is healing, that your heart is overcoming the lies that the meds tell us.

 

So take what is going on as a good sign - because it is!

 

SJ

Share this post


Link to post
sadandconfused

 

Hi! I hope everyone is doing okay. It's been about 10 months since my loss of feelings and there have been some days in the past few weeks where I finally am somewhat feeling like I could be getting better, like maybe I'm finally starting to thrive and feel VERY slightly something for my boyfriend and somewhat connected but it all goes away the next day and doesn't return for a good while. Does anyone think this is normal? Like I said the slight feeling I get isn't really being in love or anything close to that, but there are some times I feel that I don't wanna lose him. I hope this is a good sign. Thank you in advance!

Hi SadandConfused -

 

First off, my heart goes out to you! The loss of feelings is not an easy thing to deal with.

 

Secondly - hooray! Hooray that some sort of feelings have come back for you! Even if they are fleeting, they are a sign that your body is healing, that your heart is overcoming the lies that the meds tell us.

 

So take what is going on as a good sign - because it is!

 

SJ

Aww thank you so much!! I appreciate everyone on this site seriously so much!!! Seriously I don't know where I'd be right now without you guys. It's just crazy cause when me and my boyfriend first met I didn't have to "try" at all to love him, it just happened so fast and I was so so crazy about him. And now it's like I'm always trying to find a reason to stay. Yes these pills definitely lie to us! That's such a good way to explain it. It's so crazy how you can be with someone for years and be so so in love and then feel so much nothingness.

Share this post


Link to post
zeeheather

I am feeling beyond lost and devastated. (Sorry this is so long, I've bolded the main point)


My boyfriend (together 1.5 years, living together for 6 months) has had issues with anxiety and OCD since he was a child. 3 months ago, his anxiety and panic attacks became too much to handle and he began looking for options. He went to his family doctor to get a prescription of CBD in pill form (weed without the THC high), but when I talked to him after the appointment, he said his doctor told him that he wanted him to try Celexa first. He was desperate for anything at this point, so he agreed to try it.
During the first 1.5 months on Celexa, he noted "not feeling like himself", but wasn't having any anxiety. After two months though, he had three different scares where he was feeling anxious, had blurry vision and experienced memory loss. He made appointment with his doctor to discuss this, and his doctor denied it had anything to do with the SSRI, but switched him over to Paxil anyway. This is when the beginning of the end began...


Within the first week on Paxil, he became distant, irritated at little things I did, and became completely emotionless. He admitted to not feeling any emotion, just kind of existing. After the second week on Paxil, I came home from work one day and he said we needed to talk. He told me that he was having a hard time with his mental health and he needed to work on himself...alone. He said he had nothing to give to a relationship and I needed to move out. His eyes had lost their spark and seemed empty. For the next week, while I tried to figure out where I was going to live, he was cold and emotionless toward me, he looked at me as if I was a stranger. He admitted that over the last two weeks he slowly fell out of love with me and no longer felt anything toward me. He could not wait until I moved out, he wanted a "clean break" with no communication. 2 weeks before, we were so happy and laughing and he told me he loved me everyday.

I did a lot of research about SSRIs and their effect on love/relationships (pretty much non-stop searching for answers as to why he was acting this way). I went to him with all of this information, but he said he couldn't connect with what he was reading, because he still felt nothing for me. He said he appreciated me researching, but he didn't want to read anymore articles like that. That same day. he admitted he didn't enjoy feeling nothing and was going to book an appointment to wean off of the Paxil. His appointment to begin the weaning is tomorrow, we haven't spoken in 4 days since I moved out.

I am so worried that I've lost my best friend. I can't even express in words how in love I am with this man, but he is like a completely different person now. I am extremely hopeful that once he has weaned off the drugs, he'll remember me and how happy we were..and he'll reach out to me! But I'm also scared that I've lost him for good. I feel hopeless and unwanted, I've lost my home and my love. I don't want to give up on him, but it hurts so much to know that he doesn't care and he may have moved on already.

People who were on the drugs and experienced this, did you feel regret after a couple of weeks of weaning off? It's so hard not to message him or see him, but I am trying to give him space so I don't push him away anymore. He's only been on SSRIs for around 3 months, this is his 4th week on Paxil.

Share this post


Link to post
TeaBea

I'm sorry you're going through this.  It hurts so badly when there's nothing in the world you can do right now to change what's going on in his brain.  My advice is to keep your distance like he asks--or at least keep "feelings" out of any contact you have with him.  It can't do any good, but it can push him even further away.  The one thing I would do--especially since he knows you've researched this med--is inform him of the need to take his withdrawal even slower than the doctor suggests so that he has a better chance of getting off and staying off meds completely.  It's truly "Russian Roulette" whether or not you're gonna be one of the lucky ones with withdrawal.  

 

If/when he comes to you because his feelings are coming back, try not to overwhelm him and give him plenty of space.  My husband was overwhelmed by even mushy commercials while he relearned to deal with feelings (but then, he was on them for over 6 yrs).  Just be there for him and let him know you understand that it was all medication related.  It's hard.  But, if he's not "misbehaved" while being checked-out of the relationship, count your lucky stars!  Good luck to you both!!!

