Sonia009: Citalopram discontinuation/reinstatement

[Mamgu]

Hi Sonia, I've just been catching up on your thread, so sad about your dog.  I totally get how horrible it is when they aren't well, my dog gets episodes of being sick a lot and it's difficult to know how to make him feel better.  He also went to the vet recently to have his teeth descaled and polished, that involved a general anaesthetic.  Poor chap was all off-kilter for a day or two afterwards 😞 Like you, I felt my symptoms ramp up when my dog was unwell/wobbly, it's not surprising I suppose but the last thing you need is for the WD to increase at times like that.  Just a thought, when you do get round to spraying the house, you may want to consider going out for an hour or so, there are nasty chemicals in those sprays and it might impact the WDs.  Not sure if they will but might be good to be cautious?

 

Interesting you say you feel anxious when showering; whilst I don't get anxious or have panic attacks, I notice my sense of walking on ice....or stepping off an escalator...whatever it is I can't find the words...anyway, it increases, I have to steady myself by leaning on the wall.  I think it's the lifting of my head to rinse the shampoo off, it's exactly the same as when walking and I look left and right before crossing a road.  Vagus nerve sensitivity perhaps? I have to say I totally love your strategy for managing your anxiety in that situation, pure genius 🙂

 

[Sonia009]

1 hour ago, Mamgu said:

Hi Sonia, I've just been catching up on your thread, so sad about your dog.  I totally get how horrible it is when they aren't well, my dog gets episodes of being sick a lot and it's difficult to know how to make him feel better.  He also went to the vet recently to have his teeth descaled and polished, that involved a general anaesthetic.  Poor chap was all off-kilter for a day or two afterwards 😞 Like you, I felt my symptoms ramp up when my dog was unwell/wobbly, it's not surprising I suppose but the last thing you need is for the WD to increase at times like that.  Just a thought, when you do get round to spraying the house, you may want to consider going out for an hour or so, there are nasty chemicals in those sprays and it might impact the WDs.  Not sure if they will but might be good to be cautious?

 

Interesting you say you feel anxious when showering; whilst I don't get anxious or have panic attacks, I notice my sense of walking on ice....or stepping off an escalator...whatever it is I can't find the words...anyway, it increases, I have to steady myself by leaning on the wall.  I think it's the lifting of my head to rinse the shampoo off, it's exactly the same as when walking and I look left and right before crossing a road.  Vagus nerve sensitivity perhaps? I have to say I totally love your strategy for managing your anxiety in that situation, pure genius 🙂

 

1 hour ago, Mamgu said:

Hi Sonia, I've just been catching up on your thread, so sad about your dog.  I totally get how horrible it is when they aren't well, my dog gets episodes of being sick a lot and it's difficult to know how to make him feel better.  He also went to the vet recently to have his teeth descaled and polished, that involved a general anaesthetic.  Poor chap was all off-kilter for a day or two afterwards 😞 Like you, I felt my symptoms ramp up when my dog was unwell/wobbly, it's not surprising I suppose but the last thing you need is for the WD to increase at times like that.  Just a thought, when you do get round to spraying the house, you may want to consider going out for an hour or so, there are nasty chemicals in those sprays and it might impact the WDs.  Not sure if they will but might be good to be cautious?

 

Interesting you say you feel anxious when showering; whilst I don't get anxious or have panic attacks, I notice my sense of walking on ice....or stepping off an escalator...whatever it is I can't find the words...anyway, it increases, I have to steady myself by leaning on the wall.  I think it's the lifting of my head to rinse the shampoo off, it's exactly the same as when walking and I look left and right before crossing a road.  Vagus nerve sensitivity perhaps? I have to say I totally love your strategy for managing your anxiety in that situation, pure genius 🙂

@Mamgu Hi Mamgu, nice to hear from you.  I just took my dog for a walk, he was reluctant to go but ok once he started going. He hasn't eaten anything though, second day today, which worries me. He's still quiet. Honestly they are a worry aren't they. I hope your little one is doing ok now after visiting the vet dentist. What an ordeal but he's better for it no doubt. Thanks for the tip about the spray. Luckily we are almost carpet free in our house, just the stairs and a couple of rugs to spray and wherever he hangs about which is usually my bed lol. Getting new bedding too.

