ScaredDad: Lexapro Reinstatement Help

[ScaredDad]

@Catwoman73thanks for being concerned it really means a lot.

 

my silence is one of fear and trying to be patient. I agree with the point of peak concentration but don’t know what to make of it. Because when I dose in the morning it seems to feel like it’s too much so for some reason I can’t handle the build but once it leaks I’m ok? Well sometimes ok? Just weird. 

[Catwoman73]

1 minute ago, ScaredDad said:

@Catwoman73thanks for being concerned it really means a lot.

 

my silence is one of fear and trying to be patient. I agree with the point of peak concentration but don’t know what to make of it. Because when I dose in the morning it seems to feel like it’s too much so for some reason I can’t handle the build but once it leaks I’m ok? Well sometimes ok? Just weird. 

There's lots of things that can affect the day to day variations- I suspect even what we eat impacts how we're feeling!  So being only 'sometimes ok' is probably expected.

 

Maybe the building up of the drug in your bloodstream is tough on you.  And then after you peak, the slow drop in that level gives you some relief?  Hard to say.  I don't think there's any way to know for sure what's going on there.  But there is some comfort in the semi-predictability- it's nice to know that the bad times are temporary.  Hang in there... I'm off to the dentist lol... not exactly my favourite place.

[ScaredDad]

@Catwoman73all fair points! It just sucks knowing I will NOT sleep and I will feel like death 7-12 and pray for a slight window.

 

@LostInCanada

@Emonda@LotusRising

i know lost in Canada had a long stabilization journey but they have also said they had many symptoms ease up early in which I don’t feel is totally the case for me. And in some ways I’m convincing myself I’m worse. Although idk how bad withdrawal was gonna get so maybe it is working a smidge? Not sure.

 

I just need another reassurance post since I’ve seen some horror stories lately related to stabilizing on the drug. Has anyone seen (and references would be life savers) someone as bad as me at this stage in reinstatement (terror insomnia, jerks, anxiety through the roof, SI at times, nerve pain, fog issues, complete Inability to function) continue reinstatement and make a recovery? 
 

I may be not giving me and @LostInCanada stories enough credit for similarities I just feel like I’m reacting slower to the reinstatement. Or maybe just worse to dosing. Please debunk me or share some insights!

I’m so tired and running out energy to fight this horrific situation

 

[LostInCanada]

55 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

when I dose in the morning it seems to feel like it’s too much so for some reason I can’t handle the build

The morning cortisol also comes in to play. Also when the reaction is so quick it borders on adverse. In your case it is just too high because your body is so over the merry-go round with anti depressants/drugs/supplements.

Patience, time and calm. It will settle and going down is the right direction. 👍

[ScaredDad]

31 minutes ago, LostInCanada said:

The morning cortisol also comes in to play. Also when the reaction is so quick it borders on adverse. In your case it is just too high because your body is so over the merry-go round with anti depressants/drugs/supplements.

Patience, time and calm. It will settle and going down is the right direction. 👍

Thanks as always. I need constant reassurance as I am so scared. I made a cut this morning and it will take 2 more to get to 2.25. I wanted to ease down just a tiny bit if I could not totally shock myself.  

[LostInCanada]

@ScaredDad I want to share this info from the moderator Onmyway. It is very interesting regarding drug manufacturers and how that comes into play:

I wanted to add some random facts about the generics and why switching between them in WD may have such a huge impact. So when the FDA approves a generic, that new chemical does not need to be tested in extensive clinical trials. The active ingredient is the same between the various generics but it is a new 'chemical entity'  because in addition to the drug part (the active ingredient) it also has some non-drug parts (inactive ingredients) which may differ between the different formulations. These inactive ingredients, which can vary, can modify and influence the absorption of the drug in the human body. So if the inactive ingredient inhibits the absorption, then you are practically getting less of the drug. But it can go the other way around as well, you could be getting more of the drug if the previous generic's inactive ingredients inhibited its absorption. For example for the liquid citalopram 8mg of the liquid is equal to 10mg of the tablets (at least the UK formulation) but similar 'equivalencies' exist between tablets. Problem is those are not disclosed or studied much so there is no table of equivalencies out there.  