Share this post


Link to post
gloworm

I did not leave a relationship but I will tell you once off the medication .... regret comes back with a vengeance .  Regret about so much ... I was put on for a paradoxical reaction to a benzodiazepine ... he will be back ....

Share this post


Link to post
zeeheather

TeaBea - Thank you for your response, I really appreciate your advice. Last I spoke to him, he was very to-the-point and cold, so I've backed off. It's definitely hard to wrap my head around how quickly and drastically his personality changed, but it also makes it easier to come to terms with it being the drugs and not his true feelings.

I have a few pictures from the week before he started these drugs, when we were so happy and goofing around. I just keep looking at those pictures, so I remember the good times and try to remember that he will be back.

The first week that the drugs will fully be out of his system, he will be away for Christmas in Florida visiting family. I'm hoping that the distance will help him with any overwhelming feelings that may overcome him. I'm glad he'll be around family during that time.

I don't have a great support system, not a lot of people believe it's the drugs causing this. I guess they can't fathom how something that is supposed to help someone, can cause so much harm. It's frustrating, but I understand their ignorance. I'm just trying to stay positive and ignore any negativity about the situation. So I am happy that I found this forum and people are reaching out, I really do appreciate it so much! Thank you!

Share this post


Link to post
zeeheather

gloworm - Thank you for responding, I am glad that he will be aware of his impact. Not that I want him to hurt, but I do want him to understand the capabilities these drugs have, so he stays away in the future. Thank you for giving me hope, I miss him so much, I can't wait for this nightmare to be over!

Share this post


Link to post
EagleDoc
My 40 year old Fiancé has been off and on SNRI's and SSRI's for decades, since age 18, for PTSD due to various forms of neglect and abuse in childhood, through teenage years and continuing through most of her adult life with various "any harbor in a storm" relationships that always ended badly.  Turns out when I had her cytochrome P450 sub-enzymes tested, she was an ultra rapid metabolizer of her Effexor LA and would go into WD's essentially every night, given the rather short half life.  Violent, horrific nightmares (night TERRORS!), sweats, hallucinations, electric shocks throughout her body, insomnia, and God forbid if she missed a single daily dose she was in a fetal position, crying and sobbing for days!  As a medical professional (Internist) and as her Fiancé, she asked for my help in getting her off of them, so after much reading of sites like this one and medical journal articles, we came up with a plan of attack.  We gradually tapered down the shorter acting Effexor and when down to 25mg, added longer acting Zoloft 200 mg a day, with a several day half life. This took over a year, each taper consisted of halving the Effexor dose in each increment (specialty pharmacy compounded), starting at 150 mg a day (150->75->37.5->25->12.5->6.25->5->2.5->1.25->0.625->0.3125mg/day), longer in the early stages, but towards the end it was a month for each tapering step.  When on 0.3125mg/day for a month, she finally stopped, but had a nasty 7 day period of disorientation, confusion, unstable gait, incoordination - bumping into EVERY corner, piece of furniture, dropping things, falling down, all of which brought on more bruises, cuts, scrapes, impatience and frustration.  A self imposed rapid taper off the Zoloft (200mg x one week, 100mg x one week, 50mg x one week then 25mg/d currently) because she "wanted to get them out of her system as quickly as possible" ensued, and she only used the BZD Ativan sparingly, like once a day instead of the three times a day as I had prescribed.  It should be noted she also started taking Adderall XR 25mg A.M. And 10 mg P.M. in the mid-point of the Effexor taper as she could not concentrate with even a phone ringing while trying to work on the computer, nearly instantaneous impatience and frustration ensued, frequently accompanied by abusive yelling, berating and other nasty behaviors.  Mood swings, VIOLENT, erratic, angry behavior (read: nearly destroyed a 3,700 sq ft home, throwing outdoor plants into the living room, throwing a ceramic vase and breaking a 65" curved screen 4K UHDTV screen, breaking windows, holes in doors and walls from thrown, hard solid objects, broken shutters, furniture, banisters, door jams, dishes, pottery, gashes and fingernail claw marks all over my face, scalp, arms and a gold Cross chain ripped off my neck, Rolex watch broken, etc), constant crying, sleeplessness, daytime somnolence, precluded her from doing anything other than laying in bed all day.  We moved to a new rental condo., and it wasn't long before the next violent outburst, ALL of the kitchen cabinet China thrown and broken on the kitchen floor, a full size (and full) fire extinguisher thrown forcefully onto the hood of my MB SL500.   The Sheriffs were called by the neighbors for her crying at night.  It was impossible to have any rational conversation with her at all for most of the time.  For nearly all of these events, she had no recollection the following day and could even be very sweet and caring at times.  One morning, she got up and threw ALL of her meds down the sink, the Zoloft 25mg, Adderall XR, Ativan, Zyrtec.  That was a horrible day to say the least.  I don't know, maybe I began to understand what was going on in her world better, she was finally getting better, or she was just sick and tired of being sick and tired.  In any event, she finally allowed me (instead of her) to dose the medications appropriately, slow down the Zoloft taper, take the Ativan three times a day and regularly.  My plan from there is to add in the very long acting Prozac, 10 mg a day when gets down to 12.5 mg a day of Zoloft and then begin a slow, methodical taper off the Prozac with a 4-6 day half life (they make both 10 and 20 mg fluoxetine tablets and a 20mg/5ml suspension, so you don't have to count the beads in the capsules).
 