That motion feeling I get is like you describe, I wondered if it was an anxiety thing. Could be what you said though. I had it before when I ct from Citalopram a few years ago. I'm just over two weeks since my last drop so that could be it.  My legs felt jelly like whilst out walking this morning. 

Yeah the shower thing lol. I've been Sandra Bullock, Meg Ryan and others, steering away from being Janet Leigh.😂

My boy is on the bedroom window ledge now, just looking around, he loves that. I hope he picks up otherwise it will be another vet visit. Next time a different vet though. I wasn't very impressed with her, she took his temperature, weighed him but then forget how much he weighed, prescribed probiotics and flea and worming tablets and charged £130.00. She didn't look in his ears or mouth or listen to his heart. She did try to sell more insurance. I would have felt more at ease if she had given him a proper examination. Ah well! I hope things improve for you and your dog. Best wishes.😊🙏

[Sonia009]

Took my dog to a different vet practice this am, now on steroids for licking himself below a lot. Much better vet this time. I, however, felt like I was in a bubble, listening to her talk and wishing she would stop, I couldn't wait to leave even though I was grateful for taking the time to explain things. (He's otherwise fine now).  I'm home now and my head feels weird, muzzy, feel a bit wobbly, tired. I guess it's the drop in dosage 25 days ago and the change of brand and I'm still adjusting. Getting weird dreams, thoughts and brain zaps again too. I think I will hold at 0.4mg until I feel substantially recovered this time. Best wishes to you all out there who are suffering.🙏😊

[mariamisery]

@Sonia009 Hi. I was looking for post you sent on how to get to my page and could not find it. Can you please tell me again on how to get there. I post so seldom. I need to ask moderators questions.  When asking questions do I just post and individuals will answer or do I need to put their individual name in? I hope you are getting better! Thanks!!!

[Kat66]

How are you doing @Sonia009?

[Sonia009]

23 minutes ago, Kat66 said:

How are you doing @Sonia009?

@Kat66 Hi Kat, thanks for asking, not great, migraine today, dizzy muzzy feeling. Trying to carry on as I would normally, but pacing myself. Dreams, brain zaps are back, ruminating thoughts, been like this for a month now since my last reduction and brand change. Picked up my script today and yet another brand change.😏 How are you?

 

 

[Kat66]

Aaaargh hang in there Sonia and get through each day. Every day’s closer to healing. I’m completely devoid of emotions except anger. I just keep telling myself ‘it’s not me it’s the drugs’ over and over. That helps!

 

[Kat66]

How are you @Sonia009? 

[Sonia009]

@Kat66 Hi Kat, much the same unfortunately. I seem to feel exhausted after every thing I do. I made a pie this morning and it did me in. Visited my mother later but couldn't stay for long. Back on my bed at the moment. How about you, any change?

[Kat66]

@Sonia009 I’m so sorry things haven’t changed much, same for me really. God I wish there was a fast forward button on this thing!! When do you think you might make another cut? I won’t be doing so for another couple of months. 
x

[Sonia009]

@Kat66 Hi Kat, yeah I know what you mean. I am going to wait until these weird symptoms ease up before making another cut. If I can get back to some sort of normality I will hold for a while even if it's until after Christmas. I've had a couple of poor Christmases and am hoping for a better one this year. Knowing how long it takes to stabilise in between cuts is really offputting. I'm almost six weeks on this last reduction and still getting withdrawal symptoms, some new ones too. It's true what they say about it being harder to come off the lower doses. I didn't get this many symptoms jumping from 10 mg to 5 mg. Sorry you are still suffering. x

[Kat66]

Yeah Christmas is tough in WD, added pressure to be ‘normal’ and ‘functioning’ etc etc. Do you have a rough timescale of when you’d like to be off altogether? I wonder if it might help to have that as a goal, or not? 
what sorts of things, if anything, help you get through your days? Are you working?

[Sonia009]

1 hour ago, Kat66 said:

Yeah Christmas is tough in WD, added pressure to be ‘normal’ and ‘functioning’ etc etc. Do you have a rough timescale of when you’d like to be off altogether? I wonder if it might help to have that as a goal, or not? 
what sorts of things, if anything, help you get through your days? Are you working?