 

When the FDA approves a generic, it tests it on a few people (usually young men) and measures how much of the drug is available in their blood at various times after they have taken it. If it is within 20% of the original drug (+/-) , then the FDA will approve that generic. For most people and most drugs 20% may not be such a huge deal but for sensitized CNS's it matters a great deal. For other drugs it matters as well so doctors have the option of writing "no-substitutions" between generics and original molecule drugs but I am not sure if they have that option between different generics. (Option in the sense that the pharmacist HAS to honor it and the insurance company HAS to accept it and pay for it). This is true for example for blood thinners and likely between large molecule drugs.

 

You can imagine that there are differences also between the influence of the inactive ingredient in one human body and another and between people of different ages or between women and men etc. 

 

This gets even more complicated as you are at the lowest dosages of tapering. The Horowitz paper showed how SSRIs (probably antipsychotics as well) occupy a large percentage of the SERTs at low doses - so at 1.30mg citalopram occupies about 30% of the SERTs, at 0.8mg  20% but at 5mg 50% and 20mg around 85%, so it's not a linear increase but a very steep curve at the low doses and a flat one at the upper doses. So as you go low and make a 20% decrease or increase as you change generics you may be making a bigger increase at SERTs than you would at the higher doses. Now SERTs and WD are correlated, it is most likely not the whole story but the principle is probably similar for other things that the changes impact. So if you can stock up for many years, it is worth the money spent if affordable and available. But I don't know how long you can store these drugs so that's another risk with long term storage. They might lose efficacy as you store them longer. 

[ScaredDad]

@LostInCanadasince I follow you I was literally just reading this post that you out on Baileys page. I wonder if that led to more activation once I got fully into the liquid. Hard to tell because I freaking increased too. Getting more of it faster… In any event, I’m going down so should flush some out? 

[LostInCanada]

7 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

led to more activation

Absolutely. The medium for the drug changed therefore absorption changed. Along with who knows what else they throw in.

[Catwoman73]

1 hour ago, ScaredDad said:

I wonder if that led to more activation once I got fully into the liquid. Hard to tell because I freaking increased too. Getting more of it faster… In any event, I’m going down so should flush some out? 

I took about two weeks to fully stabilize when I switched to liquid, and I stayed at the same dose, and made my own liquid, so I could ensure no new fillers, etc!  My symptoms were minor- added dizziness and nightmares- but I'm not in crisis mode at the moment.  I imagine the effect would be quite amplified for you.  

[ScaredDad]

@Catwoman73I have no idea what I need to do. This is such a losing battle.

 

im decreasing to 2.25 now though because my reactions have been awful.

[LostInCanada]

12 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

decreasing to 2.25 now though because my reactions have been awful.

This is a positive step and it can be reassessed in a week. Rate symptoms 1-10. It will any decrease or uptick in any symptoms. I believe you are headed in the right direction. 

[Catwoman73]

15 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

@Catwoman73I have no idea what I need to do. This is such a losing battle.

 

im decreasing to 2.25 now though because my reactions have been awful.

I've just been watching an interview that Angie Peacock did with Drew Linsalata (The Anxiety Guy)- something he said resonated with me- he said he only really healed after he stopped trying so hard to fix it.  There is so much truth in this- your body will heal, if you give it stability.  You don't have to DO anything.  Stop trying to guess what the best move is- just choose what you would like to do, and stick with it.  It's gonna suck no matter what, but it will also END no matter what.  Radical acceptance of where you are at right this minute.   Chasing normal is not going to work- allow millions of years of evolution to do its work- our bodies have evolved to heal.  By chasing a fix, you are really just pouring gasoline on a fire that is already burning out of control.  Trying to fix how you are feeling over and over is actually creating more anxiety.  I'm not saying any of this like it's easy, because it's not.  But it's a skill you can practice.  I wish it were easier, I really, really do. ❤️‍🩹

 

Question, out of my own curiosity- thinking back to when you were off the pills altogether.  Are you feeling better or worse now?  Reinstating does not work for everyone, so I'm just curious.