At first I took all of this behavior personally, thought she was "crazy", needed to be institutionalized and I was emotionally brutalized.  Then the clinician in me took over and I approached it much like I have approached patients undergoing alcohol, heroin, barbiturate or benzodiazepine withdrawals: as a MEDICAL diagnosis and problem, needing medical care, not a PSYCHIATRIC diagnosis simply needing more psych. meds.  This calm, non-confrontational, reactionary or defensive approach was what finally got her to cut me some slack; if I didn't let her "get my goad", she wouldn't escalate.
 
The family holidays like Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter have always been particularly hard on her, ever since her dirt bag husband left her for the butt ugly daughter ("Miss Piggy") of the local police chief, leaving her in the hospital, six months pregnant with their third child, dehydrated and puking constantly with hyperemisis gravidarum, on a Zofran drip.  He never paid child support, she had to work as a "dancer" to put a roof over their head, shoes on their feet and food on their table.  He subsequently got legal custody, via a corrupt attorney and his pal the judge, both of whom were friends of the police chief in rural Missouri.  After several abusive "any harbor in a storm" relationships, she ended up battered, beaten and left for dead, in a battered women's shelter.  Several calls to police for violations of restraining orders were treated as "civil disputes", ergo "nothing they could do".  My ass, a restraining order is a criminal complaint!!  After several months, she was shipped off in the cover of darkness, to live with her much older youngest sibling.  Her children were erroneously told by their father and step-mother (who INSISTED they call her "mom") that the court ordered them not to see their mother and that they were not allowed to visit her, both in direct violation of the child custody documents and court orders.  Child Protective Services was of little if any help, so she didn't see her kids for the next 10 years.  Her oldest daughter was sexually abused by her now step brother, but was forced to interact with him at family gatherings.  When she turned 20, she moved out of her dad's house with her boyfriend/fiancé and came to visit us.  Here she saw the court documents and learned the truth.  She had been put on Zoloft at age 16 for the step brother sexual abuse, and gained 20 pounds.  She stopped it abruptly and quickly lost the weight.  The second daughter turns 18 tomorrow, 11 days before Christmas.
 
Which brings us to today.  I bought both her daughters plane tickets to fly out on Christmas night.  I bought a seven bone prime rib and a Canadian goose to cook, as I have always done for my estranged family.  I hired a limo to take us to the airport to pick them up, bought tickets for movie studio tours, a whale watching trip, boat to Catalina and the big New Years Eve extravaganza at the Avalon Casino.  A week ago, in a discontinuation fit of rage, she YELLED at me at the top of her lungs, for all the neighbors to hear to IMMEDIATELY CANCEL the plane trips and all the planned events.  She reiterated this demand on several more occasions over the next week, saying her children didn't want to come visit her anyways, they hated her, she didn't want them to come see her while she was withdrawing and certainly didn't want me to take them anywhere fun if she couldn't go as well.  Knowing how emotionally and mentally upset and unstable she was, I held onto the tickets as I had gotten them at a good price and knew I would be gouged on the price if I had to repurchase them.  Unfortunately, she had made the reservations using my credit card and attached them to her email address.  Today she got the "get ready for your upcoming flight itinerary" email.  Twelve pages of expletive filled, vile, mean, vitriolic texts later, I was told I was "a liar!!"  And she could never trust me again!!  We were DONE as a couple and she was leaving tonight, to go to a "safe place where I couldn't find her".  So I finally did as she asked, I called and cancelled the flight, cancelled the hotel in Catalina, cancelled the Warner Brothers Studio Tour, cancelled the whale watching and cancelled the Casino New Year's Eve event.  I apologized for my "white lie" about cancelling the tickets, but told her I was doing it to hang onto some hope that she would finally have a nice Christmas.  Now she is sobbing, saying this is how every Christmas has ever been for her as long as she has lived.  Her father died of alcoholism when she was two, Mom was a "functional" schizophrenic with early onset Alzheimer's dementia, her mother never recogmized her after she was six years old.  She just took down the Pier One Imports angel in the entry way hall, the LED Christmas trees she had bought and made me take down my Jesus in the manger Kretsche scene I had bought.  Now she is trying to get her money back on the gifts she already bought and was having shipped to her kids, saying "if I can't have a nice Christmas, nobody can!"  NOW she asks me if I asked the girls if they wanted to come or not?!?!  Now later tonight, she tells me she is dying, and it is my fault.  "45 days of not eating, that is what God told me it would take to die last night...I'm not eating ever again...that's what he said!  And then I can be with my Mommy and Daddy!"
 