@Kat66 Hi Kat, I'm not working, I took voluntary redundancy from the college where I worked. I'm done with work thank goodness, I could never hold down a job with this withdrawal rollercoaster in any case. I hadn't really thought about an end date, not sure if it would help, it probably wouldn't work out for me if I did. I would be happy just to stabilise right now. I will take things much slower when I do stabilise. I just do what needs to be done at home but I have to pace myself (I'm quite house proud), walk my dog when I can, knit a lot, crossword puzzles, colouring, listen to music and watch films on my tablet. I cannot face a large tv screen like I used to. I have an elderly mother to think of and a husband who had a TIA two years ago and is going through withdrawal himself. He was given Sertraline then Citalopram following his TIA but stopped both cold turkey. It's been five months for him. He has diabetes and insomnia to add to the mix. Thankfully though he can drive, I am not ready to drive yet but can't wait to get behind the wheel again. My daughter lives a half hour drive from me but she works away a lot. How do you pass the time, any hobbies?

[Kat66]

Oh my goodness you have a husband going through WD too? That must be so hard. How’s his WD journey going?

You have a lot going on!

 

I still work part time in a thankfully low-ish stress job. With the ups and downs of WD I couldn’t cope with anything more. Would you like to return to work at some point or is that definitely it?

 

I try to distract as much as possible but apathy and anhedonia prevent me from getting back into the kinds of things that used to give me pleasure. Gardening, art, and creating music are my main hobbies, but I struggle to get the motivation to do much of any of those. I exercise a lot, it’s one of the very few things that really helps me distract from this sh*t storm. Lots of tv gets watched, to pass the time. I’ve just started colouring myself too, which feels weird as I used to be a professional illustrator 😢
 

Yes, it would be really good to stabilise, that would mean it would be ok to reduce the dose slightly, one step nearer to being drug free.

 

 

[Sonia009]

@Kat66 Yes he is going through withdrawal but he won't accept it or even talk about it. He cannot believe it is still withdrawal after five months and he won't read up on it or take telling and that makes me feel very lonely because I cannot discuss it with him. He gets dizziness, weakness and tiredness, itching, random pains, neck and shoulder aches and more but he doesn't sleep at night either so that exacerbates his symptoms. He manages a few hours sleep in the mornings. He's ok driving though, he feels better driving which is weird but I'm thankful for that. He blames his symptoms on his TIA but he has made a good recovery from that. He has type 2 diabetes also and this is controlled. I know some symptoms he has can be attributed to his diabetes, insomnia and TIA but most are so similar to mine and others on this site. Furthermore, some of his symptoms only developed after stopping his ssri's.

I have finished work now and won't be going back, I want to do so much when I recover because this withdrawal has taken up so much of my life and my family have suffered because of it. I need to do more for my mother but am limited at the moment. We used to enjoy short holidays together, shopping trips etc but all of that has stopped. My daughter isn't a worry because she is so independent and is committed to her work.

It seems you have many interests to distract you from your symptoms which is great, that must be very helpful. It's good that you can exercise a lot too, I can manage a dog walk and housework but no more than that. I have to rest after doing anything strenuous right now. I hope things improve for you soon. Good to keep in touch. Take care x.

[Sonia009]

Hi, I just had a tooth out and feeling weak, tired almost faint like. My heart was thumping there, still is, skipping beats, very anxious although the dentist wasn't aware.  First time with this dentist. Advised to take things easy for remainder of day. It will probably settle, just got myself in a bit of a state going.  Anyone else experienced this? Thanks. 

[BaccatePlayer]

9 minutes ago, Sonia009 said:

Anyone else experienced this?

You mean the set of symptoms you mentioned, having tooth out during withdrawal, or an anxious reaction after visiting new doctor? For the symptoms I can relate to and they're very normal during recovery. Really common set of anxiety alerts. As for tooth removal, I haven't gone through it, but I can tell you these procedures can evoke a significant trigger to your nervous system. If I experienced significant reaction to having a small piece of wood removed from finger, then going for dentist can definitelly play on your limbic mind too and likely to a bigger extent. Visiting new specialist can also be triggering, we have some health/med anxiety underneath from the trauma, it's not unusual for symptoms to hide in the background and alarmingly strike back whenever the topic of health or body sensations is started, so try not to worry about it. Anxiety is always there where you're starting to look for it. This procedure is not dangerous, so it's only your CNS that's having a circus. It will get better, just keep neutralizing this situation in your mind. No worrying, no reading about it, just rest and remember you're fine.