 

 

[LostInCanada]

2 minutes ago, Catwoman73 said:

he only really healed after he stopped trying so hard to fix it.

 

2 minutes ago, Catwoman73 said:

You don't have to DO anything.  

 

3 minutes ago, Catwoman73 said:

just choose what you would like to do, and stick with it.

Those three points....yes!

[ScaredDad]

@Catwoman73@LostInCanada to be 100% honest it’s a question I ask myself every day. I feel like I could’ve been progressing down still so no telling how far it was to go but when I reinstated I was more functional then than I am now. I was declining tho I think. And now I’m just like I guess reinstating, if failed, will make my withdrawal guaranteed even worse?

 

I have such a hard time believing that if just stuck to the 2.50 I would heal though. It was so damn painful it wasn’t like I was seeing small wins, the pain has been closing in on me. And to be honest with you it may just be a bad day or something but I literally almost feel like I can feel the cut I made. I went to 2.45!!!!!!!! I was gonna lop down to 2.35 or so tomorrow and then close in on 2.25. Idk if it’s worse or if I’m just crashing from sleep deprivation but I’m struggling. At some point each day I override this narrative but I often wish I didn’t reinstate or that I could rip it off now. There are people who spend 7 months plus on reinstatement and don’t improve At All! I can’t afford to do that guys 😢 

 

I’ll say the morning I reinstated my heart that night probably beat at 100bpm from 9pm to 5am for NO reason. Severe anxiety. That heart palp is gone but I’m physically almost sicker than then. I’m weak, my gut is ruined, and I’m much more sensitive now. If I’m like this on it what would off be like? Who knows, may be better! Who knows

[Dahlia50]

@ScaredDad To you 💛 from another who is struggling hard. Have many similar questions as you. Not easy no matter what it seems.

[LostInCanada]

29 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

There are people who spend 7 months plus on reinstatement and don’t improve At All! I can’t afford to do that guys 😢 

All I know is without reinstatement the healing takes longer. There is no quick fix. Reinstatement has helped you with some big things. It's the instability of dosage that has complicated things. But I am 1.5 years after reinstatement and still struggle, still have waves. Once we are in this situation we have to accept and carve out a new life that works within our new limits. Fighting it won't help 

[Catwoman73]

41 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

 

I have such a hard time believing that if just stuck to the 2.50 I would heal though. It was so damn painful it wasn’t like I was seeing small wins, the pain has been closing in on me. And to be honest with you it may just be a bad day or something but I literally almost feel like I can feel the cut I made. I went to 2.45!!!!!!!! I was gonna lop down to 2.35 or so tomorrow and then close in on 2.25. Idk if it’s worse or if I’m just crashing from sleep deprivation but I’m struggling. At some point each day I override this narrative but I often wish I didn’t reinstate or that I could rip it off now. There are people who spend 7 months plus on reinstatement and don’t improve At All! I can’t afford to do that guys 😢 

 

I’ll say the morning I reinstated my heart that night probably beat at 100bpm from 9pm to 5am for NO reason. Severe anxiety. That heart palp is gone but I’m physically almost sicker than then. I’m weak, my gut is ruined, and I’m much more sensitive now. If I’m like this on it what would off be like? Who knows, may be better! Who knows

You likely will never know for sure whether or not reinstating was the right thing to do.  But I suppose there's no utility in stewing over that... you are where you are, and all you can do is make decisions about what will and won't be your next steps.  