Sometimes in life we bring out the things we fear or hate the most, and sometimes we make those decisions when we are not in our right minds... but then we have to live with the conequences nevertheless.  I know she is an exceptionally smart woman, extremely caring, loving and giving person, I saw that before the BS "discontinuation syndrome" kicked in.  The drugs just won't let that come out.  These drugs should not have a black box warning by the FDA, they should have a black Skull and Cross Bones warning!!!!  And ALL prescribing physicians of these drugs should be REQUIRED to go on them for a period of time and then withdraw!!  IMHO...  I will repost to this blog in 45 days....... 😳😒

Share this post


Link to post
TeaBea

Wow, EagleDoc.  She's lucky she has you in her life--someone who figured out what was going on with the meds.  I can't imagine how hard it is for her, having been medicated for half her life.  

 

We need more doctors to become aware of the potential horrors of these psych meds.  I agree with you--the prescribers should be required to do a trial of them.....if they're "so safe" and all.  Ha.

 

Good luck to you both!  I looks forward to your update, hopefully filled with some good news....

Share this post


Link to post
EagleDoc

Thanks for the support and vote of confidence TeaBea!!  Sorry for the earlier than planned update, but a lot has happened in the two days since my last post, some bad, but some VERY good, and it is cathartic for me to post it here.  Update:  She got frustrated two days ago and put ALL her remaining Zoloft and the 10mg Prozac tablets in a Tupperware bowl full of water.  So much for the planned Prozac transition and slow taper.  😒  Pinned a particularly NASTY note to me on the side with an unused needle and syringe full of Zofran for her nausea in it, and wrote that she "wasn't going to take any of these brain poisons ever again!!"  She was especially nasty and violent for the next two days, destroyed a 40" flat screen LCD TV in the breakfast/kitchen area and made me put a key locking door handle on the spare bedroom so she could have a "safe space".  Apparently, I didn't do this quickly enough because she called 911 on me for trying to put the new locking handle on and having the door open to do it, and I was accused of "being drunk" after having one drink with a friend/patient who just had major cervical spine surgery a few days ago on my way home.  I don't think even Harry Houdini could have put the door handles on both sides and inserted the screws through it to secure it from the OUTSIDE with the door CLOSED!!!  They had already been out once for the neighbors reporting hearing sobbing from the window of the spare bedroom.  I told them when they arrived that time she had complex PTSD and was withdrawing from SSRI's and had barricaded herself inside the spare bedroom with furniture;  they didn't know what SSRI's were, but understood the PTSD part and that she was "off her meds".  I led them upstairs to the spare bedroom door and they knocked and asked "what's the matter?  Are you ok?"  To which she screamed through the  door, "I have complex PTSD and I am going through SSRI discontinuation syndrome", through the sobs and tears.  Satisfied with the matching responses and that all was safe, they left.  Two cars responded this time to the 911 call.  While I chatted with the back up officer about PTSD and SSRI Discontinuaion Syndrome outside, which he seemed to understand, the lead responding officer went inside and asked her what was the matter.  After observing her trying to put the door handle on and fumbling miserably in her uncoordinated "brain fog", he came downstairs and reported what he had observed.  He told me "She's ******* crazy!  But we can't MAKE her take her meds!  Good luck!  Do me and yourself a favor, just don't go upstairs tonight and sleep downstairs for me".  To which I wholeheartedly agreed!  So I slept in the reclining Sharper Image massage chair wrapped in a blanket by the fireplace.  She took over the Master bedroom and locked me out, but put my clean scrubs, underwear, socks and toilitries outside the door.  I put the locking door handle on the next morning while she was asleep.  I had two friends come over to move the "hideous" (her word) hide-a-bed living room sofa and two other 1880 Danish antique sofas in another spare room and two matching chairs that I was storing there as my divorce was not yet final and my THREE 10x20 foot storage units were already filled to capacity.  I had to rent another 10x10 foot storage unit.  I also put all my storage boxes of vintage Catalina Island pottery, the Baccarat crystal, the Lladro and Wegewood china, and the Royal Daulton mug and a David Winters' cottage collections, as well as my prized 9 string guitar for safe keeping.  

 