[Kat66]

@Sonia009 I wonder why your husband won't engage with talking/reading about WD? Does he know you are going through it?

 

Yes, I hate the fact that WD has robbed us all of so much of life! It's like we're living half-lives!

 

I hope you recover from your tooth extraction soon - WD can affect every aspect of life - take it gently for the rest of the day x

[Sonia009]

@BaccatePlayer Thank you for your reassuring reply, as always. I'm ok, really tired now, but yes you're right, they are all anxiety related symptoms. My bp went up a bit though, I've just eaten so hopefully it will go back down. 

How are you, are you any better?

[Sonia009]

13 minutes ago, Kat66 said:

@Sonia009 I wonder why your husband won't engage with talking/reading about WD? Does he know you are going through it?

 

Yes, I hate the fact that WD has robbed us all of so much of life! It's like we're living half-lives!

 

I hope you recover from your tooth extraction soon - WD can affect every aspect of life - take it gently for the rest of the day x

@Kat66 Hi Kat, yes he knows that I am having symptoms, I just keep telling him that I know it's withdrawal. He just can't face it, doesn't want to hear anything about it. He went to see his doctor today (re his insomnia and aches and pains) who told him that after five months ct, the Sertraline and Citalopram would have long gone from his system😏. He believes the doctor. Thanks for your good wishes.❤ Hope you are feeling a little better? x

[Kat66]

Out of his system by now? Oh do me a favour! Bl**dy doctors!!! I hope he heals from this nightmare eventually.

 

I am in a mini window today which - as we all know - probably won't last long but hey, I wasn't expecting it so I'll 'enjoy' it while it lasts

[BaccatePlayer]

35 minutes ago, Sonia009 said:

@BaccatePlayer Thank you for your reassuring reply, as always. I'm ok, really tired now, but yes you're right, they are all anxiety related symptoms. My bp went up a bit though, I've just eaten so hopefully it will go back down. 

How are you, are you any better?

Actually it does look a bit more promising. The anxiety is no longer physically painful, panic attacks stopped two weeks ago and my sleep along with eating improved. I still get intense DP/DR, really brutal balance issues (I was at Castorama and Auchan, and had to hold onto things) and some wierd sensations, but it's definitelly not as bad as a month ago. Just worried that my substance and food phobia will remain there for long. Happy that you recomposed after a moment of doubt.

[Sonia009]

1 hour ago, Kat66 said:

Out of his system by now? Oh do me a favour! Bl**dy doctors!!! I hope he heals from this nightmare eventually.

 

I am in a mini window today which - as we all know - probably won't last long but hey, I wasn't expecting it so I'll 'enjoy' it while it lasts

@Kat66 That's great news Kat, any window is good and it's a sign of improvement. Enjoy it while it lasts, hopefully it will be a permanent one for you. x 😊

[Mamgu]

If you think about it Sonia, having a tooth extracted is going to stress out anyone, let alone someone going through withdrawal horrors.  You're lying on your back in a very vulnerable position and a stranger is performing a procedure that involves force and physical trauma. It's natural to be apprehensive, even though you know it's not hurting at the time, it's the thought of what they are doing to you that can set off all sorts of fight/flight/freeze responses.

 

I was shaky after my extraction earlier this year but took some arnica and settled down soon enough.  Though I went straight back to work so it took my mind from things.  The worse of it is the resultant gap is the perfect size to trap chickpeas or hazelnuts (both of which I eat a fair few of) 😂

 

So, be extra kind to yourself these next couple of days and take things easy xx

[Sonia009]

@Mamgu Hi, thanks Mamgu, you brought a smile to my face, I'll try to avoid peanuts. I'm feeling ok at the moment, no pain, such a relief, in fairness I only felt the injections. The  problem now is I have to wait a few months before having a bridge fitted. Not looking forward to that either lol. Hope you're continuing to make good progress. It's always good to hear from you. All the best x😊

 

[Sonia009]

13 hours ago, BaccatePlayer said:

Actually it does look a bit more promising. The anxiety is no longer physically painful, panic attacks stopped two weeks ago and my sleep along with eating improved. I still get intense DP/DR, really brutal balance issues (I was at Castorama and Auchan, and had to hold onto things) and some wierd sensations, but it's definitelly not as bad as a month ago. Just worried that my substance and food phobia will remain there for long. Happy that you recomposed after a moment of doubt.