 

I'm going to challenge you on something... when you say you can't afford to spend seven months after reinstatement with no improvements- what is your concern about that specifically?  I mean, as someone who once (20ish years ago) spent 10 months in crisis after CT off of Effexor, I can tell you that it was awful, and the lost time was emotionally devastating.  And I know that's enough to make you tailspin, but look beyond that- what are your specific concerns about a prolonged serious withdrawal?  I only ask because, unfortunately, you can't control your healing timeline.  I mean, you can keep your drug levels stable, and you can do the best you can to manage your symptoms with non-drug methods, but your brain will heal in its own time.  I think it might be extremely helpful for you to go through the 'what ifs' in this situation.  What if you don't heal as quickly as you want to?  Don't let your emotions get the best of you when considering this- think logically (as hard as it is, it's important to set aside the emotional component).  Consider your career, your family, your own ability to manage, etc. Are you worried about losing your job?  Your career?  Your family?  Your sanity?  Then consider what you can do to mitigate those concerns now... like write an honest e-mail to your boss, and work through your concerns.  Talk with your wife, openly and honestly- figure out how to move through this together.  And so on.  Understanding what the fear really is, and what you can and can't control can be very empowering. 🤗

[ScaredDad]

@Catwoman73my biggest concern is my wife and not losing her because of my ability to provide for the family. Next is obviously my daughters and them having their dad in their life. I’m bed ridden right now and I’m still on it. My career is HUGE I made huge strides here and have an amazinggggg job and team. But if it takes me a year to get better while on the pill still k could still lose my job. I work for one of the biggest US banks. They just have policy they follow. 
 

assuming I can get disability I think we’d survive but at what costs to my wife and kids?

[LostInCanada]

@ScaredDad this is an iatrogenic illness. If you had cancer would you be analyzing and facing this obstacle differently? This is no different. It it just more misunderstood and harder because we do not have the support in place. 

[Catwoman73]

1 minute ago, ScaredDad said:

@Catwoman73my biggest concern is my wife and not losing her because of my ability to provide for the family. Next is obviously my daughters and them having their dad in their life. I’m bed ridden right now and I’m still on it. My career is HUGE I made huge strides here and have an amazinggggg job and team. But if it takes me a year to get better while on the pill still k could still lose my job. I work for one of the biggest US banks. They just have policy they follow. 
 

assuming I can get disability I think we’d survive but at what costs to my wife and kids?

All fair concerns.  No one would dream of telling you otherwise!  Now, what can you control RIGHT NOW?

 

You can't make yourself heal faster, but you can hold yourself stable, and allow your body and brain to do its job.  You can relentlessly pursue non-drug ways of managing your symptoms.  That is your job right now. That's what you can control.

 

You can work on getting disability approved.  If comfortable, you can spend one of your better moments sending your boss an honest e-mail, explaining your situation.  Tell him how much you enjoy your job, and tell him you really hope that it is there for you on the other side.  But that's all you can do- the rest is out of your hands.  The chips will fall where they may.  Ask yourself WHAT IF you do lose your job?  Yup, it would suck. But what else?  Be specific, and remove the emotion from your response.  By doing that, you can get a much clearer picture of what you actually have control over, and you can create a plan.  When everything is so out of control, we have to keep our eye on what we do have control over. 

 

And your family- what can you do to reduce the effect on your family RIGHT NOW?  Can you keep the lines of communication wide open, even if it's ugly?  Can you tell your wife how you feel, right down to the dirty details?  Can you ask for what you need from her, rather than leaving her guessing?  Can you tell her that this is going to take a long time, and you want to figure out how to make it work together?  This can create a closer bond- I can tell you that from experience.  Can you spend your better moments creating quality memories with your kids?  I don't know how old they are, but with older kids, you can explain things to them in a simple way.  They are surprisingly intuitive and compassionate (but I think yours are really young, no?).  And if all else fails, entertain that 'what if' again... what if your wife leaves?  What would that mean for you?  What would you do?  Again, I know it's emotional, but try to step away, and really think it through.  This will give you some sense of control.