I didn't even change clothes the next morning.  I turned my scrubs inside out, shaved, brushed my teeth, put on deodorant and cologne, all in the spare hallway bathroom.  As she calls it, I took a "stripper's shower".  My hair was fine, as I had slept upright in the massage chair.  I also had a friend come over, the recently retired Western U.S. Director of the D.E.A., and help me box up the replacement 65" 4K curved screen LED UHDTV and take it out of harm's way to my new storage unit, along with my artist proof Leroy Neiman print of John Lennon with the words to the song "Imagine" on it.  How ironic.  She texted me ALL day during periods of wakefulness, profane, threatening, distraught, suicidal and violent texts.  I thought she was getting my responses, but apparently there was quite a delay and though I thought she was responding to my texts, I later learned she was just rambling and "ranting".  Then last night after sleeping most of the day, day three off of all SSRIs, she awoke and said she felt like the "fog was beginning to lift", but was still having a problem with depth perception.  She texted me when I was coming home?  She then texted me "I don't know who you had here yesterday to move the sofas out, but they broke my plants and half my **** is missing!!"  Well, I knew that I had protected the plants, so didn't know what she was taliking about.  And I knew my D.E.A. buddy and my handyman friend with his utility truck were well trusted friends and wouldn't have taken anything, plus I was there helping, supervising, moving stuff around and protecting the plants!  I told her I was going to the True Value hardware store to buy some plywood and get some shelves made for her patio Home Depot gardening storage shed and asked "or would you rather me come home first?"  Seems like the only thing that relaxes her is gardening.  God, do we have a lot of plants lately!  We can't go to Home Depot or Lowe's without getting at LEAST six more!!  We could open a fricken' nursery!! 😂.  I came straight home instead.  Turns out, the "half her ****" that was missing, was some PVC pipe she was going to make strawberry plant self watering planters with.  The 4" and 6" diameter planter pieces were standing up right by the sliding glass door to the back patio.  I asked her what she was talking about?  She said "the 3/4" pipe for the INSIDE of the planters!!"  I found all ten of the 5 foot pieces, just outside the sliding door, around the corner, on the patio, right where she had put them last week.  I also found the one dead leaf that had fallen off the "broken" Peace plant.  I threw it away.  Satisfied that the "half her ****" was now accounted for, she calmed down and drank some Gatorade G2.  Then she asked for a Zofran shot and to go to the furniture store to get a replacement sofa sectional!!  Now I was excited!!  Then she asked me "what's this text about going to the hardware store first or coming home first?"  I told her I had sent that text 45 minutes ago!  She actually got dressed and got out of the house for the first time in a week!!  We went first to the True Value hardware store.  As it was close to closing time, I was going to just go in, get the lumber, leave the plans for the shelves, have them cut them and pick them up in the morning then go to the furniture store.  I left her in the car with the engine running.  Remember I said there was a significant delay in her receiving the text messages?  Well, apparently ALL of my 3 and 4 hour old "responses" to her violent, threatening "ranting" texts to me, suddenly started FLOODING IN!!  While discussing the plans for the shelves with the hardware store guy, I suddenly get a text: "What the **** are you attacking me for now?  I'm sitting here in the car minding my own ******* business.  I'm calling an Uber.  **** YOU."  I ran outside as she was exiting the vehicle.  I asked what she was talking about?  She said she was getting a FLOOD of texts from me, one right after the other, the same ones where I thought I was responding to her "ranting" texts that I thought were responses to HER texts from 3 and 4 hours ago!!  I said that they were the delayed texts from much earlier in the day, reminding her that she had JUST NOW gotten the text question about me coming straight home.  This sunk in.  Thankfully, most all of my latter texts were more understanding and loving, rather than the first few defensive texts early on.  In them I told her I loved her, felt for her condition and what she was going through, and vowed to keep helping her get through this nightmare.  The hardware guy quickly made my shelves in less than five minutes.  She got back into the car and we went next door to the Carl's Jr., but they apparently no longer serve "curly fries" which she insisted on.  I backed out of that order line, forcing two cars behind me to also back up so I could get out of line.  I went next door to the dual order lane drive through McDonalds. There was no one else in either line, and no one in front of us.  She ordered some "comfort food", consisting of French fries and a vanilla shake.  Having not eaten all day, I got a Big Mac and a filet of fish sandwich.   I used to weigh 160 lbs, but since this tapering I am now only 144 lbs., at 6' 1".  We paid and got to the pickup window.  Now there was ONE car just behind us.  The server handed me the drinks and in usual customary McDonalds' form, asked me to "pull forward and wait for your order".  I responded:  1) there was no one else in EITHER lane when we pulled up, 2) there was only one car behind us now and 3) it was only the two STANDARD order sandwiches and fries we were waiting for!  My fiancé then piped up "and there's a sick passenger in the car!!"  The server quickly went to the back, grabbed our food bag and nearly threw it at us.  I cautiously ate my Filet of Fish first, trying to guess which sandwich they had probably spit on.  😳😒. We both mused, "why would you have us pull forward when the food was ready in less than 10 seconds?"  So off to the furniture store we went.  On the way, she complained "They must have used some Strawberry in this shake, I just bit down on two Strawberry seeds!!!"  Of course they did, it's a world wide conspiracy to make her miserable.

 