@BaccatePlayer Hi, I thought I replied to your post yesterday but I can see that it didn't go through? I was just thinking how much better you sound, more positive, back to your usual self, it's so good you being here. You seem to be making good progress, symptoms are diminishing, the others will too in time. I can't help but wonder ( hope I'm not being presumptuous) if you could turn your talent into a career such as therapist, counsellor, nursing etc or more. You certainly have a unique gift. Thank you so much for all you do.🙏😊

[BaccatePlayer]

3 hours ago, Sonia009 said:

@BaccatePlayer Hi, I thought I replied to your post yesterday but I can see that it didn't go through? I was just thinking how much better you sound, more positive, back to your usual self, it's so good you being here. You seem to be making good progress, symptoms are diminishing, the others will too in time. I can't help but wonder ( hope I'm not being presumptuous) if you could turn your talent into a career such as therapist, counsellor, nursing etc or more. You certainly have a unique gift. Thank you so much for all you do.🙏😊

Yes, it looks like the response you wrote has not been posted. I sometimes have this glitch when I hit "Submit Reply" and it freezes without posting. It seems I was in a strong, traumatic shock from my symptoms getting so severe last month. That blend of panic attacks and DP/DR really made me absent, overshadowing everything, I wasn't myself and it was like altered state of mind. Whenever we're in such hole that appears to have no escape route, only tightening claws; it's crucial to just stop digging further. Maybe I got into a trap of scanning my symptoms, but I forced ignoring these sensations, no matter how strong with what I'd normally do or say. Anxiety can push us so far that we lose control over our thoughts. I didn't sleep almost whole night, but I can tell that distinguishing withdrawal processes from real thoughts is a habbit that we need to foster. What we don't have much impact on, we better just leave in the background. I really appreciate your insight, such idea was not considered by me before because I always struggled with face-to-face contact. I get very bitter and provocative easily, acting out on my insecurities. My sister even refuses to have me nearby cause she's ashamed of my behavior. Maybe it looks different online, but my social skills are complete mess in real life. I'm glad you enjoy my contribution for SA community though. Best wishes for you and your husband!

[Sonia009]

15 hours ago, BaccatePlayer said:

Yes, it looks like the response you wrote has not been posted. I sometimes have this glitch when I hit "Submit Reply" and it freezes without posting. It seems I was in a strong, traumatic shock from my symptoms getting so severe last month. That blend of panic attacks and DP/DR really made me absent, overshadowing everything, I wasn't myself and it was like altered state of mind. Whenever we're in such hole that appears to have no escape route, only tightening claws; it's crucial to just stop digging further. Maybe I got into a trap of scanning my symptoms, but I forced ignoring these sensations, no matter how strong with what I'd normally do or say. Anxiety can push us so far that we lose control over our thoughts. I didn't sleep almost whole night, but I can tell that distinguishing withdrawal processes from real thoughts is a habbit that we need to foster. What we don't have much impact on, we better just leave in the background. I really appreciate your insight, such idea was not considered by me before because I always struggled with face-to-face contact.

 

 

 

 

I get very bitter and provocative easily, acting out on my insecurities. My sister even refuses to have me nearby cause she's ashamed of my behavior. Maybe it looks different online, but my social skills are complete mess in real life. I'm glad you enjoy my contribution for SA community though. Best wishes for you and your husband!  

@BaalZephon

 

[Sonia009]

Hi, so the first day after having my tooth out I woke up with a horrible pressure headache the top of my head, I was much dizzier than normal, blurry vision, stiff neck, I think it must have been a reaction to the anaesthetic used. I rested most of the day just got up to potter around and cook meals.Today I still have a headache, aching eyes, dizziness but not as bad as yesterday. My gum is also hurting today. I have had a tooth out before with no problem (before withdrawal), even went on holiday the same day. Anyway, not expecting replies, just want to record this to keep track and in case it is of use to anyone. Sending healing wishes to everyone suffering. 🙏😊

[Sonia009]

15 hours ago, BaccatePlayer said:

Yes, it looks like the response you wrote has not been posted. I sometimes have this glitch when I hit "Submit Reply" and it freezes without posting. It seems I was in a strong, traumatic shock from my symptoms getting so severe last month. That blend of panic attacks and DP/DR really made me absent, overshadowing everything, I wasn't myself and it was like altered state of mind. Whenever we're in such hole that appears to have no escape route, only tightening claws; it's crucial to just stop digging further. Maybe I got into a trap of scanning my symptoms, but I forced ignoring these sensations, no matter how strong with what I'd normally do or say. Anxiety can push us so far that we lose control over our thoughts. I didn't sleep almost whole night, but I can tell that distinguishing withdrawal processes from real thoughts is a habbit that we need to foster. What we don't have much impact on, we better just leave in the background. I really appreciate your insight, such idea was not considered by me before because I always struggled with face-to-face contact. I get very bitter and provocative easily, acting out on my insecurities. My sister even refuses to have me nearby cause she's ashamed of my behavior. Maybe it looks different online, but my social skills are complete mess in real life. I'm glad you enjoy my contribution for SA community though. Best wishes for you and your husband!

@BaccatePlayer Oh I see, well you're an asset here for sure. Thank you for your kind wishes.🙏😊

[Sonia009]

It's been almost seven weeks since my drop to 0.4 mg Citalopram and almost a week since having a tooth removed and my dizziness has been worse this past week, weird head sensations,  weakness, balance and GI issues, tearful and totally fed up. I think I must have had a reaction to the anaesthetic, also I was on antibiotics a few months before. Perhaps a combination of both. I keep telling myself it's only temporary but I'm finding it hard to believe sometimes. I do what I have to do, cook, clean, visit my mother once a week but not up to doing much more. I did visit my mother twice this weekend because she has sciatica and because of roadworks these were two hourly round trips, it didn't help. It somehow feels better writing it down, getting it off my chest. I pray we all find relief soon. Best wishes all.🙏😊

[sunnysideup69]

Hi Sonia009, long time no speak.

Just saw your update as I'm mooching here. 

I would suggest that your tooth extraction definitely played a big part in your symptoms. It's the bleepin' anaesthetic. Had a tooth extracted in early 2023 and felt absolutely awful for a good couple of weeks after, full on wave, after having no real waves for ages. It'll go again, you know it will.

 

Take it easy.

Xxx

[Sonia009]

4 minutes ago, sunnysideup69 said:

Hi Sonia009, long time no speak.

Just saw your update as I'm mooching here. 

I would suggest that your tooth extraction definitely played a big part in your symptoms. It's the bleepin' anaesthetic. Had a tooth extracted in early 2023 and felt absolutely awful for a good couple of weeks after, full on wave, after having no real waves for ages. It'll go again, you know it will.

 

Take it easy.

Xxx

@sunnysideup69 Hi, I just visited your thread and messaged you. Yes I'm sure it's the tooth thing, thank you for the reassurance. It's so frustrating when there's so much I want to do. So good to hear from you. x🙏😊

[Sonia009]

So, I thought I'd try to work through the muzzy/dizzy head feeling and do a bit of gardening. After ten minutes I was exhausted, weak and tired. Not sleeping well either, hubby up all night, his insomnia is getting worse. Sleeping tablets make him worse. He spoke to his doctor this morning who has arranged for him to see a sleep therapist🙏.

Seven weeks in on reduced Citalopram dose, when will this end I wonder. I am going to build up my strength for tomorrow, baking and visiting ( I hope).😏

Best wishes all.x

[Kat66]

Hey @Sonia009 just wondering how you're holding up?

[Sonia009]

26 minutes ago, Kat66 said:

Hey @Sonia009 just wondering how you're holding up?

@Kat66 Hya, thanks for asking, not too good at the moment, feeling a bit low. Getting some GI problems recent weeks, constipation, diarrhoea, epigastric pain, abdominal discomfort. The nausea seems to have passed for now. Still getting dizzy/balance issues but managing to dog walk when I can. I haven't been the same since having my tooth removed a few weeks ago. I'm getting those weird dropping sensations too but I've had these before. I think it's all got  something to do with the anaesthesia. My husband doesn't seem to be improving he's all aches and pains and doesn't sleep all night. That's why I haven't been here much spreading my doom and gloom. Anyway, how are you? I've been thinking about you. 😊