 

I know this all sounds a bit cold and clinical lol, but it really is so helpful to really think these concerns through, rather than continuing to just react emotionally to the abstract ideas.  Sending hugs...

[ScaredDad]

@LostInCanada@Catwoman73

 

serious question guys. Maybe once I’m a little better so I don’t drag it down. Would yall ever consider zoom support meetings? I feel like this community needs it. You are both right. No, if this was cancer I wouldn’t be as worried about the job and losing my family because I wouldn’t. I really don’t think she’d leave me for this but it’s scary because it’s just so much on her. We have family here thank goodness to help. If she did leave? I’d just have to move in with my mom which I’m not convinced yet I won’t have to do anyway. I cannot drag everyone down with me emotionally 24/7 in the house. I think I’ll get there guys. I am going to get to 2.25 and freaking HOLD!!! The 2.50 was too much and I’ll never freaking second guess that. I’ve been saying it for a while. 
 

im meeting with my boss and their boss tomorrow. They are very understanding but to be fair more so on the I got destabilized by a drug but honestly in their mind it’s more of just get him back in something else. The company prides itself on mental health awareness so if they don’t believe it they are at least putting on a good show.

 

my kids are 2 and being born in 7 weeks or so. Hopefully they’ll never remember this. 

[LostInCanada]

5 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

Would yall ever consider zoom support meetings?

For me, no. I find live conversation sooooo stimulating and stressful but that's just me.

6 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

im meeting with my boss and their boss tomorrow

I find you to be very open and honest which works on here. My advice is to show discretion as to how much you share. Test the waters. If the response/reaction is good, you can share more. Think of it as layering the information.

9 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

my kids are 2 and being born in 7 weeks or so.

My suggestion is make a journal for each child. Record all your love and feeling for them, so that if physically/emotionally you can't be there for them the way you want, they will always have the evidence of your love. It will help you work through it too.

[ScaredDad]

Thanks @LostInCanada

 

i will for sure be careful in the over sharing. 
 

you guys I’m telling you idk if it’s just an awful day but I literally think I’m feeling worse withdrawal from that tiny cut. Idk what to do. The neurological symptoms are amped right now.

 

maybe it’s just the drug still idk but usually by 4 I’m calming down a tiny bit. Idk. I guess I resume dropping tomorrow

 

im so convinced im higher sensitized than most. If you were to take this drug out I really think I may just spontaneously light on fire. When you’re withdrawing that bad is it 24/7? How does it not kill you

 

OR is this just my withdrawal going on with no regard for my reinstatement? I hate this world right now. 

[Catwoman73]

45 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

@LostInCanada@Catwoman73

 

serious question guys. Maybe once I’m a little better so I don’t drag it down. Would yall ever consider zoom support meetings? I feel like this community needs it. You are both right. No, if this was cancer I wouldn’t be as worried about the job and losing my family because I wouldn’t. I really don’t think she’d leave me for this but it’s scary because it’s just so much on her. We have family here thank goodness to help. If she did leave? I’d just have to move in with my mom which I’m not convinced yet I won’t have to do anyway. I cannot drag everyone down with me emotionally 24/7 in the house. I think I’ll get there guys. I am going to get to 2.25 and freaking HOLD!!! The 2.50 was too much and I’ll never freaking second guess that. I’ve been saying it for a while. 
 

im meeting with my boss and their boss tomorrow. They are very understanding but to be fair more so on the I got destabilized by a drug but honestly in their mind it’s more of just get him back in something else. The company prides itself on mental health awareness so if they don’t believe it they are at least putting on a good show.

 

my kids are 2 and being born in 7 weeks or so. Hopefully they’ll never remember this. 

See- you sound a little less emotional now, just from thinking your way through that!  I'm not saying you'll feel the same way in five minutes lol, but they you just repeat the exercise- address the what ifs for whatever issue is causing you to spiral.  It definitely helps to bring us back down to earth!