We had just bought two Sleigh beds from this store the week before from a very nice and professional Arabic salesman, totaling nearly $3,000, one very nice one for our Master bedroom and a very nice one for the guest room for when her daughters come to visit for Christmas.  He wasn't working last night.  Of course not.  Conspiracy I tell you!  Instead, we were RAPIDLY approached by a bubbling, over zealous, anorexic, middle aged sales lady in Spandex Yoga pants and long, teenage girl hair.  She smelled blood in the water!!  Not sure if she was on Meth., but boy could she talk fast!!  My fiancé took an instant, putrid dislike/hatred to this sales lady.  We asked "where is Mohamad?"  That's when we learned he wasn't working last night.  After successfully ditching the sales lady "Shark", we tested several sofas we liked, and brought various "accent pillows" to them to see what matched and what we liked.  We didn't dare doddle too long on any one sofa, lest the Shark swoop in for the kill!!  We must have been a sight!  Me, not showered for two days except for my "stripper's shower" this morning, with unpressed, day two old, wrinkled scrubs, and her, having not bathed for three days, basically in her pajamas.  What they didn't know was that I had $2,000 cash on me and a $3,500 limit on my debit card, ready to buy an expensive sectional TONIGHT!!  We finally found one we both liked, but not any good matching accent pillows.  So I carefully traversed the sales floor, carefully circumnavigating and avoiding the sales force congregation in the center by the coffee machine which the Shark had joined, and approached a quiet Asian man sitting at his computer.  I asked if he was a manager and if he could help us?  I informed him that my fiancé felt very "uncomfortable" with the Shark and if he would help us?  He politely joined us beside our chosen, prize sectional.  We asked about substituting accent pillows?  He informed us they were all sent by the various manufacturers with their respective sofas, so no, we could not substitute the accent pillows.  Disheartened, we left the store, with my fiancé muttering loudly about making her own accent pillows and vowing to come back tomorrow when Mohamad was there.  We didn't get out the door before she asked me to go back in and get the Shark's name, or better yet, her business card, so that she could prepare a scathing Yelp review of her.  I noticed the Asian Manager by the coffee clutch and the glaring look from the Shark as I approached.  I asked her for a business card and was informed she did not have one, but that "her name was Patricia".  As we drove away, we literally felt her visual daggers hitting our car.  God help her Yelp ratings!!

 

The SINGLE saving medication for my fiancé has been her weed.  She's had a medical marijuana card for years.  It calms the nightmares, allows her to sleep, quells the nausea, allows her to concentrate and calms her nerves.  Recently she had bought some highly concentrated "wax" to smoke, but rubbing it on the end of a cigarette "wasted it", as she said and I noticed truthfully it didn't get her THAT high, as I had been led to believe by other partakers it was supposed to.  She asked me to stop by a "Smoke Shop" to get a "bubbler" for "dabbing" the wax.  A quick Google search on my iPhone showed one not two blocks away.  We were met by a very nice young sales gentleman who understood our request and asked us "may I ask you what your price range is?  Because we have them from $50 up to $50,000".  "My God", I thought, WHO would spend $50,000 on a glass Marijuana wax pipe?!?!    ".  Pablo Escobar?!?!  I HAD to see what THAT one looked like!!  It WAS an extremely ornate, hand made glass blown artwork, with a bear sitting on a beehive inside the smoke cooling chamber, like Winnie the Pooh, with TONS of detail and accents with other animals and insects on it, and a very well engineered labyrinth of twists and turns for the smoke to traverse, mystifying and impressing the owner's friends before reaching the smoker's lungs.  I didn't want to spend $50,000, especially with her still in such a clumsy state, dropping and breaking things all the time.  😂  We settled for a simple, nice unit for $80, OF COURSE in the color green, her favorite color.  Getting home, she was anxious to try it.  Like the rest of my rollercoaster life, more so lately, I heard the shrill screams from her that "someone has taken my weed!!  I had 7 or 8 containers of it right down here in this drawer below the fish tank!!  And some was hidden in the couch!!  You need to figure out which one of your friends took it, or go to the storage unit RIGHT NOW and check the couch and bring me my weed!!"  Well, the drawer was of course empty.  The Storage unit was already closed for entry at 9:00, it now being 9:30.  I went upstairs, much to her protestations that she had "already looked everywhere upstairs!!...It is ALL gone!!!"  I found the small, white gift shop bag with ALL of her weed in it and brought it down to her.  "No!!" she screamed.  "I mean the WAX!!  I had 7 or 8 small containers of wax!!  It's ALL gone!!"  I went back upstairs and looked right next to where I had found the weed, and begin opening the Russian Lacquer boxes I had gotten her at the various Gun shows I had gone to over the last two years.  The largest one was FULL of small, plastic containers of the wax.  I brought it down to her and she was both relieved and excited to try her new bubbler.  We went out to the garage and I smoked a cigar while she tried out the new bubbler.  One hit and she looked like a character in Rembrandt's "The Absynth Drinkers".  Two minutes after the second hit, she suddenly stood up and said "I need to go upstairs to bed!"  30 seconds later I hear a loud "thump", followed nearly instantaneously by loud crying and screaming.  I came inside to find her crumpled on the stairs, bathrobe half off, thongs off and scattered along the floor.  She hadn't made it one step before going down like a sack of potatoes.  "Damn" I thought, "that is some STRONG STUFF!!"  I got her undressed and into bed, where she immediately passed out and began snoring loudly.  I went downstairs and made myself my first and only drink of the day...at 10:30 last night.  (I had agreed to wait until she went to sleep to having my stress relieving, ONE drink/nightcap).  I went to bed an hour later, but then was awoken by her roaming around the house, sobbing and screaming "I can't find my phone!!!....where is my phone?!?!" about two hours later.  I helped her look for it, but I couldn't find my car keys to see if we left it in there.  It was about 2:30 in the morning.  She kept looking upstairs while I looked downstairs.  Apparently she must have been crying loud enough to bother and concern the neighbors again.  The door bell rang.  I opened it to find the Sheriffs, in full combat regalia standing at my front door.