 

Your kids are so young- they are not going to have any clue that this happened to you.  I think, given that your wife is going to be giving birth soon, it might be a good time to come up with a very good plan to help her get through the postpartum period.  It might make you both feel better if you entertain those what ifs around the birth.  What if you're still in terrible shape, and can't be there the entire time she is labouring?  What if you crash and burn after the birth, and she needs help caring for two little ones?  What if she ends up with postpartum depression, and you both are in terrible emotional shape?  These are all legit concerns, and if you have a plan to deal with what might be, perhaps you'll be able to relax, and focus on getting yourself to a place where you can be at your current best when the little one is born.  And the very act of having this discussion would certainly bring you two together during this difficult time. 

 

As for zoom, it's something I would consider at some point.  Right now, it's waaaay too hard for me to have in person conversations.  I always end up in rough shape after doing anything social.  I'm hoping that it will be a possibility someday though!  

[LostInCanada]

2 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

Idk what to do. The neurological symptoms are amped right now 

What is different? On a scale from 1-10 from yesterday. 

If you have been having anxiety and stress thinking about the cut that could be having an impact. 

Just breathe. You will be okay. Try to distract. Play a game online, read, listen to music.... whatever might work for you. 

Do you have access to a treadmill? Walking 20 minutes in the morning helps me immensely. 

[ScaredDad]

1 minute ago, LostInCanada said:

What is different? On a scale from 1-10 from yesterday. 

If you have been having anxiety and stress thinking about the cut that could be having an impact. 

Just breathe. You will be okay. Try to distract. Play a game online, read, listen to music.... whatever might work for you. 

Do you have access to a treadmill? Walking 20 minutes in the morning helps me immensely. 

The best way I can describe it is being plugged into a socket. To be fair I had some of this in pure withdrawal. It’s like my arms and legs just have electric current running all throughout. It makes walking weird. At those times tinnitus is high, teeth pain, muscle contractions on and off, and then just pure anxiety. 
 

I didn’t have a great day yesterday but at 430 I was at my mother in laws getting ready for dinner. I was maybe a 6.5 then and a 9 now. This feels like peak symptoms I remember. I wonder if drug free withdrawal is even worse. This stuff is so insanely powerful. No other humans can imagine the symptom profile

[Catwoman73]

That is the best way to describe the feeling @ScaredDad!  I remember my CT from Effexor- literally nobody warned me about any withdrawal effects, and I had no idea what was happening to me.  There was internet then, but not like today, where there was lots of available info on this stuff.  I thought I was just insane, but shoved it all down deep, because I didn't want to be committed.  I have no idea how I survived it back then.  If I had to describe hell, that was exactly what I would have described.  It really is the worst form of torture. 

 

When your anxiety gets to a 9, what do you do?  I think we know in our heads that we are really in no danger, but our bodies are reacting like we are being chased by a sabre toothed tiger.  We have to train our mind and our body to react differently... in those terrible moments, try to do something that challenges you, even a little bit.  Even if that means just stepping outside to get a breath of fresh air, or leaving your bed to grab a glass of water.  Over time, you can train your mind and your body to calm down by giving yourself small challenges.  It's kind of like exposure therapy for phobias- you can slowly desensitize yourself if you work at it.

[ScaredDad]

2 hours ago, Catwoman73 said:

It's kind of like exposure therapy for phobias- you can slowly desensitize yourself if you work at it.

yeah I can’t imagine how you handled that then. It’s so hard even now and back then no one knew about it.

 

This is the approach I am having to take. Whenever I’ve made myself do something it has seemed to help so long I don’t overdo it. It sucks how chemical it is but maybe I can at least dampen the systems response.. 

 

hope everyone has a great night! I hope everyone gets some sleep. 

[LostInCanada]

20 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

I hope everyone gets some sleep. 