 

This time three officers came. They asked me "what's going on this time?  Same old discontinuation syndrome thing?" I said Yep! They asked me what was the problem this time?  I replied, "She can't find her phone!".  If this wasn't so depressingly true and so horrible of an experience for us BOTH to be going through, it would make a hilarious, dark comedy!!  You really can't make this **** up!!!  One officer, a nice gentleman with glasses, younger than the others, stayed downstairs with me.  The two older ones went upstairs.  I hoped she had at least put her bathrobe back on, as we both sleep "au natural".  "Glasses" seemed to understand me as I rambled on about the horrors of PTSD, SSRI's and "Discontinuation Syndrome", or at least he pretended to and tolerated me.  The officers' voices were muffled, all I could hear coming from upstairs was her screaming to them, "I CAN'T FIND MY PHONE!!!".  It was very difficult for me to control my laughter!!  Anyways, I went back to sleep and didn't get up until 9:30 this morning.  I awoke to thankfully find a half eaten Chicken Pot Pie, an empty Jello container and an empty bottle of G2.  The Mac and Cheese I made her at 3:30 a.m. apparently had gotten too cold and was dumped out in the kitchen sink.  I thought it was Friday and was late to the office.  I signed into my server via GoToMYPC to check the schedule, to see when the first patient was scheduled.  I kept refreshing the daily schedule to "Today", but it kept popping up "Saturday", with an empty schedule.  I did it three times before checking my watch and seeing it was in fact, Saturday, the 16th.  Forget TGIF!!  Thank God for Saturday's!!!  It's now 3:30 in the afternoon.  I have spent nearly four hours composing and proofreading this blog entry.  She is still asleep.  I have left Jello and G2 on her bedside table, but she didn't want her Zofran shot this morning, I guess that is a good sign.  Sooner or later I'm going to have to take a shower, finish the gardening shed shelves, get her up and fed/watered, and get off to the sofa store....we have a date with Mohamad!!! 😂😂😂. 

 

Last night she said on the way to the hardware store while studying her phone, "I REALLY wish I could have my girls here for Christmas after all...But now there's no flights available!!!"  (I KNEW she was going to change her mind!!  That's why I didn't cancel the tickets in the first place, and HAD to tell her the "white lie" that I HAD cancelled them, which apparently negated ALL built up trust in me, which was gained difficultly with her complex PTSD).  I told her, "if you really want your girls here for Christmas, text them and ask them if they still can come if (Me) could get it arranged"?  I don't know the response yet, but there are in fact, ZERO seats left on the flights arriving Christmas Day, AT LEAST AS FAR AS SHE KNOWS!!! 😂😂😂😉😉😉

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Cnp412

Does anyone know how long withdrawal side effects from prozac particularly last with someone is going through the personality changes.. Like pushing there spouse away, promiscuity, distorted , events, and just hurtful and emotionless

Share this post


Link to post
EagleDoc

Cnp412, Prozac has one of the longest half lives of all the SSRI's, about 4-6 days, so SUPPOSEDLY one of the "gentlest" discontinuation syndromes.  That being said, a VERY slow taper, like over several months is still advised by most commenters.  The behaviors, violent outbursts, emotional disconnect are all very well documented.  My S.O. Never switched over from Zoloft to Prozac, wanted all the "brain poisons" out of her system as quickly as possible.  She is a nightmare, read my blogs!

Share this post


Link to post
Juan

Hello @EagleDoc, what's new?

oh my, you're a very good story teller, how long have you been together? Sounds like you love her very much to put up with her struggles.

 

Hey @zeeheather, how are you doing?

I am sorry for your situation, let's hope you both can be together and happy soon again.

 

Share this post


Link to post
zeeheather
8 minutes ago, Juan said:

.Hey @zeeheather, how are you doing?

I am sorry for your situation, let's hope you both can be together and happy soon again.

 

 

Hi Juan, thank you for asking. 

 

I’ve had a rough couple of days. I went about a week where I was very hopeful and i was getting out to the gym everyday, Christmas shopping, eating properly. 

I recently just started feeling down again, I guess I got ahead of myself and hoped that during his taper, he might have started feeling something towards me again. 

He and I talk every 3 or 4 days (I text him to see how he’s doing) One of our last texts he said “Nothing has changed on my end, so space is best right now.” But then later that night said “It’s not so much that I need space, I just don’t want to give you the wrong impression or lead you on. I don’t want to put you through anymore crap.” 

So I was confused, because I thought “He’s being nice and empathetic, maybe it wasn’t the pills and he really just doesn’t love me anymore.” That sent me in a downward spiral. Lost hope. 

 

Good news is that today he took his last Paxil pill! (Well at least he said on Monday that today is his last day on them, I’m trusting that he’s telling the truth. I believe him)

 

So now I’m playing the waiting game. Giving him space. He leaves for a one week Christmas vacation with his family on Christmas Eve. So at least I know he’s in good hands and safe while he goes through withdrawals. 