Amen to that. 👍💯❤️

[ScaredDad]

Hey team. Well here we are. My work received it super well but want me to file for ST Disability. It’s a gut blow as I was hoping to get room to make it to my paternity leave and just take that instead but it is what it is. I took 2.39 today and do feel maybeeeeeee a smidge better than usual. I slept from like 1030-2 last night it felt like. Which has happened 2 times in 3 weeks max.
 

taking it day by day. Is it possible to feel better going down only .10? My day still is CRAP but it may be less crap. So far

[Catwoman73]

51 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

Hey team. Well here we are. My work received it super well but want me to file for ST Disability. It’s a gut blow as I was hoping to get room to make it to my paternity leave and just take that instead but it is what it is. I took 2.39 today and do feel maybeeeeeee a smidge better than usual. I slept from like 1030-2 last night it felt like. Which has happened 2 times in 3 weeks max.
 

taking it day by day. Is it possible to feel better going down only .10? My day still is CRAP but it may be less crap. So far

This is all good, @ScaredDad.  I really do think that disability is the way to go.  I know it's a tough pill to swallow (bad metaphor, under the circumstances)- I struggled with making that application too.  It was like taking yet another step towards acknowledging what was happening to me, and part of me was in a bit of denial at the time.  In the end, I'm incredibly grateful that I did it.  Surrendering to the process and removing that source of worry was the best thing I've done for myself to date. 

 

I think it certainly is possible to feel better going down by 0.1!  Optimization of your dosage will aid in stabilization for sure.  Since you are a tiny bit better where you are, would you consider holding here for a couple more days to see if you continue to improve where you are?

[LostInCanada]

1 hour ago, ScaredDad said:

My work received it super well but want me to file for ST Disability. It’s a gut blow as I was hoping to get room to make it to my paternity leave and just take that instead but it is what it is.

It's still a win. We have to grab hold of the blessings when they come out way. 

1 hour ago, ScaredDad said:

Is it possible to feel better going down only .10?

Absolutely, especially if you are too high.

But by bit. 💯👍

[ScaredDad]

29 minutes ago, Catwoman73 said:

I think it certainly is possible to feel better going down by 0.1!  Optimization of your dosage will aid in stabilization for sure.  Since you are a tiny bit better where you are, would you consider holding here for a couple more days to see if you continue to improve where you are?

Million dollar question, right? I am not sure as I want to slide down just a bit more before my body becomes overly accustomed to 2.39+mg. What sucks is everything lags. So you don't know you're to high/low until it is too late. I think I will go a few more steps and pause. Likely to the 2.25mg. 

 

Also, I am so scared about getting disability denied after reading all the crap you have to satisfy to the insurance company for "anxiety". My writeup looks more like withdrawal injury and there isn't much precedent for that so we are adjusting it a little. 

[LostInCanada]

4 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

My writeup looks more like withdrawal injury and there isn't much precedent for that so we are adjusting it a little.

Either way it wouldn't be happening without the initial "anxiety" diagnosis. My doctor leaned into the initial diagnosis and how the adjustment of medication resulted in all the WD complications. And how now that my CNS is sensitized it is impossible for more medication to be possible.

 

9 minutes ago, ScaredDad said:

I think I will go a few more steps and pause. Likely to the 2.25mg. 

This is reasonable.

[ScaredDad]

@LostInCanadai love it! Thanks for the insight 

[ScaredDad]

Has anyone else here had bad sensitivities? Because I have this I’m convinced I’m doomed…  I can FEEL the sensitivity. Whether it’s in my face and head, teeth, tinnitus. I can feel it on guard. I’m literally convinced the face lotion I put on last night made my lips numb. This is insane! I could drink 4 cups of coffee a day two months ago. The last two days I’ve felt this after lunch for the first time. Is my cns reacting to food now? I had baked turkey, potatoes, and Brussels. No condiments. 

 

but if I do the right thing and stop upsetting my cns it should start healing? I think the reduction is helping with this.