 

He is still taking Wellbutrin, has been for about a week, to help him wean off of the Paxil and so he’s on something while flying (anxiety/panic attacks on planes). 

His plan is still to wean off that when he returns home. 

 

So im glad he’s being nice to me, even if he still doesn’t feel love. Just hoping that he’ll realize soon what happened. Crossing my fingers. 

 

Thank you again for asking. 

Share this post


Link to post
zeeheather

People who have been on these drugs, then come off of them. Do you just slowly start to have feelings for your partners again, over days/weeks? Or do you wake up one day and feel love for them?

I feel like I've lost all hope for my boyfriend. He took his last dose of Paxil a week ago, was only on SSRIs for 3 months. He was put on Wellbutrin to help with his Paxil taper, which is supposed to increase dopamine levels. But nothing has changed. He said he's doing great, but still feels nothing towards me. 

I'm started to lose hope that it was the drugs, maybe he just stopped loving me?

Share this post


Link to post
dewayne76

Zeeheather, I'm sorry to hear. My ex wife and I were married for 11 years. Last 5-6 years were the best. We were doing great, sold land and hot rods (show cars), started a business, had a 3 yo daughter, felt love for one another like we'd never felt before. She was RX'd Citalopram (20mg) and was on them for just under 3 months I think. Of course hypomania etc set in and went through all that. Now she's "that" crazy church lady that thinks God has given her everything. She is a completely different person. Laughs differently, talks differently, completely different interests, WAY different taste in men... She ALLEGEDLY quit taking "happy pills" for a few years now, but 1. I really don't believe her. 2. If she had quit, she's not showing any signs of the old her. She still thinks everything she done is perfectly fine and God has told her that she's still going to heaven.... She no longer takes care of herself either, always wearing crappy homemade pants that look horrible, slicks her hair to one side like a balding nerd guy (had beautiful long hair prior, now it's barely more than a crew cut). 

Point is this, simply that, your best friend? Your partner? Is probably gone forever. I hate to say it, but you know, I was in your shoes for a very long time.... I gave up and moved on. Hope you can to, for your sake. Good luck.  (pardon if this is garbage english / grammar, lol, it's 1:30 am here and I'm tired...)

Share this post


Link to post
zeeheather

Hi dewayne76, thank you for your response. Sorry to hear what you’ve been through. I do appreciate your message, but I was hoping for messages of hope. 

 

My boyfriend is now a week and half off of Paxil, still on Wellbutrin and could not love me less. 

 

He’s out at a bar tonight for NYE, adding random girls onto his social media (god knows what else), meanwhile I spent it crying in a bathroom at a friend of a friend’s house. 

 

I’ve never been this depressed and destroyed. He’s ripped my heart out and I don’t know why. What did I do wrong? 

 

I miss him, but can’t handle this hurt anymore. 

Share this post


Link to post
TeaBea

Zeeheather.... Right now you are really hurt and want him back, no matter what.  I've been there!  I know how it is.  BUT, if you're young enough....you're not yet married....no kids involved....my best advice to you is to just let it be.  If it IS meant to be that the two of you will get back together, it'll happen.  If not and you force it with your great desire, it might not work out that great for you.  His problems will not automatically go away some day--whatever it was that caused him to need these meds in the first place will still exist and cause him issues.  Coming off all the meds will likely increase those previous issues.  My poor husband's anxiety is so great now.

 

Here's what I believe.... I think we CAN get what we want if our desire is great enough, BUT, if it's not in your best interest, it will come at a "price"....it might be difficult.  Have you ever heard, "be careful little girl what you wish?  You might just get it...."?  

 

There is N.O.T.H.I.N.G. in this world you can do to change HIS mind about anything.  No amount of wishing it so, no amount of showing him SSRI story after story.... it's all in his ball-park when it comes to his mind being messed up by these meds.  You need to look out for yourself.  Find a way to be at peace with whatever happens.  Actually, plan for it to NOT happen and get on with your life.  Living a happy life without trying to connect "cords" to him will actually make you more "attractive" to him.  

 

My husband never got to the point of moving out or anything.  And during the worst days I stayed despite not always wanting to...somedays I really wanted out, but 25 yrs of marriage and commitment kept me there.  That "for better or for worse, in sickness and in health" part.  I never stopped loving him or anything, but the thought of another 25 yrs like what we were living at the time made me more miserable than I ever imagined being.  If I were in my 20s and looking at 50 yrs with that same man I was not yet married to?  I'd run the other way!   I'm sorry, but that's my honest opinion.  We just had our 30th anniversary the other day, and neither of us said anything to the other.  We weren't feeling the "happy" part this holiday season.  There's still ups and downs and he's essentially OFF any medication.  So, even when you have a happy ending with these meds, the whole experience sometimes leads to other problems.  My suppressed anger over those lost years leaves me with little patience for regular marital stuff (and so many times, I'm now the problem!).

 

If he's out carousing around and doing "whatever", you have to ask yourself if you're going to be able to let that go if he comes back to you....to never hold it over his head when you argue or you feel you can't trust him.  A lifetime is a LONG time.  

 

I wish you both the best....

T

Share this post


Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.